Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride.

But those things cost money and I’m broke

let a guy fuck your wife
let two

Have a negroni. Have two.

>>213009120 (OP)
This sounds all fun but after a week of doing this, I just want to be home, eating the food that doesn't cost a fortune and shitpost on 4chan.

A comfortable life isn't so bad either.

>>213009120 (OP)
>Empty Bloviating Dipshitty Total Bullshit Guy

This is his new name.

Let's be real: the heroin did him in. it messes up your ability to feel pleasure after that. It's like living life in color then having to live the rest of it in black and white.

>Post on a local board tonight. Use a VPN. Make a multi-paragraph schizopost in a mostly dead general. Go to a board you've never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Call him a nigger. Post a frog. Make a shitpost. Make two. Be open to a website where you've seen the exact same bait being posted a dozen times, but respond to it anyway. Crosspost "accidentally". Don't tip the janny. Bring up tranvestites completely unprompted on an unrelated thread. Get your entire country rangebanned. Enjoy the ride.

>>213009223
This is geniunely more healthy than >>213009120 (OP)
Atleast you don't stuff your body with calories and alcohol.

>>213009215
Not really heroin addiction is way overblown. Heroin is still used in UK in clinical settings as an analgesic for fucks sake, it's an opiate like any other, just stronger than morphine weaker than fent. Withdrawal sucks but isn't even lethal, organ toxicity is low, it's a nothingburger compared to ethanol that can literally kill you during withdrawal and is very toxic to all organs.

>>213009215
i recovered from H addiction right before fent hit

3 childhood friends OD'd once it hit the streets

i relapsed on oxy's a few years later and im still recovering but it is very much doable. just a matter of not being a weak retard like anthony bourdain

btw his wife cheated on him with an underage boytoy and he killed himself over it

>>213009120 (OP)
No.
I will wait for my birthday next month and get a burger at the bar.

>>213009120 (OP)
Nah I just order 20x Mc nuggies like always.

>>213009223
kek!

>>213009120 (OP)
Bourdain lived a better life than most people here, and making fun of him is how you all cope with this fact. He was right. He was always right all along.

>>213010136
>Bourdain lived a better life than most people here
Well I don't intend to kill myself anytime soon, so what gives?

>>213010155
He probably just did it because like many adventurous people do, because his body was getting old while his mind and soul were still young. Something like Hunter S Thompson did.

>>213010186
So he was unhappy with his life, order of magnitude more unhappy than i could possibly be with mine. Again, what gives?

Also
>like many adventurous people do
>his body was getting old while his mind and soul were still young
You make it sound like his life's passion was strenuous physical activity. The man wasn't a pro climber or anything like that, he was just sitting on his ass at bars and restaurants with walking in between.

>>213009223

>>213010186
he was an emotional fuckup who coped with having zero life skills by taking alcohol and opioids

i know anon, the TV crew and marketing team made him look really cool, but it was all bullshit

>>213009120 (OP)
I dislike oysters on account of them being gross. I also never tip as it encourages restaurants in shitty third world countries with either no, or an inadequate minimum wage to underpay their staff.

What do I do in this instance?

Lets say I go out to a restaurant tonight. How do I get the cream sauce? Do I ask for the cream sauce? Or is it part of a dish? Do I say "give me the steak with the cream sauce?" And is there more than 1 cream sauce?

>>213010435
cream sauce is code for gay sex, anon.

>>213010365
eat the damn oysters
don't be a jew

>>213010365
>dislike oysters on account of them being gross
I recommend growing up
Not tipping is based though, keep doing that

>>213009246
i laughed

>>213009120 (OP)
I tried a negroni because of this guy, it was fucking revolting, like this guy himself (I always forget his name and I'll leave it like that) pissed into my mouth from beyond the grave. Rot in hell.

>>213009120 (OP)
Why would anyone take advice from some depressed retard?

>>213009223
lmao

>>213009120 (OP)
t. Jeffrey Epstein

>Check in on yourself
Yeah make sure you aren't hanging yourself in a hotel room in France. I know sometimes I forget to do that.

>>213010136
>he was right
>referring to a retard who was depressed who killed himself
You're an even bigger retard than him since you worship some retard just because he was on tv and yapped a lot

>>213009177
you need to be a trust fund hipster like he was to be able to eat 3rd world street food garbage and hang out in dives as a lifestyle

>>213009223
now i understand
thank you anthony bourdainchan

>>213009120 (OP)
>Eat at a national chain restaurant tonight. Get the ketchup. Have a warm pint at 8 o’clock in a mostly full bar. Go somewhere you’ve been before. Ignore someone you think may have something in common with you. Order the steak well-done. Eat a burrito. Have a Shirley Temple. Have one. Be open to a world where you have to understand or agree with the person next to you, but throw a drink in their face anyways. Eat quickly. Don't tip your server. Check in on your enemies. Check in on me. Hate your life.

>>213010136
He was miserable even at the height of his success.

>>213009215
As an addict in a sense you are right but it applies to any opiate at least to me. I've been on Methadone for about a year now and honestly that keeps the colour in my life, keeps me feeling just right but my life isn't a mess like it was when I was on H.

>>213009120 (OP)
Eat out a local tranny tonight. Get his cream sauce. Have a cold cadaver at 4 am in a mostly empty morgue. Go somwhere you've never been. Listen to a black woman talk. Order the penis hard. Smoke a rock. Smoke two. Suck off a rabbi. Have niggeroni. Have four. Leave your ass open to a world that might not understand but will fuck you anyway. Suck fast. Tip your landlord. Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Check please!

>>213012068
kek’d

>>213009223
All its missing is:
>bring up how she's built for bbc, all the time and every time

>>213009120 (OP)
Let your wife have a negroni. Let her have two.

>i'm so much better than you because i watched l'avventura one time

>>213012068
greatest /tv/ thread of all time

>mfw I see someone order a second negroni

>>213012417
can't really do this in an old people's home

>>213009223
Best post of month

>>213009177
People obsessed with travel are almost always broken, depressed weirdos who ironically die alone.

he is kind of a pretentious fuck isnt he

>>213012417
Yjk Clarkson lurks and did this for the memes

What did he fear so much about Switzerland?

>>213012826
what the fuck.

>>213009151

Get a job. Get two. Fuck bitches. Get money.

>>213012516
this. and they come and spill their nonsense like some shithole in indonesia is spiritual mount everest. in fact, the further you need to travel, the more "spiritual and amazing" it is.in reality it's just some oily brownoids having even worse problems, worse culture and worse nature and food.

what (((travelers))) like is the brownoids can't distinguish them from rich tourist, so they enjoy the imperialist attention until they're exposed as poorfags

>>213012826
The Jew is disgusted by something so purely European, so beautiful and perfect causes him to be revulsed.

put a shirt on nigga

>>213009915
why would you lie on the internet retard?

>>213012959
ah yes switzerland. the land of the bankers. that land.

>>213012068
>Check please!
lost it

>>213009120 (OP)
is that a recipe for suicide?

>>213009120 (OP)
the jew fears the mumford & sons motherfucker

i tried a negroni because of this guy. it tasted like shit.

>>213010365
I don't eat oysters or any other animal products either anon. You can sit at my table.

>>213010435
What kind of sauce that isn't creamy

>>213009120 (OP)
How many times do we have to go over this shit? He never said it. Some retard on a forum DID.

>>213009120 (OP)
Date a whore, get cheated on, get cheated on again, kill yourself.

>>213015028
Just looked it up and you're actually right, it was just some fag trying to "do" Bourdain on some lame forum. How does someone find themselves writing like that? It's so nauseating.

>>213015028
It's a mishmash of quotes and things he believed put together as a tribute.

>>213009223
bASED

>>213012093
>>213012388
>>213014363
Thanks anons. Its always nice when someone appreciates one of my posts

>>213009120 (OP)
There is no evidence he said that , its a /tv/ fabrication.

>>213009223
*snap* thats going in my based collection.

>>213012959
This is exactly it. One of the most unfettered moments of Jewish neurosis and ethnophobic wrath I've ever seen was in the first Staircase, the HBO documentary, when Michael Peterson's lawyer went to Germany and saw a parade, then came home to fucking seethe about it. It was the most harmless thing you could imagine, a handful of people tooting horns during a local Volksfest, and he acted like it was the fucking second coming of the SS.

That kike Marc Maron is like that too, just constantly chimping out about Idaho or any other US state that is more than 35% white. Every single podcast.

>>213012516
Yes and they never end up that wiser because of it. They're the same people as before but they treat it as some sort of personality changing wild trip.

If you travel for fun, just say it. But people who base their personalities around travelling are the worst.

>>213012516
Loser projection

>>213009120 (OP)
Eat at a local trattoria tonight. Get the extra pepperoni. Have a twink cock at 4 o'clock behind a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you've never been. Listen to someone you think may be three times younger than you. Get the cock raw. Lick an asshole. Fuck a nigger. Fuck two. Be open to a world where you might understand or agree with the person fucking you, but let them tap it anyways. Cum slowly. Tip your rentboy. Check in on your smartphone. "Stop breaking my balls." Enjoy the suicide.

>>213009120 (OP)
The waitress just brought out a big cup of cream sauce and is looking at me funny, guys what the fuck do I do!?

>>213015028
This makes it ten times funnier

>>213009120 (OP)
>Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways.
The world would be a better places if everyone was like this.

>>213012417
This isn't real right? If it is post youtube link

>>213015028
It gets worse than that. It’s a Facebook post made two days prior.

>>213009120 (OP)
didn't this guy die in prison?

>>213011106
I literally do do that

>>213009223
>unironically do all of this anyway
What the fuck am I doing?

>>213012826
Switzerland is a close-knit society where social responsibility and civic obligation are held to be very important. It's literally anathematic to an American Jewish boomer.

>>213009120 (OP)
Whats wrong with this advice?

>>213009215
That explains RFK Jr

>>213009120 (OP)
I have Autism.

>>213017889
>Be open to a world where you may not understand
He already covered you, Autisticus Maximus.

>>213017853
Nothing wrong with it, but the tone is malicious.

>>213009120 (OP)
>Get the cream sauce
what do I do with it

>>213009120 (OP)
I thought of this quote during the week and literally laughed to myself that this smug, condescending faggot is dead.

>>213017969
jack off with it

>>213009223
10/10

>>213009223
Based

>>213017853
something about this lou reed archetype makes my skin crawl, like a worldly parochialism

>>213015028
>>213017439
This meme has the deepest lore. Make it so much better even.