Thread 232989

Kisenosato Edition

>Banzuke:
http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspx
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/

>Fight Schedule & Results:
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/

>Some sumo links and how to watch live:
https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d

>Beya Youtube channels:
>Futagoyama
https://www.youtube.com/@futagoyama-sumofood
>Isegahama
https://www.youtube.com/@isegahamabeya
>Kise
https://www.youtube.com/@kisebeya
>Tatsunami
https://www.youtube.com/@tatsunami-beya
>Tamanoi
https://www.youtube.com/@sumo-tamanoibeya
>Hidenoyama
https://www.youtube.com/@hidenoyama
>Oshima
https://www.youtube.com/@oshimabeya
>Minato
https://www.youtube.com/@湊部屋どすこいチャンネル
>Shikoroyama
https://www.youtube.com/@shikoroyamabeya
>Asakayama
https://www.youtube.com/@浅香山部屋公式チャンネル
>Takasago
https://www.youtube.com/@TAKASAGOSUMOTEAM高砂部屋

Previous thread:
>>232947

I am here for the good boy thread

https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202506060001822.html
Akio Toyoda, the chairman of Toyota Motor and apparently an important supporter of Hakuhou, has been announced as a candidate for president of International Sumo Federation. Nikkan seems to believe that he will try to expand sumo's global presence if elected.

The pieces are moving into place.

the childishness on display itt is truly laughable

are you literally six years old with this tantrum? lmao

imagine actually unironically getting emotionally angry because you think a thread on /xs/ was made too soon

How to improve Sumo with a new Association.

>Surround the area by an Octagon so no one gets hurt
>Change the clothes to shorts
>Entrances with modern rap songs
>Fighters don't need to be Stoic. Backflips and Fortnite celebrations allowed.

There, got the general public to follow Sumo. Easy.

>SAY!
>MY!
>NAME!

Kusano Ozeki in one year from now.
Screencap this post.

You guys are such an embarrassment to us

I had a dream today I was browsing 4chan and somebody posted a webm of a that notoriously small sumo guy absolutely dunking on his opponent and then I replied "damn I love that little nigga like you wouldn't believe". The kicker is I don't even watch sumo, I've only seen a couple youtube highlights here and there. Is this a sign that I need to start watching?

>>234413
Now is a great time to start watching. We have two new yokozuna who are young and (relatively) injury-free. They look poised to do even greater things than what they've already accomplished. There's also a fair amount of prospects who are coming into their own while the old guard is filtering out.

>>234413
Damn I love all my little niggas like you wouldn't believe.

>>234007
Dan will make it before he does. Also LMAO when Dan destroys Daieisho, Wakatakakoga & Kirishitma's ozeki runs next 'sho and starts his own

>>234480
>>234480
>>234480
>>234480
RIP Masuiyama

>>234481
Damn, he was born on the same day as my grandfather.

>>233878
>私の名前
Is that his shikona???

>>234490
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO1Cs8UqMCw
Masuiyama beating Kitanofuji, Mienoumi, Chiyonofuji, Takanosato, Wajima

>Futagoyama sloppa consists of training, cooking, and eating
>Tatsunami sloppa consists of training, cooking, and eating
>Meanwhile Oshima is putting out this unfathomable kino

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqh_upgoVOc&ab_channel=%E5%A4%A7%E5%B3%B6%E9%83%A8%E5%B1%8B%E3%80%90%E5%85%AC%E5%BC%8F%E3%80%91%E3%83%81%E3%83%A3%E3%83%B3%E3%83%8D%E3%83%AB%E3%80%90SUMO%E3%80%91

>>234492
Fuckin adorable, but as an ex lifeguard bits of that were hard to watch.
I can't stop thinking about that bintsuke oil in the pool as well. Massive water park so it doesn't really matter though.

>>234493
>I'm Yokozuna so I get the unicorn floatie >:(
Teru is fuckin great.

>>234494
I bet it was the most majestic of all the floaties available.

>>234496
>Finally I have collected all the rubber ducks in Japan
>But at what cost?

>>234486
WE WUZ YOKOZUNA

>>234486
Hakuho? More like HakuNIGGER

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0gxl8IThDY
Someone uploaded an old special about the 1991 London koen.

>>234510
Kuroho Dayum Sumo & Basketball Corporation

>>234514
Apparently, they were all introduced under nicknames in place of their shikona?

>>234519
I hope they bring this back.

>>234514
Notice anything?

>>234525
it's a very long time ago

>>234514
this is not where I thought things would end up

>>234528
>SLOP SLOP SLOP

Takatouriki finds himself betting on the ponies. He wins his very first bet.
This is foreshadowing.

i don't think i have ever read the lifting numbers of a rikishi and found them believable. it's always like 40% higher than believable

>>234531
What, you're trying reverse psychology now?
Regardless, it turns out there's a video of this. You people who know how to count plates can tell me if it looks like 200 kg.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DFr6pY3zG3H/

>>234530
>his very first bet.
lol, that degenerate, it probably was even his first bet of the day.

>>234534
Nippon tetsu, preasu understando

>>234534
20+20+30+10+10+5+5

>>234519
i think these were nicknames given by the westerners... wakanohana had none.

>>234537
>i think these were nicknames given by the westerners
Yeah, it looks like those cards are from the British broadcast, because they're used here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6AfqCcALLc

I guess Channel 4 made them up, then?

>>234540
More like "talked to the 90's version of Chris".

>>234541
>that's konishiki, aka the dump truck. i visited his beya once and frankly i wasn't impressed. he lacks the hinkaku required of a yokozuna. they tried to recruit me, i had top division skills but i don't take orders, i would have ended up punching the oyakata in the face

>>234541
>the 90's version of Chris
aka Chris

>>234544
Which one's Chris?

lmao, did Mita threw up at 23:55

https://youtu.be/YFPJvXUNKEA?t=1437

>>234547
>>234175

>>234545
The one who clearly understands Japanese culture better.

>>234547
Vomita

>>234547
reminiscent of the first running scene in rocky, mita is 100% devoted to success in sumo unlike nabatame who just wants to spend his life on masturbation and other self centered activities.
too bad mita is a manlet and will never be able to translate his devotion to a meaningfully high rank. he might be one of those guys who gets a basho or two at komusubi and puts up double digit losses there before fading away, but even that seems a bit too much to expect of him

>>234551
Mainoumi 2.0?

>>234552
midget endo

I want fewer videos of rikishi eating slop and more videos of rikishi lifting

I wanna see Hoshoryu in a unicorn floatie.

>>234554
I want more videos of rikishi playing video games.

>>234558
Kagayaki?

chiyomaru is currently barely holding on at upper makushita

what's going on in his head? i mean he's 34 years old, does he hope to get *just* inside the salaried level for a year or two more? is it about acquiring elder stock?

what drives such a man

>>234562
100% it’s about securing a share.

>>234563
he already has more than a good enough history to qualify. he hasn't retired because he likes being a rishiki and doesn't want it to end.
and by that I mean he likes the infinite availability of free food

>>234562
This >>234565 and also to be a sort of active veteran voice in the stable. They need some young guys to step up or they're going to be out of Sekitori quite soon.

>>234565
It usually isn't about the number of basho, it's about the availability of a kabu through whichever ichimon they belong to. If he needs the kabu of someone who ages out in 2026, he's not going anywhere until then.

>>234558
Same energy

>>234562
It's entirely possible that he doesn't have any idea where he's going to earn a living after sumo. Sure, he might be hanging on for a kabu, but he might just as easily be hanging on until the supporters club finds him a job as a security guard. One thing about sumo that doesn't get the attention it ought to is the fact that a lot of these men (Chiyomaru included) join sumo instead of going to high school, and spend their entire adult lives as rikishi. If you're good enough to reach sekitori and escape chanko duty quickly, you don't even have the fallback skill of being a good chef for when your career ends. If they weren't wise enough to invest their salary smartly over the years, many of these men suddenly find themselves as middle-aged unskilled bums with rapidly dwindling savings accounts. I don't know about you, but I'd rather grind on in Makushita for a while longer than go out into the world unprepared.

>>234565
Qualifying to get a share does not automatically mean you get one. There are only 105 of them and there are only a handful of them available at any given time. If he doesn’t have one lined up when he retires, he’s out of the sumo association with no other course back in.

He’s in the Takasago ichimon and from the looks of it, there’s maybe two or three available in the next few years. He could always secure a share outside the ichimon but that’s a taller ask.

He probably has his supporters club doing their legwork to secure him funding for a share (if he hasn’t already) but until one comes up, he’s got to stay in the ring.

>>234574
Too low.

I was watching the Tochiozan retrospective on the Oyakta channel and when they started going through his old matches with him they only showed ones he lost. Thats was the whole show, he sat there for half an hour watching himself fail and the other oyakatas denigrated him for losing and he made up excuses and apologies.

>>234486
still less mutt than am*ricans.

>>234574
Disgusting. Where's the risk of permanent spinal injury? I bet you couldn't even get a concussion from hitting that tawara the wrong way. Get this pussy shit out of my sight.

>>234574
Old ruins of ancient sumo...
How many knees were obliterated in that very sacred dohyo...

>>234582
not as many; they had the hosting daimyo's retinue standing at attention and willing to stab anything that falls out of bounds with a spear
when they realized that this didn't present enough danger to the audience members as well, changes had to be made

>>234578
Humiliation ritual

>>234588
There are quite a lot of those in Japanese culture

>>234578
>>234588
>I was watching the Tochiozan retrospective on the Oyakata channel and when they started going through his old matches with him they only showed ones he lost.
>Humiliation ritual
They definitely didn't do that at all. It was an overview of matches important to him, selected by him. The losses are things like his first career bout, his first playoff loss, his first makuuchi playoff loss. They also show him winning his sandanme yusho, securing his promotion to juryo, and beating Hakuho and Kisenosato.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bqwzvhgV5A

Nothing like you described.

>>234581
The spinal injuries don't come from the falls; they come from two 400lb muscular men hitting each other with their full force over and over.

>>234600
>you won't get hurt if you fall face-first off a raised dohyo
>honest

>>234601
Stop moving and goalposts and making shit up at the same time. Show me a single instance of a rikishi faceplanting the floor when they go out. It doesn't happen because your instincts won't let it. Really low quality post from you honestly.

>>234602
There's no room to faceplant the floor, you go straight into the crowd. You don't need a single instance, you'll see it a hundred times every basho. I don't know why you're defending such an obviously dangerous practice, that isn't even traditional. The dohyo was raised to provide better viewing angles for early TV cameras.

>>234602
>It doesn't happen because your instincts won't let it.
Do you think "instincts" are some magical force that bends the body away from harm

>>234602
Your instincts are supposed to stop you from charging head-first at things. A large part of sumo training for newbies is teaching them to ignore their instincts and put themselves at risk.

>>234605
Kinda, yeah.

>>234610
Do you know who Hibikiryuu is?

>>234611
The kid who didn't die from falling off the dohyo? >>234611 was right, you do keep moving the goalposts.

>>234612
I'm not the person you were talking to before. Stop thinking that you are always talking to one person.
I mentioned Hibikiryu in re
>instincts are some magical force that bends the body away from harm
He fell headfirst and died. Literally nothing about "instincts" makes it difficult or impossible to suffer a face-first injury.

Also, general spinal injuries have nothing to do with faceplanting. Contrary to your understanding, the spine actually descends all the way down one's back. When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.

>>234613
>Literally nothing about "instincts" makes it difficult or impossible to suffer a face-first injury.
Except for the distance you fall, retard.
> Contrary to your understanding
My understanding of what? Now who's thinking they're talking to one person?
>the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>often
[Citation needed]

>terunofuji shitting on atami for always giving up on the belt
Thank fuck, maybe he can hammer some sense into his skull

>>234614
>Except for the distance you fall, retard.
What the fuck are you talking about?

>[Citation needed]
Sorry, you're going to argue that falling from a platform onto your back will not often cause a spinal injury?

>>234558

guys being dudes

>>234618
More time to fall means more time to brace yourself, you dumbass.
>you're going to argue
That's not how this works. YOU argued it, you back it up, sailor.

>>234603
You sound gay and retarded. Go back to plebbit.

>>234621
This

>>234620
What is the position you are trying to defend? Just say what it is in plain writing.

>>234623
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
No, no, little dumbass. This is the position YOU are trying to defend. Show me the data on a two foot fall onto a padded floor, or fuck right off.

Every dohyo fall according to redditors

>>234624
Why are you arguing with me?

>>234624
>padded floor
Futagoyama is fat as fuck, but he doesn't count as sports padding like you'd see in say, trampolining. Neither do any of the other shimpan, or the spectators. Falling face-first onto someone's knee isn't going to do you any good.

>>234621
>lost the argument
>resorts to insults
Every single time...

>>234626
Because you've made wild claims with nothing to back it up.
>>234627
Neither is falling face first onto an un-padded floor, but that's not what is around the dohyo.
>>234628
>I'm not the person you were talking to before. Stop thinking that you are always talking to one person.

>>234629
What was the wild claim? What is YOUR claim? What the fuck are you doing shitting up the thread?

>>234630
Are you fucking retarded?
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
That is the claim I am protesting. If you didn't make that claim, fuck off. If you did, prove it or fuck off.
My only claim was that instincts protect the body from harm.
>>234631
Yeah, because that really shows the floor quite well.

>>234632
That's the point. Even if there was proper padding put down (there isn't, because the JSA is cheap and doesn't care about safety) its benefits would be negated by the fact that you literally can't see the floor around the dohyo due to all the people sitting around it. Those shimpan could reach out and touch the edge of the dohyo, they're so close. Any falls off the dohyo will not be a "two foot fall onto a padded floor", it'll be "right into a crowd of people". This is laughably dangerous and wouldn't pass a risk assessment in any other country or any other sport.

>>234633
>literally can't see the floor around the dohyo due to all the people sitting around it.
Uh huh... sure .... yup. Hey, have you tried this new site? https://www.reddit.com/ You might enjoy it.

>>234598
>They definitely didn't do that at all.
sure, but it would've been funny if they did

>>234632
>My only claim was that instincts protect the body from harm.
It *can* do that, but it does not necessarily do that. We know this because sometimes people die due to injuries. Do you accept that?

>>234636
Duh. I fail to see it's relevance. Did you have more?

>>234636
nta but list every rikishi that has died from injuries caused by falling off the dohyo

>>234634
>everyone who disagrees with me is the reddit bogeyman
You're a child. Even in your chosen picture, there are people sitting right next to the dohyo. In every basho you've ever watched, rikishi fall into the crowd. Some, like Tobizaru, are well known for going right into the third and fourth row. This is clearly and pointlessly dangerous, and you don't have a leg to stand on in this argument. Are you a teenager, who still thinks he's invincible? Have you ever worked anywhere dangerous, like a factory or an oil rig? Anywhere like that has a list of safety regulations longer than your arm, and every single rule on there is written in blood. If you haven't ever seen a sumo wrestler hurt himself from falling badly off the dohyo, then you're a lucky newbie. You will if you watch for long enough, and if you've got an ounce of empathy you'll wish that someone had introduced some safety protocols before he fell.

>Some, like Tobizaru, are well known for going right into the third and fourth row.
Yeah, look at all the matches he's missed due to those nasty spinal injuries. Cry me a fucking river, faggot.
>if you've got an ounce of empathy
I don't.

>>234640
Thanks for admitting you're an idiot sociopath. Everyone can safely ignore your opinion, because you're incapable of thinking like a normal human being.

>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>often

Yeah to be honest I dont give a shit at all if people get injured
Normal human being lol
Your normal human beings are currently carrying on 3 seperate wars, mr morally superior
But sure, because you cried when Tobizaru got a boo-boo, you're the next Gandhi

>>234644
*separate

>>234644
Just stop. This would be sad enough if you were a 15 year old edgelord, and I suspect you're much older than that.

>>234646
>often

>>234646
>oh no I cant refute anything he said and I look like a massive retarded hypocrite

You're so fucking high on your own farts

>>234646
>lost the argument
>resorts to insults

>>234639
>>234641
Sumo is a full contact combat sport. Multiple top-level rikishi have gone on record saying a rikishi must accept death every time they step on the dohyo. You have yet to actually show even a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard bout.

>>234652
>a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard bout
this happened literally THIS BASHO

>>234649
You're just insisting that it's fine for things to be dangerous, because nobody you're aware of has died or been crippled yet. This is such a ridiculous and naive position, especially if you look at how battered and chronically injured any veteran wrestler is, that it needs no refutation. You have no argument, you're just being unpleasant because it's the only way you know how to behave.
>>234652
You're missing the point. Yes, sumo carries a lot of inherent risks that can't be removed without fundamentally changing how the sport works. That's no excuse for adding even more unnecessary risks, like raising the dohyo. This is a modern change that wasn't made with the best interest of the rikishi in mind. You have yet to make a single compelling argument for why the dohyo should be raised off the floor at all.

>>234654
A non-athlete got a spinal injury in his leg?! STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES!!

>>234654
They normally take the time to put robes on injured rikishi before carting them out?

>>234655
Life is fatal. Should we ban that too?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyKjY3n8zqQ&t=188s
Or how about Tomokaze, who landed on his feet after falling from the dohyo, and who is legally disabled as a result of the injury? The doctors told him that they had considered amputation at first due to the severity of his condition.

>>234655
>You're just insisting that it's fine for things to be dangerous
If they're undertaken voluntarily, which sumo is, then yes, it's perfectly fine.

>>234655
If it was actually an unnecessary risk then you'd be able to prove that falling off the dohyo has a higher risk than normal competition, but all you can find are one rikishi every five years injured from a fall when the injury rate on the dohyo is much higher.

>>234656
A JSA employee got seriously injured due to falling off the dohyo. This would be shocking in any other sports federation. In a sane world, he should be entitled to a sizeable amount of compensation. Because this is sumo, nothing will happen and nothing will change.

>>234661
Still wrestling, last I checked. Although I'm starting to see a pattern here. It seems most rikishi have spines in their legs.

>>234664
>This would be shocking in any other sports federation

https://youtube.com/watch?v=PrYw3GQcrWc

>>234664
It's a leg injury. They'll pay for it to be repaired and he'll get back to what he was doing. Why the fuck would anything change?

>>234662
No, it isn't fine. There are lots of dangerous sports, like boxing and MMA, but those sports still have a responsibility to ensure that the athletes don't have to take unnecessary risks. That's why fights are often stopped before their conclusion by judges concerned about safety, like for eyebrow gashes.
>>234663
You're STILL missing the point. There's no good reason for it to be raised at all. It shouldn't be one rikishi every five years, it should be no rikishi ever getting injured as a direct result of falling off an elevated platform, because there shouldn't be an elevated platform to fall off.
>>234667
>why should anything change
Because it's a completely preventable injury, and steps should be taken to try and ensure it doesn't happen again.

>>234664
Yes, we know, the western world is obsessed with suing for millions over fucking everything.

>>234656
kill yourself

>>234669
Yes, in the civilised world it's understood that if you're injured in the workplace as a result of your employer not taking proper safety precautions, you deserve some compensation for it.

>>234668
Then you'll complain about rikishi, judges, and spectators getting more frequently injured from rikishi falling onto them and whine about something else like setting up a barrier around the dohyo. Then you'll whine about rikishi getting injured running into the barrier. Shit happens in any sport, even the non-contact ones, you cannot run around trying to get rid of every freak injury because that results in killing the sport.

>>234668
The boxing ring is also raised off the ground. Im surprised someone as morally concerned as you didnt know that. Surely you werent just saying anything you could think of that might support your argument?

>>234611
A textbook example of a fat retard who got into sumo because it was daycare for his stupid ass. Go ahead, downvote me, I've seen the video and holy fuck what a stupid retard.

>>234665
>It seems most rikishi have spines in their legs.
>You have yet to actually show even a single example of a dohyo fall being more dangerous than the wear of a standard bout

>>234671
The compensation is supposed to be reasonable. In the west people get a papercut and immediately try to take the company for all they're worth.

>>234668
Why didnt boxing take steps to prevent horrible tragedies like this from repeating themselves? Where were the special safety refs?

https://www.dazn.com/en-US/news/boxing/ben-whittakers-fight-ends-in-chaos-suffers-injury-after-falling-out-of-the-ring/1h9u2ewn5w4xz1c5miucpoogpk

>>234675
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>OFTEN

>>234664
>This would be shocking in any other sports federation.
NHL tells its officials to stop being whiny bitches when they get injured. They regularly eat punches to the face when NHL players are getting into scrums, and a few years ago a player ran into an official hitting the back of his neck and the NHL threw out what's supposed to be an automatic suspension.

>>234672
Yes, I think the dohyo should be level with the floor, surrounded by padding thick enough to absorb the massive impacts, and that spectators and judges shouldn't ever be close enough to be fallen on. None of this is unreasonable.
>>234673
A boxing ring has ropes around it to stop men from being beaten back and falling off. The objective of a boxing match isn't to push the other man out of the ring, either. It could be better, I agree. MMA makes it impossible to fall out of the ring, which is a huge improvement, albeit with the tradeoff of making it harder for paramedics to get in to attend to injured fighters. Boxing certainly does better than sumo as far as health and safety goes, however, which is an embarrassingly low bar to clear.
>>234677
I don't know. I think they should take steps to stop that from happening again.

>>234679
Everyone involved in conduct like that should be prosecuted. What a terrible and unprofessional organisation - thanks for letting me know so I can avoid it.

>>234681
I think you should switch to watching synchronized swimming, little buddy.

>>234680
> None of this is unreasonable.

>>234682
Why? Most sports don't accept their athletes acting like thugs. Hell, even sumo draws the line at that.

>>234684
What the fuck are you blabbering about
This is like talking to a jew
Slimy

>>234680
Just so you know since you seem unaware: spectators CHOOSE to be that close to the ring.

>>234678
Sorry, what don't you understand? How often do you see rikishi fall off the dohyou onto their backs? OFTEN, *when* that happens, there is a spinal injury. Not "often, rikishi fall off the dohyou and injure their spines". This fact is not in question, and what I wrote was not ambiguous.

>>234687
Okay, show me these rikishi.

This faggot has a really weird definition of "spinal injury".

>>234685
The post I was originally responding to was describing brutal and thuggish conduct by the athletes and the officials. I said that such a thing is unusual and not tolerated in other sports. I'm sorry you cant follow a conversation.
>>234686
I'm sure people would choose to sit closer to a football match or a tennis match if they could, but that would be distracting and dangerous so they aren't allowed to.

>>234690
Hyperbolic British faggotry on full display.

>>234691
>losing an argument on full display

>>234688
Give me Kintamayama's archive and I will.

>>234690
We're talking to teenagers and internet tough guys. I'm not sure there's any point in continuing.

>>234692
>What is basketball

>>234694
Basketball? That game where the spectators are allowed to sit under the hoop for a better view?

>>234695
Same side. Yes.

>>234690
>I'm sure people would choose to sit closer to a football match or a tennis match if they could
HEY GET BACK HERE WITH THOSE GOALPOSTS

I still want to know how you morally justify war when you're losing your mind over a guy falling three feet

All the safety regulations in the world arent stopping Israeli bombs

>>234693
>Give me Kintamayama's archive and I will
So your claim was made without evidence?

>>234698
Slightly over 2 ft.

>>234698
Who's been trying to morally justify war? Do you think that it's Trump and Netanyahu in this thread arguing about sumo?

>>234699
I saw something happen. I don't have a copy of what I saw because of the NHK copyright bullshit. I guess every basho from 2011-2020 didn't happen because they aren't available for viewing; I can't prove that they happened.

>>234702
Jason's channel is mostly complete on the Internet Archive. He ought to have most of the fights you're thinking of.

>>234702
>When a rikishi falls off the dohyo onto his back, the impact will often cause a spinal injury.
>I can't prove that they happened.
Thank you.

>>234704
>>234687
you should kill yourself

>>234705
Why both?

>>234701
You claim to have a moral concern because people are being injured unnecessarily.

Yeah it sure would be a stretch to relate that to war somehow...

And what if you somehow noticed that the safety regs you love to fellate are written and enforced by the same governments engaged in war?

No, you're right. Why would you care if an Iranian child gets killed by a missile when Tobizaru might twist his ankle? I mean, gotta have your priorities straight. Especially when you use your inflated sense of moral superiority to try to brow beat people into supporting silly rule changes. Why? To prevent injury? Right? Yes, without Trump or Netanyahu in the room it just isnt relevant to anything or anyone in the world. Especially not bleeding hearts claiming to be deeply concerned about people getting hurt.

>>234707
NTA, but you need to put the phone down for a few days, Anon.

>>234709
It was asked and answered. I didnt want to go that far into it, I was just trying to get this twit to realize that his safety obsession is not only silly, but small-minded.

>>234707
What on earth are you going on about? Firstly, sumo safety regulations are written and enforced by the JSA - this is technically a subordinate of the MEXT agency in the Japanese government, but in practice is mostly autonomous. As you should know, Japan is famously anti-war since the absolute drubbing they received in WW2, and has no proper army these days. The Japanese government is not engaged in any wars, and is not responsible for anything occurring in the Middle East. The JSA certainly isn't. Secondly, you're the only one in this thread bringing war up at all. I haven't previously given my opinion on any of the various armed conflicts going on around the world - for your information, I am anti-war myself, I consider Israel to be an aggressor masquerading as a victim, and I didn't vote for and do not support any of the governments involved in that war or any other active wars. Finally, someone's position regarding world conflicts isn't necessarily (or often) linked to the same person's position regarding workplace and athletic health and safety - these are two entirely different areas of concern, formed and motivated by entirely different things.

>make one joke about dohyo
>leave computer, go to sleep
>come back to 4 hour argument over nothing
/sumo/...

>Wake up
>100+ posts on /sumo/
oh baby looks like some fags wanted to argue about tangentially related sumo topics while rage baiting each other
>the eventual pol turn
of course

>>234683
This would be sick though.
>>234714
It's what it be these days, these dudes can't stop themselves.

Here's your new dohyo for the Hakuho Global Sumo Mongol Price Worldwide League.

>>234715
There should be six extra bashos a year, so we don't end up degenerating into pointless shitflinging during the interims.

>>234715
>This would be sick though.
The dohyo is inside it to prevent the rikishi from getting sunburn.

Do you think there's any rikishi who have a genuinely big dick?

>>234721
There's only about 600 of them. There's a fair chance that one of them might have a 1 in 1000 dick, but a low chance of anyone having a 1 in 10000 dick.

>jannies tried to interfere again

Lmao I literally did not even notice until I scrolled up and saw some deleted posts
What absolutely assblasted ineffectual retards

>>234721
Just the ones with spinal injuries.

>>234724
Oh no! Whatever will we do without all those shitty low-effort posts!

>>234725
Uhhh isn't that most of them???

>>234726
You mean like yours?

>>234728
Anon, think about what you've just said. Look at how bad some of the posts on here are, and now understand that the ones that get deleted are even worse. The jannies are just clearing up the trash.

>>234730
>he actually thinks 4chan jannies are the arbiters of good taste

Holy shit lmao

>>234732
He's British, he wouldn't know taste if it bit him on his spotted dick.

>>234732
They've got better taste than you. I remember what those deleted posts that you're lamenting said.
>>234733
>Everyone I don't like is British!

Lets see if you still think so in a few minutes

>>234735
Was something meant to happen?

>>234736
Your mom said she would talk to you about it when she got back
And she got dressed and left a while ago

>>234721
Someone said that Ura has a fat hog, and this was allegedly confirmed by a mawashi malfunction on tour

>>234739
They were talking about Kinbozan.

>>234745
seen it

>>234747
need it or keep it?

What'd we think of the new chris video?
Apparently Atamifuji is learning challenged

The Asakoryu/Ishizaki bouts were a nice treat

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzJCGMvdTK8

Glory to Hosh

>>234751
It's not an Atamifuji problem. Isegahama is still a rookie coach, and he isn't yet capable of bringing the best out of his men in the way he hopefully will be after five or ten years in the role. This is his first training camp where he's truly taking the lead, and some frustration is inevitable and invaluable.

>>234754
Asahifuji is still there though, even if Teru is taking lead.
It feels wrong calling him Miyagino.

>>234755
Of course he's still there, but it's like when a man becomes a dad. His own dad might still be very present in his life, but everyone accepts that things have shifted. Even if there's a man with forty years of dad experience on call whenever you need him, you still have to learn the lessons yourself.

>>234756
Hakoho praised the precision of Teru's coaching though which would point to it being an ATF issue

>>234759
*Hakuoho

>>234759
Atamifuji is in a general slump this past year, and to me that indicates that whatever approach is being taken with the stable as a whole isn't working well for him. The transfer of power to a new master is (or ought to be) an excellent opportunity for a younger, fresher man to work out a new strategy for bringing Atamifuji's raw potential to the fore. I hope moto-Terunofuji is up to the challenge.

Iseghama has really fallen off since Teru became on oyakata there.
They used to have a yokozuna on the banzuke and now they don't even have anyone who can hack it at joi level.
I haven't looked up the latest heya power rankings, but it seems like good odds that Iseghama isn't even top ranked anymore, Hidenoumi's promotion on the next banzuke should put Kise above them

>>234764
>Takkers
>ATF
>Hakuoho
>Kusano

Those are all up and comers even if some aren't shining at the moment

>>234751
>watching anything that pathetic beta faggot makes
Nope.

>>234636
>It *can* do that, but it does not necessarily do that.
Rikishi have specific training on breakfalls and rolls to minimize the risk of injury. There are also rules that allow rikishi to protect themselves during falls.

>>234680
>A boxing ring has ropes around it to stop men from being beaten back and falling off
>MMA makes it impossible to fall out of the ring
Ropes are terrible at preventing people from falling out.

>>234766
What do you expect me to do, read translated versions of japanese sports news myself?

RAISE THE DOHYO

>>234770
>read translated versions of japanese sports news
Wait, so Chris doesn't even understand Japanese himself? Despite living in Japan so he can stalk the rikishi?

>>234773
Well I assume he does. I certainly don't.

>>234664
>A football coach slipped on the grass
>WTF WHY DO THEY PLAY ON SUCH A SLIPPERY SURFACE???
People like you are why children are so coddled and weak.

I dunno why Teru is so shocked he can't get through to Atami. Atami is a big dope who joi'd on his size, not his skill. If his fighting spirit dwindles he's left with basically nothing.

>>234775
Avoiding danger isn't weakness, it's common sense. Or are you a masochist, do you enjoy breaking your ankles?

>>234788
And is this "danger" in the room with us right now?

>Kusano
>草野
>Grass Field
>Except 草 is nip for lol
>His shikona is really Field of Laughter

>>234812
Danger is always lurking to catch the unwary.

>>234812
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyKjY3n8zqQ&t=188s

>>234815
Is this the spinal injuries you were talking about?

>>234816
>you
I have never been in a general or any sort of forum where this is so common. Why does everyone here think that there's only two posters?

>>234813
It's his name.

>>234817
There ARE only two posters. Those who want the dohyo to be raised, and those who are faggots.

>>234785
I can see him beating the shit out of his rikishi some day, guy looks scary.

>>234821
I can see him going down as one of the greatest Oyakata of all time. The guy was 20+ yusho material easy if it wasn't for his exploding knees, but while all recent great Yokozuna have fallen out with the JSA, Teru seems to be in lock step with them. And apparently his insights into how rikishi can improve are surprisingly technical.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cr_qywaLdfw&ab_channel=%E6%97%A5%E6%9C%AC%E7%9B%B8%E6%92%B2%E5%8D%94%E4%BC%9A%E5%85%AC%E5%BC%8F%E3%83%81%E3%83%A3%E3%83%B3%E3%83%8D%E3%83%AB

TRUE sloppa. Not that beya shit.

>>234664
>In a sane world, he should be entitled to a sizeable amount of compensation
fucking am*ricans dictating other on what living in a sane world should be like

>>234826
>apparently his insights into how rikishi can improve are surprisingly technical.
Where'd you hear that?

>>234830
I've heard it a couple times in the last few months from random sources. It's probably why he's so frustrated with Atamifuji taking nothing in.

>>234829
How dare you accuse someone of being Am*rican without proof. Anon didn't even attach a picture of a hamburger.

>>234826
>The guy was 20+ yusho material easy if it wasn't for his exploding knees
hate this kind of fanboi simp motivated reasoning. why is always "because he trains" so hard when a guy is good, but not his fault when he fails to take care of his body properly? teru was a lazy drunk and is responsible for his own mediocrity.

>>234835
There is literally nothing you can do to prevent some part of your body exploding when you're fucking huge and train like a rikishi. Just gotta hope you're born with Tamawashi genes.

>>234836
>knees can't be strengthened but arms and shoulders and thighs can

>>234828
Exactly what I needed to start my day: rikishi unenthusiastically missing free throws to an EDM version of Ode to Joy

>>234839
Someone needs to send Kneesovertoesguy to Japan to see if he can't devise some sort of preventative measure for exploding knees

>>234836
There's a lot you can do to avoid developing diabetes, which seriously affects your body's ability to heal from injuries. There's a lot you can do to avoid developing hepatitis, which is ruinous for your health. Terunofuji used to be a spoilt rich kid, and thought he was hot shit as a young ozeki. He lived large and paid the price, and for a long time he was so weak that Koga could have beaten him. His comeback was impressive and admirable, but it was entirely his own fault that a comeback was necessary at all. He should have been a yokozuna five years earlier, and could have won much more cups if he had been.

>>234839
What a stupid fucking post.

>>234840
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scAeHlmW0yI

No, but seriously: here's a recent vid of Kakuryu hooping with some Japanese basketball youtuber.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vd_rdLQl5po

>>234846
Just so you know, "hooping" is negro slang for doing drugs anally.

>>234847
That's what he's doing.

>>234828
if japan had not strayed from the bushido path, atamifuji (pbuh) would have been within his rights to behead this man on the spot. and the crowd would have cheered

>>234846
I like how all Kakuryu has to do is walk backwards and the twink can't do shit.

>>234847
Inaccurate. It's prison slang for concealing an item inside your anus.

>>234855
One of the first things George Floyd was asked minutes before dying of a fentanyl overdose was if he'd been hooping, to which he replied "yeah". He wasn't in prison at this time.

>>234856
Yeah well my source is Wes Watson.
I think my source would beat yours in a fight.

>>234849
It's ok to bully maegashira

>>234859
Were any of them Sanyaku at the time? Abi bobs in and out while Onosato only made it in May.

OKAY FAGGOTS IT'S TIME

https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp
https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp
https://strawpoll.com/PKglejzooZp

WHICH OF THE UPPER SANYAKU DO YOU THINK WILL DO THE BEST IN THE JULY BASHO

>>234868
It's Kotozakura's turn.

>>234869
Honestly, I fucking wish.
>Hosh and 'sato put in 11-4s, beating all Maegashira and losing close fights to upper Sanyaku who continue their 'zeki runs
>Kotozakura shows how incredibly unhappy he was to be forced to be part of making Onosato's tsuna with a 13-2Y
>He follows it up with a 12-3Y in September while Kirishima and Wakatakakage both make Ozeki
Imagine the shitstorm.

>>234870
>upper Sanyaku who continue their 'zeki runs
upper is ozeki and yokozuna
lower is sekiwake and komusubi

Current sumo stable power rankings:
1. Isegahama - 5 maegashira, 2 juryo, 1 makushita joi
2. Kise - 4 maegashira, 2 juryo
3. Tatsunami - 1 yokozuna, Meisei, Akua
4. Nishonoseki - 1 dai yokozuna, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
5. Oitekaze 1 sanyaku, 2 maegashira, Daiyusho
6. Sadogatake - 1 ozeki, 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
7. Arashio - 1 sanyaku, 1 maegashira, 2 juryo
8. Naruto - 1 sanyaku, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
9. Sakaigawa - 2 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
10. Ajigawa - 1 sanyaku, 1 makushita joi
11. Tokitsukaze - 2 maegashira
12. Takadagawa - 5 juryo
13. Futagoyama - 1 maegashira, 2 juryo
14. Nakamura - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo, 1 makushita joi
15. Isenoumi - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
16. Kataonami - 1 maegashira, 1 juryo
17. Otowayama - KiriSHITma
18. Otake - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
19. Tokiwayama - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
20. Shikoroyama - Abi
21. Tagonoura - Takayasu
22. Takasago - 1 maegashira, 2 makushita joi
23. Onomatsu - Onokatsu
24. Takekuma - Gonoyama
25. Hanaregoma - Ichiyamamoto
26. Kokonoe - Chiyoshoma
27. Ikazuchi - Shishi
28. Dewanoumi - 1 maegashira, 1 makushita joi
29. Tamanoi - 2 juryo
30. Kasugano - 1 juryo
31. Fujishima - 1 juryo
32. Oshiogawa - 1 juryo
33. Nishikido - 1 juryo
34. Hakkaku - 1 makushita joi
35. Oshima - 1 makushita joi
36. Onoe - 1 makushita joi

Notes on the rankings:
Sumo stable power rankings are a feature available exclusively on 4chan, they are trademarked, copyrighted and I peed on them just to make sure.
These ranking feign objectivity but in reality are entirely based on the author's prejudices and misunderstandings of the sport and it's participants. There are probably misspellings and typographical errors too.
Unlisted stables are too awful to have been included in the rankings and should feel ashamed of themselves.
Sumo Spiffy will never make a video about these rankings, thank god.

I would also like to express my gratitude to the JSA for allowing me to view their website, that was a big help.

>>234882
This is big...

>>234884
For you

>>234882
>Hakkaku talking shit about any other oyakata

I love fat men!!!!!! I have sex with one he is the best

I want slop before the basho

>>234882
>One yokozuna beats two san'yaku
>One san'yaku beats two maegashira
>One maegashira beats two juryo
Each step up is much harder than the previous one, and should be recognised as such.

>>234882
>Onomatsu - Onokatsu
Are their other rikishi called things like Onosatsu, Onobatsu, and Onopatsu?

>>234907
Slop day continues. Tatsunami is launching an international fan club.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHb7SUGfsHM

>>234882
Impressive, very nice. Now let's see the updated power rankings for Psicopático and Dandadan.

>>234909
Absolutely love a Japanese curry me. Would love to slurp one down with the lads after a hard day's work.

>>234896
Sure and some stats are list as "maegashira" but someone in upper maegashira counts more than someone in the double digits, so having an M2e might beat having a J9e & J13w while at the same time having M16w wouldn't beat J1e + J1w. Unless perhaps I really like the guy at M16w in which case I might let it slide

>>234924
How about a 1.5x modifier for being in the joi? Then J1 and J2 would still beat a lone M16.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTWZfAolmZw
The 1991 retirement of sumo legend David Jones, who retired after 30 years of presenting a PanAm Airlines trophy to yusho winners. He was noted for his extremely poor command of Japanese, which he reprised at 10:07 here for his final performance. His pronunciation of "Hyoushoujou" became a meme.

In the interview segment, he talks about how, once, he failed to write down the name of the winning wrestler, and had to lean over to him to ask him his name (Wajima) before finishing the trophy declaration. Wajima's eyes bugged out when he realized what he was being asked, Jones recalls.

There is also footage of him being lifted by Takamiyama at a party in Jones' honor.

>Tatsunami starting an international fan club
>not using traditional straw bales in the dohyo

What if they split and joined Dayan Sumo? Can you imagine shitstorm?

>>234931
They can't join Dayan Sumo, it's for amateurs.

>>234926
Is he the reason theres one guy going HYOOSHYOOJOO in award ceremony outside of tokyo?

>>234934
Do you have a clip? I don't recall hearing that. But yes, possibly

>>234925
Each individual is judged subjectively by standards which only somewhat mimic an objective numerical appraisal in order to give the rankings a veneer of authoritativeness

>>234899
Onoratsu - he finks to the JSA if you bully him
Onovatsu - takes 15% of ur money
Onofatsu

>>234954
Onobatsu - has never won a bout due to his insistence on entering the ring upside-down.

>>234954
>Onofatsu
He's severely undersized for a sumo wrestler

Onozigguratsu - the raised dohyo meme

Onoplapsu - Asanoyama after moving stable

>>234882
>Kataonami
they only have 4 rishiki total, two have salaries.
is there any other stable that successful, with 50% of the crew making sekitori rank?

alternatively
Kataonami must suck cause they can't recruit, nobody wants to go there.

>>234965
Surely having such a high sekitori rate would make people want to go there. Also doesn't this mean Kataonami has more than one foreign rikishi? I guess that rule isn't hard and fast?

>>234968
Maybe not, since you'd instantly become someone's servant, have to go on jungyo, carry bags, wipe ass, etc. In a stable with only other low rankers, there's a good chance you can escape most of the scut work.

Takahara looks pretty huge

>>234968
The rule is relaxed for stable closures. Tamashoho moved over when his former stable, Nakagawa, was shut down because its stablemaster was demoted.

>>234968
If your stable folds or you get moved, you can join a stable that already has a foreigner.

>>234982
He must be laughing his lmao off in the grave watching how embarrassingly mediocre horseshitryu is as a yokozuna.

Yoshibayama looking jacked

>>234985
>Because of the bullet in his ankle, Yoshibayama's style of fighting was erratic. It also did not help that his favourite technique was the controversial ketaguri, or leg kick,[4] which was considered to be unacceptable at his top yokozuna rank

if it's not oshidashi or yorikiri it is dishonourabuu

t. japan sumo pro

>>234982
Golden grin Olympic Jiji

>Aonishiki, no bouts just basics
>Onosato, same
>Hoshoryu, also same
No bouts just basics meta incoming

>>235010
It's like they were all given the same script. Even Zak has said the same thing.

>>235011
Nothing new there, then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWVeT9LCb78
EAT YOUR SLOP STRAIGHT FROM THE OVEN

>>235017
Wrong! Wait your turn and eat your slop in order of rank.

>>235010
They got tired of pretending to fight each other

>>235025
lol, he’s going to be fuming about Hakuho for the rest of his life.

>>235032
it makes me sick to see that pretender shake hands with a REAL martial artist

>>235043
I'm sure Seagal didn't mind, anon

>>235032
>>235043

Good Chris video. Who is going to take over the chairmanship after Hakkaku?

>Futagoyama slop is like 1.5 months old

why do they do this
their hopes for the May tournament are utterly irrelevant on June 22nd
it's not amusing to see Koga say he'll do his best and know he went 1-5-1
I'm sure they didn't used to offset this much

>>235054
its for idiots, thats why its so terrible

>>235054
For a half million subs channel, it's a really barebones operation. The cameraman works alone with the benefit of the occasional static camera. The subtitles are apparently done personally by the okami-san. The upload schedule is brutal considering how long the videos are. They should make it once a week or hire more staff.

I wanna see a show tournament where gyoji fight in the ring while rikishi do the judging. Imagine Onosato darting around the edge going
>TEREBETAAAAAHTEREBETEREBETEREBETAAAAAHHHH

>>235057
Nobody tell him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgeEvQiihC8

Not to be outdone by Futagoyama, Oshima just dropped a sloppa.

>>235062
why not watch something better?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlWSnPie3A8

>>235065
No subtitles, no watch.

>>235066
filtered

>>235068
Yes, they have filtered themselves out of my smorgasbord of entertainment by being too lazy to translate their content for me. Sad!

>>235069
filtered

>>235054
i found it funnier Nobehara being happy about not having to be on chanko duty anymore in a video a few weeks back, while he was 3-4 in may so he's going back to kitchen.

>>235065
Cute

>>235066
It has subtitles

I love autotranslate so much

>>235083
I dunno it seems realistic for sumo wrestlers

>Hakkaku whining that youngsters don't want to become rikishi
That's because there's no one inspiring them to do it. Onosato and his incoming rivalry with Hoshoryu has singlehandedly saved Japanese sumo. Maybe if Hakkaku wasn't such a shit oyakata he could've raised up the next big thing himself.

>>235085
Hakkaku's dad was a fisherman. Compared to the prospect of hauling fish nets in for the rest of your life, becoming a sumo wrestler sounds like a great option. If you have a comfortable, easy life, why would you even consider joining a stable?

>>235086
This post reeks of unemployed.

Hell yea Asa tell em

>>235088
Are you trying to argue that life in Tokyo didn't sound more appealing than being a fisherman in Hokkaido during the 70s?

>>235074
Same.

>>235089
>>235092
Reddit is down the hall and to the left.

>>235093
But I can't call you a fag on Reddit.

>>235090
It's not the 70s anymore and his father is still fishing at 88 when I'm sure he could've comfortably retired a long time ago considering his son is presumably wealthy, what with being a former Yokozuna and Chairman of the JSA. Maybe the guy just likes fishing so doesn't mind doing it as a job. Maybe "hauling fish nets" isn't as bad as it sounds from your armchair.

>>235092
Really wish this ended in some light-hearted sparring, though it looks like Hakuho would fucking dunk on Asa now.

>>235095
weirdly defensive about this

>>235095
It was the 70s when Hakkaku decided to pursue sumo instead of following his father's footsteps, or looking at the other employment available in his tiny, bleak home town. Life as a rikishi, even in the bad old days, seemed like a lifeline and the prospect of becoming even a middling sekitori represented a huge improvement. This is not an uncommon sentiment - this is why rural Japan is increasingly desolate and depopulated while Tokyo continues to sprawl. The same goes for any developed country. If given a chance, any chance at all, the vast majority of young people choose to abandon the dirty, difficult and dangerous jobs their fathers and grandfathers did and move to the big city.

>>235098
So you're saying that sumo prays on poor children?

>>235099
No, sumo scrapes the bottom of the barrel of poor children.

>>235098
The comments by Chrschizo seemed to suggest that some stables are more strict about wearing kimono and having their hair tied than others.
I thought was a global rule.

It would suck if one stable got to go out in normal clothes with their hair down for normal errands and others would have to get dressed up like it’s the 19th century.

>>235101
It should be a global rule.

>>235101
>having self respect is a punishment
just because you're a repulsive slob doesn't mean everyone else wants to be one

>>235101
It's a global rule for official functions, the optional part is whether they have to get dressed up just to go down to the neighbourhood combini. Considering they need special dedicated hairdressers to get the hair tied up properly, even for non-sekitori, it can be impractical for quick trips, and impossible for stables that don't have a dedicated hairdresser living with them.

>>235103
I'd hate to see active rikishi wearing suits as much as I hate to see them in hoodies. Sumo deliberately rejects modern aesthetics, and this is a huge part of its appeal.

>>235103
what the fuck are you talking about?

Also, they absolutely wear normal clothes out. Beyond just the stable-to-stable variance, my understanding is that it's a matter of to what extent what they're doing is seen as a function of their 'cultural role'. Taking out the trash, for example, doesn't require anything. Going to a restaurant would require the topknot, but maybe not the kimono. Going to a charity event requires the works.

>>235107
The master decides what is and isn't required to take out the trash or go to a restaurant. It's got nothing to do with how official the outing is, if the boss says you have to wear your kimono to go to the konbini then woe betide you if you disobey him.

>>235109
I'd bet anything that there are provisions specifically about this in the sumo regulations. The idea that it's an unofficial policy with no clarification is ridiculous.

>>235110
I don't think there's an official regulation regarding appropriate attire for trips to the local Lawson. It's like how some stables have two practice dohyos, everyone has different chanko recipes, and the amount of free time each master gives his disciples - a stable master is (or is supposed to be) almost entirely autonomous in terms of the day-to-day running of his stable.

>>235110
You underestimate how much leeway the elders give themselves when it comes to the running of their stables.

>>235104
>and impossible for stables that don't have a dedicated hairdresser living with them
According to the current JSA website, there's 10 stables without their own hairdressers: Takasago, Futagoyama, Onoe, Takekuma, Shikoroyama, Nishiiwa, Nakamura, Ajigawa, Hidenoyama and Asahiyama. I'd imagine those stables give their wrestlers more slack so they're not having to constantly visit other stables first just so they can get groceries.

>>235111
>>235112
https://www.sanspo.com/article/20180106-HSWK6JE2F5OXFFJLLJXPJV36QY/
Here's an article stating that Kagamiyama & Kasugano, in their role as NSK PR men, personally warned Takanohana's rikishi (Takakeisho, Takagenji etc) specifically for wearing casual clothing in public. If there weren't a rule written down somewhere, they wouldn't have been able to do that.

>>235116
>in their role as NSK PR men
Yeah yeah.

>>235082
>hire professional translator
>"Hmm, yes, this is wrong. What he says is:"
>Titty wrinkles. I chose a lot of eyebrows, but I'm busy. Blue Wakana Moro.

>>235096
>Hakuho
>trained with his disciples semi-frequently
>bad knees

vs

>Asashoryu
>dumpsters Hoshoryu routinely
>had a tumor

seems 50-50

>>235111
>I speculate about the contents of regulations which I never have and never will read
>my headcannon speculations prove me right

>>235117
>receives information that contradicts predetermined narrative
>information declared invalid
>predetermined narrative stands unchallenged
Hey Chris.

This text intentionally left black.

>>235103
Wearing a kimono in your daily routine in Japan is the same as a fedora tipping R*ddit athiest wearing a suit all the time. Both stick out like a sore thumb and get weird looks because, contrary to what you believe, sticking out like a sore thumb is NOT you respecting yourself.

>>235133
Sumo wrestlers are actively preserving cultural traditions such as wearing kimonos though. That's why it matters for them.

>>235134
And wearing suits used to be a cultural thing in the west. You must really admire fedora tipping athiests, huh?

>>235135
>tradition bad
I bet you want to lower the dohyo faggot.

>>235137
>Is that...
>IS THAT A HECKIN YOKOZUNARINO NOT WEARING A KIMONO??? AAIIIEEEE HAKKAKU-SAMA SAVE ME!!!

>>235138
Who ever accused Hosh of having hinkaku?

>>235092
Peak Reddit

>>235140
Just put the Asa 'jak over his face and call it a day.

>Despite winning 3 of his last 7 basho and getting a JY in there too, Asashoryu lost on the final day of all 7
lmao

>>234985
faggots who scream roids on any rikishi with big traps have been really quiet about this one.

Hakkaku is the problem with recruitment. Youngsters would be more willing to sign up if the face of the JSA wasn't some cranky old fuck. Put someone younger with a sense of humour in the position like Oshima.

>>235148
The problem with recruitment is that 90% of all sumo wrestlers never get a salary, and spend their youth living like monks and doing ass-wiping duty. If every wrestler got paid the Japanese minimum wage, recruitment numbers would skyrocket.

>>235153
There’s also the fact of the health issues. Plenty of Japanese enjoy sumo, but far fewer of them want to purposely become bloatlords to do it, especially in a society that openly fat-shames like Japan’s.
Lots of wrestlers have mentioned that they do not like their bodies, Ura comes to mind.

Before anyone starts shrieking, I’m not suggesting anything be changed. It’s fine the way it is. That’s just the way it is, though.

>>235155
This is true, and ties in to my point. It's a hell of a sacrifice to make just for the chance of maybe becoming a sekitori one day.

>>234534
>>234537
probably, but maybe not. no 30kg plate. reds are usually 25kg
from inside out it would be
20, 20, 25, 10, 10, 2.5, 2 5 = 90x2 = 180+20 = 200
20, 20, 20, 10, 10, 5, 5 = 90 x 2 = 180+20 = 200
basically, its some mix of calibrated and non calibrated plates

your thoughts on today's Chris video?

>>235145
Turns out grapplers have always been muscular.

Very dignified

Unidentified toriteki in May 1920.
In the old days, before the building of various bridges and tunnels, the only way to get to Kyushu was by boat.

>>235186
I think it's ridiculous that Hosh thinks he can act like the "senior" yokozuna after his shitshow debut and his utter inability to perform at Onosato's level

>>235206
consider the rope

>>235206
He was promoted first, he's senior over Onosato by definition. And I don't think he particularly wants it either, he would do just fine without the additional pressure that comes with it. It's just the way it is.

>>235206
Nearly every Yokozuna, at some point in his career, is upstaged by a fresh new one, like an old lion being driven away into the wilderness. Hoshoryu is now completely absolved from the responsibility of having to contend every basho, and as long as he wins a few important bouts every time in technical, experienced ways then he can preserve what's left of his pride.

>>235211
>at some point in his career,
for horseryu that was in his first 'sho as 'zuna.
onosato will take over y1e after this upcoming meet and will never relinquish it

>>235211
>>235212
It's gonna be so fucking funny when Hoshoryu retires with a 38-7 head-to-head record over Onosato

>>235213
And a 7-38 yusho count record.

>>235213
>>235214
Akebono/Takanohana 2.0

>>235214
you can stop jerking off Onosato now, he's been soft for hours

Onosato is too high ranked to beat Hosh

>>235216
I was actually jerking Hoshoryu off, nobody really thinks he's going to get 7 yushos by the end of his career.

>>235153
>If every wrestler got paid the Japanese minimum wage
I feel confident in saying that a place to stay in central Tokyo plus the cost of all the food they eat probably comes to more than the Japanese minimum. Hasn't rice doubled in price in Japan recently?

>>235218
I'd be surprised if he made 6.

>>235222
>a place to stay in central Tokyo
You're sharing a room with like 8 other men, so you're looking at 1/9th the equivalent cost.

>>235223
this but about Onosato

>>235222
It would certainly put the JSA well out of pocket if they paid their low-ranking wrestlers properly. The business model is only sustainable if you can get away with paying 90% of your talent with room and board.

>>235222
They wouldn't have to be in central Tokyo or eat so much if they weren't sumo wrestlers.

>>235227
If my grandmother had wheels she would be a bike.

>>235228
>He doesn't know

>>235228
>would be

>>235229
>You don't know

>>235232
>everyone knows Anon's grandmother

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzqqRHVwUVo&ab_channel=ChrisSumo

S L O P

>>235236
>channel=ChrisSumo
Nice try, Chris

>>235226
>The business model is only sustainable if you can get away with paying 90% of your talent with room and board.
I think that's only true because of the NSK's actions to limit sumo's growth. Look at the social media ban, or the new heya channel restrictions despite how the channels have done considerable work towards generating new sumo fans. Look at how rikishi aren't allowed to appear in commercials anymore without explicit NSK approval because of some weird vendetta in the 90s.
In today's world, many people follow sports and buy things just because they like individual athletes. I think the Association could easily afford to pay minimum wage to toriteki in a world where all those sorts of avenues are decently explored.

>>235246
At the end of the day, if the JSA doesn't offer new recruits a good enough deal, the flow of recruitment will dry up. They can't force young boys to become rikishi, however much they'd like to.

>We must protect the dignity of sumo!
Hakkaku says while everyone laughs at the fatsos. Sumo would be a lot more dignified if rikishi were lean like they used to be and not just lardos.

>>235249
There's no way for any sort of wrestling to be dignified. It's an inherently comical sport.

>>235249
>things you can say about rikishi but not about women

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otXi4R6KhKY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3djPyXzKwQM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aaipuNADaI
A 27 year old man has moved to Japan to try to convince the NSK to let him in. At least a few news outlets have reported on his plight, and he's uploaded videos of himself training at Asahiyamabeya and Tatsunamibeya.
He has surprisingly good Japanese for just some guy, and he's saying all the right things about "honor" and "dignity" and "sumo is a way of life" in the interviews. May he forge a path forward for all the 23+ retards here.

>>235255
What would his shikona be?
>Oibeiyama

They should make an exception for the guy since he's sincere and was genuinely fucked over by everyone becoming retarded in 2020. What's the worst that could happen? He spends 4-5 years there, sits in the arse end of Makushita, then retires? That's hardly worse than what most rikishi achieve. But then again Hakkaku is a complete faggot.

>>235256
They should remove the age limit for new recruits completely. Think of all the depressed salarymen that would jump at the chance for a change, instead of jumping in front of a train.

>>235255
I hereby declare Yarden-san as /sumo/'s official guy, on the condition that he renounces Israel

>>235253
People who have strong opinions about what kind of men they think are the best looking can say it.

>>235258
He'd renounce his own mother if the JSA said he had to.

>>235260
>You may join a smaller, lesser known beya on one condition
>What is it, Hakkaku-sama? I'll do anything!
>You must... denounce the Talmud

>>235261
Hakkaku's based?

>>235255
>climbs ranks
>gets citizenship
>joins JSA
>climbs ranks
>"sumo is dying, it must modernise"
>abolishes foreigner limit, introduces female gyoji, and dare i say it... allows sumotori to drive

>>235261
>joins Shikihide

new banzuke is out, post your reactions

Vintage slop, January 1920.

>>235255
>>235256
>What would his shikona be?
>>Oibeiyama
Kiragoyama (Kill a Goy)

>>235272
>Aonishiki
>not Yokozuna
Not my banzuke.

>>235256
>Anotashoa

>>235289
>あぬっだしょあ (Anuddashoa)
Shame the gyoji would say it when he wins instead of when he loses.
>He gets thrown out
>Breaks his neck
>ANUDDASHOA!!!!!

>>235279
Sumo has always been prime slop material

>奈良〜平安時代の相撲節(すまいのせち)。左・右近衛府に別れて相撲を取りますが、自陣の力士が勝つと?
>正解: みんなで笑い声をあげてはやしたてた
>In the "Sumai no sechi" court sumo tradition, which lasted from the Nara period through the Heian period (710-1185 AD), what was the appropriate response to your side's rikishi winning?
>Answer: Everyone [on the winning side] laughing at and mocking the loser.

Slop-bros, I'm starving...

>>235306
Then we in fact are preserving cultural tradition
Wonderful

>>235306
Was this all always just a way to watch fat guys fall over? This whole time?

I was watching some Takanohana videos.
He was the most impressive Yokozuna I have seen.
Looking at Takanohana and Akebono they looked stronger than rikishi from later eras.

>>235316
There's a reason why everyone who actually knows sumo agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90s, and would be lucky to even get to sekiwake.

>>235317
boomer detected

>>235317
>everyone who actually knows sumo agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90s
So... only Konishiki?

>>235317
I wouldn't go that far. But the level of sumo of Takanohana and Akebono was higher. I guess sumo really was stronger in that era.
Can't imagine those guys having problem with someone like Hokuseiho

>>235322
Who struggled against Hokuseiho in the modern era?

>>235316
Takanohana looked insanely solid in his prime.

>>235324
He is 2-2 against Asanoyama and Oho.

>>235322
I got no problem with Chad, but I never really thought of Akebono having "high level" sumo. He was just massive.

>>235322
>But the level of sumo of Takanohana and Akebono was higher. I guess sumo really was stronger in that era.
Older generations are always good at making what they do look more difficult.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0K0OMWI9xg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTkMDcpTEkU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaeID2gM29s
They aren't actually better.

>>235329
Who?

>>235330
being huge and taking advantage of your size is high level sumo. manlets needing to cope by resorting to obscure moves to win and still ending up at M9 every banzuke is cringe level sumo

>>235333
How big are you, Anon? You must be pretty huge to be able to call M9 sumo wrestlers manlets.

>>235333
Please kill yourself.

>>235335
enho will never make it back to salaried rank

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90ptwPX8z14&t=1672s

April 29th, 1922. Sumo is held on the grounds of the Detached Palace at Kasumigaseki for all the politicians to enjoy.
The sequence of events shown is:
Kashiwayama vs Yamanishiki, then Onishiki's yokozuna dohyoiri, then Fukuyanagi vs Tachihikari, Otohira vs Fukuyanagi, Tochigiyama vs Onishiki, and a yumitorishiki performed by Hitachishima. Then "practice sumo" - what we call butsukarigeiko now - between Tochigiyama and Momijigawa.

This is the only footage I've ever seen of either Tochigiyama or Onishiki wrestling.

>>235336
Good. I don't know why you care though. There are hundreds of wrestlers in between Akebono and Enho in terms of height. Why do you pretend only extremes exist?

>>235333
Midori...

>>235253
You can say anything you want about anyone you want when you aren't a giant pussy, like you. Faggot.

>>235344
It's a riff on Carnac, you fucking drooling moronic retard. Fuck, what an uneducated, low class fucking peasant dipshit you are.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnac_the_Magnificent

>>235345
>Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson

Americans literally consider watching television to be a form of education.

>>235345
NTA, but I assumed it was a reference to Who's Line is it Anyway.
>>235344
Why are you such an angry little bitch? Just leave if you don't like it here.

>>235348
>Who's
Whose... derp

>>235256
>What would his shikona be?

Kikekuryu
Wakaheebakeisho
Takashekelyama

>>235349
Damn you corrected your mistake, I was going to use it against you in a soon-to-be argument about something completely different.

>>235347
Just own up to the fact that you're uncultured, it's nothing to be ashamed of

>>235317
>agrees that Hakuho wouldn't have even made ozeki in the 90s
Bitter, jealous motherfuckers? Sure. Any reasonable person wouldn't agree to that at all. Hakuho was a combination of technique and strength, and what set him and Asahoryu apart was their Mongolian wrestling background that the Japs didn't have, and hence, couldn't counter as effectively.

>>235352
Ah so the goalposts have gone from "uneducated" to "uncultured". Like how blacks stealing and destroying property is "dey culcha". I'm not even the guy you were replying to btw, I just chimed in to call you a faggot, faggot.

>>235345
Seethe more, pussy.

>>235354
Also check my time digits.

>>235348
Fuck you too, faggot.

>>235354
>I just chimed in to call you a faggot, faggot.

>>235256
>What would his shikona be?
河馬羅

Another high quality series of /sumo/ posts

>>235361
>Punished Zak
>A man forced to make the rope for a guy who became Ozeki after him

>>235361
It used to be so whimsical and friendly in this general. Now every week you have people retching all sorts of bile about their most hated wrestlers, people viciously attacking each other for no real reason, endless arguments about nothing. The evil spirits have taken over, and we need to drive them out.

>>235363
What can men do against such reckless hate?

>>235363
>Onosato performs his first basho dohyo-iri
>Half the posts in the thread are deleted, their posters banned

>>235363
>>235361
仕方が無い
TL Note: It be how it do

>>235363
you can thank youtube channels for the influx of newniggers

>>235337
BRING
BACK
DOHYO
POSTS

>>235369
You mean the guy who was building his own dohyo?

translation: watch out we got a yokozuna over here

Changing of the guard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BA9TpJsstR4

WHERE IS MY SLOP

>>235374
I really hope he doesn't try and cheapen what being a yokozuna means.

>>235406
He can't. He isn't a yokozuna any more, he isn't involved in training men to become yokozuna, he isn't part of the YDC or the JSA or any other professional body relating to ozumo. Hakuho's opinion on sumo and on what constitutes a yokozuna is worth no more and no less than the opinion of a random ojisan down at the snack bar.

>>235407
Is the word "yokozuna" trademarked or something?

>>235408
I doubt it. It doesn't really need to be - anyone can call himself an admiral, but that just makes you look stupid if you don't have the fleet of ships to back up your claim.

>>235409
That's sort of my point.

>>235410
My point is that it wouldn't matter if Hakuho decided to start handing out "Hakuho Dayan Global Yokozuna" licences. He's not fooling anyone who matters.

>>235403
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76GLNiwc5ks

>>235417
>No fatslap
>Just eating
It's not the same.

>>235411
I really don’t think he intends to do that.
His thing is probably just going to be a broader based approach to identifying international talent and pipelining it to Japan. He likes scouting out talent.

Somewhere in Finland or Senegal or Chile is a little kid who could be the greatest sumo wrestler ever, but we’ll never see him because he’ll never even learn sumo exists and his talent will be squandered.
If Hakuho figures out a way to find that kid, the sport would only be better off.
(Except for Japanophiles, they will continue to seethe until the end of time.)

>>235421
This makes no sense. You can only have one foreigner per stable, so pipelining more foreign kids to Japan would just result in most of them getting passed over, or never considered at all because your 25 year old Mongolian has ten years left in him. Hakuho is also a divisive figure, and there aren't going to be many oyakatas willing to reject a reliable prospect from his preferred recruiting school to take a chance on Hakuho's new Senegalese boy.

>>235423
>You can only have one foreigner per stable
I expect to see this rule relaxed if the recruiting crunch gets worse.

>>235426
Pretty sure less than half of stables have a foreigner as of right now so it's not like there's huge demand from foreigners to become a rikishi. Hell, Kataonami has two (Tamawashi and Tamashoho).

>>235427
>Hell, Kataonami has two
That’s allowed only when a stable shuts down. Tamashoho was at Kasugayama then at Nakagawa, that whole farrago.

>>235428
I meant it more as two of the current foreigners being at the same stable means there's even less stables that have their foreigner slot taken. About half of all foreign rikishi are sekitori, that's how few there are. If anyone was young, talented, and wanted to be a rikishi, there's plenty of space for them as of right now. There's just no foreign interest in sumo because it's nothing more than fatslap to outsiders and we can experience that down any bar-ridden highstreet on a Friday or Saturday night, so the odds of the JSA relaxing that rule are close to zero. And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot.

>>235429
>And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot.
Can I get a QRD on this? I only get Chris’s schizo point of view, because I can’t read Japanese.

>>235429
I mean, it’s all academic, something to talk about between basho.
Hakuho’s endeavor will most likely fail. He’ll run around as a celebrity for a few years, post on social media, then fade away.

>>235430
Hakkaku is a textbook Japanese salaryman who thinks kissing ass makes good things happen automatically. Despite being a former yokozuna his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitori which in my imo is a really bad look for the JSA Chairman (Musashimaru is half brain dead so he gets a pass). No top prospects want to deal with his ass.

>>235432
Why is being textbook Japanese a bad thing? The entire sport is founded on extremely conservative principles as a way to preserve Japanese culture and ways of life. Can you give any examples of Hakkaku actually doing anything wrong, or do you just despise everyone in Japan that isn't a radical progressive?

>>235433
>Can you give any examples of Hakkaku actually doing anything wrong
He didn’t resign and let Hakuho be the new Chairman.

>>235432
>his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitori which in my imo is a really bad look for the JSA Chairman
Hokutofuji just retired, you fool. He had the heart of sumo at his heya in makuuchi for 8 years.

>>235432
>Despite being a former yokozuna his stable's top rikishi isn't even sekitori
This is JSA-brain at its peak.

>this guy is really good at shoving other guys
>that means he must also be equally good at coaching and also managing a stable
>now he’s old as fuck
>let’s put him in charge of the entire organization strictly on the basis of having been really good at shoving guys decades ago and being able to go this long without him or one of his recruits committing too many felonies.

>>235439
And he couldnt produce a single other makuuchi rikishi in that entire time

Which says it was Hokutofujis talent and not Hakakkus teaching

>>235427
Futagoyama has three
Roga (Russia)
Nabatame (Thailand)
Kuwae (Philippines)

>>235408
No. See the several pro wrestlers who have referred to themselves as such.

>>235442
>it was Hokutofuji's talent and not Hakkaku's teaching
If you want to play that game, then this is true of essentially all sekitori.
Regardless, his ability as a coach has nothing to do with his ability as an administrator. I don't even like Hakkaku, but come on.

>>235448
Next time read my whole post instead of just the part you want to disagree with

Shitnuts

>>235452
>And that's not even factoring in that Hakkaku is a tremendous faggot. ... Hakkaku is a textbook Japanese salaryman who thinks kissing ass makes good things happen automatically.
What does this have to do with the success or lack of success of his students

>>235442
Did you forget about Okinoumi?
Hakkakubeya has produced 11 sekitori in its current incarnation.

When guys get old, they typically slow down recruitment unless they’re running a mega-stable. As chairman, he probably didn’t have the time and energy to devote to coaching and development.

The previous chairman, Kitanoumi, didn’t do much better, with none of his design making it past komusubi.

>>235432
>Conservatives are... le BAD!

>>235463
>The sky is... le BLUE!

>>235467
>>/lgbt/

>>235448
If Hakkaku's so good at administrating fatslap, why are they struggling to get youngsters into it?

>>235473
Because being a sumo wrestler sucks a big bag of dicks.

>>235474
Says person who isn't a sumo wrestler. The JSA should be using beyaslop to their advantage. If kids are all over Youtube, push for more beyaslop that shows the good side of being a rikishi. The fun days out, the good food, make sure you get young rikishi on camera talking about how rewarding the training feels.

Oh wait they didn't have Youtube in the 1800s so I guess that's off limits :/

>>235475
Japanese kids aren't that stupid, at least not en masse. Everyone knows that sumo is incredibly difficult and requires immense personal sacrifices. Everyone knows that you're more likely to peak at sandanme than at san'yaku. Recruitment numbers will remain low until the JSA sweetens the deal, or until employment prospects for young men become dire. Even watching sumo isn't particularly popular with young people these days.

>>235476
And yet Japanese kids all want to be Youtubers when most Youtube channels don't make money either. Curious!

>>235477
Most Youtubers don't have to gain 150 pounds and headbutt each other every day.

>>235475
>The JSA should be using beyaslop to their advantage.
How many young guys out there love watching sumo, love participating in combat sports/martial arts, and have the discipline and talent to go pro, but decide, nah, I don’t want to ALSO have to be a fat fucking blob, live like a monk, and dress like it’s the 1800s, I’m going to go into MMA instead?

>>235478
They don't get a free place to live in Tokyo and mountains of free food either. And both rikishi and Youtubers have zero future prospects, except at least rikishi have fan clubs who help sort them out with SOMETHING when they retire.

Becoming a rikishi is a far better idea than becoming a Youtuber and yet becoming a Youtuber is the most popular thing kids want to do.

>>235454
>replying to me and then quoting a completely separate and different post

Are you just retarded

>>235479
Again, most youngsters who get into MMA just get brain damage and retire in irrelevance. And you should know by now that you don't have to be a fat blob to be a top rikishi. Even in the top division there's plenty of guys in decent enough shape. Asakoryu, Midorifuji, the Waka bros, Aonishiki, and I'd even say Hoshoryu are all in strongfat physique at worst. Women go nuts for that shit.

>>235476
Only losers go in thinking they're going to fail

>>235480
Being a Youtuber is easy. It doesn't require you to put yourself through grueling training, it doesn't require you to ruin your health, it doesn't require you to abandon all semblance of a normal social life. Youtubers don't have to have a goofy hairstyle, Youtubers don't have to do chores for their seniors, Youtubers don't risk crippling injuries. It sure is a surprise that kids would rather be Youtubers than sumo wrestlers.

>>235484
>Being a Youtuber is easy
No, being a BAD Youtuber is easy. All of the best channels on Youtube are made by people who have some sort of expertise or knowledge in something. Very few get big on low quality slop content.

>Captcha: G0DN0

>>235485
And being a bad rikishi is just as hard as being a good one.

>>235486
>Koga puts in the same level of effort as Mita in training
Woah...

>>235482
>And you should know by now that you don't have to be a fat blob to be a top rikishi.
Even the “skinny” rikishi are diabetic.

Put that aside and it’s still
>you don’t get any time off
>you don’t get paid
>you have to live in the stable
>hope you pick a stable you like, because you can’t ever change
>you are effectively a slave to your seniors
>you’re not going to get any intense coaching until you demonstrate that your stablemaster is going to get some return off you. Until then, you’re on your own
>you can’t drive a car
>you can’t have a girlfriend
>you can’t wear normal clothes
>you can’t get a haircut

The fact that they have any recruits at all is miraculous.

>>235487
he could've been the next Mr. Beast

lol
really I don't know who these fuckfaces think they're kidding with this

>>235487
Koga's been doing butsukari for four years in order to peak at Jonidan. He'd have had a much easier time being a Youtuber, wouldn't he?

>>235490
He literally is a youtuber

>>235491
Maybe that's the future of sumo. Forget about the actual wrestling, they can just be ugly bastard idol groups on Youtube.

>>235488
>you don’t get any time off
They don't really "work" either.
>you don’t get paid
They get an allowance which is actually more than it sounds like because so many of their living costs are already covered for them.
>you have to live in the stable
Oh no, a permanent residence!
>hope you pick a stable you like, because you can’t ever change
Literally a non-issue.
>you are effectively a slave to your seniors
I highly doubt any of them are huge dicks about it.
>you’re not going to get any intense coaching until you demonstrate that your stablemaster is going to get some return off you. Until then, you’re on your own
What coaching could they possibly need at that point? And sekitori give tips to lower ranked guys all the time. The Futagoyama guys do it quite a bit.
>you can’t drive a car
A lot of Japanese people don't drive.
>you can’t have a girlfriend
Yes you can lmao.
>you can’t wear normal clothes
Yes you can lmao. Whether you have to always wear robes in public is at the stable's discretion.
>you can’t get a haircut
This is the pettiest non-issue I've ever heard lmaooo

>>235493
Anon, you need to get back to reality. Most people don't even go to the gym regularly, let alone want to be a professional athlete. Even in that small segment of society that has the desire to go into sports as a career, only a tiny minority of those has any interest in sumo wrestling. There are 120 million people in Japan and only ~600 rikishi. You can pointlessly try and argue that the reasons people give for not wanting to be rikishi are actually invalid, as if people don't know what they want, or you can accept that sumo is and always will be a very niche interest.

>>235494
They don't want to be rikishi because the lifestyle isn't being advertised to them constantly the same way being a Youtuber is by the smartphones that are plastered to their faces 24/7. The JSA could do something about that by pushing for more beyaslop to reach out to youngsters but they won't because Hakkaku is a faggot who thinks kissing government ass will save sumo.

>>235495
They don't want to be rikishi because it sucks. Most Japanese boys don't become Youtubers either, they get normal jobs and have normal lives instead of joining professional sumo. That's how things have always been. Sumo wrestlers have never been common.

>>235496
Again you're saying it sucks when you yourself are not a rikishi and have never been a rikishi.

>>235497
I know that a lot of jobs suck despite never have done them. I wouldn't want to work as a meat packer or a toilet cleaner either. People avoid certain jobs because they're unappealing, and currently, all but 600 young men in Japan are avoiding sumo because it's unappealing. Are you a rikishi? Why not?

>>235493
>>hope you pick a stable you like, because you can’t ever change
>Literally a non-issue.
How many of Hakuho’s deshi have left sumo? It’s none, by now, I think?

>I like my stable, good bunch of guys
>what’s this? A new rikishi? I bet he’ll fit right in!
>Oh no, this kid is psychotic and, because he’s higher up on the banzuke than me, I can’t say shit.

>>235498
I was never presented with any opportunities to get into any sports when I was younger, and only learned about sumo in my 30s.

>>235500
So you're talking absolute shit then, OK.

>>235499
Anon, half of the old Miyagino stable left during Hakuho's suspension. Lots of them quit within weeks.

>>235500
>in my 30s.
Oh, so you’re just a bitchy, bitter old man.
All of a sudden your posts make way more sense.

>>235499
>It’s none, by now, I think?
lol, meant to write “nine”.

>>235500
>The youngsters should join the army and fight for my political causes!
>They just should, OK!
>No, I'm not going to join, I'm going to sit at home and watch them get blown to bits.
You're more of a boomer than Hakkaku is.

>>235498
>all but 600 young men in Japan are avoiding sumo because it's unappealing

How many rikishi were there at the height of sumo? Like in the 80s/90s? I don’t think it ever topped 1000.

>>235505
So go to the sumo school at the kokugikan and "save" the youngsters since you clearly know what they want better than they do

Im sure they'll enjoy the incoherent shrieking of a virtue signaling wagie

>>235501
From what I've seen the lifestyle really doesn't seem all that bad, that's all I'm saying. Free rent, free utilities, free food. Those are some ridiculous perks. Physical training isn't a big deal, I go to the gym and lift weights. I bet you're unemployed.

>>235507
>wagie
You’re telling on yourself, you unemployed loser.

>>235509
And yet I am not a neet. See if you can figure it out, big brain.

>>235506
The most ever was 943 in 1994, when Takanohana was one of the most recognized celebrities in Japan.

>>235510
That means you're a student, aka too young to have a fully developed brain yet. You really shouldn't be giving out opinions when you're functionally retarded you know.

>>235508
The free room and board a rikishi gets is the same as the free room and board a child gets. You eat what your dad puts on the table for you. You get a room in your dad's house which you have to share with your siblings. If you want to do anything, you have to ask your dad's permission. When you go to the gym, you go because you want to. You go at a time that's convenient to you and you train in the way that you want to. You're your own boss. Most people prefer the autonomous decision-making and freedom to do as they please that being an adult allows you, even if they do have to pay the price for that and work a job to fund their lifestyle. Most people aren't prepared to live like a sumo wrestler does, even if they do get free food.

>>235512
He already admitted he’s over thirty. If he’s that old and not a neet, it means he’s receiving government disability assistance. Probably explains his shitty disposition.

>>235513
>Most people
>Most people
>Most people
How many rikishi does sumo need exactly? If just 1 in every 100,000 kids became a rikishi the sport would be swamped. "Most people" aren't a factor in this. If the JSA can't scrape just a couple hundred extra youngsters from across the entirety of Japan, they're simply doing a dogshit job. Hakkaku is doing a dogshit job.
>But he's kissing ass and not having any scandals!
That won't magically make good things happen.

>>235514
Yeah I've found that people who don't work or have kids tend to be complete wretches. "I'm a piece of shit who brings the world down and there's nothing you can do about it!" tends to be the angle they shoot for to get their "wins" in life.

>>235511
>The most ever was 943 in 1994, when Takanohana was one of the most recognized celebrities in Japan.
That’s less than I would have thought.

>>235515
Then the JSA has always been doing a dogshit job. Osaka Sumo and all the other pre-unification groups were also doing dogshit jobs. In all of Japanese history, nobody has ever done a less than dogshit job at getting youths interested in sumo. Hundreds, maybe thousands of men. Glorious yokozunas and skilled PR men, brand ambassadors and community outreach gurus. None of them have ever managed to make sumo significantly more popular than it was in the 90s. Does this seem reasonable to you? Do you really think that not just Hakkaku, but every chairman and authority figure involved in sumo for all of history has been incompetent? That none of the people working for the JSA are as smart and good at problem solving as you are? Face facts. The problem is with sumo, not with sumo's management.

>conflate multiple anons
>feel superior to this non-existent person you've constructed in your head

It's so pathetic I almost didnt want to point it out lol
Embarrassing

>>235517
Youtube is an incredible way to reach out to youngsters that isn't being fully taken advantage of. That's my point.

>>235448
to belabor the point, I started to look at whether or not the current makuuchi roster had meaningful success or expectations of success before entering the NSK. I only made it like halfway through before I got bored, but this is what I have:

-Aonishiki took "3rd at the 2019 Sumo world junior championships in Sakai in middle weight"
-Wakamotoharu, Wakatakakage - grandchildren of komusubi Wakabayama
-Ichiyamamoto finished top 16 in the 2016 National Sports Festival
-Shishi took multiple bronze medals (2014-15) in the ISF's Sumo World Championship
-Hakuoho - Hakuho Cup winner, 2-time high school yokozuna, Corporate Yokozuna etc
-Midorifuji won the 2013 All-Japan junior championships for his weight division.
-Takerufuji "Individual runner-up at several national events"
-Tochitaikai won the 2014 National Middle School Sumo Championship
-Churanoumi won the 2010 Junior World Championship and the 2011 National Sports Festival
-Kinbozan was runner-up in the 2019 All-Japan Sumo Championship, winner of 2020 National Student Sumo Championship
-Ura won the under-65kg division at the 2008(?) National Student Sumo Championship
-Kayo finished top 8 in the 2021 All-Japan Sumo Championship
-Oshoma was student yokozuna, Kanazawa National Tournament winner etc
-Onosato - obvious
-Daieisho was a semifinalist of the 2011 National Inter-High tournament
-Endo won the 2012 All-Japan Sumo Championship and the 2012(?) National Sports Festival
-Tobizaru won a late-2000s National Middle School Sumo Championship; couldn't find the year

>>235516
That was during the "literally torture 15 year olds to death" era. Imagine the number if Takanohana's popularity had come now

>>235519
The JSA is getting better at YouTube, Hakkaku (and the rest of the board) just wants to make sure that the videos don’t make the rikishi look foolish.
>guys having fun while training?
Fine
>guys enjoying a communal meal?
Fine
>one video after another of supposed “professional athletes “ doing nothing but gorging themselves?
Guys, there’s more to the sport than this…

>>235522
What if they were having fun gorging themselves?

>>235521
If Onosato and Hoshoryu develop a compelling rivalry, I bet we’ll see numbers increase.

>>235519
They don't want a load of useless eaters who show up just to try the chanko, or perverts signing up to try and sniff the okami-san. They don't want to deal with a revolving door of teenagers joining, becoming quickly disillusioned by the fact that real stable life isn't as good as the Youtube propaganda made it seem. Realistically, many stables lack the infrastructure to deal with multiple new recruits - if sumo returned to Takanohana-era numbers, it would be equivalent to every stable taking on half again as many men as they currently have. It's better for everyone if the only people who join sumo are people who genuinely love sumo and are motivated to try and succeed. That sort of person doesn't need to watch parasocial beyaslop to get interested in sumo. In fact, I'd wager quite a lot of money that the majority of the beyaslop audience is comprised of women.

>>235524
Onosato alone is going to bring in a good few youngsters. He ticks all the boxes
>Japanese
>Already more yusho than K*senosato
>Literally never lowered in rank once in his entire career

>>235443
nabatame and kuwae are half, they have japanese nationality. Roga doesn't.

Nabatame being half Thai does explain some things...

>>235524
I'm already compelled
July is going to be hype

>>235540
What, Covid boosters?

>>235542
Those are clearly blood draws, /pol/tard.

>>235545
Why so aggressive? Anon was just wondering what's being done.

>>235546
All rikishi have mandatory blood tests as part of a physical twice(?) a year.

>>235548
I know that, you know that. We didn't always know that, though.

>>235549
Fuck off with your false naivete.

>>235550
>I think everyone else is disingenuous because I am disingenuous
paranoia is the price you pay for being dishonest

>>235551
I think you're a cunt. End of story.

>>235545
Huh? What's wrong with getting additional layers of protection against a deadly disease?

>>235552
You clearly think everyone's a cunt, because me and that Anon are two different people, and the guy you were attacking in the first place is a third. If you smell shit everywhere you walk, check your own shoes.

>>235558
Did you buy a book of aphorisms recently or something? Do me a favor and choke on it, faggot.

>>235559
I think you could do with buying a book on anger management. Whatever's causing you so much frustration in your personal life has nothing to do with me or anyone else in this thread, and impotently lashing out isn't going to make you feel better.

>>235561
>has nothing to do with me
And yet you keep replying... You replied to a conversation that had nothing to do with you. And as was said, there are at least three other Anons in play here. So why join in on something you clearly find so distasteful? As long as you keep adding wood to the fire, I will keep burning this mother down until there is nothing left. Count on it.

>>235563
You chose to be needlessly aggressive to someone when it was nothing to do with you. You don't care if people are replying to you or talking amongst themselves, because you're feeling angry and edgy and want us all to know about it. You can scream and shout and get as riled up as you like, all you're doing is making yourself look stupid.

>>235565
And all you're doing is wasting your own time trying to pretend like you have the moral high ground on 4chan.

WENS BANZUKAY

>>235567
June 30, 2025

>>235566
And you're wasting your time ranting at strangers. If you think time-wasting is so silly and pointless, you can just stop whenever you like.

>>235569
I'm only ranting because they ranted first. Stop pretending you care, and I'll stop talking at you.

>>235568
When's the last time it was released on June 30th in a given year???

>>235571
2014

>>235572
Sugoi...

>>235570
You're the only one that's been ranting since the guy who thinks Hakkaku isn't handling beyaslop properly.

>>235574
Incorrect. I said a few sentences then some guy who thinks he's the next Emerson started writing paragraphs. The ranting started on the other side.

>I post a sumo image and leave the thread for a couple hours
>dumbfucks shitpost back and forth forever
仕方がない

>>235575
Writing paragraphs? Are you sure you haven't just wandered into the wrong thread?

>235578
If you're not even going to try anymore, you don't get a (You).

>>235578
>>235579
Just kiss already

yokozuna tochigiyama

More like "touches-guys-yama"

>>235582
Where did you find this picture of me???

>>235582
>is wanted for questioning by the police regarding multiple instances of chikan