Thread 213657703

>Christopher, my son, I will die soon
>Make sure that when video games are made of my work, that Shelob is turned into a hot goth chick who's not evil
>And make sure that when Amazon makes a prequel TV series, that Galadriel is a hot backflipping ninja
>Make sure it's all very multiracial aswell
>Ahhhhhh

Yeah, stoya was a 10/10

>>213657703 (OP)
Milla Jovovich if she vidya

>>213657880
>Do not fuck the spider! Suffer your erections, now!

>>213659371
That would be BloodRayne.

all memes aside, the hot goth spider chick was a pretty kino part of the game

>>213657703 (OP)
Wasn't his wife a hot goth chick?

>>213661127
Whose wife isn't?

>>213659776
Im going to have to fuck the spider

I've never met a cool person who cared if things were faithful to the source material. Every person I've ever met who complained about that kind of shit was someone who I didn't want to be around for a moment longer than necessary.

Fuck ROP

why didn't Shelob turn into Stoya and lure Frodo into her lair like that?

>>213661127
How can someone from the early 20th be a goth?

>>213661127
He called his wife his Luthien and said she used to dance and sing in the flowers with raven hair and enchanted him but in every photo of her that exists she's just a frumpy old woman in unflattering old lady clothes who looks exactly like you'd expect an old woman named Edith to look

>>213664076
The absolute state of current year. I wish I could fall in love like Tolkien did

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3AZYQh2e0k
remember when shadow of mordor was considered the greatest offense to the lore? good times

>>213664223
shocked by the accurate pronunciation of hæðe ecge

>>213664223
It wasn't even that much of a stretch. Shelob was never just a spider to begin with. Spiders aren't armored like crabs or have giraffe sized necks.

>>213657703 (OP)
how deliciously subversive

>>213664430
You know there's a world of difference between mutant spider and HOT GOTH BITCH play acting as Cersei

>>213661172
i dont have a wife

>>213664430
>t. amazon writer

>>213659776
DEEPEEST LORE. As some spider-venoms can actually cause erections.

>>213664430
>Spiders aren't armored like crabs or have giraffe sized necks.

>encounter giant spider
>shine your phial of galadriel on it
>light illuminates pic related on the ground
>she says your intrusion into her lair simply scared her and she's powerless before the light and begs mercy from you

WDYD?

>>213666208
Ask her
>what have I got in my pocket?

>>213666208
Treat her like James Deen did.

>>213657703 (OP)
To be fair, Tolkien defended that Galadriel was a badass fighter in her youth

>>213666656
She deserved it.

>>213657703 (OP)
Dark souls did it better. She shouldn’t be wearing clothes.

>>213657703 (OP)
This character is not canonical.

>>213657703 (OP)
>Ahhhhhh
what happened there?

Just put the fries in the bag Tolkien.

this but for fallout and making the protagonist love a black guy