Why didn't they end up together?

>>212403958 (OP)
If he got with her he would no longer be the man she had a crush on. I have been in this situation it's a bitch.

>>212403958 (OP)
because of the ugly bitch he was dating

>>212403958 (OP)
I'm gonna say it, I didn't hate the Audrey + Billy Zane sideplot

>>212403958 (OP)
He knew she was going to blow up and/or marry a little person

>>212404797
A womans work is never done.

>>212403958 (OP)
Terrible neck posture

>>212403958 (OP)
His IRL girlfriend threw a bitchfit because they had too much chemistry so they killed the plotline and created Annie last minute.

>>212404522
>>212404999
>>212403958 (OP)
his irl gf was Donna btw, talk about subpar choices

>>212404779
All aboard the Zane Train, ladies

>>212403958 (OP)
She had the rape son of his evil doppelganger while in a coma, so they did somehow

>>212404999
That type behavior should be career ending.

>>212407110
LFB got her karmic retribution, don't worry

>>212403958 (OP)
Yeah I never understood that either. He's all like "you're too young" and then he goes on to date a woman who is only slightly older than her.

>>212404797
Do they ever address the explosion in The Return? I don't remember. Did she die and went to purgatory with the midge?

>>212407580
She recovered well enough to have a child. Considering other references to Tarantino in The Return, it was probably the Kill Bill situation.

>>212403958 (OP)
in the original timeline Audrey and Annie were the same

>>212407580
>Do they ever address the explosion in The Return?
when sheriff truman talks to doc hayward on skype, i forget what episode but doc mentions that he saw cooper at the hospital (after the events of season 2) and thought he was there visiting audrey after "that terrible business at the bank"

>>212405025
Oof. She was probably right to be jealous because how do you compete with an Audrey?

>>212403958 (OP)
cooper was a wise man
he knew if he fucked prime 18yo audrey horne that nothing else life has to offer would compare and he'd spend the rest of his life falling deeper and deeper into depression
little did he know the rest of his life would be spent sitting in the red room so he might as well have indulged in that sweet sweet pink little audrey pussy

>>212403958 (OP)
They did eventually fuck but under a more dubious situation

>>212403958 (OP)
Because Cooper wasn't a coomer. He had purpose in life more elevated than pumping butt.

>>212409225
come back when you finish season 2, anon

>>212405025
>>212407972
no bully. LFB was hella cute before..you know..

>>212403958 (OP)
Cooper prefers rude drunk whores for some reason.

>>212409384
she was very badly raped you see

>>212409341
Not canon

>>212409384
that's diane 25 years and a rape after cooper knew her
diane in '89 would have been more like laura dern's character in blue velvet

>>212403958 (OP)
He wanted Annie's puss puss.
Seriously though, what's up with Mr. Cooper and barely legal women?

>>212410504
He's attracted to purity

>>212410504
>she was only 21, you sick fuck!!

>>212407580
Her entire plotline in the return is to be used as an breedable onahole for Evil Coop.

Her hair in the pilot episode was so ugly
webm from season 2 unrelated

>>212403958 (OP)
>she was 17y 365d 23h 59m, you sick fuuuck! t. Cooper
>maenwhile based Ben Horne proudly displayed his teen lover prom pic on the desk
The glowie was a closeted fag. No other explanation

>>212407698
found it, ep 7
>Doc, do you remember way back when, the night Harry called you in to examine Special Agent Dale Cooper at the Great Northern?
>I can't remember what I had for breakfast this morning but I remember that.
>Tell me what you remember.
>Well, we all knew Coop, but that morning he was acting mighty strange.
>And?
>I took him to the hospital and I had him checked out while I made my rounds. About an hour later, I saw him sneaking out of intensive care, fully dressed. He turned and he looked at me and I saw that strange face again. I called out to him but he didn't say a word, he just turned around and walked out.
>What was he doing in intensive care?
>I thought at the time he might have been looking in on Audrey Horne. That terrible business at the bank and she was in a coma.

>>212410819
True, her pilot shoes were hot tho. Your webm's hair are perfect btw.

>>212403958 (OP)
annie had prettier hair

>>212410889
No she didn't

>>212403958 (OP)
I like Sherilyn Fenn. She's fun to talk to online, and still answers her DMs personally.

>>212411042
What did you send to her??? I hope you didn't say you thought Donna was hotter than Audrey...

>>212411098
Sent her black crime statistics and IQ studies.

>>212411040
Heather Graham aged better, Fenn looks like an employee at a farmer's market

>>212411042
>elder abuse
i guarantee you have brown skin