Thread 212530740

>>212530740 (OP)
more like Flat Sonja

>>212530740 (OP)
It looks just as cheap as the last Hellboy movie.

It looks like it has a slightly higher budget than Legend of the Seeker.
Reminds me of those Russian capeshit knock-offs

>>212530740 (OP)
White woman lead, brown man romantic interest, all the bad people are White.
Ticking all the boxes

>>212530740 (OP)
>>212530895
its LITERALLY made by a troon

>>212530931
Just another reason not to watch it

>>212530740 (OP)
I was fine with the CGI until the end. That giant monster looked pretty bad.

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks like a rather standard B movie.
The Misfits guy hamming it up doing Joaquin Phoenix seems alright.
The Red Sonja Actress left no impression
the music choice for the trailer was bad.

>>212530740 (OP)
>ugly brown guy as the boyfriend
DROPPED.

>>212530740 (OP)
I dont know shit about this(comics?), but is this supposed to be fantasy ot sc-fi? why do they have weird tank vehicles or whatever tis is?

>>212530931
before they trooned out they did do that alright Solomon Kane film which had a shit script, Purefoy was well cast as Kane at least.

>>212530740 (OP)
What is this truck thing supposed to be exactly? I thought Red Sonja takes place in the distant past with Conan the Barbarian unless this version is like a future where magic and monsters has come back or something.

>>212530740 (OP)
lack of bikini armor gives me onions vibes

>>212530740 (OP)
>sonja is white and cute
>chainmail bikini
>delicious tummy
I'm sold.

>>212530931
How are they so samey and predictable? And how can they be so fucking samey and not start to wonder about themselves? How can the porn industry be so integral to the core of their identity and they still think they’re people? Actually I guess they probably get off on the lack of free will since that’s how they perceive women, it makes them feel like their idea of women.

>>212530740 (OP)
THAT MOTHER FUCKER HAS A LIGHTBULB!?

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks very 2000s, mite b cool actually

>>212530740 (OP)
Sword&Sorcerybros... we are never getting another Conan (1982) are we?

>>212530740 (OP)
Yeah HIRE a FUCKING CHILD to play a warrior why not?

>>212531122
>>212531129
Looks like something He-Man would have access to

>>212530740 (OP)
a good red sonja wouldn't have to b facing away from the camera

>>212531253
Do you really want modern jewywood to make a new Conan movie?

>>212531325
I guess not

>>212531178
This also make me think there's some kind of remnants of a technological past in their world or something.

>>212531356
It would be so awful it would make the Momoa Conan movie look good by comparison.

>>212531122
Red Sonja has a weird origin in that she is a creation of Roy Thomas for the Marvel Conan Comics, but she is based on a REH character called Red Sonya from the story The Shadow of the Vulture, which was set in the 16th century in Hungary.
Since Red Sonja is different from Red Sonya, she got split off from the rest of the REH estate and Conan IP into her own series at some point when they made a film in the 80s, which is why Schwarzenegger shows up in that film.
Sonja herself is set in the same setting as Conan, so the Hyborian Age, but instead of being from Cimmeria like Conan is from she's from Hyrkania.
her main villain is the Empire of Turan, a sort of Persia expy
pic unrelated i didn't have a small enough version of the Hyborian map to upload

>>212531404
>Momoa Conan movie
I liked it.

>>212530740 (OP)
>who ask for this?
>weak legs --> how dare you complain about ballerina?
she had one job (look strong) and failed at it

>>212530740 (OP)
Solomon Kane wasn't that bad. Just not very memorable.

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks like a subpar random cosplay

>>212530740 (OP)
will watch
>>212531136
not quite as skimpy as I'd like but it'll do, we need to bring back tummy kino

I hate women, but I love Sword & Sorcery and this looks like it could be decent if you accept its low-budget flaws. And even though the director trooned out he has made entertaining movies before.

>>212531418
man stylized art is still years light ahead of modern cinema.

based.

>Director M.J. Bassett has explained why Red Sonja will not be a victim of sexual assault in the upcoming film reboot.

>Speaking with The Hollywood Reporter, Bassett revealed that the new Red Sonja film would not feature Sonja being raped by marauding enemies, which was a key plot point from the original 1985 film. "I have no interest in fictional women who use [rape] as an engine of motivation," the writer/director said. "It’s not a strong motivation. She’s just a human being in the world of femininity." Bassett added that Red Sonja will also steer clear of sexual politics and gender: "I didn’t warm to the previous script, which was much more sexual politics. Obviously in my personal life I’m interested in that. But as a storyteller I don’t think it’s interesting."

>M. J. Bassett (born Michael J. Bassett) is a British film and television writer, director, and producer.
>In 2017, Bassett came out as trans.
>it takes a troon to make a comic-accurate Red Sonja

>>212531602
she looks weaker than prebutch gabriel

>>212530740 (OP)
too many clothes

>>212531418
So, whats that futuristic-ish looking vehicle in thetrailer?

>>212530740 (OP)
I do not wish to view this.

>>212531785
Either a piece of ancient Atlantic/Lemurian/Velsuain/Thurian technology from the previous age or a bad prop in a tight budget film

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks like one of those parodies for adults.

Aren't they trying to reboot Conan?

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks like a cheap fan-movie.

>>212531918
Looks better than a porn flick, but not good enough for television.

>>212530740 (OP)
Who is the target audience for this?

Is this out in theatres or is it on demand?

>>212532213
pusi

Wow looks like total shit. This women is way too dainty and pretty. Sonja is a hardened bitch with some muscles.

>>212532413
A big bitch ready for SNU SNU.

Wallis Day is back

>>212532224
>comics made for men to enjoy the female body
>they decide to adapt the comics but refuse to let men enjoy the female body
Why are they doing this again? Who is their audience?

>>212532946
>However, the character's trademark bikini will remain the main costume for the film.

>>212532946
Probably just a Uwe Boll type tax scam.

>>212530740 (OP)
>No big tits
>No watch

Had one job

>>212532991
They will keep it but it's not for men to enjoy, so probably it will look as ugly as possible.

>>212530740 (OP)

Gotta respect their decision to NOT get the easy profits they could have gotten.

>flat sonja
>directed by a literal tranny
not interested

>>212530740 (OP)

> Red Sonja
> With an A Cup

One job.

>>212533312
>bigger than an A cup
okay incel

The troon that did Silent Hill 3D did this

>>212533095
they showed it in the trailer anon. the problem isn't the bikini but their purposeful obfuscation of her body while wearing it in most of the shots.

>>212533378
and a Solomon Kane film, which is more relevant when talking about this film

>>212533399
looks ok to me.

>>212533399
fridge

>>212533532
THAT'S the problem.

Why is violence okay in Hollywood films but an attractive woman looking sexy is bad?

>>212533399
>no boobs
Are they serious?

>>212530740 (OP)
I loled at the armor part. Just give me sword and sorcery kino. Sexy women are a plus.

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks ok

>>212533399
kek it looks like those frilly bikinis for kids on her "chest".

>>212533399
gives me tomb raider 2018 vibes. cast a flat stick to play a busty bombshell. lutz even looks like vikander. this movie does look better than the tomb raider reboot tho.

>>212533399
>safe bikini
Kek

>>212530740 (OP)
Lord protect me, here we go.
Shit I couldn't stand the whole thing. Goddman not like this.

>>212531418
Speaking of something with red sonja vibes, years and years ago I saw what looked like a screenshot from this b movie of this dark haired woman in this red bikini/loincloth with a crossbow, in a mountainous region with these two dead mongol looking guys on the floor. I still have never scratched that itch of what the fuck the sauce of that was. Any help?

fucking lmao

>>212534524
Deathstalker 3?

>>212534708
No. I was even looking at that at the same time as you replied after consulting grok.

Looks extremely cheap.

>>212533399
bitch lacks muscles

>>212530740 (OP)
>this is gooner chuds are fine with as long at it has some skin showing
Grim as fuck

>>212530740 (OP)
Wow that poster does not sell me at all

>>212534563
Them niggas lookin zesty.

>>212530740 (OP)
i'm honestly surprised they cast a white woman

>>212530740 (OP)
literally looks ai generated

>>212530740 (OP)
Why is she holding a dagger like it's a sword?

>>212535265
/tg/ would have a field day with that poster alone

>>212531373
there is since atlantis was real, but no one in atlantis was driving a fucking oil tanker

>>212531356
Saved. I also want a version of him in the "standing in the corner of a party" meme

>>212531458
It's not that bad, it's just bad that is Conan.

>>212534444
you didnt honestly think this was going to be anything but hot garbage did you? she looked like a little boy in the teaser image dude. it was DOA

>>212531695
thats pretty based

>>212531325
they made one like 15 years ago starring Jason Momoa. Nobody watched it and it bombed tho.

>>212531458
You're a fag and not white

>>212531695
It's baffling how these people keep crashing and burning, bleeding money over and over, and they still keep doing the same. When will they learn?

>>212531299
Sauce

I found this comment on R**it.
>Quote from a post a long time ago:

>“So here's how this whole thing works. I'm a film producer. I go to these investors and tell them I want to make this movie. They front me a certain amount of the money to get things set up with the rest put in a fund I can access when production begins. I take this money and buy up the rights to...something. A book, a comic, a video game, whatever I can get cheaply that still has some sort of name recognition to it. I then take that license, get a completion bond (basically insurance that will pay to finish the film if production runs out of money).

>So I go to film distributors all over the world to pre-sell the rights. I haven't made the movie yet, but here's proof we've got the investment money for production already, I've got a completion bond so the film will be finished, I've got name recognition from the licensed product, and I promise name actors in the film. Oh, and there's going to be lots of violence and sex to bring in the kids. They then agree to distribute the film.

>And my movie's already made its money back. Say I got $30 million from the investors. I sell the rights for $3 million to 10 different territories (it's more complicated than this, but you get the idea). So the film's now going to open in the US, England, China, Australia, Japan, India, etc. and, so long as I deliver a film, my production budget is covered.

>(1/3?)

>>212530740 (OP)
I'll pay them not to release this

>>212535782
>You may notice at no point in this process have I mentioned hiring a screenwriter. That's because the script doesn't matter. As long as they get something that's at least 80 minutes, they won't care. You'll also notice I didn't mention hiring actors yet.

>Ever wonder how Boll got those big-name actors? This is how. So I call up various agencies and say, "I'm shooting in [insert country here] for these parts in about a month. Who do you have that's available?" No auditions or rehearsals or any of that crap. I just want someone with a name. The actors don't care about the script, they just want the payday. Maybe they spent two weeks doing callbacks and cleared their schedule for a big part they didn't get. Or maybe contract negotiations fell through. Maybe they were on hiatus from shooting a TV show. Whatever it is, these actors weren't busy at that time.

>They'll get hired for parts that don't require a lot of shooting time, like the villain or the mentor character or whatever. Fly out to somewhere in Eastern Europe, get put up in a nice hotel, work for 3-4 days shooting a few scenes then they get killed, fly home, cash the check. It's easy money. Even if it means I'm shooting all of Sir Ben Kingsley's lines before any of the other cast he's interacting with are even in the country yet. Even if I have to use two different locations for the different angles. Even if I have to shoot one of them in the morning
>(2/3)

>>212535099
My nigga - ain't nobody praisin' this shit.

>>212535835
>So I shoot the movie. Time is money since I'm having to pay every single person on the set and every foot of film that runs through the camera costs money (or the hard drives and servers holding the footage for films shot on digital video). No time for second takes. Practical effect didn't work out like I wanted? Screw it, I'll fix it in post if I have time. I can't waste an hour doing a reset. Is Michael Madsen drunk? Fuck it, if he slurs too much I'll dub in his dialog in post-production. Not with Madsen himself, he'd cost too much, but a cheap voice actor who'll impersonate him and will only charge me scale.
So we're done and we have a movie. Post-production is done just as fast and cheap as production. Color correction, editing, special effects other than big set piece visuals (like wire removal) are done as quickly as possible since this equipment costs a lot to rent and the people doing the work aren't cheap to hire. Voila, release the print to the distributors, cash their checks, and return your money to the investors. All before the film is seen by a single person or a single ticket has been sold.

Now what happens if I'm not able to finish the movie? That's where that completion bond comes in. I'm shooting in a foreign country because everything's cheaper due to exchange rates. So I show up in South America, convert all my money to the local currency, and start shooting. Oops, the currency just completely tanked and the money that used to be worth $10 million in my bank is now worth $1 million (this happened on Highlander 2, though with slightly different numbers). So I can't afford to pay everyone on the set to get the film finished.

>(3/4?)

>>212535902
That's when the completion bond company steps in. They pay out enough money to finish the film. At this point, they will take over production too. They'll rewrite the script, throw out the director, and basically do whatever they have to do to get enough footage to finish the film. Doesn't matter how shitty it is, they only care about it getting done. Yes, even moreso than Uwe Boll.

Okay, so say that didn't happen and I made my movie. This has been done for decades. This is how Roger Corman made his films and how they make all those SyFy Original Movies (only they sell off the sensationalist title rather than a license), among many other low-budget production companies who do exactly this. What is Uwe Boll doing that's different?

Well, the investors aren't taxed on their investment in the film, only on the profits they make on the film. So you give me $1 million to invest in the film, I then return the $1 million to you. You don't pay any income tax on that $1 million. So say the tax rate is 50% in Germany at your tax bracket. You investing that $1 million to me knowing you'll get it back (I'd pre-sold the distribution rights, remember?), I just effectively made you $500,000. This specific loophole was closed in 2006, but there's still a lot of other tricks.

The first is creative bookkeeping. For those who may be wondering, how could these films lose money if they're already making a profit before they're even written, let alone shot? When you invested the money with me, I promised to pay back your investment out of gross revenue, but pay you profits out of net revenue. And if you look at the accounting, no film in the history of Hollywood has ever made a dime.

>(4/5)

>>212535927
>There are so many ways to fiddle with the accounting on a film it's insane. There’s a Wikipedia article on Hollywood accounting if you're interested in a good starting point on this subject.

>So that's how Uwe Boll survived for so long. It's how Roger Corman built an empire, how studios like Troma, Full Moon, The Asylum, and all the others you can think of do/did it. It's not just smaller companies either. Equilibrium never got a wide release in the US because it had already made its money this way. If they'd made the thousands of prints and put the money into advertising the film, it might've lost money. Why take the chance? So people found it slowly and it became a cult hit. So even A-list studios do this exact same thing.”

>(5/5)

>>212535782
>>212535835
>>212535902
It continues to be an embarrassing shithole full of posers. You can glean that story from any number of documentaries on how Uwe Boll or Cannon Films shysters really made their money.

>>212531299
Hummina hummina.

Looks like some low rent shot in Eastern Europe shit

>>212530740 (OP)

OH MY GOD DOES THAT LOOK LIKE UTTER FUCKING DOG SHIT

HOLY FUCKING GOD

you asshats told me it's gonna be Sweeney, who the fuck is this?

Looks like a cheapo tax credit movie, that doesn't mean it'll be terrible. Matilda Lutz is a good actress.

>>212531418
Did Sean Murphy draw the pic you posted?

wait wasn't it sydney sweeney?

>>212531506
well, at least xyr passes

>>212530895
Did not see a single brown person in the trailer.

>>212531418
I need to go back to reading the old Marvel Conan comics one day. I'm going through a ton of pastiche and re-readings of REH's Conan stories and have loved them all. I can't get enough of the Hyborian age. I wish REH didn't kill himself. Such a fucking loss.

>>212536995
nope, never

>>212530740 (OP)
>OMG SHE'S SO STRONG AND BRAVE!

K I N O

>>212531299
She looks fun. Who is this?

S E X O

>>212531404
The only thing I remember about Momoa Conan is that the evil sorceress dressed up like her mom and really wanted to bang her dad.

M O N S T E R

>>212531695
>>212530740 (OP)
>>212530931
>muh safe horny
You know what, maybe the death of sword & sorcery as a genre is worth it if it means putting troons out of work.

>>212531299
As I’m sure you know, this post is pointless without pictures of her feet

Hey, Rhona Mitra

>>212539606
It’s such a miss that she never got to play Lara Croft
In her prime, she was perfect for the role
I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that Lara’s designers took inspiration on Rhona

>>212539606
Do they?

>>212539684
At least she was one of the models for live events during the early days. At least we got Doomsday with her in the lead.

>>212530740 (OP)
lmao this looks like direct to dvd movie

is the og red sonja good?

>>212540023
nevermind it looks great

>>212531695
trannies do love weird sexual shit so the director being one kinda works. the movie still looks like shit though.

>>212532224
Alba's one leak was nice. Wish she accidentally posted more Chris Evans sexts on Insta.

>>212530740 (OP)
So what happened to the one with Ghost from the MCU?

>>212531695
in other words
>I don't like Red Sonja, so who knows why I made a Red Sonja movie. You shouldn't watch it

Pure cringekino. I will watch your movie

oooh I can't wait to see her get raped

>>212538846
hot

>>212530740 (OP)

Terrible casting.

Also, who is the main Bad Guy? I know I've seen him in some other flick or tv show?

>>212537795
Howard was the greatest.

>>212538846
Shouldnt the actress be bulkier?

>>212541102
and hollywood be like "you're hired!"

wow she's actually wearing the loincloth in this scene (meaning her ass will be partially visible)

>>212538846
hnnnnnnnnnng bare midriff bros we are winning

>>212531136
based coomer

>>212541793
>implying they won't shoot and block around it so its always obscured

>>212534563
The "white sheets covering set walls plus a cast iron brazier = medieval" aesthetic is the cheapest, tackiest thing there is.
A yellow truck in the middle of your ancient fort set isn't as bad as this.

>>212539606
She's going to play the same role Ron Perlman did in the 2011 Conan.

>>212540692
This is the same one, she dropped out of the role.

>>212541793
Imagine the smell.

wonder how much they'll show of this scene when she changes into the bikini outfit. i'm guessing the guy will offer to help adjust the outfit

>>212539124
Nice

>>212530740 (OP)
> that protects nothing
Another fucking reddit movie.

>>212530740 (OP)
This looks like kinda comfy and maybe even soulful bros idk...

>>212542510
at least they make her wear it

>>212542679
I actually thought it looked better than superman and I was going to watch it until that last cringe scene.

>her face when she realizes she has to wear the loincloth bikini armor

HNNNNNNNG

>>212542763
if it was reddit, they wouldn't make her wear it.

>>212533399
so sexy

>>212530931
Fucking tragic what happened. He made one of the best low budget fantasy/action films in years and then those fucking kikes roped him into Silent Hill Revelation and then trooned him out

>>212541937
nah they gotta show her butt at some point. it would ruin the immersion not to show her fully from behind or the side at least once

>>212533399
nigga what are you talking about? her full torso is visible in the shot you posted?

>>212533399
This is fuckin Vampirella adaptation levels of prudish faggotry

>>212542789
The whole trailer reminded me of the D&D movie. Which was a movie that got worse and worse the more you thought about it. I'm tired of cringe. Just have her wear it because she wants to be sexy not because "le reddit humour lol we must joke about it not protecting anything cause that's nerdie right? I'm trans btw" fuck off with that shit.

>>212542996
no it's hotter when she has to wear it because it's humiliating

>>212543058
>it's humiliating
Yeah, that's what I want from my bikini warrior queen movie.
Fuck this shit.

>>212543081
nigga it starts out humiliating, but she grows into it and embraces it's sexiness

>>212530740 (OP)
looks like one of those aslyum films, but even more retarded since it isn't even trying to trick someone into watching the wrong movie by mistake

>>212543168
Gay shit like that isn't sword and sorcery.

>>212543168
that's retarded. she should wear it on purpose because it humiliates her opponents. even when doing the most basic bitch 'le ebin womyn empowerment' you can't help yourself from making it as shitty as possible just to be spiteful

>>212536995
That is the Barberella remake.

>>212540023
Heavens no

Only watching if there’s ryona

>>212543168
The genre isn't about "why character wears outfit". It's shameless exploitation to its core. Beautiful and powerful people being the mightiest warriors to ever live. If you're acting like a redditor and asking for real world logic, then you've already fucked up and shouldn't be making sword & sorcery.
These amazons here didn't "grow into" their outfits. They put that shit on because in their universe, it works.

>>212543383
Human vermin with souls blackened by bile and hate are incapable of recognizing the intrinsic appeal of beauty, so they will never understand your point anon. They can never see a woman who isn't ugly and not be filled with loathing, the only way they can even conceptualize a person as attractive is when that appeal is used as a weapon to humiliate and belittle others. Many such cases. Sad.

>>212543487
>they will never understand your point anon
They understand it.
They just despise it.
They should be mopping floors for a living.

>>212530740 (OP)
>expected garbage
>its actually looks nice
>a lot of stunts
>but the chick isn't athletic enough

Damn, they seem to fail at the only thing they had to do right.
But it has so many stunts in old school style.

>>212530740 (OP)
>shows tummy
I will now watch your flick.

>>212542871
That flick was dull nonsense.
Stupid movie.

>>212539338
is safe horny vs unsafe horny just male gaze vs female gaze?

>>212544479
Imagine getting filtered so hard by a simple fantasy film.

>>212530740 (OP)
Looks pretty shit.

>>212533356
are you fucking blind? >>212533399 Does everybody tell you how big you are?

>>212544505
Any term that implies that sexualization in media is safe or unsafe is immediately male gays and/or female gays.
It's fucking gay.

>>212533602
>directed by a tranny you say?
no shit, built like a 10yo.

>>212544479
FILTERED!

>>212530740 (OP)
The skirt just ruins it for me.

>>212535345
it's a prequel to fury road, set in the mad max universe, dumb ass

>>212542886
does anybody have tits in this universe? Are they all cryptotrannies?

>>212544505
Male gaze and female gaze are the same gaze. The alternative is fat ugly women gaze and gay basedboy gaze.

>>212543197
that movie was a trip

>>212542769
are there more movies like this

>>212534708
"I will have mah revenge!... and set Deathstalker free!"

>>212540023
Lol no

>>212530740 (OP)
Before I click on this is this the actual trailer or fake clickbait?

>>212545521
If it were fake clickbait, Sonja would have tits.

It's obvious just from the few lines in the trailer she can't act for shit. I mean, neither can Bridgette Nielsen but at least that film was campy fun.

>>212545826
Monique Gabrielle can't act and she did an excellent job in a dual role in Deathstalker 2.
I will call you a faggot if you disagree.

>>212537126
well except for that giant fucking Adams apple

>>212545575
I was on mobile and don't get a thumbnail, just got home and turned my PC on though.

>>212536960
No, it's art by Gerardo Zaffino, it was published in one of the new Savage Sword comics

>>212530740 (OP)
>no conan in sight
fuck off with this fag shit. White woman antagonist and some store brand littlefinger cosplayer

>>212547304
>>212547319
Directed by a woman btw.

>>212540023
It'd be passable with some consideration of how old it is, except for the chinese kid and his buffoon. God that was fucking boring, annoying and terrible.

>>212547394
Conan wouldn't show up anyway for legal reasons

>>212530740 (OP)
>no tits
>no ass
>no physique

Who is this for?

>>212547440
He could just say his name is Kalidor and wink to the camera.

Is TUMMY KINO back on the menu, boys?

>>212530740 (OP)
>Fantasy Rock Music
At least the trailer is self aware that it's a straight to DVD movie. Looks good for what it is tho.

This movie looks like it has porn parody budget, what the fuck kek

The world would be a better place if we executed any adult man that unironically said "tummy"

>>212530740 (OP)
too cheap looking
too grimy
too white

>>212547911
i'm in trouble haha

>>212547911
>brownoid alert
But then that seems to be half of this thread, lamenting that Matilda Lutz doesn't look like some baboon-esque negress.

>>212547911
agreed, real men refer to them as "tumtums"

Rough.

>>212549749
how she likes her sex

>>212544479
retard

>>212530781
Fpbp

>>212541793
>has to wear this because she has been enslaved and symbol of being degraded
Hot.

yooooo where the tits at?

Looks like Uwe Boll movie from 2004

>>212547461
Bare midriff connoisseurs

>>212543383
That’s not how the origin of her outfit is described in the books

>>212547954
man of culture

>>212530740 (OP)
She's got zero sex appeal. Looks like a Taco Bell employee in their halloween costume. Pass.

>>212530931
>its LITERALLY made by a troon
make that a hard pass

>>212531418
>pic unrelated i didn't have a small enough version of the Hyborian map to upload
Got u senpai

>>212535927
>And if you look at the accounting, no film in the history of Hollywood has ever made a dime.
that everyone knows this yet never once has this shit been sorted out is infuriating

>>212533264
>a warrior should actually be a fat, tatted-up plastic whore
Okay, I got you, /tv/.

>>212551567
rather watch her than the bitch they actually went with

>>212551644
Matilda mogs her

>>212542769
Going to edge up a storm to this scene

>>212551383
This man is HOMOSEX.

>>212547911
Define adult

>>212535463
I watched it and I liked it, was nice for Conan to be a wise ass like he is in the books. I love the Arnie movies but Conan in those is basically an entirely different character compared to the source material.

>236 posts and no one mentioned the hot white-haired villainess
What are you, gay?

>>212530740 (OP)
More like Rape Sonja

>>212552092
Nigga you gay, fuck out of here

>>212552116
There were a couple that mentioned her. Check the thread again.

>>212530740 (OP)
Made it about 10 seconds in and tapped out. Another tiny bed-wench fighting giant men in full armour and kicking their asses.
Looks bad enough that I might even skip the torrent.

>>212530740 (OP)
I will be gooning to this

>>212544774
why would red sonja be a prequel to mad max

>>212530802
Same production company.

>>212547407
Yeah, a very very lesbian one

>>212530740 (OP)
>No tits
>No Ass
>No rape
What is the point of a sword and sorcery movie without sex appeal? Especially a female led movie. Newsflash, no one watches female led action movies for the stunts. They want to see some bitches with nice bodies get bloodied and possibly raped.

ffs, at this point even joey king would be a better red sonja

>>212532213
Where's the bush?

>>212555940
Red Sonja's such a perfect vehicle for sword & sorcery sexiness, too. Obviously, she is (or SHOULD BE) extremely sexy. And her origin story should be her getting (almost) raped. Which is very sexy, of course. Then, during the attempted-rape, she begs anybody who will listen for salvation, and a goddess gives her the power to never be defeated by any man in combat, then she murders the fuck out of the would-be rapists (extremely sexy as well, of course). But then she realizes, the goddess was playing a joke on her, because a clause in the divine contract was that she's no longer allowed to have sex except with a man who has defeated her in combat. And, remembering that she actually loves sex when she isn't being raped (at least when the rapists is ugly), she goes on a mission to find a guy who can kick her ass, so that she can finally get laid.

The whole movie writes itself from that point on. She'll go around sexily murdering guys until finally some guy breaks her curse and penetrates her magically restored hymen.

>>212530740 (OP)
Absolute slop

>the entire reason why people care about red sonja is her ass and tits
>casts a flat chested flat ass actress
yeah, this is gonna flop. this movie needs the male gaze or it flops.

>>212530740 (OP)
There are porn parodies with better production values than this. Movies are actually dead

>>212530740 (OP)
That's just sad. Imagine being a woman and have zero feminine traits, including the face.

>>212535463
>>212552107
The real frustrating part is that Momoa would have been an excellent rival/antagonist for a properly cast Conan. I could easily see him play a mercenary captain, bandit or pirate chief or the enemy wizard's bodyguard, anything but Conan himself.

>>212530740 (OP)
Costume looks plastic.
Hair looks like dye.
Acting looks phoned in.

Weinstein would have made this a *good* movie. Just saying.

Well after watching that I feel like I've seen the whole movie.

>>212552107
>a wise ass like he is in the books
what conan books did you read?

>make movie that needs a red haired heroine
>cast some non-descript bitch with no muscle, no presence who looks weird with fake red hair on

>>212557483
Who would you cast as Conan? After reading a hundred of the old black & white dark horse comics as a kid, I can't think of anyone I've seen who'd be able to pull him off to my mind. All the big guys all have such bloated/soft faces.

>>212557789
Arnie

>>212557801
Too austrian-looking.

>>212543383
>>212543507
>>212557296
>If you're acting like a redditor and asking for real world logic, then you've already fucked up and shouldn't be making sword & sorcery.
Red Sonja was never canon though
It was never a sword and sorcery work
It was a capeshit hack reworking howard's original character
And the character red sonja was based from wasn't le bikini clad bimbo
>It was a woman, dressed as von Kalmbach had not seen even the dandies of France dressed. She was tall, splendidly shaped, but lithe. From under a steel cap escaped rebellious tresses that rippled red gold in the sun over her compact shoulders. High boots of Cordovan leather came to her mid-thighs, which were cased in baggy breeches. She wore a shirt of fine Turkish mesh-mail tucked into her breeches. Her supple waist was confined by a flowing sash of green silk, into which were thrust a brace of pistols and a dagger, and from which depended a long Hungarian saber. Over all was carelessly thrown a scarlet cloak.
Once again secondaries who have never read the original works misunderstand sword and sorcery

>>212557855
isn't the first story she shows up in the one where she's fleeing into the jungle after making some guy mad with her, and conan chases after her to keep her safe? and then I guess they find something weird in the jungle. maybe some dinosaurs. maybe a flying monkey devil. maybe a castle with drugged out people in it. always some weird shit in those jungles in Howardland. but anyway, sexy sonja is a way more appealing character.

>>212533299
>directed by a literal tranny
had to google, but it's true

>>212557954
That's a conan story featuring a completely different character
Howard's story the shadow of the vulture is set exactly in the early 1500s
The idea of howard's work and sword and sorcery in general as a world featuring buxom amazon babes and constantly shirtless barbarians is what happens when you don't actually read the original stories and instead read capeshit and watch movies

>>212539454
This.

>>212547954
based

>>212557816
Nu uh

Why does she have handlebars on her ass

The truth is that howard's original writings, and then the various media "adaptions" of his work might be two entirely different universes.
Like how conan is described wearing medieval plate armor in half a dozen stories yet if you only read the comics and saw the art you'd think plate armor never existed in the Hyborian age
>And while the fallen king stared with burning eyes that reflected the bitter rage and humiliation that ate his heart, the squires stripped Valannus of mail shirt, burganet and leg-pieces, and clad him in Conan's armor of black plate-mail, with the vizored salade, and the dark plumes nodding over the wyvern crest. Over all they put the silken surcoat with the royal lion worked in gold upon the breast, and they girt him with a broad gold-buckled belt which supported a jewel-hilted broad-sword in a cloth-of-gold scabbard. While they worked, trumpets clamored outside, arms clanged, and across the river rose a deep-throated roar as squadron after squadron swung into place.

>>212558059
it's been a long time since I read them myself, but I feel like at least half of the time Conan's dragging some (obviously buxom, though rarely amazon) woman around with him to keep her safe

OH MY GOD
HE HAS A FLASHLIGHT

>>212539124
Ranjesh really outdid himself with this one.

>>212558175
Conan wears armor in battle, most the books he's either crawling through a jungle somewhere, or running away from someone on horseback, or escaping a prison cell through underground tunnels, or in some other situation where running around in armor wouldn't make sense for narrative purposes. You're not gonna be running around in a pirate ship, breaking out of a prison cell, or infiltrating a pict camp to assassinate a shaman while wearing full armor.

>>212558156
Ergonomics

>>212558059
>The idea of howard's work and sword and sorcery in general as a world featuring buxom amazon babes and constantly shirtless barbarians is what happens when you don't actually read the original stories
There are buxom babes like Valeria and Belit, and Conan is shirtless a lot (mostly because he keeps getting captured, stripped and then escapes)

>>212558473
But conan wears armor on ship
>He saw a tall powerfully built figure in a black scale-mail hauberk, burnished greaves and a blue-steel helmet from which jutted bull's horns highly polished
Even when he isn't wearing armor he still wears clothes.
In red nails he wears a silk shirt and breeches and in his time as a king he wears medieval clothing like doublets and jupons

>>212531253
>>212531325
There were plans to make a Conan show on Amazon, but it got cancelled for toxic masculinity.

Looks like a fuckign tv movie, WTF LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

Every fantasy tv show looks more cinematic than this, absolutely embarrassing.

>>212534444
sword and sandal genre is pretty shit and usually B movie grade. Conan was a fluke.

>>212557789
ENTER

Did The Asylum make this?
money laundering
tax fraud
anti male propaganda

>>212530740 (OP)
>le revenge for killing my people as a child
HOLY FUCK STOP MAKING THIS STORY

>>212530740 (OP)
Pure dogshit. Even last seasons of Spartacus was looking better then this trash.

>>212530781
This. Where>>212535927
are the boobs? Did they cast a tranny?

>take €1m investment
>return €1m
How the fuck did he earn €500k from you? If anything he lost the time value of his money. You are a larping retard.

>>212563073
Never mind. I now assume the original €1m was income from something else that they are shielding with the film investment. Total tax dodge scam.

>The sheer variety of stories that surrounded Sonja gave Bassett carte blanche to pursue her own vision. “She was a blank canvas,” Bassett says. The one constant was the chain-mail bikini that had helped earn Sonja the title of sexiest woman in comics, according to Comic Buyer’s Guide, in 2011. “It’s preposterous,” says Bassett. “She became a character for prepubescent 13-year-olds that was never accessible beyond.” Bassett grins, sips her cocktail, then quickly self-corrects. “I mean, I loved it!” For the record, Bassett’s Red Sonja is keeping the chain-mail bikini.

>During casting, Millennium reached out to Game of Thrones’ Hannah John-Kamen to play Sonja, but Bassett decided to go with an unknown instead. She chose the Italian American actress and model Matilda Lutz, whose natural sincerity and warmth appealed to Bassett. “She’s a beautiful, feisty, tough, committed young woman who people are going to want to watch,” Bassett says. Lutz, who gained 13 pounds of muscle for the role, says, “Every day it’s either climbing or horseback riding or fighting.” As she understands her, Red Sonja is a “woman alone in the world, trying to survive in a very crazy environment.”

>>212563536
>Bassett’s script, which she rewrote half a dozen times, steers clear of sexual politics and gender. Curious and friendly in person, Bassett also is direct. “I didn’t warm to the previous script, which was much more sexual politics,” she says. “Obviously in my personal life I’m interested in that. But as a storyteller I don’t think it’s interesting.” She also eliminated a key plot point from the original 1985 film: Sonja’s rape by marauding enemies. “I have no interest in fictional women who use [rape] as an engine of motivation,” she says. “It’s not a strong motivation. She’s just a human being in the world of femininity.”

>For all her struggles, Bassett refuses to adopt many of the tenets of trans advocacy. She hasn’t disavowed J.K. Rowling and retains fond memories of reading the Harry Potter books to her children. “I can’t even remember the thing that Rowling said which is ‘bad,’ ” she says, emphasizing the air quotes. In public statements, Bassett has gone further. “Mammalian biology is divided into male and female — it just is!” she told me casually. Mention a term like “non-menstruating humans,” and Bassett rolls her eyes. She knows stances like these will disturb some. “I have friends who’ve been very much upset by what I’ve said publicly,” she says. “But I have no doubt about the biology of it. It’s nonsensical not to have ‘biological woman’ as part of your vocabulary.”

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/breaking-the-curse-red-sonja-1235294594/

>>212563560
>Nu Boyana churns out commercial popcorn pulp with surprising success. “We make a lot of shitty movies,” Yariv says, heading toward the cafe for a lunch prepared in part by three Ukrainian refugees. “We make a lot of good movies, too, but nobody watches them because they’re art movies.” In particular, he loves Septembers of Shiraz, a 2015 feature starring Salma Hayek and Adrien Brody as Iranian Jews caught up in the aftermath of the 1979 revolution, and 2017’s Bullet Head, the story of three generations of a crime family reunited for one last caper involving a dog-fighting ring, with Brody, John Malkovich and Antonio Banderas. “It’s like Cujo meets Reservoir Dogs,” says Yariv. “A very nice movie.”

>He rises to leave the studio. “We’re a factory at the end of the day,” Yariv says. “Our product is movies.” A black car arrives to pick him up. He’s headed to Turkey, where the price of textiles for Nu Boyana’s ever-expanding wardrobe department is 15 times less expensive.

>>212552794
>Solomon
>Soloway

On a scale of BloodRayne II: Deliverance to Conan the Barbarian, this looks like Uwe Boll's In the Name of the King

>>212530740 (OP)
>fake redhead
Any reason they couldn't get an actual ginger?

>>212552794
Goofy ahh names

>>212560558
>did you just misgender our director?!

>>212530740 (OP)
how can it be that nothing came close to conan, even everyone did the same like conan?

>>212560558
face of a boy on a man's body

>>212567271
>how can it be that nothing came close to conan, even everyone did the same like conan?
Well, my ESL friend, Conan just happened at a unique time when they started trying to make spectacles in the 80s that shone like chrome, but with just enough innocence from the earlier decades to be unapologetic and willing to let a masculine hero just be an over-the-top crazy man in a loin cloth and with a sword. Before that era, everything was too fake and prudish. After that era, everything was too fake and prudish.

>>212531458
the first half is solid the other is turdid

>>212530740 (OP)
who the fuck wants to watch this woke version?

>>212530740 (OP)
The Dynamite comics version of Red Sonja sets a pretty low bar, so this looks surprisingly passable and authentic to that version.

I'm sure most of the comments in this thread wanted the stacked muscle-bitch Sonja but that really isn't the historical default for her.

Not enough decapitations in that trailer for my taste. Red Sonja is a very bloody and violent franchise.

>>212531122
Red Sonja's themes and tones are all over the fucking place, anything goes short of guns and combustion engines.

post sonja art that goes hard

she gets naked in the comics, you know
full tits and vag
only rarely, but it does happen

>>212531122
The comic isn't good either. It's basically "how much mileage can we get out of tits in a chainmail bikini?" The answer is: not much.

>>212531695

“ as a fictional woman, I have no interest in fictional women who..”

/fixed