Thread 215238392

Realistically speaking, what would you do in this situation?

>say something looks cheap
>Hammond rushes immediately to shout how much he spent on it
>diversion tactic
>raptors now eat Hammond

It would have been cool to see a shotgun to a dinosaurs face with 90s practical effects

turn and blow the lizard away at point blank range with superior reflexes

>>215238392 (OP)
Turn, blast, blow.

I would've killed them before shutting down the entire system. Just to make sure.

>>215238392 (OP)
Without turning my head, slowly point the rifle in her direction and pull the trigger.

yell "CUT!"

>>215238392 (OP)
>We could do it that way. You try to attack me, I try to defend myself... see where things go from there... we could do that. Or you could turn back and vanish somewhere in the thick of the woods.

>>215238392 (OP)
I wouldn't do anything. I would listen, which is what nobody did.

>>215238392 (OP)
I would yell "6-7", cup my hands at it, then turn 380 degrees and "weapons run" the f*ck out of there!

>>215238392 (OP)
Compliment the dinosaur on its intelligence

>>215239044
>You know, for a dinosa- ACK

>>215238392 (OP)
>What do I do lord?
Destroy the child

>>215238392 (OP)
say 'clever girl' and then let myself get eaten

>>215238392 (OP)
do a 360 and sun walk out of there

lay down a suppressive fire with the incinerators and fall back by squads to the APC

>>215238392 (OP)
>realistically
idk mane, if I wait for my lunch to shit, but it's wearing cloth pants, I've got two options 1) let my bros get the bottom half even though I'm not goin to be the first one to hit him but they'll smell the shit, too or 2) try to be honorable and strike at the shorts with the doo doo but risk streaking and smearing it all over the good and thick meaty parts of the meal - now who wants that, realistically speaking?

>>215238392 (OP)
Jump several hundred feet in the air and land many miles away

>>215238838
I will never not laugh at this regardless of however many times I see it and despite it being the first thing I thought of when I saw the title of the thread.

>>215240686
>manson
>is son of man
the guy was ahead of his time

>>215238847
no cap blud dead ass on god fr fr

When will we get a Dino Crisis movie?

>>215241483
when autists make it themselves with generative AI. hollywood is doomed!

>>215238838
the dinosaur was hungry, retard.

>>215238838
this never gets old

>>215238392 (OP)
Okay, so here are my options. A, quickly duck sideways, dodge the claw, then take him out with a spinning back kick,
or B, take the claw in the face, then roll on the ground and die.

start babbling about NFTs or whatever

>>215241483
why didn't they just go in the chopper and leave?

>>215238392 (OP)
I would remind the velociraptor that according to science it's only 2 feet tall an weighs 25 pounds, then kick it to death.

>>215238392 (OP)
I would pretend to start yawning and keep closing my hand in front of its face to distract it.

>>215238392 (OP)
I wouldn't say a single word to them. I would listen to what they have to say, and that's what no one did.

>>215238392 (OP)
In the single second he used to say "clever girl" he could've just shot her.

>>215239643
SAY AGAIN, ALL AFTER INCINERATORS

>>215238392 (OP)
Eat Bob Peck. Why is this even a question?

>>215241839
Too slow Anon.

>>215238526
>blow.
Do dinosaurs have dicks?

Shoot the one I already have the gun aimed at, then turn and shoot the surprised one while it’s distracted and mourning

>>215238693
He says over and over to kill them. Seriously. THIS is the play
>Begs someone to shot and kill the raptor in the start, no one does they keep shocking her
>First thing he says when he meets the doctors visiting the island is the raptors should be destroyed
>When Nedry's program is running he immediately asks if the raptor fences are down, which they are not
>Call for a system reboot, he does nothing

Kill the raptors before the reboot. Saves 2 lives.

>>215238392 (OP)
Probably eat the guy before he shoots my friend

>>215238392 (OP)
Why are the raptors smart? Has any reptile ever exhibited any signs of high intelligence?

>>215243303
Their brainpans are super-elongated.

>>215238838
i started this meme

>>215238392 (OP)
Honestly would just be dead. I would try to start break dancing and raping as fast as possible.

>>215243303
first of all, they are birds not reptiles. 2nd of all a crow is a tool using apex predator, if it was 6ft tall we'd be in big poodoo

>>215243340
I love you m8

>>215238392 (OP)
Point my finger at something past her and yell "OH MY GOD WHAT'S THAT??" and when she turns around to look I'll SHOOT HER!

>>215238392 (OP)
I wouldn't have done anything. I would have listened for the raptors, and that's what nobody did.

>>215238392 (OP)
realize I needed my elephant gun backups nearby
>pic related

>>215238392 (OP)
>instinktual self-defecation defense mode
>Flail and smear about
>Chase fleeing raptor
>Shidd and fart in primal victory

>>215238512
>turn and blow the lizard away at point blank range with superior reflexes

it's not emphasized as much in the movie but a huge part of the book is how people are always amazed by the swiftness of the dinosaurs, how their reflexes are more akin to birds than lizards. from that distance muldoon was already dead.

>>215238847
>6-7

Are zoomers stealing Gen Alpha memes now

Realistically speaking, dinosaurs aren't real and they couldn't make them come back from bones. So in this situation, I would just walk out of the place and have a nice coffee and sandwich!

>>215238392 (OP)
Seduce her and become the alpha of the pack.

>>215243256
To be fair, each dinosaur costs tens of millions of dollars. Sure he would advocate caution, but if he took the initiative and killed one while the system was still secure, he'd be fucked financially for the rest of his life. It was only after the raptors got out that it became fair game to kill them.

Hindsight is 20/20, but he really should've shot the other further raptor instead of trying to shoot the one next to him. He was already fucked, might as well take one down with him.

>>215238392 (OP)
Offer it my leftover chili and bass

>>215238742
Exactly what I thought too anon. It's not watching the gun that it has no evolutionary reference for. Its watching the eyes.

>>215243168
Yeah actually Even if it's not pointed at it that 12 gauge is pretty loud. I bet you if you blast it off around right there it would shocked enough to break its concentration or even make it retreat suddenly. Depending on its experience with guns already.

I would have run for the shed and left Ellie with the gun

>>215238392 (OP)
Say "sexy girl" instead and seduce her with my charms

OG Raptors really are nightmare fuel
>Looks like komodos but has much higher metabolism
>Cheetah speed
>Ambush hunters that always blindside you
>"You're alive when they eat you"

>>215245009
>>215241483
Is this AI? What is this from?

>>215238392 (OP)
Tell her she’s courting death with the calm serenity of a calm picture of a particularly calm ocean.

>>215238392 (OP)
I leverage Zeno's paradox of "Achilles and the tortoise" to run away from the raptor indefinitely and it never eats me.

>>215238392 (OP)
Make them kiss with AI

>>215238838
Extremely charming meme

>>215243340
I wrote the original YWNBAW post.

>>215238392 (OP)
Get on the floor and walk the dinosaur

>>215246813
What are you on about? The movie mentioned several times that the dinos are fast and warm blooded and the characters are surprised by it

>brachio reveal, grant says to throw away the book on coldbloodedness
>hammond saying the T-rex can reach 35mph
>baby raptor hatching, sattler is surprised at how it can hold its temp
>muldoons quote on raptor's cheetah speed

>>215245812

I'm sure that will work out well.

>>215238838
Fuck, it's good every time. One of those things I'll randomly chuckle about during the day.
>>215243340
A gentleman and a scholar.

>>215241483
JPIII was very Dino Crisis like, minus the guns.
But faggots hated it and now we're stuck with World slop that nobody but browns and trannies like because they have no standards.

>>215238392 (OP)
Establish dominance.
>Down! Stay! Stay!

>>215238392 (OP)
Instant transmission kamehameha behind the raptor

>>215238392 (OP)
side kick him with my giga chad legs

>>215238392 (OP)
Immediately turn left and do an uppercut. According to paleontologists, most dinosaurs have very weak chins and could easily be knocked out.

>>215248980
I don't like how far AI has come

>>215238392 (OP)
I would listen to what it has to say, and that's what no one did.

>>215238838
jej

>>215241483
I just can't get scared of giant chickens. Chickens are not scary. Dinosaurs did not have feathers. Its all so tiresome.

>>215241483
>le epic and sad slowmo
This is so ass.

>>215238392 (OP)
Can we just settle down and talk about this?

>>215251956
That's probably because you've had no actual life experiences, so post from the perspective of someone that literally cannot hold a different viewpoint if you haven't experienced it before. Get chased down by a cassowary or an ostrich, fuck even just a big angry goose, then you might start to comprehend what a "giant chicken" could do to you.

>>215252184
Not him, but you're a cum guzzling redditor and the cassowary has only been capable of killing a kid and an old man.

>>215252209
>Not him, but you're a cum guzzling redditor and the cassowary has only been capable of killing a kid and an old m-ACK

>>215252260
Imagine unironically admitting you're afraid of a cock.

>>215252209
kek saved

>>215252209
First, you're a fucking spastic, I didn't say anything about cassowaries killing people.
Second, you're a fucking retard, I also mentioned ostriches.
Third, you're a fucking mongoloid, I said compare those animals to something twice their weight/size and you'd start to get an idea of what a dinosaur could do.

Got it? You waste of space cunt that needs to back.

>>215252313
Yikes, I hit a nerve, didn't I? Calm down, featherfag, get that thong out your bussy.

>>215238392 (OP)
Like they do in the new films.

>>215252327
Wow, you really are stupid. No, the point is that you missed entirely. Try to talk in terms that aren't memes, you massive gay shite.

>>215252352
There's nothing gayer than a featherfag, sweaty.

>>215252364
Cool, memes is all you got, get fucked you worthless loser.

>>215252377
Is that an invitation? No way, fag. Get your shit taste away from me.

>know I'm about to die
>come up with memorable quip in case someone is filming

>>215238392 (OP)
>Use the grape, mate!

>it's another featherfag having a melty episode
I hate reruns.

>>215238392 (OP)
I would listen, and that’s what nobody did

>>215243340
I believe you. Me and my friends started the “seaking fuck yeah!” meme over 20 years ago

>>215248980
me and my dog

>>215247792
Gangs of New York

>>215251956
>I just can't get scared of giant chickens
You should be. A regular little ass rooster can slit your throat if you aren’t careful. Now imagine that but with like 300 lbs on you

>>215252260
I know it’s probably a family pet but realistically if this was in the wild she could just kick it and it would be dead

>>215252488
I'm sure this sounds extremely scary if you're a limp dick liberal.

>>215238838
this was so unexpected so you really got me lol

>>215252614
I expect it everytime and it always makes me laugh it’s so fucking stupid

>>215238838
Nicely done.

>>215252733
I dunno to me it feels kind of stock

>>215252209
What the fuck is it with modern dino faggots and their obsession with mentioning the cassowary anyway

>>215238392 (OP)
Run,
These things couldn't run 100m without gassing completely.
That works in a world where nothing else can run a mile without dying.
This is why mammals rule the world.

>>215252785
Probably got it from some goytuber.

>>215252488
I'll take my chances.

>>215252488
roosters can not slit your throat. I've had Chickens for 15 years. the most aggressive cocks with the largest talons barely posed a serious risk to anyone besides maybe small children. they jump kick but it never amounts to anything more than a scratch. To small kids they could get hit in the eye. Ostrich, Cassowary and Emu can do some damage. Ostrich especially because they are fuck huge and mega strong. They can carry adults on their back and still sprint.

>>215238392 (OP)
Easy I would have made proximity chain guns and placed them outside of the bunker not walk into the jungle to hunt them

>>215238392 (OP)
Say something iconic

>>215248980
kek

>>215252785
Weird trend I noticed, too. Back in the day we used to just talk about the dinosaurs themselves, not any fucking reddit birds.

>>215238838
this is great
thank you for this

>>215252966
They're based on Deinonychus and Michael Crichton just thought "Velociraptor" sounded cooler, holy fuck, how do people still not know this? Crichton explained it in the book when it first came out, it was never supposed to be a secret either.

>>215238392 (OP)
>pic related
show my true power level 9000

>>215247792
>>215251956
The movie is called Primitive War.

Who will they cast as Regina in a Dino Crisis movie?

>>215254361
NTA but how is it? I read like the first half of the book, and thought it was merely okay and lacked anything special to keep me reading. It was a military dinosaur book that wasn't an especially good military book, nor an especially good dinosaur book.

>>215254433
For a movie with a 7 Million USD budget (Last Jurassic World had 450 Million in comparison) the dinosaurs look pretty good. The story is generic and maybe takes itself too seriously considering the premise but I watched with low expectations and thought it was not bad.