Thread 214281659

Funko Exclusive Edition

Previous: >>214276289

>>214281659 (OP)
Nothing in this show makes any sense. I cant remember the last time Ive watched a tv series with this many plotholes.

>>214281659 (OP)
Hyped to add these to my collection!

funkos gay af

>>214281659 (OP)
Fuck it, I am rooting for the eye thing and Morrow

Why did the eye thing attack the Xenomorph? What's its endgame?

>>214282014
Wherever it goes it must eyeball

LET ME OUT

Ultimate Kino Ending:
>Neverland blows up
>Wendy, the lone survivor looks back on the ruins after getting far enough to survive the explosion
>snap-zoom, she sees Kirsh pull himself from the wreck with something tucked under his arms
>cut to Kirsh, he gives her a knowing nod before getting in a Tyrell Corp sub
>Oculus bounds forward from within the glass under Kirsh's arm, looking back on his friend
>Slide Away by Oasis plays to credits

do they also put the aliens in cryo? how do they expect all these animals to be alive when they wake up?

Is there a single reason aside from pretentiousness to not have made this the first episode and have the second episode start with the crash?

The only things I feel like it could possibly spoil were that the ticks could reproduce and that Ocellus-Chan was a bodysnatcher, but neither of things affect the story at all.

So what possible reason could there be aside from pretentiousness?

>>214282071
So they could tease a big Hawley episode in the middle of the season, when interest would flag

>>214281659 (OP)
Animorphs did it better 30 years ago. Plus it doesnt physically damage the host beyond recognition. The eye alien doesnt even make sense biologically.

>>214282105
Yeerks are generic brand Ga'ould.

>>214282071
I think it would be more jarring to then suddenly introduce the kids and the crew we were all just introduced just died. Wendy is the protagonist afterall. Also then it would make Morrow the protagonist but hes supposed to be bad.

>>214282160
>actually tried to save his crew, but they were busy being too retarded to live
>is in what's basically enemy territory acting against the guy that got his crew killed
Really, the only thing that doesn't make the hero of this story is this episode being the fifth instead of the first

>>214281659 (OP)
>>214281757
Funko pop? More like Unko poo, www

>sperm is just really tiny tadpoles
Is Hawley onto something?

>>214282014
>eyeball lives by taking over a creatures eye socket and replacing their eye
>xenomorphs have no eyes
They’re natural enemies, for all we know the two species could have been at war for millennia.

>>214282014
He didn't have a plan, he was just eyeballing it.

>>214282278
What doesn't make sense to me is the alien killing humans rather than subduing them. We see that a lot in films more often than not. Aliens need people alive to breed, and there are more eggs on the ship.

>>214282324
that would be cool

>>214282014
>>214282056

>>214282324
Xenomorphs do have eye sockets. They are just hidden inside their heads.

>>214282350
I figure that’s why the Xenomorph kept playing around with Hermit and even took him to use as bait, like it slaughtered entire room of people in seconds but keeps fucking around with this one dude.
Which then just begs the question why him specifically?

>>214282324
But that would make them more likely to have a collaborative relationship, like wolves and humans

was this shot really needed?

>>214282451
>>214282584
calm down autismo

>>214282604
its a shill

>>214282604
You sure put it together pretty quick that someone was calling you out on your retardation.
Let me guess, you're just pretending?

Will it be explained why the Android girl, Wendy, understands and speaks the Xenos language?

Is it worth watching the latest episode? It feels gimmicky to go back in the story at this point.

>>214282566
>"hey check out how hard I can pee"

i had a dream about the tick things last night

>>214282663
>Is it worth watching the latest episode?

Yes. Its like a mini Alien movie and provides a bit more context for what's happening.

>>214282663
It's worth watching only to get the feeling that the eye thing is more than what it seems. Other than that, it's pretty skippable.

>>214282660
I can tell that it is you.
Stop asking stupid ass inane questions.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

>>214282710
No. Seriously, why can Wendy speak alien all of a sudden?

>>214282460
Are all xenos like that?

>>214282350
We only really see that in Aliens, and for all we know, Xenos don’t normally form hives like that. We have no idea how much their behavior/physiology varies, since their main goal is just to get eggs/facehuggers made at any cost.

>>214282160
I’d be way more into the amazing adventures of Boy Retard and his robots if I knew what aliens they were up against and why Morrow was after them.

>>214282844
How do you know?

>>214282643
Meds. I didnt even make those posts.

>>214282770
Because she tried talking to it, which is what no one ever did.

>>214282892
The alien itself doesn’t seem to have any ability to reproduce. That’s all the facehugger’s job, and it’s also the only form of the alien whose form is constant.

>>214283067
That suggests the xenomorphs are female, with the glarker functioning as a hemipenis. The facehugger is the male.

>>214281659 (OP)
>Morrow saw Kavalier just tell the ruskie to dive the ship head first into his own city
>never told that to the synth kids, even if to increase their doubt on their loyalty to him
>specially if he had saved the video and/or after he read more about prodigy than what little the video let him know
Ok, but why?

Who writes this shit?

>>214282105
>organ-replacing parasite doesn't make sense biologically
You know we have those IRL right

>>214283182
Yep! My assumption is that xenos have no clear gender, with the face huggers being kinda male, the host being female, the chestbuster being either female or genderless, and eggs produced… somehow, depending on what the environment is like.

>>214281659 (OP)
>>214281757
Buy an ad shill

Ep 5 was probably my fav just cuz I don't have to deal with stupid android bullshit for an hour. The sets for the ship is awesome and the fact that the xeno is kept in darkness distracted me from the fact its the worst xeno design in the franchise. The black guy shanking a dude with his arm was pretty neat. I kinda want him to win honestly.

>>214282833
I'd say it's mostly a thing in the first movie only, when the Alien was an actual biomechanical horror. The later versions of the Alien went all in on the "chitin-covered insectoid" style that Aliens popularized.
In fact, if you look at the closer shots of the xeno's face in the first movie you can sometimes see that the head shell is actually kind of translucid, and you can see the eyesockets obscured beneath all the shell and dim lighting. It blew my mind when I noticed it just a couple of years ago.

Also based Alien Isolation does the translucid head shell thing too.

So the eye thing wanted to save the black biologist lady from the leeches?

>>214282071
>he only things I feel like it could possibly spoil were
uh. Boy Kavalier inviting the crash so he could steal a bunch of ayylmao specimens doesn't seem like a "spoiler" if it had been in the first episode?

>>214283604
No, it wanted to distract her.

>>214283604
well yeah cuz if the leeches get her before he could then he's down a potential host body. Its like seeing someone about to jack your ride.

"Wendy" is a stupid name

I've seen episode 6. I know someone who got all the screeners. I'm not going to reveal much, but AMA

>>214283337
The chestburster is probably a pre-fertilized female. My guess:
>Egg produces male facehugger
>male facehugger produces fertilized female chestburster
>chestburster grows to xenomorph
>female drone xenomorph hemipenises fertilized eggs into captured humans to somehow make eggs filled with male facehuggers
>hemipenis female xenomorphs can change sex into gestational females to produce eggs with drone females
So there are three sexes: males, drone females, and gestational females. Just like bees.
>>214283493
That's actually something that occurs in nature. There are three eye nerve-clusters in vertebrates. Most have two outside the skull and one inside, like humans, but some deep sea fish have all three inside a translucent skull.

I liked the dirt chick she was kinda hot

>>214283686
What color is your anus

>>214283648
It had an opportunity to jump on her face later with ease but it just decided not to do it.

>>214283736
Well yeah cuz he's also not a fucking bigot and decided not to kill a nubian kween

>>214283697
That wasn't dirt, it was sacred feces from her homeland.

>>214283768
KEK

>>214283672
But Peter Pan Peter Pan Peter Pan Peter Pan Peter Pan Peter Pan Peter Pan. Did I mention Peter Pan?
>*looks directly into camera*
>Hey, audience. This is about Peter Pan. We will mention this 20 more times in this series just in case you missed it.

>>214282105
>zoomer's reference to this is fucking Animorphs and not Wrath of Khan

>>214283612
Nah, because we learn he’s an upstart aspiring rival to WY within the first 5 minutes of episode 1. The FaceTime in this episode didn’t teach us anything new.

Wayland Yutani deserves to win this corpo war based solely on the fact that they have better aesthetics. Slight loss of points for the retarded star wars guards but I'll let it slide.

>>214281757
>>214281659 (OP)
Where can I buy?

>>214283875
cuckstore.onions/slopfigurine.html

>>214282014
Probably evolved on the same planet or from a planet invaded by xenos. It knows they're dangerous and doesn't want them to spread.

>>214281659 (OP)
Was this show produced with the explicit pretext of selling funko pops?

it seems to be the case for most modern reddit-oriented shows

>>214283889
It didn't work, it keeps redirecting to an image of your mom's house

>>214283910
For my money, I'd rather buy those neca figures.

>>214282071
They probably didn’t want too many consecutive slow episodes.

>>214283870
The star wars guards might have been in some ceremonial gear to impress Morrow with how important Yutani thinks he is.

>>214281757
Xeno looks like he's putting on the Ritz.

>>214281757
Why is the xeno covered in shit

>>214283910
Always has been

>>214281659 (OP)
>>214281757
>Funko Pops
>not Labubus
Such 2010s boomer energy.

Morrow: We need to retake control of this ship!
Zaveri: https://youtu.be/_w1l5C8UqXg

>>214283493
They attempted it for Aliens as well, but the domes kept getting cracked, so they did away with them.

>>214283822
animorphs is a millennial thing bud

>>214283838
First 4 episodes allowed some ambiguity as to whether he's evil or just a dickhead. If the FaceTime had been in the first episode, the season would drag because you'd already know exactly what he's planning while all the other characters are slowly catching up.
Like if Ash turned to the camera and said "I'm a robot. Don't tell Ripley" and winked, before going into his little science bubble in Alien. Or if there had been a scene of Burke meeting with some high-level W-Y execs and they told him to get Ripley facehugged.
Or if the opening scene of Alien 3 had shown a facehugger on Ripley's cryo-pod. ;^)

>>214284050
labubus are evil

>>214284050
Frankly, it's pretty remarkable that funkos are still popular enough to get new stuff made.

>>214283794
>Wendy, Darling

>>214284351
As long as there is brand name garbage people will throw away cash to have it

>>214284373
>Kavalier talking to Wendy
>"Wendy, darling... wait... WENDY DARLING???? PETER PAN?????? IT'S JUST LIKE PETER PAN DO YOU GET IT YET?????
>he opens his peter pan book and shows wendy a part of a page that says wendy darling
>"SEE? SEE??? YOU'RE WENDY, I'M PETER PAN, THE NIGGER IS CAPTAIN HOOK, IT'S JUST LIKE PETER PAN!!!!!!!!"

>>214284515
dude this will get you so many updoots

>>214284351
Funko is scraping the bottom of the barrel at this point. They've already sold everything anyone cares about.

>>214284563
They don't have anything for Taboo, I checked.

>>214284522
>Wendy: OMG! This means the xeno is the croc and I can hear it talking just like the ticking of the clock in the book!
>Writer: I am a genius
>Audience: This is fucking retarded

>>214284050
Thats not even how Labubus work, retard. Labubus are their own thing.

>>214284351
It's a tax write off
They just write it off

>>214284781
Ok mister labubu specialist

>>214284849
bet no worries unc

>>214284781
Don't care.

I like the headbite sound effect. WHAKSHH-
is there like an isolated soundbite of it?

>No Wendy
Shit episode

>>214285562
>convert episode to wav or mp3
>go to 56:43
>snip it out
>feed it to a stem splitter

>No Wendy
kino episode

>>214285562
>>214286824
/files catbox moe /zhcxzf.wav

>>214286890
whats wrong with Wendy?

>>214282347
kek

>>214287018
Dude you're awesome I was half expecting sounds of someone shitting or something

>Boy Kavalier for any amount of time
horrible episode

Thank God everyone on that ship died. They all deserved it.

>>214287591
can't wait to watch that fag get mulched

I skipped all the parts of this episode without Morrow

>>214287699
We get it you wanna watch niggers 24/7

>>214282014
they're both parasitic organisms.
one seeks to control hosts.
one seeks to kill hosts.
they're natural enemies.
nigger.

>Show takes place in 2120
>Maginot started its mission in 2055
>Semiotic Standard is used all around the ship
>According to the Lore, these Symbols were developed in 2078

Nigga, please. This Hawley motherfucker dropped the ball from orbit.

>>214287933
Just because it has that year in the corner doesn't mean it was developed then

>>214288047
Fuck off, Hawley.

>>214287933
>muh symbols
of all the things this guy butchered, you really want to talk about some symbols?

Alien in really not the franchise to care about accuracy of lore, and especially off-screen lore.

The fuck is up with the sound mix in this show? Can barely make out the dialogue. It's like a Nolan film.

>>214288153
>Alien in really not the franchise to care about accuracy of lore, and especially off-screen lore.
lmao wtf? The entire thing is about alien lore

>>214287933
so what does Padme Amidala have to do with the self-destruct on the Nostromo

>>214288724
>Padme
>Shakti

>>214288153
The people that care are definitely in the minority, considering a good portion of the fanbase are boomers who aren't autistic about that stuff

>>214288666
Comic books are for developmentally stunted children.

>>214281698
fpbp

>>214282105
wait that's what those look like? they were described as worms so that's what i imagined

>>214283304
that's not what he was referring to i think
>oh look, animals on other planets also have eyeballs just like ours even thought lots of animal species *on our own planet* not using those

>>214287593
In retrospect it would have been more believable if the entire crew were military grade pest control personnel with experience in gassing, zapping and netting these creatures. It would make sense that one of those mercenaries would betray yutani and make a deal with cavalier after seeing his mates being killed for shit pay. It is difficult to believe how those people even captured the critters.The nostromo crew were space truckers and even they werent this retarded.

>>214281698
that's not a plot hole

>>214287774
both kill the hosts
zombeye should even be able to use chestburst bodies

>>214288666
I’m sorry Ridley grifted you Alien was always Halloween in Space

>>214282660
It's not said she understands it, just that she can hear it, and replicate it

>>214289996
nigger, eye guy can't infect dead bodies.

>>214288088

did you know his icloud password is "Author"?

>>214283686
>is it a waste of time?
>does kirsh have a bigger role?
>what do we see of the alium?

i honestly dont even know what to ask anymore because ive lost any excitement for this piece of shit, i've just realised i dont even care what happens to anyone except kirsh

>why is there a baby Ayylmaos?
>why are we watching it grow?
>why demystify the alien?

>>214290084
That half cat looked pretty dead.

>>214290180
>digitigrade legs....
came from human, make it make sense

FUCK NOAH HAWLEY

>>214290180
don't worry, it's a retarded test tube alien.
grew out of a lung instead of a full human so it didn't get all the nutrients it needs.

>>214290198
Didnt the maginot ayy lmao have digigrate legs too?

>>214283934
keked

how would you rate the show so far? 5 episodes in i am thinking this slop is a very generous 4.269/10

>>214290532
yes, but why?

>>214290713
Because it does why does it need explanation?

>>214290771
because its not humanoid, alien takes on it's hosts characteristics, and humans aren't animals that have digitigrade legs... pretty simple, you just exposed yourself as a tourist and not an alien fan

>>214290771
Details are important.

>>214290832
They’re making their own lore there’s no eyeball squids in the movies either.

>Alien: Earth
>there are multiple Aliens on Earth
H
A
W
L
E
Y

>>214290848
Do you understand what redesign means?

>>214290832
Maginot captain was Australian, half-criminal, half-kangaroo.

I thought 5 was the best episode by far.
I think to many people Alien = facehuggers and xenomorphs. But to me Alien = the fear of the unknown, or specifically an unknown alien species that does horrible things to you. That is what defined the original movie. We did not know what the rules were to the aliens and the movie was about learning those rules. Aliens (2) had a few new things in like the queen. 3 had nothing new and I think that is part of why it is not a good movie. 4 also didn't really have anything new except for the hybrid at the end but that is stupid. We can say the same thing about Romulus. For as much as people hate Prometheus and Covenant those movies had new things. As I watched those two movies I once again felt just how I did when watching the original movie, I did not know what was going to happen. If Prometheus just simply had facehuggers in it I think it would have been a lesser movie.
There's alot of things I don't like about Alien earth but I think the bold inclusion of a bunch of new species is heavily working in its favor. I don't know what the rules are to these new creatures and i'm on the edge of my seat as we find out. I'd like to see more episodes like 5.
I just don't give a shit about the androids. I know you guys have all waifud Wendy but to me this story about android children has nothing to do with Alien.

>>214290867
why?

>>214290999
why would you redesign?

>>214291058
>>214291075
why not?

>>214290867
>>214289996
>>214291041
Bro the eye alien is literally the main character of Alien Earth and you clowns just did not notice. Every time the humans are crying about food or fighting each other the eye alien is just floating there like a smug balloon taking notes. That thing has more screen time than half the cast and it never even blinks. You thought the story was about survival but no it is about one big floating eyeball silently judging everyone like a cosmic Reddit mod. The crew dies the plot twists flop but the eye alien keeps vibing. It is the real protagonist and the rest are just NPCs in its reality TV show.

>>214291114
Eye alien = the camera, it's all very meta and clever, entering different species heads is just a metaphor for using different lenses for shots

>>214290180
Why not? Showing the xeno growing is one of the few things movies and other media havent shown even though theres been xenos in containment before.

>>214291129
I think it’s to parallel with how they moved the children’s consciousness to new bodies

>>214290198
makes it look more alien, same as the tubes coming out the back.

Why did they put what should've been the 1st episode as the 5th episode? What a waste of an episode in a fucking 8 episode season

>>214291107
Because the designs are already there for the alien, wtf are you retarded mate

>>214291114
fuck eye-lene

>>214291198
no makes it more animalistic, less alien

>aliens escape containment
>episode 7 is showing everyone getting killed in neverland and wendy alone
>episode 8 is an episode dedicated to teaming up with the eye alien to take down the xenomorph
>she finally does it with the eye alien on her shoulder
>a knowing exchange between the two
>she goes onto the helipad to escape with her new friend
>her face drops
>"No, it can't be"
>in the end starts playing
>camera pans out to show thousands of xenomorph eggs in the jungles and animals being hunted
>Alien earth logo pops up as "In the end, it didnt even matter" plays
This show is retarded enough that this ending could happen

>>214291358
yeah but that sounds kino and i wish you had written and directed the show now

>>214291358
They have planned 5 seasons, Anon. It will end with Olyphant GTFO with one alien egg/facehugger/infected human to keep his own research and cybanigga getting other to Yutani.

>>214291218
there’s no way someone can be this unintentionally pedantic, I’m not going to reply to posts like yours anymore

>>214291403
It'll be an anthology probably
Next season will be office comedy in a WY field office

>>214281659 (OP)
imagine the eye dude in in its natural habitat where they fit properly inside the host's eye socket. you wouldn't necessarily be able to immediately tell if an engineer was taken over by the eye since its size is roughly the same as an engineer's eyeball.

>>214291358
actually it's leaked that the eyeball is going to use nibs as a host and talk, it wont be fluent english think of it more like ET, it ends up getting killed though trying to make the audience root for it

>>214291405
ok shill but a lot of people are asking these detail orientated questions because we're actually fans of the originals, not this disney garbage, but caryr on shill jew

>>214291427
>Next season will be office comedy in a WY field office
FX hire this man!

>>214290084
right

>>214283690
>>214283337
Holy shit, you're both completely retarded.

>>214290832
humans don't have two pairs of double fingers together with two opposable thumbs
make it make sense

>>214291213
why would changing the order waste an episode

>>214291504
You’re a smart fella but you’re thinking further than the writers and concept artists. Those are places they wouldn’t touch even if in their wildest dreams, maybe if they get someone to couch them 8 hours per day on imagination and deep processing brain abilities, maybe then.

>>214291713
demonized neet detected

>>214282324
Wait are writers that insightful? They really thought hard about this and came up with a justification for the lack of eyes on the alien?

>>214291626
How did it revive a dead brain? Brains decay stupidly fast once they're dead and it's irreversible, nothing can bring them back.
Now that cat was meowing and so on, using higher order functions of the brain, walking etc.

>>214291358
This but with the baby alien on her shoulder and the eyeball riding the little alien. The alien should probably be singing show tunes and doing a little dance.

>>214291913
But he replaces the brain? The real question is how long a dead host would last.

>>214282039
LET ME IN

IT'S COMING

What's the name of the little octopus eye. I don't even care about the Alien or corpos anymore. Show should be about her.

>>214291926
The gamma brain waves came from the sheep's brain, it's more like a parasite that is able to nudge the host into any direction it pleases but again it stretches the limits of imagination on how it revives the brain.
It's just magic at this point.

>>214291932
this is what neets look like to their perpetually angry parents

also is that a Murloc?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOpdyytB3OY

>>214291944
>It's just magic at this point.
Just wait for the dude with acid as blood that grows 50 times bigger in a day without eating. Welcome to the Alien franchise.

>>214291944
it's no different than any other shit

>>214291961
>Just wait for the dude with acid as blood that grows 50 times bigger in a day without eating
You haven't watched alien, have you?

>>214291967
faster than light hand-wave travel lol

>>214291976
3 or 4 times over the years. What's even your point?

Remember when this franchise was about the Alien and not black goo, androids, cyborgs and corpo drama?

>>214291961
Uh he... umm... he extracts vacuum energy at the quantum level, plug one to your energy grid today! Limitless energy.

>>214292016
>plug one to your energy grid today! Limitless energy
inB4 that was WY objective all along.

>>214292011
But the atheist chud read the Gospels and hastily tried to map the surface ideas and events into the alien universe, can you blame him?
Jesus wanted to give people the blood, to keep them away, it restored him to life. He was constantly insisting that he directly came from the "heavens" and all his authority and justification is from there etc.

>>214281659 (OP)
Last episode was really disappointing. No one gives a fuck what happened on the ship. It's totally non-consequential to the story. Total filler slop.

>>214292059
They already had the episode produced, probably wanted to release it as episode 1. Production nerfs or something caused them to reshuffle it.
All the ep. 1 flashbacks are identical to the last episode scenes.

>>214291961
>50 times bigger in a day without eating
how do we know this for sure? we've seen them grow on spaceships, which are full of food. they also kill people and they can practically eat a person from the inside out with its inner mouth tongue.

>>214291997
Oh, you're just an idiot then.

>>214292081
Now if he got the food sources that's a bit more plausible. I was shocked at how quick bone teeth grew on my kitten as he grew for example, they have a ridiculously fast metabolism.

>>214292069
I think they figured it would be really dumb to introduce a bunch of characters and then kill them all off after the first episode. Doesn't exactly leave the audience yearning for more.

>>214292081
In Alien it ate the ships food stores.

>>214292097
yea probably that, changed in the edit/screening or writers deciding to create suspense, character development in another order

clearly the way it was edited now makes you yearn for more so it was "saved" in the edit

it's a bad show yet I crave to finish it, very rare

>>214292081
>how do we know this for sure?
Because "we" have watched Alien, duh.

>b-but my headcanon and speculation!
Might as well go with >>214292016

>>214292091
Good argument and nice projection, dude.

>>214292111
haha you're such a retard

>>214292106
He didn't.

>>214292121
go check your tendies, you might've messed up the microwave timers
don't come back

>>214292123
Xhe did

>>214289881
>if the maginot's crew were trained and competent xeno hunters rather than braindead civilians with at best 3 tard wranglers as their security the show wouldnt have happened
why are people praising this retarded slop

>>214292137
Show us the scene.

The xenomorph is a tranny allegory. And it's powerful.

>>214291626
i see an injured cat incapable of feeling pain.
what now, nigger?
eye guy didn't go for the saboteur or the annoying guy that was shot in the zoolab.

So far I'd rank the episodes 1>2>3>4>5
Yes it's just getting worse each episode and the last one was just a flashback of which we've seen half of already. Series started as an 8 l, but reality is that it's more of a 5-6 at the end sadly

>>214292157
But is it brave?

>>214292163
To me the first two maybe three with a stretch were equal and that's so typical of shows.
The first three episodes are usually done the first and then get a pause.
60% of the last ep had great production value so it was probably ep. 1 originally

>>214292163
1>2>5>3>4
I actually dont know if 3 was better than 4 or 4 was better than 3. Both were completely forgettable filler.

>>214292146
>if the prometheus' crew were trained and competent rather than braindead top and earth's most expensive scientists and experts with at best 3 tard wranglers as their security the flick wouldn't have happened
Why are people praising this retarded slop?

shows were a mistake, we should've limited ourselves to movies and delegate the rest to books and comics

>>214291961
just wait for the eggmorphingfags
alien can just capture some random physiology creature of of various sizes and mass and transmute it into a spec compliant egg of its kind
how would it morph a space jockey, a chunk of its biomass would fall off and transform into an egg?
a human just so happens to be the perfect size?
what powers the transformation?
how does it alter the cells into specific role?
how does it keep the victim alive in the process?
it doesn't? how can the transformation happen so fast?
how do the individual cells stay nourished in the process?
what powers the egg in it's standby mode?
blah blah

>>214292196
I blame free satellite TV for this madness.

>>214292196
But you all hated Covenant and Romulus.

>>214292096
>Now if he got the food sources that's a bit more plausible
it probably did because vessels that go on long isolated voyages are packed to the brim with food anywhere it fits. submarines for example. why else would the xenomorph hide from everyone right up until the point where it grew to its full size? because it was stuffing its face with cereals, electrolyte drinks, canned meat, chocolate and crackers like steve1989MREinfo

>>214292217
>xenomorph hide from everyone right up until the point where it grew to its full size?
goes trough puberty and furiously masturbates non stop

>>214292212
It just works because reasons, OK chud?

>>214292146
Pretty sure the implication is that top scientists wouldn't sign up for a 65 year mission. These people were all undesirables on some level or chose to get away because of something.

>>214292216
Some movies can suck, we should've still limited ourselves to just that.

>>214292192
every complaint about prometheus includes the fact the crew are retarded
not to mention they are an archeologist and alien biologist team looking for signs of another civilization, not to collect a bunch of parasitic and highly dangerous alien species that was the explicit mission of the maginot's crew

dont be so dishonestly retarded anon

>>214292216
Covenant is awful. Romulus has good atmosphere and some good aesthetics, but it's pretty bad overall.

>>214292059
I didn't like the episode but it's consequential because a lot of anons thought that was a crash, not landing by prodigy design, and didn't know the morrow's backstory which reveals his motivations

>>214292274
To be fair everything about his backstory was already revealed before that episode. Yea you had to deduce some things with not so solid probabilities but it was there.

>>214292248
>dont be so dishonestly retarded anon
Oh the ironing!

Chances they have dozens of ships like the Maginot in almost suicide mission, it's little investment that could lead to high profit. Now Prometheus crew being that incompetent is beyond retarded.

>>214292291
Every time you build one of those ships Asia becomes stronger, probably that's why they are the main leaders of the corporations that rule the earth. They're the only bugmen willing to sacrifice countless to refine the minerals for that tech.

>>214292241
morrow did sign and he was a prized employee, with a lot better compensation but still

>>214292274
We didn't need a whole episode of formulaic Alien slop for that

>>214291940
it's Steve

>>214292309
He's just a security grunt though with a robot arm (and enhanced brain function I guess?)

>>214292163
2>3>4>1>5

>>214292011
The black goo is the only retarded thing you mentioned

>>214292342
if that was the case why was he personally asigned to this mission by Grandma Yutani, whose granddaughter even commented in an earlier episode that he was her favorite

>>214292216
I don't hate covenant, just romulus and prometheus
but they're all not canon

>>214292309
>he was a prized employee
Agreeable. He's really grateful to Yutani for "curing" his polio but chances Yutani had thousands of guys like him. Now after his dedication to this mission new-Yutani is truly impressed with him.

>>214292363
Idk the old bitch was retarded lmao

>>214292289
he has an axe to grind with boy faggio tho, that's new

>>214292363
You had more energy than me. I was not going to make that post because I cannot handle zoomers that play with their phones any longer, they're constantly angry and think they know better and insist with their retardation no matter what.

>>214292412
Are these "zoomers" in the room with you, right now?

>>214292412
your mom is a zoomer

>>214292226
>wendys xeno growing in containment grows frustated because it cant since its watched 24/7
>scapes in order to finally be able to goon in peace
Damn, truly humans were the real monsters

>>214292363
he was probably giving her the black dick and we find out the daughter that died was a cross breed of hers and yutani killed her because she didnt want a half mongrel kid

>>214292412
It’s just “rage bait” man ignore them from now on and you will could help 4chan heal

>>214292226
>>214292587
So that's why the xenomorph has a penis shaped head. Maybe that's why the bald coomer engineers worshipped the xenomorph. It's the ultimate gooner. The engineers wanted to harness its power.

>>214281659 (OP)
I’m actually impressed by this so far. Expectation was near zero to be fair. But I think they avoided a lot of pitfalls with this idea. I wasn’t sure they could carry it for more than a couple of episodes (mini movie). Focusing on the corpo wars is good. Having more aliens is very good, and some interesting designs as well. But I think the android/cyborg thing is really the gem here.

The xeno is made a bit of a bitch but the mystery was wrung out of that shit by Aliens so acting like it’s some major loss or that they should keep it mysterious is retarded. You can’t restore it or put the genie back in the bottle. It’s just another alien monster now and in this show literally.

It’ll be interesting to see how far they can avoid making Xenos the star of the show simply because they’re marketable (this sunk the Ridley Scott sequels essentially, studio mandates more Xenos).

Best case more Bonus Situation corpo espionage and android existentialism. Worst case: Xeno learns to talk and argues for having just as much right to exist and how they need to start a queen egg to save their species.

>>214291427
Uh yes please?
Related to that note: read The Laundry Files.

I'm rooting for this character's success. He was pulling some Toy Story shenanigans in the last episode.

>>214292991
>I’m actually impressed by this so far. Expectation was near zero to be fair. But I think they avoided a lot of pitfalls with this idea. I wasn’t sure they could carry it for more than a couple of episodes (mini movie). Focusing on the corpo wars is good. Having more aliens is very good, and some interesting designs as well. But I think the android/cyborg thing is really the gem here.

I know you're a shill but let me break down why you're wrong because everything hee is not from an Alien fan.

1.Alien has never been about “corpo wars” Weyland-Yutani has always been the sinister background force. Making corporate politics front and center turns a survival-horror franchise into Space Succession.

2.Flooding the screen with random alien variants dilutes the fear and mystery, you can add all the fucking variants and plants you want but it does nothing to boost the aliens

3. The Alien lifecycle is already establishedand there's infinite things they could do with it. Ticks, eyeballs, moths, testicle plants or whatever else just makes it feel like Pokémon, not Alien.

4. The Alien films already explored synthetic morality “the gem” of the show yet another robot storyline isn’t innovation. Worse, it risks overshadowing the actual monster and actually if you watch the episodes thats exactly what its doing!

If everyone’s already familiar with aliens, android conspiracies, and corpo wars before Ripley even shows up, her fight in Alien and Aliens makes zero sense. She goes from groundbreaking heroine to someone just repeating history.

>>214283604
He probably selected her as a potential host and wanted to keep her alive, or he knew that if everyone dies he would be fucked

>>214293357
>alien fan
What the fuck does that even mean? One movie is iconic, the sequel is good but changes genre and makes a hash of the Xeno. The rest is is just sad leftovers.

>Alien is not about
Because you want the same thing over and over and over forever. Except what makes Aliens a go to reference for sequels was doing something different.

>Waaah there’s other aliens
You can’t do “the mystery”. It was removed in Aliens. They’ve gone from eldritch horror to big bugs (that die by the bucketload) in two movies.

>alien lifecycle
Jesus Christ you’re legitimately retarded. There’s not even one coherent lifecycle in the canon. Infinite things to do with an egg, facehugger and xenomorph (or are we counting queens and hybrids as they were already out of ideas by then?). List them. List 10 novel ideas to do with this lifecycle. Should be easy.

> Alien films already explored synthetic morality
They really didn’t. And saying this while promoting “endless” storytelling about an egg cycle is a joke.

>>214293357
>you're wrong because everything here is not from an Alien fan
Anon it was clear in the first couple episodes that the show is merely featuring the Alien creature. Even the credits just pathetically say "Based on elements created by Dan O'Bannon and Ron Shusett". Elements? lmao. If you're still watching for HR Giger's Alien, you're just gonna be disappointed.

>>214293584
>Anon it was clear in the first couple episodes that the show is merely featuring the Alien creature. Even the credits just pathetically say "Based on elements created by Dan O'Bannon and Ron Shusett". Elements? lmao. If you're still watching for HR Giger's Alien, you're just gonna be disappointed.
WHY MAKE IT THEN?

Why did the eyeball squid try to warn the black chick?

>>214293645
Economy's fuckin fucked, mate. Big studios are basically making nothing except franchise slop exploiting pre-established IP, more so than usual.

>>214293690
Eyechad was distracting her so the space tick could shit out its young in her drinking water. It was cooperating in a prison break.

>>214293727
actually Eye-lene as we like to call was actually trying to warn her

>>214293757
call her*

>>214293757
Why in fuck would it warn her?

>>214293757
Eye-lene is cute! Cute!

>>214293797
Why would team up with the fucking ticks to kill her?

>>214282071
People may have thought Morrow was the protag instead of Wendy (as it should have been).

Watching episode 5 and this crew is the most retarded crew ever. They keep fucking everything up.
Security bro should have put everyone awake into crypsleep

>>214282700
That was already obvious since we were explicitly told it was intelligent while we saw its waves, and later when it took over the sheep.

>>214293797
Same reason it was fighting the xenomorph, to protect potential hosts. We don't know how rapidly it burns through them, I don't think.

>>214291560
>it ends up getting killed though
they will do an asspul for the next season like baby yoda. the eyeball is one of the few things that audience likes. they are going to milk her

>>214291358
wendy can already kill a xeno without any help from the eye or anyone else

>>214293875
>most diverse crew in the alien franchise
>most retarded
bravo noah

>>214293849
You're asking why a captive would want its jailor dead?

the maginot should have had a captured engineer on board in addition to the other aliens

>>214292011
Alien was always about Androids and corpo drama. It only used to be subtle about it.

>>214281698
fits well with the majority of the alien franchise, then

>>214293981
thats like saying do fish want their owner dead, make it make sense

so how the fuck were these useless idiots able to get xenomorph eggs, ticks, the eye, and the other creatures without getting themselves ALL killed immediately (not just a couple of unseen men, off-screen, but ALL)?
that's the single most incredible thing the show wants us to believe so far

>>214294089
Fish aren't intelligent enough. The eye's level of intelligence is still being determined between what characters say about it and its behavior that we're shown.

>>214294097
actually very good point they've lost a lot of people getting these things apparently so why are they not in mourning for their crew, there should be a more sombre atmosphere and more fear around the ship, noahs a fucking hack

She's my Eyefu

>>214294150
she's only 2000 years old, you sick fuck

>>214294148
Nobody acts normally in this. Hermit just witnessed a killing machine chasing him, and later killing dozens in like 3 seconds flat, saw a fag cut in half crawling on the floor, got saved at the very last second. And the next scene when he wakes up he is just strolling normally as if none of that had even been real. Like he was just shopping on a Saturday morning, reminiscing about his childhood.

>>214294150
the whole idea of this alien and the way it works (shapeshifting eyeball that can split into multiple eyeballs) is silly and it looks like it's out of futurama, but somehow i've never been annoyed by it. it's ridiculous but i suppose i have to accept that.

>>214293463
>ocellus took one look at her and noted she's so dumb that if she became a host to it it'd be an improvement

>>214293797
My hope is that Eyelene is not an entirely malevolent creature like a xenomorph, even though it's entire biology and what it can do with it is pretty horrific. It would make for an interesting character and I'm sure Wendy will be able to talk to it. It doesn't actually need to infect a host to eat or to hunt, I don't think that's how it even eats, but like anything it has a survival instinct. So far it's attacks and infections are:

>the cat which was already dead, unclear motive, maybe hiding
>attack on the redhead android girl, could it sense that she was artificial? There were others there that could help her defend herself as well, maybe it was just to scare them off and it didn't want to host her, or maybe it did
>the sheep at the Prodigy facility, it hesitated but infected the sheep shortly after it was "offered". It strategizes and analyzes and never acts out of hunger, just like Frank Semyon
>it had an opportunity to attack and host the biologist, and the captain, on the ship, when she hid in the lab for a few seconds with the captain, but it didn't
>it hosted the Russian only to attack the xenomorph, and was surprisingly effective at slowing it down by targeting it's weak spots, which we've never seen before. Here Eylene showed that she can mimic "animal" calls, through the human, another testament to her intelligence.

Up until now for 50 years in the Alien franchise, in Human v Xeno CQB situations, the human always loses in half a second but here thanks to Eyelene a human being actually held his own. Eyelene also knocked out the captain unconscious before the fight and she had a few more minutes to live as a result.

>>214293875
>Watching episode 5 and this crew is the most retarded crew ever
Probably a comment on DEI.

>>214294185
It's the only thing I like about the show so far. I get your point. It should be the most ridiculous thing, but also feels like the only thing in the show that works for me.

>>214294196
>>attack on the redhead android girl, could it sense that she was artificial? There were others there that could help her defend herself as well, maybe it was just to scare them off and it didn't want to host her, or maybe it did

the twist is the older kids are kids who were in comas, and they transfered the minds into them, not machines, thats why eyelene was able to sense it could use that body

>>214294239
>Probably a comment on DEI.
thats not the disney playbook though and noah is on their side

>>214294148
>so why are they not in mourning for their crew
I'm assuming everyone in the future are schizoids. They even joked about the black cyborg's underwear shortly after one of them accidentally murdered a guy by cutting into a facehugger's tail causing the acid to eat through his throat.

>>214294159
>she's only 2000 years old, you sick fuck
Tell me more about her.
I skimmed earlier episodes, did they get into details about Eye-lene that I missed?

>>214294260
wtf source

>>214294288
>accidentally murdered a guy by cutting into a facehugger's tail causing the acid to eat through his throa
How is it that a group of so-called "highly trained scientists" is dumber than some space truckers in the middle of bumfuck nowhere?

>>214293645
Still waiting for your “endless” ideas of what to do using just the alien lifecycle, cunt.

>>214294306
To be fair, they were lucky that Ash cutting into the facehugger not only didn't kill Kane, but also that the acid didn't eat through the entire hull killing them all.

>>214294260
I don't understand. The procedure was the same for everyone.

>>214294314
wdym

>>214294314
use them on animals, having it go on the sheep could have dfinally given me my bull alien toy i had 27 years ago

other than that loads of things they could have experimented with the actual space jockey

>>214294361
Saved. Thank you anon <3

>>214281659 (OP)
Why did Irene attack the doctor?

>>214294196
I think they’re telegraphing pretty hard that the Eye is morally grey at least and maybe even good. They have’t shown it outright killing so it may just be skinriding bodies.
It clearly warns the woman about danger in this episode, to no clear personal gain (taps the glass to alert her about the centipede aliens).

Being able to communicate with Xenos might give the bridge to have humans understand something about their inner world which is extremely precarious ground.

>>214293357
See, this is one of the biggest issues with the show; the whole "human transcendence" and "multiple alien creatures" thing, combined with the generic corpo wars shit, makes it feel like 3 different rejected sci-fi series pitches that got lumped in to the Alien IP, so what we're left with is an amalgamated maelstrom of things that don't flow naturally into each other whilst the titular xeno gets sidelined for some proxy nepotism bullshit fo which barely anyone is watching.

>>214294405
>It clearly warns the woman about danger in this episode
According to the director it was actually trying to distract her so the ticks could escape more easily.

>>214294346
>dude what if the aliums was slightly bigger because it spawned from a bull
Wow the endless ideas indeed. You see a full series of this, yeah?
>dude what if it spawned from a cat and was like super agile
>dude what if a bird and the xeno was FLYING
Dude! Woah! Such amazing stories to tell.

>>214294429
where does the director say that

>>214294150
Guys I'm seriously crying right now.

>>214294429
For real? Slightly disappointed if that’s the case. It looked at least ambiguous.

>>214294184
He also quite literally reminisced on his childhood looking at that baseball when he was in ship with the murder machine
Maybe Hermit just has some sort of meta awareness that he's got several layers of plot armor on

>>214294433
>dude what if a bird and the xeno was FLYING
this needs to happen in the show, sounds legitimately scary

>>214294464
I call bullshit until source is posted, like a video interview or an article.

>>214294433
the only story worth telling after the first move was the one about space jockey, but ridley is senile, he needs a good writer with lindelof was not, and ultimately fumbled its execution so horribly they didn't even greenlit his final movie
then again, after decades of butchering the IP, coupled with all the normalfag expectations he didn't have much to work with
>>214294451
nta but in some podcast iirc

>>214294433
>>214294346
Actually I just realized you’re literally proposing what Gremlins 2 mocked.
A bat Xeno! A fruit Xeno! An electric Xeno born from a computer! What if the Xeno drank brain juice and got super smart?

>>214294346
>use them on animals
The shelved "Operation Aliens" cartoon (along with its associated Kenner toyline) from the early 90s was an attempt at showing different hybrids at least, yet for some reason, Noah Hawley wanted to tell a story about 12 year olds in adult-shaped bodies surrounded by actual adults who act like retards.

>>214294429
I am going with my headcanon on this.
Eyefu was clearly trying to help.
She just doesn't think like we do.
That's why she knocked the jeeta out, and attacked the xeno, but didn't attack the cyborg.

>>214294511
A scorpion Xeno! A Xeno with horns! What if the Xeno had wings? SO MANY EPIC STORIES WOOOW ENDLESS DEPTH

>>214294511
I have the Predator and Alien in the back middle. The head broke off the Predator though

>>214294501
>nta but in some podcast iirc
A director giving answers to speculation and spoiling stuff is so stupid. This show doesn't a lot of things to talk about as is.

>>214294429
This is one example of where the 'autuer' is wrong about their creation. Eye Pod Nano is something of s an alien scientist themselves, they were merely pointing out errors in the science officers methodology. Everything they/them has done backs this up.

>>214294501
>the only story worth telling after the first move was the one about space jockey
this. there should've been a movie where an angry space jockey elephant gets awakened from his armchair and starts chasing the humans with a rolled up newspaper around the derelict ship

>>214281659 (OP)
Why does this feel like it was written by grok?

>>214294587
kino

>>214294511
How about a smart alien and he sings 'hello my baby hello my darling hello my rag time gal' while dancing a jig IT'S IN THE MOVIE

>>214294511
It’s because Hollywood hates sincerity and making boring stories about robots that aspire to be human is the least fucking sincere thing you can do. It’s peak narcissism: it reframes questions about existence into “humans like me are the highest and best form of everything”. It’s a retard’s idea of a smart plot.

>>214294594
@grok is this true?

>>214294666
Woah, there! Let’s step back for a sec and delve into what makes the show “tick”, haha. Keeping things fun, here.

>>214294594
>Why does this feel like it was written by grok?
Because it pretends to be smart when it's actually catered towards dumb invalids who want to pretend like they're smart, like Angry Joe giving every episode an 8/10 - 10/10 & labeling all the commenters calling out his bullshit as "Trump supporters" for criticizing it.

>>214294635
There is a non-zero chance this show is about Wendy deciding lil xeen and eye lean are more worthwhile role models/companions than BK or any humans, and she goes full singularity before never land is nuked or they all get off-world.

Just finished marathoning the wiki synopsis. this show is 10/10

>>214294690
>labeling all the commenters calling out his bullshit as "Trump supporters" for criticizing it.
...so, when this series inevitably gets cancelled for its abysmally low viewership ratings, what will be the excuse?
>It was MAGA that got it cancelled!
>You just didn't give it a CHANCE!
>You just hate women!
>You hate black people!
>You hate diversity!
So far, this shitshow's just the Alien equivalent to Rings of Power. It's just boring and nonsensical so far, an extension of hack Hollywood writing in a nutshell. Noah Hawley nailed Fargo only because the Coen Brothers supervised him throughout. With Alien, there's no creative leash, and it shows.

>>214294752
How about LEGION though?

Full Hawley, too Hawley?

>>214294731
New banner?

>>214294752
Ironically, the show's actually doing better on piracy sites than on Hulu right now.

Aliens >>>>>>>>>>>>> Alien Earth episode 5 >>>> Alien 1979 >>>>>>>>> all the rest of the franchise >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Alien Covenant

>>214294752
>You hate black people!
Ironic as Morrow is one of the highlights of this show

>>214294752
It’s way better than Kangz of Power; you can tell that people who genuinely like the IP are working on it and trying to compensate for the abysmal writing.

>"we want to see xenomorphs we havent seen before!"
>A:E shows baby xeno and the teen xeno phases of xenomorph growth, which no media showed before
>"reeeeeee not like that"
Tough crowd huh

>>214295338
how is he still alive with that giant metal bar through his head? wouldn't a metal bar that thick kill a person if impaled through the head like that?

The audience score's stuck at 71% for a few weeks, almost as if they froze it. Should've dropped into the 60s by now.

>>214295243
>you can tell that people who genuinely like the IP are working on it and trying to compensate for the abysmal writing.
I'll give the show credit for the set design; they nailed the look and feel of the 1979 film at least.
The dialogue, internal logic, and story make zero sense thus far & Noah Hawley needs to hire an actual writer.

few more new threads until this final alien earth thread gets buried in the archive.
see you next week.

>>214295301
>>A:E shows baby xeno and the teen xeno phases of xenomorph growth, which no media showed before
We know what chestbursters are. The CGI looks like ass, however. Oh, and the tadpole thing wasn't impressive either.

>>214293176
I hope he escapes in the season finale and starts his own corporation in season 2

>>214294148
>off screen deaths of crew members while capturing the creatures
>ectoparasite wrapped around two of their crew members faces
>captain dead by acid burns
The business as usual attitude sure was odd. Pretty sure normal humans would start shitting bricks in a situation like this.

>>214295666
Finally the catalog can be filled with pepes again what a relief

>>214294429
it's evident by the montage and the way the tick was trying to crawl out on the side of container she had in clear view until she got distracted

>>214295614
doomcock and nerdrotic should have been executed, that's what should have happened.

>>214295691
So you're saying the eyeball gets into the Boy Wonder next episode, interesting. The gamerdads are gonna shit themselves