Thread 213049105

HBO hires you to develop a Morrowind limited series. How do you make it as kino as it can possibly be?

>>213049105 (OP)
Make it an animated anthology series where each episode follows a different protagonist from a unique race in Morrowind with only a thin overarching plotline connecting them.

>>213049105 (OP)
I uninstall and play skyrim(aka a better game) instead

I'd make a series about the First Council war instead

>>213049105 (OP)
Pedro Pascal as the Nerevarine

>>213049105 (OP)
have it be a collaboration with Del Toro and resurrected David Lynch

>>213049336
>Come Nerevar, moon and star, friend or tra— Nerevar, why are you groping Azura?

Cast him.

>>213049388
This, with kirkbride screenwriting or at least consulting/producing.

>>213049105 (OP)
>main character swings his sword 20 times to kill a bug at the beginnning of the game

>>213049455
>it's a "Nerevarine spends 30 minutes running away from a lone cliff racer" episode

>>213049404
>mfw I loot Fargoth's house and then fill it with rat meat.

>>213049404
Danny Devito

A knight and his squire wander from town to town getting involved with the various factions around Morrowind. One episode could be him getting involved with the thieves guild. The next could be the dark brotherhood or even something small/dumb like solving the mystery of a missing gem. Very episodic with little in terms of serialization beyond maybe some of the guild lines take place over multiple episodes (i.e. season 1 episode 1 could be thieves guild part 1, season 3 episode 4 could be thieves guild part 2, etc). Takes place across all of Tamriel and not just Morrowind.

Basically like a fantasy Brisco County or X-files.

Todd Howard cameo

Take an expedition to Tamriel to film it on location

Lots of female nudity and minimal male nudity.

>>213049336
Kevin Spacey as Crassius Curio.

>>213049105 (OP)
Just do Lawrence of Arabia with bugs. And I mean literally. Fucking everything on Vvardenfell is bugs
Transportation? Giant Fleas
Massive Council House structures? Big Dead Crab
Fucking cheese? Ground up fermented bug
Perfume? Literally called "Bug Musk"
Soap? Actually, you know what, don't ask what the soap is made of, you don't wanna know.

I'd do The Real Barenziah 3.5 h biopic with JenCon as Barenziah, both young (digital+mocap, if old hag Sigurney can do it, then Jen too) and old. 18+.

>>213049272
redguard detected

I would make Vivec the pathetic lying weenie he is in the actual game and not some super CHIM god like Kirkbride made up in his head.
Brother was a hermaphroditic hooker that Nerevar took a liking to. He wasn't a motherly warrior and strongest of them all like Almalexia nor was he a genius sorcerer who figured out Dwemer stuff like Sotha Sil.

>>213049603
>the dark brotherhood
you did not play morrowind

>>213050062
Hunter would make an excellent Vivec.

>>213050062
>I would make Vivec the pathetic lying weenie he is in the actual game and not some super CHIM god like Kirkbride made up in his head.
The entire point of Vivec as a character is he's full of shit, why are you mad that you correctly understood the meaning?

>>213049559
dude's up next after ozzy osbourne and hulk hogan

>>213049105 (OP)
By taking the money and running away and spending it all on coke and slavic prostitutes.

I bought Oblivion Remastered because I never played oblivion, yet I never played it. I just feel like playing Skyrim again instead. I guess a whole new elder scrolls world feels like such an undertaking, it's just easier and more relaxing to play the game I already know

>>213049455
>anon doesn't know how to properly build his character
sad, many such cases

>>213050062
Vivec changed history with his pseudo CHIM. So yeah he was originally a backstabbing little shit but in the new reality he never betrayed nerevar. Only Dagoth and the false gods remember the truth.

I know nothing about Morrowind so I will hire some pajeets who definitely know more than me

>>213050236
I rubbed my two braincells together and figure you might mean the years of forum LARPing that really undercut the game and spawned obnoxious MKtards for the next decade and a half, disregard this post I suck cocks.

>>213049404
ryan gosling

>>213050236
>he doesn't know
Kirkbride doesn't believe that he's full of shit. He bought the character's made-up hype.

MC starts the show by constantly jumping everywhere to boost his jump stats

>>213049105 (OP)
Fuck off n’wah

>>213050363
The last episode would be nerevar learning alchemy and cheesing his way to godhood with fortify intelligence potions.

>first season takes place during the oblivion crisis and the immediate years afterwards
>last episode of the season ends with Baar Dau crashing into Vivec City and obliterating Vvardenfell
>second season is about Morrowind being in a state of utter chaos due to infighting and being BTFO'd by the An-Xileel.

>>213049105 (OP)
Blow all the money in a casino. Elder Scrolls lore is too bland to do anything with. Same deal with WoW, and look at how that turned out.

>>213050363
Cast him

>>213049105 (OP)
Add love triangles, immigrants and sex scenes

>>213050452
>>213049620

>>213049105 (OP)
>SUNDER...
>AND KEENING!

a dialogueless Fantasia-style animated film portrayal of the sermons of Vivec interwoven with the main story of the Nerevarine.

>>213049105 (OP)
have a scene where the MC drinks an entire liquor cabinet and massacres the local police

>>213050462
>love triangles
Nerevar/Ayem/Voryn
>immigrants
the Nerevarine
>sex scenes
Vivec wrote erotic fanfic about Molag Bal

They should just adapt Redguard.

>>213050535
so the normal morrowind narrative?

>>213050571
Shut up Todd

>>213050452
Tom Cruise actually bungee jumping and then having his landing edited in

>>213050343
>Kirkbride doesn't believe that he's full of shit
he has never said that

>>213050062
>I would make Vivec the pathetic lying weenie he is
brainletanon, thats literally how MK wrote him

>>213050666
That’s just absolutely awful

>>213050666
Actually happening

>>213050609
>>213050634
He posted on Reddit once saying his cringey trial RP actually happened for real.
He's also posted about how Almalexia would smoke the other two in a god fight before the game's events when they were at their peak, but during the time of the game Vivec would let her her win and magically regenerate somewhere else because CHIM.

He believes the CHIM god Sermon nonsense wholeheartedly. The only reason Vivec isn't complete shit in the game is because someone else actually wrote the character while Kirkbride wrote the Sermons.

>>213050521
S-S-S-SUNDA
AND
K-K-K-KEENING

>>213050666
kek

>>213050666
Actually made me mad for a second, excellent work. Which studio do you work for?

>>213050761
He has never said that Vivec achieved CHIM. If Vivec had CHIM then he wouldn’t have lost his powers after the heart was destroyed

>>213049105 (OP)
Make oblivion instead because it would do better
Yes Sean bean and Patrick Stewart will be in it.

Yes it will be kino.

>>213049404
The Goose
I need him to start making kino again, he thinks he's a comedy actor right now

theres probably like 10% of people on /tv/ who actually played morrowind and less than 5% that beat it and know the plot.

>>213050274
If the game is unplayable unless you do one or two specific builds, it's a shit RPG

>>213050761
ive never heard him say that about the trial. seemed more like the trial was just a fun RP session on some forums and nothing too serious

>>213049404
The obvious choice would be Hunter Schafer but it is too predictable to go with that. So, Elliot Page.

>>213050985
I only know about it from the Dagoth Ur memes.

>>213049105 (OP)
its just The Grey but with a bunch of super racist dark elves trying to survive a crashed silt strider while being hunted by cliff racers

>>213050765
KEK

>>213050191
I hate that weird troon, but yeah, if you shaved his head he'd be a great Vivec
Never happen though, because he's TOTALLY a real woman indistinguishable from an actual woman

>>213050863
>>213051007
>Dude, it totally happened, Azura is completely in-character, if you want to blame anyone blame me everyone does unless they blame Zenimax or Todd Howard or anyone else with face to name to mortgage on a claim, read, get over it or not but seriously.

It would be about the daily life of a netch farmer. I don't respect anyone who thinks there should be a show about the Tribunal, Dagoth Ur, or the Nerevarine. You are intellectual children.

>>213049404
Warwick Davis and the protagonist kills him which leads to the first bounty and prison episode afterwards

>>213049267
Only if the argonian and khajit characters are slaves

Series should be about a young imperial woman who gets enslaved and sold to various masters throughout morrowind. Lots of opportunities for excessive female nudity .

i would literally just remake lynchs dune but make it morrowind themed. would be as weird and incomprehensible as Morrowind era TES.

>>213049267
HOLY BASED

>>213051088
re-read my post you mindless retarded cretin. MK gigahaters are more annoying than MK dickriders these days and no Todd will never read this nor will he ever give you 1 rupee per post.

Can someone explain why duels are legally recognized in Morrowind to get the highest rank in the Legion, but when Ulfric does it everyone pretends like he committed murder for no reason

>>213049105 (OP)
An HBO Elder Scrolls series would've sounded like a nerd's insane fantasy even a decade ago but after the recent successful video game movies and TV shows it doesn't seem that far-fetched

>>213051229
MK is the reason there is so much bizarre woke shit in the lore. His contributions should be retconned

>>213051252
bitch used his voice in a sword fight

>>213051229
>he didn't say he achieved CHIM
>he just said the trial where he had achieved CHIM happened

>>213050452
>WOOOAAAAHHHH HOW DO I TURN THIS SPELL OFF!!
>*SPLAT*
>*khajiit character whimpers and covers eyes with paws*

>>213050521
STILT STRIDER

>>213051252
The island portion of morrowind (forgot the name) is basically a third world shithole that barely recognizes imperial rule while Skyrim is fully integrated into the empire.

>>213049105 (OP)
A story from the beginning how Indoril Nerevar met the Tribunal, fought the dwemer, and his betrayal as an anime

>>213049267
This.

>>213051347
This but with heavy gay undertones between Nerevar and Dagoth.

>>213051296
its a fictional event you fucking retard. do you believe that just because he wrote the sermons that the things mentioned in the sermons actually happened retard? you should read up on this stuff
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myth

>>213050343
>Kirkbride doesn't believe that he's full of shit. He bought the character's made-up hype.
F
O
U
L

M
U
R
D
E
R

No one can play our chad Caius. Maybe Patrick Stewart 30 years ago.

>>213051376
>it totally happened
>uhmm actually he meant that it didn't happen when he said that

this dude always gave me heavy dagoth/vivec vibes and could totally play either of them

We need a VTMB show.

Why is everybody trying to make sense of Kirkbride? Vivec is his self-insert and Vivec both believes and does not believe his lies.

>>213051464
theres no point in talking to you, retard. MK has never said that vivec has FOR A FACT achieved CHIM and that CHIM is even fucking real. all evidence points to MK writing vivec to truly be a liar and a false god being entirely powered by the heart. he talks about foul murder and vivec admits it after putting on his water face. a fun RP session that is obviously not canon, but you can treat it as canon (which is based and why c0da is so cool) if you wish.

>>213051533
>Vivec both believes and does not believe his lies.
literally this. idk how the MK anti-fan isnt understanding this. vivec is literally the concept of duality made manifest. considering every thing he has said and done to always have a parallel

>>213051555
>obviously not canon
Yes, it's not canon in the real lore, but in Kirkbride's retarded head
>IT
>TOTALLY
>HAPPENED

>episode 1
>ambient noise, very eerie
>a montage of a bunch of dead mobs
>kid koala music starts playing in the faint distance, bassin street blues
>the camera is hovering over one of the dagoths lying unconsciously in front of a dwarven door
>we see akulakhan poking out of the lava at mt. doom
>dunmer tom hardy is standing in front of the heart of loknar holding sunder looking miserable
>the narration kicks in "you probably wonder how I got here mate. well, it's a long story..."

>cut to a prison ship
>someone is puking, cliff rather screetch in the background
>tom hardy is sleeping uncomfortably making girly noises while dreaming
>"it all began when I got wrongly accused of a crime I didn't commit."
>cut to a bunch of emperials surrounding a shitfaced hardy lying on the ground covering his eyes from the sun
>a prison door falls shut
>hardy in shackles in front of some imperial judge slamming a hammer down
>straight to bloody morrowind they said. just fuck off, pet a cliff racer for us or something. they didn't even tell me I supposedly did. imperial wankers"
>"you see, only place worse than morrowind is the black marsh - still lots of argonians tho. and kajiit I guess"
>a bunch of kajiits in the process of getting caught smoking moon seguar, they look up in terror
>tom hardy continues to elaborate on morrowind the ancestral home of the dark elves and the sorry state they're in
>montage of different places

>"Ey! Wake up!"
>tom hardy opens his eyes
>shackled tom hardy takes a moment to analyze is surroundings while standing in front of the plank leading into seyda need
>someone pokes him from behind and he starts walking towards the office door
>boom, cut to the title card: MORROWIND

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fw1OtInIF4k

>>213051590
you have yet to show a single instance of MK saying so so why the fuck should i care what you think? you are literally just a schizo trying to read MK's brain

>>213051290
>erm you can't yell at your enemy, chud

>>213049404
michael sera or andrew garfield but midgetized like the hobbits

>>213051608
yep thats kino

So we can all agree this shit can't be live action right. IT HAS TO BE ANIMATED.

Cast her

>>213051715
Emma Watson (no makeup)

>>213050442
What makes it bland?
>>213050521
>>213051328
KINO

>>213049624
Make it about the guy writing the pocket guide to the empire and his travels perhaps. Kirkbride consulting. The "documentary crew" is his team.

>>213051621
https://www.reddit.com/r/teslore/comments/1xo6vh/comment/cfd8z5a/
Now what? You gonna apologize and admit Kirkbride is a tard?

>>213051691
obviously. also needs to be from some obscure soviet director that can truly capture the weirdness of MW. just imagine someone like that with hollywood money

>>213050666
GET YE GONE SATAN

>>213051835
like the office but morrowind?

Realistically, who would be a good Almalexia?

>>213051333
That and Skyrim is 200 years into the future, the Nords barely mention their actual pantheon and instead pray too the Imperial one

Rpvyf

>>213051691
it won't happen because HBO is retarded and will want the GoT audience

It would be about a rag tag group of adventures on a quest to find Vivic because that asteroid or w/e the fuck it is is about to crash down.

>>213051933
Artists always want to make almalexia sexy for some reason.

>>213051969
The success of Cyberpunk: Edgerunners may change some minds

>>213050528
Too kino
>>213051608
Also kino
>>213051865
Not really, more like an actual anthropological documentary attempt to catalog Tamriel and the hijinks and antics that ensue. The author of the pocket guide is the protagonist and similar to Bilbo. He has a "documentary crew" of misfits helping him.

>>213052003
She is meant to be your wife.

Hire Danny DeVito as Dagoth Ur.
Nerevarin as Ryan Gosling.

Dagoth Ur is the only compelling character in the game so I’d make it about him somehow.

>>213051252
>ulfric: “his injustice has gone on long enough! If the high king of skyrim won’t stand up to the empire and the thalmor, then -I- will as the new high king!”
>thorig:”Oh jeez well, why not? Okay, I’ll stand with you Ulfric! Let’s take the fight to the elves!”
>ulfric:”……uhhh actually it makes more practical sense to do the duel anyway heh *shouts torigg to death*”

The skyrim civil war debate is probably one of the greatest IQ filters in modern gaming. It’s the choice of the globohomo empire selling out its own citizens to fulfill its future political goals VS a egotistical power grabber using a moral cause to grab power that’s probably doomed to fail, if he goes through with his promises (he won’t.)
What’s funnier is that 100% neither side will be the canonical victor in TESVI so this whole debate is pointless.

>>213052141
>It’s the choice of the globohomo empire selling out its own citizens to fulfill its future political goals VS a egotistical power grabber using a moral cause to grab power that’s probably doomed to fail

Damn, Todd actually predicted Trump and the state of America

>>213052141
It’s pretty weird how both Skyrim and Morrowind prominently feature ethnonationalist political movements. Feels a bit lazy.

>>213052003
She is as sexy as you could get in-engine, plus she literally has an army of volcel simps. >>213052029 this too

>>213052141
>a moral cause
Reminder that Ulfric lead the massacre of the native Reachmen when their peaceful kingdom they reclaimed in the Reach was about to be recognized as sovereign territory by other provinces.

>>213049404
Elijah Wood

>>213049105 (OP)
Pedro Pascal as Crassius Curio

give Dagoth Ur the Darth Vader treatment by the actor being a buff literal who with Keith David's voice dubbed in

>>213052588
>Pedro playing a character who gives off major gay vibes but is actually the straightest and horniest male in Morrowind (who is also a predator)
Perfect casting

>>213049267
neat

>>213049267
>each vignette has a subtle implication that each character is the nerevarine

>>213050062
Vivec was right tho

>>213052992
>season/series finale is all the previous main characters re-appearing as ghosts in the Cavern of the Incarnate while that one background character who made a cameo in every episode is revealed to be the actual Nerevarine

>>213050666
I wish

>>213053081
The tribunal did nothing wrong. Having living gods was unironically good for the Dunmer people.

Do people actually play the game without the boots of blinding speed or similar enchants?

>>213053150
i did in the 2000s on xbox because i had no idea what the fuck i was doing most of the time, but if you do in current day then you are an actual crazy and retarded person

>>213053150
Yes. Once you get all the stronghold indexes it becomes very easy to travel all over without having to fortify speed.

>>213053128
If the tribunal didn't do what they did, there wouldn't have been a big rock that set off the volcano and the Chimer would still have gold skin and Azura's favor.

>>213049404
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAtc7PCZprs

>>213052992
>>213053088
KINOOOOOOOO

>>213053150
I like to go by boat

>>213053213
Nah that was all Dagoth Ur’s fault. If he hadn’t been a retard the Tribunal would have been able to recharge their god powers indefinitely.

>>213053292
Dagoth was loyal to Nerevar and Azura. He knew the tribunal couldn't be trusted and look what happened.

>>213053399
Yeah he fucked up so badly that he somehow achieved anti-godhood or some shit and went insane as a result.

>>213051000
>unplayable
Sorry that the ROLE-playing game requires you to think and choose your battles instead of immediately handing you a meta build that allows you to face everything

>>213049267
Except the Argonian and Khajiit, both share the same episode. It's about them escaping captivity only to be rescued by the Nerevarine at the end.

>>213051000
I fully randomize my characters and it works out. Any Morrowind character eventually becomes godlike.

walkin around wit my daedric dai-katana 1 shottin fools. yep das kino

>>213052282
Reach"men" had it coming. Falmer too. Hail Kyne.

>>213053613
>Hail Kyne.
Why did Kyne abandon the Nords and let Indoril Nerevar rape their zombie god-king?

>>213049267
>skoomfellas episode
>vampire episode that airs around halloween

Caius Cossades

>>213050666
>satan has the worst opinions
There's a reason you were kicked out of heaven.

>>213050666
You know what...Jack Black isn't the worse choice of Dagoth Ur

>>213053662
>whataboutism
*yawn*

>>213054017
>Vivec

>>213053150
yes, I've only bothered to use those on one playthrough. I love walking and enjoying the scenery, especially with increased draw distance.

>>213051366
>>213050666
>>213051201
Dagoth Ur

Jenna Ortega as Azura

>>213054061
Kyne was thirsty for elf cock and let her shouters get throatfucked by Chimeri spears.

Who would be able to pull off Sotha Sil?

>>213049105 (OP)
You can't it's literally just bugs mushrooms dirt and niggers. And not the cool chad negroes that are the redguards, I mean the shart elves who own slaves and come into skyrim and expect the norss to take care of them in their own cities all the whole being racist to them.

Literally Morrowind has nothing going for it at all. You will never convince me that you can make anything good with that setting.

>>213054666
It has a good story, sans all the woke shit.

>>213049388
>We will never see the David Lynch Morrowind adaptation
He would have legitimately loved it, all the weird shit people say, the mushrooms, the monsters. Fucking hurts bros

>>213054603
Matthew McConaughey

>>213054723
>it has good story
Who would know? It's unplayable.

>>213049267
>Make it an animated anthology series
by queenbee.

>>213049404
>Cast him.
why faggoth?

>>213051000
>give your character a weapon skill
>equip the weapon type that corresponds with said skill
There, I just fixed your character

>>213055088
If I hit something with that weapon it should always hit. It should only miss if the target moves or is out of range.

>>213050521
>ASH ZOMBIE!

>>213055170
retard

>>213055238
I love Morrowind and it's far from unplayable but he's got a point

>>213055170
it's a table top style dice rolling game with a coat of first person paint

>>213052014
How successful was Edgerunners really in the grand scheme of things tho? It's nothing compared to the big live action hit shows

Documentary about religion on the surface, but CHIM deep down.

>>213055313
Did Daggerfall and Arena have the same thing-where you could miss?

>>213049267
>only a thin overarching plotline connecting them
recommend me kino like this guys

>>213051200
>its SKOOM-accino!

>>213050666
you got me mad til i saw pedro's gay ass
9/10 bait

>>213050022
This is good. Also a film adaptation of A Dance in Fire would be kino.

>>213049272
Retard

>>213051252
The games are set centuries apart with different polities and cultures at their focus. Also have others have pointed out, Vardenvell in Morrowind is the ass hinter land of Tamriel with the only place less civilized on the continent would be the depths of Black Marsh.

>>213051000
You're fucking dumb. Being shit at weapons you aren't trained for at the start of the game isn't a shit RPG because people are too dumb to pay attention to game mechanics and just assume "weapon swing equals hit because it shows that but not the underlying mechanics of dodge, fatigue, skill, attack type, etc."

Morrowind's combat system is the best of any Elder Scrolls game and top-tier in video games in general but people are fucking morons and can't see it.

>>213052282
Reachmen deserve the rope