Kisenosato Edition
>Banzuke:http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspx
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/
>Fight Schedule & Results:https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/
>Some sumo links and how to watch live:https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d
>Beya Youtube channels:>Futagoyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@futagoyama-sumofood
>Isegahamahttps://www.youtube.com/@isegahamabeya
>Kisehttps://www.youtube.com/@kisebeya
>Tatsunamihttps://www.youtube.com/@tatsunami-beya
>Tamanoihttps://www.youtube.com/@sumo-tamanoibeya
>Hidenoyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@hidenoyama
>Oshimahttps://www.youtube.com/@oshimabeya
>Minatohttps://www.youtube.com/@ๆน้จๅฑใฉใใใใใฃใณใใซ
>Shikoroyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@shikoroyamabeya
>Asakayamahttps://www.youtube.com/@ๆต
้ฆๅฑฑ้จๅฑๅ
ฌๅผใใฃใณใใซ
>Takasagohttps://www.youtube.com/@TAKASAGOSUMOTEAM้ซ็ ้จๅฑ
Previous thread:
>>232947
I am here for the good boy thread
https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202506060001822.html
Akio Toyoda, the chairman of Toyota Motor and apparently an important supporter of Hakuhou, has been announced as a candidate for president of International Sumo Federation. Nikkan seems to believe that he will try to expand sumo's global presence if elected.
The pieces are moving into place.
the childishness on display itt is truly laughable
are you literally six years old with this tantrum? lmao
imagine actually unironically getting emotionally angry because you think a thread on /xs/ was made too soon
How to improve Sumo with a new Association.
>Surround the area by an Octagon so no one gets hurt
>Change the clothes to shorts
>Entrances with modern rap songs
>Fighters don't need to be Stoic. Backflips and Fortnite celebrations allowed.
There, got the general public to follow Sumo. Easy.
Kusano Ozeki in one year from now.
Screencap this post.
You guys are such an embarrassment to us
I had a dream today I was browsing 4chan and somebody posted a webm of a that notoriously small sumo guy absolutely dunking on his opponent and then I replied "damn I love that little nigga like you wouldn't believe". The kicker is I don't even watch sumo, I've only seen a couple youtube highlights here and there. Is this a sign that I need to start watching?
>>234413Now is a great time to start watching. We have two new yokozuna who are young and (relatively) injury-free. They look poised to do even greater things than what they've already accomplished. There's also a fair amount of prospects who are coming into their own while the old guard is filtering out.
>>234413Damn I love all my little niggas like you wouldn't believe.
Danny
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>>234007Dan will make it before he does. Also LMAO when Dan destroys Daieisho, Wakatakakoga & Kirishitma's ozeki runs next 'sho and starts his own
>>234481Damn, he was born on the same day as my grandfather.
>>233878>็งใฎๅๅIs that his shikona???
>>234490https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO1Cs8UqMCw
Masuiyama beating Kitanofuji, Mienoumi, Chiyonofuji, Takanosato, Wajima
>Futagoyama sloppa consists of training, cooking, and eating
>Tatsunami sloppa consists of training, cooking, and eating
>Meanwhile Oshima is putting out this unfathomable kino
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqh_upgoVOc&ab_channel=%E5%A4%A7%E5%B3%B6%E9%83%A8%E5%B1%8B%E3%80%90%E5%85%AC%E5%BC%8F%E3%80%91%E3%83%81%E3%83%A3%E3%83%B3%E3%83%8D%E3%83%AB%E3%80%90SUMO%E3%80%91
>>234492Fuckin adorable, but as an ex lifeguard bits of that were hard to watch.
I can't stop thinking about that bintsuke oil in the pool as well. Massive water park so it doesn't really matter though.
>>234493>I'm Yokozuna so I get the unicorn floatie >:(Teru is fuckin great.
>>234494I bet it was the most majestic of all the floaties available.
kak
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>>234496>Finally I have collected all the rubber ducks in Japan>But at what cost?
>>234486Hakuho? More like HakuNIGGER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0gxl8IThDY
Someone uploaded an old special about the 1991 London koen.
>>234510Kuroho Dayum Sumo & Basketball Corporation
>>234514Apparently, they were all introduced under nicknames in place of their shikona?
>>234519I hope they bring this back.
>>234525it's a very long time ago
3
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>>234514this is not where I thought things would end up
4
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Takatouriki finds himself betting on the ponies. He wins his very first bet.
This is foreshadowing.
file
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i don't think i have ever read the lifting numbers of a rikishi and found them believable. it's always like 40% higher than believable
>>234531What, you're trying reverse psychology now?
Regardless, it turns out there's a video of this. You people who know how to count plates can tell me if it looks like 200 kg.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DFr6pY3zG3H/
>>234530>his very first bet.lol, that degenerate, it probably was even his first bet of the day.
>>234534Nippon tetsu, preasu understando
>>23453420+20+30+10+10+5+5
>>234519i think these were nicknames given by the westerners... wakanohana had none.
>>234537>i think these were nicknames given by the westernersYeah, it looks like those cards are from the British broadcast, because they're used here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6AfqCcALLc
I guess Channel 4 made them up, then?
>>234540More like "talked to the 90's version of Chris".
file
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>>234541>that's konishiki, aka the dump truck. i visited his beya once and frankly i wasn't impressed. he lacks the hinkaku required of a yokozuna. they tried to recruit me, i had top division skills but i don't take orders, i would have ended up punching the oyakata in the face
>>234541>the 90's version of Chrisaka Chris
>>234544Which one's Chris?
lmao, did Mita threw up at 23:55
https://youtu.be/YFPJvXUNKEA?t=1437
>>234545The one who clearly understands Japanese culture better.
mita
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>>234547reminiscent of the first running scene in rocky, mita is 100% devoted to success in sumo unlike nabatame who just wants to spend his life on masturbation and other self centered activities.
too bad mita is a manlet and will never be able to translate his devotion to a meaningfully high rank. he might be one of those guys who gets a basho or two at komusubi and puts up double digit losses there before fading away, but even that seems a bit too much to expect of him
I want fewer videos of rikishi eating slop and more videos of rikishi lifting
I wanna see Hoshoryu in a unicorn floatie.
>>234554I want more videos of rikishi playing video games.
chiyomaru is currently barely holding on at upper makushita
what's going on in his head? i mean he's 34 years old, does he hope to get *just* inside the salaried level for a year or two more? is it about acquiring elder stock?
what drives such a man
>>234562100% itโs about securing a share.
>>234563he already has more than a good enough history to qualify. he hasn't retired because he likes being a rishiki and doesn't want it to end.
and by that I mean he likes the infinite availability of free food
>>234562This
>>234565 and also to be a sort of active veteran voice in the stable. They need some young guys to step up or they're going to be out of Sekitori quite soon.
>>234565It usually isn't about the number of basho, it's about the availability of a kabu through whichever ichimon they belong to. If he needs the kabu of someone who ages out in 2026, he's not going anywhere until then.
>>234562It's entirely possible that he doesn't have any idea where he's going to earn a living after sumo. Sure, he might be hanging on for a kabu, but he might just as easily be hanging on until the supporters club finds him a job as a security guard. One thing about sumo that doesn't get the attention it ought to is the fact that a lot of these men (Chiyomaru included) join sumo instead of going to high school, and spend their entire adult lives as rikishi. If you're good enough to reach sekitori and escape chanko duty quickly, you don't even have the fallback skill of being a good chef for when your career ends. If they weren't wise enough to invest their salary smartly over the years, many of these men suddenly find themselves as middle-aged unskilled bums with rapidly dwindling savings accounts. I don't know about you, but I'd rather grind on in Makushita for a while longer than go out into the world unprepared.
>>234565Qualifying to get a share does not automatically mean you get one. There are only 105 of them and there are only a handful of them available at any given time. If he doesnโt have one lined up when he retires, heโs out of the sumo association with no other course back in.
Heโs in the Takasago ichimon and from the looks of it, thereโs maybe two or three available in the next few years. He could always secure a share outside the ichimon but thatโs a taller ask.
He probably has his supporters club doing their legwork to secure him funding for a share (if he hasnโt already) but until one comes up, heโs got to stay in the ring.
I was watching the Tochiozan retrospective on the Oyakta channel and when they started going through his old matches with him they only showed ones he lost. Thats was the whole show, he sat there for half an hour watching himself fail and the other oyakatas denigrated him for losing and he made up excuses and apologies.
>>234486still less mutt than am*ricans.
>>234574Disgusting. Where's the risk of permanent spinal injury? I bet you couldn't even get a concussion from hitting that tawara the wrong way. Get this pussy shit out of my sight.
>>234574Old ruins of ancient sumo...
How many knees were obliterated in that very sacred dohyo...
>>234582not as many; they had the hosting daimyo's retinue standing at attention and willing to stab anything that falls out of bounds with a spear
when they realized that this didn't present enough danger to the audience members as well, changes had to be made
>>234578Humiliation ritual
>>234588There are quite a lot of those in Japanese culture
1
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>>234578>>234588>I was watching the Tochiozan retrospective on the Oyakata channel and when they started going through his old matches with him they only showed ones he lost. >Humiliation ritualThey definitely didn't do that at all. It was an overview of matches important to him, selected by him. The losses are things like his first career bout, his first playoff loss, his first makuuchi playoff loss. They also show him winning his sandanme yusho, securing his promotion to juryo, and beating Hakuho and Kisenosato.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bqwzvhgV5A
Nothing like you described.
>>234581The spinal injuries don't come from the falls; they come from two 400lb muscular men hitting each other with their full force over and over.
>>234600>you won't get hurt if you fall face-first off a raised dohyo>honest
>>234601Stop moving and goalposts and making shit up at the same time. Show me a single instance of a rikishi faceplanting the floor when they go out. It doesn't happen because your instincts won't let it. Really low quality post from you honestly.
>>234602There's no room to faceplant the floor, you go straight into the crowd. You don't need a single instance, you'll see it a hundred times every basho. I don't know why you're defending such an obviously dangerous practice, that isn't even traditional. The dohyo was raised to provide better viewing angles for early TV cameras.
>>234602>It doesn't happen because your instincts won't let it.Do you think "instincts" are some magical force that bends the body away from harm
>>234602Your instincts are supposed to stop you from charging head-first at things. A large part of sumo training for newbies is teaching them to ignore their instincts and put themselves at risk.
>>234610Do you know who Hibikiryuu is?
>>234611The kid who didn't die from falling off the dohyo?
>>234611 was right, you do keep moving the goalposts.
>>234612I'm not the person you were talking to before. Stop thinking that you are always talking to one person.
I mentioned Hibikiryu in re
>instincts are some magical force that bends the body away from harmHe fell headfirst and died. Literally nothing about "instincts" makes it difficult or impossible to suffer a face-first injury.
Also, general spinal injuries have nothing to do with faceplanting. Contrary to your understanding, the spine actually descends all the way down one's back. When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>>234613>Literally nothing about "instincts" makes it difficult or impossible to suffer a face-first injury.Except for the distance you fall, retard.
> Contrary to your understandingMy understanding of what? Now who's thinking they're talking to one person?
>the impact will often cause a spinal injury.>often[Citation needed]
>terunofuji shitting on atami for always giving up on the belt
Thank fuck, maybe he can hammer some sense into his skull
>>234614>Except for the distance you fall, retard.What the fuck are you talking about?
>[Citation needed]Sorry, you're going to argue that falling from a platform onto your back will not often cause a spinal injury?
>>234618More time to fall means more time to brace yourself, you dumbass.
>you're going to argueThat's not how this works. YOU argued it, you back it up, sailor.
>>234603You sound gay and retarded. Go back to plebbit.
a
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>>234620What is the position you are trying to defend? Just say what it is in plain writing.
>>234623>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.No, no, little dumbass. This is the position YOU are trying to defend. Show me the data on a two foot fall onto a padded floor, or fuck right off.
Every dohyo fall according to redditors
>>234624Why are you arguing with me?
>>234624>padded floorFutagoyama is fat as fuck, but he doesn't count as sports padding like you'd see in say, trampolining. Neither do any of the other shimpan, or the spectators. Falling face-first onto someone's knee isn't going to do you any good.
>>234621>lost the argument>resorts to insultsEvery single time...
>>234626Because you've made wild claims with nothing to back it up.
>>234627Neither is falling face first onto an un-padded floor, but that's not what is around the dohyo.
>>234628>I'm not the person you were talking to before. Stop thinking that you are always talking to one person.
>>234629What was the wild claim? What is YOUR claim? What the fuck are you doing shitting up the thread?
>>234630Are you fucking retarded?
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.That is the claim I am protesting. If you didn't make that claim, fuck off. If you did, prove it or fuck off.
My only claim was that instincts protect the body from harm.
>>234631Yeah, because that really shows the floor quite well.
>>234632That's the point. Even if there was proper padding put down (there isn't, because the JSA is cheap and doesn't care about safety) its benefits would be negated by the fact that you literally can't see the floor around the dohyo due to all the people sitting around it. Those shimpan could reach out and touch the edge of the dohyo, they're so close. Any falls off the dohyo will not be a "two foot fall onto a padded floor", it'll be "right into a crowd of people". This is laughably dangerous and wouldn't pass a risk assessment in any other country or any other sport.
>>234633>literally can't see the floor around the dohyo due to all the people sitting around it.Uh huh... sure .... yup. Hey, have you tried this new site? https://www.reddit.com/ You might enjoy it.
>>234598>They definitely didn't do that at all.sure, but it would've been funny if they did
>>234632>My only claim was that instincts protect the body from harm.It *can* do that, but it does not necessarily do that. We know this because sometimes people die due to injuries. Do you accept that?
>>234636Duh. I fail to see it's relevance. Did you have more?
>>234636nta but list every rikishi that has died from injuries caused by falling off the dohyo
>>234634>everyone who disagrees with me is the reddit bogeymanYou're a child. Even in your chosen picture, there are people sitting right next to the dohyo. In every basho you've ever watched, rikishi fall into the crowd. Some, like Tobizaru, are well known for going right into the third and fourth row. This is clearly and pointlessly dangerous, and you don't have a leg to stand on in this argument. Are you a teenager, who still thinks he's invincible? Have you ever worked anywhere dangerous, like a factory or an oil rig? Anywhere like that has a list of safety regulations longer than your arm, and every single rule on there is written in blood. If you haven't ever seen a sumo wrestler hurt himself from falling badly off the dohyo, then you're a lucky newbie. You will if you watch for long enough, and if you've got an ounce of empathy you'll wish that someone had introduced some safety protocols before he fell.
>Some, like Tobizaru, are well known for going right into the third and fourth row.
Yeah, look at all the matches he's missed due to those nasty spinal injuries. Cry me a fucking river, faggot.
>if you've got an ounce of empathy
I don't.
>>234640Thanks for admitting you're an idiot sociopath. Everyone can safely ignore your opinion, because you're incapable of thinking like a normal human being.
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>often
Yeah to be honest I dont give a shit at all if people get injured
Normal human being lol
Your normal human beings are currently carrying on 3 seperate wars, mr morally superior
But sure, because you cried when Tobizaru got a boo-boo, you're the next Gandhi
>>234644Just stop. This would be sad enough if you were a 15 year old edgelord, and I suspect you're much older than that.
>>234646>oh no I cant refute anything he said and I look like a massive retarded hypocriteYou're so fucking high on your own farts
>>234646>lost the argument>resorts to insults
>>234639>>234641Sumo is a full contact combat sport. Multiple top-level rikishi have gone on record saying a rikishi must accept death every time they step on the dohyo. You have yet to actually show even a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard bout.
>>234652>a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard boutthis happened literally THIS BASHO
>>234649You're just insisting that it's fine for things to be dangerous, because nobody you're aware of has died or been crippled yet. This is such a ridiculous and naive position, especially if you look at how battered and chronically injured any veteran wrestler is, that it needs no refutation. You have no argument, you're just being unpleasant because it's the only way you know how to behave.
>>234652You're missing the point. Yes, sumo carries a lot of inherent risks that can't be removed without fundamentally changing how the sport works. That's no excuse for adding even more unnecessary risks, like raising the dohyo. This is a modern change that wasn't made with the best interest of the rikishi in mind. You have yet to make a single compelling argument for why the dohyo should be raised off the floor at all.
>>234654A non-athlete got a spinal injury in his leg?! STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES!!
>>234654They normally take the time to put robes on injured rikishi before carting them out?
>>234655Life is fatal. Should we ban that too?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyKjY3n8zqQ&t=188s
Or how about Tomokaze, who landed on his feet after falling from the dohyo, and who is legally disabled as a result of the injury? The doctors told him that they had considered amputation at first due to the severity of his condition.
>>234655>You're just insisting that it's fine for things to be dangerousIf they're undertaken voluntarily, which sumo is, then yes, it's perfectly fine.
>>234655If it was actually an unnecessary risk then you'd be able to prove that falling off the dohyo has a higher risk than normal competition, but all you can find are one rikishi every five years injured from a fall when the injury rate on the dohyo is much higher.
>>234656A JSA employee got seriously injured due to falling off the dohyo. This would be shocking in any other sports federation. In a sane world, he should be entitled to a sizeable amount of compensation. Because this is sumo, nothing will happen and nothing will change.
>>234661Still wrestling, last I checked. Although I'm starting to see a pattern here. It seems most rikishi have spines in their legs.
>>234664>This would be shocking in any other sports federationhttps://youtube.com/watch?v=PrYw3GQcrWc
>>234664It's a leg injury. They'll pay for it to be repaired and he'll get back to what he was doing. Why the fuck would anything change?
>>234662No, it isn't fine. There are lots of dangerous sports, like boxing and MMA, but those sports still have a responsibility to ensure that the athletes don't have to take unnecessary risks. That's why fights are often stopped before their conclusion by judges concerned about safety, like for eyebrow gashes.
>>234663You're STILL missing the point. There's no good reason for it to be raised at all. It shouldn't be one rikishi every five years, it should be no rikishi ever getting injured as a direct result of falling off an elevated platform, because there shouldn't be an elevated platform to fall off.
>>234667>why should anything changeBecause it's a completely preventable injury, and steps should be taken to try and ensure it doesn't happen again.
>>234664Yes, we know, the western world is obsessed with suing for millions over fucking everything.
>>234669Yes, in the civilised world it's understood that if you're injured in the workplace as a result of your employer not taking proper safety precautions, you deserve some compensation for it.
>>234668Then you'll complain about rikishi, judges, and spectators getting more frequently injured from rikishi falling onto them and whine about something else like setting up a barrier around the dohyo. Then you'll whine about rikishi getting injured running into the barrier. Shit happens in any sport, even the non-contact ones, you cannot run around trying to get rid of every freak injury because that results in killing the sport.
>>234668The boxing ring is also raised off the ground. Im surprised someone as morally concerned as you didnt know that. Surely you werent just saying anything you could think of that might support your argument?
>>234611A textbook example of a fat retard who got into sumo because it was daycare for his stupid ass. Go ahead, downvote me, I've seen the video and holy fuck what a stupid retard.
>>234665>It seems most rikishi have spines in their legs.>You have yet to actually show even a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard bout
>>234671The compensation is supposed to be reasonable. In the west people get a papercut and immediately try to take the company for all they're worth.
>>234668Why didnt boxing take steps to prevent horrible tragedies like this from repeating themselves? Where were the special safety refs?
https://www.dazn.com/en-US/news/boxing/ben-whittakers-fight-ends-in-chaos-suffers-injury-after-falling-out-of-the-ring/1h9u2ewn5w4xz1c5miucpoogpk
>>234675>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.>OFTEN
>>234664>This would be shocking in any other sports federation.NHL tells its officials to stop being whiny bitches when they get injured. They regularly eat punches to the face when NHL players are getting into scrums, and a few years ago a player ran into an official hitting the back of his neck and the NHL threw out what's supposed to be an automatic suspension.
>>234672Yes, I think the dohyo should be level with the floor, surrounded by padding thick enough to absorb the massive impacts, and that spectators and judges shouldn't ever be close enough to be fallen on. None of this is unreasonable.
>>234673A boxing ring has ropes around it to stop men from being beaten back and falling off. The objective of a boxing match isn't to push the other man out of the ring, either. It could be better, I agree. MMA makes it impossible to fall out of the ring, which is a huge improvement, albeit with the tradeoff of making it harder for paramedics to get in to attend to injured fighters. Boxing certainly does better than sumo as far as health and safety goes, however, which is an embarrassingly low bar to clear.
>>234677I don't know. I think they should take steps to stop that from happening again.
>>234679Everyone involved in conduct like that should be prosecuted. What a terrible and unprofessional organisation - thanks for letting me know so I can avoid it.
>>234681I think you should switch to watching synchronized swimming, little buddy.
>>234680> None of this is unreasonable.
>>234682Why? Most sports don't accept their athletes acting like thugs. Hell, even sumo draws the line at that.
>>234684What the fuck are you blabbering about
This is like talking to a jew
Slimy
>>234680Just so you know since you seem unaware: spectators CHOOSE to be that close to the ring.
>>234678Sorry, what don't you understand? How often do you see rikishi fall off the dohyou onto their backs? OFTEN, *when* that happens, there is a spinal injury. Not "often, rikishi fall off the dohyou and injure their spines". This fact is not in question, and what I wrote was not ambiguous.
>>234687Okay, show me these rikishi.
This faggot has a really weird definition of "spinal injury".
>>234685The post I was originally responding to was describing brutal and thuggish conduct by the athletes and the officials. I said that such a thing is unusual and not tolerated in other sports. I'm sorry you cant follow a conversation.
>>234686I'm sure people would choose to sit closer to a football match or a tennis match if they could, but that would be distracting and dangerous so they aren't allowed to.
>>234690Hyperbolic British faggotry on full display.
>>234691>losing an argument on full display
>>234688Give me Kintamayama's archive and I will.
>>234690We're talking to teenagers and internet tough guys. I'm not sure there's any point in continuing.
>>234692>What is basketball
>>234694Basketball? That game where the spectators are allowed to sit under the hoop for a better view?
>>234690>I'm sure people would choose to sit closer to a football match or a tennis match if they couldHEY GET BACK HERE WITH THOSE GOALPOSTS
I still want to know how you morally justify war when you're losing your mind over a guy falling three feet
All the safety regulations in the world arent stopping Israeli bombs
>>234693>Give me Kintamayama's archive and I willSo your claim was made without evidence?
>>234698Slightly over 2 ft.
>>234698Who's been trying to morally justify war? Do you think that it's Trump and Netanyahu in this thread arguing about sumo?
>>234699I saw something happen. I don't have a copy of what I saw because of the NHK copyright bullshit. I guess every basho from 2011-2020 didn't happen because they aren't available for viewing; I can't prove that they happened.
>>234702Jason's channel is mostly complete on the Internet Archive. He ought to have most of the fights you're thinking of.
>>234702>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.>I can't prove that they happened.Thank you.
>>234704>>234687you should kill yourself
>>234701You claim to have a moral concern because people are being injured unnecessarily.
Yeah it sure would be a stretch to relate that to war somehow...
And what if you somehow noticed that the safety regs you love to fellate are written and enforced by the same governments engaged in war?
No, you're right. Why would you care if an Iranian child gets killed by a missile when Tobizaru might twist his ankle? I mean, gotta have your priorities straight. Especially when you use your inflated sense of moral superiority to try to brow beat people into supporting silly rule changes. Why? To prevent injury? Right? Yes, without Trump or Netanyahu in the room it just isnt relevant to anything or anyone in the world. Especially not bleeding hearts claiming to be deeply concerned about people getting hurt.
>>234707NTA, but you need to put the phone down for a few days, Anon.
>>234709It was asked and answered. I didnt want to go that far into it, I was just trying to get this twit to realize that his safety obsession is not only silly, but small-minded.
>>234707What on earth are you going on about? Firstly, sumo safety regulations are written and enforced by the JSA - this is technically a subordinate of the MEXT agency in the Japanese government, but in practice is mostly autonomous. As you should know, Japan is famously anti-war since the absolute drubbing they received in WW2, and has no proper army these days. The Japanese government is not engaged in any wars, and is not responsible for anything occurring in the Middle East. The JSA certainly isn't. Secondly, you're the only one in this thread bringing war up at all. I haven't previously given my opinion on any of the various armed conflicts going on around the world - for your information, I am anti-war myself, I consider Israel to be an aggressor masquerading as a victim, and I didn't vote for and do not support any of the governments involved in that war or any other active wars. Finally, someone's position regarding world conflicts isn't necessarily (or often) linked to the same person's position regarding workplace and athletic health and safety - these are two entirely different areas of concern, formed and motivated by entirely different things.
>make one joke about dohyo
>leave computer, go to sleep
>come back to 4 hour argument over nothing
/sumo/...
>Wake up>100+ posts on /sumo/oh baby looks like some fags wanted to argue about tangentially related sumo topics while rage baiting each other
>the eventual pol turnof course
>>234683This would be sick though.
>>234714It's what it be these days, these dudes can't stop themselves.
Here's your new dohyo for the Hakuho Global Sumo Mongol Price Worldwide League.
>>234715There should be six extra bashos a year, so we don't end up degenerating into pointless shitflinging during the interims.
>>234715>This would be sick though.The dohyo is inside it to prevent the rikishi from getting sunburn.
Do you think there's any rikishi who have a genuinely big dick?
>>234721There's only about 600 of them. There's a fair chance that one of them might have a 1 in 1000 dick, but a low chance of anyone having a 1 in 10000 dick.
>jannies tried to interfere again
Lmao I literally did not even notice until I scrolled up and saw some deleted posts
What absolutely assblasted ineffectual retards
>>234721Just the ones with spinal injuries.
>>234724Oh no! Whatever will we do without all those shitty low-effort posts!
>>234725Uhhh isn't that most of them???
>>234726You mean like yours?
>>234728Anon, think about what you've just said. Look at how bad some of the posts on here are, and now understand that the ones that get deleted are even worse. The jannies are just clearing up the trash.
>>234730>he actually thinks 4chan jannies are the arbiters of good tasteHoly shit lmao
>>234732He's British, he wouldn't know taste if it bit him on his spotted dick.
>>234732They've got better taste than you. I remember what those deleted posts that you're lamenting said.
>>234733>Everyone I don't like is British!
Lets see if you still think so in a few minutes
>>234735Was something meant to happen?
>>234736Your mom said she would talk to you about it when she got back
And she got dressed and left a while ago
>>234721Someone said that Ura has a fat hog, and this was allegedly confirmed by a mawashi malfunction on tour
>>234739They were talking about Kinbozan.
>>234747need it or keep it?
What'd we think of the new chris video?
Apparently Atamifuji is learning challenged
The Asakoryu/Ishizaki bouts were a nice treat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzJCGMvdTK8
>>234751It's not an Atamifuji problem. Isegahama is still a rookie coach, and he isn't yet capable of bringing the best out of his men in the way he hopefully will be after five or ten years in the role. This is his first training camp where he's truly taking the lead, and some frustration is inevitable and invaluable.
>>234754Asahifuji is still there though, even if Teru is taking lead.
It feels wrong calling him Miyagino.
>>234755Of course he's still there, but it's like when a man becomes a dad. His own dad might still be very present in his life, but everyone accepts that things have shifted. Even if there's a man with forty years of dad experience on call whenever you need him, you still have to learn the lessons yourself.
>>234756Hakoho praised the precision of Teru's coaching though which would point to it being an ATF issue
>>234759Atamifuji is in a general slump this past year, and to me that indicates that whatever approach is being taken with the stable as a whole isn't working well for him. The transfer of power to a new master is (or ought to be) an excellent opportunity for a younger, fresher man to work out a new strategy for bringing Atamifuji's raw potential to the fore. I hope moto-Terunofuji is up to the challenge.
Iseghama has really fallen off since Teru became on oyakata there.
They used to have a yokozuna on the banzuke and now they don't even have anyone who can hack it at joi level.
I haven't looked up the latest heya power rankings, but it seems like good odds that Iseghama isn't even top ranked anymore, Hidenoumi's promotion on the next banzuke should put Kise above them
>>234764>Takkers>ATF>Hakuoho>KusanoThose are all up and comers even if some aren't shining at the moment
>>234751>watching anything that pathetic beta faggot makesNope.
>>234636>It *can* do that, but it does not necessarily do that.Rikishi have specific training on breakfalls and rolls to minimize the risk of injury. There are also rules that allow rikishi to protect themselves during falls.
>>234680>A boxing ring has ropes around it to stop men from being beaten back and falling off>MMA makes it impossible to fall out of the ringRopes are terrible at preventing people from falling out.
>>234766What do you expect me to do, read translated versions of japanese sports news myself?
>>234770>read translated versions of japanese sports newsWait, so Chris doesn't even understand Japanese himself? Despite living in Japan so he can stalk the rikishi?
>>234773Well I assume he does. I certainly don't.
>>234664>A football coach slipped on the grass>WTF WHY DO THEY PLAY ON SUCH A SLIPPERY SURFACE???People like you are why children are so coddled and weak.
I dunno why Teru is so shocked he can't get through to Atami. Atami is a big dope who joi'd on his size, not his skill. If his fighting spirit dwindles he's left with basically nothing.
>>234775Avoiding danger isn't weakness, it's common sense. Or are you a masochist, do you enjoy breaking your ankles?
>>234788And is this "danger" in the room with us right now?
>Kusano
>่้
>Grass Field
>Except ่ is nip for lol
>His shikona is really Field of Laughter
>>234812Danger is always lurking to catch the unwary.
>>234812https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyKjY3n8zqQ&t=188s
>>234815Is this the spinal injuries you were talking about?
>>234816>youI have never been in a general or any sort of forum where this is so common. Why does everyone here think that there's only two posters?
>>234817There ARE only two posters. Those who want the dohyo to be raised, and those who are faggots.
>>234785I can see him beating the shit out of his rikishi some day, guy looks scary.
>>234821I can see him going down as one of the greatest Oyakata of all time. The guy was 20+ yusho material easy if it wasn't for his exploding knees, but while all recent great Yokozuna have fallen out with the JSA, Teru seems to be in lock step with them. And apparently his insights into how rikishi can improve are surprisingly technical.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cr_qywaLdfw&ab_channel=%E6%97%A5%E6%9C%AC%E7%9B%B8%E6%92%B2%E5%8D%94%E4%BC%9A%E5%85%AC%E5%BC%8F%E3%83%81%E3%83%A3%E3%83%B3%E3%83%8D%E3%83%AB
TRUE sloppa. Not that beya shit.
>>234664>In a sane world, he should be entitled to a sizeable amount of compensationfucking am*ricans dictating other on what living in a sane world should be like
>>234826>apparently his insights into how rikishi can improve are surprisingly technical.Where'd you hear that?
>>234830I've heard it a couple times in the last few months from random sources. It's probably why he's so frustrated with Atamifuji taking nothing in.
>>234829How dare you accuse someone of being Am*rican without proof. Anon didn't even attach a picture of a hamburger.
>>234826>The guy was 20+ yusho material easy if it wasn't for his exploding kneeshate this kind of fanboi simp motivated reasoning. why is always "because he trains" so hard when a guy is good, but not his fault when he fails to take care of his body properly? teru was a lazy drunk and is responsible for his own mediocrity.
>>234835There is literally nothing you can do to prevent some part of your body exploding when you're fucking huge and train like a rikishi. Just gotta hope you're born with Tamawashi genes.
>>234836>knees can't be strengthened but arms and shoulders and thighs can
>>234828Exactly what I needed to start my day: rikishi unenthusiastically missing free throws to an EDM version of Ode to Joy
>>234839Someone needs to send Kneesovertoesguy to Japan to see if he can't devise some sort of preventative measure for exploding knees
>>234836There's a lot you can do to avoid developing diabetes, which seriously affects your body's ability to heal from injuries. There's a lot you can do to avoid developing hepatitis, which is ruinous for your health. Terunofuji used to be a spoilt rich kid, and thought he was hot shit as a young ozeki. He lived large and paid the price, and for a long time he was so weak that Koga could have beaten him. His comeback was impressive and admirable, but it was entirely his own fault that a comeback was necessary at all. He should have been a yokozuna five years earlier, and could have won much more cups if he had been.
>>234839What a stupid fucking post.
>>234840https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scAeHlmW0yI
No, but seriously: here's a recent vid of Kakuryu hooping with some Japanese basketball youtuber.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vd_rdLQl5po
>>234846Just so you know, "hooping" is negro slang for doing drugs anally.
>>234847That's what he's doing.
>>234828if japan had not strayed from the bushido path, atamifuji (pbuh) would have been within his rights to behead this man on the spot. and the crowd would have cheered
>>234846I like how all Kakuryu has to do is walk backwards and the twink can't do shit.
>>234847Inaccurate. It's prison slang for concealing an item inside your anus.
>>234855One of the first things George Floyd was asked minutes before dying of a fentanyl overdose was if he'd been hooping, to which he replied "yeah". He wasn't in prison at this time.
>>234856Yeah well my source is Wes Watson.
I think my source would beat yours in a fight.
>>234849It's ok to bully maegashira
>>234859Were any of them Sanyaku at the time? Abi bobs in and out while Onosato only made it in May.
OKAY FAGGOTS IT'S TIME
https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp
https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp
https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp
WHICH OF THE UPPER SANYAKU DO YOU THINK WILL DO THE BEST IN THE JULY BASHO
>>234868It's Kotozakura's turn.
>>234869Honestly, I fucking wish.
>Hosh and 'sato put in 11-4s, beating all Maegashira and losing close fights to upper Sanyaku who continue their 'zeki runs>Kotozakura shows how incredibly unhappy he was to be forced to be part of making Onosato's tsuna with a 13-2Y>He follows it up with a 12-3Y in September while Kirishima and Wakatakakage both make OzekiImagine the shitstorm.
>>234870>upper Sanyaku who continue their 'zeki runsupper is ozeki and yokozuna
lower is sekiwake and komusubi
Current sumo stable power rankings:
1. Isegahama - 5 maegashira, 2 juryo, 1 makushita joi
2. Kise - 4 maegashira, 2 juryo
3. Tatsunami - 1 yokozuna, Meisei, Akua
4. Nishonoseki - 1 dai yokozuna, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
5. Oitekaze 1 sanyaku, 2 maegashira, Daiyusho
6. Sadogatake - 1 ozeki, 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
7. Arashio - 1 sanyaku, 1 maegashira, 2 juryo
8. Naruto - 1 sanyaku, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
9. Sakaigawa - 2 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
10. Ajigawa - 1 sanyaku, 1 makushita joi
11. Tokitsukaze - 2 maegashira
12. Takadagawa - 5 juryo
13. Futagoyama - 1 maegashira, 2 juryo
14. Nakamura - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
15. Isenoumi - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
16. Kataonami - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
17. Otowayama - KiriSHITma
18. Otake - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
19. Tokiwayama - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
20. Shikoroyama - Abi
21. Tagonoura - Takayasu
22. Takasago - 1 maegashira, 2 makushita joi
23. Onomatsu - Onokatsu
24. Takekuma - Gonoyama
25. Hanaregoma - Ichiyamamoto
26. Kokonoe - Chiyoshoma
27. Ikazuchi - Shishi
28. Dewanoumi - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
29. Tamanoi - 2 juryo
30. Kasugano - 1 juryo
31. Fujishima - 1 juryo
32. Oshiogawa - 1 juryo
33. Nishikido - 1 juryo
34. Hakkaku - 1 makushita joi
35. Oshima - 1 makushita joi
36. Onoe - 1 makushita joi
Notes on the rankings:
Sumo stable power rankings are a feature available exclusively on 4chan, they are trademarked, copyrighted and I peed on them just to make sure.
These ranking feign objectivity but in reality are entirely based on the author's prejudices and misunderstandings of the sport and it's participants. There are probably misspellings and typographical errors too.
Unlisted stables are too awful to have been included in the rankings and should feel ashamed of themselves.
Sumo Spiffy will never make a video about these rankings, thank god.
I would also like to express my gratitude to the JSA for allowing me to view their website, that was a big help.
>>234882>Hakkaku talking shit about any other oyakata
I love fat men!!!!!! I have sex with one he is the best
seel
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I want slop before the basho
>>234882>One yokozuna beats two san'yaku>One san'yaku beats two maegashira>One maegashira beats two juryoEach step up is much harder than the previous one, and should be recognised as such.
>>234882>Onomatsu - OnokatsuAre their other rikishi called things like Onosatsu, Onobatsu, and Onopatsu?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJizGOqgH7o
>>234907Slop day continues. Tatsunami is launching an international fan club.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHb7SUGfsHM
>>234882Impressive, very nice. Now let's see the updated power rankings for Psicopรกtico and Dandadan.
>>234909Absolutely love a Japanese curry me. Would love to slurp one down with the lads after a hard day's work.
>>234896Sure and some stats are list as "maegashira" but someone in upper maegashira counts more than someone in the double digits, so having an M2e might beat having a J9e & J13w while at the same time having M16w wouldn't beat J1e + J1w. Unless perhaps I really like the guy at M16w in which case I might let it slide
>>234924How about a 1.5x modifier for being in the joi? Then J1 and J2 would still beat a lone M16.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTWZfAolmZw
The 1991 retirement of sumo legend David Jones, who retired after 30 years of presenting a PanAm Airlines trophy to yusho winners. He was noted for his extremely poor command of Japanese, which he reprised at 10:07 here for his final performance. His pronunciation of "Hyoushoujou" became a meme.
In the interview segment, he talks about how, once, he failed to write down the name of the winning wrestler, and had to lean over to him to ask him his name (Wajima) before finishing the trophy declaration. Wajima's eyes bugged out when he realized what he was being asked, Jones recalls.
There is also footage of him being lifted by Takamiyama at a party in Jones' honor.
>Tatsunami starting an international fan club
>not using traditional straw bales in the dohyo
What if they split and joined Dayan Sumo? Can you imagine shitstorm?
>>234931They can't join Dayan Sumo, it's for amateurs.
>>234926Is he the reason theres one guy going HYOOSHYOOJOO in award ceremony outside of tokyo?
>>234934Do you have a clip? I don't recall hearing that. But yes, possibly
>>234925Each individual is judged subjectively by standards which only somewhat mimic an objective numerical appraisal in order to give the rankings a veneer of authoritativeness
>>234899Onoratsu - he finks to the JSA if you bully him
Onovatsu - takes 15% of ur money
Onofatsu
>>234954Onobatsu - has never won a bout due to his insistence on entering the ring upside-down.
>>234954>OnofatsuHe's severely undersized for a sumo wrestler
Onozigguratsu - the raised dohyo meme
Onoplapsu - Asanoyama after moving stable
>>234882>Kataonamithey only have 4 rishiki total, two have salaries.
is there any other stable that successful, with 50% of the crew making sekitori rank?
alternatively
Kataonami must suck cause they can't recruit, nobody wants to go there.
>>234965Surely having such a high sekitori rate would make people want to go there. Also doesn't this mean Kataonami has more than one foreign rikishi? I guess that rule isn't hard and fast?
>>234968Maybe not, since you'd instantly become someone's servant, have to go on jungyo, carry bags, wipe ass, etc. In a stable with only other low rankers, there's a good chance you can escape most of the scut work.
Takahara looks pretty huge
>>234968The rule is relaxed for stable closures. Tamashoho moved over when his former stable, Nakagawa, was shut down because its stablemaster was demoted.
>>234968If your stable folds or you get moved, you can join a stable that already has a foreigner.
>>234982He must be laughing his lmao off in the grave watching how embarrassingly mediocre horseshitryu is as a yokozuna.
Yoshibayama looking jacked
>>234985>Because of the bullet in his ankle, Yoshibayama's style of fighting was erratic. It also did not help that his favourite technique was the controversial ketaguri, or leg kick,[4] which was considered to be unacceptable at his top yokozuna rankif it's not oshidashi or yorikiri it is dishonourabuu
t. japan sumo pro
>>234982Golden grin Olympic Jiji
>Aonishiki, no bouts just basics
>Onosato, same
>Hoshoryu, also same
No bouts just basics meta incoming
>>235010It's like they were all given the same script. Even Zak has said the same thing.
>>235011Nothing new there, then.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWVeT9LCb78
EAT YOUR SLOP STRAIGHT FROM THE OVEN
>>235017Wrong! Wait your turn and eat your slop in order of rank.
file
md5: 2272c5386aefcb373d4c87a03006941e
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>Newest sChrishzoid video about Hakkaku
>>235010They got tired of pretending to fight each other
>>235025lol, heโs going to be fuming about Hakuho for the rest of his life.
>>235032it makes me sick to see that pretender shake hands with a REAL martial artist
>>235043I'm sure Seagal didn't mind, anon
Good Chris video. Who is going to take over the chairmanship after Hakkaku?
>Futagoyama slop is like 1.5 months old
why do they do this
their hopes for the May tournament are utterly irrelevant on June 22nd
it's not amusing to see Koga say he'll do his best and know he went 1-5-1
I'm sure they didn't used to offset this much
>>235054its for idiots, thats why its so terrible
>>235054For a half million subs channel, it's a really barebones operation. The cameraman works alone with the benefit of the occasional static camera. The subtitles are apparently done personally by the okami-san. The upload schedule is brutal considering how long the videos are. They should make it once a week or hire more staff.
I wanna see a show tournament where gyoji fight in the ring while rikishi do the judging. Imagine Onosato darting around the edge going
>TEREBETAAAAAHTEREBETEREBETEREBETAAAAAHHHH
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgeEvQiihC8
Not to be outdone by Futagoyama, Oshima just dropped a sloppa.
m
md5: 1f2aaca5119498ad1ca7e70cd06ff718
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>>235062why not watch something better?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlWSnPie3A8
>>235065No subtitles, no watch.
>>235068Yes, they have filtered themselves out of my smorgasbord of entertainment by being too lazy to translate their content for me. Sad!
>>235054i found it funnier Nobehara being happy about not having to be on chanko duty anymore in a video a few weeks back, while he was 3-4 in may so he's going back to kitchen.
>>235065Cute
>>235066It has subtitles
k
md5: 63cb74e56ecf4f6cbcfe34b3b00c4692
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I love autotranslate so much
>>235083I dunno it seems realistic for sumo wrestlers
>Hakkaku whining that youngsters don't want to become rikishi
That's because there's no one inspiring them to do it. Onosato and his incoming rivalry with Hoshoryu has singlehandedly saved Japanese sumo. Maybe if Hakkaku wasn't such a shit oyakata he could've raised up the next big thing himself.
>>235085Hakkaku's dad was a fisherman. Compared to the prospect of hauling fish nets in for the rest of your life, becoming a sumo wrestler sounds like a great option. If you have a comfortable, easy life, why would you even consider joining a stable?
>>235086This post reeks of unemployed.
>>235088Are you trying to argue that life in Tokyo didn't sound more appealing than being a fisherman in Hokkaido during the 70s?
>>235089>>235092Reddit is down the hall and to the left.
>>235093But I can't call you a fag on Reddit.
>>235090It's not the 70s anymore and his father is still fishing at 88 when I'm sure he could've comfortably retired a long time ago considering his son is presumably wealthy, what with being a former Yokozuna and Chairman of the JSA. Maybe the guy just likes fishing so doesn't mind doing it as a job. Maybe "hauling fish nets" isn't as bad as it sounds from your armchair.
>>235092Really wish this ended in some light-hearted sparring, though it looks like Hakuho would fucking dunk on Asa now.
>>235095weirdly defensive about this
>>235095It was the 70s when Hakkaku decided to pursue sumo instead of following his father's footsteps, or looking at the other employment available in his tiny, bleak home town. Life as a rikishi, even in the bad old days, seemed like a lifeline and the prospect of becoming even a middling sekitori represented a huge improvement. This is not an uncommon sentiment - this is why rural Japan is increasingly desolate and depopulated while Tokyo continues to sprawl. The same goes for any developed country. If given a chance, any chance at all, the vast majority of young people choose to abandon the dirty, difficult and dangerous jobs their fathers and grandfathers did and move to the big city.
>>235098So you're saying that sumo prays on poor children?
>>235099No, sumo scrapes the bottom of the barrel of poor children.
>>235098The comments by Chrschizo seemed to suggest that some stables are more strict about wearing kimono and having their hair tied than others.
I thought was a global rule.
It would suck if one stable got to go out in normal clothes with their hair down for normal errands and others would have to get dressed up like itโs the 19th century.
>>235101It should be a global rule.
>>235101>having self respect is a punishment just because you're a repulsive slob doesn't mean everyone else wants to be one
>>235101It's a global rule for official functions, the optional part is whether they have to get dressed up just to go down to the neighbourhood combini. Considering they need special dedicated hairdressers to get the hair tied up properly, even for non-sekitori, it can be impractical for quick trips, and impossible for stables that don't have a dedicated hairdresser living with them.
>>235103I'd hate to see active rikishi wearing suits as much as I hate to see them in hoodies. Sumo deliberately rejects modern aesthetics, and this is a huge part of its appeal.
>>235103what the fuck are you talking about?
Also, they absolutely wear normal clothes out. Beyond just the stable-to-stable variance, my understanding is that it's a matter of to what extent what they're doing is seen as a function of their 'cultural role'. Taking out the trash, for example, doesn't require anything. Going to a restaurant would require the topknot, but maybe not the kimono. Going to a charity event requires the works.
>>235107The master decides what is and isn't required to take out the trash or go to a restaurant. It's got nothing to do with how official the outing is, if the boss says you have to wear your kimono to go to the konbini then woe betide you if you disobey him.
>>235109I'd bet anything that there are provisions specifically about this in the sumo regulations. The idea that it's an unofficial policy with no clarification is ridiculous.
>>235110I don't think there's an official regulation regarding appropriate attire for trips to the local Lawson. It's like how some stables have two practice dohyos, everyone has different chanko recipes, and the amount of free time each master gives his disciples - a stable master is (or is supposed to be) almost entirely autonomous in terms of the day-to-day running of his stable.
>>235110You underestimate how much leeway the elders give themselves when it comes to the running of their stables.
>>235104>and impossible for stables that don't have a dedicated hairdresser living with themAccording to the current JSA website, there's 10 stables without their own hairdressers: Takasago, Futagoyama, Onoe, Takekuma, Shikoroyama, Nishiiwa, Nakamura, Ajigawa, Hidenoyama and Asahiyama. I'd imagine those stables give their wrestlers more slack so they're not having to constantly visit other stables first just so they can get groceries.
>>235111>>235112https://www.sanspo.com/article/20180106-HSWK6JE2F5OXFFJLLJXPJV36QY/
Here's an article stating that Kagamiyama & Kasugano, in their role as NSK PR men, personally warned Takanohana's rikishi (Takakeisho, Takagenji etc) specifically for wearing casual clothing in public. If there weren't a rule written down somewhere, they wouldn't have been able to do that.
>>235116>in their role as NSK PR menYeah yeah.
>>235082>hire professional translator>"Hmm, yes, this is wrong. What he says is:">Titty wrinkles. I chose a lot of eyebrows, but I'm busy. Blue Wakana Moro.
>>235096>Hakuho>trained with his disciples semi-frequently>bad kneesvs
>Asashoryu>dumpsters Hoshoryu routinely>had a tumorseems 50-50
>>235111>I speculate about the contents of regulations which I never have and never will read>my headcannon speculations prove me right
>>235117>receives information that contradicts predetermined narrative >information declared invalid>predetermined narrative stands unchallenged Hey Chris.
This text intentionally left black.
>>235103Wearing a kimono in your daily routine in Japan is the same as a fedora tipping R*ddit athiest wearing a suit all the time. Both stick out like a sore thumb and get weird looks because, contrary to what you believe, sticking out like a sore thumb is NOT you respecting yourself.
>>235133Sumo wrestlers are actively preserving cultural traditions such as wearing kimonos though. That's why it matters for them.
>>235134And wearing suits used to be a cultural thing in the west. You must really admire fedora tipping athiests, huh?
>>235135>tradition badI bet you want to lower the dohyo faggot.
>>235137>Is that...>IS THAT A HECKIN YOKOZUNARINO NOT WEARING A KIMONO??? AAIIIEEEE HAKKAKU-SAMA SAVE ME!!!
>>235138Who ever accused Hosh of having hinkaku?
>>235140Just put the Asa 'jak over his face and call it a day.
>Despite winning 3 of his last 7 basho and getting a JY in there too, Asashoryu lost on the final day of all 7
lmao
>>234985faggots who scream roids on any rikishi with big traps have been really quiet about this one.
Hakkaku is the problem with recruitment. Youngsters would be more willing to sign up if the face of the JSA wasn't some cranky old fuck. Put someone younger with a sense of humour in the position like Oshima.
>>235148The problem with recruitment is that 90% of all sumo wrestlers never get a salary, and spend their youth living like monks and doing ass-wiping duty. If every wrestler got paid the Japanese minimum wage, recruitment numbers would skyrocket.
>>235153Thereโs also the fact of the health issues. Plenty of Japanese enjoy sumo, but far fewer of them want to purposely become bloatlords to do it, especially in a society that openly fat-shames like Japanโs.
Lots of wrestlers have mentioned that they do not like their bodies, Ura comes to mind.
Before anyone starts shrieking, Iโm not suggesting anything be changed. Itโs fine the way it is. Thatโs just the way it is, though.
>>235155This is true, and ties in to my point. It's a hell of a sacrifice to make just for the chance of maybe becoming a sekitori one day.
>>234534>>234537probably, but maybe not. no 30kg plate. reds are usually 25kg
from inside out it would be
20, 20, 25, 10, 10, 2.5, 2 5 = 90x2 = 180+20 = 200
20, 20, 20, 10, 10, 5, 5 = 90 x 2 = 180+20 = 200
basically, its some mix of calibrated and non calibrated plates
your thoughts on today's Chris video?
>>235145Turns out grapplers have always been muscular.
Unidentified toriteki in May 1920.
In the old days, before the building of various bridges and tunnels, the only way to get to Kyushu was by boat.
>>235186I think it's ridiculous that Hosh thinks he can act like the "senior" yokozuna after his shitshow debut and his utter inability to perform at Onosato's level
>>235206consider the rope
>>235206He was promoted first, he's senior over Onosato by definition. And I don't think he particularly wants it either, he would do just fine without the additional pressure that comes with it. It's just the way it is.
>>235206Nearly every Yokozuna, at some point in his career, is upstaged by a fresh new one, like an old lion being driven away into the wilderness. Hoshoryu is now completely absolved from the responsibility of having to contend every basho, and as long as he wins a few important bouts every time in technical, experienced ways then he can preserve what's left of his pride.
>>235211>at some point in his career,for horseryu that was in his first 'sho as 'zuna.
onosato will take over y1e after this upcoming meet and will never relinquish it
>>235211>>235212It's gonna be so fucking funny when Hoshoryu retires with a 38-7 head-to-head record over Onosato
>>235213And a 7-38 yusho count record.
>>235213>>235214Akebono/Takanohana 2.0
>>235214you can stop jerking off Onosato now, he's been soft for hours
Onosato is too high ranked to beat Hosh
>>235216I was actually jerking Hoshoryu off, nobody really thinks he's going to get 7 yushos by the end of his career.
>>235153>If every wrestler got paid the Japanese minimum wageI feel confident in saying that a place to stay in central Tokyo plus the cost of all the food they eat probably comes to more than the Japanese minimum. Hasn't rice doubled in price in Japan recently?
>>235218I'd be surprised if he made 6.
>>235222>a place to stay in central TokyoYou're sharing a room with like 8 other men, so you're looking at 1/9th the equivalent cost.
>>235223this but about Onosato
>>235222It would certainly put the JSA well out of pocket if they paid their low-ranking wrestlers properly. The business model is only sustainable if you can get away with paying 90% of your talent with room and board.
>>235222They wouldn't have to be in central Tokyo or eat so much if they weren't sumo wrestlers.
>>235227If my grandmother had wheels she would be a bike.
>>235232>everyone knows Anon's grandmother
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzqqRHVwUVo&ab_channel=ChrisSumo
S L O P
>>235236>channel=ChrisSumoNice try, Chris
>>235226>The business model is only sustainable if you can get away with paying 90% of your talent with room and board.I think that's only true because of the NSK's actions to limit sumo's growth. Look at the social media ban, or the new heya channel restrictions despite how the channels have done considerable work towards generating new sumo fans. Look at how rikishi aren't allowed to appear in commercials anymore without explicit NSK approval because of some weird vendetta in the 90s.
In today's world, many people follow sports and buy things just because they like individual athletes. I think the Association could easily afford to pay minimum wage to toriteki in a world where all those sorts of avenues are decently explored.
>>235246At the end of the day, if the JSA doesn't offer new recruits a good enough deal, the flow of recruitment will dry up. They can't force young boys to become rikishi, however much they'd like to.
>We must protect the dignity of sumo!
Hakkaku says while everyone laughs at the fatsos. Sumo would be a lot more dignified if rikishi were lean like they used to be and not just lardos.
>>235249There's no way for any sort of wrestling to be dignified. It's an inherently comical sport.
>>235249>things you can say about rikishi but not about women
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otXi4R6KhKY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3djPyXzKwQM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aaipuNADaI
A 27 year old man has moved to Japan to try to convince the NSK to let him in. At least a few news outlets have reported on his plight, and he's uploaded videos of himself training at Asahiyamabeya and Tatsunamibeya.
He has surprisingly good Japanese for just some guy, and he's saying all the right things about "honor" and "dignity" and "sumo is a way of life" in the interviews. May he forge a path forward for all the 23+ retards here.
>>235255What would his shikona be?
>OibeiyamaThey should make an exception for the guy since he's sincere and was genuinely fucked over by everyone becoming retarded in 2020. What's the worst that could happen? He spends 4-5 years there, sits in the arse end of Makushita, then retires? That's hardly worse than what most rikishi achieve. But then again Hakkaku is a complete faggot.
>>235256They should remove the age limit for new recruits completely. Think of all the depressed salarymen that would jump at the chance for a change, instead of jumping in front of a train.
>>235255I hereby declare Yarden-san as /sumo/'s official guy, on the condition that he renounces Israel
>>235253People who have strong opinions about what kind of men they think are the best looking can say it.
>>235258He'd renounce his own mother if the JSA said he had to.
>>235260>You may join a smaller, lesser known beya on one condition>What is it, Hakkaku-sama? I'll do anything!>You must... denounce the Talmud
file
md5: 065b546a2ea9b7362bdbfbe7c757964d
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>>235255>climbs ranks>gets citizenship>joins JSA>climbs ranks>"sumo is dying, it must modernise">abolishes foreigner limit, introduces female gyoji, and dare i say it... allows sumotori to drive
banzu
md5: ba333a201e9538f169cb0adff5ce424f
๐
new banzuke is out, post your reactions
Vintage slop, January 1920.
>>235255>>235256>What would his shikona be?>>OibeiyamaKiragoyama (Kill a Goy)
>>235272>Aonishiki>not YokozunaNot my banzuke.
>>235289>ใใฌใฃใ ใใใ (Anuddashoa)Shame the gyoji would say it when he wins instead of when he loses.
>He gets thrown out>Breaks his neck>ANUDDASHOA!!!!!
>>235279Sumo has always been prime slop material
>ๅฅ่ฏใๅนณๅฎๆไปฃใฎ็ธๆฒ็ฏ(ใใพใใฎใใก)ใๅทฆใปๅณ่ฟ่กๅบใซๅฅใใฆ็ธๆฒใๅใใพใใใ่ช้ฃใฎๅๅฃซใๅใคใจ?
>ๆญฃ่งฃ: ใฟใใชใง็ฌใๅฃฐใใใใฆใฏใใใใฆใ
>In the "Sumai no sechi" court sumo tradition, which lasted from the Nara period through the Heian period (710-1185 AD), what was the appropriate response to your side's rikishi winning?
>Answer: Everyone [on the winning side] laughing at and mocking the loser.
Slop-bros, I'm starving...
>>235306Then we in fact are preserving cultural tradition
Wonderful
>>235306Was this all always just a way to watch fat guys fall over? This whole time?
I was watching some Takanohana videos.
He was the most impressive Yokozuna I have seen.
Looking at Takanohana and Akebono they looked stronger than rikishi from later eras.
>>235316There's a reason why everyone who actually knows sumo agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90s, and would be lucky to even get to sekiwake.
>>235317>everyone who actually knows sumo agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90sSo... only Konishiki?
>>235317I wouldn't go that far. But the level of sumo of Takanohana and Akebono was higher. I guess sumo really was stronger in that era.
Can't imagine those guys having problem with someone like Hokuseiho
>>235322Who struggled against Hokuseiho in the modern era?
>>235316Takanohana looked insanely solid in his prime.
>>235324He is 2-2 against Asanoyama and Oho.
>>235322I got no problem with Chad, but I never really thought of Akebono having "high level" sumo. He was just massive.
>>235322>But the level of sumo of Takanohana and Akebono was higher. I guess sumo really was stronger in that era.Older generations are always good at making what they do look more difficult.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0K0OMWI9xg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTkMDcpTEkU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaeID2gM29s
They aren't actually better.
>>235330being huge and taking advantage of your size is high level sumo. manlets needing to cope by resorting to obscure moves to win and still ending up at M9 every banzuke is cringe level sumo
>>235333How big are you, Anon? You must be pretty huge to be able to call M9 sumo wrestlers manlets.
>>235333Please kill yourself.
>>235335enho will never make it back to salaried rank
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90ptwPX8z14&t=1672s
April 29th, 1922. Sumo is held on the grounds of the Detached Palace at Kasumigaseki for all the politicians to enjoy.
The sequence of events shown is:
Kashiwayama vs Yamanishiki, then Onishiki's yokozuna dohyoiri, then Fukuyanagi vs Tachihikari, Otohira vs Fukuyanagi, Tochigiyama vs Onishiki, and a yumitorishiki performed by Hitachishima. Then "practice sumo" - what we call butsukarigeiko now - between Tochigiyama and Momijigawa.
This is the only footage I've ever seen of either Tochigiyama or Onishiki wrestling.
>>235336Good. I don't know why you care though. There are hundreds of wrestlers in between Akebono and Enho in terms of height. Why do you pretend only extremes exist?
>>235253You can say anything you want about anyone you want when you aren't a giant pussy, like you. Faggot.
>>235344It's a riff on Carnac, you fucking drooling moronic retard. Fuck, what an uneducated, low class fucking peasant dipshit you are.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnac_the_Magnificent
.....
md5: 78799c890e314ecf8a57750312d66aa8
๐
>>235345>Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny CarsonAmericans literally consider watching television to be a form of education.
>>235345NTA, but I assumed it was a reference to Who's Line is it Anyway.
>>235344Why are you such an angry little bitch? Just leave if you don't like it here.
>>235348>Who'sWhose... derp
>>235256>What would his shikona be?Kikekuryu
Wakaheebakeisho
Takashekelyama
>>235349Damn you corrected your mistake, I was going to use it against you in a soon-to-be argument about something completely different.
>>235347Just own up to the fact that you're uncultured, it's nothing to be ashamed of
>>235317>agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90sBitter, jealous motherfuckers? Sure. Any reasonable person wouldn't agree to that at all. Hakuho was a combination of technique and strength, and what set him and Asahoryu apart was their Mongolian wrestling background that the Japs didn't have, and hence, couldn't counter as effectively.
>>235352Ah so the goalposts have gone from "uneducated" to "uncultured". Like how blacks stealing and destroying property is "dey culcha". I'm not even the guy you were replying to btw, I just chimed in to call you a faggot, faggot.
>>235345Seethe more, pussy.
>>235354Also check my time digits.
>>235348Fuck you too, faggot.
...
md5: ff0049d725a2e1574f7bcd75e1a2de51
๐
>>235354>I just chimed in to call you a faggot, faggot.
>>235256>What would his shikona be?ๆฒณ้ฆฌ็พ
Another high quality series of /sumo/ posts
>>235361>Punished Zak>A man forced to make the rope for a guy who became Ozeki after him
>>235361It used to be so whimsical and friendly in this general. Now every week you have people retching all sorts of bile about their most hated wrestlers, people viciously attacking each other for no real reason, endless arguments about nothing. The evil spirits have taken over, and we need to drive them out.
>>235363What can men do against such reckless hate?
>>235363>Onosato performs his first basho dohyo-iri>Half the posts in the thread are deleted, their posters banned
>>235363>>235361ไปๆนใ็กใ
TL Note: It be how it do
>>235363you can thank youtube channels for the influx of newniggers
>>235337BRING
BACK
DOHYO
POSTS
>>235369You mean the guy who was building his own dohyo?
translation: watch out we got a yokozuna over here
Changing of the guard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BA9TpJsstR4
>>235374I really hope he doesn't try and cheapen what being a yokozuna means.
>>235406He can't. He isn't a yokozuna any more, he isn't involved in training men to become yokozuna, he isn't part of the YDC or the JSA or any other professional body relating to ozumo. Hakuho's opinion on sumo and on what constitutes a yokozuna is worth no more and no less than the opinion of a random ojisan down at the snack bar.
>>235407Is the word "yokozuna" trademarked or something?
>>235408I doubt it. It doesn't really need to be - anyone can call himself an admiral, but that just makes you look stupid if you don't have the fleet of ships to back up your claim.
>>235409That's sort of my point.
>>235410My point is that it wouldn't matter if Hakuho decided to start handing out "Hakuho Dayan Global Yokozuna" licences. He's not fooling anyone who matters.
>>235403https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76GLNiwc5ks
>>235417>No fatslap>Just eatingIt's not the same.
>>235411I really donโt think he intends to do that.
His thing is probably just going to be a broader based approach to identifying international talent and pipelining it to Japan. He likes scouting out talent.
Somewhere in Finland or Senegal or Chile is a little kid who could be the greatest sumo wrestler ever, but weโll never see him because heโll never even learn sumo exists and his talent will be squandered.
If Hakuho figures out a way to find that kid, the sport would only be better off.
(Except for Japanophiles, they will continue to seethe until the end of time.)
>>235421This makes no sense. You can only have one foreigner per stable, so pipelining more foreign kids to Japan would just result in most of them getting passed over, or never considered at all because your 25 year old Mongolian has ten years left in him. Hakuho is also a divisive figure, and there aren't going to be many oyakatas willing to reject a reliable prospect from his preferred recruiting school to take a chance on Hakuho's new Senegalese boy.
>>235423>You can only have one foreigner per stableI expect to see this rule relaxed if the recruiting crunch gets worse.
>>235426Pretty sure less than half of stables have a foreigner as of right now so it's not like there's huge demand from foreigners to become a rikishi. Hell, Kataonami has two (Tamawashi and Tamashoho).
>>235427>Hell, Kataonami has twoThatโs allowed only when a stable shuts down. Tamashoho was at Kasugayama then at Nakagawa, that whole farrago.
>>235428I meant it more as two of the current foreigners being at the same stable means there's even less stables that have their foreigner slot taken. About half of all foreign rikishi are sekitori, that's how few there are. If anyone was young, talented, and wanted to be a rikishi, there's plenty of space for them as of right now. There's just no foreign interest in sumo because it's nothing more than fatslap to outsiders and we can experience that down any bar-ridden highstreet on a Friday or Saturday night, so the odds of the JSA relaxing that rule are close to zero. And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot.
>>235429>And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot.Can I get a QRD on this? I only get Chrisโs schizo point of view, because I canโt read Japanese.
>>235429I mean, itโs all academic, something to talk about between basho.
Hakuhoโs endeavor will most likely fail. Heโll run around as a celebrity for a few years, post on social media, then fade away.
>>235430Hakkaku is a textbook Japanese salaryman who thinks kissing ass makes good things happen automatically. Despite being a former yokozuna his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitori which in my imo is a really bad look for the JSA Chairman (Musashimaru is half brain dead so he gets a pass). No top prospects want to deal with his ass.
>>235432Why is being textbook Japanese a bad thing? The entire sport is founded on extremely conservative principles as a way to preserve Japanese culture and ways of life. Can you give any examples of Hakkaku actually doing anything wrong, or do you just despise everyone in Japan that isn't a radical progressive?
>>235433>Can you give any examples of Hakkaku actually doing anything wrongHe didnโt resign and let Hakuho be the new Chairman.
>>235432>his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitori which in my imo is a really bad look for the JSA ChairmanHokutofuji just retired, you fool. He had the heart of sumo at his heya in makuuchi for 8 years.
>>235432>Despite being a former yokozuna his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitoriThis is JSA-brain at its peak.
>this guy is really good at shoving other guys>that means he must also be equally good at coaching and also managing a stable>now heโs old as fuck>letโs put him in charge of the entire organization strictly on the basis of having been really good at shoving guys decades ago and being able to go this long without him or one of his recruits committing too many felonies.
>>235439And he couldnt produce a single other makuuchi rikishi in that entire time
Which says it was Hokutofujis talent and not Hakakkus teaching
>>235427Futagoyama has three
Roga (Russia)
Nabatame (Thailand)
Kuwae (Philippines)
>>235408No. See the several pro wrestlers who have referred to themselves as such.
>>235442>it was Hokutofuji's talent and not Hakkaku's teachingIf you want to play that game, then this is true of essentially all sekitori.
Regardless, his ability as a coach has nothing to do with his ability as an administrator. I don't even like Hakkaku, but come on.
>>235448Next time read my whole post instead of just the part you want to disagree with
Shitnuts
>>235452>And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot. ... Hakkaku is a textbook Japanese salaryman who thinks kissing ass makes good things happen automatically.What does this have to do with the success or lack of success of his students
>>235442Did you forget about Okinoumi?
Hakkakubeya has produced 11 sekitori in its current incarnation.
When guys get old, they typically slow down recruitment unless theyโre running a mega-stable. As chairman, he probably didnโt have the time and energy to devote to coaching and development.
The previous chairman, Kitanoumi, didnโt do much better, with none of his design making it past komusubi.
>>235432>Conservatives are... le BAD!
>>235463>The sky is... le BLUE!
>>235448If Hakkaku's so good at administrating fatslap, why are they struggling to get youngsters into it?
>>235473Because being a sumo wrestler sucks a big bag of dicks.
>>235474Says person who isn't a sumo wrestler. The JSA should be using beyaslop to their advantage. If kids are all over Youtube, push for more beyaslop that shows the good side of being a rikishi. The fun days out, the good food, make sure you get young rikishi on camera talking about how rewarding the training feels.
Oh wait they didn't have Youtube in the 1800s so I guess that's off limits :/
>>235475Japanese kids aren't that stupid, at least not en masse. Everyone knows that sumo is incredibly difficult and requires immense personal sacrifices. Everyone knows that you're more likely to peak at sandanme than at san'yaku. Recruitment numbers will remain low until the JSA sweetens the deal, or until employment prospects for young men become dire. Even watching sumo isn't particularly popular with young people these days.
>>235476And yet Japanese kids all want to be Youtubers when most Youtube channels don't make money either. Curious!
>>235477Most Youtubers don't have to gain 150 pounds and headbutt each other every day.
>>235475>The JSA should be using beyaslop to their advantage.How many young guys out there love watching sumo, love participating in combat sports/martial arts, and have the discipline and talent to go pro, but decide, nah, I donโt want to ALSO have to be a fat fucking blob, live like a monk, and dress like itโs the 1800s, Iโm going to go into MMA instead?
>>235478They don't get a free place to live in Tokyo and mountains of free food either. And both rikishi and Youtubers have zero future prospects, except at least rikishi have fan clubs who help sort them out with SOMETHING when they retire.
Becoming a rikishi is a far better idea than becoming a Youtuber and yet becoming a Youtuber is the most popular thing kids want to do.
>>235454>replying to me and then quoting a completely separate and different postAre you just retarded
>>235479Again, most youngsters who get into MMA just get brain damage and retire in irrelevance. And you should know by now that you don't have to be a fat blob to be a top rikishi. Even in the top division there's plenty of guys in decent enough shape. Asakoryu, Midorifuji, the Waka bros, Aonishiki, and I'd even say Hoshoryu are all in strongfat physique at worst. Women go nuts for that shit.
>>235476Only losers go in thinking they're going to fail
>>235480Being a Youtuber is easy. It doesn't require you to put yourself through grueling training, it doesn't require you to ruin your health, it doesn't require you to abandon all semblance of a normal social life. Youtubers don't have to have a goofy hairstyle, Youtubers don't have to do chores for their seniors, Youtubers don't risk crippling injuries. It sure is a surprise that kids would rather be Youtubers than sumo wrestlers.
>>235484>Being a Youtuber is easyNo, being a BAD Youtuber is easy. All of the best channels on Youtube are made by people who have some sort of expertise or knowledge in something. Very few get big on low quality slop content.
>Captcha: G0DN0
>>235485And being a bad rikishi is just as hard as being a good one.
>>235486>Koga puts in the same level of effort as Mita in trainingWoah...
>>235482>And you should know by now that you don't have to be a fat blob to be a top rikishi. Even the โskinnyโ rikishi are diabetic.
Put that aside and itโs still
>you donโt get any time off >you donโt get paid>you have to live in the stable >hope you pick a stable you like, because you canโt ever change>you are effectively a slave to your seniors>youโre not going to get any intense coaching until you demonstrate that your stablemaster is going to get some return off you. Until then, youโre on your own>you canโt drive a car>you canโt have a girlfriend >you canโt wear normal clothes >you canโt get a haircut The fact that they have any recruits at all is miraculous.
>>235487he could've been the next Mr. Beast
lol
really I don't know who these fuckfaces think they're kidding with this
>>235487Koga's been doing butsukari for four years in order to peak at Jonidan. He'd have had a much easier time being a Youtuber, wouldn't he?
>>235490He literally is a youtuber
>>235491Maybe that's the future of sumo. Forget about the actual wrestling, they can just be ugly bastard idol groups on Youtube.
>>235488>you donโt get any time offThey don't really "work" either.
>you donโt get paidThey get an allowance which is actually more than it sounds like because so many of their living costs are already covered for them.
>you have to live in the stableOh no, a permanent residence!
>hope you pick a stable you like, because you canโt ever changeLiterally a non-issue.
>you are effectively a slave to your seniorsI highly doubt any of them are huge dicks about it.
>youโre not going to get any intense coaching until you demonstrate that your stablemaster is going to get some return off you. Until then, youโre on your ownWhat coaching could they possibly need at that point? And sekitori give tips to lower ranked guys all the time. The Futagoyama guys do it quite a bit.
>you canโt drive a carA lot of Japanese people don't drive.
>you canโt have a girlfriendYes you can lmao.
>you canโt wear normal clothesYes you can lmao. Whether you have to always wear robes in public is at the stable's discretion.
>you canโt get a haircutThis is the pettiest non-issue I've ever heard lmaooo
>>235493Anon, you need to get back to reality. Most people don't even go to the gym regularly, let alone want to be a professional athlete. Even in that small segment of society that has the desire to go into sports as a career, only a tiny minority of those has any interest in sumo wrestling. There are 120 million people in Japan and only ~600 rikishi. You can pointlessly try and argue that the reasons people give for not wanting to be rikishi are actually invalid, as if people don't know what they want, or you can accept that sumo is and always will be a very niche interest.
>>235494They don't want to be rikishi because the lifestyle isn't being advertised to them constantly the same way being a Youtuber is by the smartphones that are plastered to their faces 24/7. The JSA could do something about that by pushing for more beyaslop to reach out to youngsters but they won't because Hakkaku is a faggot who thinks kissing government ass will save sumo.
>>235495They don't want to be rikishi because it sucks. Most Japanese boys don't become Youtubers either, they get normal jobs and have normal lives instead of joining professional sumo. That's how things have always been. Sumo wrestlers have never been common.
>>235496Again you're saying it sucks when you yourself are not a rikishi and have never been a rikishi.
>>235497I know that a lot of jobs suck despite never have done them. I wouldn't want to work as a meat packer or a toilet cleaner either. People avoid certain jobs because they're unappealing, and currently, all but 600 young men in Japan are avoiding sumo because it's unappealing. Are you a rikishi? Why not?
>>235493>>hope you pick a stable you like, because you canโt ever change>Literally a non-issue.How many of Hakuhoโs deshi have left sumo? Itโs none, by now, I think?
>I like my stable, good bunch of guys >whatโs this? A new rikishi? I bet heโll fit right in!>Oh no, this kid is psychotic and, because heโs higher up on the banzuke than me, I canโt say shit.
>>235498I was never presented with any opportunities to get into any sports when I was younger, and only learned about sumo in my 30s.
>>235500So you're talking absolute shit then, OK.
>>235499Anon, half of the old Miyagino stable left during Hakuho's suspension. Lots of them quit within weeks.
>>235500>in my 30s.Oh, so youโre just a bitchy, bitter old man.
All of a sudden your posts make way more sense.
>>235499>Itโs none, by now, I think?lol, meant to write โnineโ.
>>235500>The youngsters should join the army and fight for my political causes!>They just should, OK!>No, I'm not going to join, I'm going to sit at home and watch them get blown to bits.You're more of a boomer than Hakkaku is.
>>235498>all but 600 young men in Japan are avoiding sumo because it's unappealingHow many rikishi were there at the height of sumo? Like in the 80s/90s? I donโt think it ever topped 1000.
>>235505So go to the sumo school at the kokugikan and "save" the youngsters since you clearly know what they want better than they do
Im sure they'll enjoy the incoherent shrieking of a virtue signaling wagie
>>235501From what I've seen the lifestyle really doesn't seem all that bad, that's all I'm saying. Free rent, free utilities, free food. Those are some ridiculous perks. Physical training isn't a big deal, I go to the gym and lift weights. I bet you're unemployed.
>>235507>wagieYouโre telling on yourself, you unemployed loser.
>>235509And yet I am not a neet. See if you can figure it out, big brain.
>>235506The most ever was 943 in 1994, when Takanohana was one of the most recognized celebrities in Japan.
>>235510That means you're a student, aka too young to have a fully developed brain yet. You really shouldn't be giving out opinions when you're functionally retarded you know.
>>235508The free room and board a rikishi gets is the same as the free room and board a child gets. You eat what your dad puts on the table for you. You get a room in your dad's house which you have to share with your siblings. If you want to do anything, you have to ask your dad's permission. When you go to the gym, you go because you want to. You go at a time that's convenient to you and you train in the way that you want to. You're your own boss. Most people prefer the autonomous decision-making and freedom to do as they please that being an adult allows you, even if they do have to pay the price for that and work a job to fund their lifestyle. Most people aren't prepared to live like a sumo wrestler does, even if they do get free food.
>>235512He already admitted heโs over thirty. If heโs that old and not a neet, it means heโs receiving government disability assistance. Probably explains his shitty disposition.
>>235513>Most people>Most people>Most peopleHow many rikishi does sumo need exactly? If just 1 in every 100,000 kids became a rikishi the sport would be swamped. "Most people" aren't a factor in this. If the JSA can't scrape just a couple hundred extra youngsters from across the entirety of Japan, they're simply doing a dogshit job. Hakkaku is doing a dogshit job.
>But he's kissing ass and not having any scandals!That won't magically make good things happen.
>>235514Yeah I've found that people who don't work or have kids tend to be complete wretches. "I'm a piece of shit who brings the world down and there's nothing you can do about it!" tends to be the angle they shoot for to get their "wins" in life.
>>235511>The most ever was 943 in 1994, when Takanohana was one of the most recognized celebrities in Japan.Thatโs less than I would have thought.
>>235515Then the JSA has always been doing a dogshit job. Osaka Sumo and all the other pre-unification groups were also doing dogshit jobs. In all of Japanese history, nobody has ever done a less than dogshit job at getting youths interested in sumo. Hundreds, maybe thousands of men. Glorious yokozunas and skilled PR men, brand ambassadors and community outreach gurus. None of them have ever managed to make sumo significantly more popular than it was in the 90s. Does this seem reasonable to you? Do you really think that not just Hakkaku, but every chairman and authority figure involved in sumo for all of history has been incompetent? That none of the people working for the JSA are as smart and good at problem solving as you are? Face facts. The problem is with sumo, not with sumo's management.
>conflate multiple anons
>feel superior to this non-existent person you've constructed in your head
It's so pathetic I almost didnt want to point it out lol
Embarrassing
>>235517Youtube is an incredible way to reach out to youngsters that isn't being fully taken advantage of. That's my point.
>>235448to belabor the point, I started to look at whether or not the current makuuchi roster had meaningful success or expectations of success before entering the NSK. I only made it like halfway through before I got bored, but this is what I have:
-Aonishiki took "3rd at the 2019 Sumo world junior championships in Sakai in middle weight"
-Wakamotoharu, Wakatakakage - grandchildren of komusubi Wakabayama
-Ichiyamamoto finished top 16 in the 2016 National Sports Festival
-Shishi took multiple bronze medals (2014-15) in the ISF's Sumo World Championship
-Hakuoho - Hakuho Cup winner, 2-time high school yokozuna, Corporate Yokozuna etc
-Midorifuji won the 2013 All-Japan junior championships for his weight division.
-Takerufuji "Individual runner-up at several national events"
-Tochitaikai won the 2014 National Middle School Sumo Championship
-Churanoumi won the 2010 Junior World Championship and the 2011 National Sports Festival
-Kinbozan was runner-up in the 2019 All-Japan Sumo Championship, winner of 2020 National Student Sumo Championship
-Ura won the under-65kg division at the 2008(?) National Student Sumo Championship
-Kayo finished top 8 in the 2021 All-Japan Sumo Championship
-Oshoma was student yokozuna, Kanazawa National Tournament winner etc
-Onosato - obvious
-Daieisho was a semifinalist of the 2011 National Inter-High tournament
-Endo won the 2012 All-Japan Sumo Championship and the 2012(?) National Sports Festival
-Tobizaru won a late-2000s National Middle School Sumo Championship; couldn't find the year
>>235516That was during the "literally torture 15 year olds to death" era. Imagine the number if Takanohana's popularity had come now
>>235519The JSA is getting better at YouTube, Hakkaku (and the rest of the board) just wants to make sure that the videos donโt make the rikishi look foolish.
>guys having fun while training?Fine
>guys enjoying a communal meal?Fine
>one video after another of supposed โprofessional athletes โ doing nothing but gorging themselves?Guys, thereโs more to the sport than thisโฆ
>>235522What if they were having fun gorging themselves?
>>235521If Onosato and Hoshoryu develop a compelling rivalry, I bet weโll see numbers increase.
>>235519They don't want a load of useless eaters who show up just to try the chanko, or perverts signing up to try and sniff the okami-san. They don't want to deal with a revolving door of teenagers joining, becoming quickly disillusioned by the fact that real stable life isn't as good as the Youtube propaganda made it seem. Realistically, many stables lack the infrastructure to deal with multiple new recruits - if sumo returned to Takanohana-era numbers, it would be equivalent to every stable taking on half again as many men as they currently have. It's better for everyone if the only people who join sumo are people who genuinely love sumo and are motivated to try and succeed. That sort of person doesn't need to watch parasocial beyaslop to get interested in sumo. In fact, I'd wager quite a lot of money that the majority of the beyaslop audience is comprised of women.
>>235524Onosato alone is going to bring in a good few youngsters. He ticks all the boxes
>Japanese>Already more yusho than K*senosato>Literally never lowered in rank once in his entire career
>>235443nabatame and kuwae are half, they have japanese nationality. Roga doesn't.
Nabatame being half Thai does explain some things...
>>235524I'm already compelled
July is going to be hype
>>235540What, Covid boosters?
>>235542Those are clearly blood draws, /pol/tard.
>>235545Why so aggressive? Anon was just wondering what's being done.
>>235546All rikishi have mandatory blood tests as part of a physical twice(?) a year.
>>235548I know that, you know that. We didn't always know that, though.
>>235549Fuck off with your false naivete.
>>235550>I think everyone else is disingenuous because I am disingenuousparanoia is the price you pay for being dishonest
>>235551I think you're a cunt. End of story.
>>235545Huh? What's wrong with getting additional layers of protection against a deadly disease?
>Blood has to come out of the body to make room for the vaccine
>>235552You clearly think everyone's a cunt, because me and that Anon are two different people, and the guy you were attacking in the first place is a third. If you smell shit everywhere you walk, check your own shoes.
>>235558Did you buy a book of aphorisms recently or something? Do me a favor and choke on it, faggot.
>>235559I think you could do with buying a book on anger management. Whatever's causing you so much frustration in your personal life has nothing to do with me or anyone else in this thread, and impotently lashing out isn't going to make you feel better.
>two days in a row with no Chris video
>>235561>has nothing to do with meAnd yet you keep replying... You replied to a conversation that had nothing to do with you. And as was said, there are at least three other Anons in play here. So why join in on something you clearly find so distasteful? As long as you keep adding wood to the fire, I will keep burning this mother down until there is nothing left. Count on it.
>>235563You chose to be needlessly aggressive to someone when it was nothing to do with you. You don't care if people are replying to you or talking amongst themselves, because you're feeling angry and edgy and want us all to know about it. You can scream and shout and get as riled up as you like, all you're doing is making yourself look stupid.
>>235565And all you're doing is wasting your own time trying to pretend like you have the moral high ground on 4chan.
>>235566And you're wasting your time ranting at strangers. If you think time-wasting is so silly and pointless, you can just stop whenever you like.
>>235569I'm only ranting because they ranted first. Stop pretending you care, and I'll stop talking at you.
>>235568When's the last time it was released on June 30th in a given year???
>>235570You're the only one that's been ranting since the guy who thinks Hakkaku isn't handling beyaslop properly.
>>235574Incorrect. I said a few sentences then some guy who thinks he's the next Emerson started writing paragraphs. The ranting started on the other side.
>I post a sumo image and leave the thread for a couple hours
>dumbfucks shitpost back and forth forever
ไปๆนใใชใ
>>235575Writing paragraphs? Are you sure you haven't just wandered into the wrong thread?
>235578
If you're not even going to try anymore, you don't get a (You).
>>235578>>235579Just kiss already
More like "touches-guys-yama"
>>235582Where did you find this picture of me???
>>235582>is wanted for questioning by the police regarding multiple instances of chikan
Sweat falls, the dohyo
cracks, the heat of the summer
cooks the /sumo/ thread
>>235588The sweat falls from them,
Daieisho thrusts his best slaps,
Yet his hands slide off.
>>235589With his new tsuna,
Onosato yearns to reign,
Yet Nephew wins.
>>235591A single battle
lost means nothing when the war
and yusho are won
As summer heat breaks,
The beast weakens so.
He fails this July.
As summer heat breaks,
Anew, the beast weakens so.
He fails this July.
>derp
Abi seeks eighth win
We all know it will happen
Hatakikomi
>>235475>Says person who isn't a sumo wrestler.What's your shikona and rank?
>>235482>Again, most youngsters who get into MMA just get brain damage and retire in irrelevance.So completely the same as rikishi then.
https://h10.cs.nii.ac.jp/view4/video_view.php?fileName=ste98af3702a058bda6e017fb1429ce15d
Four minutes of mostly tobikomi-style amateur sumo (student sumo?) at the Toyama Military Academy, 1923.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_94idWEfWHs&t=293s
March 10th, 1929 - For Armed Forces Day, commemorating the 1905 decisive Japanese triumph over the Russians at the Battle of Mukden, the makuuchi gang are given the occasion to perform for Emperor Hirohito.
After yokozuna Miyagiyama's dohyoiri, we get four unidentified bouts, then Noshirogata vs Onosato, Shinobuyama vs Miyagiyama, and finally Onosato vs Shinobuyama. Who will win?
>>235515>the JSA can't scrape just a couple hundred extra youngsters from across the entirety of Japan, they're simply doing a dogshit job. Hakkaku is doing a dogshit job.That's true, the way to do it is to encourage sumo in schools and stuff like that, more clubs.
I need my Futagoyama slop
Being geisha or sumo wrestler seem pretty similar
>>235617>Being geisha or sumo wrestler seem pretty similarThe only major difference is where Onosato puts the sake bottle.
>>235618Onosato literally was not involved in that in any way, shape, or form. I wish you libelous fuckstains would get that through your thick fucking skulls.
>>235633How dare people tell jokes about Onosato! I must protect my precious baby boy from the meanie butts on the internet!
>>235633Onosato was the culprit of that hazing where he forced some 17 year old to get blackout drunk. That's where the connection is coming from. It's a joke.
>>235635You can't even present what you know honestly. It wasn't forced and the kid didn't black out. You LITERALLY made that shit up out of thin fucking air.
Your jokes are shit, just like your souls.
>>235638>it wasn't forcedHow many 17 year old Japanese boys do you think have the balls to say no to a senpai that's built like a brick shithouse?
>the kid didn't black outBlackout drunk is a figure of speech used to describe intense intoxication. Do you often have trouble with figurative language and taking things too literally? Get tested for autism.
>>235641>nooooo I didn't mean what I saidDidn't know I was talking to a woman. Explains a lot.
>>235646OK, you don't need to get tested. Just show up at the welfare office and ask for your autism bucks, I'm sure they'll be nice to you.
>>235638>It wasn't forced and the kid didn't black out. You LITERALLY made that shit up out of thin fucking air.Sorry, are you retarded or are you just a simp?
>>235649You really are a simp. That's kind of sad.
>if you don't make up bullshit rumors to insult people you're a simpI heard that
>>235649 likes to suck and fuck homeless men. Only charges a dollar each because he loves it so much.
I think I preferred it when 4chan was down
>>235653Are you one of Onosato's Twitch mods?
>>235635>17 year oldIt was Soseizan, who was 19 during the incident. Still illegal in Japan, I suppose.
>forced...blacked outClaimed by Daily Shincho (lol) and isn't consistent with any other tabloid that reported on this incident. Their only proof is a claim from one Nishonoseki supporter.
>>235654nobody posted in the sumo thread on the 'arty
>>235674Gods be praised. I can't even begin to imagine what would happen if those barbarians got into sumo.
>>235661Sankei, a 'legitimate' source, ran a column with a bit suggesting that they aren't stupid enough to uncritically believe the party line.
You also ought to recall that sumo journalism is textbook access journalism, and the "good" papers don't publish anything damaging unless it's already public or they get the all-clear from their sources.
>>235688so they have a japanese schizo who presumes he can see into the brain of onosato & nihonoseki publishing articles for them, what does that prove?
>>235694Just stop dude. You've been authoritatively smacked down with the original Japanese sources. Go and find something else to argue about.
>>235695>authoritativelyThere you go making shit up again
>>235702I haven't posted in this argument before. Why are there so many lunatics in this general that assume everyone who disagrees with them is the same person?
>See two people fighting
>Jump into the fray
>Get hit
>Wonder why
You're fucking retarded.
>Have to wait until the 13th for the 'sho to start
I'm not gonna make it bros...
>>235702Don't bother trying to engage in rational discussion with schizos, they aren't capable of it
>>235695>You've been authoritatively smacked down
>>235705>two peopleThere you go again. It's only you and me here, isn't it?
>>235709You just did the same thing, dipshit.
>>235710That's one of your posts.
Only two people post in /sumo/. (You) and me.
Across the dohyo
There is a lone opponent
but it's only you
https://news.yahoo.co.jp/articles/9afcf025cdfae25f078d6f70b857fe43067525f0
>Kotokantetsu's lawyer: Has a senior rikishi ever committed power harassment against a junior rikishi in your heya?
>Kotonowaka Senior: No, never.
>Lawyer: Then, is it correct that you're saying there has never been an instance of power harassment or bullying in your heya?
>Kotonowaka Sr: That's right.
>Lawyer: How long has it been since you took ownership of the heya?
>Kotonowaka Sr: ... Around 20 years.
>Lawyer: And, in that time, you have had no knowledge of a single instance of anything that would constitute power harassment or bullying in your heya.
>Kotonowaka Sr: That's correct.
despite all his accomplishments, hakuho never received a trophy from the leader of the free world while asanoyama did, so who is really the goat?
>>235738Trump asked if he could hand the trophy to Asanoyama specifically out of all rikishi.
>I'm somewhat of a pussy grabber myself
>>235718You really should've posted punished_zak.jpg with this.
July shall soon come,
The beyasloppa will cease,
There's naught we can do.
>>235725Always bet on nothing.
https://www.jiji.com/sp/article?k=2025062701003&g=spo
1
md5: 76221ed72e4cac4ff1819d8f6af5ee86
๐
>>235772Yeah, I saw. He suggested on twitter that he's considering appealing the verdict, but ehhh, even he doesn't sound that enthusiastic about it.
>>235773He should have complained directly to Sadogatake's rivals and enemies. Taking it to the courts makes the whole JSA look bad, and they're forced to close ranks.
>>235774>He should have complained directly to Sadogatake's rivals and enemiesWhat would that do?
Kotonowaka's Matrix match against Asashoryu was absolute kino.
>Dogshit gyoji call
>Monoii'd into a torinaoshi
>Asashoryu wins it
>>235777https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CWYkO2LeMY
>>235778>Clearly incorrect gyoji call>Clearly incorrect shinpan call>Wins anywayNephew is a bitch compared to this shit.
When is the Sadogatake sloppa with rotten meat chanko
Kotozakura,
Feasting on rotten chanko,
Knows only the shits.
>Takasoga is home to not only Asakoryu, but also the pussy slayer himself, Asanoyama
God I can't wait for them to start putting out real sloppa.
What are your feelings about Abi?
Why is he so controversial?
>>235791Chaos is as chaos does. I rate him.
>>235791how does he keep winning with that style of sumo
it's astounding that he's so successful with it, I think
>>235783what's takasoga?
btw there's also Kunio, ishizaki, osanai
Loosen your belts, boys. Sloppaday is here.
>>235807https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fE7HHeD1M90&ab_channel=%E4%BA%8C%E5%AD%90%E5%B1%B1%E9%83%A8%E5%B1%8Bsumofood
Right on cue.
>>235816Where did you get that picture of me?
I wish they would bring back money penalty for intentional matta
>>235822>intentionalThey'd just argue that their matta wasn't intentional. If you allow exceptions, everyone will claim them.
>>235824You can claim a hairpull is accidental too, but you're not the one who decides if a foul has occurred. It'd be down to the judges' discretion whether any given matta was intentional or not.
>>235826That's not the same thing though. All hairpulls are treated the same regardless of whether they meant to do it or not. If you want to introduce punishments for mattas, all mattas need to be punished equally. The issue then is that mattas aren't one sided and people will just intentionally not start to get their opponent punished.
>>235832>Zak's face on the last frame
>>235840The judges call it as they will. I've seen rikishi get away with fairly obvious ones (from the camera's perspective) and I've seen the slightest hook with an outstretched pinkie cost men matches. The judges make their choice and the rikishi must abide by it. If a rule was introduced that banned or penalised "intentional" mattas, then it would be up to the judges to decide whether any given matta was intentional or not. It wouldn't be 100% fair, but that would be in keeping with all the other things that judges arbitrate on. How many times have you seen a man robbed in a mono-ii?
>>235815New disciple has good form!
But starting his career with two shoulder surgeries? I don't know bro
>>235841Thanks, got a new reaction image
>The new banzuke, or sumo wrestling ranking list, for the July 2025 tournament (Nagoya Basho) will be released on Monday, June 23rd, 2025. Banzuke are typically released two Mondays before the tournament begins. The Nagoya tournament starts on July 13th, making June 23rd the relevant date.
"AI" is so fucking useless holy shit. It's confidently wrong all the time.
>>235849I actually went and double checked, and the date it gives is 3 Mondays before the basho starts, while it clearly states the banzuke drops 2 Mondays before. How anyone believes these lie machines is beyond me.
>>235849I just searched "when does the july banzuke come out" and none of the top five results had an answer. The first correct result was some guy's blog. I think this is less of an issue with AI, and more with the fact that English information about sumo is scattered around a multitude of small websites and random Reddit posts, and you have to essentially know exactly what you're looking for before you search.
>>235852just another example why this so-called AI is shit. it's basically super fast google on roids. it's not AI, but catalogue service.
>>235853It's not shit. Even with its current limitations, even if it is just Google on steroids, a nerd from 10 years ago would have sold his own mother just to spend five minutes messing around with it. I grew up using things like DOS and Windows 95, and being able to just query a computer using natural language feels like sci-fi to me, even if the answers aren't all that good yet.
>>235852Weird, I just typed the exact same question as before and got
>The new banzuke, or sumo ranking list, is typically released on the Monday 13 days before the start of the next tournament. For the July tournament, which begins on July 13th, the banzuke will be released on Monday, June 30th, 2025So now it's correct?
>>235855>even if the answers aren't all that good yetThe answers are the only significant part. Any machine can output "natural language" in response to your input; it just won't be relevant or accurate. These new things are only designed to be capable of making their responses seem relevant.
>>235857It's unfair to act as if everything a modern AI agent spits out is irrelevant or inaccurate. They do have some major flaws (as any new things do) but in general they're good enough for basic assistance. The more you understand about their limitations, the more effectively you can make use of them. I wouldn't use one as a full replacement for a highly skilled professional, but they've already made traditional search engines more or less obsolete and they're already capable of generating letters and presentations and articles to a reasonable standard. If they never got any better than they currently are, they'd still be a massively important thing to have. The thing is, they are going to keep getting better, because even such a flawed and basic version is so popular and useful. I am unreservedly pro-AI in all its forms and I look forward to seeing how good they get in my lifetime, it's like being around when the first personal computers hit the market.
>>235861The single biggest problem with AI is that it can be wrong. You have no idea how many people out there regurgitate whatever an AI tells them as if it's gospel truth.
>>235864I'm more familiar with that than I'd like. I've personally seen a man go off the deep end into pretty serious mental health problems as a direct result of over-reliance on an AI yes-man, and it was harrowing. Unfortunately, I think that's a problem with people that can't be solved by improving the technology. We're all really just monkeys and some proportion of us is always going to be incapable of dealing with new things in a sane and sensible manner.
>>235867I actually read a piece about that recently you might find interesting.
https://alexberenson.substack.com/p/the-newest-artificial-intelligence
The tl;dr is that in order to keep users hooked and engaged, LLMs are basically turning into compliment machines. Truth is becoming irrelevant.
1951. Maedayama in America, performing his dohyouiri in a boxing ring because they didn't have a dohyou.
>>235868I think that it's more that truth is already irrelevant for great swathes of the internet's population. Everything exists to be consumed here and now, and by the time you digest it and wonder about its veracity or its authorship, it has already passed into ancient history. If people weren't already craving yes-men and slop, there'd be no market for it.
>>235871"Truth" doesn't exist for entertainment; it exists to win arguments.
>>235872And those arguments are for the purpose of entertainment. No one on twitter is winning the hearts and minds of their enemy.
>>235872I'm surprised there isn't an AI bot specifically designed to help you win online slapfights.
>>235874When you say slapfights, could you possibly be referring to... fatslapfights???
>>235875Don't be silly, we don't talk about that kind of thing here. This is /argu/.
>>235843Mita also came fresh off a surgery. Basically put off a year to heal.
Google isn't supposed to give you answers, it's supposed to show you where they are. For future reference, just go here, lol.
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnTicket/year_schedule/
>>235881New arena for Nagoya basho, right?
>>235882Yes, the basho will be the arena's first event.
Can't wait for fantasy ozumo to open up in two days. Onosato and Hoshoryu are both free real estate, as is Takerufuji now that he's no longer joi and most likely around the M8 mark. Aonishiki is a suicidal pick at this point; his record against sanyaku thus far has been pathetic and there's no reason that would change. Hiradoumi might be a sweet pick since he's out of the joi for the first time since January 2024, same with Ura who maths out at M10 which he's well above.
Next basho is gonna be complete chaos while Nephew and Onosake clean up lmao. I really hope WTK and Kirishima can keep their Ozeki runs going. Kotozakura is a disgrace to the rank right now. I hope he kyujos day one and just heals up. Nobody wants to see him bounce between 8-7 and 5-10 until intai.
>>235886Fantasy is a great place to see who actually knows what they're talking about. Last time I finished 50th, and about 30th the time before, out of around 370.
>>235884Dan will be dan, he will be substantially more muscular and heavier than in the previous basho, same as always. Everyone will again say "this time he must've finally reached a rank that is so high that he is bound to put up a MK" and they will all be wrong again. Look for another double digit performance from him followed by another boring interview containing the phrase "my style of sumo"
>>235890>Fantasy is a great place to see who actually knows what they're talking about>>235891
>>235892 Dan is going to get dumpstered in July. His record against the sanyaku is terrible. He's just a smaller Takerufuji who lucked his way into the upper ranks.
>>235891atamifuji so enthralled with dan's performance that he actually opened his eyes
>>235897Crazy, usually he only opens his eyes for chanko.
What if a sumo wrestler didn't use his own style of sumo though? What if he used someone else's style?
>>235901>What if he used someone else's style?We take him out to karaoke.
>>235924That gyoji knows his judo well.
>>235890That's nice, I finished first place on my second attempt.
>>235918Hey I've seen that tiger before.
file
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ALL HAIL FLYING ONOSUCKO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxP2eq9_YRg
>>235944lame, they should've used this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVp2HE6igS0
UAAAH I CAN'T STOP SLOPPING UOOOOOOH
file
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>>235973is denuma balding in reverse?
>>235978The rest of his head is probably the same, it's just hidden by the topknot.
>>235944>h*shoesryu didn't get a drone showOH NONONONO MONGORUSISTERS HOW DO WE COPE??
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbuvhig3_Nk
Make room boys!
>>235973>japanese children can go to a sumo stable for work experience during schoolI wish we had this in America
>>236027Set up your own sumo stable and invite all the local children.
>>235944>Hoshoryu ropesHere's your rope, gaijin.
>Onosato ropesDAY OF NATIONAL CELEBRATION
The JSA are weebs.
>Ohhh Nippon rich ancient culture!
Literally no one else in Japan gives a fuck.
>You will never be a gluttonous alcoholic and wave goodbye to your fans on the outro of beyasloppa
Why even live...
>>236033THIS KIND OF BEHAVIOUR DOESN'T FOLLOW OFFICAL NSK SLOPPA GUIDANCE SYSTEM. NO DIGNITY
>>236034Now imagine what sort of things go on in the stables without Youtube channels.
>>236034You clearly haven't seen the other sloppa outro they've been doing lately.
>Leave a comment on a sloppa channel saying their outro English is bad and give a better example
>They actually replied and said they'll use it
Now I just feel bad for being critical.
>>236038International feedback is important if you want to cater to international fans.
>>236040And make it smaller. I want to see bloated angels dance on the head of a clay pin.
BANZUKE OUT!
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/
>>236048>Enho at Ms10Can he do it? Will he die?
>>236049Makushita and below were still on the May banzuke when you made that post. Enho is now Ms16 after a 3-4 record; losses to Inami and Asahakuryu were hard-fought if I remember correctly, but his loss to Nobehara was underwhelming.
>>236048>Takayasu>K1e to K1w on 6-9Is this the first time in a literal fucking century that a 6-9 at K/S hasn't resulted in dropping down to Maegashira? Did they really want to keep Daniel out of the Sanyaku so badly that they straight up rewrote the rules? That's actually fucking nuts.
Also Wakaikari is now Fujinokawa.
Dan mortal lock for at least two kinboshi before he make sanyaku his permanent home.
>>236051This banzuke is full of bullshit. Kayo and Miyanokaze somehow didn't get demoted. ShiSHIT is still in makuuchi at M17w
>>236055Due to the sanyaku increasing to 8 fatsos, technically every Maegashira got slapped with an extra -0.5 demotion.
>>236048'zuna 'sato on the 'zuke
>>236067stop posting like that
>>236051They're just giving the lad a chance to score some kinboshi before his inevitable rise to yokozuna.
>>236073imagine if dan beats them both in the regular tournament and then ends up in a 3 way playoff against them and beats both yokers again
4 kinboshi
>>236079It would be kino, but that's not how that works.
>>236079>4 kinboshiHas anyone ever got that many one basho before?
M1e - absolute top of the maegashira ranks - Ukrainian
M17w - absolute bottom of the maegashira ranks - Ukrainian
A basic interpolation from this data would inevitably presume that everyone else in the maegashira ranks is also Ukrainian, but in reality none of them are. Just goes to show you how stupid statisticians are.
>>236083No, and furthermore no maegashira has ever scored a playoff win against a yokozuna before so there's no precedent as to whether or not it'd be an official kinboshi.
>>236084No statistician would make a statement based on only two data points
>>236079>3 way playoff>dan beats onosato>get kinboshi>lose to hoshoryu>hoshoryu jobs to onosato>onosato vs dan>dan wins>repeat ad infinitum infinite kinboshi exploit?
>>236087Winning in a playoff is not a kinboshi.
>>236088>>236089We don't know for sure because it's never happened.
However, wins in the playoffs are not counting for official win totals for the purpose of mochikyukin, so for example someone with a 13-2 and 2-0 in playoff is counted as 11 wins over losses, not 13. And since kinboshi are relevant mainly for the bonus to the mochikyukin, it's unlikely that a playoff win would count. But again, it hasn't happened before.
>>236089Ketteisen bouts aren't even counted as official career bouts; they're not going to randomly make an exception.
Aonishiki will never beat either Yokozuna so this is a ridiculous hypothetical anyway
>wake up
>Takayasu stays at K1
Eh?
>>236108Due to the expansion of the Sanyaku, K1w currently sits at the spot in the rankings where M1e has been for a while. That's the only justification for this, plus they probably didn't want Dan rising way too fast.
tl;dr it's WTK's fault
Ive come to laugh at the Dan fags that thought he was going right to sanyaku.
>>236116This is the first time in modern sumo that a K/S that went 6-9 has remained in the Sanyaku. They literally rewrote the rules to deny him that slot. I can certainly see why they did it (Takayasu being punished enough already, Dan being a new kid, WTK forcing a 3rd S slot meaning K1w is now where M1e was last basho), but don't act like anyone actually saw this coming.
>>236118There aren't any rules. Every "generation" of the banzuke committee has their own ideas on how to interpret common, uncommon, and rare banzuke scenarios. In recent years, the current incarnation of the committee has tended to opt for underdemotion instead of overpromotion (Nishikifuji being a notable top division example), so it shouldn't be quite as unexpected as you're making it out to be. Overpromotion and underdemotion are both perfectly valid ways to solve the banzuke.
>>236118all these mental gymnastics to dodge the obvious: russian interference in the banzuke just like they fixed the 2016 US election
>>236118I saw this coming
Literally nobody likes the danfag or his hero
>>236118>don't act like anyone actually saw this comingme, i knew he wouldn't get it. i was right
>>236125how come dan rustles your jimmies so badly? dan is just out there doing his style of sumo, I don't see whats so potentially offensive about that
>>236127Bit thick, are we?
Where are my redditards yelling about Jap racism after Aonishiki getting screwed on this banzuke. If this was a mongol you wouldn't hear the end of it. Pic unrelated.
>>236130The Hakuho debacle finally proved, even to Reddit, that JSA racism is the immune system of sumo and shouldn't be complained about. Foreigners must work harder to be treated equally, and even then you have to keep an eye on them.
>>236112If Wakatakakoga wins 12 again and gets promoted to ozeki then putting him in that awkward S2 slot is forgivable.
>>236120>There aren't any rules.Sure there are.
- makuuchi must be 42 in number
- there must be at least two each ozeki (or yokozuna-ozeki), sekiwake, and komusubi
Thereโs a bunch of rules. The thing that danfans are screeching about is called a guideline.
>>236134Didn't one of the lower divisions have its size changed a few years ago?
>>236135Rules can be formally changed. Guidelines are even looser because they aren't formally a thing to begin with.
>>236113>mongolians are always scratching each other's b-ACK!!
k
md5: df3b782d2bd3c4748a872a7c86554c80
๐
>>236132>then putting him in that awkward S2 slot is forgivable"Forgivable" isn't even part of the conversation. They had to give him sekiwake, that's one of the harder guidelines.
k
md5: b6d021993355b2dc3751a64ea9cc6aa7
๐
>>236132>then putting him in that awkward S2 slot is forgivable"Forgivable" isn't even part of the conversation. They had to give him sekiwake, that's one of the harder guidelines.
Regardless of what they'd done, there would have been something either unprecedented or essentially unprecedented.
>>236150Why isn't there a Big Banzuke Book that lays out autistically precise rules for what should be done in any given situation?
https://x.com/BURGERKINGJAPAN/status/1939534410115903605
JSA hard at work
>>236151Because it's effectively impossible to account for literally all circumstances unless they do something like make an official Elo system.
>>236152I can't believe they forced Takakeisho to slim down just so they could fatten him up for an ad campaign.
>>236153>Assign concrete up and down values to each possible rank/record combination>Define criteria for tie-breaking when two or more men calculate to the same position>Properly define things like an ozeki run and what must be achieved to force an additional san'yaku spotWhat's missing?
>>236156Hinkaku can't be accounted for, sumo is a religion, not a sport. Sorry if that upsets you
>>236151Because rikishi can't read.
>>236157>sumo is a religion, not a sporthttps://www.sumo.or.jp/IrohaKnowledge/sumo_history/
>>236157Sure it can.
>If a rikishi is Japanese, he takes precedence over a FILTHY GAIJIN in all promotion ties
>>236156There are 42 makuuchi rikishi fighting 15 bouts a basho. Assuming all are healthy and there are no bouts with juryo visitors that means 315 total makuuchi bouts per basho and 66,749,594,872,528,400,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 possible outcomes for each basho. It's impossible to create a single system that accounts for all of them without making it a computerized Elo-style system.
>>236164All that matters for banzuke calculation is the final score - M10W will always have some value between 0-15 and 15-0, and you can reasonably say that each of those potential scores has a given promotion/demotion value. Then you just need a simple algorithm to determine whether a 9-6 at M10W should take precedence over an 8-7 at M9W, and so on. The system should then be able to handle any of the gazllions of potential outcomes.
>>236156Why do so many people want to change the way things are done?
>>236166Invention and refinement is the core of the human spirit.
>>236168That's up to the people involved though, not the people watching.
>>236166They think it will give their life meaning
>>236165The flaw with this method is assuming all victories and defeats are equal, which is something the rankings committee likely doesn't believe in. If one M5 is alternating wins and losses such that they're only fighting other maegashira, while the other M5 wins all their early matches against maegashira and get put up against sanyaku where they struggle, so they end up with the same score at the end of the basho, should they really be treated equally even though the former struggled against other maegashira while the latter beat all the maegashira and only struggled against higher competition that the former didn't face? You'll probably say "yes" but the rankings committee believes otherwise, which is exactly why they don't have hard rules like that.
>>236151Same reason there aren't really any books that lay out what moves to make in chess midgame. You just follow guidelines and deal with weird situations as best you can when they appear.
>>236173Bro we already had another thread up
>>236174You don't need to treat all wins and losses as equal, and as you said, they don't. Clearly, they assign a higher weight to more "difficult" wins, and that can quite easily be formalised. If a win is worth 1 rank of promotion, a win against a man who outranks you can be worth 1.1, or 1.5, or 2.
>>236177Ignore the Danfag and move to that one:
>223480
>>234480>>234480>>234480>>234480>>234480This is the new thread
Has been up since this one was made
>>236180The danfag guy is fucking insufferable
How can he not take a fucking hint
>>236183It's a Russian bot aiming to make us hate Ukraine, of course.
>>236150>m9, m10, m11, m12...m18disgusted shodai.jpg
>>236150For future reference, you can list ranks in a range instead of typing them all out individually. For example, M9-M18. This works for ranks further up and down, for example S-M4, or M12-J6 and so on.
