Avada Kedavra

I reflect it with a mirror

>>717255624 (OP)
*disapperates*

He said calmly

>>717255624 (OP)
DEH!

>>717255624 (OP)
Avadeh Kedavra

>>717255624 (OP)
Why didn’t he just make more Horcruxes?

>harry potter game
>running around the school grounds casting n-words and r-words
>nobody bats an eye
Modern gaming was a mistake. It's all just potemkin villages with zero depth.

Deh!

>>717257586
kek

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/yUjCG_KcWHs

they hype him up for the entire series and all he can do is just some ghost buster laser beam shit

Why didn't mcgonnagal just stretch her legs towards the nearest gunstore and buy the students defending Hogwarts some weapons?

>>717257717
What did you expect from one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>>717257717
guns would less effective against wands
>>717258049
holy copypasta retard. No one's gonna read this trash for the millionth time

>>717255624 (OP)
The dark lord if he was fucking badass and shit

>>717257717
fantasy series, you have to pretend it makes sense

Imagine having a ballsack and watching/reading this fantasy for little girls

>>717255624 (OP)
Immunity dog, bitch.

>>717257717
Because magic means guns shoot confetti.

>>717255624 (OP)
"I worked at Blizzard for 7 years" edit when?

>>717255624 (OP)
If anyone can cast it then what’s so special about Voldemort?

I used to read my ex fiancee yaoi harry potter fanfiction out of Ao3 every night until she slept.
I've read about harry being tortured, blind, an universe where he and TOM FUCKING RIDDLE are fallen angels. You fucking name it.
that fundamentally changed me as a person and I don't know how to deal with it.

>>717258556
ayyy

>>717258667
why didn't thing work out?

>>717258134
>guns would less effective against wands
Only if your opponent actually SEES the gun and has time to prepare a counter-spell response against it.
Once the bullet is flying, they can't do jack anymore - because casting time.

>>717258646
He casts it with impunity, since he's literally an unliving eternal lich that doesn't have to give a fuck about 'scarring his soul' and penance in the afterlife anymore. He no longer has an afterlife, period. Courtesy of him having turned himself into a lich to begin with. If he gets ended, he gets ended for good.

>>717258646
It's cultural appropriation if you cast it.

>>717258646
Nothing. The story is about good vs evil. The characters don't matter.

>>717257416
He was very autistic about having 7 horcruxes because of it being a magic number. Any flaw of Voldemort comes down to autism from being conceived through a love potion really.

>>717258759
Distance and her past

>>717255624 (OP)
Abra Kabadra

>>717259487

>>717257416
It is explicitely stated that making one tears your soul apart and every time you make another you get hit with more side effects.
Going up to exactly 7 is optimal for whatever magicowizardry reasons.

>>717259113
Buy he didn't know harry one was. And it is a stretch to consider himself as a houcrux

>>717257586
based

I read all but the last book as a kid. Ended up seeing all the movies though. Recently, I finally read the last book as part of reading with my kid at night before bed. Voldemort's death was, in fact, far better in the book. No magic laser collision. No dramatic crying or disintegration. Harry tried one last time to tell Voldemort to try to act like a human, Voldemort said no, and he fucked his own shit up the exact same way he did when Harry was a baby because he was so delusional as to think he was beyond being mortal. Then he drops like a sack of fucking potatoes. The book even uses the word mundane to describe it. All that braggadocio and bluster didn't mean shit. He was just a dumb bitch and died like one too.

Also, Draco and his bitch of a mom got off too easy.

>>717258782
wizards can teleport and turn invisible. Guns are useless.

>>717258886
Didn't the blond dude's father try cast that shit on Harry the second he slightly inconvenienced him?

>>717259487
>>717255624 (OP)
Split the dif? Abara Cadaver?

>>717260167
I'm pretty sure that's a Powerpuff Girls villain.

>>717259694
His plan was to kill Harry and make his corpse a horcrux as the ultimate proof that he conquered the one who was destined to defeat him. But he failed to kill him and settled instead on making Nagini a horcrux just to please his 7 autism (I misremembered. He just wanted to split his soul into 7 pieces not have 7 horcruxes), however Harry still became a horcrux without Voldemort knowing.
>>717260158
The actor playing him was reading the 4th book and just went with that spell even though it makes no sense

>>717259694
I think a part of him knew Harry was one. But he didnt think one could kill their own soul with the killing curse. I mean it is kind of outlandish otherwise Dumbledore would have used the killing curse on all the others or asked Snape to at least.

>>717255624 (OP)
Dehest dehs deh dehe dehy deh dehie dehs. Deh deh dehing deh deh dehard deh deh dehs deh Dehwarts Dehdemy deh dehey deh dehed dehs deh deh indehable deh deh dehs. Deh deh deh dehy dehery, deh dehs’ deh dehency deh deh dehs deh deh dehment deh indehive deh deh dehial dehs, deh deh deh dehic undehical, deh deh dehtion deh indeh.

Dehs deh deh deh deh deh Dehling dehed deh deh deh Dehlberg dehing deh dehs; deh deh deh deh dehs deh deher deh dehen deh deh deh deh deh deh deht dehthing deh dehbody?deh dehusly dehable deh-dehtion deh deh dehs. Deh Dehry Dehher dehs deh deh anti-Dehtian (deh deh), deh deh’s dehly deh anti-Dehes Dehnd dehs deh dehs deh deh deh, dehty deh dehment. Deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh. Deh, dehfully, deh deh deher deh deh.

>d-deh dehst deh dehs deh deh dehough d-deh
"Deh!"
Deh dehing deh dehful; deh deh deh dehble. Deh deh deh, Deh dehed deh dehry deh deh deher deh deh deh deh, deh dehor deh dehtead deh deh deher "dehed deh dehs."

Deh deh dehing deh deh deh deh deh deh dehry deh deh deh deh dehed. Deh dehed deh deh Deh deh dehed deh deh dehal deh dehs. Deh deh dehlous. Dehling's deh dehs deh dehed deh dehes deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh deh deh deh dehing. Deh Deh deh deh dehish, dehing deh deh Dehry Dehher deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng. Deh deh dehthing deh deh dehect deh, "Deh dehse dehs deh dehing Dehry Dehher deh dehdeh deh dehdeh, deh deh deh deh deher deh deh deh deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng." Deh deh deh deh dehght. Deh deh deh dehing dehic. Deh deh deh "Dehry Dehher" deh deh, deh deh, dehed deh deh Dehphen Dehng.

>>717260081
Good post, I agree.

>>717255624 (OP)
>Scary Nosferatu looking dark lord villain
>He needs a gay magic wand to cast, like a sugarplum fairy
I will never get the appeal of Harry Potter. it makes being a wizard look dorky and lame.

>>717262876

>>717258667
i need a gf to read to autistic harry potter fanfiction to

>>717258667
Did you read her 30H's?

>>717260194
hahahahahaha

>>717263059
Staves and tomes are cool.

>>717263343
They are, but wands aren't.

>>717263226
nah, I only read fics that actually tried to be serious and "good"
I had some fun reading them. Listening to her snore put my heart at ease.
>>717263192
they're out there anon. follow your dreams

>>717265360
I hope you out anything including the phrase
>ancient and noble houses
In the bin immediately, anon.

>>717258667
>>717259476
>Distance and her past
her or "her"?

>>717255624 (OP)
you are courting death, voldemort

>>717266376
biological female

>>717266181
my man, after you've read about harry being raped, chased, tortured, killed, brought back to life, starved, made blind, chased again, eletrocuted, soul-raped, tortured by glass shards, and raped again by TOOM RIDDDLEEE, and still going back for more, these tropes become nothing

>>717255624 (OP)
It's spelled CADavra

>>717257586
/thread

>>717266608
please tell me there is more

>>717263343
For me it's the Regal Scepter

>>717260081
why was Voldemort such an asshole? was he just your text-nook narcissist that thought he was better then everyone and thought he could become immortal?

Why don't wizards use the multiple wands trick? One time in the books, Harry grabs three wands together in one hand and fires them off all at once for a triple spell with triple effectiveness. So we know it's possible. Everyone should be doing that.

>>717255624 (OP)

FLIPENDO

>>717267148
Imo weird and fucked up fetishes might be, well, weird and fucked up, but at least they wear their intentions on their sleeve and have a target audience.
The ancient and noble house shit is just a complete failure of basic reading comprehension, and only done because some other retards did it first.
Some degenerate getting the rocks off at least isn’t stupid enough to add nobility despite the most egotistical rich ponce in the series never even alluding to it once.

>>717267950
It's heavily implied he was born a psychopath because he was conceived via love potion and wasn't born with any natural love. Which makes it weird how casually the books treat love potion because it's risking making more Voldemorts every time someone uses one. I think JK later made one of those bullshit after the fact "corrections" she loves doing to make it more nurture than nature though.

>>717268798
>Voldemort's backstory is an allegory for the dangers of single motherhood

As gross as it sounds, just shitting your pants and using magic to vanish it away was peak efficiency. Installing plumbing in Hogwarts was a step backwards and a sign of just how thoroughly mudblood thought has infected the wizarding world.
>But the first years don't know how to vanish the shit in their pants!
It's incentive to learn quickly.

>>717269512
Why don't you just vanish the shit out of your rectum?

>>717269512
what if your wand breaks and you have to wait for a new one?

>>717269567
purgatio intestinorum

>>717269567
Clearly you want it outside of you or you risk vanishing your organs away with bad aim.
>>717269594
That's what wandless magic is for.

>>717269746
yeah bro just do wandless magic on your first year good luck :^)

>cast the jinx that instantly makes the target violently orgasm in class as a prank

>>717269594
The humiliation of having to ask you peers to wash your ass is good motivation to guard your wand with your life. It teaches responsibility.

>>717257717
Takes place in Britain, guns are banned as are sharp knives.

>>717257717
No guns allowed in bongland

>>717270052
>>717270106
Dursley buys a shotgun in the first book from the RE4 merchant

>>717255624 (OP)
what was his endgame?

>>717263059
Later entries (Pottermore, Legacy, etc.) tell us that wand usage is a heavily western custom (England/USA). Wizards from other regions will use different foci for their spells, or none at all if you're a nigger.

>>717269190
What about the allegories against date-rape drugs?

>>717255624 (OP)
PERRICULUM!

>>717270604
Do Japanese wizards dress like this?

>>717262876
>No Clifford the Big Red Deh

>>717257416
Horcruxes rip your soul apart. Everyone else was too horrified to make more than one.
Keep in mind that this is a world with a confirmed afterlife and ghosts running around. Your soul really matters.

Voldemort was pushing the boundaries of known magic. He had to stop somewhere with horcruxes and since 7 was a magic number he thought that might somehow make him more powerful. He used valuable objects for the same reason. He had no way of knowing what would help because this was such unexplored territory.

Ironically if Voldemort actually did manage to make his planned 7 part soul (1 body+ 6 horcruxes) instead of accidentally splitting into 8 thanks to the fuckup with Harry, he would have been a lot tougher to defeat so maybe he was on to something there with his numbers autism.

>>717262876
LOL

I hope the Hogwarts legacy sequel is more focused on the school persona style rather than whatever the fuck that game was

>>717274429
Once I heard that 3/4 of the game was traipsing around the countryside inside of taking place in the castle I lost all interest in ever playing that game.

>>717257416
Why didn't he just hide one of the horcruxes up his asshole?

Merula!

>>717257717
The reason they don't use man-made weapons is in the fantastic beasts movies. Iirc because they're too devastating and the atom bomb far surpasses the entire wizarding community's might. Something along those lines

>>717258049
This is exceptionally good bait since the movies are good specifically because they aren't the usual hollywood trash

>>717277457
>>Iirc because they're too devastating and the atom bomb far surpasses the entire wizarding community's might.
>nooo muggles are too powerful we can't use their tools
>no wizard tried using magic on modern weapons to improve them
>nobody tried to make a sentient glock
>they mock arthur weasley because at least he's curious about how muggle stuff works
between this, and the whole "we shat on the floor and used magic to make the crap disappear", i'm starting to think wizards are retardedly inbred

>>717267950
>given ultimate power where you can do anything you want
>forced to go to gay retard school and do homework

Yeah I'd snap too

>>717258667
could be worse, I read Fallout Equestria and project horizons

>>717255624 (OP)
Did he look like a snake monster before killing Harry's parents? I can't recall

>>717281582
hey, me too, hahahaha
and murky number 7

>>717283083
He looked extremely fucked up but not yet full snake mode, if I remember right.

>>717255624 (OP)
I block it with a flower, because it's technically alive, it eats the death curse for me

>>717257586
classic

How fucked is the HBO adaptation going to be?

>>717286548
My sister was pissed that they made Snape a nigger

>>717255624 (OP)
>you must be like, really evil and really want to kill the person you are casting this curse upon to actually kill it.
>you must chant the curse name before it even goes off
dude just use a fucking gun at that point

>>717281582
I read The Legend of Zelda: Zelda Vs Terminator

>>717262876
Lmao

>>717281582
But do you have a hardcover copy?