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Thread 213893295

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Anonymous No.213893295
>HAAAAARRRRY POTTER DID YOU REDEEM YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE" Dumbledore roared, shaking the very foundations of the wizarding world, calmly.
>"No sir," Harry answered promptly "it was a Paki"
>Dumbledore looked in half-amazement, took a deep breath to calm himself , and screamed racial expletives so strong that somewhere, in the middle of getting pounded by 20 inch ginger cock in the library, Hermione Granger winced in the throes of white woman-POC empathy.
>" CURRY MUNCHER!, TUMERIC HUFFER!" Dumbledore exclaimed "DIAGON ALLEY SHITTER! LITERAL MUD-BLOOD! DOOKIE THE HOUSE ELF! HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-SMELLED"
>"Whats more," Harry added whilst handing Dumbledore his phone midst the tirade, "He sent us the ransom demands"
>Dumbledore squinted his eyes, slowly reading through the contents of the electronic letter that the poster had sent him, and then proceeded to get even angrier.
>"SIX MILLION GOLDEN GALLEONS!? WHAT KIND OF MONEY DOES HE THINK HOGWARTS HAS? WE BARELY HAVE ENOUGH FUNDING AS IT IS, WHY DO YOU THINK WE HAVE GOBLINS OVER? SLAVERY IS ECONOMICAL, POTTER! And whats more...he wants to meet a certain "Bob" and "Virginia"!? Who on earth are these people? Could he talking about Robert Dunsley from Ravenclaw? Goodness knows, potter, all i know is i cant pay this up!"
>Harry nodded in agreement, "i guess you have to take extreme measures , sir?"
>"INDEED I WILL. Potter, contact Moaning myrtle and ask her to coax the indian students from their natural habitat- she lives there after all, and bring them to me. I PROMISE YOU i will have them strung up like chicken ready to be made into butter masala if they dont reveal which one of them it was. ILL STARVE THE LOT OF THEM, OR MY NAME ISNT ALBUS WINSTON CHURCHILL BRIAN DUMBLEDORE THE 2ND"
Anonymous No.213893323 >>213894743
for me it's the one where dumbledore murders those two shitskins and then says "pakistan...is india."
Anonymous No.213893491 >>213894743
Whats your reddit account or the reddit forum you found us through last year, bob?
Anonymous No.213893777
>Whats your reddit account or the reddit forum you found us through last year, bob?
Anonymous No.213894743
>>213893491
Good morning saar

>>213893323
>"Step forward, my dear!" Dumbledore said to the girl, smiling warmly. Padma Patil approached cautiously, her fellow first years watching with interest.
>Stooping over to bring his face close to hers, Dumbledore asked, "From where are you joining us, young lady?"
>"India!" Padma replied. She had hardly uttered the last syllable before Dumbledore seized the girl by her collar and, with superhuman strength, shoved her into the wall. Such was his force that a spatter of bright red blood was left upon the rough hewn stone where Padma had impacted it, before falling into a heap upon the floor, utterly motionless. The great hall fell silent.
>"We are well rid of such filth," Dumbledore said calmly, the warmth now gone from his voice. "Now, next!"
>Parvati Patil stepped past her twin sister's corpse, struggling to contain her sobs. Nervously, she approached the Headmaster.
>"And where is it that you're from, my dusky dear?" Dumbledore asked.
>"P-Pakistan...?"
>"Pakistan?" Dumbledore turned to the assembled students. "Pakistan!" he said mirthfully, beaming. A nervous laughter of relief rippled through the crowd.
>And then, in a blindingly quick motion, Dumbledore seized the girl's head forcefully and brought it in close to his. Partvati's body writhed and thrashed violently for a moment as Dumbledore applied the Dementor's Kiss, filling the last few moments of the girl's life with raw agony before she crumpled beside her sister.
>Straightening himself, Dumbledore turned back to the students and let out a long, satisfied sigh. "Pakistan," he said, "is India."