Thread 725183647

*trivializes zombie apocalypse*

>>725183647 (OP)
>gets stuck in a zombie

>>725183728
>thorns build
Why they never work in vidya

>>725183647 (OP)
>Piecre zombies heart
>Zombie does not care because he is a reanimated corpse and immune to pain and bloodloss
>Gets stuck
>You now do not have a weapon
>Zombie mauls you
Not a warhammer.

>>725183728
kirk
knight of tharns

>>725183647 (OP)
the tip seems like it would only get in the way considering you have to bash their heads in
a quarterstave or war hammer seems more practical
also chainmail

>>725183697
>>725183831
>>gets stuck
actual retards

>stay at home for a few days
>zombies starve to death

>>725184392
>virus is airborne
ruh roe

>>725183647 (OP)
Explain.

>>725183647 (OP)
Stabbing through skulls is not as easy as zombie media makes it seem. You would have to stab them in the mouth or under the neck to penetrate. Something blunt would work better in a survival situation.

>>725183647 (OP)
Has any zombie media ever portrayed use of moats as a defence against zombie horde?

>>725184168
>G*rman police is still stuck in the middle ages.
KEK! Imagine if this was the guy who was protecting you from terrorists and murderers. I am so glad I am in America where the police has top of the line guns and not in g*rmany with the police stuck in the middle ages.

>>725183647 (OP)
Why not use a bardiche instead so you can actually behead zombies?

Op here, wrong pic sorry

>>725183647 (OP)
That's not a Katana, which will slash through any zombie like butter with the power of its many thousand fold forging techniques

>>725184529
>Dig a pit
>Fill pit with spinning blade traps
>Make platform above pit
>A human is chilling on the platform to some loud music from his speakers.
>Zombies are drawn to music and head towards the pit.
>Zombies see the human sitting on the platform above the pit
>Zombies move towards the human
>Zombies fall into thepit and get torn apart by the spinning sawblades
>Neighbourhood cleared
The Zombie apocolypse is a meme.

>>725184586
They had to go back to medieval gear due to all the sabbings KEK

>>725183647 (OP)
People aren't made of butter and stabbing something that's just continually shoving its weight into you is going to get very tiring very fast. You'll have to manually push it away with each thrust that doesn't kill since they're, you know, zombies, they're just going to keep swarming - and actually penetrating the head will be very difficult, skulls are quick hard, it'd be like trying to stab through a (thin) layer of brick.

Introducing: the war hammer.
You get range and you just donk them, crushes the skull and destroys the brain effectively, decently low time to kill, and since they'll just crumple you won't be doing a full workout on every zombie.

Military would end a zombie apocalypse in seconds

>>725184716
Sawblade trap needs heavy running water or else even an aircraft carrier's propeller is going to start slowing down after like 5 zombies. Anyone who's used a food processor knows that shoving in a whole steak just immediately jams the machine.

>>725183768
Same reason a dagger deals miserable damage while a dagger irl is fucking scary

>>725183647 (OP)
These things can't stop a boar. How will they stop an undead?

>>725184932
I rarely ever see games have daggers be complete redeemable dogshit. Usually they have obscene critical hit rates, so I'd say that daggers are adequately represented for how deadly they are IRL.

>>725184917
Then replace the sawblades with a huge pit of acid, lava or fire.
Or walk the zombies into a pit of gasoline or flammable material and then throw down molotovs to empty the pit.

>>725184994
Do you have any idea how thick a boar’s hide is? Also their bones are way thicker too. They’re tanks. Boars are usually shown as weak starting zone threats but they’re strong as hell

>>725184932
There are games where daggers are insanely scary, most RPGs have very powerful dps builds with them.
Hovewer, only a few games have a proper "commando with a backup knife" aesthetic like underrail.

Zombie games and movies always have the undead run on magic. A corpse should fall apart in like a week.

>>725184994
Humans are fragile compared to most life. We gave up a lot of strong physical traits for our superior brains.

>>725185142
Delicious superior brains

any weapon which doesn't DESTROY body parts completely would be useless against zombies since they don't have to worry about bleeding out/injuries

>zoomer-tier zombies that are defeated if you destroy the brain or some other nonsense like that
I hate all entertainment that transformed an immortal unstoppable enemy into some retarded punching bag/loot pinata.

>>725185073
The problem when hunting boars with spear is the spear would pierce the boar and the boar would keep charging through the spear and gore you holding it when it reached your end

>>725185196
necromorphs are how zombies should work, even if you take their limbs and head off, they're not dead, just unable to continue pursuit

>>725185196
But that was how they were in Night of the Living Dead the first zombie media

>>725184932
>>725185048
A dagger isn't on the same level as an axe, polearm, hammer/club or even a sword.
Daggers are designed to be short, easy to carry and concealable weapons for civilian self defense, muggers and assassins who need to hide their weapons to be discrete to kill unarmored, unarmed humans exclusively.
If your target is wearing heavy armor, a dagger is gonna do no damage unless you target weakspots in the armor like the face and armpits which is very difficult. If you are fighting an animal or monster, a dagger isn't gonna do enough damage to kill them. Either way, a dagger will always do less damage than an axe, polearm, bludgeon or sword, has much shorter reach and can't be used to block and deflect as well.
Then, for fiction, there is also awesome value. A small short blade isn't very awesome. That's why even bare fists tend to do more damage in most RPGs.

>>725184994
They would stop a regular zombie that's kind of shambling around, taking on zombies that can run or tank a stab because they are muscle freaks would be a bad idea.

Hello sirs how do we cope with the fact that Half Life 3 will release before Project Zomboid?

>>725184994
Pretty sure OP posted a picture of boar-hunting spear, why wouldnt it be able to kill a boar? Its certainly long enough, and sharp cutting edges is not some kind of difficult technology to get right. If its cheaply made its still lethal just less durable to (mis)use.

>>725185183
The way limbs and mechanical motion happens for the human body is still all done by the ligaments. Real zombies would be handicapped by all kinds of lacerations and punctures

>>725183831
>>725183697
>Gets stuck
Wow actual in the flesh retards

>>725185056
>Acid
Heavy acids take hours to dissolve meat off bone.
>Lava
Lava is molten rock, it is so dense that the first wave of zombies are just going to stick on top and the rest just walk over.
>Fire
We went over this with Auschwitz, anon, you need amazingly high temperatures for a very long period of time to even reach acid's level of dissolving, which still isn't good for something unphased by pain.

The sawblade trap is probably the best of them, you just want to set up your murder arena so you're on the shoreline and have secondary propellers driving the current to clear out the murder propellers.

>>725183697
>oh gee it got stuck
>good thing i secured my spear with a rope

>>725185469
>even retarder retard joins in

>>725183728
How do you actually beat this?

>>725185518
You can't, no weapon is longer than one inch and you will scrape your knuckles and go ouchie.

>>725183647 (OP)
>Shambler type zombies
Sure
>Runner type zombies
Probably not

>>725185196
That's just core zombie thing. Zombie-ism suppose to be an infection. It's not a hive mind thing. That says a realistic zombie apocalypse would be boring af because there wouldn't be as many zombies as in movies and games.

>>725185518
being immune to pain and bleeding out

Why are zombie apocalypses even a thing. Shit decomposes down to a skeleton from weeks to months.
All you would need to do is survive a single year. After that 99.99% of the zombies would be gone.

>>725185518
.38 snubnose + just walk away.

>>725185651
it happens because it usually starts as an infection that makes people go rabid, and they won't stay down

The only way to clear a zombie horde in direct combat is being a video game super badass with supernatural strength, speed and endurance who can keep swinging his weapon for days.
If you are a normal human being, it's smartest to use traps, explosives and fire.

>>725185651
A year is a pretty long time.

>>725185518
I just do a 360 and walk away.

>>725183647 (OP)
What you need in a zombie survival situation is full shark bite proof chainmail under full plate armor. If you can't get bit then you only have to worry about other survivors shooting you, which you will never be safe from. In a zombie survival scenario every single material gets broken down into weapons since they will all break eventually.

>>725185651
We Are The Real Monsters

Isn't the lore that zombies rot enough for them to become "soft"? Or I'm thinking of some knock-off movie?
That aside, can anyone help me find an old chink chong movie about their local vampire variety? I randomly caught it on TV back in late 90s-early 00s and the only thing I remember that it heavily utilized chains in fights.

>>725185651
What if it's an I Am Legend scenario where people turn into vampires instead? Surprised vampire apocalypses haven't been as popular.

>>725185113
>A corpse should fall apart in like a week.
The way i think how it should go is the zombies should survive but only if they get to eat something, eventually
Maybe they survive like scavengers and just eat dead shit and just have extremely efficient metabolism

>get on motorcycle
>ride to fucksville, nowhere SC
>live in mountains with tent and solar powered cooker
simple as

>>725185742
>Go into neet basement with hundreds of food cans, a big water tank and a big empty tank.
>Eat the canned food, game, sleep, repeat
>Shit into the big empty tank
>Do this for one year
>Return to living like a normal person
>All the zombies have decomposed
>The remaining stragglers are easy to del with because single isolated zombies are weak and easy to kill.

>>725185518
push him over with a stick and he'll be pinned to the ground

>>725185591
Everytime you poke him with your spear he just reflects that damage back at you
So while youre hitting him, youre taking damage from reflect AND the guy is trying to murder you at the same time

>>725185865
Watch Daybreakers

>>725185518
shield bash go brrrrrrrrr

>>725185923
It's true. The only real counter is to unplug your router every time he breaks down your door.

>>725185873
>gets raped by rednecks in your sleep

why were there so many zombies in cajun country?

>>725184795
Yeah but you can just stand on top of something behind a spiked wall and the zombies arent going to do shit

>>725185958
>Anime girl
Will die to a single crippled zombie that has its legs destroyed and one arm destroyed, no matter her weapon or armor.

>>725186005
better than zombies eating my intestines

>>725185196
killing them by headahoot is canon faggot

>>725186043
>crippled zombie that has its legs destroyed and one arm destroyed
Apply mop to face repeatedly until mush.

>>725183647 (OP)
But what if it get's stuck

>>725184994
>These things can't stop a boar
>the tool we used to hunt boars for millenia wont stop a boar
ok retard

>>725186064
What makes you think rednecks won't do that after raping you?

>>725185238
People rarely went hunting alone, anon. One spear maybe, but multiple would stop a boar in its tracks.

>>725183647 (OP)
The real problem aren't the human zombies but the zombie dogs.
I could mow down hordes of zombies with my machine rifle, but the second a single zombie dog appears, I would just be too overwhelmed by horniness and lust that I would just have to drop my weapon and submit to the zombie dog taking his big beautiful zombie knot into my ass, probably infecting me in the process, killing me.
The zombie dogs are the real issue. See one and lust will overcome me and its game over. At least it would be a nice way to die.

>>725184932
A dagger isn't that scary if you have a sword or gun.

>>725186241
>wow it took a whole group of you to stop me

I will be the guy scrawling insane nonsense on the walls.

>>725186281
Be grateful a pack of humans killed you, pig. If it were wolves, they'd eat you alive anus-first.

>>725185865
Vampire apocalypses don't happen because vampires are all intelligent and vampire thralls can't go out of control.
Best options you get are thigs like the skyrim dlc where you can temporarily blot out the sun.

>>725185865
MORGAN
I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE MORGAN

>>725186028
They're going to keep amassing and pushing. It doesn't really take that many people to push over a brick wall (chainlink isn't going to do shit) - 4 people can upend a car and you're going to have a lot more than 4. Unless you've got the Berlin Wall or a whole castle to hide behind I'd suggest investing in faster killing.
Also zombies don't give a damn about spikes. I think you're better off making everything super slippery, like having a constant stream of oil and water on the floor while you're above them, get those dumbasses on the ground to slow them down and make them easier to kill.

>>725186258
>scary
Isn't the point of daggers to do SURPRISE BUTTSEX type of attacks? They won't be coming at you with it up front.

>>725186043
Anime girl in question has like 4 different mech forms, is immune to any reasonable damage, and desolves other things by standing near them. She is so immune to poison and normal bite forces that she could eat the zombies.

>>725185518
hydrogen bomb

>>725186150
Yeah alright Rob Zombie

>>725186507
You wish, tranny.

>>725183697
>>725183831
How would it get stuck in your estimation..?

>>725185518
With magnets.

>>725186507
Literally spent an entire night grinding defense stats by accident.

>>725186468
Daggers were for after you knocked the other guy's main weapon out of his hamds and wrestled his fully armored ass to the ground then you could stab him in one of the few places that armor couldn't cover.
But also sneak attacks on unarmored people.

>>725186573
The human digestive system has tons of enzymes and chemicals which effectively make it like glue

>>725185518
A blunt weapon

NONE OF YOU WILL SURVIVE

>>725186258
I think I'd still be scared of a dagger if I had a sword. Just because I've got a rifle doesn't make someone with a pistol hurt less. I'm not going to be like "lol lmao nice 2hp damage time for counter" I'd probably just scream and pass out from getting repeatedly stabbed if they just gunned it and got a hit in.
Aren't cops terrified of knives? I know
>cops
but don't they have that 50 yard rule thing where the dude with the knife running at you just wins unless you've already got the loaded pistol in their direction?

>>725185196
>not reanimating the dead for use in daylight robberies
NGMI

>>725186597
impossible
nobody knows how dey work nigga

>>725185196
>a group of SIX zombies???
>MASAKA
>BAKANA
>whatever will our group do against this horde!?!?!?!
>everybody run!!!
>JOHNNY SLIPPED ON NOTHING
>AIEEEEEE HE CAN'T GET UP FOR SOME REASON
This is how basically every zombie encounter in Telltale's TWD went.

>>725185317
Soldiers carried daggers and mailbreakers just for that you retard
beating someone to death takes ages compared to hitting him to the ground then stabbing him in the armpit

>>725186573
>bones don't exist

>>725186653
he seems only slightly annoyed by the fact he's being shot repeatedly by a zombie with an uzi

>>725186769
zombies are very weak so they do less damage
the power of zombies is that theres so many of them they will overwhelm you

>>725186694
>beating someone to death takes ages
Everyone's seen enough liveleaks these days to know that getting hit with a baseball bat disables someone as fast as getting sliced with a knife. You're not going to turn around and go "hmph, nice try, but I'm only bleeding out internally so that doesn't count".

>>725186769
They're both zombies.

>>725186769
Yeah 9mm will do that to you desu. Good thing they weren't blasting each other with a 38. instead.

>>725186707
You're confusing zombies with skeletons

>>725185518
electrical damage

>>725184795
>>725183831
>>725184634
*clears throat*

>>725186970
>spear, hammer and a cool can opener
I kneel.

>>725186856
>the power of zombies is that theres so many of them they will overwhelm you
It's also
>9mm
Basically little bug bites.

>>725185518
Acid/Alkaline bath

>>725186649
>Just because I've got a rifle doesn't make someone with a pistol hurt less

>>725187013
The movie was dark despite this literal meme scene. Still worth the watch just to see what the actual context was about.

>>725187150
That's fucking cheating.

>>725186970
The issue with melee weapons is that people are discounting that zombies don't feel pain. Even if you cleave them halfway in two, they will still try to get you. In most scenarios it's also just a dozen survivors using makeshit weapons vs an entire horde of zombies. If we consider games that add in special infected zombies, then you have zombies that are outflanking and ambushing you which makes weapons like these that require men to go into formation useless because now you have zombies dropping at you from above or jumping at you from behind while you're whacking away at another zombie.
The best weapon is honestly just a high powered laser cutter that can slice off the limbs of a dozen zombies in one go.

>>725186002
this

>>725187215
> people are discounting that zombies don't feel pain
multiple posts have mentioned it

>>725187150
>future warfare will boil down to lobbing massive space rocks at each other flying at incredibly high speeds
Some things never really change

>>725187290
>boil down
The fact our energy grid is largely dependent on using water to push a wheel in a turbine or boil water into steam to (again) push a wheel in a turbine is very funny to me.

>>725186881
he specified heavy armor
a baseball bat would do jack shit against plate armor, if you want to inflict injury you need a heavy mass concentrated on a very small surface
at the very end of the medieval period armor got so damn good that it covered most weakspots and could resist guns, theres countless breastplates with dents from bullets in them
pic related is what youd need to really rattle somebody with plate

>>725187483
For me it's the thorium saltpill. The fact that we haven't taken that concept further makes me despise Blackrock even more than I already do now. We'll have antimatter engines that still require water as a catalyst because steam is just that good for making power with.

>>725186251
what's wrong with you and why did I think of zombie knot too even before getting to the second sentence

>>725186251
>>725187796
Zombie dog pussy and knots...

>>725187637
>not apple coring followed by lead lining your baseball bat for that extra kick
.......

>>725184994
those kinds of spears were made specifically for boars
>>725185238
thats why the spear in the pic has the wings at the tip

>>725183831
You should've gone for the head, it's a fucking zombie.

>>725183647 (OP)
that depends, is this a viral zombie apocalypse or a necromantic zombie apocalypse
additionally, are they fast zombies or shamblers

>>725187637
>a baseball bat would do jack shit against plate armor
It would still really hurt and a headblow might still kill. Would at least make it very easy to kill with a follow up. It presumably isn't a hollow t-ball bat being swung by a 14 year old, it's a heavy club.

I feel like people are still operating under the videogame idea that weapons have to be able to penetrate or dent armour to destroy what's underneath. 400 pounds of concussive force is 400 pounds and armour padding isn't that great. The only thing I've seen be able to just shrug off baseball blows is those inbuilt motorcycle body airbags, at very specific flat angles, and that's modern tech you can barely move in.

>>725188003
>fast zombies
Lame and gay.

>>725188003
>it's the murder raping variant with a fast infection turnover and a penchant for licking doorknobs
Grim

>>725188086
If we get the Cross apocalypse I'm just killing myself to reroll my reincarnation for an apocalypse with better writers.

>>725187875
>>725187796
>>725186251
wtf

>>725188136
I still like Shakey and Psychopath the best.

ok what if a marker crash landed in the middle of every capital city of the world?

>>725188258
Zombie dog dick apocalypse...

>>725183647 (OP)
Deploy the phalanx. We're hunting zombies and nephilim in kandahar, boys.

>>725187894
still spreading out the impact over too much space
sure if you make it heavy enough then itll still work, but so would a big enough concrete brick and it would be shit as a weapon
>>725188023
really hurt, yeah, kill, not likely at all and neither would a follow up swing, assuming you even get it in because youd have one pissed off knight coming at you, unless the follow up is wrestling to the ground and taking a dagger under the plates
honestly an unarmed armored opponent would be able to beat an unarmored baseball bat wielder to death with his steel gauntlets

Your fat ass wouldn’t be able to wield that thing for more than five minutes

>>725188479
*turns into a boomer and vomits on you*

>>725188338
I read that as "market crash" and wondered to myself how that would cause a zombie apocalypse

>>725188442
>sure if you make it heavy enough then itll still work, but so would a big enough concrete brick and it would be shit as a weapon
I thought the brick hammers were some of the best strike based weapons in Bloodbourne and Elden Rang? You can't go wrong with a rock on the end of a stick.

>>725188338
I'd try and get some Unitologist pussy and die in a freaky sex ritual instead of bothering with all this survival crap. I'm not bothering surviving unless we can return to relative normalcy in like 5 years, anything more than that and it's just not worth it.
You will not find my ass in some starving failing survivalist commune sucking dick at farming while some wannabe landlord cult dictator enacts the "pussy for me but not for thee" edict for the fifth time in as many leaders.

>>725188565
do you really think there could be any chance of normalcy

>>725188561
not in pvp, people will just attack you during the windup animation
kind of like in real life when you have a really heavy weapon

>>725188549
>zombie labor gets made redundant by AI and robots
>they turn on the few remaining humans that haven't been forcibly converted, tank'd or starved eating their shrunken brains to survive the harsh economic climate

>>725188549
Hebrews turn into flesh eaters if you separate them from their hidden jew gold for too long.

>>725188649
If I can get a beer and play some vidya that's normal enough for me.

>>725188565
Thinking too small anon. I'm surviving until the moons show up so I can fuck one. I will be the man who fucked a fucking moon.

>>725185907
you'll find, in fact, that is the ground that's going to be pinned

>>725188549
Pretty easy, actually. Just imagine a massive world-wide IRL pink field event that makes people go feral from the shock.

>>725186694
Yeah, but they still had their spear/poleaxe/warhammer/staff as their main weapon to actually defeat the enemy before killing him with the dagger. Fighting with only a dagger or knife against a guy with some polearm is suicide, even if you are stronger and better. No reach, poor defense and poor damage.

if shtf bug out or stay in the city?

>>725185518
Ranged zombies

>>725188565
>Unitologist pussy
Inb4 CHOMP

Why do I have a fear of zombies? I hate horror and find it very boring and unfun the zombies freak me out. I don't know why.

>>725188649
So long as you don't mind being a space pirate who can never land on another planet again it might not be all bad. Hope you know how to hydroponics in spess.

>>725183647 (OP)
*makes the spear obsolete in every way possible*
Psssh

>>725189127
>implying you can maintain 3 rounds per minute without jobbing
Doubt.png

Would this work?

>>725189127
>loses a fucktonne of skirmishes to tribals because it turns out armour penetration doesn't matter when your opponents don't even wear it and now you just have a shitty bow that fires once every 2 minutes
It's like rock paper scissors. Armour dude beats spear, musket beats armour, spear beats musket.

>>725189223
>attached with fucking straps
you're going to cut your legs off dude

>>725189292
Skill issue. Just don't drop them.

>>725188830
knights often dropped their weapons in very close range to switch to a half sworded sword or a dagger for the grappling
reach is still invaluable outside of 1v1 settings however, this is only when its a duel

>>725189223
Inb4 you end up like the old man in the Rise of the Living Dead reboot. Bad enough using one in the back of a moving truck let alone two on a stick.

>>725189410
That was funny. What a stupid ass ending sequence to a movie.

>>725187701
They don't want to recover thorium from coal ash and they also don't want to pay india for monazite sand

>>725189223
not unless you have superhuman strength, in which case you'd be better off with something more durable and has a solid blade at the end

>>725189223
Almost, you just need more chainsaws, I see room for at least 2 or 3 on the stick alone.

>>725189469
True just do what the germs are doing by digging up old black forests for shit tier coal while your cities continue to suffer rolling brownouts in more ways than one.

>>725189580
>DW 6 lubu's star glaive but chainsaws
Fund it.

>>725183728
>gets crushed

>>725185518
hit it harder

>>725183728
We have such sights to show you

>>725189223
Combo weapons killed DR. Fucking canucks.

>>725187013
>9mm is le nothing
At that distance you could totally chew through a limb and rip it off with, like, 12 bullets.

>>725189250
Yes the gunpowder-using west know for NOT conquering natives...

>>725190084
Eh, it was a few things. Giving the franchise to some d-list toronto cocksuckers that had only made baseball games was going to end in disaster regardless.
If it was handed to someone with a passion for small-scale sandbox games like Acquire, they could've made it work. I liked DR1's intricate map placement but it undid itself with stuff like the triple book chainsaw combo or postgame megaman blaster making it worthless to do stuff like bother with uzi spawns or shake boosters.

>>725190289
>12 bullets

>>725190401
They don't tell you about the 10-1 KD ratio in favor of the Spear chuckers in the history books.

How many zombie scenarios actually address the fact that fucking up any part of the human body starts making movement incredibly difficult?
Runners are impossible, they'd burn so many calories so quickly they'd be dead in a day, or less, much less in areas with risk of exposure, too hot or cold, body will just shut down.
So that leaves only slow walkers and crawlers, not exactly a dangerous threat.
And what is the pathogen itself feeding off of? It's not photosynthesizing energy is it?

>>725183728
>trips
>zombies pile on
>cooked alive

A spear would be a bit unwieldy in tight spaces, that's why they replaced sword bayonets with shorter ones and would prefer to use shorter, one handed melees for tight spaces

>>725183647 (OP)
>sucks to use indoors
>sucks to use in wide-open streets if hordes are present
>piercing wrong part of zombie can cost you the weapon

They'll have specific uses at best. Stick to boomsticks and don't waste ammo.

>>725189218
>>725189250
*stabs you with bayonet*
Spear beats what now?

>>725190613
I've red some chinese zombie themed cultivation comic & they addressed it by having zombies generate monster/chi cores.
Comic itself was shit, but that aspect was nice and made sense, especially, when later on when introducing advanced zombie variants.

>>725190848
So magic basically.

>you can't believe it
>the fucking Zombie Apocalypse is actually kicking off!
>you've waited your whole life for this moment
>pinch me, I must be dreaming!
>Look there's real zombies coming right for us! SO COOL!
>You're played all the games, you've seen all the movies, you know exactly what to do!
>I'm about to have the most fun in my life and totally survive better than anyone els-!
>**Trip and fall hitting your head on a rock and die immediately**

>>725190761
>after stab flesh jams gun barrel

>>725190401
The natives lost in the same way that the American South lost that one civil war. Doesn't matter if you fuck up a disgusting amount of the opponent's footmen if they're completely disposable and have the resources to outlast you into a political surrender anyway.

>>725184168
>>725184586
It's kinda cool.

>>725190613
>they'd burn so many calories so quickly they'd be dead in a day
anon, they're zombies.
they don't have metabolic processes to shut down.
trying to apply real biology when talking about zombies is pointless

>>725191430
>modern day german police is like two steps away from being modern teutons
wheres the pope when you need him

>>725191537
So real zombies are just impossible. Closest is methheads I guess, not contagious but they do act the part.

>>725190940
>magic
It was sci-fi coated, more like, but you can say that, I guess.

Zombies aren't usually living dead so much as they are virus-lobotomized retards with their limiters removed anyway. They are still "alive", just irreparably brain damaged.

>they think they can kill zombies by destroying the brain or shooting them
>they don't know that the movie lied!

>>725191008
Now you're just being silly. That didn't happen.

>>725191720
Those aren't "zombies", those are "infected".

>>725185518
blunt objects swung with a lot of force
heavy blunt damage counters plate armor

>>725191696
>so real zombies are just impossible
no shit, it's fiction.
you just have to pick a universe/writer and stick to what word of god says regarding them

>>725191720
>limiters removed anyway.
>tear ligaments
>can't move limbs
Instant handicapped zombies.

>>725191797
Tomato tomato.

>>725190513
Yes the western nations with a few ships of men against entire continents of natives were outnumbered the natives 10:1
Yes quite indeed

>>725191743

But in this movies universe zombies are even easier to kill. They die to electrocution. Even a taser or an electric fence will kill them.

>>725191870
Well, they considered spaniards Gods, didn't they, so that's not exactly fair.

>>725191720
Necromancy is cooler than gay viruses anyway

>>725184716
Literally 7 days to die

>>725191884
tasers and electric weapons arent exactly common irl

>>725184586
I think it makes sense to wear the anti-stab shit if the people you're around are stab-happy. What're they supposed to wear, clown pajamas and propeller hats?

>>725192000

But every single town and city has an abundance of electricity. They literally killed an entire towns worth of zombies by cutting some powerlines after it had rained.

>>725192027
A protective layer of fatty blubber

>>725185196
lol what
killing zombies by destroying their brains is about as old as it gets
is this b8? surely no one is this retarded

>>725192000
Tasers are super common. They are just fucking dogshit.

>>725184716
>not keeping the zombies as your pets so you can throw your enemies into moat once you become feudal lord of the zombie apocalypse

>>725191884
They needed extremely high voltage for a prolonged period of time to kill a horde of them. The necessary power was only found at electrical substations which would likely be destroyed or shut down during an apocalypse

>>725191884
Is that a sequel introduction or did I just forget this, because it really felt like they were just indestructible in the first one and every attempt to fight them just makes it worse and punk nihilism was the whole point.

>>725191994
I'm not scared by skeletons, though. Skeletons are cool. Vomit covered mindless freaks who stand outside my door all night until I'm starving scare me.

>>725192027
it makes sense to shoot those subhumans instead of stripping yourself 1000 years of progress

>>725190961
Sex with Barbra

>>725184493
Not really. You would want a spear with a heavy spike instead of a blade for penetrating the skull though.

>>725192157
I would keep some zombie animal like a boar, a wolf or a bear as a pet in a cage with BDSM gear on so it cannot harm me or anyone else.
It then gets fed bodyparts from other zombies every day so it doesn't starve to death. I think this would be very funny.

>>725185142
Brainlet take. Humans can heal from stuff most mammals need to be put down from.

>>725191979
Well and every other tribe in the area allied with Cortes to bring down the Aztecs

>>725185765
You don't even need that. Leather would be enough to stop a zombie bite

>>725192461
That's because most mammals literally cannot keep the fuck still. Horses get put down from broken legs, not because they physically can't heal, but because they won't stop fucking around with a broken leg and it just won't heal.

>>725185196
That's how the work in the first zombie film ever made. The stupid OP zombie from return of the living dead is a parody based on said first zombie movie with its own spin.

>>725192248
Skeletons would be terrifying if they existed IRL though

>>725192461
what another anon said, animals are just too stupid to stop and avoid reinjuring themselves

>>725183697
>rotting zombie flesh is somehow more strong than living human flesh
if only 10000 years of human civilization had thought of that when they used spears in every single war ever.

>>725192750
you have no foresight do you

>>725192461
we can be fucking awesome. we're the best at killing shit just by throwing things

>>725191430
>le incel deus vult helmet
please kys and get some taste

>>725185518
Net, the spikes will make it impossible to take off.

Dying Light was best zombie game

>>725192461
>Humans can heal from stuff most mammals need to be put down from
with the backing of modern medicine and the intelligence to understand what the doctor means when he says "stay off that leg for a couple week".
not because we have wolverine-tier regeneration powers

>>725192806
>random bullshit go

>>725192807
that's not what it's called anon it's called a sugar loaf helmet
although there are varieties to the dome some were flat and other were pointed

>>725192506
Zombies really need the dc comics doomsday treatment where they adapt to whatever kills them. Otherwise they should be easy to handle outside of infection spreading.

>>725188561
Demon souls Lucerne hammer is pretty potent

>>725193015
I feel like zombies being a plausibly defeatable threat is why they've had so much cultural staying power. Everyone enjoys fantasizing how they'd solve or outlast the problem.
Once they just become insurmountable for the average joe you just shrug your shoulders with a "well guess I'll die" and it makes them instantly less engaging.

>>725193015
so like resident evil/l4d?

>>725192986
>sugar loaf
>child of nature.... friend of man

>>725183647 (OP)
>>725184493
Pitchfork>=very long sledge/warhammer>regular blunt weapon>spear. Stopping power and spacing are more important than lethality, especially in 1vX.

>>725183697
that crossguard is specifically made to prevent that

>>725183647 (OP)
The best way of wiping out a zombie apocolypse is starting our own apocolypse. We should round up all pajeets, niggers and turd worlders, arm them with knives, sticks and other vaguely weapon shaped junk and then throw them all at the zombie hordes, crushing the zombies great numbers underneath the turd worlders even greater numbers. And once that giant massacre is over, no zombie hordes will be left that we can send a second squad of armed and armored chads to clear out all the remaining straggler zombies.

>>725185865
the problem with vampire outbreaks is that vampires have a bunch of convoluted rules you need to pick and choose from mainly the issue of sunlight and how vampirism is spread
like everyone just makes sunlight be because of UV radiation so it just becomes everyone having uv lights everywhere to kind of kill the tension a bit
spreading is another weird thing, if you're infected when you're just bitten it will spread fast sure but it sounds retarded in terms of keeping a feedable population available for them to actually be able to live off of
the other common way is that the recipient has to drink some of the vampire's blood to be turned but that makes it harder to really make it an apocalyptic numbers issue because it takes more effort to spread vampirism and it implies that vampires need to be more sentient and reasoning to be able to select people to turn and it kind of puts them out of the realm of being a zombie analogue again
you either change vampires so much to make them work as a swarm threat that it might as well just be modern smart/fast zombies or you just gloss over all the details for why its vampires taking the world by storm at which point trying to make it vampires instead of zombies just kind of feels contrived
zombies can easily be a lot more dangerous and fun but everything has to try and explain them as le bioweapon or le science gone wrong trash that just bloats things unnecessarily compared to just having it be fucking magic which lets it be stupid and gives the zombie setting more to work with

>>725193454
>Turd worlders are retarded and get hit
>Now have an even bigger horde of zombies. Now you have to worry about them smelling like shit and trying to scam you out of google play cards.

>>725185286
Unless it can spread on the wind or whatever no zombie apocalypse would reach critical mass. As soon as the situation is clear we are going into COVID lockdown 2 and the entirety of the . military and every law enforcement agency is being mobilized to go and shoot zombies and people who are violating quarantine orders. If it even gets to the point of a city somehow becomes highly infested they will just set up a cordon and fucking boom the hordes of shambling zombies with artillery, airstrikes, drones, etc. I mean for fucks sake getting up in a tree stand via ladder makes you effectively immune to normal zombies. This shit would be cleaned up in a few months and whenever a straggler showed up in the future after having been locked in some abandoned home or lost in the woods or whatever there would just be a policy to shoot them on site. Ultimately they are as threatening and organized as rabid dogs

>>725185317
you are a fucking retard, daggers were exclusively made to grapple kniggas and stabbing them in the armor's gaps.

>>725192986
I think the armet close helm is superior aestheticly

>wear full medieval plate armor
>zombie vomits blood on you and you're infected
now you're a zombie in full medieval plate armor

>>725188023
baseball bats make dogshit weapons against a plate helmet with padded thick linen underneath. The wooden medieval mauls were actually filled with lead at the top end so they could weight more.

>>725193885
1, that's not how zombies work. 2, you're not getting plate armor in an apocalypse unless it's already sitting in your house

>>725186082
>Headahoot

>>725193720
>daggers were exclusively made to grapple kniggas and stabbing them in the armor's gaps.
After defeating them with a real weapon, like a polearm, first.
Dumb buffoon. Go learn about medieval combat more. No knight used his little dagger as his main weapon in dueling or warfare.

One thing not seen in zombie media is how the military resorts to full auto instead of forming a line and firing in semi-auto volleys like armies of old.

>>725184586
If they were stuck in the middle ages they would be fighting the muslims.

>>725183647 (OP)
Wouldn't spinning a Zweihander be more effective for mass control?

>Live near the ocean
>Infinite shark teeth for swords

>>725194241
>0:18
kek at how the dog sits on the chair

>>725186571
>troon that hates fictional women acting up again

>>725194598
these will be great for when you become cannibal warlord of the wasteland and need to arm your troops

The best weapon in a zombie apocalypse is a fucking canoe. Zombies can't swim, so you can just abuse the ample waterways in America to never interact with them until they're all decomposed and harmless.

>>725194701
>How can we make this about my fav tr/a/nime? :3
Go back >>>/a/

>>725194540
well the police guy with the chainmail is constantly fighting muslims desu LOL

>>725194801
How do you handle guys on motorboats that want to kill you and take your supplies?

>>725194598
Aren't those designed to cause as little actual damage as possible so you can bag the most slaves and sacrifices? Like the medieval equivalent of a taser.

>mindless zombies that are just reanimated human corpses
Shit the UK government of the 2000s can not just contain, but commodify, within the week.
>sentient zombies that are basically just humans but immortal and bloodhungry
We are SO FUCKED.

>>725193510
Just have a permanent eclipse that blots out the sun, also have a vampire politician tell right wingers that uv causes autism and garlic lowers testosterone. Proceed with vampire attack.

>>725192131
Back in my days zombies were immortal products of dark magic.

>>725195193
>sentient zombies that are basically just humans
then they aren't really zombies anymore, are they?

>>725195328
>permanent eclipse
so magic
>le right
go back

>>725185946
Fighters of the Nightbreakers.

>>725185518
>>725192850
Even better throw a blanket over him.

>>725185651
Something something the zombie virus makes the flesh so toxic most other microorganisms can't survive in it

>>725192195
It's from the sequels. In the original, even burning the bodies only made things worse.

>>725192850
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCI9Y4VGCVw

>>725193682
To be fair white men are too smart to end up as zombies. I expect the majority of infected will be niggers, pajeets and women.
Best solution is jail the women in reproduction camps and send the niggers and pajeets as an united z-force army so some of them can kill some zombies instead of them all getting turned with 0 kills to their name.

>>725183728
The leather club is two blocks down

>>725186258
>A dagger isn't that scary if you have a sword or g-ACK

>>725194801
Zombie sharks

>>725195374
Yeah, and it certainly didn't start from one single zombie just biting another person. All the dead across the globe just started rising at once. Sure, you might be able to kill a few if headshots worked, but there's still tens of millions more everywhere you could think to flee to.

>>725192897
"you like super monkey ball?"

Wot if
>zombie apocalypse
>magical origins
>magic becomes real
>post apocalypse is typical makeshift survival fare but gradually you gain more magical power until you're a sorcerer beyond such petty means

>>725195463
They are, zombies are reanimated corpses, that's it, that's all they are.
The Flood from Halo count just as much as the zombies from Plants vs. Zombies do.

>>725196997
mite b kewl

>>725196683
In a lake? In a river? The Mississippi is the largest navigable river system on Earth, you can just fuck off if there's a zombie shark in your neck of the woods.

>>725196997
thousands die for the chance of me getting unlimited cosmic power?
sure

>>725184795
>it'd be like trying to stab through a (thin) layer of brick.
You can quite casually stab through someone's skull with a kitchen knife. A spear will do the trick. Now, whether that is enough to kill a zombie, I cannot say.

>>725197386
In a tornado, are you daft? Why do you think sharks, the world's most apex predator, needs something as silly as water?

>>725183728
If theres a large pack of like 5-10 zombies they would just hold you down and keep piling on until you die of dehydration.

I can tell almost no one here has done any type of physical activity or even cooking. You don't just cut through flesh and bone cleanly.

>>725197427
Straight up don't believe that. Pain in the ass to get through thin turkey/chicken bones with anything short of a cleaver.

>>725197478
Tornadoes can't get you if you just run to the other side of a mountain.

>>725197847
That's what you think you mother fucker.

You're going to have a near limitless supply of table knives and forks, just tie them on a stick and use that.

>>725195132
these are hawaiian weapons and just like obsidian-spiked clubs they actually fucking hurt and if they get stuck inside you it's guaranteed infection.

>>725195193
>sentient zombies that are basically just humans but immortal and bloodhungry
Pretty sure those are ghouls.

*trivializes zombie apocalypse*

>>725199109
What? Koreans?
They arent even on the roof

>>725199224
The roof is like a limiter. They are even stronger without it.

>>725199109
Yeah, you don't need much padding to prevent human bites. Just thick clothes would work.

>>725184634
I really feel bad for whoever was on the receiving end of this thing during medieval battles. I bet it left some brutal injuries.

>>725197258
What is this?
>>725197413
The path to apotheosis lies atop a mountain of corpses. Classic trope.

I've been using a lvl 6 Steel Spear with the burning shaft mod in 7 Days to Die - its not very good, even with all the spear perks. Getting attacked from all sides at once makes the spear useless, this isn't ancient Roman warfare where you have a wall of idiots coming at you one line at a time

>>725198849
Pretty sure zombies, as a concept, are an offshoot of the ghouls from Night of the Living Dead.
>"Actually I never called ours zombies. That description appeared in an article in Cahiers du Cinéma. 'They're zombies,' it said. We originally thought of them as ghouls."

>>725184385
NO U
also good luck waving it around while slowly getting surrounded you fucking imbecile

>>725196997
Very lame.

>>725196997
Sounds like a pretty interesting concept if the game actually goes long enough for the postapocalypse to turn into a magical setting.

>>725199964
>this isn't ancient Roman warfare where you have a wall of idiots coming at you one line at a time
you are playing 7 days to die wrong because this is literally what happens but even more condensed down to 1 zombie at a time with a well-made base

>>725184458
why even have the zombie hypothetical if you can just bypass infection by zombie anyway
might as well be arguing about how to fight tuberculosis

>>725196160
White people today? looool, they'd probably walk at the zombies and let them bite them because they think the zombies deserve a fair chance or have feelings too, or help them become coordinated groups to just help kill other white people.

>>725200527
Californians don't count as white.

>>725200463
I'm playing with a friend and we've just been having fun, not really trying to set up a killing field/bottle neck choke point for horde nights, but i was talking more about when youre out looting and suddenly theres 5 or 6 of them on you. Nothing an M60 can't handle in about 3 seconds, though.
Maybe it is time to build a more efficient defensive system though, we just made our second house yesterday and the defenses are entirely unplaced for the moment.

>>725192636
>if

>>725195193
>UK government of the 2000s
I like the specification because it's fucking grim today

OFFICIAL TIERLIST OF WEAPONS THAT WOULDN'T SUCK DICK IN THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE:

Weapons will be ranked on 2 things.
1. How viable they are to kill a group of zombies, as a single zombie poses negligible threat to anyone who isn't already going to die at that point.
2. The amount of effort, training or other factors needed to use the weapon effectively. This list assumes all weapons can be cleaned and maintained properly.

S Rank:
>Mace
>Broadsword
>Bilhook
>Axe
>Hammer
All items can be used effectively with little to no training or familiarity and can be used effectively in cramped conditions.
A rank:
>Guns* (caveat of them being useless without ammo and attracting more zombies)
>Halberd
>Spear
>Zweihander
>Bow and arrow
>Crossbow
All items are effective but require additional items to work, or training to operate. Some items are not suitable for confined spaces
B rank:
>Dagger
>Sling
>Explosives
>Pike
>Artillery
Situational use at best
C rank:
>Flamethrowers
>Anything that requires a certain method for proper use, such as Katanas or fencing rapiers
Impractical, especially if you don't know how to use it. Your Katan might be sharp but blood loss ain't doing shit to a zombie.
If you disagree you're a faggot.

>>725185518
Conceptualise the Dao of sharpness so that you can selectively make yourself immune, then focus your killing intent and strike a thousand times with the techniques formed from the enlightenment of a master who contemplated a pin for a hundred years.
This might sound like it takes a while, but it would take place in under a second

>>725201748
>Chainsaw, baseball bat, pipe and fire axe not listed.

>zombies can be easily defeated with improvised weapons
Realistically solved within a week. What a shit setting.

>>725202246
>Chainsaw
meme tier
>Baseball bat
Meme tier unless metal, in which case A
>Pipe
Meme tier
>Fire axe
I literally said axe you spastic.

>>725202286
I live in a city with more than 10 million residents. How the fuck you gonna "solve" that in a week?

>>725202360
>I literally said axe you spastic.
Battle axes and fire axes are different.

>>725184529
>Dig pit
>Place a sound lure at the bottom
>Wait until it's full of zombies
>Use White Phosphorus

People always talk about killing zombies.

What about using zombies as power sources?

>>725202436
>army reacts and kill all your 'groid neighborhood
Whoa that sure was hard. Most zombie settings depend on the whole mankind reacting in the most retarded ways.

>>725202515
Neither are different enough in practical terms to differentiate for this scenario.
A fire axe can be still be used pretty effectively in, say for example a hallway as well as a one handed axe could.
I'm not taking into consideration meme tier fantasy viking 2h axes that you would need 8 feet of space to swing.

>>725202360
>Chainsaw is le bad
I WILL KILL YOU FOR THIS, ANON!!! You are the meme! You are a meme tier zombie fighter!!! DA CHAINSAW IS DA BEEEST!!!
When the zombie apocolypse comes, I'm gonna CLEAR OUT MY ENTIRE CITY with my Stihl Chainsaw and then I'm gonna chop YOUR head off aswell you zoombie!!!
THE CHAINSAAW RULES BABY!!!!
The broadssword is meme tier and the chainsaw is SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS+++++++++++++++++++++++ divine ultra tier!!!

>>725201748
>no shovel
Retard.

>>725202659
the real deciding factor in zombie settings should be how the virus is transmitted, and how fast it takes over. Yea, if its only through bites then you can just nuke the place. But if its an airborne pathogen? The world is pretty fucked

>>725199497
Don't worry, i'm sure the survivors dies from a horrible and painful death from infection. We're talking about the times where piss was used to clean wounds

>>725202436
Because retard the horde doesn't just spawn into existence at full strength,it needs to snowball on the way up from whatever small # of people initially get turned. As soon as even 10+ undead are walking around in broad daylight trying to eat people and being recorded on a million cameras it's over. The police and military just show up and shoot them and whatever stragglers are around just get gradually filled as people run into them over the next year and just immediately call the zombie hotline to have a whatever zombie task force to show up to deal with them. Again ignoring the disease aspect zombie are basically just pallet swapped meth heads, surprisingly strong and durable but not invisible and not very organized. It it does get to the scale of a town or city being heavily infested the next stage is just cordoning it off and killing everything inside with air strikes, artillery, and armored vehicle patrols all of which zombies have 0 recourse to.

>>725183697
my coldsteel spear never gets stuck in your mom

>>725202805
>But if its an airborne pathogen? The world is pretty fucked
But then the problem its the virus not the zombies.

The holy triangle of weapons is as follows:
Hammer beats Chainsaw. Chainsaw beats Polearm. Polearm beats Hammer.

>>725196205
Fuck you

>>725183697
>spears get stuck
based retard

>300+ replies
>no one mentioned an armored battalion or something
why are you overthinking this?

>>725202901
Not big enough to get stuck

>>725202865
Mentioned right here
>>725203328
being in an armored box with guns effectively makes you invulnerable, it doesn't even need to be an outright tank. An MRAP or any kind of armored car would be enough

>>725185518
Exhaust the fucker to death.

>>725185420
Dig moat
Fill with miniature black holes
Blast We Like To Party at full volume
Attract every zombie in the state
Clean up in an afternoon
360 walk away with a job well done

>>725195651
Dead flesh can't deal with the sun or the cold very well.

>>725204048
where the hell are you getting miniature black holes and just one is enough to destroy the entire planet

>ero VN about gigachad with immunity living as he pleases in a zombie apocalypse
>has no interest in saving humanity just does his own thing like fucking his hot neighbor who turned

It was good enough for Flemish peasants to fuck up knights with. It’s good enough for me.

>>725204498
>LE SPEAR-CLUB
Goyslop weapon.

>>725204654
>t.frog who’s had an ancestor that got goeden’d
Eat shit, Pierre. It’s a smacking stick with a poker, easy as piss to use which is exactly what you want in a SHTF scenario.

>>725204498
ENTER

The zombie apocalypse is a anarcho primitivist argument. They're effectively really shitty predators (god forbid, they might even walk at a fast pace) and you have infinite resources by just walking to a nearby store/house. The only people who fail it would fail to fight off a medium sized dog with prep time and weapons, It exclusively filters domesticated redditors that are only allowed to live because of modern luxuries

>>725204231
>he doesn't know

>>725205085
And every single zombie survival story invariably ends up pitting survivors against other survivors. Good fucking luck getting to the store if a gang of heavily armed faggots are killing everyone else who even comes close to it.

>>725205085
nowadays I think its more akin to walking through one of europe's immigrant refugee ghettos
I'd say a black inner city neighborhood but its more likely that they'd have guns even if they're shitty little hi points

>>725204930
>Let's combine two of the worst weapons in human history into one.

>>725202827
I've been reading a book about ancient medical practice lately and it made me glad to not be born during those days.

>>725205642
>weapons that are still used in some capacity today while halberds and swords aren’t
>worst

I would simply get on a boat to dodge the zombie apocalypse and the only retort people have is "um humans are the real monsters, either your crew or another ship will spawn out of the aether to kill specifically you because I am very smart and Reddit"

>>725199964
That's because 7d2d devs powerscaled both zombies and weapons since a15.2:
-Zombies are faster at digging than an excavator when they dig together
-They dig way faster when digging down, they're retards and will dig down at random.
-Added tougher zombies (rad feral vomit zombies) and other special units (vomit vultures) who don't go down in one hit

-Machete is crazy fast, chops off zombie limbs well and inflicts bleed.
-Sledge is crazy strong, stuns with aoe and hits multiple targets for 100% damage.
-Guns are tiered, so the game is balanced with having automatic guns on you at all times in mind, making unskilled melee almost useless outside of stragglers.

Meanwhile the spear is basically playing with a15 weapons, it's slow, it hits one target (and you have to be precise like in a15 melee) and it can be thrown but it's like a worse bow (less range and no ammo, so it's useless unless you have 20 on you)

Gee, i wonder why the spear sucks when every other option is on a totally different power level than it.
7d2d hasn't been a zombie game since a16 dropped.

>>725202651
We should put then on hamster wheels, make dental hygiene mandatory for all americans and turn the economy into a pony based one instead

>>725206020
You could just live on a small boat by yourself. Just have something to filter water and a fishing rod and you'll do just fine. As long as you don't get fucked over by a storm or something. Or go insane from being on the open ocean for too long. because that can happen.

>>725205340
>And every single zombie survival story invariably ends up pitting survivors against other survivors
It does but literally no one likes this part. It's like a cancer that keeps appearing. IRL people would give you food if you ask and anyone that hoards an an entire store gets kneecapped by literally everyone else (who'd still try avoid outright killing), at least until resource scarcity kicks in
The SOCIETY part of zombie stories is literally just mass hysteria not unlike the world ending AI. "What if they decide to rape and eat people for fun?" They won't.

>>725206537
>Even in the zombie apocolypse society won't leave me alone.
I just want the entire town to myself only. Why can't other survivours just leave me alone in peace?

How would you deal with fast zombies? Slow zombies are such a non threat that i don't even see how a zombie apocalypse could happen but fast zombies are a whole other level.

Just get a gun holy shit
>But they'll hear it
Ok and? They'll hear you screaming and hacking corpses up too, either hide or don't concern yourself with noise, it's not like a corpse would have the brains or comprehension to zero in on exactly where it hears a loud sound if it's not within eyesight. It's not a video game, there's constant noise, they'd always be amped up shuffling around, looking for something.

>>725206936
Hide, walk around in dark clothes at night, stay indoors, get a shotgun, live in a treehouse.

>>725206297
nigga why would you go to the open ocean? just park the boat like 20 meters from the shore.

>>725183647 (OP)
>Single weapon trying crowd control things that feel no pain.

>>725184168
>>725191430
Refugees welcome!

>>725207076
To escape the bother of both people and zombies.

>>725206854
Not even the town, i just want to hoard the resources i need to kill every zombie myself! The others can do whatever as long as it doesn't impact my ability to kill all sons o' bitches.

>>725206936
Step 1: don't be a lard ass and have a little bit of physical fitness. Step 2: Do a pullup to get onto the second story then destroy any stairs or block any access. Ta-da, now you're safe and can kill droves of them with impunity. All thanks to not being 250lb and barely able to walk without breathing hard.

>>725183831
Why are you stabbing a zombie in the heart, retard?

>>725207227
Or be a fat neet and just use a ladder. Zombies can not climb ladders.

>>725207227
>make noise
>horde forms under your walls
>zombies pyramid onto each other and start getting up from all sides
>you have no escape route

>>725206936
wet floors
caltrops
barbed wire
elevated position like >>725207227 said
a combination of all these would be pretty effective

>>725183647 (OP)
Too slow. Good luck fending off multiple zombies.

Also, despite having a long reach, you're still too close to combat the undead safely. If even a drop of blood touches you, you're compromised.

>>725207342
>zombies pyramid onto each other
that was the stupidest thing in recent fiction. Stupid ass WWZ movie made by idiots

Thread is full of complete fucking retards using meme weapons against a foe that just needs the brain destroyed.

>>725207398
They would eventually clamor over each other I assume, but the real answer is people would be in large groups with guns in America and they'd just fucking shoot everything that looked like a zombie (and lots of other people who didn't) until it was over.

>>725207398
How is it stupid, exactly? If zombies operate simply on see human -> goto human then they're going to pile up naturally if you're behind any kind of wall/elevated position.

>>725207227
>get to second story and somehow destroy stairs without getting mauled during the process
>zombies just sit there and wait because they can afford to do that
>your supplies dwindle and you fucking die
Congrats, you got faced with the two Komodo dragons problem and failed

>>725206854
>Athletic survivor girl keeps asking you for food and is getting increasingly desperate
Sex or death, hikki-kun?

>>725183647 (OP)
The strength of zombies lies in numbers. So with a spear all you do is stab one and five other maul you.

>>725184458
I put on my cloth mask and get full immunity

>>725207423
What the fuck did you even post? This looks like a very mutiliated fantasy sword. Where would you even grab this thing?
Just stick to real life weapons that were actually used like chainsaws, greataxes and sledgehammers.

>>725183697
OP BTFO

>>725207514
I embrace my inner Crane and start doing some hardcore parkour to the nearby buildings

>>725207280
What these threads always ignore is that the idea of zombies requires ignorance of what a zombie is or how to combat them. The whole concept needs the general population to be confused, panicking, attempting to try various incorrect solutions, then panicking further when nothing seems to be working. The impossible is happening and nothing can be done about it. How is it even an interesting story when the whole population just says "oh yeah, I know what those are and exactly what to do about them". It would be just equivalent to a few angry monkeys escaping the zoo, scaring people for a bit, then being shortly put down and all back to normal.

>>725207573
mfw leftists (trans kids pedos) believed this and shut down the entire country and arguably destroyed society for generations to come and it’s been completely memoryholed

>>725207756
That's why you have to start the outbreak on something the majority of people do beforehand, like TLOU wheat (i think shawn of the dead did this first tho)
I think most lore does this now

>>725207514
Two Komodo dragons problem?

>>725185317
Spoken like a mother fucker who has only ever thought about this shit in his head instead of looking at actual historical records.

>>725207756
Air infection + slow incubation would fuck people up. Like coronavirus but actually dangerous

>>725207974
yeah, it's a common story about a guy who brings up the "two komodo dragons problem" out of nowhere (hence the story's name), and he is then thoroughly raped by two literal komodo dragons. crazy shit. anyway, don't expect a reply from that guy, he's too busy being raped by two komodo dragons.

>>725208075
>Look at actual historical records
>Spear/polearm guys
>Archers (with axes, hammers and polearms for melee)
>Horse guys with polearms, hammers, bows and muskets
>Even peasants used pitchforks and war scythes instead of their butchery knives.

>>725185518
>all those nails poking out
it's literally called a warhammer dingus google it

This is it

.22 rimfire

>>725209094
>Le big fucking hammer but add a spear and a pick.
Congratulations, anon! You are now officially the most retarded anon in this thread and that is saying a lot.
What a meme of a weapon. Just mashing random weapons that were already trash in their own right together into a meme stick that could never work in real life.

>>725209094
The chainsaw beats this. Hammers are heavy and slow and adding a pick and a spear on top of it doesn't exactly makes it lighter and faster.
Not to mention that it can't be used indoors because it is so stupidly long.
Imagine going through the effort of forging this in the apocolypse instead of just looting a chainsaw like a serious and practical survivour would.

>>725183697
yeah, then you pull out another one from a stack of them. They're cheap and easy to make, just a sharpened bit of metal on the end of a wooden pole, very easy to smith and create thousands of them to be thrown or used in defense.

>>725209320
This is what they switched to in World War Z. Get a firing line with a bunch of shooters. Have a ton of rounds of specially-made incendiary .22 ready to go. Lured a zombie horde towards them, then spend the day blasting tens of thousands of them in the forehead

>>725207489
Their bodies would be crushed under each other's weight

>>725209710
There are probably more 5.56 rounds stockpiled by the US government than there are human beings alive on earth and more ARs already existing than there are people in the US. You wouldn't need to make a new gun, they'd just switch to a strict single fire doctrine.
Also, that guy's Yonkers battle while entertaining, was stupid. The munitions they were dropping would've left no zombie or person ambulatory.
Most of it IRL would be helicopters just launching armaments until there was nothing left.

>>725183647 (OP)
Ways to kill a zombie
>burn them
>remove the head or destroy the brain
Spears don't really do either of these

>>725211095
That's not how to kill a zombie. That spreads it around and creates more zombies even.

>>725209771
>crushed under each other's weight
So their bodies are perfectly pulverized into a flat surface? We're talking like 10-20 piles of bodies stacking against each other. The ones getting crushed at the bottom still provide for the ones climbing up to the top.

>>725211474
>fire doesn't reduce the ash, it turns them into a magic gas that is airborne long enough to infect you immediately
Only one movie used this rule and it was halfway a parody.

>>725184795
>>725184493
What if Zombies don't get stopped by getting their head smashed? What if they are just Magical Undead zombies that doesn't need brains to function?

>>725193885
If zombies infected everyone by simply their blood touching someones skin nobody is surviving anything.

The might as well fight fucking nanties that simply float up to you and start eating you to make more nanites. Don't even need zombies at that point.

>>725211717
Well then FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR MARKER

>>725209603
>to be thrown
This nigga watches too many movies

For me, it's the Backscratcher

>>725193414
It's preventing the thing to just run itself through all the way and get you anyway.
The blade can get stuck.
The shaft can be grabbed.
Spears are only good against what actually lives. It's complete dogshit against zombies.

>>725212574
Will kill a single zombie, then break into pieces.

>>725183647 (OP)
Wish we had more female/child pov media zombies just aren't scary if you can beat them to death with a piece of wood

>>725212108
But cutting off limbs don't kill undead zombies, all they body parts still tries to kill you. In the extreme example a zombie could function at the microscopic level, like that Itchy and Scratchy skit where Scratchy chopped up Itchy that just divided into smaller Itchy to the point where Scratchy inhales the millions of Itchy which proceed to cut up Scratch from the inside

>put on plate armor
>now invulnerable to zombies

>>725213501
>But cutting off limbs don't kill undead zombies, all they body parts still tries to kill you.
ESL
Good morning saar.
Do not redeem.

>>725213582
I just wrote the post in a hurry.

>>725213546
Pretty cool, you would definitely want a squire around to clear shit off you
I've always thought these would be a great support zombie tool

>>725213850
In a hurry to your INDIAN STREET FOOD VENDOR, you fucking PAJEET!!!

>>725213501
>cut off their legs and arms quickly
>leave before those limbs can coordinate attacks
Sounds like a job for Caim.

>>725213969
>>725213582

>>725183697
>he doesn't grease his spear

>>725214106
>No u
Double no u, you stupid pajeet!

>>725183875
YOU SUCKED THAT GUY'S DICK?

>>725209138
Incredibly abysmal taste, please stop breathing oxygen right fucking now

>>725214594
>/v/ anon when somebody has a different subjective opinion from him.

>>725214213
I've got a lizard for that

>>725183647 (OP)
godlike against slow zombies
death sentence against runners

is there even a doubt?

>>725209326
>>725209456
Just in case you are not baiting, this is a real historical weapon that was used in war by humans to kill other humans

>>725192750
>anon thinks all those hoplites carried the sword around for the aesthetic

Spears were famously known to break after the first engagement, anon. Then you’re left with a stick or whatever else you thought to bring.

>>725186675
If only he had someone to tie his shoes.....

>>725214213
heh

>>725209456
I was thinking more this length, but still yes it would be hard to wield in tight spaces. It is not heavy you can find videos online of people swinging them around with ease. Real world is not like video games

>>725214213
my spear is uncut

>>725188416
You literally can't beat long pointy sticks.

>>725216414
>gets his wooden stick split apart by a katana
now what, scrub?

>>725191994
It is way cooler. Having a skeleton rip itself out of its flesh prison is rad.

>>725183647 (OP)
>*trivializes zombie apocalypse*

>>725209326
>Just mashing random weapons that were already trash in their own right together into a meme stick that could never work in real life.
That's literally what they did

>>725185196
this nigga wants gary stu zombies

>>725216590
>katana
I could snap this with my bare hands.

>>725216912
If not, then they're just "infected" and hardly a problem. Wait a few days and they're handled. If some of them manage to get into the wild, they just die to exposure and starvation. Wow, such scary monster.

>>725216978
you can't snap ten thousand layers of steel
period

>>725216590
Tell the guy who did that that he has to take responsibility now.

>>725217085
>When you fold steel so much it degrades back into iron.

>>725183647 (OP)
I would rather take my chances with a club or something blunt in general.

>>725216826
What's the fauchard's anal plug for? It already has a crossguard

>>725217281
Looks like a catch for an opponent's weapon to me.

>>725217056
without a weakness you're just fucked. where's the suspense? how's your movie/game fun?

>>725217445
Yep, most of those are catches for weapons or hooks to grab an opponent and pull them off balance/off horse

the right answer is obviously an iron pole arm mace to bash in the heads. the issue here is your stamina and training. i'd rather make my own bullets at this point.

>>725188416
You could also just fence your way in and sound a siren and just poke at the horde untill everything is dead. Have like a hatch below it with a tunnel that leads to your hideout. It would take a bit of work but this could eventually take out most of the wandering zombies outside.

>>725217445
Already has a crossguard

>>725217560
That's... the point of zombies? It's an apocalypse. How is an apocalypse interesting if it's over in a week and back to normal? Your only course of action is to flee, find whatever minimal safety you can on the way, and struggle to survive longer than others. Maybe far in the future, someone discovers a way to stop them.

>>725207756
>>725184716
Kingdom is one of the great shows because at least is set in a time period where it would make sense for zombies to be dangerous and even they fight them smart....S3 never ever.

>>725217690
The crossguard just prevents the stabby part from penetrating too deep. A weapon could still skirt it and get past. The catch would hold the weapon long enough for you to swing/turn your pole to knock it out of the way.

>>725217690
A crossguard serves a different purpose though, it's there to keep an incoming blade from sliding down the rest of the haft and hitting your hands, whereas the catch is there to allow you to trap an opponent's weapon and potentially disarm him by using the leverage of your pole to wrench it out of his hand.

>>725188762
You are a funny guy. I appreciate you.

>>725217814
Based. I enjoyed Kingdom. Finally a refreshing take on zombies and not enough interest for a third season.

>>725185317
Alright class.
The iconic knight with a sword, isn't using this sword to fight another knight. His armor is too tough. You are using a weird, shitty club shaped like a sword. Clubbing someone with an arming sword does not beat armor.
Swords are for formal duels, due more to their nature as a status symbol, and murdering farmers trying to unlawfully enter the premises.
Axes are farming equipment, not weapons. You can use farming equipment as a makeshift weapon, and an axe is pretty high up the list of farming equipment turned into a weapon. But it is not a weapon. No knight is using an axe as anything besides a publicity stunt, or an emergency weapon because he has nothing else.
Bludgeons actually do have a place in knightly combat. Crushing armor works really well, as even non-lethal hits deform armor to impede movement. Honestly, smashing someone's armor enough to cripple them, then leaving them is pretty solid.
Halberds and other polearms are also weapons that actually see use, but they are not THAT amazing in the big picture. They're nice and versatile, and will actually crush or pierce armor, and chop armored limbs, while also murdering farmers pretty well. But, that internal dead zone fucking sucks, especially when the other guy has armor and you can't just kick or butt him in the gut. Which brings us to...
Daggers are the real knightslayer, but context is important. A dude in a bathrobe is not killing a knight with a dagger. A KNIGHT is killing a knight with a dagger, because they are going to get into a super homo grappling match, then stab eachother in the face, groin, or armpit. If you don't have armor, then the other guy stabs you in the gut, then kicks you.

And of course all of this is irrelevant, because what actually happens is a dude is trained to use a crossbow for two weeks, and shoots a knight in the shoulder or leg because he can't aim for shit, two weeks remember, putting him down.

>>725218024
Oh
And two handed swords are a meme in this context. These are used as part of a larger unit, to smash down shield walls. Not for personal combat. If your choice is a two hander or an arming sword to fight another knight with, the guy with an arming sword is closer to having a knife to stab you in the face, groin, or armpit after a super sweaty and homo wrestling session.

>>725218024
>>725218179
Meanwhile the chainsaw beats all of them.

>>725217764
how is it interesting if it's just you eating canned beans in a shelter?

>>725218386
...Have you actually never seen a zombie film?

Realistically would a lightsaber be good during a zombie apocalypse? I can’t see any downside other than friendly fire/self injury.

>>725218448
What? Dying Light's combat is already trivial after the few quarter. You get plenty of weapons that make zombies a joke. Volatiles would just be able to rip the spear out of your hands anyway

>>725218353
No
A chainsaw actually and unironically struggles to kill a single unarmored human. It'll maim them pretty bad, and the guy with a chainsaw almost assuredly wins against the guy without, because they're in a position to follow up, but
The chainsaw is AWFUL at cutting wet things, and will near instantly clog with viscera. By design, actually.
And chains not specially treated are liable to break the moment they're pressed to metal, meaning you're mostly back to clubbing a knight with a sword, except your sword is horrendously balanced and heavy. You'd probably be better off using the box end as a bludgeon.
Evil Dead was a cool movie, I agree, but the chainsaw is a tool designed to cut wood, and is pretty bad at almost anything else. Hypothetically it could cut bone though.
Your warhammer chainswords rely on magical engineering principles that do not exist in real life to work.

>>725183647 (OP)
This is literally the worst possible weapon for an unarmed headshot only foe. What the fuck are you on about.

>>725218601
yes? the zombies are stoppable in every single film. leave the despair and drama for other creatures, like in A Quiet Place. let zombies be fun shooting galleries.

>>725183728
Good way to get zombie guts stuck on you and soaked in blood.
Wear some sleek plate armor and cover yourself in oil/grease. You're welcome

>>725218620
Assuming the most charitable portrayals of lightsabers.
Pretty good!
No wear and tear, severs limbs and pierces skulls near effortlessly. The main concerns, besides self injury, would be the complete inability of the weapon to stop a zombie if it struck, and severing a zombie horizontally means the top can fall towards you and get you.
But honestly, using a lightsaber as static defense is probably a better idea. Turn it on, vice it in place, put it in a chokepoint. Zombies kill themselves.

>>725218015
I wish they made a conclusion, maybe animated so that is cheaper.

>>725219109
"Rec3" seemed to treat a Chainsaw in a credible manner, it cut some zombies but stopped working fairly quickly.

>>725219221
Please give me zombie films where humans aren't the real monsters

>>725219465
Isn't I am legend pretty much that?

>>725219317
The momentum thing is true, but if you aim for their heads each time it would cut through them like butter and eliminate not only the zombie but the only way for them to get at you, their mouth.

>>725218620
if we're picking fictional weapons, I call dibs on the Ironman suit.

>>725184392
This is what pisses me off, they never address this.
How many people saw the new 28 years later? (fucking shitty movie). They not only had hordes of zombies, but a bunch of fat zombies that crawled around after worms.

>>725217281
If you mean this i have no idea, maybe decoration? doesn't look to me like it serves a practical purpose.

>>725216242
>Real world is not like video games
Important to note
Video games and films tend to upsize weapons a lot, and emphasize weight as though that makes it good in itself (I blame the Odyssey, personally. The bow with so much draw strength that only one guy can use it was too cool an idea to leave alone). Most real weapons look pretty weedy and unimpressive if you've been around video games a lot, but this is because the difference between swinging something that weighs 2 pounds, and 8 pounds is MASSIVE, and if both kill the guy anyways, you want the two pounder.
Bludgeons get this the worst, most warhammers are pretty slim, not the fucking sledgehammers you see in a lot of media.
Hitting something quickly and accurately is worth way more than obliterating something inconsistently.

>>725218620
It cuts through everything like butter so obviously it would be good against zombies. Just be smart and point it away from you and don't start doing acrobatics like a movie jedi.

>>725219646
bottle opener

>>725213546
Nah
Plate doesn't really hold up well to having a lot of force applied to the plates AWAY from the body, and each zombie trying to grab you, and pull you towards them is exactly what plate doesn't like, and actually trying to fight with like three zombies holding your arm in armor is impossible.
It's absolutely solid against small numbers of them though. You'd probably be better off with just chain though. Just as impenetrable, but much lighter, and has less convenient handholds for zombies to get ahold of your limbs. And if you're thinking chain, remember we live in the 21st century, technology has improved, get a shark suit instead. A shark suit holds up to sharks. Sharks bite much much harder than humans.

>>725211717
I remember in state of decay 2 there's a curveball that let's zombies survive if you behead them, creepy

>>725219621
I want an armored core.

>>725219465
return of the living dead, though it's a parody kinda. still a creepy film.

>Spears are in Zombie games
>It's shit

I fucking hate Lemmy with every fiber of my body

>>725189382
BAH GOD, TENTACLE KNIGHT IS GOING FOR THE BRAIN BUSTER
BAH GOD THE HUMANITY

>>725218620
You duct tape it to a doorway and blast ram ranch to turn it into an idle/clicker game

>>725220386
Spears are pretty good in Zomboid although.
They have been nerfed in Build 42, but they are still fast and hard hitting weapons.
Blunt weapons do not get enough love in Zomboid. While there are tons of different blunt weapons, a good 95% of them are irredeemable garbage and there are like 5 worthwile ones.

>>725220078
same thing in nightmare creatures. beheading doesn't kill them, you have to cut them in half. it's like the opposite of resident evil.

>>725220806
It's super amusing to nuggetify a zombie by cutting off the legs, arms and head, then chucking them around

Dogs are immune to the zombie virus.
I am just gonna send my dog to kill all the zombies for me and they won't be able to infect him. This is gonna be how I will bear the zombie apocolypse.

>>725218620
Yeah, assuming that not being force sensitive won't fuck you over because the blade will feel unwieldy which could lead to a fatal mistake.

>>725221970
If you can use a chainsaw and not hurt yourself, you can use a lightsaber.
The lack of inertia or impact resistance is a learning curve, sure, but it's not rocket science. You won't be able to do flips or anything, but just poking people with it is easy enough

>>725222394
meawhile a shitton of people have hurt themselves with a chainsaw irl...

You should start every zombie apocalypse by creating duct tape armor.