itt: times you acted like Anthony Bourdain

>>212476238 (OP)
Posted a reply.

>>212476238 (OP)
>>212476546
Posted two.

Searched my gfs name on aznude

>>212476238 (OP)
>have a final solution. have two
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QiQv-19e0zQ

Ate an oyster.

>>212476238 (OP)
getting cucked by my girlfriend while eating a ham sandwich with 2 cups of coffee to cope.

>>212476238 (OP)
Went to the park to smoke cigarettes with the local homeless guy even though I don't like smoking.

I had the cream sauce.

>>212476238 (OP)
Had two.

I'm drinking shit tier coffee right now.

>>212476238 (OP)
I wore a summer scarf once

>>212476238 (OP)
>felt extreme shame from being married to a literal whore that fucks her kid
>killed myself

I'm pretty fucking smug most of the time.

>>212476238 (OP)
I’m a ghost posting this from the grave

I got cucked.

I spent a couple years mainlining diesel

>>212476238 (OP)
Caught my wife having a few negroni’s

Negroni status?

>have a negroni
>have two
>then a few more
>get shitfaced
>get horny
>women are too much work
>download grindr
>get assfucked by a negroni
>get assfucked by two

>>212478240
kek

>>212478240
put me in the screencap boss

>>212476238 (OP)

>>212476238 (OP)
Where are people livestreaming his shows these days?

>>212478112
Aaaand they're soaking.

>>212476238 (OP)
Was he the shot caller of kitchens?

>>212476587
>>212477169
>>212477658
>>212477816
>t. Mumford and sons motherfuckers

>>212476238 (OP)
>marlboro reds (shit)
>muh 3 quarters
>baguette 2x longer than cuck plate
>with giant meat curtains hanging out (apt)
>coffee (99% cream/sugar, 1% coffee)
>druggie twig legs in pants that shouldn't be baggy
>pretentious leather with popped collar
>>scarf
>small round psued sunglasses
>looking right into the sun
>sitting alone
>no one within 50ft
>gf taking cocks just off camera
yeah it's time to eat some roadkill gutter meat

>>212476238 (OP)
I'm having a nice cuppa right now

I'm suicidal

>>212476238 (OP)
would he like coke and bacardi?

>>212478240

>>212479751
>>212476238 (OP)
>have a perfect cup of boiling, black, dense coffee
>ruin it with milk
What a faggot

>>212479904
Your homophobia is uncalled for. Anthony Bourdain is a legend and he can enjoy his coffee any damn way he pleases.

>>212480036
No, child, these are your delusions speaking.
Enjoy prison.

>>212479904
>grr I am tough guy. Coffee must be black like my wifes bf because I'm tough

You're the hot sauce guys of coffee.

>>212480157
>can’t even have a drink without thinking of race mixing cuckoldry

>>212478240
Assfucked by negronis you say?

>>212479694
What's the deal with the coins?

>>212480254
That story was insane, imagine getting forcefully checked into a mental hospital by your friends for BURNOUT and getting anally raped for a week. In his position, I would've invited all his friends for a party and stabbed them all in the stomach.

testgm0y0

>>212480386
>rapists get bored with raping him normally
>start playing games
>have bows with dildo arrows and first them at his anus, Rapin' Hood-style
>one of them dresses up as a night with a broomstick with a dildo tied at the end of as a lance and charges
>they strap his ass to a basketball hoop in the yard
>Babish hangs there his pants down and sobbing
>they take turns doing 3-pointers with a ball that looks like a bumbleball but with dildos
>they construct elaborate train sets and tie Babish to the floor with his asshole where the tunnel would be, with the train steaming ahead at breckneck speed with a dildo tied to it
>"Choo choo!" the rapists cackle right before the Dildo Express penetrates Babish's asshole and he screams and cries once again
>during Black History Month his big buck rapist keeps hoisting babish up with a rope like a lynching before letting him go before his ass slams into a dildo stuck to the floor and erect
>during Halloween burst into his room in Leatherface getup with a dildo chainsaw
>during Christmas rent a reindeer but instead of having a bright red nose it's a big ass dragon dildo and they make it charge to Babish's asshole
>months and months of creative ways to rape him as all he can do is cry and sob and scream when his asshole is penetrated

>>212480860
what a weird fetish

>>212476238 (OP)
One time I was a Jewish cuckold who encouraged white people to racemix and become extinct.

"In, I don’t know, 70-80 years, there will be no white people anymore, and only cappuccino-colored people. It’s good. It’s good. This is the only solution… It’s our only hope is to fuck our way out of this."

what is a negroni?

>>212476238 (OP)
I once texted a woman some romantic thing and got an "okay" back, though I just ended up breaking up with her and not killing myself

>>212482750
https://youtu.be/9Z0Ujet360s?si=cc-AC6Ebbd42jTQv

>>212482808
okay thanks, however wiki does offer more insights, apparently its some kinda italian cocktail. on a side note, negroni is actually a surname.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negroni_(surname)
and there is some poor wop director called bald ass negroni, lol.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baldassarre_Negroni

suck the cream sauce from a negroni
suck two

>>212482750
italian bottled lager

>>212478240
Don’t knock it until you try it.

>>212482750
A shitty cocktail made of gin, nasty bitter italian liqueur, and nasty wine.

>>212480386
The "burnout" reason was a either a cover up for a manic episode or drug use. Likely the latter.

>>212482750
>>212483196
>third world Russian subhumans have never heard of a negroni
These are the people I'm posting with holy shit

>>212484915
i guess if you don't have wine then mixing corn liquor with fruit juice isn't so bad
you can use different fruit juices and even add sugar

>>212476546
>>212476576
lol you guys are bananas

>>212480386
He checked himself in, not his friends. They were bringing up that he was working too much and he did have a mental breakdown schizo moment, but he ultimately checked himself into the mental institution because he hoped they'd sedate him with drugs. Instead he got raped and his wife left him lmao.

Like, imagine being retarded enough to check yourself into the loony bin for the purpose of getting drugs. "I've gone crazy, please give me drugs?!" What the fuck was he thinking.

Two boradin threads in the catalog.

>Man, that Anthony Bourdain guy, what a piece of work. He swaggers into every dive bar and street stall like he’s the first to discover it, waxing poetic about the soul of a noodle or the heartbreak in a taco. Meanwhile, he’s just a loudmouth with a camera crew, turning every gritty corner of the world into his personal stage. The guy’s got a knack for storytelling, sure, but it’s all so performative—those brooding stares, the over-the-top metaphors about life and death in a bowl of pho. He’s not eating; he’s auditioning for the role of world-weary food prophet. And don’t get me started on how he romanticizes every greasy spoon while conveniently ignoring the roaches in the kitchen. Classic Bourdain—charming, infuriating, and always a little too in love with his own voice. -Grok AI

>>212476238 (OP)
Never, I would never do anything like that Jew

>>212476238 (OP)
Honestly had no idea he was trans

>>212485150
>He checked himself in

>What are you in here for?
>The walls are melting and the wizard said I had to remove all of my family's eyes so the wraith couldn't see my sins. What about you?
>They asked me to make the Bob's Burgers salmon burger

>>212476238 (OP)
I gave a cup of coffee the bird.

>>212485778
>*proceeds to rape*

>>212485150

I suspect that he was also a severe alcoholic but that might just be me projecting.

>>212478240
I guess he ordered the cream sauce

>>212476238 (OP)
>ham is hanging down and touching the dirty table
jfc

>>212477100
>Singaporean model, where everyone is so mixed up you don't know who to hate
Isn't this guy supposed to be a traveler? Isn't that what he's famous for? Has he never actually BEEN to Singapore?

>>212476238 (OP)
neckd myself

Have a negro. Have two.

>go to restaurant
>order Negroni
>order two
>order 8 more
>start screaming /tv/ memes and laughing hysterically to myself
>get asked to leave
>call everyone a flavorfag dive slop eating trashtard
>hang myself in the shower

>“Eat your cheating girlfriends pussy tonight. Taste a weird rancid cream flavor. Have a cold pint in your hotel room alone while wondering who is fucking her at 4 AM. Think about how some guy is taking her places shes never been. Wonder why she hates you when she has nothing in common with you. Try not to imagine her getting turned inside out like the steak you ordered rare instead of medium rare for some reason. Wonder why her pussy smells like oysters. Google your girlfriend. Do it 299 more times. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with what google says your girlfriend is doing with other men, but tie the noose anyway. Choke slowly. Tip over the nightstand as you flail. Check the tightness of the knot by dropping harder. Check yourself out. Meanwhile shes enjoying the ride.” - Anthony Bourdain

>>212477100
Lol yes Singapore, where there are limits to the number of non Chinese who can live in public apartment blocks to ensure that property values aren't affected.

>>212476238 (OP)
I have my legs crossed like a faggot right now.

the only thing more frustrating than bourdain is people slowly coming around to the idea he sucks like they totally knew all along. fuck all of you, you're just as bad as him you bandwagoning illiterate shit bag fuck sucks. god just have ONE thought to yourselves for once in your miserable fucking lives holy shit. if anything, I wish more people hung themselves more often!

When I killed myself over some gassed up mid bitch

>>212485019
Anon...both posts were me...

>>212486488
>google your girlfriend

>>212479762
But I’m also a big procrastinator so it’s never going to happen.

>>212476238 (OP)
i'd never ACK like him

>>212484915
Sorry not everyone is an alcoholic, jeez