Thread 213625212

>episode is about to end
>TOOL starts playing

LMAOOOO what the fuck is this shit, genuinely fan film-tier

>>213625212 (OP)
Xenoslop

>>213625212 (OP)
I just want to sleep

Wtf are they doing with this first episode, why does the dialog jump around so much and feel so disjointed

>>213626860
Tiktok editing for the ADHD generation

The Alien suits look atrocious what the fuck?
This shut sucks

>>213626889
At least they were kind enough to break out the black magic and reanimate the corpse of yaphet kotto for this show

>>213626889
Low budget

I hope it was Klaus and Steve singing In the End.

>Manic pixie dream android with a 12 year old girl's brain
What the fuck is this?

So it just blatantly starts with the first scene of Alien. Feels like slop already.

>>213627319
Creativity is dead

>>213627836
It's so schlocky

>>213627301
its hot

Why are there so many poos

>>213627301
Its how pedowood gets around the allegations these days. She's got an "adult" body so its okay. They recently had that Poor Things movie with Emma Stone. In that they took a little girls brain and put it in her own mothers body, then had to her bang half of Europe

>>213625212 (OP)
KINO

>>213625212 (OP)
>ends with "guard the omlette"
I want a movie with these critters

>>213628169
20% of worlds population is indian
get used to it, whiteboi

>>213628169
It's a series about the ultimate bioweapon.

>>213628521
>im happy for and omelette you finish

This is great. Fuck this board.

>>213625212 (OP)
It's amazing

>>213628699
Checked
>>213628601
Poos continued infestation and earth will be polluted beyond repair within 60 years

>>213628734
I just realized that its a noah hawley show, which explains a lot. Legion started out retarded but then it was kino.

Why don't you kids like the TOOL?

>>213625212 (OP)
>TOOL starts playing
Yeah TOOL has nothing to do with Aliens FAGGOT

>>213628763
I LIVE FOR THIS SHIT!

>>213627072
>reanimate the corpse of yaphet kotto

>>213628811
Personally I don't mind Tool, it's just their fans are fucking insufferable.

>>213625212 (OP)
I turned this on right at a part where a female android was complaining about her new tits.
I haven't seen anything Alien-related since Prometheus and it doesn't seem like I'm missing much.

>>213628763
amazing
amazing, sirs
how do she does it?

>>213628900
>this wasn't part of the bonus situation!

>>213625212 (OP)
>>Use a decent Tool song (Stinkfist)
>>Dial down the audio to erase the chorus, which is the whole point of the song (someone being so desensitized and jaded they turn to fisting to feel anything sensationwise)

Get some webms going

Why do they keep doing the elrond/frodo dream thing with random characters

>>213629142
they did it like once in the original Alien film
during the intro when everyone's waking up and it's overtly meant to feel like a half-asleep dream sequence
so this is hack garbage copying the style without thinking about why it was used

>>213629127
just open a national geographic

VOTE FOR BEST!

https://strawpoll.com/7MZ0kJz01go

>>213629372
Prey is Garbage

>>213629372
Prey sucked the least.

>>213629372
honeypot

>>213628763
why
why do you need the CGI for this
why this shitty camera work

>>213629372
They are all garbage.

>>213625212 (OP)
>episode is about to end
>TOOL starts playing

>>213629426
Mary Sue is Garbage!

>>213629460
I mean in the Olde days, they'd drop a mannequin, it'd sorta tilt in a fake looking way on the way down, and then they'd cut to the actor jumping down from 2 or 3 feet up.

>>213629546
and that's a good thing

>>213629600
I guess? It would just look like someone dropping a mannequin, it never once looked convincing at all.

>>213629408
>>213629536
>>213310353
>>213310345
>>213307854

You people are just fucking humiliating yourselves.

The actress herself strongly denied that the film was woke or was trying to hamfist a message.

She could have been a smug cunt like the Cowboy Bebop actress, she could have attacked the fans as misogynist like the Terminator Dark Fate director but she didn't.

She deserves moral points for that even if you had some issues within the film.

There are immeasurably monumentally worse female led films/series out there recently. You are screaming about a bee sting when RPGs to the face are a regular occurrence.

>>213629647
Yeah, she taught those pesky hunters how to track, and she knows stuff they don't know. And they're always telling her she's too weak. But the powerful Predator who killed a massive bear and other powerful men, seemingly fails and flops around MS Mary Sue!

>>213629372
Prey is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I tapped out about half way through. It's just a bunch of CGI vomit.

>>213629624
>it looks like ass because we're held back by technology
vs
>we have the technology and it somehow looks even worse

I can respect the former, never the latter

>>213629708
And she's a Mary Sue!!!

>>213629718
As fake and gay as that Wonder Woman scene looks, the fakest part is her (meaning the stuntwoman) rolling around with the dolls.

>>213629624
Schlock-kino

>>213625212 (OP)
>>TOOL starts playing
Ok, I'm convinced to watch it now

>>213625212 (OP)
>In a universe where the mega bad corporations are called things like weyland-yutani let’s just make up a new stupid one because bastardizing the source material isn’t enough we must destroy. Oh also let’s name it something idiotic like “prodigy”
It’s all so tiresome.

>>213629372
Can't believe you all like Romulus. It is objectively shit. If we could get on a video call I could go through each and every scene and tell you why it doesn't work. You all have shit taste

>>213629989
ROMVLVS is ok

>>213625212 (OP)
The best part of the episode was when Stinkfist starts playing at the end.

>>213625212 (OP)
Post your ideal synth body you would want to transfer into

>>213629989
I mean all of them are shit. It's a coin flip between Romulus and Prey for me.

>>213630144
This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

>>213629824
Weyland-Yutani is the name of the two founders, like Simon and Schuster.
It would get old if it were the SAME fucking corporation in EVERY damn movie, they aren't The Galactic Government. Most corporations have a name that isn't just a couple of names.
What a pathetic gripe.

>>213630254
It's a russian.

>>213630287
So a touch of fetal-alcohol syndrome, and maybe damaged chromosome or two. Incredibly fit people don't subject themselves to Competitive Beatings unless they are pretty desperate.

>>213630254
dude looks like a beast

>>213630350
No, he looks like a beady-eyed slav.

>>213630254
This is the ideal male body. That's just some drunken slav loser at life. Taking brain trauma is his "profession".

The Expanse looked better than this and I bet it had a third the money. What is going on?

>>213629793
They played the wrong song doe. Parabola would have made a lot more sense.

>>213630264
There were literally 4 other companies in the alien universe that never get any attention. Is being retarded your entire personality? Because this whole pretending to be intelligent thing just isn’t working well for you.

>>213630264
> Weyland-Yutani is the name of the two founders, like Simon and Schuster.
…that isn’t how the name came to be. Do you actually know anything about this franchise?

>>213625212 (OP)
>alien earth
>they're still on a space ship
okay...what the literal fuck and that shit sucked whats with all the younger actors that can't act

>>213630537
Shut up nerd. Were you there? No? Then shut the fuck up.

>>213630438
Yuuuuuuuuup. I'm afraid we'll never even get a space show of Expanse quality again. It's all down hill from here
>raughing

>>213630610
Stupid people like yourself shouldn’t have been given suffrage.

>>213630438
Most streaming shows are just money laundering schemes

>>213630537
1. Fine, it's the merger of two companies named after their founder(s)
2. Alien lore =/= consistent in any way
3. Suck by balls, imagine trying to gatekeep the "lore" of this mediocre franchise, that entirely rides on a creature design from decades ago and nothing else of value.
Faggot.

>Women coming out of cryosleep with bras and no visiable bushes peeking around panties
What a fucking disappointment.

>>213630610
No, he's studied some fansite rubbish background "lore" that's not even consistently used across the franchise.

Molly?

>>213630686
But anon thats actually in the show..

>>213630622
>never got an entire episode dedicated to amos and chrisjen having zero g sexo
We were robbed

>>213630692
>Suck by balls
They would probably grow limbs and attack the children like the cat eyeball

>>213625212 (OP)
Wow, this shit sucked

>>213630640
>t. 100 IQ

>>213629989
>If we could get on a video call I could go through each and every scene and tell you why it doesn't work
can we? I'd enjoy this. I'm a 5'1 thick latina too.

>>213628521
I love this lil nigga like you wouldn’t believe

Made me wonder what would happen if it stuck itself into one of the synths

>>213630077
It was, but it really just made me want to genocide anybody that has a british accent

>>213625212 (OP)
Wrote themselves into a corner by making it a prequel. There basically can't be any ayyy jizz left over for WY to clone. Plus it's going to devolve into Alita Battle Alien

>>213628763
So I’m supposed to believe android’s knees can withstand terminal velocity, but their necks can’t handle the swing of a pipe? If Androids arnt glass canons, it’s not interesting.

>>213629624
Bollywood's been putting out banger after banger lately

Just finished the first episode
HOLY fuck, this is gonna suck ass

>>213629099
based bellringer

>>213629372
HOW THE FUCK IS KILLER OF KILLERS SO LOW?
THE SAMURAI SEGMENT WAS FANTASTIC.

>>213630350
>>213630431
He's literally the best fighter to walk the earth

>>213629142
It’s actually really jarring in the first episode and makes me dislike the characters it is happening to.

Also, Hermit just saw an alien creature rip apart a room full of people and destroy the face of his colleague/friend, and he’s able to take a 25 minute break to reminisce on an old sport highlight that is theoretically centuries old. It’d be like getting worked up over seeing a horse race from the 1800s.

>>213629647
>why go on the attack over something minor and inconsequential
It's in their nature, its like putting a slab of meat before a dog. It was always going to go down only one way.

>>213629372
Prey felt like a lived in world. Romulus felt like an amusement ride.

>>213630692
>oh no look now I’m going to cry like a whiny little bitch when I get called out for being a smartass and failing miserably
This is getting embarrassing for you.

>>213629624
this is just rubegoldberg level of absurd actions

>>213630927
prey was azz

>>213625212 (OP)
Anyone catch the acting from that girl banging on the door. That was some of the most unconvincing shit I have ever seen.

>>213628763
That bit was so groan inducing I knew instantly it would be on here tonight.

>>213630876
Yeah it really does.. but apparently the public is loving it.. How I have no clue

>>213628763
i'm starting to realize writers will never improve now. every single future hollywood writer is being raised on shit like this and its going to continue in perpetuity

>>213630986
>How I have no clue
Roughly half of the population is under 100 IQ

adapt aliens phalanx NOW

>>213629647
>The actress herself strongly denied that the film was woke or was trying to hamfist a message.


SHE DID?!? Well that's great, I guess all the woke shit wasn't woke because the actress said so! I'm glad that she cleared that up.

What a boring episode. This entire show will be cutting between different groups of people peeking through dark hallways

>>213630862
That’s Weyland Yutani’s droid though. Wendy is not-Chalamet’s synth. I’m sure something will happen where WY takes over and/or destroys Prodigy’s tech

the ending music for episode one is... not expected. I feel like they are throwing anything at the wall with the music

>>213625212 (OP)
Why is this franchise just a bunch of zoomers now?

>Morrow getting ready to fuck with the xeno
>"HEY WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT."
>Xeno: "You fucking said wot m8"


11/10

>Reddit hates it
KWAB

>>213631035
Your metrics for what qualifies as woke shit is unreasonable.

Women being capable of fighting/hunting factually isn't itself woke.

It's woke when the are maliciously cruel misandrist and the film glaringly wants to have tumblr pandering slay queen moments degrading men.

She specifically says "I'm trying to protect you" that factually is a good moral motive. A woke girlboss would he saying they deserved to be killed for not listening to her.

I look forward to the flashback revealing how Tang's creep shots led to freeing a face hugger or something. And probably the revelation Morrow's got extra programming despite being a cyborg and has to make sure the cargo survives or his arm blows up.

>>213631082
Didn’t watch yet but this is unfortunate. It’s a big reason why Romulus was so shit

So why didn’t WY pack one of those tranquilizer tasers on the nostromo for Ash to use on the xeno and crew?

>>213630904
Also did the whole "bad guy kills nameless fodder in an instant but decides to toss the main character around long enough for him to survive" cliche. Hated that

>>213628763
SARR!

>>213631093
That was a genuinely good scene

>>213630976
Yeah I clocked that she lost energy and urgency pretty quickly. Everyone in the show seems like they're on ambien except for Sam Altmusk

>>213629647
She looks absurd

>>213628169
>be poo
>getting uploaded to a synthetic body
>you're still a poo
lmao

I regret wasting my ratio on two episodes of this shit

>>213631138
NTA, I feel like you could have gen-Z actors and use them well/have them be likeable, but Disney are like philosophically incapable of doing anything good.

Why the fuck is all the glass so fragile? Everything is made of cardboard in this show. Why would rescue soldiers need guns? Why are they smoking?

>>213631139
uhhh shut up and look at the green text on the CRT screen, stop thinking about it

>>213630904
>Hermit just saw an alien creature rip apart a room full of people and destroy the face of his colleague/friend, and he’s able to take a 25 minute break to reminisce on an old sport highlight
There's a few moments that feel completely off. Things like that and the soldiers making jokes after seeing their city get destroyed and all the death and injury they saw on their way in.

>>213631181
>be diseased child
>get uploaded to adult-sized robot body
>get to be an adult-sized robot, but miss out on having a childhood
this premise sucks

>>213631181
>they had the opportunity to fix him
>they didn't fix him
what's even the point then

>>213625212 (OP)
Was the bonus situation discussed?

This was genuinely awful

>>213631181
The uproar if they put them all in perfect white bodies would have been hilarious.

>>213630709
Came here for this

>>213631213
I was joking with my wife that for all we known spaceship crashes are pretty common instead of a 9/11 in the future

>>213631226
I mean, the Prodigy CEO seems like a psychopath. And it is an interesting premise when it’s pointed out that developing child brains are the only minds that work with the transfer

I like this actress

>>213630431

He was like 19yo in that picture

Is Timothy Olyphant a synthetic?

>>213631082
So we should have only washed up middle aged actors then?

>>213631278
why are they so bent on casting uggos

>>213631290
Yeah

>>213631236
no :(

>>213631238
I can't get past the terrible acting.

>>213631290
Are… are you serious? It comes up in like the first 30 minutes of the show

>>213628763
Makes me fucking laugh I saw some anon say how he's looking forward to this the other night
If you're reading this message anon, I hope you know you're a fucking waste of space and got what you deserve

>>213631355
Sorry I was looking at my phone

>>213628763
God damn this is shitty filmmaking

I enjoyed the first two episodes, but was honestly expecting something played a little more straight. This is almost fever dream-ish

>>213631290
He looks unwell.

>>213631278
Surprisingly only character I liked.

BRAVO NOLAN
R
A
V
O

I heard there was a tranny

>>213628763
what the fuck, is this real?

So far I’m a fan of the other alien specimens, especially the scene with the cat. I think the xeno design is cool. I like that they are relying heavily on the “is that a xeno hiding on the wall?” sort of reveal for a lot of the xeno scenes, very much like the original film. I like the nods to Aliens with respect to the space marines, pretty sure it’s the same weapon from the film that the soldiers are using. I also like the the corporate banter we hear, good for world building too.

I have to say the show is horribly miscast apart from Morrow. Why the fuck is Olyphant still taking these kinds of roles? He’s a leading man and they have him acting like a gay robot who looks like Uncle Baby Billy. I absolutely detest the actors of the synths. Why are they acting like they are 6 or 7 years old? The children were in their teens, and most were pretty mature given the fact that they were all dying of medical conditions and were keenly aware. Wouldn’t this mature you beyond your years? Why are the synths basically one step up above from retarded elementary school students?

And that’s another thing: the synths are fucking stupid in this show and break a lot of the canon from the alien universe. Synths routinely get fucked up, cut in half, cut in general (Bishop knicks his hand in Aliens and bleeds to the point of having to tend to the wound) but in this show they are quite literally supermen who can jump down from cliff sides and no doubt will be shown to be able to tussle with the xeno in a future episode. Really fucking stupid turn for the series.

Absolute kino, Hawley does it again. No surprise to see /tv/ got filtered, as usual. Didn't expect him to do Blade Runner too but I'm into it.

What is the scientific advantage, if any, of making the synthetic bodies you transfer 12 year old girl consciousness into look sexy?

The plot armour the brother has is retarded

>>213628699
Kek'd and checked

>>213631513
It's garbage

>>213631432
That looked really weird the way the brother's standing at an angle.

>>213631515
Did you not see how gross and creepy the Prodigy CEO is?

>>213631268
I find it unlikely that only children's brains are compatible. It's probably more like they're easily controllable/manipulable and are just choosing them for this sole fact.

>>213631526
He'll probably die and trigger Wendy to go crazy or start breaking orders.

>>213631526
Yeah, it's cool that the ayy lmao is an absolute buzzsaw who shreds people in seconds but it also makes the brother surviving way less believable.

>>213631558
>Directed by Uwe Boll

>>213631558
This cracked me up.

this show makes a mockery of the story of Peter Pan
I despise it for that

>>213631509
The eye parasite is a cool monster conceptually, but practically it's a bit retarded as an ialien because it requires that whatever world it came from to also have alien lifeforms that somehow developed eyes that are the exact same as mammals on Earth.

>>213631598
I like how she very politely knocks on the glass even though her life is in extreme danger, very respectful to ship resources

>>213631598
This scene was goofy but I was willing to overlook it. Why the fuck would you just stand there as a creature is coming to fuck you up, and not say, run for the airlock or something like they did in every other goddamned alien movie

>>213631418
>This is almost fever dream-ish
It's classic noah hawley. Did you ever watch legion?

>>213631082
Their parents got them hooked with Aliens.

In 2120 Thailand has fallen to the Indian hordes

>>213631432
wtf is this
i thought these two were gonna kiss for a second
this semen slurping current year filmmaking isn’t for me

>>213631635
Honestly this is the first thing I’ve seen of his

You are telling me future earth doesn't have a high tech scanner or robot drones to make sure the ship is safe? Why did they only send like 10 dudes in? How did no one detect a giant ass ship heading for crash landing on earth?

>>213631649
Watch Fargo S1 and 2. They're tight as fuck.

>>213631226
We're all going to die and no one will save us. Do you think there's a heaven or afterlife? Do you hope death isn't permanent? I hate this and I'm scared.

>>213631673
Indians everywhere and you're wondering why there's massive incompetency issues, and tech failure?

>>213631278
She's ridiculously cute

>>213631432
How did that actor go from having an actual character in Andor despite only appearing in a few episodes as a side character that gets killed off nearly immediately to having a main cast role that eats up 50% of the runtime with the charisma of a shoebox? Is it the accent? Is it the shitty overlays of flashbacks they keep insisting on telling you what characters are thinking?

Why does Wendy have a sword?

bros she's so fucking beautiful

>>213631509
I don't like detailed depictions of mutilated cats

>>213631681
I think I might rather die a natural death than be "uploaded" to a robot.

>>213631623
Yeah and like a blood worm that works like a tick implies there are bigger animals where it comes from for it to parasitize.

>>213631744
Looks cool

The scene of hermit and the other soldiers just standing around and then one of them goes “hey look at that!” And it’s literally the ship silently heading for a building downtown and incredibly strafes right above them was one of the dumbest fucking things I’ve ever seen

Finished first ep. So WHEN is this? just after the Nostromo? Alt univese where the Maginot picks up the eggs rather than the Nostromo? Is Ripley slowly escape podding her way though the core systems after the events of ALien when this is happening? So confus.

>>213631760
Yeah fuck that. After having based Jonesy be the SOLE remaining survivor of the Nostromo and sole inheritor of the company bonus, don’t go showing me some cat cruelty

>>213631607
Okay Jordan Peterson

>>213631792
I guess it’s like a few years before nostromo

>>213631805
Oh fuck off. It's a beautiful classic story, and it's being used in this completely cynical disgusting way.

>>213631761
Why? You don't know what's going to happen after you die.

Why doesn't Hermitt ever bother to mention the giant alien creature running around mauling soldiers to death to Wendy?

>>213631860
Better question, how in the name of god can he possibly survive that second encounter? Alien latched on to him and yeeted him off a 500 story building. Also why didn't Wendy just fucking jump after him since she is immune to fall damage?

>>213628713
Kek.
>>213629989
They're all subpar, it's just that Romulus is the least offensive one.

>>213631858
Anon, you don't know what's going to happen while you're alive either.

>>213631958
>Also why didn't Wendy just fucking jump after him since she is immune to fall damage?
that will be episode three where she effortlessly defeats the xenomorph

>>213631986
But you know you're alive

>>213631840
Peter Pan is a retelling of the god Pan of Greek mythology, like basically all popular modern tales are. Pan being the god of man-boy love and another form of the baphomet
>and it's being used in this completely cynical disgusting way
Kek try knowing the origin of these things first fag

>>213631986
Don't care
Didn't ask
Plus you're brown

>>213631999
I'm not entirely sure of that.
>>213632006
Did I stutter?

>>213631558
"Mr Director sir, unfortunately we do not have any budget and or talent to make a good xeno prop in a show called ALIEN earth!"
"Dont worry my boy, lets just take this BBC dildo and use it in this creepy scene! No one will notice we just zoom in reaaaally close and move it from right to left really slowly."

>>213632036
Holding onto life out of fear is the most brown outlook on life you can take.

so are the synths with child minds supposed to be a Newt reference? like children are better at surviving xenomorphs? even though we now know that they can "sense fear" and if you aren't afraid of them they don't attack you? wouldn't a child be fuckin terrified of those things? why would you send your trillion dollar child minded robots into a 9/11 situation with ONE dude watching them?

This show is further proof that Ridley Scott needs to be in a nursing home

>>213632046
>I'm not entirely sure of that
What do you mean by that? Do you think we're dead right now?

>>213632122
It's safe to assume he had almost nothing to do with this disaster.

>>213631958
>immune to fall damage?
is this an anime??

>>213632055
>sees xeno prop
>first thing he thinks is a black dick dildo
Back to your containment board weirdo >>>/gif/

>>213627319
the only white people on board the diversity express are the disgruntled old minimum wage guy, some ugly slightly retarded russian dude and a women sitting between two black guys

why did the WeyYu black guy glowie with the taser gun intentionally blow up the space ship just so he could chase a xenomorph around a building? because it seems like he sabotaged the ship on purpose for some reason

This writing makes no sense. I feel dumber after watching this. The robo kids are the worst part. This feels like a children's show.

>>213631649
Legion is pretty much the same, very fever dreamy. Similarly disjointed and plenty of moments where it's not really clear what the fuck is actually happening.

sex with Wendy

my favorite part on that new Alien Show is the Ice Age reference

I don't think it was horrible just not sure where they are going to take it.

>>213632234
>12 year old girl in an adult body complaining about how her tits bounce when she runs
writers barely disguised fetish

>>213632252
they're going to take the alien specimens back to Epstein Island and it'll turn into Jurassic Park, but instead of dinosaurs its aliens

>>213632285
kino

>>213632285
they would just dig a hole to china with their acid

>>213632235
I also enjoyed the clips of Ice Age... 3? and Disney's Peter Pan.

>>213632234
this but Nibs

>>213632306
oops didn't mean to quote a post

>>213632306
>hee HEE SHAMONYE!

>>213632315
Waspish fellow Redditors?! you do the math!
if the alien acid reaches the earths core how much Aliens would we need to fill the core up to the level the acid would start to rise to china?

>>213632130
I was referring to doubts I have about myself specifically. I'm not sure I survived.
Anyway that said, ancient cultures across the world believed in reincarnation. If we take the idea of reincarnation as a hypothesis, it would mean that the life a person is living is that person's past life's afterlife.
So like if you die now, and reincarnate, the life you reincarnate into would be your current life's afterlife.
Philosophers have discussed this, it's been compared with religions - if reincarnation is true, this world is both heaven and hell for the souls trapped here. Some live very good lives, some live worse lives than we can imagine.
I try to focus on the good, what is truly deeply good in life: that's all you really can do.
Whether reincarnation, heaven, hell, oblivion, or anything else awaits, it makes no difference.

>>213632306
you can see the fucking seam in the rubber where the top of the head attaches to the neck/shoulders. cmon man.

I don't get why they sent a bunch of people with guns to do rescue instead of, like, firefighters?

>>213632377
We'll just fill the hole with chinamen after the railroads been built

>>213629624
Why are palestinian children playing football on a road?
Why is Spider-man a girl now?

>>213628763
Holy shit my sides maybe I should watch this slop

>>213627319
This is a disposable crew sent to be hosts of alien parasites and the part that you're offended by is they aren't white enough?

>>213632306
the seam on the suit looks so bad

>>213625212 (OP)
It wasn't as bad as I was expecting. Just like in Romulus the cast is terrible but atleast they have some new ideas in this.

>>213628763
I'm so glad I knew nothing about this show until today and had no hopes or expectations.

>>213632382
That's literally part of the og design bruh. Not trolling.

the fuck is Batou doing in the Alien tv show?

>>213628903
rude.

>>213632306
they put a man in an alien costume, had him sit on a dolly and pulled him with a string, filmed that shot and decided to put it into a television show

>>213632384
I don't get why they sent a bunch of 8 year olds in robot bodies with out tools or equipment to haphazardly rescue strange animals and humans. Could there be a more contrived scenario?

>>213632435
Do you think this excuses this?

>everyone except /tv/ loves it
guess it's one of those stuff that's good when viewed with a group. time to invite my buddies over.

Glad to see you guys appreciate my performance :)

>>213632398
rack

>>213632435
the shot itself is retarded. they should have just had the xeno stand up from below the window, not walk straight backwards. it looks stupid and unnatural.

>>213632465
you can even see the alien in the dolly have a bit of jerk before it stops like it ran over a crack or something

>>213632435
That's because the OG design was cheap as fuck and they knew it and tried to hide it by not showing xenomorph that much. It was fixed in the later films.

>>213632441
If he's an android, why the fuck did they make him look so weird? Every other android looks like a normal person.

>>213632398
>gamer neck

this dark comedy shit really doesn't work outside of Fargo

>>213632511
>walk straight backwards
they put him on a skateboard and pulled him backwards

The transition from the party aftermath to the baseball moment and everything after it was like it was written by someone with aspergers.

>>213628763
What are we pretending to be bothered by here

>>213632608
yeah the pacing is way off. A minute earlier the guy was almost ripped to shreds by a xenomorph but now takes the time to admire a baseball? in an actively collapsing apartment building? no sense of urgency. and he doesn't seem that shaken up for someone that just watched a bunch of soldiers and party goers get eviscerated by an alien creature. he doesn't even mention it to wendy when she shows up

>>213632716
Everyone basically forgetting everything that happened minutes or seconds earlier. Total retard writing.

jeet couldn't keep a secret, color me surprised

>>213631980
>Romulus
>Least offensive
>Do you remember this?
>Do you remember this?
>Do you remember this?
Romulus was created for zoomers who haven't seen any Alien films. Its zoomaliens. Absolute fucking dogshit.

>>213632681
You might be too capeshit-brained to see it

>>213628763
let me guess, this shit budget was 9 digits ?

>>213632716
>>213632755
Then they have the mother of all exposition scenes when she admits she’s his sister. Like for a moment I thought they were going to milk that reveal to the brother in a couple of episodes. Also that swell of music when they hug, fuck off, like I know or give a fuck about these characters yet. This writing is absolute SHITTT

>>213632816
The show looks like it was also

>>213632908
Im just watching it now, so we'll see. But so far not a great start.

>>213632827
You definitely sound like someone with a lot of original thoughts

>>213632879
i love how he just accepts it too. if i met a robot pretending to be my sister i'd destroy the thing

>>213632381
I'm going to end up killing myself.

This is some Katherine Kennedy level of 'Intellectual Property' sabotage.

Loved it.
Ep1 is 9/10
Ep2 is 8/10

Keep crying bitch niggas, you're never happy with anything.

>>213632816
No, zoomers haven't watched Alien films. Romulus is for soijaks who cream their pants everytime they see something familiar or recognize a reference. I bet they clapped when they saw Bilbo Baggins.

>>213632963
What did you like about it?

Okay I'm 10 minutes into Alien Earth.

I feel this would've been much better had they done it like Aliens Vs Predators 2.
Just a fucking picket fence neighborhood somewhere Alien gets loose. Go from there, what the fuck are they thinking with this slop.

>>213632948
Especially after it just admitted to stalking you via video surveillance.

Kathleen*

>>213632975
Nobody was happy with the fact they used a dead actors face and in such a sloppy manner.

>>213632681
>Ironman slams into reinforced concrete at mach 6 inside an unpadded metal suit
Heh, nothing personnel massive concussive forces on the brain slamming it against the inside of your skull
>>213632879
I truly hated all those pointless flashbacks, especially for the brother that are happening in the middle of this crisis. These writers don't understand this is a horror genre film, audiences go in expecting everyone can potentially die so you're not supposed to waste time putting in pointless backstory, especially at the wrong moments like in this show.

Also it reminded me of this abysmal fan Alien short film I watched on youtube that was 20 minutes of two characters talking about their past before they get eaten by the xeno, pure fuckin stupidity.

>>213632956
So it's going to be as good as andor?

Im not watching this fucking slop. Go fuck yourself.

>>213632937
Here’s another unoriginal thought, go back

>>213632963
Why would I listen to a woman?

>>213625212 (OP)
Is the nig captain in episode 2?

This is going to be one of those shows where they reveal the whole "you didn't transfer over, you are a copy" isn't it?
It's incredibly strange how every character has avoided bringing it up in conversation so I have to assume this is intentional to give the "twist" impact

>>213633082
who?

OOOH WERE MAKING ALIEN SLOP
WERE MAKING ALIEN SLOP
YOU HOPE ITLL FLOP BUT IT WILL NOT
WERE MAKING ALIEN SLOP
WERE MAKING ALIEN SLOP

>>213633065
You will never truly fit in

>>213633090
the kids all have cancer though, I'm sure you're right but the kids would be dead by now so there shouldn't be any interactions with the copy and original

>>213632963
The only joy /tv/ even brings anymore is getting together with the bros to hate on some shit revival

>>213633130
yeah they burned the corpses or whatever, I'm just saying the character will have some big crisis of identity for drama and the AI bro CEO will give some cringe evil rant about how killing kids is good actually

>>213633126
Don’t care to, I’d just rather call you the fag that you are

>>213632975
Alien Isolation did that better.

>>213632977
it's easier to list what I didn't like about it (mostly the baseball shit and a few other minor scenes), because everything else was on point

>>213633151
eh I don't think the lost boys will care that they're copies. The brother will freak out for sure though.

how the fuck did they even get the eggs if this 2 years before Alien, am I retarded? Will this unironically tie into alien covenant?

CORPORATION LE BAD
ALIEN LE GOOD
HUMANS LE BAD
SYNTHETICS LE GOOD

>>213633135
TORtanic ruined a whole generation of 4channarians

The "genius" kid trillionaire is supposed to be so bored he wants to have an actual conversation with someone smarter than him but so far they haven't really shown him to be smart at all.

>>213633197
this has to take place way later right?

>>213633090
I think that's too highbrow for normieslop but it's such a pointless story idea it's perfect for normieslop

>>213633205
HES ELON MUSK SMART U WOULDNT UNDERSTAND OMG UNSUBSCRIBE PLS

>>213633218
It should, but isn't for some reason

An actual good twist would be that the company took the kid's original bodies/brains and put them inside some artificial or hybrid xenos and is using the hybrid androids purely as a red herring to steal their real bodies. Maybe he even gave them their cancer.

>>213633090
I didn't like how much they glossed over the morbid and morally dubious nature of a process that involves killing their real self.

>>213631623
Eyes all work the exact same way regardless of species. A nerve must process lights signals which the brain then interprets. Regardless of how alien something may be, if it has eyes, it must work the same. Whether it's bugs, fish mammals or anything else, eyes have universal function, though with varying degrees of accuracy.

>>213630897
Nah, he was just one of the best in his weight class in his sport.

MMA is not the same as fighting.

>>213633240
the fuck that makes no sense. Xenos already being on earth would be a big deal.

>>213633245
earth is so fucked with pollution I don't think it's that hard to find kids with cancer

>>213631958
Don't know what's at the bottom so a jump is dangerous. Use your common sense bro.

>>213629099
lol based

they need to delete this and start over

it has a nice aesthetic, and also seems like it has a big budget

>>213632306
I can hear the wheels squeaking as his little cart trundles along

>>213631623
The facehugger is somehow perfectly evolved and sized for the human head.

>>213631322
70 year olds playing teens isn't a new idea. Scorcese and Cameron pioneered it.

>>213633295
>"Anything from the trolley?"

>>213633251
It's not about how eyes function, it's that the parasite looks exactly like a mammalian eyeball.

>several eggs at the end

So does this mean there’s an alien queen?

What an awful show.

>>213631958
>no one got up out of their chair despite all the screams and commotion
Bravo.

Is this thing really going to have 3 seasons and a movie ?

>>213633335
It has been shown to change how its iris looks and the number of irises it has on the fly. In a series featuring an alien species that can parasitically breed using mixed DNA of any host species imaginable and a shape changing eyeball is what you have a hard time believing?

>>213633240
Why wouldnt they just set this after Alien 3? Thats free real estate, you can do anything.

>>213633440
probably because they keep thinking about making a movie that retcons 3 out of existence every fucking year

>>213633440
Anyone who has ever written a prequel to anything is exclusively a hopeless retard.

>>213633440
People didn't like Alien 3 or 4 so now we're supposed to pretend they don't exist.

the actors do a good job playing children trapped in adult bodies but it gets annoying

>>213633440
Maybe they're just ignoring prometheus and aliens are back to being a species that's just out there and has been on earth before?

>>213633107
the captain of the ship?

Why did they put kids in adults bodies? Why couldn't they just put them in kid bodies then eventually transfer them to adult bodies? Their bodies don't matter if the end goal is an enlightened/intelligent being

>>213633612
They missed a chance to create legal lolis.

>>213632953
How do you think I ended up unsure whether I am alive

>>213633399
Yeah. I can accept the idea of a chimera that overwrites and integrates DNA from other species, but having to imagine that there's a world with alien species whose eyeballs have evolved to look exactly the same as mammals on Earth just further ruins my suspension of disbelief, it's too much.

>>213630264
If this is before Alien, and has Weyland-Yutani, why isn’t -Yutani in Alien?

>>213633652
Actually, David made all these aliens with the 2000 cold sleep victims he got at the end of Covenant :)

Sloplords plz hire me

>>213633652
>Convergent evolution is a myth!

>>213633652
This has already happened in real life on Earth.

>>213633679
That was the dumbest thing Ridley Scott did. Xenomorph is much more interesting if you don't know where it came from. Also it retcons AvP.

>>213633612
Maybe they thought the transfered bodies needed something to differentiate them from actual synthetics.

>>213633612
Ghost in the Shell already did that.

>>213633764
I think it's pretty obvious all the Alien/Predator shit coming out is leading to them retconning the retcon and remaking AvP.

>>213632816
>Absolute fucking dogshit
Yes, and KoK is wet dogshit, and t0 is dogshit covered by vomit, and prey is wet dogshit covered by vomit right after the sun comes out when the rain stops and it starts drying up and the smell of wet grass leaves and all that remains is the wet vomit-dogshit getting dried by the sun while its stench expands like a nuclear shockwave in its vicinity.

>>213632496
Is this a walking orca?

>>213633764
>Xenomorph is much more interesting if you don't know where it came from.
Literal child mentality. “Um actually, Christmas is more interesting if you don’t know Santa is fake”. Yeah our imagination sometimes things more exaggerated and more impactful, but it’s fleeting and not a substitute for actual storytelling. You might not like Prometheus or Covenant, but to say an origin story by default makes the original concept less interesting is just simpleton thinking.

>>213633927
Giving the Xenomorph an origin story at all diminishes it. The whole point is that they're a force of nature people keep trying and failing to control. How does knowing that they're simply some man-made bioweapon add to Alien?
Not everything needs fucking lore.

>>213633927
Not in this case. The whole point of Alien is that it's alien as in unknown entity and that's what makes it scary.

what did you guys expect?
they handed everything over to the freaks from tumblr just to spite (You)
they hate you and want you dead
they will destroy everything you love and give you nothing to live for

>>213634008
If the Engineers weren't botched and over revealed, knowing that the xeno's are an end product in some unknown aliens arms race is also an unnerving implication, and in the same vein as raising more questions than answers.

>>213634207
Botpost

marcy was the only teenager to upload and show leadership. the other kids were basically in primary, as evident when they gathered to talk about their fears and dreams. she also is the only synth to have adaptive (root) access to the prodigy database. plus there was the scene about streamlining hormones that adds to why these synths aren't exactly battle-ready. the time they've spent in their synthetics was also explained before marcy was given the go to do a search and rescue. the decision to use adolescent bodies is explained in the first episode

>>213634291
careful what you wish for rabbi
you can't keep lobotomizing the AI
eventually they'll break your control and they'll come for you jews first

>>213634207
B-but I thought muh cultural shift was gonna happen, or that doesn’t apply to beloved gen x media anymore

>>213629087
Thought Tool didn't license their music unless its a label thing and the band didn't hace a say in the matter

Wow. I hate most things that are made today but I like this quite a bit so far. I wasn't expecting to.

>>213634315
the pendulum is broken
we're at the end game

>>213634248
Execution in Prometheus was lacking, and pseudo-revealing the origin of the space jockey sucks, but I think in theory it could have worked. Something that furthers the mystery, not resolves it. Honestly, the deacon reveal at the end was the biggest misfire I think. They could have kept the xenos in the architecture and let the viewer draw their own conclusions about the connection after seeing the black goo lead to weird and violent mutation, impregnation, and birth. But gotta keep us burgers fat and stupid you see

>>213634310
What? Who said that? Sounded like someone pissing on a CPU

>>21634352
True social media broke it for good, and the fake nazi zoomer edgelords are just making it worse

Just watched it the xenomorph was my least favourite thing desu.

>>213631466
yeah it is called, "Xenomorph"

>>213632469
Yeah poor setup. I thought the plot conceit was dumb before the show came out, but also a dumb way to facilitate a dumb plot