>>213493739 (OP)
>and to any students that wish to take extra classes, we do have access to miraculous devices that allow their user to go backwards in time
>now be careful with these, for ill use can lead to truly disastrous consequences and we honestly can’t be bothered to keep an eye on students using them
>just last week we had three psychotic breakdowns from overwrought students meeting themselves and having an identity crisis, and poor Tyrese passed away after getting it into his head that he could mug himself in the past and have two wands. It was terribly amusing.
>now off to bed. Oh, and don’t think of the fact you’ll be biologically about two years older than all your peers by the end of school. Professor Trelawney has set up a betting pool on someone self harming after realising it and I don’t want to spoil the odds.
>Oh yes, I almost forgot. I have decided to give one of the first-year male students an invisibility cloak. No, I will not be revealing who it is. The female students are wondering right now if their bathrooms, bedrooms, and other private areas are magically protected from male student entry. I can safely assure you, they are not.
