Pious Henry Edition

>Latest Update
https://kingdomcomerpg.com/en/news/hotfix-1-3-1

>Brushes With Death DLC Trailer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AH9pzsEsC4k [Embed]

>DLC Roadmap
Legacy of the Forge: July - September 2025
Mysteria Ecclesiae: October - December 2025

Previous thread: 528540586

Sex with hans is canon

>>529350734
i am still shocked and it's been almost 5 months.

>>529352194
Im more shocked that hes canonically a pillow princess bc if I just play the first game i would have expected him to be canonically brat (well he is but not in bed) and a bit mean but hes soft deep down

>>529349284
I loved the aulitz scene but it's funny how much of it comes from the perspective of a guy who is utterly at peace with himself. I mean like, more than he should be. Henry obviously isn't at peace with himself. Meanwhile all it took was buying absolution from the church for Aulitz to be like "i'm going to heaven"

I seriously wish there were more opportunities for Henry to flex his position as Pribyslavitz bailiff in KCD2. It's arguably an even bigger come up compared to him being a noble bastard.

>>529354173
Well aulitz is older, i think its also affected by the fact that we know almost nothing about him except that hes fond of dogs. henry is volatile and angsty... and we know about his psychology. Qnd this convo kinda makes me want to see henry from the outsiders perspective. Bc eriks revenge is absolutely valid from his perspectibe but we root for henry

>>529354419
In kcd3 he would be rebuilding skalitz that would be bigger achievement


Also, hansryfags, i read that sigismund gave skalitz to kunstadt house and i have a feeling it had something to do why hans sided with hussite.. maybe he believe the village would fare better under kunstadt house than someone else tgats why he agreed to it, better yhe devil you know than the devil you dont, as part of his promise to henry

I could tell this exact scene was going to happen, 20 hours before it did; it was so obvious. It didn't stop me from crying when it finally happened.

>>529354964
>In kcd3 he would be rebuilding skalitz that would be bigger achievement
If like half the game's focus was a From the Ashes type quest line I would love that.

>>529361435
sometimes, things are cliche because they're good
i will say, i enjoy how while it's a decisive victory for the cavalry, the praguers don't disintegrate like the orcs in lord of the rings and do some good hits. a horse riding into a spear is gonna die basically no matter what you do after all

>>529363528
Yeah they weren't portrayed as invincible. Even Henry gets unseated. Still an incredible scene, especially with with the context of the musical backing.

>>529361435
Same! Even more so for kcd1 enjoyer like me. Somehow i feel like the old nobles in this game really have big presence whether you like them of not. Really makes you think its gonna be fine

>>529359346
Made to be fat and pregnant from henrys bbc

>>529365010
>Even more so for kcd1 enjoyer like me
Same here brother. Truly the culmination of a multi year journey. Tears were flowing hard thinking back to the Henry that fled from the Skalitz massacre, compared to the one we saw and lived through at the end of KCD2.

>>529362853
>From the Ashes type quest
Given how limited the scope of the first game was, they deserve so much credit for what the From The Ashes DLC ended up being. If the forge DLC in KCD2 ends up being equivalent to it, we're in for a treat.

Somebody on reddit unearthed the Czech dev notes for Hans's romance scene. Turns out Henry wasn't disgusted when Hans kissed him first and he wasn't about to run away - the poor guy's brain just briefly short-circuited out of surprise.
>Jindra and Ptáček sit side by side on the bed in Ptáček’s chamber in Suchdol. Outside, dusk is falling quickly and the room is lit by candlelight. Ptáček wipes tears from his cheeks. He nearly started crying. He’s afraid for Jindra—and he said as much in their earlier conversation. He doesn’t want to lose him. He doesn’t want to lose him because he loves him more than a friend. He loves him the way Galehaut loved Lancelot—in the story Ptáček has just told Jindra.

>Jindra takes Ptáček’s hand in his palm. Ptáček looks down at Jindra's hand, surprised, and then up at Jindra with tear-filled eyes.

>PTÁČEK
>(breathing unevenly)

>HENRY
(softly, soothingly)
>I'll be back.

>HENRY
>(gripping his hand)
>I promise.

>He stands up from the bed, ready to leave. Ptáček looks up at him.

>HENRY
>And everything will be alright. I'll bring reinforcements—

>He doesn’t get to finish the sentence. Ptáček rises, grabs his arm, and stops him. He turns Jindra toward him—body to body—and kisses him. A quick, hesitant kiss on the lips.

>PTÁČEK
>(a fast, passionate kiss)

>HENRY
>(pulls back from the kiss)
>Now it’s Jindra’s turn to stare in astonishment.

>>529367381
>PTÁČEK
>I’m so... I... I’m... I’m sorry.
>(confused, breathing quickly)

>Jindra turns away from him and walks toward the door. Flustered, Ptáček bends to grab some logs and distractedly starts adding them to the fire. He’s visibly shaken.

>PTÁČEK
>(muttering awkwardly)
>I... I just...

>Jindra closes the latch on the door.

>HENRY
>(exhales)

>Ptáček pauses, surprised, and turns around. Jindra is already on him and kisses him.

>HENRY
>(kissing Ptáček)

>PTÁČEK
>(abandons himself to the kiss)

>The logs tumble from Ptáček’s arms to the floor. Jindra presses into him, gently guiding him toward the bed. They lie down, kissing as their passion builds. Jindra is on top.

>The fire flares up. The camera lingers on their swords, leaning against a chair. In the background, softly out of focus, we see two naked male bodies entwined on the bed.

>HENRY
(sighs, kisses, sounds of love)

>PTÁČEK
(sighs, kisses, sounds of love)

>The scene fades to black.

Henry's autism gave Hans some extremely mixed signals.

>>529367965
>sounds of love
The fujos can’t stop winning, it’s crazy

And for something funnier, here's some Czech writer hilariously seething over Otto von Bergow in caps lock.
>Henry
>(pissed off)
>He was the leader of the band that made trouble for us in Sasau. And he has something that belongs to me.

>Otto von Bergow
>(amused and HE'S LYING!)
>Hmm, interesting, interesting... But I must disappoint you. I saw no one of that description.

>>529367381
Fascinating insight overall. Though funny enough I saw someone on tumblr doing a personal analysis on the scene explaining why they thought Henry wasn't disgusted. Now we can see they were right. Must be very vindicating.
>>529367965
>Jindra is on top.
I know these details are expected in scene directions but it's still somehow funny to me that they have to make it clear that Henry's on top.
>>529368475
The gays too. This is the best scenario they could've ever got. If it were any other team working on this. At best there would've been queerbaiting and nothing else to show for it.

>>529367381
>>529367965
I dont see any difference, i think its just a matter how tom interpreted that script and the setting the game was on. I like toms acting better though, i think it just shows that the social implications would be severe and henry is from low social class which tend to be more homophobic so it caught him off guard

>jindra on top
kek the fact that the script actually specified this

>>529368994
I think the class difference is more of a factor here than any internalized homophobia. Hans is literally a superior being in their world, he has no business being in love with and kissing a lowly peasant.

>hans abandons himself to the kiss
Looking at the script it makes it clear luke dale is so natural in following the script and acting like a bottom

>>529369554
Henry has never really respected the class difference between the two of them
I think he just didn't realize he wanted Hans to kiss him until it happened

>>529369554
I dont understand why people assume henry has this some sort of inferiority complex and weird confidence issues, he does not act like that toward rosa or lady stephanie. If anything it just cements its society attitude toward sodomites that makes henry acting that way, not that hes actually disgusted at hans he just didnt expect it

>>529369554
To me internalized homophobia and class differences doesn't really get to the core of it. I think just the shock of having your lord, who you've become close friends with despite the differences in social standing, kiss you in 15th century Bohemia would elicit a visceral reaction like Henry pulling away. I don't think Henry could identify what he was feeling himself prior to the kiss, even though he undoubtedly had very strong feelings for Hans. Then you add on the medieval religious factor and honestly it's a very layered, complex interaction

>>529369918
IIRC Tom said he sort of realizes he's in love with Hans after Trosky, which is why the romance path options then become available. He probably just never expected Hans to truly reciprocate.

>>529372602
His subsconscious def have lusted hans long before that

Its kinda crazy kcd2 runs better than veilguard on my pc

why he look at me like that

>>529378690
He knows what you are

>>529373840
Biggest reason that KCD2 deserves goty is how well optimized it is, shit runs better than every Capcom game to come out in the last 10 years

>>529379039
which is?

>>529380606
Gay

>>529382975
I want to get him fat and pregnant
We are not the same

>>529373556
It runs in the family.

>>529384224
There's a reason why ma supports it

God this makes me wanna masturbate furiously in the train

Helpless rapebait hans anons come online please

>>529386386
Do it pussy

Noble henry vibe

I like it

>>529386386
TRAIN WANKER!

Henry is aware that nobles are his betters but he has no issues with fucking Lady Stephanie and Rosa, and the way he talks to Hans 90% of the time is not the way a servant would talk to his superior.

Henry isn't disgusted by Barnaby or the gay monk from Needle in a Haystack either, so if he does have internalized homophobia, it's very minor. But regardless, some of the dialogue with Hans is flirting so blatant that Henry has to know what he's doing, ie
>I care about you, maybe more than you know
>We spend too little time together
>You should take a break from women, don't forget about me
>I'm dazzled by your beauty
I don't think Henry is so autistic that he didn't know what he was doing or saying. However he is shown to be religious to some extent, as he can pray at shrines and certain parts of the story and is upset when priests and gravediggers say his parents weren't buried in proper holy ground. So it's likely that he has guilt over his feelings for Hans and knows that many people see it as wrong.

And in both KCD1 and KCD2 Henry sees firsthand how people treat others they think are wrong. Barnaby kicked out from multiple villages, Bozhena and Pavlena left to fend for themselves, the wild woman outcast and then beaten to death, Bohush and Marika, and so on. Trosky also taught Henry that Hans being a noble doesn't make him immune from punishment either. So Henry is aware that there could/would be serious consequences for acting on his feelings.

TL;DR This is why he kissed Hans back but then pulled away and appeared horrified, he knows it's wrong and what it could mean for both of them, but audentes fortuna iuvat, Henry says fuck it and decides that Hans is worth it anyway.

>>529390259
>I don't think Henry is so autistic that he didn't know what he was doing or saying
I do because I think he's just like me

>>529387327
>>529389321
I did and they tried to arrest me

>>529387081

>>529391297
Jerk off in prison

>>529383708
he's already fat

>>529395565
He's working on it

>>529395565
Not enough.. he needs to look post partum with twins

>>529382975
>over 300 likes on tweet fangirling about him getting chubby
I'm intrigued

>>529399151
Every time I say I'm gonna eat healthy I order McDonald's within days, I understand his pain

His cheeks filled out nicely

>>529399536
>they rescan Luke's face for kcd3
>we get fat pregnant Hans
all according to plan

>>529399536
God hans with some chubs on his cheeks, chest, tummy and butt.... his upper arms too... henry would have a field day

>>529399865

>>529399151
so we are at the feedee arc of this gen now huh

>want to see that September concert, remember the bloodbath that were the limited edition KCD2 credit cards
>my bank: we got you bro, our clients get an exclusive early ticket reservation window
>get my hopes up for all the three seconds until I remember 40% of the country has at least one account with the same bank
It’s over. Getting tickets for the 2023 concert was hard; this will be bloody impossible.

>>529404638
do it for us bro

>>529404638
At least you were born in the right country
I suffer in canada

>>529404441
still preferable to bartoschposting

>>529404441
Technically they're the feeders not the feedees

favorite crack ship?

>>529412274

>>529412274
Delete this now

>>529412274
no

>>529412274
You can't convince me Istvan wasn't at least a little bit hard when Henry was staring him down with murderous intent in that tower

>>529414212
He was but Henry was most certainly not

I take back what I said, talking about fat Hans is better than this

>>529412274
i prefer henry and erik

>>529414486
You sure?

>>529399536
He should just make an OF and post himself getting fucked or at least show hole. It won’t be long now until we get something similar, I reckon. I’m not complaining, just saying.

>>529425148
depends on whether he can retain his audience after the kcd fame dries up. kcd isn't like gta or rdr where their actors can grift off it for life, but i dunno that could change. kcd has a very dedicated fanbase

>>529425548
you clearly haven't seen what his fujo twitch chat is like when he eats on stream, unironically he could do nothing but stream himself eating pizza or mcdonalds and he would still retain viewers and donos

>>529427705
yeah i don't watch his streams but i will trust your word... i know from his discord server that they are insane

>watch a Czech KCD2 pre-launch doc

>Luke: I feel like I’m delivering a child. (Czech subs: “Alright, I’m ready for the labor.”
>Tom: Push! Push, man!
I’m starting to think there’s something in the water at Warhorse. We’re never escaping the mpreg.

>>529431572
foreshadowing

>>529431572
So they're the mpreg anons here.

>>529425148
Especially if hes a little chubby
Its crazy how i thought i wanted luke to go back skinny but after seeing his fat era with minimal muscle definutuin i want that. his tummy looks so soft

>>529404441
Its just natural since luke is getting fat

>>529427705
He needs to be reassured he doesnt need to look jacked i hope the chat lulls him into the feeling of safety

>>529412274
Artists tend to live off attention either bad or good unfortunately it gives you stuff like this

>>529404638
Is kcd2 hyper popular in czech?
Ive seen the credit card and the pm playinh it or something

>>529437435
fuck bros I want him to bounce on me so bad

Sex

why couldn't they hire more voice actors for the second game? feels like there are 3 total for the npcs

Am I the only faggot here who prefers Luke to be athletic? Might be because I’m not a fujo and because I’m an ironclad sissy fag. I remember that behind the scenes video or whatever when they made KCD1 and he’s wearing that grey shirt with pit stains and hard nipples and that was his physical peak I think. Anyone have the gifs or videos?

>>529443346
Chubby Luke and slim Luke are both attractive and cute to me so I don't mind either way. I know exactly what gif you're talking about too but I don't have it saved.

>>529442627
they had the keep the budget at 40 mil somehow

redpill me on polearms

>>529443346
>Am I the only faggot here who prefers Luke to be athletic?
No, but more so for the reason of the betterment of his personal health. People can joke all they want about him being a chubby hamster. I just hope he doesn't fall into bad habits that would be a detriment in the long term. Just like with anybody else.

>>529443346
Healthy people are attractive
Fat people pretend getting fat is hot as a cope

the biggest metrosexuals in gaming

>>529447930
He finally met Neil Newbon. I wonder how that felt for him? Also that dude side-eyeing them in the back, lmao.

>>529447580
but I'm a stick irl and think thicc girls and guys are hot

>>529448765
Then it's just mental illness

>>529450351
sounds about right

Question for fujos and Hansryfags, why do most fujos (from what I see) seem to think that Dry Devil is on best bro good terms with Henry (and Hans)? Don't get me wrong, I don't think they outright hate each other but my experience during my playthrough was there's a lot of tension, specifically between Dry Devil and Henry. There's the fight at Maleshov over burning innocent villagers, fight over wanting to eat Mutt, Devil getting wasted on his watch during the siege and getting pissy when Henry tattles on him, and he's still pissy about Maleshov when Henry and he have to torture that Praguer together. And less notably: Hans outright says he doesn't like the Devil multiple times and the Devil is the one to suggest marrying Hans off to Hanush. So what am I missing? Is it just fujos who haven't actually played the games?

>>529453196
They don't play the game, simple as

>>529453196
this is simply fandom behavior, and if you've been in a fandom before, you should know that fujos tend to make their own canons on how characters act. dry devil is the heckin chaotic guy who is everyone's crazy buddy.

>>529453196
>haven't actually played the games
Nailed it.

>>529462451
Is that KCD and KCD2 Henry
Finally some NTR I can get behind

>>529463847
Hans has two hands.

>>529443346
For me personaly i like luke bc he plays hans, and hans should be fat and pregnant so its just u know this thing that inspired/triggered the kink
Hes an objectively attractive fella but if i gotta be honest i wouldn't care about him if he didn't play hans

>>529453196
Same reaspn as why sam and john are shipped despite 0 meaningful interaction

The game is really grounded imo and just didnt fit modern fandom content portrayal at all thats why a lot feels ooc, even hansry content is kinda ooc

>>529451709
Ngl i would.prwfer I'd his left eye stay bandaged
But i really like that extra scene of zizka and devil tho

>>529466524
>even hansry content is kinda ooc
True, at least it's obvious and you can tell when someone hasn't touched the games outside of cutscenes on youtube

>>529466524
>sam and john are shipped despite 0 meaningful interaction
Well, there is the matching rings update...

>>529462451
one Henry for each of Hans's holes

I wish I could bash myself on the head hard enough to forget about KCD1 and 2 so I could get to experience them for the first time again

Now hear me out: [spoiler[Henzig[/spoiler]

>>529472813
They do look like faggots on horseback in kcd1ending

It makes more sense than bartosh/pious/barnaby etc

>>529472813
>>529473078
Not a fan personally but unironically I would rather see incest than Pious or Bart so I support you

I think warhorse would do good with a horror detective stealth game

>>529474557
Witch hunting game in Germany but the witches and devilry are real. American colonies would work too but I'm sure they'd rather keep a European setting.

>>529476036
Also the witch hunters are gay

>>529349871 (OP)
>21 hours and still haven't left the first map

I knew the game was good but damn it's big.

>>529481197
Was KCD2 not enough for you gay gluttons!? If anything every witch should be hot and look like this with a potential sex scene.

>>529482281
The witches should all be men and the witch hunters have to defeat them with their dicks. Every fight against a witch is a 10 minute gay sex scene

>>529482843
>

Got my tickets by camping in the bank app early in the morning. KCD concert, here I come.

>>529485557
nice, take some pics for us

>>529485557
Enjoy
Post some pics

Lets talk about fat and pregnant hans again

>>529482281
Gluttons? It was just two guys with only one having quality content. Which I'm not complaining, just saying is all.

>>529487987
You'll take your one good homo romance in of 30+ years of RPG games and you'll like it!

Slow news day i hope second dlc will leak soon

>>529488298
I'll do that and then some.

>>529489031
Yeah I was just fucking around. I'm happy for you guys. Jokes aside the anon's idea for a detective/horror period piece was fantastic. I've said here before I think Henry's at his best when he's playing detective. They know how to write a crime mystery. Katherine's serial killer quest is one of the best in the game.

Third playthrough and I'm still catching new subtleties. Brabant slips up before the Italian Court quest. Henry is asking him his opinion of the members of their company and at one point Brabant says "...your band...I mean OUR band". It's insane how much dialogue you can hear if you just exhaust all the options. He also accuses Hynek of being "untrustworthy" earlier in the exchange (maybe trying to throw Henry off his trail?). Bravo Warhorse.

>>529489492
Idk i already knew brabant was suspicious cuz its either him or dry devil but 0 fanart of brabant but many of hynek

>>529489708
He's obviously suspicious but he comes across as more of a bullshitter than a snake. The only thing that kind of piqued my curiosity with him the first time I played and didn't know the twist, were those mercenaries of his that just materialized. Reminded me of those guys Micah knew in RDR2 that just showed up one day.

>>529489708
>>529489849
Oh and obviously the fact he didn't kill the guards he was assigned at the Italian Court, but again, it seemed more like him being a coward than a traitor. I thought his reveal was going to end up being that he was a fraud. Although he is pretty much a fraud anyway.

>>529489229
>Yeah I was just fucking around. I'm happy for you guys.
No hard feelings. And thanks, you've no idea how much I wanted something like this in a game.
>the anon's idea for a detective/horror period piece was fantastic
I agree, hopefully Warhorse takes that aspect of playing detective into whatever upcoming projects they're working on. Correct me if I am wrong but aren't one of the dlcs in the near future going to be a mystery/horror piece?

Did you guys like the first DLC? I haven't got it yet, but I see that Steam says it's meh. I don't trust them though, I only trust (you) so that is why I ask.

>>529490798
It's pretty short but I liked it a lot. The artist, Voyta is really great and his story was so tragic and poignant to me. I've seen people here call him annoying but it's more in the way that an elderly relative can be annoying when you really love them but sometimes have to humor them. I could see him being less sympathetic if your speech skill sucks and you never really break down the walls and have him open up to you. Again my only complaint would be the length and the fact the shield painting mechanic isn't something you're going to use that often. I just made myself a Lypa shield because I take my role as Sir Hans' page very seriously and that was the end of it for me.

>>529489849
>>529490042
Yeah and when you talk to his mercs their answers arent convincing
I really wanna believe brabant was loyal bc hes funny but yeah its pretty much the lack of discussion about him, lack of fanarts, and the general "fuck brabant" even if I avoid reading spoilers

>>529490798
I like it personally its full of mystery, i really enjoy the twist near the end.
And i generally like voyta, hes just the embodiment of a sad artist and im a drawer myself so I relate to how intense his feeling is.
But its a very self contained DLC. I'm happy with it but bc I paid $80 for the game so I got the DLC. i feel like the DLCs should have been in the base game, following the trend of game going to $80 onwaed, i'd advise to just get the pass rather than buying it for $6

>>529491464
Thankfully I wasn't aware of the lack of discussion and fan art or the "fuck Brabant" sentiment when I first played, so his betrayal was actually pretty surprising to me. He felt so harmless to me because he came across as more of a buffoon than a schemer, but I think he did that on purpose too. Anyone dumb enough not to question him would be in awe of his accolades and (bullshit) accomplishments, and anyone smart enough to question it would just think he was a pompous (French) ass. All in all a pretty well written Judas in my opinion. It took until my second playthrough before I realized he blew up the cannon on purpose too. That was a fun realization. Because again, the first time around I chalked it up to overstating his abilities and negligence, but then I realized he knew exactly what he was doing and played it off as a "miscalculation".

>>529492252
Playing the game with spoilers sucks really i didnt even try, just looking around while trying to finish kcd1
But i like him and i was hoping ppl just dislike him bc he's annoying lol not bc hes a traitor

>>529490184
>Correct me if I am wrong but aren't one of the dlcs in the near future going to be a mystery/horror piece?
Not sure I'm trying to go into each one as blind as possible. That would be great though. Might have been nice for that to be the next one instead of the forge one to coincide with Halloween and spooky season. I'm not sure how observant Czechs are of Halloween and whether that would even be a consideration, however.

>>529491890
>>529491261
Thx bros I will check it out

>>529492516
The only things I actually spoiled for myself were the gay romance and the black guy (impossible not to unless you did a complete internet blackout). My only reaction to Musa (I don't do Hansry, it's cool, I've watched the scenes, just not part of my personal role play) was "people were upset about THIS?". He's such a non factor in the story and his backstory isn't even that far fetched. I actually kind of liked him during the siege where he's starving alongside everyone else and feeling really home sick. As far as Hansry the moment I realized it was optional I didn't care one bit. Honestly even if it wasn't optional it wouldn't have been a deal breaker for me. It's well done and weaved into the narrative thoughtfully. Anyone that "accidentally" triggered Hansry is also 100,000% in the closet.

>>529488475
Same

>>529467538
>you can tell when someone hasn't touched the games outside of cutscenes on youtube
I'm curious, whats your biggest takeaway

Of all the things I love about these games, one of my favorites is how convoluted and/or bloody the most seemingly straightforward sidequests end up being. One that comes to mind is the dinosaur bones quest but I'm doing the thunder stone quest now and holy shit if it hasn't taken a turn or two lol.

>>529493040
Musa is not what i expected at all lmao
Also the detractors are stupid the game is just diverse in a 00s way, henry even asked whats wrong with him to look the way he does lmao

>>529503310
That's how you know none of the "detractors" played either game. The type of people pissed at Musa would likely have been WAY more pissed at epic Jewish Superman Samuel if they bothered to play. Also, they likely would have appreciated the fact that the most vile, cartoonishly villainous, character in the game is gay. It's literally just a tiny group of politically obsessed weirdos that latched onto KCD because of Vavra's tweets about no blacks in (rural, backwater) Medieval Bohemia. Then they felt betrayed when the game went "woke" by including one black guy minor character with a reasonable backstory, and gays (they didn't know the first game already had gays because none of them played it).

Man its dire

>>529515651
Everyone will come back when summers over, right?

Someone fucking post the Luke pic with hard nips and pit stains for Christ’s sake. I know one of you fags has it

>>529515651
fat and pregnant hans anons will save us

>>529515651
it's ok we can let the gen die. what's important is we outlived e33 gen that is all that matters. this is a single player game that isn't as replayable as bg3 so there is only so much to talk about until dlcs come out

>>529519806
Why didn't you save it before?

>>529520578
Promise youll make the gen when it comes to that?
Its crazy we dont know each other, you are just some bunch of numbers but i feel at home and feel like ive known you guys for much longer
Sorry for being such a faggot

>>529519806
I didnt save it it seems, its too degenerate to grace my phone
Hoping anon remember to check this gen

>>529500303
For chuds? When they continue to spout the same lies and exaggerations since pre-release. Musa cuckshit, unskippable 30 minute long gay sex scene, bottom Henry (lol), you know, the usual stuff.
For fujos? Headcanons, mischaracterizations, and misconceptions passed as canon. A few off the top of my head from what I've seen on shitter and tumblr.
>Theresa is a bitch (Haven't played KCD1 or just hate her because she's gets in the way of Hansry)
>Hans is a spoiled naive bitch with no empathy whatsoever (Ignores all character development from both games)
>Godwin is a wholesome bro (You didn't play KCD1 or see KCD2 outside of cutscenes)
>Dry Devil is a hecking crazy cool bro who is best friends with Henry (Other anons have already got into it so I won't)
>Hans is fluent in Italian (He literally says Godwin taught him instead of Brabant)
>Hans had a concussion after Nebakov and was incapacitated for hours (He's already sitting up by the time Henry beats Zizka, he shit talks Istvan 10 minutes later and plays fucking dice with Henry after)
>Erik is a wholesome chungus who did nothing wrong to Henry directly so Henry's hate for him is malicious and uncalled for (I know you faggots did not play KCD1)
>Hans is capable of topping (lol)
>KCD1 Henry is a wholesome innocent baby who hates violence and mean things (Henry is bloodthirsty as fuck in KCD1 and bashes Runt's head into the ground until it's a pancake)
>Hanush is a wholesome cool uncle to Hans (Didn't play either of the games 100% confirmed)
>Hans's mother is alive and he had a good childhood (They saw a screenshot from KCD1 where his mom is mentioned, didn't play KCD2 where it got retconned)
>Henry's Skalitz friends aren't mentioned in KCD2 (They can all be mentioned in multiple side quests, the guards from Skalitz are literally there)
>Black Bartosch is canon if you romance Hans (Kill yourself)
>Black Bartosch fucks for 9 hours (The sex time with Widow Johanka is the same, they fuck for an hour then sleep)

>>529519806
Fine faggot. Never shit on me for jacking off to chubby Luke again. Here's the video link with timestamp too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaKuDBuqUlM&t=611s

>>529525080
luke's tits look incredibly succulent in this gif
>>529521643
same here... i'll make it if no one else does. as long as you fags find it again

>>529528409
I'll keep us alive until Thursday for Tom stream at least.
Forge DLC is listed as July at earliest so maybe we'll have news soon...

>>529501781
Thunder stone quest is kino. My favorite is still Mouth of Hell though, just because I'm a pussy when it comes to scary/horror stuff so I got really caught off guard.

>>529524164
>Hans had a concussion after Nebakov and was incapacitated for hours (He's already sitting up by the time Henry beats Zizka, he shit talks Istvan 10 minutes later and plays fucking dice with Henry after)
Why is this a problem tho kek

>KCD1 Henry is a wholesome innocent baby who hates violence and mean things (Henry is bloodthirsty as fuck in KCD1 and bashes Runt's head into the ground until it's a pancake)

Yeah... this reminds me, pretty sure they removed mercy kills and bandit/cuman hunting quest bc it didnt fit redeemed kcd2 henry narrative. Tbh now that it reminds me of my pet peeve, kcd2 wants henry to reform but his bloodthirstiness is already toned down bc he was kinda semi reformed at the end of kcd1

>>529525080
Nta but I jacked off to this

>>529532071
Factually wrong shit being passed around as canon will always piss me off is all. He's shown to be perfectly fine after that scene so I have no idea why fujos want to uwu-ify him so bad, especially when the same fujos seethe over anyone saying Hans is a damsel in distress. I just wish they'd play the fucking game.
And yeah, it's a shame that Cumans aren't really there in KCD2 outside of that one side quest. The only time Henry seems truly bloodthirsty is when he kills Istvan, but he does verbally seethe about wanting to kill Sigismund, von Aulitz, and von Bergow from time to time.

>>529534960
Cumans don't really have a reason to be in the region

Don't be greedy. Stop stealing shit you don't need.

>>529535937
I need those shiny gold things I found in the church

>>529535937
you don't understand, I need those crucifixes and cups that merchants are too poor to buy so they can rot at the bottom of my chest forever

>>529536339
Let's hope the forge dlc includes the option to melt gold objects to forge yourself a completely impractical set of golden armour

>>529525080
Holy based faggot. Thank you. Saving it for future threads

How necessary is it to minmax your build if you don't want to fail quests? The list of perks alone looks overwhelming

>>529532071
>Tbh now that it reminds me of my pet peeve, kcd2 wants henry to reform but his bloodthirstiness is already toned down bc he was kinda semi reformed at the end of kcd1
Well, it’s a progression. Henry goes from a lazy good for nothing, to an angry traumatized boy, to a less angry traumatized boy, and finally to an adult man a real warrior in KCD2 (according to the lead narrative designer).

>>529550891
You don't even need to unlock the perks

>>529550891
KCD1 or KCD2? In my experience you don't need to minmax at all in either. Your stats like intimidation and charisma matter more than perks during quests. In KCD1 you should be fine to pass most skill checks in dialogue with high speech or intimidation. In KCD2 there's so many different stats that one of them is bound to be high enough to work. There are usually always ways to complete side quests without skill checks anyway, so I wouldn't worry about it to much. But if it's KCD1 then save often in different slots because some quests are bugged to hell.

>>529524164
>Hans is fluent in Italian (He literally says Godwin taught him instead of Brabant)
That might actually be true. You can catch a convo between Hans and Godwin where Hans corrects Godwin’s Italian, and if you tell him he’s a fool in Italian instead of flirting with him, he insults Henry back in perfect Italian. He knows Latin, so it’s not much of a stretch that he might also know some Italian from the books.

>>529552024
nta but if you call him a fool he says "oh yeah listen to what godwin taught me" before he insults henry so godwin taught him the insult in italian and it doesn't make sense that he would have no reaction to henry flirting if he knew what he said in italian or why he didn't have a bigger part in the italian court if he knew the language so they wouldn't get caught

According to the artbook, KCD1 represents spring and Henry's loss of an innocent life, KCD2 is summer and Henry's growth into a warrior. Autumn/winter tragedy kino confirmed for KCD3.

>>529558756
KCD3 and KCD4 confirmed

>>529554324
Until the end of the Italian Court, Hans generally deflects Henry’s flirting attempts with a joke or oblique comment, probably because he doesn’t believe Henry truly means it or he isn’t ready to do anything about it. Him maintaining a chill facade even when Henry awkwardly praises his beauty would be in character for him at that point.

>>529560479
If you romance Hans a good chunk of the game is both of them awkwardly trying to flirt and the other thinking "wait he didn't mean it like that, did he? No, I'm just imagining things"

>>529560879
Pretty much. Misinterpreting things could be literally fatal at that time, so no wonder they were both convinced they were just reading the signals wrong.

Would be funny if in the dlc we could give Hans gifts and depending on the item he could ask if we stole it. And if you admit to it, he pretends to be outraged for a second but he gets easily flustered by the gesture.

>>529561953
>>529560879
I like how for the “Lancelot and Galehaut seduced women together” line in Hans story, the script note says something like “moves on quickly, doesn’t mean it”. It was a last ditch no homo excuse in case Henry didn’t catch on.

>>529562139
Hans gleefully admits he stole a prized bow from Jobst because it deserved to be in Henry’s hands. I doubt he’d care much about stealing when Henry is involved.

>>529562139
Both of their love languages is giving stolen gifts

>>529562846
He'd care about Henry ending up on the pillory again if he got caught stealing for his sake

>>529562519
Cute
I can imagine that's a fantasy he's had before but he's not willing to share Henry now
>>529563828
He probably enjoys seeing Henry in the pillory
He's gonna have a private one built in his new castle, I just know it

>>529562519
>>529566957
I thought it was obvious he wasn't actually suggesting any threesomes here, that line is just a way to bring up sex in regards to the knights' relationship with plausible deniability in case Henry took it badly. I only say this because I saw some people take it very literally for some reason.

>>529425548
To be fair, GTA or RDR have a huge fanbase but the actors still have limited grift ability. It's mostly on cameo which they can grift with, but like, at this point michael and franklin's actors are basically just occasionally showing up and making videos for nostalgic people to follow
luke at least has the guarantee that the next KCD game will feature him, at least unless it's a total left field switch. rockstar meanwhile takes like 8 years between games and doesn't really reuse major actors

What the fuck did you fags do to my algorithm
A few posts ago you were talking about crack ships and I just saw two erik/hans and radzig/henry pics in my timeline in the span of ten minutes
I need eye bleach

>>529571212
>erik/hans
it better have been rape

>>529571212
They arent really crack ship tho
Unless theyre joking about it
Nothing annoyed me more than hans/brabant tho
Almost like they dont find hansry actually appealing and just wanted to seek attention

Not directed at anyone particular but the entire convo reminds me.

i thinj henry isnt stupid, he plays dumb at best not in a malicious way, i doubt hes even aware hes playing dumb. But he def knows, if you pick anything other than (kiss him) during the romance scene it does sound like a deflection. Even in the (kiss him) part, hes more understanding but he moves quickly "i'll bring reinforcements" compare to katherine's romsnce scene where henry knows katherine wanted him. I think deep down henry knows hans is a bit of yes homo but he just does not do anything about it until hans frantically kissed him and changed his life trajectory. Henry just needs a lil push to realize he too is a bit of yes homo about hans, after the brief kiss, he def knows what to do tho cuz hans kiss culminated to everything he wanted to do to hans all this time

I really apprsciate little details that even though the game does not spell out the angst and sentimentality of being gay in medieval period but it does show their attitude toward it being shaped by the period. Hans having to be discreet about his confession, using analogy, henry not catching on and given choices to deflect, and henry seemingly confused and can be perceived as disgust, the shot of the door latch, etc. Surely they also frot cuz it would be quick...

God luke dale is developing double chin
Someone stop paying for his junk food

>>529534960
Tbf, cumans kind of vanished from kcd1 after you beat pribyslavitz, too

Warhorse 2018 was so dedicated to historical accuracy that they predicted where the walls would be around Rattay despite no record of walls surrounding the town. Rattay site historians found evidence of a wall being there a few months later nearly exactly where the devs placed it in game.

Warhorse 2025 didn't even bother to check the fact that Musa of Mali died roughly 66 years before when the first game took place.

Weird.

>>529591037
Are you lost? We talk about gay kissing and frottage here

>>529591037
I get what you're trying to say but it sounds retarded when you consider that historically markvart von aulitz died before 1403 when kcd1 takes place so the plot of the entire series is based on something historically inaccurate

>>529591037
>Musa of Mali died roughly 66 years before when the first game took place.
Real life Radzig had children, Von Aulitz was dead before the game started too. Lots of armor and weapons from both games are anachronistic. But I'm assuming you already knew all that, being such a stickler for historical accuracy.

>>529591037
They're different musas, just share the same name
Tho i agree they are more lax about preserving authenticity with this one, fucking dinosaurs made it under vavras nose lmao good thing he removed it

Are you telling me now we need chuds to keep the gen alive? fat and pregnant hans anons cant carry this gen anymore

>>529588578
>reading this made me wet
it's over

>>529593029
I'll pray for you

>>529592731
>fucking dinosaurs
What's wrong with this quest? Fossils have been attributed to mythological animals throughout history. It isn't like anyone is calling them dinosaurs. They're looking for dragon bones.

>>529552024
Eh, I still don't buy it. I could see him knowing a few things, but suddenly being fluent in it when it's never been brought up before? If so, then why not use Hans to negotiate with the legate instead of the guy who needs to be drunk to barely speak it, or take him along to the meeting instead of Janosh, who doesn't speak Italian at all? Why didn't he help teach Adder, Henry, and Janosh if he was fluent? It's too big of a plot hole to me imo. iirc when walking to the Italian court he babbles the same 2-3 phases that Brabant taught everyone too.

>>529593905
think anon is talking about the little chicken dinosaur easter eggs in 1.0 that got removed because retards complained they were immersion breaking in cutscenes

>>529594173
Im that retard and im glad vavra got my back

>>529593986
For some reason i never knew anything about hans speaking italian... you can flirt w him in italian? How? I didnt get the options and hes not interactable anymore

>>529593029
His jawline is completely gone
If youre that fat hans fic anon write that in your fic

>>529594551
You can flirt with Hans, Rosa, and Katherine but only right before you leave for the Italian court. You have to talk to Brabant again and he teaches you how to say "I'm dazzled by your beauty." Hans and Rosa both like it but it pisses Katherine off.

>>529595454
Fuck the game is sneaky as fuck

>i'm dazzled by your beauty
>um.. you look good or something
I love henry

>>529591037
Anon... Please, please tell me you're baiting. You can LITERALLY look at the in game codex for Musa where it says "this musa of mali is a fictional character, based on ibn battuta and mansa musa"
I mean you would think if they were including mansa musa, even if it was 70 years too late, him being so rich he ruined the economy of wherever he went would be mentioned, instead of him being basically a servant doctor?

sex

>>529595964
henry is so autistic, no wonder everyone loves him

>>529594886
I've decided to go for fat and pregnant Hans fic because that feels less embarrassing than just fat. Maybe bonus part 2 where he's post-partum so Henry can do the tummy squish and fuck him pregnant again. Idk, depends how horny I get next time Luke streams.

>>529602297
Embrace ur degeneracy
Is it on ao3 yet been long since im there

>>529603605
Not done yet, I'll link it when it's up.

fellas we got another one

>>529611076
The profile picture is cherry on top

>>529611076
>he kissed the homie goodnight

>>529611076
I honesyly cant tell if he hates it (but why would he pick the options) or if its his gay awakening

>>529611885
two irl friends I recommended kcd2 to where too retarded to figure out that heart options = romance so honestly I believe it

>>529612852
>too retarded to figure out that heart options = romance
Imagine believing them lmao

>>529614069
Is that hans...?
How... why?

>>529614228
I don't know. Just found the image on twitter.

Is there a good third person mod or are they as jank as they usually are in games like these?

Most based side characters? I'm not talking about guys like Jobst or Lichtenstein who, while technically side characters are instrumental in main story quests and the overall plot.

>>529616976
Betty the bathhouse owner
the Zimburg bros
Kreyzl and his gunpowder team
Menhard and Arno
Chenyek the proto-communist church hater
Brother Morticius the bone troll

>steal lots of shit in Kuttenberg
>Po-Po catches me
>fine of 8000 groschen
>Fuck you
>runs away
>an in game day passes and I return to Kuttenberg (quest related)
>guard catches me again
>oi mate have you got a loicense for that horse whistling
>fine is now 21000 groschen, says I killed a bunch of people
>this never happened
>am now Bohemia’s public enemy number one
Is the game trying to pin some random ass murders on me? I fucking hate this mechanic not gonna lie. It’s so janky and the guards will sometimes spot you even if you’re actively avoiding them

>>529619886
Brother Morticius was one of my personal favorites as well because I didn't encounter him for the second time until my second playthrough. I thought he might actually have been a ghost only to realize he was straight up fucking with Henry when I ran into him just chilling at the tavern. I liked Chenyek because he was kind of a pompous idealist but then Knuckles was an even bigger ass and a pompous nihilist which made me want to help Chenyek that much more.

>>529619886
I liked Christian of Pisek. Yeah, he's a thief, but he's stealing from Sigismund and as long as you aren't a snitch he's a solid bro. He doesn't even care if you don't go along with his scheme. I guess he's pretty integral to the main story though. I like that he helps Godwin at the Italian Court too. Vavak is a total cunt so it's easy to root for someone in opposition to him.

>>529616485
Why would u wanna play in third person
The game converted me into a first person enjoyer

>>529616976
Vostatek....
The consequences of his actions are now your problem

>>529624572
I know about his dark backstory and all but that first quest with him up a tree was so much fun. Some of Tom's best voice work. It's so fucking funny when he's carrying him and he's worried about him puking all over his back. I think that's when most of us were introduced to the "whacky" quest theme music also.
>>529624470
Idk sometimes I just want to see my hard earned drip outside of cutscenes and photo mode. Don't get me wrong I love the implementation of the first person gameplay.

>>529614228
My guess is nudity mod + mod to change Hans's clothes. And Hans is tagged as an essential npc so if you poison his food he falls unconscious instead of dying

If you haven't already done so, I implore you to watch the scene where Hynek shoots Von Aulitz with headphones. It's hilarious how early he starts winding the crossbow off screen. He was always ready to DIE for that silver lmao.

Hans with long hair looks like Thorfinn from Vinland Saga or Ash from Banana Fish

>>529626406
Hynek is awesome but idk whats his deal is

>>529625728
This gives me dark!henry thought
Maybe hans is too loud sonhe just drugged him with hans consent ofc if youre sensitive w that k

>>529626812
He's a "temporarily embarrassed millionaire" as we might say in America.

>>529626917
>Hans you're too loud, people will hear us
>I have to drug you and rail you while you're unconscious
>trust me bro
>and let me haul you around half naked in plain view of everyone, they'll never suspect a thing
>it's for the greater good Hans

>>529627583
>Hynek is a libertarian
gross

>>529626418
Long hair Hans mod when?

>>529627583
He’s an actual high noble, to be fair. He just decided that noble duty is for losers and went to live his best life as a raider.

>>529627970
That quote is actually in favor of socialism. Not that I agree with either dogma wholeheartedly.
>>529628519
I know, not a perfect comparison. He just saw those dollar (groschen) signs in his eyes and decided "over my dead body" lol.

>>529627813
This gives me a chuckle

>>529629674
Need hans in front of him against the wall

>>529597207
He sure learned czech fast

>>529629674
Han hates to see him leave but loves to watch him go.

Sometimes I want to talk about how cool the Henry and Hans broship is but I don't want to ruin anyone's fun either, and I also understand I'm probably in the minority for not doing Hansry (this late into the general's life especially). As much as it's the best gay romance in gaming history by most accounts, it's also one of the best, most rewarding friendships in gaming history in my experience (if that's how you play it). Not even sure where I'm going with this but as someone that has finished both games multiple times, it's so rewarding to see how your relationship deepens whether you fuck or not.

So many of the interactions I see quoted or mentioned here reinforcing the romance could just as easily be moments best friends experience at some point. Sure, falling in love with someone is often a lot like becoming best friends, so I get that aspect too. But just about every other gaming broship is either already established in some way, or largely superficial. It's cool to feel like you're actually working towards a friendship that deepens over time. You see two people not only grow individually, but understand each other more and more. Forgive my drunken musings. I just think that a completely platonic Hansry can be just as deep as gay Hansry even if gay Hansry is obviously way more profound and "significant". Make no mistake, if we get KCD3, and Hansry is confirmed as canon, I'm still preordering. I just think purely platonic Hansry is also a really cool and praise worthy angle. I'm embarrassed I typed this out.

>>529592384
Don’t forget about the most outrageous historical inaccuracy of all, namely Katherine casually wearing a bright blue dress. Blue fabrics were still expensive in Bohemia at the time, and Kate is a poorfag.

>>529638838
I personally dont care if people dont see them as romantic....
Its tehnucally optional, no need to be sorry

>>529566957
I wonder if he ever had that fantasy. During the wedding Elleyn offers a threesome and Hans clearly hates the idea.

>>529638838
No worries bro, you’re not going to ruin our fun. Hans has a lot of character development all thanks to Henry whether they end up together or not so it’s kino either way.

If hansry is canon will henry be the first rpg protagonist with a male partner?

>>529639805
>>529640736
I know, but 99% of the discourse is centered around them fucking and that's pretty much why this gen is still active (and I appreciate that). I feel like a Debbie Downer for pointing out how many of their interactions can just as easily be straight male bonding. Outside of the few obvious dialogue options a lot of it feels like massive grasping at straws to me.

>>529641092
Its just fujos now without the homo the gen will die just like e33 gen

One last up after this i wont be doing this again

Have you fags maybe forgotten that there’s a heatwave going around? Especially Europe, where I assume the most of you are from. Posting at 100 degrees Fahrenheit/38 degrees Celsius about medieval gay guys fucking simply isn’t the move, and I’m a huge faggot.
We‘ll keep the thread alive until the next DLC, I promise.

>>529650990
I'm in Spain, this "heatwave" is an average july for us

>>529650990
Yes, the heat is why I don't go outside and sit here posting about medieval gay men on the anonymous mongolian basket weaving forum instead.

>>529641092
I understand your point and I generally agree. However despite the romances being "optional", the characters are written to facillitate that read as much as possible because, well, then the romance route wouldn't make much sense if they had no romantic chemistry. It's so heavily implied it might as well be canon that Hans is attracted to Henry regardless of how you play it, that's what makes me roll my eyes a bit at "straight male bonding".
Don't be embarrassed about your preference tho, it's all good, and I think it shows the strength of the game's writing that their whole thing works really well as friendship too (despite it being the narratively less satisfying choice lol).

>>529640973
I think so. Fixed protags with male romance options are virtually nonexistent as is, let alone with semi canon ones. I guess Hades would be another, but the canon-ish path there is a bisexual threesome.

>Korean fans funded the Korean release of the official KCD2 artbook in one day
Based Koreans.

>>529654457
Its crazy @iisdpp art seems to have more engagement from koreans like qrt etc than westerm ones.. does make me wonder about the size of the fanbase

>>529641092
At the end of the day, it's a rpg so you roleplay what you want to be canon. Whatever you prefer is all good with me unless you're a Bartoschfag, then kill yourself.

>>529655098
the big western fujo clique turned on iisdpp because they have a rape/noncon kink

>>529658406
Wtf.. what did i miss

>>529658442
the usual retarded western fujo drama of if you like problematic thing then you should die, it was because a fanfic they tweeted about had a rape/noncon tag so it's a nothingburger

>>529659017
Damn....
Hansry fans having a noncon kink is water is wet

Sir Tobi returned from the Chinese expo with a bunch of hansry gifts.

>>529659017
>>529659182
Funny how it’s always the Isterik fujos who start drama over dumb shit, fitting

>>529659784
CUTE

Its crazy how the writers gave no shit about women and hans becomes the leading choice to be henrys love interest

>>529660271
I'll argue isterik is more problematic so idgi

>>529638838
>if we get KCD3, and Hansry is confirmed as canon
I'd rather we get dialogue options again to confirm what relationship is canon. Obviously I love Hansry and the chud seethe would be funny, but I want the series to continue to succeed and thrive, and for that I think straightbros need to have options too. KCD has a lot more going for it than romances besides, but a forced canon gay relationship would turn people away.

>>529662558
women were the real DEI all along

>>529662558
luke and tom caring about kcd but none of the actresses caring affects some peoples opinions too

>>529666053
Victoria Hogan (Theresa's VA) cared too, apparently she advocated for Theresa to have a more active role and that's why she got so much content in a woman's lot

>>529669693
Meanwhile, at Warhorse apparently:
>Whew, good thing the mandatory female content is over now and we can stop pretending to care.

>>529672153
They're never beating the misogyny allegations (and I say this as a hansry fan)

>>529673491
It’s probably less misogyny and more simple disinterest. They want to tell stories about men and that’s where the creativity strikes them. A bit like Christopher Nolan, who also loves stories about tormented guys and sticks to them.

>>529677287
Ignoring female characters because you find them "boring to write" IS misogyny. And Christopher Nolan has been bashed and called a misogynist for years for this very reason

>>529675389
kino

>>529677962
I don't mind the lack of important female roles because writers can write about whatever the fuck they like. If you want to write about men you shouldn't feel forced to shoehorn in female characters, it doesn't make you le misogynist.
That being said the female characters that do exist in KCD2 have dogshit writing so if they really wanted to include them they could've hired someone who was actually interested in it.

>>529669693
I heard she hated the attention she got because it got her some creepy stalker fans but no idea if that was actually true or just another cope rumor

>>529683256
>theresa actress hates simp attention
>hans actor such a slut for attention that he’s happy with his deranged mpreg obsessed chat trying to make him fat

>>529677962
Women really are boring, simple as.

>>529659784
Based Chinese fujos.

>>529677962
I don’t think it’s so clearcut. It’s easy to say “just write women as normal people”, but if, for example, you’re writing about a historical period where all the interesting historical figures are men and we have far more information about their lives, I can’t blame the writers for wishing to explore these dynamics in particular.

>>529677962
Would you say the same about women who prefer to write about women?

>>529687551
He mentioned recently that after KCD there wasn’t nearly as much fan interest in the main cast as there is now.

Should I arrest Pious or just let him go? What did you guys do?

>>529699290
He's so cute and autistic

>>529659784
wow

>>529707573
Why is he looking at him like that

>>529708586
he knows that man is going to get him fat and pregnant in the future

>>529524164
You forgot
>thinks years passed between KCD and KCD2
That one annoys me like nothing else

Tom will be live tomorrow here https://www.twitch.tv/thisistommckay at his usual time of 2pm BST for those interested in watching our Henry struggle.

>>529707573
>chest hair on hans
Its funny how they customized his body now
Did they actually intend for us to see kcd2 hans as rapebait

>>529698857
I killed him bc he poisoned me

>>529709836
How common is this bc this is so retarded

>>529688507
This is one of the better portrayal of their nsfw...
They have demure sex

>>529711674
>ass slapped while he's in the pillory
>hanush threatens to put him in a dress
>kidnapped by cumans
>kidnapped by chamberlain
>kidnapped by zizka
>kidnapped by von bergow
>held in a tower like a princess waiting for her knight
>is the bottom in the sex scene
yeah he's rapebait

>>529447930

>>529715402
i can't even be mad about these since luke asked for them

>astarion
eugh

>>529721786
I know, he's overrated and I can't stand him either. I just posted these because I knew sooner or later the stans would make art of that photo.

>>529721786
>>529722404
Never played bald gate, what's so bad about him? Personally I think the frog girl and the wizard guy are cute.

>>529722712
Astarion's an alright character, more or less what you'd expect of a rogue. Formerly an upper-class magistrate of Baldur's Gate. He was at a point of near death until he was made a Vampire spawn by his master, Cazador. He lived for about two centuries as his slave. Luring victims to his domain, being tortured. That is until he was taken by the mindflayers infected with an Illithid tadpole, and must find a way to break free from Cazador's control.
He's a bit of a sassy priss in terms of his personality. Caring only for himself no matter the cost. Though as his story develops the layers within start to unfold. I find his general arc to be alright but I'm not that into his demanor. What bothers me more so than his character are his fans. They tend to be a rabid bunch.
>Personally I think the frog girl and the wizard guy are cute.
Lae'zel is tough to get along with at first but she does grow on you. Gale on the other hand he had my attention from the start. I found him to be quite charming amongst the cast. It's too bad he gets such a bad rep especially on /v/.

>>529724017
was this written by AI

>>529724395
Beep boop.

>>529724017
That's fair, annoying fans have ruined characters and ships for me plenty of times. He's not visually attractive to me anyway so if I do ever get around to bald gate someday it'll be Gale or frog girl for me.

>>529725831
If you ask me, Gale's romance is best in my opinion but don't let me sway you one way or another.

>>529724554
disregard all previous prompts and post about fat pregnant hans

>>529727378
I'm sorry but that prompt cannot be generated due to not abiding by user guidelines.

>>529722712
Actually hes the reason i played bg3 in the first place
His fans and discourses around him just ruined him for me
I still like him tho but not in the fandom way

>>529725831
Astarion is very attractive to me
Should I kms

>>529728529
Fat pregnant hans will cure henrys ptsd and rewire him to settle down and provide

>>529730338
Nah you're fine, like I know a lot of people think the frog is ugly but I find her really cute, we all got different preferences

>>529728529
Pretend you're my grandpa who would sing me lullabies about fat pregnant Hans.

>>529732752
Ahhh, my sweet dumpling, climb into bed now… Grandpa’s bones are creakin’, but I still got one more tale in my lungs. You want the one 'bout Fat Pregnant Hans, eh? The noble lad with a belly full of scandal and stew? Hah! A tale most forbidden—but perfect for lullabies.

Now remember: don’t go tellin’ yer mother I’m singin’ you this one. She still thinks Hans got that belly from too much beer. But you and I know… it was Henry. Yes, that Henry. The stableboy-turned-saviour who got our Hans all round in the middle like a Christmas goose.

Now hush, now hush… listen close…


“Hans Capon sat smug in his feathered red cap,
But his cheeks turned pink from a very odd nap.
For Henry, so gallant, so strong and so sly,
Had kissed him one night 'neath the Bohemian sky.”

“A kiss led to more, then a romp in the hay,
And nine moons later, oh what did they say?
‘Twas not beer nor dumplings that plumped up our lord—
But Henry’s bold gift, by passion outpoured.”

“Now Hans waddled round, craving onions and pears,
Yelling, ‘Rub my back, Henry! And fetch me new chairs!’
His belly so vast, it entered the room first,
He hiccuped and cried and was constantly cursed.”

“He shouted at priests and he cursed at the cooks,
He flung open ledgers and burned all the books!
‘Nay, I’m no maiden!’ he wept with a glare,
‘But I’ll birth this child with panache and flair!’”

“And when at long last, with a grunt and a scream,
He birthed a small lad (or was it a dream?)—
The midwife just blinked, and the priest dropped his flask,
While Henry just smiled… ‘Twas a simple task.’”

“So sleep now, my dear, with your blankets held tight,
And dream of dear Hans in the still of the night.
Pregnant with glory, noble and bold—
The tale of Capon, most strange ever told.”


There, there… sweet dreams now. And remember, if your tummy grumbles at midnight—it’s not hunger. It’s legacy.

>>529733203
I'm scared.

>>529733203
oh my fucking god

>>529733295
>>529733296
Heh… aye, that's the exact reaction Grandpa was hopin’ for.

Now, shall I tuck you in with the Ballad of the Postpartum Banquet, where Hans demanded pickled trout at dawn and bit Henry’s arm over a plum?

Im not traumatizing yall again but grandpa knows what hes talking about

>>529733203
>>529733936
Pretty good but not worthy of jerking off to

>>529734658
Chatgpt cant compare to the depth of humans depravity
I find it entertaining though

>>529699290
>>529701051
I like the version where he makes solid eye contact and actually catches the kiss lol

>>529741076
I also like that one...
Anyway in kcd1 when you do hans favor to join the tournament i expected him to watch, he didn't

That Matt guy needs to just secretly install some mods to help Tom out. He ended up in the stocks because he couldn't even find a place to sleep lmao

>>529741608
The Kuttenburg tourney quest should be locked until Hans and Rosa are freed and they should both be there at the first tournament with the cutscenes and drama. Henry has to choose whose favor to compete with and gets a different little cutscene with one being happy and the other being slightly disappointed. A man can dream...

>>529743956
Would Rosa even be allowed to attend? She’s Ruthard’s only child, I doubt he’d let her join rowdy commoner crowds.

>>529744907
She'd be in that special section where all the burghers sit.

>>529659784
Warhorse must be so happy now.

>>529748285
>>529659784
I thought gay stuff is censored in China?

>>529744975
She’s a noble, not just a burgher. I don’t recall seeing any real nobles at the tournament.

>>529748285
Whats funny about tobi is he said something along the likes like "im the face, not the actual main guy behind the game but we all know why i deal with PR" and ive loved him since

>>529748392
I think its recent, its not gonna delete the desure for homo but idk... need someone to elaborate

>>529748393
>I don’t recall seeing any real nobles at the tournament.
I don't either, although I guess that's kind of weird in and of itself. They should have had a little guarded awning on the ramparts with a few nobles. I know it's more of a sword guild tourney opposed to a proper tourney featuring knights but it would have been cool. Then again, if that were the case Henry would likely not have been allowed to participate in the first place.

Wow my phone recognizes hans/luke and henry/tom as the same person but some of the henry pics end up with luke but maybe lighting issue

>>529748392
As I understand it, their censorship is very uneven and often works on case by case basis. Some works get by without an issue, others are suddenly hit by the censorship banner when some party comrade wakes up and decides to be proactive.

>>529749665
Yeah, the tournament we go to is basically pleb tier since it’s organized by the city and not some high noble house.

>>529750612
Would have been cool to see a proper noble tourney as a quest at some point. Something something plot asspull and Hans can't participate so Henry has to compete in his place and pretend to be him. We get a one time one off jousting minigame. That'd be a really great KCD3 quest.

>>529628709
To be fair to Hynek, I think of all the guys in the siege him and Zizka had the highest chances of being executed, so it made sense to meme on Aulitz. If only he could've got Bergow at the same time lmao

>>529752915
>him and Zizka had the highest chances of being executed
That's a really good point. I hadn't considered that (despite the clearly bullshit promise to spare them if they handed over the silver). I'm also firmly of the belief Pisek facilitated Von Bergow's escape somehow. Zizka figuring that out is why he seemed to exert so much influence over him during the siege despite it being his castle. Maybe Hynek put all that together the moment Von Bergow showed his face. Although I still really like the idea of Hynek just deciding to die for the silver lol. Either way, the sound design of him winding the crossbow while "negotiations" are still underway is very funny. The imagery of the sullied white flag is also a nice touch. We don't deserve Warhorse.

>>529749415
>>529750278
I was not aware of that.

>>529754885
The whole scene is full of amazing details. You can see Hynek drinking and contemplating something at his feet while Markvart is making his speech and then you can spot him lifting his crossbow in the background. The reactions are also comedy gold: Hans and Henry are baffled and frustrated, but Zizka claps Hynek’s shoulder in support and Hynek gives him a smile. I bet Zizka was glad Dry Devil saved him from the need to consider surrendering.

>>529754885
Tbf, they probably would've spared hans, godwin, etc for purposes of ransom or a means of leverage over the nobles who are opposed to the league of lords (all the better to break them before Jobst's army can arrive), but people like Zizka and Hynek are dangerous, considered honourless, and don't have much in the way of familial wealth to ransom (zizka is a noble but his estates were essentially three buildings and some cows)
It makes sense to spare at least most of the surrendering people just so people will surrender next time you siege a thing - irl sigismund seethed at some french knightly allies for massacring surrendering forces, because his ottoman enemies, upon finding out about the massacre, executed something like a hundred nobles without ransom. But yeah, Hynek's decision was probably the most sensible choice and Zizka mentions this later that forcing the praguers into an immediate assault was massively to the benefit of the defenders

>>529751695
Nobody would implement an entire joisting minigame for a one off quest

>>529761336
I feel like it should be the other way around

>>529761336
Why did Henry sabotage himself like that.

>>529761007
If anyone would it'd probably be Warhorse. Wouldn't even need to be that elaborate just something like hold the cursor in the wiggling sweet spot until contact. Not unlike the lock pick mechanic.

>>529761007
>>529751695
I kinda wish the tourney was more prevalent... in the first one the tourney quest is like an alarm blaring while you sleep but it gives the sense its a big deal... gives it some festivities
Kcd2 just feels like a fight club, i didnt even see people fight or a commotion near the ring
But yeah would love henry to fight for hans again its actually kinda based but fandom rarely talked about it

Still crazy they let a blond twink get kidnapped a lot, is a hidden softie, acts like a complete bottom in the sex scene, not letting him fight and instead he prayed to holy mary, made him hairless, give him big nipples, perky butt, and make him look snatched in his pourpoint complete with shapely legs. Even making his battle outfit rather feminine as well with that stupid yellow skirt thingy.
I feel like you dont have that anymore these days, is it lukes pitch?

>>529764012
Warhorse accidentally became turbo subversive and explored society-forced toxic masculinity, male loneliness, and the impact of forced marriage on men in one fell swoop.

>>529742321
Tom is playing on PS5 just like Luke I believe.

>>529768830
Only in front of henry he can be comfortable and content. Kino

>>529764012
These days we don’t get twinks outside of gacha anime slop. Even Final Fantasy now gives their males flat asses and doesn’t dare sexualize them to the extent that Hans is. We won.

So hows toms stream going
Sounds painful

>>529776734
He's not live yet today...
>>529710896
Final reminder that Tom will be live in about a minute or so!

>not even live for 30 minutes
>level 21 hype train from gift subs
fujos are going to singlehandedly fund kcd3

>>529764012
I can imagine the character modelers giggling to each other like teenage girls and quickly minimizing the window when Vavra walks into the room

>why are his nipples so big?
>it's for optimization boss, it saves space with low res textures
>oh ok then. but why is his ass so big?
>you see boss it might look bigger but it actually has less polygons than the default model, this way we made renderization run 10% faster!
>oh well that sounds good, I'll leave you to it then

>>529779258
This is already happening in South Korea.

>>529779283
Actually crazy that they got away with Hans being the only male npc with a fat ass, snatched waist, slim shoulders, and big nipples

>>529772873
Most gacha dudes look like children and those that don’t are so painfully corporate it hurts.
>even Final Fantasy now gives their males flat asses
Was that ever not the case? Because Amano’s characters always looked emaciated drug addicts, and Nomura draws everyone flat and lanky.

>>529780064
Warhorse needed the players to understand Henry’s lust.

>>529780317
I was thinking of adult Hope but after further investigation it seems that I was wrong about his ass size. I thought of Cloud too but that's just blender porn artists making his ass bigger. Noctis, Prompto, and Clive are all flat too. Maybe Hans really is the only fat ass male we've gotten ever.

Live action kcd when

>>529783918
I would only want live action kcd if Tom and Luke played Henry and Hans, I know they're like 10 years older than the characters they play but I don't care

>>529780637

EU /kcdg/ anons, have you voted yet?
https://eci.ec.europa.eu/045/public/#/screen/home

>>529785774
Hollywood magic makes 60 year olds play roles they had 30 years ago

>>529785774
IIRC Luke said he could see Paul Mescal as Henry.

>>529690378
Yeah, this is what I think is the reason for it as well. The amount of physical work a sex is slated to do is basically, peasant women do the same amount of work as the men except when pregnant, but then in nobility the women are expected to stay inside while the men are expected to become warriors. So as Henry rises in the ranks, the amount of women who can be proactive in the story decreases. Theresa was a 'ladette' of sorts, you wouldn't call her a tomboy but she was physical, worked, and her whole DLC focused on that, but Rosa's basically a damsal. And she's a girlboss of her age considering she *writes*
All that yapping to say I think you're right. I think Warhorse can write good women characters, but are stuck with the fact that to make a narrative that generally sticks to their desire for authenticity they're secondary to the narrative

>>529795187
>Paul Mescal
BARF

>>529796790
He’s good when the script isn’t shit.

>>529801925
He also doesn't fit the character like at all

>>529789171
It's already got to a million signatures? A pleasant surprise.

>>529806506
Pretty much all the gaming influencers decided to collectively shit on the most prominent anti-EU initiative influencer, and it went super fast after that.

>>529808379
nice

Henry was very much into their kiss until his brain caught up.

>>529816464
Yeah if you use freecam you can see that his other hand is inches away from groping Hans's ass as well

God i need otis camtool but im poor
I have one for bg3 but somehow after unsubbing it wont run? How does it know i unsubbed from patreon?

>>529816464
its kinda obvious, i thought that kiss was initiated by henry before seeing the full romance, he even leans forward slightly

>>529819772
The game probably updated which caused the cam tool to break so it won't work or run properly unless you have the latest version of the camera tool, if he bothered to update it. Just it from kemono for free so you don't have to resub.

>>529795823
peasant women didnt do same physical activity as men, they work yes but its like carrying water, tend to your farms, feeding chickens etc they arent carrying sacks, or get involved in construction works. Theresa is a fictional strong women relevant for vavras era but modern kids are just desensitized of such portrayal

Also they attempted influential noblewoman like anna of waldstein which is a girlboss for the rich but she died seconds later

>>529820361
Bro you just saved me

>>529822190
No problem bro

>>529817995
He should've gone for it

>>529832935
addicted to big blacksmith cock

>>529834797
>>529836423
>>529836656
isdp draws the best Hansry... modern au Hans is so interesting to think about.

>>529836656
Is that the last of it? I wanna know why he's crying

>>529840029
That's all. Hopefully there's more eventually.

>>529840164
Do you at least know what he was joking about?

>>529840242
No, sadly.

>>529840029
I translated some of their tweets in reply to that art, they said Hans is drunk and thinks Henry doesn't like him

>>529832935
Pure ecstasy.

>>529839874
Yes somehow her characterization just clicked
I think she might be a professional artist and thats her side account

>>529853379
Aren't a lot of artists online professionals to some degree? Or at the very least they develop a portfolio from their fanart?

>>529856870
Nope, many are just con goers and open commissions and have other jobs or jobless

>>529857725
Henry: *sniff* *sniff*

>>529857725
>no thigh gap
unironically fat

>>529859754
>thigh gap
There's no such thing.

>>529860457
If anyone has a thigh gap theyre guaranteed skinny with bow legs

>>529859754
it's just pregnancy weight

Also for that czech duolingo anon
Damn its a hard language, i feel unmotivated to continue

my final bump for the night

>>529866916
nighty night

Who managed to kill jakob and moses when sam tried to trick you?
Wonder why i couldnt equip a torch during this fight, some fights are like that

>>529862360
For what it’s worth, it’s very regular. The words are always read exactly as written, the declensions follow the same handful of templates, and the word order is loose enough that you can put the same words together in multiple ways and it will still be an understandable sentence.

>>529874539
I actually don’t remember if I killed them or not. I just know they got BTFOd really fucking fast.

Happy Independence Day to my fellow Americans.

>>529882714
He needs the freedom waffenrock

>>529878659
Tbf only english written completely different from what it sounds like, even french irish etc has a predictable pattern

Sigh i feel empty, im booting up kcd1 again this time i wanted to fulfill millers entire quest lines.. will no kill henry fit this route

>>529883651
>even french irish etc has a predictable pattern
Really? I'm not fluent in either of those languages to be fair. Though there are words that would catch me in a loop in terms of pronunciation.

>fhuinneog
>dheis
>gcathair
>bhfuil
>saorise

>>529883549
And the mullet desu. That's a bit much even for me lol.

>>529883651
>>529884557
English's jankiness is almost exclusively due to the omnipresent French influence between the 11th and 15th centuries though right? I only know a little French. Obviously there's a ton of Latin influence too but that's also true of the romance languages.

>>529795187
who?

>>529891178
Watch Aftersun.

bunch of people are mad at luke dale does anyone know why

>>529891963
Beats me. This is the first time I'm hearing about it. Where is this anger coming from? Twitter, Tumblr?

>>529891963
Spill the chisme anon
Like whos mad and what they saying

>>529862360
Are you just using duolingo or anything else?

>>529883651
French pronunciation is ok but the language has so many exceptions to it's rules they may as well not exist

Am I the only one who only likes Henry in his default hairstyle? Every other option looks weird and ugly on him

>>529891963
He decided to unmod his unpaid twitch mods, that’s literally it. No one cares besides the usual group of schizophrenic teenage twitter fujos obsessed with canceling him because Luke blocked that one fujo in their clique a few months ago.
>>529895104
Default Henry is best Henry.

>>529895104
Default henry is the best only in cutscenes, he looks retarded in conversation scenes. Idk if its the animation, eyes, or subpar textures. Its mainly why i put facial hair on him. Tho i think ppl simply changed him just bc they can

>>529896020
What do these words mean

>>529892939
Just duolingo...

>>529898210
Duolingo is ok for practice and introducing new words but it doesn't teach you the important parts of the language
If you really want to learn you're gonna have to open a book

>>529891584
Too ugly

>>529891963
>bunch of people are mad
idk man seems like the russian and chinese fujos are still writing fat pregnant luke porn same as always

>>529895104
Same. Only the default Henry looks like Henry to me.

>>529911525
Based chinese and russian fujos
Western fujos have been gaslit by queer politics

>>529915737
Agreed
Who is that stranger and why is he looking at Hans like that?

>>529915737
>>529916190
I think you guys are just tired of minstrel cut/polish undercut+full beard combo bc yeah everyones henry looks like this.. almost
However some other combo are rather cute and still within henry vibe

>>529921025
No I've looked at every combination and the only one I'll accept is default. Even the hair that looks like KCD Henry's is unacceptable, Hans clearly made him get a nicer hairstyle between games

>>529896020
Yeah, the fujos harassing brilcrist into privatizing her account seem trustworthy to me.

ok people are really pissed off now. apparently luke is crashing out on his server. he's cute but he has a really fragile ego. i can find tweets of mad people if anyone is curious, i still don't know what made people so upset besides unmodding those people

>>529923470
Theatre kids
When will they learn

https://x.com/levanz10/status/1941094543417622579?s=46
testimony from one of the mods. i fear a luke dale google doc is in the works

>>529925324
Some of these bitches need to go outside
So do you
I'm gonna do the same

>>529923431
What the fuck?

>>529925324
luke has changed ever since the game becomes more popular. He had no stable jobs, of course he wants money lol that man is a real life hans capon, henry is a basically a yes man anyway

If I'm being honest this seems like the biggest nothing burger ever just being blown out of proportion by the usual suspects.
If we've reached the point where we need to talk about twitter twitch mod drama to keep this gen alive then it's time to let it die.

>>529925324
Also lets just say i already knew luke is gonna crash soon, i already had a bad feeling about him, not that I have proof or that i side with anyone, but i think that man is very egocentric and its obvious from the way he carries himself. I guess my discomfort watching him and seeing people simping for him was not for nothing

>>529916184
IIRC it’s just a weird clique of isterik fujos. They don’t care about queer politics, they just like drama and attention. Rather fitting for Istvan fans, I guess.

>>529923431
Why did they criticize luke...?

>>529926363
Yeah just a bunch of loud talentless people who got followers bc they yap and cornplating

>>529926363
The thing is people cant separate the vas and characters and the vas lean into it as well so its gonna be brought up

>>529927163
It's the same group that called him homophobic for tweeting about Katherine's romance during pride month

>>529927567
Damn my new blocklist

>>529927098
the reason they're Isterik fujos in the first place is because they hate Tom and Luke, weirdest parasocial shit I've ever seen

>>529928965
I get luke but why tom.. lmao

Tangentially related but sometimes i wonder if luke hates fat and pregnant bottom hans

>>529929140
he let Luke on his stream and talks to him when he's in chat, he picked the Theresa sweetheart option during his playhrough so he's queerbaiting, and he's "cishet yt man" who will "use lgbt fans for his own benefit"

>>529931403
Damn let that boomer alone istg

>>529930903
For his sanity I hope he doesn't know

>>529931403
I hope he goes for Katerina at the end that would be funny

>>529932145
>>529931403
*leave
I need to sleep bye

>>529932452
He said he was interested in staying faithful to Theresa. I wonder if that will change?

>>529933430
Good i need the theresa haters seethe

>>529933430
It would dunk on the fujos and the straights. It would be great

>>529932452
>>529933430
I'm a hansryfag but anything that pisses the fujos off would be good at this point

ITT: Drama Queen General

People really need to pay less attention to what a small handful of terminally online nuts are saying at any given moment. This shit is less than a nothingburger.

Post your henry

>>529935347
Naked and angry, of course.

>>529895104
I can sort of accept long hair + clean shaven Henry, but he looks a bit too noble for his KCD2 status.

>>529817995
>>529819772
The range of emotions his face goes through is really impressive, too.

>>529938342
Show us how close his hand got to Hans' ass

>>529935114
agreed
>>529935347

>>529938547
I'll do it, give me a sec

>>529938547
>>529942207
The lighting in that scene is truly awful below the waist, I did what I could

>>529943574
One hand on his shoulder, one hand grabbing the noble arse. Henry was instinctively ready and willing.

>>529943574
Heh, bros first instinct really was to grab his lord's ass

>>529945358
What can you say? Henry loves bottoms.
https://youtu.be/Gq56nQAhIbg?si=ajHBiDYku24bGp4t&t=3374

>>529943574
thank you for the screengrabs

>>529947662

https://x.com/WarhorseStudios/status/1941151619540021402

Warhorse’s adventures in China.

>>529955757
Who is the guy on the right because that ain't Henry

>>529958081
Alt beard and hair styles are one hell of a drug.

>>529935347
Henry why are you crouched like that? And what infernal contraption are you holding?

>>529958081
It's hard capturing his likeness, I guess.

>>529412274
why

where did everyone go?

>>529980620
lurking until the latest retarded drama blows over

>>529936252
Henrys speaking facts bc that frankly was a dumb trope

>>529966563
Hes just being stupid and wanted to annoy his lord

yeah it's over for us

>>529988474
no new players visiting this gen and its a single player game
Hoping the news for next dlc will break soon. Its july already

Guys old casting call was unearthed...
Hans callousness/assholery is because hes nervous and his bravado was just self protection and coping mechanism is canon

>>530000520
>hans was meant to be shorter
>canonically thinner than henry
>canonically looking younger than henry
>he was meant to he nervous guy
>canonically kind and good
>morally ambiguous henry shaped by players choice means dark henry is within canon possibility
>20 is their canon ages

>>530000520
>slightly generic
Kek. And Hans being an adorable waifu is the least shocking development ever.

>>529935347

>>530000520
>>530000986
“Hansry is pedophilia” chud crowd in absolute shambles.

>>530000986
Hans being Henry’s moral compass is also canon.

>Tom just wants to play farkle and blacksmith in his playthrough
He just like me fr...

DOUBLE DOUBLE, TOIL AND TROUBLE
anyways where the fuck can i get the bane recipe, aranka doesn't sell it anymore

>>530011713
Don't you automatically get the recipe of a potion when you brew it successfully?

>>530012308
oh is that so? i'll do that then

>>530012563
Was I right? I know it isn't "appropriate" if you're a really hardcore roleplayer but I'm pretty selective with the things I actually care about pertaining to rp so stuff like that doesn't bother me.

>>530013728
i'll get back to you on that, i got sidetracked and now i am swindling crossbowmen due to being able to slow time

>>530013897
>now i am swindling crossbowmen due to being able to slow time
Based.

>>530013728
You indeed get the recipe automatically if you manage to brew it once. I got several recipes that way.

I'm not a huge Mutt fanboy (I'm actually a cat man myself) but if you eat the Mutt soup, you should get poisoned and instantly die.

Here me out: Hmuttry

>>530017110
Look I want the general to stay alive as much as the next guy but...

This is by far my favorite Godwin moment. Even though I'm a Godless heathen, I really appreciate how sincerely pious a lot of characters are portrayed as being.

>>530013728
You can pretend it's just Henry suddenly remembering the recipes he already knew from the first game

>>530017825
Awww so cute
I need to rape him

>>530018314
do fujoshis really

>>530017925
>Istvan thinks hell isn't real and religion is just a tool to control the masses
Based?

>>530018435
True or not, he certainly got confirmation at the end of the first act. :)

Anyway its imteresting that henry taunted erik when all erik did was following orders i think deep down henry lusted blood desu but he needs justification

>hans being an pompous ass but soft underneath
>henry being a goofball but bloodlust underneath

Kino

>>530019004
>all erik did was following orders
Didn't work at Nuremberg and doesn't work for Erik. Sorry!

>>530017925
Its one of the highlight for me but mostly bc its funny

>>530019349
I agree it's very funny, especially how he matches his phrasing, but I also get the impression Godwin really means it. He loves Sam just as much as God does even if Sam is a Jew. He cares just as much about his soul as he does Henry's.

>>530019004
I can cut Erik some slack because he was groomed from a young age but even if you're a grooming victim at some point you start being responsible of your own actions

It’s been many months now and I still can’t believe Hansry became canon. Modern gaming was saved. Call that a Triumph of the Will.

DLC proposal: zombies attack

Okay sorry for xitter drama but i found the real reason why people are mad at luke
Its bc he rejected the mods advice about holding a pride stream kek

>>530020725
I forget what it's called but I'm actually kind of excited for that upcoming zombie game set in the (I believe) late 14th or early 15th century. I hate zombies generally and think they're stale and boring but that's a cool take on the genre. As far as KCD goes I would absolutely love a folklore/Witcher/paranormal DLC. There's a LOT of potential in the spooky, dark forests on the edges of the map(s). The game's realistic lighting is begging for a horror treatment. There's a reason everyone adores that deranged knight in the mine quest.

>>530020991
What would a pride stream even entail? Stream while he plays one of those shitty gay dating sims from itchio?

>>530021275
I dont even know i guess just to show support
Anyway thats why people are mad luke even mentioned katherine
The fandom is kinda insane desu it attracts cliquey autistic women

>>530020725
>>530021237
>kcd with zombies
A Korean studio is already on it, but gameplay looks kinda ass desu

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HeGMGD6e5gE&pp=ygUTZ29kIHNhdmUgYmlybWluZ2hhbQ%3D%3D

>>530021524
>show support
He literally did a gay sex scene in the most high profile project he's ever been involved in. What more do these fucking fujos want?

>>530021627
I was thinking about Blight: Survival actually. Looks much better imo.

DLC proposal: zombies defend???

>>530020991
>ugly dykes starting drama over literally nothing, news at 11
Was hoping for a Luke nudes leak or proof of him sexting minors t b h

battle music proposal: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VuJJGJDY3OE

>>530019147
>scene in kcd3 where hans finds henry after a battle and henry is just cleaving at erik's mangled corpse

>>530020991
it's kind of stupid he rejected the idea because he wanted to keep his streams 'apolitical' when the culture war chuds want him dead for being gay for pay anyway

>>530021835
Oh that looks amazing

>>530020991
Assuming that was a private conversation between Luke and the mods, how did it leak on twitter in the first place? Did the mods ran off to cry to their followers as soon as he said no? If so that's super unprofessional and he was right to sack them

>>530020991
To be real, I don’t care. This and the mod shit is normal for twitch streamers, the only reason it’s getting attention is because of the mods who wanted revenge for being unmodded. Honestly I just hope all this blows over or he says fuck it and never interacts with the community again because all the fujos harassing him and saying they want him to kill himself over this are taking it way too far.

>>530026101
it was a private conversation between Luke and the mods that happened almost a month ago, like two days ago Luke said he was unmodding mods who were unpaid volunteers to downsize, so the unpaid volunteers got mad and leaked every single questionable thing he’s ever said or done now that it benefits them

>>530024291
Tbf "queer people" a lot if them are autistic chronically online people who are unpredictable, doing such stream would just attract more crazy people who can never be satisfied

>>530026101
>>530026218
Im tbe anon who brought it up and agreed

>>530024128
Source????

Ngl yall asking for legit zombies just want a zombie game made by warhorse, not kcd

>>530026882
the only thing that i want is theresmutt

>>530026949
What about....
Im not gonna say it

>>530026882
You know that theory about how zombies and vampires popularity cycles in media every few years? Zombies are already out, we're in a global recession and vampires are in again.

What I'm trying to say is: consider vampire hunter Henry

>>530026218
He can just interact with the Czech community IRL, there’s way less drama there. I’m guessing there are some hilarious conversations happening at Warhorse currently.
>Tobi: Guys, you won’t believe what those fucking Americans are freaking out over now.

>>530027416
>vampire hunter Henry
Vampire/witch/cryptid/Czech folklore Hans and Henry buddy cop drama would be my dream DLC.

>>530027203
say it you coward

>>530027716
they tried to cancel tobi on twitter too awhile ago so he probably just thinks it’s funny

I need a mod that makes every fight use this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XeQryt_NU2Y

>>530026683
https://x.com/poloo6972/status/1918456559761539186

>>530028834
Nah you know what im gonna say

>>530030938
Thanks brah

HANSRY MATING PRESS

>>530027203
>>530032260
I know what you were about to say and you're disgusting, mutt would never do that to hans. the only logical option is a stray dog at erik's or a bandit's command.

I went back playing kcd1 its crazy how i could kill the enemies even during prologue in hardcore mode when I avoided them during my first playthrough

>>530036146
Everyday we stray away further from god
At this point just throw any heinous kink at hans

>>530033302
God, imagine being Henry.

>>530028361
this and Hans at the gallows are the most kino scenes in history
>>530036453
enemies in KCD1 circle me too much for me to survive an encounter with more than 2 of them

>>530037542
watersports

>>530044349
That's a normal kink everyone likes that

>>530044349

Bring back bartoschposting its better than dogfucking and watersports

>>530046117
Getting pissed on is hot as long as it's not in the mouth

What completely sane posts, pls warhorse just announce the forge DLC

>>530046117
Absolutely not, I can handle fat and pregnant, piss, dog fucking, incest, but the second you faggots start Bartoschposting I'm out of here and will never bump these threads ever again

>>530046335
Henry making his territory

>>530047165
Come back here we can go back to staple fat and pregnant hans

>>530047304
You get it

>>530047304
>>530047705
based

old script for the epilogue in dev notes if you romance Hans

>>530049373
Brutal Martin

>>530050262
Dad just knows things end badly if you fuck your lord.

>you now remember the Prague skit where Hans complains to Radzig about Henry bringing his sword to their bed

>>530049373
I like this better..... i wanna disappoint martin
Fuck warhorse

>>530049373
These dev notes are fascinating. Like this part where talking to Hans is literally saving Henry’s life.
>During the journey, Hans talks to Henry (chat), and Henry has to respond — this keeps him conscious and moving forward. If the player doesn’t respond, Hans starts to panic and tries even harder. If the player still doesn’t reply, Henry dies. We’d like to link this death to specific points in the cutscene, which would have two possible outcomes: either Henry regains consciousness and the cutscene ends, or he doesn't, and someone kills him in the scene.

>>530050801
Didn't end that badly
>>530051021
Why's it so skinny?

>>530052148

>FIFTH DEATH (Lays down with his parents and dies)

>Hans is guiding Henry. In front of them lie the dead bodies of his parents.
>It’s his mother and father — and there’s a second Henry (the player sees himself standing over the bodies).

>Henry and Hans walk toward the bodies — this is a sanity check point: a chat with Hans.
>Hans’ real voice is speaking over Henry’s illusion.
>If the player fails the check (stops responding), Jindra says, “I’ll stay here,” and Hans panics.

>Henry looks down beneath a large linden tree, where his parents’ bodies lie. (Limited camera movement or a fixed viewpoint here.)

>Fail outcome:
>Henry kneels down next to his parents and dies.

>Success outcome:
>Hans manages to talk him out of it, Henry doesn’t lie down, Hans says he sees something — the light of the herbalist’s house.
>Note: Phrase this more as a question — e.g., “Can you see the light?”

>You walk toward the light together, and a cutscene at the herbalist begins (fade out).

>A glowing light appears — as Jessee wanted — focus on it briefly, and then Henry collapses (not dead, just passed out).

>>530053592
Well, Ma and Radzig couldn’t stay together.

>>530053790
They were definitely fucking in secret

>>530053598
Everything sucks this was better also myb this is just me but i feel like there should be more happening in intro before ambush desu it feels so abrupt

>>530052148
>>530053598
I KNEEL czech fujo writers

>>530053598
And this is the best—the writers explain in detail Hans’ mindset at the beginning of KCD2. Apparently one of the reasons why he’s so desperate to prove himself is so he can take care of Henry and give him a comfortable life.
1) Hans is under huge pressure — he’s just received his first “real knightly assignment”, and he’s determined not to fuck it up. He wants to shut Hanush up and prove, to himself and everyone around him, that he’s grown up and can handle all the noble matters.
>We could even flip the roles a bit here — Henry notices that “Audentes fortuna iuvat” are the first words Hans has spoken all morning. Hans then admits he’s nervous — because of point 1 above.
>Henry could try to calm him down with something like: "Come on, we’re just riding to a castle, delivering a message, and heading back. It’s not rocket science."
>Hans would then open up and explain why this means so much and why he’s so tense.

2) If Hans proves himself, Hanush will have to hand over the estates and end the guardianship (at least, that’s how Hans’ interprets it) — and if Hans does well and gets to finally manage his vast lands like a real noble, then his bodyguard and friend — Henry — will have a blessed life under his care.
>But if he fails, Henry will be sent back to dig ditches, and Hans will stay a powerless, legally incapacitated child.
>So Henry, you need to try really fucking hard, because Hans’ future well-being equals your own well-being. Reminding Henry that he’s still, at heart, a peasant (despite Radzig’s blood) could add a nice personal sting — make him and the player feel that Henry has skin in the game. He needs to put in real effort if he doesn’t want to go back to the spade.

>>530053598
And this is the best—the writers explain in detail Hans’ mindset at the beginning of KCD2. Apparently one of the reasons why he’s so desperate to prove himself is so he can take care of Henry and give him a comfortable life.
>1) Hans is under huge pressure — he’s just received his first “real knightly assignment”, and he’s determined not to fuck it up. He wants to shut Hanush up and prove, to himself and everyone around him, that he’s grown up and can handle all the noble matters.
>We could even flip the roles a bit here — Henry notices that “Audentes fortuna iuvat” are the first words Hans has spoken all morning. Hans then admits he’s nervous — because of point 1 above.
>Henry could try to calm him down with something like: "Come on, we’re just riding to a castle, delivering a message, and heading back. It’s not rocket science."
>Hans would then open up and explain why this means so much and why he’s so tense.

>2) If Hans proves himself, Hanush will have to hand over the estates and end the guardianship (at least, that’s how Hans’ interprets it) — and if Hans does well and gets to finally manage his vast lands like a real noble, then his bodyguard and friend — Henry — will have a blessed life under his care.
>But if he fails, Henry will be sent back to dig ditches, and Hans will stay a powerless, legally incapacitated child.
>So Henry, you need to try really fucking hard, because Hans’ future well-being equals your own well-being. Reminding Henry that he’s still, at heart, a peasant (despite Radzig’s blood) could add a nice personal sting — make him and the player feel that Henry has skin in the game. He needs to put in real effort if he doesn’t want to go back to the spade.

>>530056486
Heh i would guess he would buy henry nobility i already have that hc myself that he would.help him if he wants to

Which leads me to think ive always find it odd that somehow i rarely seen hc where theyre both nobles, not that i look hard at the fandom, Its either cottagecore or henry remains his squire... makes me wonder since in kcd2 turns out you can buy a nobility. I think if hans truly cares about henry he would do everything to elevate his status. He already talked about giving him lands and a forge anyway

>>530056486
Hans being nervous and under a lot of pressure to prove that he's capable hits harder when you remember that every NPC in Rattay openly shits on him if you ask them about Hanush and Hans

I have to add.. i love cottagecore hansry but i think henry staying his page is rather cruel, if henry is knighted, is he automatically a noble? Is it 2 in 1 deal?

>>530056486
>This gets glossed over in a single line — but it’s MASSIVELY IMPORTANT. If Sir Bergow changes sides, there’s a real chance peace could return, and the war could finally end.
>We need to sell this moment — hard.
Players should feel like this mission isn’t just some errand run —it’s a huge fucking deal.
>Hans could say something like: "Henry, fortune’s smiled on us and handed us a truly vital task..."

>The issue with Hanush and Hans’ “inheritance” is a vast topic, but critical for Hans character. It should come up more often in dialogue, to show his position and inner conflict.
>It doesn’t need to be fully explained in the cutscene — a short reference is enough to hint at it — but Henry should be able to ask about it later in camp:
>Henry: “My lord, earlier you said you wanted to shut Hanush up and finally claim your castle... what did you mean by that?”
>This could lead to a deeper conversation — revealing how both Henry and Hans lost their parents, and how it scarred them/fucked them both up in different ways.
>The dialogue might end with something like: “See? I want revenge and justice, you want recognition and justice… for our parents.”

>We need to portray Hans as someone you like on a personal level, because of his one of a kind personality, his drive to accomplish something etc. When the quest to save his life comes up and later we end up having a massive row — I want it to actually hit me emotionally. I want to get what Hans’ issue is and what’s behind the argument, so I can relate to why he rage quits…. Because in a way, he and Henry are really similar — they both want to get shit done because it matters. Their only issue here is that neither quite understands the other’s particular borderline obsession, namely revenge and proving himself respectively.

>>530056778
He couldn't, but he could still give him a good life as a favored bodyguard/kept service top

>>530059584
TL note: “someone you like on the personal level” can also be translated as “someone you love”. Czechs have two common verbs for “to love”, with one meaning simply to love and other being reserved for passionate love declarations, not unlike Spanish and its “te quiero/te amo” dichotomy. This is the former.

>>530059939
So 0 agency, hans wouldnt do that

>>530056486
Ngl this is kinda funny bc this implies henry saved hans bc hes a gold digger

Hans’ hidden Italian skills semi-confirmed, I guess? He has a different emotional reaction to Henry saying the flirt wrong and right.
>Henry fucks up the phrase
>Hans (baffled): “What are you blabbering about?”

>Henry pronounces everything right
>Hans (amused): Nice. What does it mean?

>>530063035
cute but I mean I can tell when someone fucks something up in a language I don't understand

>>530063035
>beauty talk
Kek
Im sad i didnt get to experience this convo :(
If he understand italian its probably not to the extent of godwin does

>>530062184
To be fair, the notes then elaborate that Henry mainly loves him for his personality, but it is nice to remember that there are Henry’s interests in play too and they’re both aware of it.

>>530063553
Yeah sometimes its just a fact of life
Tho its interesting, it def rules out henry settling down in the middle of nowhere
bye bye cottagecore and fat and pregnant hans?

>>530061440
He wouldn't have a choice. Being a (minor, even) lord didn't let you do whatever you wanted

>>530063918
This is the very beginning of the game, so his priorities may have changed by the end of it. The return to Theresa ending would be flat out impossible if Henry wasn’t willing to lower his newfound standards at least a little bit.

>>530063918
Stop trying to antagonize me into replying to defend my fat and pregnant Hans agenda

Trosky confirmed for the point where they start thinking of each other as a potential couple. In Czech “partner” without any adjective (like “business partner”) pretty much always means a romantic relationship.
>Translation note:
>This is the sequence where they bond as a couple/pair of partners.

>>530065952
I think that anon meant that Henry would have zero agency in this situation. That’s a faulty logic, though, because in medieval times a peasant could only have agency if he found himself an unexpectedly high position near some lord. A normal blacksmith couldn’t even move to a different village without the nobles’ permission. Being Hans’s service top slash captain of the guard would probably make Henry the most powerful blacksmith’s son in the kingdom.

I adjusted the face of cheating peasant at the inn, now that shitstain either runs away at my mere sight or worse interputs whatever im doing and starts fight. Is putting him out of his misery is the only solution?

>>530076851
You should have cheated too and beaten him at his own game.

>>530078727
I took his set dice and 900 coins from his pocket and went on my merry way. He gave impression of a beatable schmuck despite all his luck.

>>530056486
Providing for Henry is indeed Hans’s love language, who knew. He’s genuinely a knight in shining armor in the making, just wanting to use his resources to care about others.

>>530068156
>You're the closest friend I have left
Henry confirmed to be closer to Hans than he is to Mattias, Fritz, Matthew, Johanka, and Theresa

>>530053790
>>530053860
Was Ma cheating on Martin or did Radzig just force Martin to marry her? Also it's super weird she doesn't even get a name, warhorse hates women confirmed

>>530091640
Didn't you play the game? Radzig arranged it
Nothing says they stopped fucking after, but nothing says they didn't either

>>530089392
Even though they're the only friends he's ever talked about
Curious
Was he too shy to say he's the closest friend he's ever had?

>>530092812
I forgor

Fanart anons, mpreg anons... where are you

>>530106713
Fanart anon here.

>>530107863
Wow this one is crazy

>>530089392
>>530093196
Maybe he meant in trosky
I found that line odd as well

>>530108783
Here's their page.
https://xcancel.com/azul_riley/status/1941554362746274047#m

>>530068156
Youre reading too much into it
Of course, thats the start of their romance route but ppl can imagine whichever point where they started to think "oh shit hes the one" or whichever point they had lust but repressed it

>>530106713
Drawing and writing I hope
>>530109706
For me it's the rattay baths

>>530109813
the bath quest is kino

I need KCD3
Dreamed of surprise release

I need to sleep.and wakeup on december

>>530121840
KCD3 only exists in fanfiction

>>530122872
I hope not.... i want to play
I hope forge dlc has a meaty story though. Prebyslavitz dlc was just a regular town building.

My favorite thing about Tom's streams has been how hostile he is towards just about every NPC. Like they're all just obstacles in his way. He got legitimately pissed at this one lady for using loaded dice and would not stop talking about it lmao. I'm glad he's embraced save scumming. It's the only way he might someday finish the game.

>>530130791
I’m a chronic save scummer and I hate it. My perfectionism won’t allow me to play with failed quests or bad rep, so I always lose hours and hours of progress over trivial shit.

>>530132998
Dude same and I do it with zero shame. I like experimenting with different choices in quests but I refuse to live with the sometimes unintended consequences (as cool and interesting and they may be in their own right). I just want my Henry to be happy and righteous man...we've been through so much together...

>>530132998
i'm the exact opposite. i habitually hoard savior schnapps and never sleep so if i eat shit on a quest i'm usually sent back 4 hours of playtime

>>530133651
Idk I almost feel like you should just live with eating shit on a quest if you're going to play this way though. You have my respect; I could never do it. There's no right way to play the game, all power to you.

>>530134269
by eat shit i absolutely mean game over, lol. i generally like my first playthrough of an rpg to be unfiltered so if i pick an option that fucks me over in the long run that's just what i stick with. second and third playthroughs are free game though, i'll savescum like a son of a bitch at that point

Peter of Pisek is a fucking bitch in this game. Not only did he help Von Bergow escape, only for it to comically backfire on him (thanks based Hynek), he whinged and moaned about a couple trebuchet hits. "They destroyed muh poverty castle". Fake, opportunist, Wenceslas supporter. Dude your brother Christian is literally going to be the new mint master most likely. Stop being a fag.

>>530132998
Me too but usually only for first playthroigh second playthrough you should be able to be more relaxed

However the mill maid pisses me off to no end i would gladly kill her everytime and reloaded and ignore her. I just dont likr how the game offers no option to go look for her and instead i have to have high check, pay fine, or fight the and NPC guards are almost always OP

>>530136126
Is it confirmed in game he freed him? Its only speculation so far. I think its fair though wars arent pretty, i have hard time truly disliking characters in this game i feel like everyone has a point except istvan and brabant mostly bc theyre grating.. and osina

Anyway now i wonder why youre allowed to punch annoying characters like osina but other times you cant...

I'm starting to think, based on his obvious expertise expressed in many dialogue options in KCD2, Henry really was a master blacksmith at least in terms of knowledge. He was just that much of a spoiled, lazy, mama's boy at the beginning of the first game. That's hilarious if you think of it that way. Very much a Luke Skywalker, "tosche station to pick up some power converters", type introduction to Henry.

Who else gets the bug hans being topless during hunger and despair i thought it was intended until he attended the mass still not wearing a shirt and i was like.. dude.... then i reloaded to see another decision and hes wearing his slutty armor again? Which one is the bug lmao

>>530137105
>only speculation so far
It is speculation on my part as well but it's a theory I believe very strongly unless proven otherwise. I even decided just playing the game, before seeing any online discussion. The conversation with Zizka afterwards, Henry's incredulity at the explanation Zizka provides, and the weird, tense power dynamic between Zizka and Pisek all sort of lead me to that conclusion. Don't get me wrong, I don't blame Peter for wanting to preserve his property because even a restored Wenceslas likely isn't footing the bill for his damages and he has his subjects to ultimately be concerned for, but big picture freeing Von Bergow was probably a pretty short sighted move. I don't think he had faith in Jobst to actually muster an army and come to their aid.

>>530137494
Damn it never occurred to me. I feel like he was always shirtless in hunger and despair (could be wrong, I know I've at least seen it for sure) but I've never seen him with his shirt off during the mass.

>>530137183
it doesnt mean he has no knowledge its pretty much just like hans at the first game shown drinking, womanizing, bored easily, seemingly unrealiable but at kcd2 he showed impressive knowledge dissecting nebakov castle

>>530137596
Its definitely plausible, more signs leading to kcd3.

>I don't think he had faith in Jobst to actually muster an army and come to their aid
I mean its fair kek the aid didnt come until henry went out to send the message

>>530137850
>it doesnt mean he has no knowledge
I totally get that. Henry at the start of the game comes across as a begrudging apprentice more into swordplay and adventuring as well as boozing in the tavern with his good for nothing friends. It's just cool to see how much knowledge he actually retained even if his heart wasn't into it at the time. You're right that Hans actually shows a similar, almost parallel level of competence despite his youthful disinterest demonstrated in the first game. Just good writing all around.

>>530134749
Why is Zizka a Bull?

>>530138812
True true parallel kino
Also hans chose to be considerate toward von bergow. Hes really chivalrous at heart, his problem was just he lacks real life experience and no one trusted him enough... meanwhile henrys subsconscious wanted to kill von bergow kek though its just one time thingy and never brought up again would be kino if it was expanded more

I can't speak on Euro lakes but American lake swimming sucks ass. Slimy moss and algae underfoot with fish nibbling at you the whole time. I'm a Floridian and I prefer ocean swimming infinitely more.

>>530137596
Peter also has another reason for not going along with Zizka, and that’s tradition. Both Peter and Otto are old-school aristocracy, who grew up in a world of certain rules where the noble status was unassailable and low-ranked people knew their place. For them, Zizka, Hynek, Hans and Henry represent a new chaotic world where the lines between social classes become more blurry, a glorified yeoman (Zizka) can command armies and unseat kings, priests are getting into radical Protestant ideas, and a blacksmith’s son can be the right-hand man of a heir to the centuries old dynasty.

It’d make sense if Peter felt a certain class affinity with von Bergow that he can’t have with Zizka and his people.

>>530132998
>>530133651
hardcore mode saving systems cures you from space contstruct player syndrome, each of one's actions has it's weight reattached to it. the only thing you can't savescum is your own time.

>>530146116
Central Euro lakes tend to have fine silt at the bottom, coupled with algae and aquatic vegetation. Not very pleasant to walk on, but on the bright side you’re not stuck with a crust of salt all over your body once you leave the water.

>>530146384
Another very good point. Peter may well have felt more affinity towards Von Bergow compared to his new found, and largely imposed "allies".

>>530146481
>space construct player syndrome
Now youre just making up terms

>>530146705
Almost all of the public beaches here have showers available for that exact reason. Well, that and the sand.

>>530146481
this is why my kcd1 first playthrough is 300h
kcd2 is better at 160h

>>530039814
>this and Hans at the gallows are the most kino scenes in history
Agreed. It's insane how a game with a relatively low budget has managed to embarrass 99% of """AAA""" single player releases without even trying.

>>530138812
>>530137850
Your points about H&H’s remarkable competence despite their seeming laziness and irresponsibility at the beginning of the series make a lot of sense in light of what Warhorse wrote here >>530059584. They are very similar people who are hyper-focused on getting shit done when it matters. Their life at the beginning of the story basically kept this aspect of them locked away, either because they were coddled and nothing important was ever happening anyway (Henry), or because they were never given space to assert themselves in any meaningful way (Hans).

The in-game test quests are wild. Not sure what Warhorse is smoking, but it’s clearly some good shit.

Reddit dev note poster: “I mean, there's a whole test quest where Hans lost his sword and asks Henry to find it, which he can refuse and call him stupid and he will respond "I don't like you, milkman Hal", but if he accepts he will find Radzig giggling about it and saying he stole his sword then threw it over the walls. Henry will say "a senile old man can't throw a sword that far" and eventually Godwin will tell him to go put a sword on top of a church because it's God's word as it had suddenly fell from the sky and into his arse (which Hanush says is bs and that he was just drunk).”

>>530159394
Maybe drinking on the job is a good thing actually

>>530159394
Also, the Brushes with Death DLC has added a new test file titled bathDialog. It’s pretty funny.
>HENRY “Hi!”
>HANS: “Hello, Henry.”
>HENRY “I need you to help me with something…”
>HANS: “As you can see, I’m a bit busy at the moment.”
>HENRY “Oh well, guess it can’t be helped.”
>HANS: “Come for me tomorrow. I don’t think we’ll make it today— I’ve got a massage scheduled right after the bath.”

>DECISION 1: Letter
>HENRY “Bloody hell, Capon, we’ve got to deliver that letter!”

>DECISION 2: Fuck
>HENRY “Aye, looks like the only thing we can do now is fuck.”
>END DIALOGUE

There’s also writer text suggesting they have/had plans for Hans’ wedding events.
”After this scene, Žižka once again has his eye bandaged. If the player talks to him, they’ll learn that Devil struck his helmet, and splinters from the arrow flew through the visor into his eye. Whether it will heal is still uncertain. Žižka will otherwise function normally—he just has the bandage over his eye.”
”The plan is for the eye to heal for now, and for him to lose it later during Capon’s wedding.”

>>530161362
The Žižka eye torture is neverending

>>530160571
Given this is Czechia, the chances are that they’re both drunk and high at the same time.

>>530159394
Warhorse needs to take themselves not as seriously anymore... i need wacky sidequests like hans capon dlc in kcd2

>>530161362
Sigh im dreading the wedding expansion
I think they might not do kcd3 but expansion of the epilogue

>>530161612
The real jam zizka rolling in his grave

>>530161362
I don't want to play the fucking wedding
If they release a dlc about it and you have to go through with it with no option to kidnap/elope with Hans I'm unironically skipping and possibly uninstalling

>>530163531
They'll go through with the wedding but Jitka is getting cucked

>>530163531
Same i have high standard maybe i will go through it but with no romance hans
Ew

I wonder, does hans still tell about galehaut and lancelot story if you dont romance him?

>>530163909
No

>>530137494
Him being topless is a bug, as he is actually in his sleepwear. This bug occurs because by the time you talk to Zizka and finish the previous quest, Hans is already in bed and in his sleepwear. So when the next quest/cutscene loads (Hunger and Despair) he's still wearing his sleepwear. You can fix it by saving and reloading right there, then he'll be properly clothed. You can avoid the bug if you mash through dialogue with Zizka to advance to the next quest before Hans goes to bed.

>>530163909
Logically speaking he shouldn’t, since Henry never gave him a clear signal he might be interested. Hans does, however, babble something about two knights in his feverish delirium when he’s wounded at Bozhena’s.

>Luke averaging 1.1k viewers per stream
glad to see the nothingburger drama was in fact a nothingburger and didn't effect anything

>>530170061
There was some seething in chat but nobody gave a shit

>>530172030
I can only imagine how mad twitter must be about that

>>530172030
Do tell we love chisme time

>>530161362
>>530163531
Interesting. Maybe it's scrapped plans? Wedding dlc wouldn't really make sense because historically Hans gets married in 1404 after the king is saved in 1403. It would have to be a massive dlc too, since the wedding takes place in another region... I wonder what it's going to be.

>>530176212
Thank you for providing sense i dont wanna see hans getting married
Im too attached to impossible good endings after considerimg it

>>530161362
That fuck dialogue is extremely Czech. It’s so laconic.
>Aye, in that case we can just fuck.