Thread 214262811

*loses no weight in your path

>well what about the fire-breathing dragons and the ice zombies

Those work in the story because they contrast with the otherwise-realistic nature of the GoT world. People die get fatal infections from cuts on the chest, they take months and months to cross the continent. If stuff like teleporting across the continent, not losing weight and surviving a stab wound to the stomach are accepted, then the impact of the sci-fi elements is lost.

>>214262811 (OP)
The Island sustained him

>>214262909
Yeah. Unless stated otherwise, we assume that the humanos of planetos are the same homo like us.

>>214262811 (OP)
Yeah, there's literal magic sooo?

>some fantasy elements exist in the story there for absolutely nothing has to make sense or have any consistency

There is no lower IQ method of defending a story than this.

>>214263735
what spell?
Why wasn’t it explicitly shown that some sorcerer or sorceress cast a spell so that the Night’s Watch would remain fat?

The Wildlings should have noticed that he is an infinite calorie machine and sold him to the cannibals. It makes sense and would be a fitting metaphor for GRRM.

>>214262811 (OP)
That’s your problem with the show? lol.
>rolls away with KFC 50 piece bucket under arm

>>214262811 (OP)
it was really cold at Castle Black so he kept the weight on to stay warm

>>214262811 (OP)
I hadn't thought of this. There's no way you could remain fat in the Night's Watch

>>214263735
get this woman a 2021 bmw 5 series 530i with optional heated seating

and sam, whose weight i do quibble with

>>214262811 (OP)
legit hated this fat fuck, not interesting in the least unless he was talking about other people.

FINISH THE BOOKS YOU FAT FUCK

>>214262909
>they take months and months to cross the continen
You must've stopped watching after season 3

>>214262811 (OP)
well yeah, i would't like somenone to shit on the path i had to walk

>>214264197
You must've stopped reading the post after that sentence

>>214262811 (OP)
itt: retards

>>214262811 (OP)
I never watched Game of Thrones or read the books. Should I do either knowing the final season is awful and that the books wont be finished?

>>214264220
the books are probably better to get more out of the series at this point

>>214264220
>Should I do either knowing the final season is awful and that the books wont be finished?
No, but I'm tempted to suggest you watch the show purely because the first season was probably the greatest kino to ever appear on TV. Season 2 - 4 are good. Drops off a cliff by season 5 and finally crashes at 8.

>>214262811 (OP)
He’s like Kingpin. It looks like fat, but it’s all muscle.

>>214262909
Clearly you missed the scene with the dreaded thyroid cabal and their curse

he gave us the worst sex scene in the entire history of tv shows
rly the worst, and completly unnecessary to the plot, its just as bad as the naked maisie william scene the night before the battle of winterfell. you know just insisted to production to have that sex scene because other actress got one sex scnee but arya never did, she wanted to be shown as mature, i rly hate maisie williams more than anything, she completly ruined arya character after leaving for bravo, she is almost just as bad as peter dinklage who will forever ruin the tyrion character, tyrion was never supposed to be a fan favorite, he is supposed to be spiteful and hateful

>>214264704
>supposed to be spiteful and hateful
>entire family except Jamie openly call you a freak and embarrassment to family
Gee, I wonder why anon? Also, most of the lannisters are spiteful except Tywin and the other kids besides Joffrey

>>214264749
YES YOU GOT IT, Tyrion is supposed to have a vengeful act after the trial.
BUT NO, WE GOT COMIC RELIEF FAN FAVORITE TYRION INSTEAD "I AM GOOD AT DRINKING AND THINKING" (thank you peter dinklage)

>>214264772
Yeah I mean they screwed the pooch entirely after season 3. Brans story was much better and he was much more stoic in the books too. He unironically was a good fit for king, but D and D rushed his greenseer arc and it fell flat. They also did my boy Stannis dirty

>>214264772
Yeah, fuck Peter Dinklage for writing and directing his entire character.

>>214264855
its clear that GOT actor were able to influence the writing of their character, the writers seem that bad, thats why almost everything after the red wedding looks like fan fiction. I wouldn't be suprised that Peter Dinklage even convinced the write to not do his vengeful act so he could remained a fan favorite. But I rather talk about how much I hate Maisie Williams and that I am 100% sure she was the one who insisted to have her naked scene

>>214263716
Hurley started sneaking rations, peanut butter and what not from the bunker.

>>214263716
While silly, they showed Hurley was eating air dropped food like mayo and what not. He wasn't on a frozen hell wall eating the same rationed slop as hundreds of fit men while doing daily training and exercises. Hurley passes, Sam fails

>wears shorts, flipflops, a luna lovegood lion hat and motoko's ghost in the shell jacket on Night's Watch duty, on the Wall
>IT'S FANTASY IT'S NOT REAL SNOW GEEZ!

>>214264851
>He unironically was a good fit for king
>The king is the one that has the coolest arc!
Literal baby mindset

>>214262811 (OP)
accurate to the novels

FAT PINK MAST

>>214262811 (OP)
>fatso GGRR self-insert character is also a fatso
why

I wish I skipped all the scenes with this fat fuck when I first watched it

>>214262811 (OP)
>becomes grand maester despite not even having a chain
there should be a GOT comedy sequel just showing how quickly Westeros would implode
>master of coin and lord of Highgarden that is an illiterate sellsword
>North led by retarded girlboss Sansa
>illiterate bastard blacksmith leading the Stormlands
>independent iron islands

>>214262811 (OP)
>samwise ganji
>samwell tarly
lol not my problem

>>214266206
>Directed by Larry David
>Curb your Enthusiasm outro playing

>>214263716
Hurley was stealing food from the Hatch, and the survivors were only on the island for 3 months before the Oceanic Six escaped, and there's points where he mentions that he has started losing weight and is just so fat in the first place that other people don't notice

>>214262811 (OP)
Glandular problem combined with hyper efficient digestion that allows him to extract more calories per food item than the average man.

>>214262811 (OP)
Say what you want about The Walking Dead but at least for some time it had the balls to point out the obvious.

>lasts a fortnight
>still has bones left over for soup

>>214262811 (OP)
Realistically just the trip north of the Wall would cause him to lose 10-20 kg. There's no way the first thing Ser Allister isn't doing to any lardasses like Sam is putting them on the hardest diet known to man.

>>214266496
those negan at alexandria episodes were the peak of the series

>>214264985
>>214265032
>>214266242
I remember that, but I don't remember the timeline. Also, didn't he even burn the food once?

>>214267030
they were ranging beyond the wall for months on starvation rations, especially after getting crushed by the wights and marching back to craster's. Only explanation is if Sam has some Garth Greenhand magic blood keeping him a fat slob in any conditions

>>214267140
iirc it's something like
>mid season 1: someone asks him why he hasn't lost weight, and he responds that he has but no one other than him noticed because he was so fat to begin with and no one knows each other that well yet
>beginning of season 2: the hatch opens and he starts stealing food and stashing it away to pig out, which makes him regain the weight he lost
>middle of season 2: he decides to try and actually lose weight and destroys all the food he stole
then for the rest of season 2, 3 and 4 he's implicitly losing weight but it never really comes up, and it's only like 40 days of dieting anyway
it's kind of a silly copout but it's a miles better explanation than "zombies and dragons exist so nothing needs to make sense, stop asking questions chud"

>>214262811 (OP)
>I'm sorry ser, but the waist size for new trousers is rather... Irregular.
>Well, I suppose life is Irregular.

>>214262909
No dip

>>214264220
At least watch s1 of the show. Its really good tv.

>>214264704
>he gave us the worst sex scene in the entire history of tv shows
He had a sex scene?

>>214262811 (OP)
This guy was the GRRM self-insert, right?

>>214268195
>Sam found himself kissing her back. I said the words, he thought, but her hands were tugging at his blacks, pulling at the laces of his breeches. He broke off the kiss long enough to say, "We can't," but Gilly said, "We can," and covered his mouth with her own again. The Cinnamon Wind was spinning all around them and he could taste the rum on Gilly's tongue and the next thing her breasts were bare and he was touching them. I said the words, Sam thought again, but one of her nipples found its way between his lips. It was pink and hard and when he sucked on it her milk filled his mouth, mingling with the taste of rum, and he had never tasted anything so fine and sweet and good. If I do this I am no better than Dareon, Sam thought, but it felt too good to stop. And suddenly his cock was out, jutting upward from his breeches like a fat pink mast. It looked so silly standing there that he might have laughed, but Gilly pushed him back onto her pallet, hiked her skirts up around her thighs, and lowered herself onto him with a little whimpery sound. That was even better than her nipples. She's so wet, he thought, gasping. I never knew a woman could get so wet down there. "I am your wife now," she whispered, sliding up and down on him. And Sam groaned and thought, No, no, you can't be, I said the words, I said the words, but the only word he said was, "Yes."

>>214268293
Far from the worst sex scene in the books.

>“I’d sooner fuck you.” One quick slash unlaced her jerkin. Asha reached for her axe, but Qarl dropped his knife and caught her wrist, twisting back her arm until the weapon fell from her fingers. He pushed her back onto Glover’s bed, kissed her hard, and tore off her tunic to let her breasts spill out. When she tried to knee him in the groin, he twisted away and forced her legs apart with his knees. “I’ll have you now.”
>“Do it,” she spat, “and I’ll kill you in your sleep.”
>She was sopping wet when he entered her. “Damn you,” she said. “Damn you damn you damn you.” He sucked her nipples till she cried out half in pain and half in pleasure.
>Her cunt became the world. She forgot Moat Cailin and Ramsay Bolton and his little piece of skin, forgot the kingsmoot, forgot her failure, forgot her exile and her enemies and her husband. Only his hands mattered, only his mouth, only his arms around her, his cock inside her. He fucked her till she screamed, and then again until she wept, before he finally spent his seed inside her womb.
Also why are women like this?

>hmm, that scene at the end of the show where a giant rainbow unicorn flies down from the sky, farts glitter on all the remaining characters, and it forces them to put their old conflicts aside, join hands and sing a song about why Donald Trump is evil felt a bit silly and out of place...
>UHHH ITS A SHOW WITH DRAGONS AND ICE ZOMBIES AND YOURE ANGRY ABOUT THE UNICORN BEING UNREALISTIC? MAN WHAT AN IDIOT ITS JUST A SHOW GET OVER IT.

The more unrealistic thing is Gilly becoming Sam's gf. She would have ditched him for a crow chad as soon as he brought her back to castle black.

>>214267397
Appreciate it.

>>214268293
>>214268580
No way these are real excerpts from the books, you guys are fucking with me right? I thought grrm was supposed to be a good writer.

>>214269813
dont worry the movie version was truly awful. if i remember correctly, a bunch of night watch was gonna rape the wildling girl, but sam came to stop them, the night guard laugh because its sam and beat him up, ghost appear to save sam, everyone get scared and leave. sam is now in his bed being cared by the wildling girl, she climb on his bed and have sex with him while he stuck in the bed unable to move, he make a weird sound like "ooooh" or something.. ya that sound like that..
still better than maisie williams (you know she forced the producer to give her a sex scne right?)

>>214269813
They are real.
He is a pro at prose

>>214269813
he can write anything but sex

>>214264915
The issue is that in the books the thing that finally breaks Tyrion and makes him bent on revenge is Jaime telling him the truth about Tysha, which never happens in the show so he stays as a vaguely-moral character like he is in the early going in both the books and show.

>>214269813
>Sunset found her squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up she was shitting brown water. The more she drank, the more she shat, but the more she shat, the thirstier she grew, and her thirst sent her crawling to the stream to suck up more water.
Brought to you by the guy who wrote the perilous poopoo eater for Elden Ring.

Remember when they briefly tried to make him a thing after GOT ended but it failed cause he's a fat stupid moron who sucks?

>>214271007
they wanted to write that but Peter Dinklage insisted that it would ruin the character and he doenst want to do it (he would have quit). For example, the actor of Joffrey stopped acting after his role because he got too much hate, peter dinklage used that as an exucse

>>214271220
no i dont remember, please enlighted us all

>>214270116
I know it was weird in the show, but I am certain that it made more sense in the book. After all, why wouldn't Arya (stark) want to have a kid with Gendry (baratheon) that was the whole point of the begining of the show between sansa and joffrey. im sure she was forced and didnt want to

>>214263716
>>214262811 (OP)
i've been compared to both these people in my life and it's what partly fuels me to still work out