Thread 213889966

>shows up to work late everyday
>shows up to crime scene late
>”theres no blood here can I go? Personal matter”
>”hey LT can I leave? I got a personal matter to attend to”
>leaves
>”hey dex where were you?”
>”i was … fishing”
>where’s dexter? Cant find him
>shows up after 72hrs
>”sorry I had a personal matter to attend to”
>”hey sarge can I leave? Got something to attend to”

how the fuck was he never fired?

His twin was covering for him.

>>213889966 (OP)
As long as he was solving their cases they would keep him. That's all police care about.

And he was bringing donuts.

>>213889966 (OP)
He was very good at his job and brought everybody free donuts

the cop's main weakness

>>213889966 (OP)
He played the social game. Ass kissing and fraternization go a long way at work.

>>213889966 (OP)
He wasn’t a constant liability like most of Miami Metro Homicide so he was a golden boy compared to fucks like Angel.

All of the above plus LaGuerta had a crush on him

>>213889966 (OP)
Because when he did work, he was very good at his job

He still did all the paperwork off-screen

>>213889966 (OP)
Once you reach a certain level in ANY career hierarchy you can do this.

His twin buy donuts and good at job

Government job. Its easy to goof off and never get fired.
t.work for government and often just dont bother turning up

>>213889966 (OP)
He’s literally me. My bosses don’t give a shit about me being late, leaving early, or taking a bunch of smoke breaks because I get my job done.

>>213890419
cringe faggot. go type your sentences on reddit where you belong

They all know he's autistic and that they could get in trouble for firing a mentally handicapped man.

>>213889966 (OP)
>Rewatching the first season
>Most of the Doakes content is him getting dunked on
I kinda forgot that no one actually seemed to treat him with respect

>>213889966 (OP)
Popo lab rat here, my work is similar to his. When there's a case you get super busy but 80% of the time you're just sitting around playing video games. They just pay you for the 20% when they really need a nerd around.

>>213890462
I seethe reading this as im a scientist in big pharma and have extremely stressful constant work job with zero downtime.

>>213890462
what do you make, salarywise?

>>213890458
Doakes was right on many things but as a coworker he was probably a huge pain in the ass

>>213889966 (OP)
He was a government employee and did his job more than 33% of the time so he was unfireable.

>>213890458
the stuff with him taking Deb under his wing was pretty good

you just can't say no to a man with a perfectly chiseled chin

>>213889966 (OP)
Only one who noticed that bullshit from him early now, and pretty much totally figured him out was Doakes.

>>213889966 (OP)
Only one who noticed that bullshit from Dexter early on and figured him out was Doakes.

>>213889966 (OP)
Miami Metro is the shortbus for the Miami police department

Literally impossible to get fired from government job unless you do something insane like murder someone or rape someone.

>>213889966 (OP)
I did this shit all the time at work, just like Dexter just be cool with your coworkers and they won't give a fuck what you do.

>>213889966 (OP)
yeah i do that shit at my office
they dgaf cause i get the job done

I think of myself more as a contractor hired for specific tasks, and the ‘rules’ are to manage people’s delusions
Just to head off the arguments from idiots: we have people with perfect attendance who don’t accomplish jack shit. Hire them.

Dexter could've been a detective easily, if he wasn't constantly holding back information from the police so he could kill them himself he could've rose to the top.

>>213889966 (OP)
Quinn was the only one who was on his ass about it. Wondering what the fuck he was doing that was so important he could never just be at work and do his job. It's what almost got him caught until Dex kills the cop Quinn hired to get dirt on him.

I find it amusing when tv shows and movies make out lab people to be geeks and nerds. I did Biomedical Science in college and 90% of the people in my class were turbo normies who went partying and drinking and sexing every night. They certainly werent geeky.

>>213889966 (OP)
the 00s were a different time, back when things werent total shit so you could get away with a lot of crap
basically between the 90s and 2012 you could get away with a lot of shit because it was 'good times' + the slow transitioning of everything going digital + smartphones

cant say in a post-smartphone post-GPS apple cloud itag bullshit era, you can be tracked everywhere and cant 'go off the grid' nor have easy excuses with everyone having a camera in their pocket / wanting to be Marked as Read on their texts

sex with deb

>>213892143
as Dexter

>>213890435
>complains about reddit about a reddit soap opera
LoL

>>213889966 (OP)
You would think after all of these years lying to his family/babysitters about having to work late while simultaneously lying to his coworkers about needing to leave early would blow up in his face one day if they actually just talked to each other about his schedule for once

>>213892810
Americans, do chinese takeouts really come in boxes like these?

>>213893255
some stuff like rice still does but now most entrees come in those flat plastic ones

>>213889966 (OP)
Because he's good but yeah especially once he has a baby it's absurd

>>213890737
Well I mean, he did do that

>>213889966 (OP)
It’s called having talent. Dexter was good at his job. Most of you THINK you are good at your job, but you aren’t, you are probably mid at best. When you are actually good you can do whatever you want more or less.

>kills at night
>chops up bodies then transports back to boat
>starts up boat engines at 1am every week
>dumps bodies
>oh hey rita lmao
>work next day

>>213893375
https://youtu.be/gQyI-9xcoBE

Masuka was so bad at the job they needed someone competent. That s5 gaff when he said those two guys killed each other during kinky sex was wild

>>213893255
Where are you from they don't have those?

>>213890251
This. If you're a nice person, suck up and bring food you can quarter ass your job and most people will let you get away with it.

>>213893044
>that image
Kek, how did I never realise how over half if Dexter's genius sleuthing is just him googling shit on the police database

tonite's the night

bloated enchilada chief bout to get no capped fr fr

>>213893477
>Where are you from they don't have those?
I am absolutely sure those cube thingies is solely an American thing. Especially the phony ass chinky script font, that's like a major red flag that it is anything but authentic chinese food. In real countries, we have these takeout boxes, they used to be styrofoam but I see more plastic ones now.

>>213893763
Damn, I want that in my ass.

>>213893763
Those are widely used in America too, and not just for Chinese food.

>>213893643
Then my man Quinn steps up to the plate to take down Dexter!

>>213893255
Some places do, but the reason its a TV trope is it prevents the actors from having to eat actual food and helps with continuity by hiding the contents

>>213890111
He wasn’t, he was intentionally fucking up cases so he could kill people

>>213893763
Nah we have them in Australia. Chinese food exclusively comes in a cube box.

>>213893917
>it prevents the actors from having to eat actual food and helps with continuity by hiding the contents
big brain, I kneel, hollywood

>>213889966 (OP)
>how the fuck was he never fired?

He was very good at his job. That stated it several times

>>213893995
I'm australian, all the chinese takeaway I see is in rounded rectangular containers, they used to be plastic but now they are compostable wax cardboard

>>213894048
Yeah I was kinda exaggerating but Noodlebox for example comes in a cube.

>>213889966 (OP)
literally every job has at least a small handful of "it's always something" people (just look at this thread) who are either late, absent or leaving early 80% of the time and don't get fired because it takes too much time and effort, but are quietly despised by their coworkers who only put up with it for the sake of peace and quiet

>>213894106
oh yeah noodlebox is the one place that I've seen with the cube boxes

>>213894117
>loved by my coworkers
>good at my job
>leave early because it only takes me 4 hours to do what it takes others 8 to do

>>213890208
>>213890251
These plus in government work people really rarely care if you fuck off especially when it doesn't effect you personally

>>213890458
He's a dickhead. I've known guys who are super good at their job on every level but they were so unlikable so no one wants to work with them or promote them

>>213893643
>woop woop woop woop woop
I can't even look at this guy without hearing his leitmotif from Oz

>>213894117
>who are either late, absent or leaving early 80% of the time and don't get fired because it takes too much time and effort, but are quietly despised by their coworkers who only put up with it for the sake of peace and quiet
80% is an exageration but yeah these peole exist in every workplace especially when you're salary or government
or like me salary and government

>>213889966 (OP)
eyyy you want a Cubano hermano?

Is Dexter actually good and worth watching?

>>213894217
Holy fuck I didn't realize it was him (just started dexter)

>>213894290
S1 and 2 are solid but don't expect prestige hbo drama

>>213893375
What is it with you and rape? No ones raping anyone.

>>213890437
Similar reason why we couldn't get rid of the "minority" that worked in my office.

>>213890462
Do you have a twin too?

>>213893763
>a major red flag that it is anything but authentic
shut up cunt

>>213889966 (OP)
Dexter has hypnosis powers that have never been revealed to the viewer.

>>213889966 (OP)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXtAVMKeNZk

>>213894287
>dexter's donuts
happyness
>batista's cubano sandwich
diabetes

clever symbolism right there, the writers of dexter never cease to amaze me

>>213894602
>dexter can hypnotize people
>harrison can time travel
>harrifather can project his spirit
truly an amazing family

>>213889966 (OP)
I'm a network engineer and me and literally everyone on our team does this
We effectively make our own schedules, but as long as things are done by the deadline, the higher ups do not care

>>213895597
This is how all jobs except retail and military/security should work (for the most part, there are of course exceptions).

Rewatching the show, it’s weird how they keep flip-flopping on Dexter's motivations to keep him as a "nice serial killer." The character makes way more sense as a vigilante emotionally stunted by childhood trauma but they keep flirting with "the dark passenger" and his compulsive urges without ever digging into it. Wanting to follow a code already shows too much self-awareness and empathy from Dexter. Real life serial killers are driven by impulse and compulsion and enjoy crossing boundaries. Breaking that code would only make it more transgressive and thrilling for them. These two archetypes are just inherently contradictory.

>>213889966 (OP)
he was a nepo baby

Isn't Miami like 10% White IRL?

>>213896089
In the TV show The Dark Passenger is just the urge you get before you masturbate. It's a self-control thing.
In the book it's literally Moloch tho.

>yeah, that's right you little freak
>probably thinking about killing right now
>aren't you
>huh?
>what was that you little psycho?
>no, you're a lost cause
>you should probably go kill someone right now because that's what you want anyways
>freak

>>213896389
Yeah, I get the appeal but it really makes no sense based on real life serial killer profiles. Leaning more into a god complex and wanting to punish criminals would've made more sense.

>>213890332
This. In retrospect, it would have been so easy to have a 45-second voiceover in the first few episodes where Dex establishes that he's so good at his work that he's always on top of caseload with plenty of time to spare. Unrealistic in a data-production laboratory scenario (t. works in one), but who cares

>>213893044
This eventually happened big time in Season 7 when Deb asked the babysitter Dexter's schedule. And a few times Rita caught Dexter lying about working late.

I haven't watched the new show yet but how much of the bingo card have we already filled in?
>Dexter starts to doubt Harry's code again
>"Tonight's the night"
>Dexter meets a fellow serial killer and wonders if he can finally share his "dark passenger with them"
>it turns out he can't
>he goes back to listening to Harry's code

how am I batting, 4/5?

>>213896911
Women just think you're having an affair not that you're a secret serial killer.

>>213897005
>Uhhhh....I'm addicted to drugs?
quick thinking dex

>>213897005
Well, Rita was right about that. But lying to the babysitter was one of the things that tipped Deb off in the end.

>government worker
>fired

LOL

>>213891316
To writers, a STEM major is a nerd. To actual researchers, anyone without a PhD or on their way to one is either cheap labor that fucks everything up or an annoying responsibility. That includes the 4.0 STEM majors.

>>213897050
not to mention his dad was Miami Metro royalty and he was close personal friends with everybody in the department

besides, they can't afford to lose Dexter, he's the only person in that whole precinct who was actually good at his job
do you remember in Season 1 when they talk about the case-solve rate of their department?
18%
18 fucking percent
82% of all homicides in miami went completely unsolved by those incompetent fucktards

>>213894290
It's fun until it's not.

>>213893965
But they didn't know that. And he didn't do that with every case.

>>213894290
The first 4 seasons are good
after that it goes downhill fast but you might be invested enough to slog through it
New Blood is terrible
the flashback season is pointless filler

the new show is OK so far

>>213894750
>me dancing after I killed your wife

>>213896975
more like a 2/5

>>213896423
He did try to help most of the time. But when he told Dex to lie to the psychologist it was over. Like he could've just gotten him real help and maybe been a real human bean. But instead he just fucked the kid over for no real reason

>>213897047
It was Rita who first assumed Dexter was hiding an addiction and Dexter just went with it. She couldn't reconcile Dexter hitting Paul on an impulse and also having ready heroin, so instead of concluding it was pre-meditated, she thought she had just attracted another junkie loser. After season 2, she basically forgets the whole thing and even when he acts super flaky right before their wedding, she doesn't bring up addiction again. And thank fucking God for that. Only good thing that came out of the addiction plotline was Doakes catching him at a meeting.

>>213897168
give it time

>>213897110
Dexter could make that percentage higher if he told the cops about all the info he gathers about people he kills. Lundy called him out on his sloppy bloodwork one time after he deliberately changed it to lie.

>>213897110
They were busy fucking each other and uh....
Being brown I guess?

>>213897228
I just feel bad for Doakes
If they had any balls they'd bring in Cyber-Doakes

>>213897244
Dexter could've easily bumped it to like 40% but not to an actual good rating since most of his info was illegally obtained

>>213897228
Paul in general is so weird because he's first mentioned as raping Rita and then everything just sort of glosses over it to focus on the other abuse

>>213897228
Rita was the worst character and I'm so glad they killed her off
but then they brought in Lumen and it was just as bad

I don't know why they kept going back to the well of
>Can I tell THIS person my deep dark secret?
over and over again, every fucking season

>>213897244
not just that but the sal price one too
>uhh... well I just phoned it in because it was a closed case haha

>>213897299
That isn't weird at all if you've ever met someone in those situations. W*men are literally retarded children and just accept that as part of life. They get raped and the everliving shit beaten out of them but he said sorry or she forgave him so it's fine now.

>>213897260
>I just feel bad for Doakes
It's especially fucked up since in Season 2, he lets up on Dexter early on when he thinks the big secret is being an addict. Then he spends the middle of the season doing his own thing. And then in the final third, he spends practically all his time in a shitty cage only to be killed by fucking Britbitch. Doakes deserved SO much better.

>>213897244
call it headcanon or just a fan theory but I'm pretty sure Lundy knew or at least heavily suspected that Dexter was the Bay Harbor Butcher, and simply never brought it up or pressed him on it
likely because he understood and agreed with what Dexter was doing

>>213897228
>she doesn't bring up addiction again
she literally brings it up to sil in season 3

>>213897353
There is zero indication Grundy has the slightest clue. He thought Doakes may not have been it, big no clue who was.

>new season/show
>Dex moves in with that family in their basement
>their daughter shows him the little hidden cubby in the wall where she hides/used to hide her weed (she still keeps stuff in there sometimes)
>later dexter is looking for a place to hide his blood slides, the only evidence that could possibly sink him and ruin everything
>he hides it in the daughter's weed-cubby
>where she still regularly hides things
brava dexter
genius

how about you take your retarded ass to rent a safe deposit box under a different name or something
literally hide them anywhere else

>>213894290
its not a good show from every objective
the plots are retarded and the characters all act like there's a gas leak nearby most of the time
but from the standpoint of tone and "vibe", there's nothing quite like it
it's both comfy and exciting at the same time
dexter is the most autistic fucking retard weirdo but somehow you'll still find him relatable
nothing else feels quite the same

>>213897353
>dood lundy knew

>>213897389
I think there's plenty of indication just from how he treats dexter and acts and talks to him
but I did preface by saying it's probably just headcanon or an offbase fan theory

it just looked that way to me
>>213897432
he knew

>>213897047
That whole thing was so ridiculous. Finally gets to Deb
>Dex? He threw out all my friends joints at this party he wasn't invited to then threatened to call the cops

>>213897353
Lundy was 100% against extra-legal killings even when some of the other cops said they half-way didn't want to catch the butcher. He also clearly never suspected Dexter considering how much he leaned on him during the investigation and gave Dex plenty of chances for sabotage. But he really was against Doakes as the suspect until the end.

If Dexter ever gets tried for being the BHB it will be a nightmare for Miami Metro, they'll have to re-open every single case he ever touched while he was working there and that's in the thousands.

>>213897126
He did that with most cases, there was a plot point about it

>>213896856
they literally couldve done the Scrubs joke where the lab techs have convinced the doctors every test takes like 10x as long than it really does

>>213894290
season 1 is my favorite show of all time. The rest are essentially just over the top parodies of the first season but are fun most of the time

>>213897431
the best review of Dexter I've ever heard was exactly as follows:
>It's okay. You can watch it. It's a watchable show. If you watch it, you'll be OK.

>>213897228
I'll still never understand how or why she forgave Dexter for cheating on her like that with Lila. Or how anyone OK'd that Deb/Lundy bullshit.

>>213897353
He hadn't gotten there yet

>>213897468
I really believe the only way to properly end the series is a Trial of Dexter Morgan miniseries or movie or whatever
Just one long courtroom drama trial where everything gets aired out and all comes to light for all the characters that are still alive/involved

I think the new season is showing that on some level he's the same as any other serial killer and deep down kind of wants to get caught. Part of him craves being able to show his face, say his name, and declare "Yes I am the Bay Harbor Butcher"

t-5 minutes.

Rita is my favorite character.

>>213897530
Deb and Lundy was pretty realistic though, she had massive daddy issues and he was kind of a silver fox who really put the moves on her quite smoothly

>>213890462
You throwing off chopped up corpses from your boat at night too?

>>213893643
fweebo

>>213894290
it's kino until doakes dies

>>213897570
If you like dexter and your favorite character isn’t dexter, you are gay

>>213893643
pardon my legal ignorance but isn't Batista operating way out of his jurisdiction?
Dexter is innocent, the BHB case is closed, legally I don't think Batista has any authority to be harassing Dexter and his son the way he is

>>213897530
They did break up for a bit and slowly got back due to the kids. Plus Rita was kind of a doormat.

The real ridiculous shit was Batista x LaGuerta. Matthews was 100% in the right and was even trying to be flexible for them, but was lied to over and over and they still ended up divorced after just a few months.

>>213897570
Rita is my favorite character in that I've slung so many pearl ropes to Julie Benz that it could feed a small African village for a year.

>>213897615
Yeah, me too.

>>213897353
>>213897389
>>213897432
>>213897451
>>213897455
there are plenty of indications that Lundy had suspicions about Dexter
the key scene is when Lundy rips apart Dexter's bad blood report on one of the BHB victims, he clearly found it to be a huge red flag
at that point it's obvious that Dexter is on the short list of plausible suspects (along with Doakes), even Dexter says as much to himself
however shortly thereafter Doakes flies to Haiti and that sets off all these alarm bells, and they find the slides in his car

After Doakes gets blown up, Lundy has some dialogue where the other FBI guys all congratulate themselves on a job well done, and Lundy seems conflicted and says "Well, the evidence is convincing. Overwhelming, even..." but it's clear his gut is telling him Doakes is not the guy

>>213897607
Uhh Doakes and Lundy and Liddy even are all good picks

The highest compliment I've ever had in my life was a guy in college saying that "you have Dexter's body shape, man".

>>213889966 (OP)
The rest of the department never solved any homicide cases without him.
In retrospect it's a good commentary on how utterly fucking useless cops are.

>>213897615
She's pretty but I can't stand her AS Rita
she had this look like she was a terrified rabbit, like she'd break down and have a panic attack at any moment
plus she was a massive cunt

>>213893044
>>213893485
Ironically the lead writer of S1-4 did go on to write for Breaking Bad but the ghost Harry shit really only ramped up in S5 and onwards

>>213897702
Yeah Rita was fucking Skylar tier

>>213896089
>These two archetypes are just inherently contradictory
Not when you consider all of the killers who have never been caught.

>>213897717
I recently rewatched and I completely forgot the Harry ghost stuff came in so late

>>213897724
Honestly the show should have ended with S4 because after Rita's death, when they're all at the birthday party, that was a perfect closure moment for Dexter and the series
Him realizing that the idea of having a normal family and living happily-ever-after wasn't in the cards for him, because monsters don't get to have dreams
blows out the candle
fin

>>213897683
did you forget all the times suddenly became competent and were hounding in on Dexter's kills?

>>213897768
I literally thought ghost Harry was there the whole time but that could be because I started resurrection at the same time I started the original show

>>213897683
It's a team effort and he sabotages a lot of cases because he wants to murder the culprit himself. Most of them end up in garbage bags and the case goes unsolved.

>>213897768
yeah it's always werird watching season 2 and it not really being a thing even

>>213890462
you’re a creepy motherfucker you know that anon?

>>213897806
Nah the first "ghost" dexter talks to is his brother in season 2 and that's only briefly
the ghost Harry stuff while Dexter was just thinking to himself, didn't start until all the way in season 5

>>213897774
I liked deb finding out though, there was just so many better ways to handle the aftermath of shooting laguerta

>>213897868
>season 5
that shit started in 3 man

People pretend like season 4 to season 5 is this huge precipitous drop off in quality but
if you go rewatch the show, 1-4 and 5-8 are a lot closer than people act like they are

>>213894290
The parts where it isn't romantic relationship bullshit is pretty good to okay. Maybe those good to okay parts would look worse if we didn't have something more awful to break it up

>>213897931
it was still a little different in 3/4
was more like a dream sequence still
the out and out conversations started in 5

>>213897944
that's because while season 4 is still very good, it's extremely overrated

>>213889966 (OP)
He had enough years in the force to do the absolute bare minimum while Masuka covered for him.
Too expensive to fire

>>213897944
I'm watching it for the first time right now and while I really enjoyed season 6 I'm really not feeling it with season 7

>>213897986
true, I do miss the bloom effect they would always do for his scenes

>>213889966 (OP)
>when the other autist at work figures out you're also bullshiting your work

>>213897322
girlbrains writing, they need to self-insert what they would do finally being in the writers room to their favorite tv show. make dexter love something they love about themselves

>>213889966 (OP)
You have to look like this in order to avoid getting fired

>>213897611
She was a total doormat, Dexter probably could've kept cheating on her as long as he didn't rub her face in it

>>213898284
She grew some balls, and could confront him more easily because he knew he was guilty of something and would rather take anything but revealing the thing
she stood up to the c plot lady "my ex left his dog, he's an outside dog" the one time, got shut out, but at least she spoke up

>>213898360
fwiw she stole that dog and gave it to her friends kids

>first episode
>Dexter says he only hunts people that somehow slipped through the cracks of justice system
>later seasons
>Dexter intentionally borks cases just to kill people himself

>>213898558
He does that in Season 1 too thoughbeit

>be Miami Metro Homicide
>90% of your high-profile cases end up with main suspect vanishing into thin air

>>213897994
He also covered for Masuka plenty of times too, and there are dozens of times when other members of the precinct come to Dexter specifically for "off the books" stuff because apparently he has a reputation for being a guy you can rely on to be discrete and help you out

AND LaGuerta wanted his dick
no way he was ever getting fired

>>213898151
>they need to self-insert what they would do finally being in the writers room to their favorite tv show. make dexter love something they love about themselves
hot damn that's accurate
well put anon

>>213897944
I don't get people who hate S5. I really like the structure and pacing. Meanwhile, S4, which is totally lauded, has some of the absolute worst filler and less Trinity than I remembered.

anyone else think that the show was just an 8 season commercial for a 2010 Ford Escape?

>>213897475
And they didn't fucking know that. You dropped on your head as a kid?

>>213899257
was that the one with Lumen?
because if so, that's why

>>213898558
Dexter lies like a mattress.

>>213899295
He bought a mom minivan one time while stalking a target

>>213897994
>bare minimum
Dex solves basically all of Angel's cases for him

I just don't understand why there's so much romantic filler, that usually gets completely reset the next season anyway. If the writers wanted filler, they could just have Dexter kill someone. The potential was limitless.

>>213899453
Harry's code tells him to fit in and putting pussy on a pedestal is the most normalfag thing to do

>>213899520
It's fine when it's Dexter's romance, but did we need so much about Batista's love life? Remember that vice bitch who disappeared after season 3?

>>213893440
This. I work a normal job. I can't imagine having to then find the person (on my own time), pursue them, make a kill room, find the hours away to kidnap them, do the deed, cut up the body and go hide it, get back home, sleep, AND maintain a normal life outside of that too. That's way too much shit going on all at once. You just know he had no time to just sit back playing games or watch some show.

>>213896089
>>213896389
>>213897744
My theory is Dexter's just an autistic savant rather than true psychopath but Harrison didn't know the difference

>>213900016
He was diagnosed as a psychopath by Vogel. All that fake charm he puts on in social situations just isn't possible by one with autism.

>>213900101
There's a lot of misdiagnosis even within professional psychopathy, beside none of that charm shit came naturally he had to spend massive amount of time in New Blood learning, then the early seasons for learning about family life which he is still learning.

>>213894287
i finally tried a cubano and it was pretty fucking great

>>213900101
>All that fake charm he puts on in social situations just isn't possible by one with autism.
thats called masking

>>213900382
Psychopaths are way better at it than autismos

>>213900382
its so tiring. its so much effort. i cant do that shit all day

With all the shit Dexter's managed to pull off over the years he could easily deal with Batman

>>213900101
>>213900180
>>213900382
>>213900443
>>213900472
Have you noticed Dexter seems to focus more on putting on an act rather than pretty much any killer in the series? For them it seems much more intuitive

>>213900637
>totally regular looking, sound, talking guy comes through my line, buys lobster and pate, 300 bucks grocery bill
>slides his EBT card into the reader
would you like a reciept sir
>no
>look at the receipt after it prints, it shows the EBT accounts total balance (why the fuck does it)
>3000 dollars in EBT/food stamps
>watch them roll the shopping cart of fine meats and fresh seafood to their brand new dodge challenger. mrsp $78 thousand dollarydoos

what. why. when i applied, literally homeless, scraping by barely making eligibility for fucking drug addiction issues and they issued me 20 bucks a month in food assitance per month. i spent more on fucking bus tickets to get it then id get back in a fucking year. fuck everything

>>213900443
because autistics are pure of heart and psychos are evil

>>213889966 (OP)
There are time skips, we only see the highlights of his life. By the end of the original show, Dexter had been been killing for 22 years. Based on his estimated total kills, he was averaging roughly 1 kill a month in those years.

>>213892810
-is okay because they're not related. Oh wow, they lived in the same house growing up, so gross. Does that mean it's gross for people in an orphanage or went to school together to be a couple?

>>213897717
>>213897768
>>213897806
>>213897823
isn't he in literally every single episode? at least according to imbd. maybe he just shows up less frequently per episode early on

>>213899453
It's an uncomfortable fact that you may not like hearing, but Dexter is primarily a show for women
It's a soap opera more than it is a crime thriller

>>213900472
Who says you have to? It's OK to be quiet.

>>213897944
I watched it years ago and maybe I'm a brainlet but I didn't notice any notable quality drop other than the villains in the second half not being as good as the ones first half.

>>213899846
>You just know he had no time to just sit back playing games or watch some show.
Apprently he didn't need it. You just made me think back and I don't think we ever once really see Dexter doing normal leisure or hobbies in his spare time. We don't see him reading, or watching a movie, or just chilling. If we do see him alone he's either working on his next kill or just kind of thinking to himself with nothing else going on around him. Never any background noise. I don't think he even listens to music.

>>213890111
which of Dexter's donuts you grabbing?

>>213902066
it's just that they kept repeating the same formula of the early seasons, and it got repetitive, plus they started doing too much with the Ghost Harry "what about the code dexter..." stuff
and too much pointless relationship drama that was retreading old ground
also
>the villains in the second half not being as good as the ones first half.
the formula they kept trying to use really relies on having a good villain

>>213902155
I'm not seeing any chocolate in their, cake OR glazed
step it up, morgan

>>213900101
>Vogel
She was intentionally incompetent though. That's the whole point of her character. She was covering up for her tard son and throwing psychopath diagnoses left and right as a coping mechanism.

>>213902155
A cruller, of course.

>>213902155
Cruller, thanks Dex.

>>213889966 (OP)
nepo baby who brought donuts

>>213890462
Is your stepsister hot and have you had sex with her?

>>213894154
>effect

>>213902155
None. Cops shouldn't eat donuts.

>>213889966 (OP)
You realize this is a show for women?

>>213902021
Till S4 he only shows up in flashbacks and ethereal dream sequences, then from S5 it's like "sup son I'm a ghost haunting you forever now"

>>213889966 (OP)
is Dexter the best portrayal of a high functioning sociopath being forced to fit in with normies on TV?

>>213894106
>>213894126
In Tas for Dave’s Noodles they come in the box’s

>>213893375
Doakes did that retard

>>213890111
>As long as he was solving their cases
Like..?

>>213893643
Batista was 1 of 4 characters that was in every episode of the original show, they're not going to kill him off outside of a finale.

>>213902155
>refined sugar and gluten
No thank you.

>>213903786
the selection even sucks too
>strawberry glaze (?)
>old-fashioned
>powdered sugar
what the fuck is that supposed to be

>>213894290
yes, outside of retarded contrarians it's a critically acclaimed show which is why it's very popular. its got a lot of silliness but that's part of its charm.

>>213889966 (OP)
halo effect
works on the show just as much as on the audience
did you watch dexter new blood?
case closed

>>213900180
I really don't know what there is to be "learned", people always talk about psychos like they're aliens who just fell to Earth. Dude they're just shit people, they've had an upbringing, they live in a society, they know how to act like humans unless they're sub-85IQ holy shit.

>>213904863
He had to learn to fake emotions because he mostly has none. Telling the kids about Rita's death was a total shitshow he comes across like he doesn't care.

>>213889966 (OP)

Any job worth having won't care about you being "late". I've been on time about 5 times this year so far.

>>213904933
>*record scratch*
>*freeze frame*
>yep, that's me...

>>213889966 (OP)
Miami metro was the worse

>>213893865
>walks into a clothing shop and says I want to look like candy

>>213893643
>>213894217
He was even a cop before he became actor.

>>213894290
no

>>213897207
>psychologist
they're not miracle workers. if they can just fix you then women wouldn't be so deranged, since they always tout seeing a therapist. he's been a super hero serial killer than hasn't been sent to prison for 33 years. his "help" would have put him in a mental institution and probably end up killing someone innocent.

>>213897607
it's kind of refreshing because people are always contrarian and don't want the main character to be their favorite so they can be "different"

>>213897610
realistically the best approach Dexter and Harrison could take would be dismissive like "no wtf man, I'm not a killer, are you crazy? stop bothering me" but that wouldn't make for a tense scene, so they end up talking to him and making themselves look very guilty, especially Harrison.

>>213902155
powdered sugar

>>213890885
Anon, Dexter wasn't a police officer.

>>213889966 (OP)
When you've been with a place for long enough they let you slack off. Although he did slack off a little too much I agree

I ‘work’ from home 3 out of 5 days.
Sometimes I just go out to have a drink with a friend. Nobody cares

>>213889966 (OP)
The Sgt. doesn't know what Dexter actually needs to do, so as long as the work is getting done Dexter just looks polite always asking for permission to leave

LMFAO they really ramped up the Jew propaganda in this one. Incels? Losing a negress to commie Berkley in Commiefornia?

>>213902155
Glazed. Not really a fan of the others.

>>213906159
Blessing is basedhe knew Berkley was a commie shithole. Also Prater is just an /r/inceltears user he's also an incel which is why Uma Thurman chuckled

>>213894287
Cuban food generally seems pretty unappealing to me. Their best claim to fame is basically just a pulled pork sandwich.

>>213906159
Not to mention the "evil white landlord (gotta have an Italian name so you don't mistake him for a jew) exploiting poor mexicunts" and the "evil white serial killer" disliking the blacks.

>>213889966 (OP)
to me this one is funnier:
>can't dispose of his victim
>just takes some samples waiting for his colleagues to arrive
>haha guess what I found guys

>>213889966 (OP)
I do this too but I'm the boss' son in a small company so i can do whatever i want as long as shit gets done on time and i bring her food when i come late/back from doing personal stuff. I guess govt jobs must be a lot like being a nepo baby.

I love being a nepo baby btw, we should all be nepo babies, used to be family businesses were the standard.

>>213889966 (OP)
He was the station bunny.

>>213894290
Not really, you can watch first 2 seasons

>>213906262
Hope BLM burns everything down.

>>213890339
Can confirm. I'm one of the top IT guys at my place and basically come in an hour late every day at work and my boss even lets me have unsanctioned days off with pay because I've been able to save his ass numerous times

>>213890462
Is tonight the night?

>>213906398
>>213890339
this isn't even exclusive to high paying or high status jobs

>>213906356
Sorry I don't live in US we don't really have that many blacks here.

I get that you're jelly though, you have every right to be, it must suck being pretty much abandoned by your family and at the mercy of complete strangers than only see you as numbers and letters on a CV. For most of human history, people lived in small tribes, where children grew up and worked surrounded by parents, grandparents, siblings, cousins, and long-term acquaintances. Modern society puts most people into an unnatural environment where they're forced to cooperate with people they don't know or care about at all. I am sorry you are one of them, but don't hate me for being fortunate enough to avoid your fate.

>>213906262
> I'm the boss' son in a small company so i can do whatever i want as long as shit gets done on time and i bring her food when i come late/back from doing personal stuff
>small company
>her
>bring her food when i come back
.......you 'work' for your mom and she has a start-up from home that you're leeching off of?
and you bring food back because you're coming late, from doing personal stuff
because you live with her

this is elite human capital, a real self-made man

>>213906580
>you 'work' for your mom and she has a start-up from home that you're leeching off of?
Nah, it's an office, real estate administration. I worked on a shooting range before, was very fun also because i was surrounded by all my coworkers were my friends before i started working there, but mom really needed help and i figured eventually taking over the business is the smart thing to do even if i can't shoot guns on the job anymore.
>and you bring food back because you're coming late, from doing personal stuff because you live with her
Nah, I have my own place, i bring her food at the office because she hates cooking and going to the store.
>this is elite human capital, a real self-made man
I don't care about being "self-made", I'm not double digit IQ lmao. There's no such thing, anyways. Your life is shaped by whatever genes were passed to you and circumstances you were born into, nothing self-made about a man born into a first world country with opportunities out the ass rather than a starving nigger in africa. This whole self-made bullshit is just a huge psyop to fuck people out of generational wealth. I make full use of my opportunities. You'd have to be beyond retarded to willingly let go of those because, I don't even know, a jew on TV said it's bad?

>>213899316
They did know that he fucked up a lot, they didn’t know it was intentional

I just want to say that god the show really goes downhill in season 7

>>213897944
When I watched it I was skipping through season 3 but watched the rest.

My manager told me to stop getting so much work done as she said the other people in the office would resent me for being more efficient than them. But I think they resent me anyways as the manager gives me special treatment.

you never had a job anon
every workplace is like this

>>213906159
I stopped watching at the "white people cutting eachother up" line

>>213906398

at some point in the next couple years you will be casually replaced by an ai

>>213897545
"I really hate that name"

>>213894287
Goddamn that looks good.

>>213894154
In the police world no. Being a no show will get you fired really quick even if he's just csi. A lot of the things they do are time sensitive

>>213899329
lmao

>>213899257
Lumen is a pain in the ass

>>213899046
>>AND LaGuerta wanted his dick
that's probably the one reason why he would've been but batista had his back with la passion

>>213890111
>>213902155
Gotta have milk with donuts

>>213898558
tbf he probably knew they were never in a million years going to get caught by the clowns he works with so really it'd be worse if he waited

>>213890462
I'm on to you, anon

Doesn't he say in like episode 1 that Miami cops suck and lots of cases don't get solved, bunch of corruption etc.

>>213892143
>>213892810
horseface
manjaw
anglerfish

>>213893044
Do you have the one with the ghost of the broken plate that talks to walt?

that's how the world was when it functioned

SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER

>>213890111
>>213890208
Irl he would be pointed out by seeing HR crone's point system and fired in a month

>>213892143
you and the entire male cast LMAO

Dexter is a retard but everyone else around him is even more retarded

>>213913042
except for dexter unfortunately

>>213906398
sure buddy

>>213894154
affect*

>>213899846
>>213902110
He's not killing once a week, more like once a couple of months. Spaces things out apart of the one day and night he does the kill prep and clean up.
Hes shown fucking around on the boat when not dumping bags a few times and swimming in the pool.

need jamie feet

>>213900573
Absolutely not shot. Him getting away with his shit is entirely reliant on everyone around him being retarded.