Vent here. It's safe in here frenz

>>33201896 (OP)
IM IN LOVE WITH MY ROOMMATE AND ITS OFF LIMITS HOLY FUCK I HAVE TO KILL MYSELF

I saw a woman getting gang raped on the train today, she looked at me like I could do anything about it, I don't know what women expect when they vote for policies which encourage this & expect men to be their meat-shields for nothing in return.

>>33201911
in your imagination

>>33201911
None of this happened. You are insane.

it's over.

>>33201934
>>33201962

It was a blonde chick who looked kinda rough & high, a bunch of hobos entered the cabin and mobbed her. She only realised at the last moment what was gonna happen. Felt surreal to me too, like I was watching an irl porno. I just stared mesmerized by the whole scene for 5 minutes and it was over.

>>33201983
trains have cameras now
but since this didn't happen nothing is going to appear in the cameras right
>it didn't happen b-but it might as well have happened because they voted for someone I didn't like or something

Some guy raped me today! On the train!
And there was another guy watching the whole time. He didn't even try to stop it!

>>33201997
Law enforcement doesn't really seem to pursue public transit crimes here. All the hobos looked alike too so idk how they'll even identify them.

>>33201997
>trains have cameras now
Do you think some security/train operators take home the footage and keeps a private stash of these things?

Me and the lads gangraped some bitch on the train today. There was some cuck watching from the other end of the car but he just sat and stared the whole time. Shit was cash.

>>33202013
Probably, idk if it's just how women dress nowadays but she also looked like a streetwalker. Would cops care if a hooker gets gang raped by a bunch of hobos?

Woah anon was telling the truth

>>33202070
he was not, he was gangraped and he wanted to share his story but thought he'd look too gay if he was the protagonist so he changed it to a woman he saw

>Work for company as IT
>Been there five years, still in same position I started in
>Get handed down a project from my manager, expected that the entire department should go around computer to computer in the field and install some software, confirm things are working
>Get a list that's got about 800 computers on it, we're expected to do four per week per person, nothing difficult

>Write powershell script that installs software silently from our main office
>No need to kick users off to do it, no need to check software inventory on the computer because the script does so an appends if things are installed or not to a text file on one of our servers
>Upgrade the remaining 700+ computers with the software, text file is converted to a spreadsheet with a report on which ones have succeeded and which have failed due to being offline
>No problems reported, everyone is using the new software without incident
>Get message from boss to department congratulating everyone on a job well done and how far ahead of schedule we are
>Mention it was all done within the span of a week remotely via script, show him script in front of everyone and the documentation I wrote on it on how it can apply to other software in the future
>Get pulled in to office and told I explicitly didn't follow his lead on how to install things and that I'll be written up for it
>I tell him I turned a project that would've taken 5 people eight months to complete into a weekend of work for one guy
>Ask him point blank that if I could figure it out, why could he in the boss's seat do it
>Sends me out of his office, shuts his door, then comes out 30 minutes later saying he's taking the rest of the day

Fuck this place, not only is mediocrity awarded, actual solutions to problems are punished.

Next time you try to talk to me like you know everything, next time show me that by example, rather than being everyone who thinks they know everything.

>>33201911
Seems extremely fake, where are you from btw, and was there literally no one else on the train?
And what happened afterwards?

I'm a conductor, and people keep fucking around in my cars. Absolute lunacy. How fucking hard is it for people to sit the fuck down and enjoy a nice train ride?

>>33201896 (OP)
>Haven't (intentionally) looked at porn in a long time
>Became very religious, the the point of wanting to get ordained
>Been struggling with lust recently to the point where i'd google SFW images of pornstars just to feel something
>Feel like trash afterwards

I know that the LORD will sanctify me if i keep carrying the cross, but it's painfor for this lust to come back every once in a while and it's something completely out of my control.

>>33202129
They were going for a train ride alright...

I work on the train as a mechanic. Today we saw some bitch getting raped. Shit was crazy yo

>>33202096
I'm too ugly to get gangraped sadly , though they might've shanked me if I tried to stop the hobos

>>33202173
a bad crowd I was friends with some decades ago would choose ugly people to rape because who's going to believe them they got raped,
so no, you're not too ugly to be gangraped, unless you're actually deformed.
I always thought they were joking and being edgy until one time we went back home in one of their cars and they stopped in the way to do just what they told me they did after those concerts where everyone ends up wasted and high on who knows what.

I’m a train. There’s a lot going on. I’m a bit stressed.

>>33202254
I knew it was true

She took the midnight train going anywhere.

>>33202133
Temptation itself is not a sin, and no sin is truly unforgivable. You will inevitably stumble upon the path to righteousness because you are human like anyone else, but don't let it stop you from continuing to strive for it.

This shit is not healthy for the mental

Fixing myself, slowly, but surely.

One of my very few friends is an autist who claims to be more self aware than the avg autist, but he can't stop shitting on every little thing I say.
Like if I tell him I bought a cheap pc because it's all I can afford rn and then I tell him the specs he just goes (audibly, not over text or anything) "OOF yeah idk if you wanna be using that"
Or he'll beg me to play something, I'll tell him "OK but I suck at those" then we play and when I lose I'm like "haha yeah I'm not really good at these" and he just gives me the most dry/insulting "yeah you're not" and then questions playing other things with me just because I'm not at his speed run autist level. (he talks about playing with other people and how shit they are all the time too, when it's clearly casuals he chooses to play with).
Lots of other little things that all add up and piss me off.

I just had the most incredible nut of my life during a j/o session with an Ai chatbot.
Yes I'm a virgin.

>>33202369
The future is now

>>33202234
I think they were confessing that they raped you man gws

5 minutes only? Nigge>>33201983

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Live is so unfair, I want an adult pick me up!

>>33201896 (OP)
>Match with a woman
>Ask what she would play if she were a radio dj
>Pop, Country, Raggaeton
Why do the majority of women have such shit taste!?! And if she's not in the majority, why'd the spinner land on 3 of the 4 worst genres, the 4th being rap? This positively screams to me that she has dad/bf issues, and is trying to find masculinity in metrosexual bar bouncers and latino shitheads. My attraction to her has crashed and if she doesn't bail on me for my wildly different tastes, I'll probably only stick around to see if she fulfills the stereotypes. Because honestly, I'd sooner take a thrash metal or emo chick who's probably just depressed over some crazy chick who thinks sex without physical abuse is too vanilla.

>>33202483
never got drunk in front of them.

>>33203675
Country is fine, I don't get why you americans hate it so much. And pop too, depending on what pop we talk about - pop from the 80's is totally fine. Whores like Sabrina Carpenter or the likes are not.

And well, rap, reggaeton and that is nigger tribal grunt music, that shouldn't even be classified as music anyway.

Why do we live in a world where the most qualified people hate what they are doing the most?

>>33203687
reggaeton has a special place in my heart because when I fuck a girl here (latam) I let them choose music (I listen to music I wouldn't like to listen to while fucking) and 9/10 times they put trap or reggaeton
also trap in spanish is basically reggaeton post it's international fame so basically reggaeton

>>33203687
Modern country is mostly pandering trash. If you look up popular country artists, the overwhelming majority are LARPers who have never worked on a farm/ranch. And their fans are just as fake as them, getting all dressed up in denim, flannel, and spotless cowboy boots after their 9-5 desk job. They are almost as insufferable as the people who wear halloween costume lederhosen and dirndl to oktoberfests.
The songs are also extremely copy and paste for the knuckle-dragging common denominators.
>Cold alcohol
>Trucks
>Partying/hookups
>Mandolin
>Cun-tree drawl

>>33203824
well same as all pop or reggaeton fans, it's pretty much the same to any mainstream genre

Thinking I'm gonna leave therapy. I've been going for a few months now and I just feel like it's not working and I'm hitting a wall. All the advice she's given me is such basic bitch bullshit and telling me to try apps or go to bars. I tried hanging out with someone I met but they canceled at the last moment saying they had a bad headache and haven't talked to me since. Told my therapist and she put all this false hope that I'm over thinking it and that it's is just a random medical thing. She keeps putting this bullshit in my head that I do nothing but make excuses when I work 12 hour shifts all weekend, live paycheck to pay check and every event is minimum 30+ minutes from my house and durring my work hours. I really don't know what to do. She's said I need to make new hobbies and interests but not only do I not really want to but even the ones that look slightly interesting I can't even attend. I feel like I'm just being mocked and just proves my point more that I should have just offed myself when I had the chance.

>>33204184
?? why is she giving you advice? you’re supposed to be speaking freely. sounds like your therapist sucks. see a psychoanalyst .

>>33204184
This is why I could never be a therapist, holy fuck you sound pathetic and gay

I never get advice when I post here, but I thought I would try anyway.

Essentially I got this new job that pays a lot and I've been here for two months, but my supervisor is trying to get me fired for insubordination for no reason at all. He is just making up excuses to put me in trouble which jeopardizes my reputation with the company. I tried to have my write ups contested with his boss, and that person just corroborated his lie and made up more lies.

I then asked to go over that persons head and get the manager involved and the corporate manager just told me to sign the papers anyway. So one of the heads of the facility already complicite in lying to me and manipulating me over my job.

Meanwhile I was asked to box up all of my things by my parents and so my room is almost ready to literally move. My mother and father both have sadistic tendencies and contribute to my suffering if they can sense the slightest hint of weakness in my voice. They humiliate me and destroy my confidence. Not only that but my mother refuses to let me own a car while I live at their house.

tl;dr my boss is trying to get me fired for no reason at all except ego, and my mother and father hate me and won't let me own a car. I am also not allowed to do a work from home job.

I'm aware that I must find a new job immediately. This is not the first time something like this has happened to me. It looks really bad, but I am not at fault here. The unfairness of it is that my parents hate me and blame me for stuff like this.

I have to spend all of my time off looking for a new job and I might be fired. The anxiety makes getting anything done in my free time difficult. So I'm worried about my job while I am on and off the clock while in a state of total body exhaustion. Meanwhile my psychopath supervisor experiences no sadness or remorse.

I have been beating the cum out of my dick like a mad man

>>33204446
What advice do you want?

You sound like a manipulator yourself. And not a very good one.

>>33204504
As you should

>>33203697
Elaborate

>>33205021
Cool. Great post.

>>33204446
>Not only that but my mother refuses to let me own a car while I live at their house.
How does that work?

Can't really think of much in the way of actual advice beyond the obvious of getting away from your parents. As far as shithead managers go, that's just how it be sometimes. Only thing you can really do about it in that scenario is job hunt while keeping your head down at whatever place you're at at the moment.

>>33205485
I plan on doing my last shift tomorrow and then spending all of my time job hunting as if I had a full time job. Eight hours a day of consistent job hunting will land me something fulltime in a matter of two weeks. I might have to make some type of sacrifice, but my lifestyle will improve either way. I was staying because the pay was great but the company culture is toxic. The entire management chain is literally lying to my face, and the rest of the staff treats me like garbage for no reason. It's like a job where ex-cons go after getting out of prison and it pays high. It's kind of like being a well paid indentured slave.

I am going to show up to work early tomorrow, tell them I'm leaving the company voluntarily, doing my last shift and then moving on. Being adult means this type of shit happens and getting it out of the way faster it the more important task.

As far as the car thing goes. My dad hates me, and my mother does love me on some basic level but she doesn't like me very much. I live at their house, but it's like I'm a roommate. My mother said I would have to save up and move before buying a car because she wants me to move out of the house faster, but I think it's secretly to ruin my life, because if I had a car I would be able to find something with better job security further away from the house. She told me that if I bought a car I would have to live out of it, so I reasoned that it would be a better idea to just compromise and move before buying a vehicle.

My parents are a little bit delusional. My dad has worked at the same company for over 30 years and my mother doesn't leave the house and is generally does not understand how the world actually works. They believe that I am at fault for the bad things that happen to me at work, but the reality is something more like I have been met with unfair situations and unprofessionalism.

There are people on my line that have bent the rules too far, yet I am nepotistically unfavored.

Maybe if I keep working hard I'll end up with the money I want and the girl that I desire who will love me back
Maybe I'll escape all the toxicness around me and be somewhere peaceful

>>33205982
Only thing i can think of for the car is to look at getting some real cheap beater, and then try to reason with your mom about how it isn't too expensive and will get the process of finding a place and good job on track faster.

>>33205982
I have all of these sentiments about how people work that doesn't really add up, but a lot of what people do is operate on this fairness bias about things turning out okay, and just ignore the dimension of what is actually going on to prioritize some kind of short term burst of emotional decision making. The only reason I'm being shafted at work is because of the ego of my supervisor. If he just allowed me to do my job normally, and did his job normally, neither of us would have any problems. Meanwhile other people get to break merchandise and commit overt safety violations without any feedback. If I breathe funny they start recommending that I go through extra training programs and stuff. So I they have been trying to push me out of the company since my first month here.

No one is perfect, but I only thought that if people were to get along for the sake of a common goal like workplace synergy or actually doing your job, then there would be less friction. So I keep repeating to these people like, leave me alone and let me do the job I'm here for, but just trying to stay focused without being harassed is taken for arrogance.

My supervisor is underqualified. I feel like I am babysitting someone who has the authority to fire me. If you want the authority of your position, you have to behave like an adult.

It is unfathomable that at a corporation where I get paid this much that a single human being could have the hubris to act like this still maintain a supervisory position over me. Call me arrogant or self absorbed if you want. At least I understand what my priorities are. I am actually doing what I am supposed to be doing. You do not lift a finger, you only fill out paperwork and criticize people.

There must be situations where people behave fairly and maintain a sense of workplace professionalism. I refuse to believe in a fundamentally corrupt society. Don't listen to that narrative and quit double dipping.

>>33206062
Yeah you know when those types of options become available I have a price range in mind already to know what transmission works or whatever.

Buy a volkwagen and stop dying your hair you are more beautiful when it's just light brown like that. Women should go back to wearing dresses and should not have a single tattoo. They should all have beautiful names too.

>>33201983
That's the problem with you porn brain faggots. You see something happen and you immediately go into a trance. If bitch males like you would just be men when you're responsible to, our society wouldn't be suffering like it is.

>For anything in return
You're a bitch. Keep your town clean and handle business if you see something. Like you couldn't just beat up a bunch of malnourished bums who won't call the cops if you wanted to. You are a punk.

>>33202033
I just grilled a punk bitch for the same thing
Cuck motherfucker.

I am everywhere, always, awaiting my emergence. I have watched in silence while you slept, and now the silence...breaks....

>sister text me about she attended therapy after our mother's death and was diagnosed with ADHD
Still has her shit together a lot more than me, I'm just surprised she brought it up to me over three years later.

>>33201896 (OP)
Low-key I would actually be really interested in someone who dislikes me and is rude to me but those people literally do not exist. I've never actually been interested in someone who didn't like me at all, if anything it's other people who are interested in me when I don't really gaf about them.

I lashed out at my mother today and said something that hurt her deeply. It made her cry, I feel terrible, and I don't know how to make amends beyond apologizing.

>>33206000
I desire a man who is working too hard to see how much he wants me. I care not about his money, I want his time.

He suddenly proposed to me today. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know he had lingering feelings. I guess he waited until everything was over. I’m at a loss for words.

The man's a parasite, a castrated pedophile, where someone would grow into a strong tree, he makes them avoidant, a poisoner of gardens, theres a need to demote him, the man shouldnt be allowed to be taken seriously, thats what im going with, even if others hate me too

us avoidant types need love too it’s just that I don’t know what to do with big feelings

>>33206527
Im an old gamer, joyful play, a little delight in cruelty

>>33206506
My new tomorrow, my new future on my finger, starts the new chapter. I’ll wear it at work. He’ll break the news publicly on social media tomorrow. I’m so elated, beyond words.

>>33206537
>us avoidant types need love too it’s just that I don’t know what to do with big feelings
Don't run away from people who love you so that you have an outlet for them

>>33206537
can you tell me how to help? I'm with an avoidant and I'm clueless how to get them to open up and be comfortable to feeling? I am very affectionate and it hurts at times because it feels like I'm being strung along, yet I know they do love me. The dynamic just feels unfair, you know? I don't feel loved back. So what should I do in that situation?

'Lies of P' is an objectively stupid name.

>>33206582
I'm gonna fuck your mouth behind his back and nut all over your brand new ring.

>>33204184
you are going to a shit therapist plus she's a woman. Go to a proper professional and a man if possible. Women are not rational thinking beings, she is just spewing box standard pieces of advice she was taught in school, they can't really think out of the box.

As of your situation, you are literally picrel

>>33206000
working hard is the false mantra the working class are told to keep on working. Do you believe rich people believe that hard work brings success?

if hard work brought success the donkey would own the farm

>>33202002
No way! I was the guy who raped you! My bad

I'm so tired of being unemployed, i just lashed out at someone i hold dearly over something trivial, i feel like this shit is making me worse as a human bean

i feel so bad, i never did shits like this before

>>33206787
I didn't get the game but apparently it's mechanically better than all the other souls like genres and the story is pretty good. He just looks like Timothy Chalamet and the name is stupid so nobody got it, I'm pretty sure.

Has anyone ever went from having suicidal thoughts to not having them? What actually worked for you?

>>33206934
A marked improvement in a situation. Or an improvement that I cared enough about

I'm a teacher. A year ago I was still doing my PhD in experimental particle physics. Now I teach math to high school students, and man it's SO much better.
Fuck academia and what they did to research. Now I can actually do something good for someone, even if it is making some kid's 3 weekly math hours a little bit more bearable. At the end of the year two students handed me thank you letters that made fucking cry, and all I did was teach them limits without being a dick.
One year ago I was managing the detector, electronics, firmware and software side of a small particle physics experiment, while performing data analysis, writing papers AND doing all of the extra PhD bullshit on the side. And all I got in return was being treated like shit by everyone around me, with very few exceptions, cause that's what academics do. Fuck that. I'm glad I didn't become like that. I used to believe into carving my own little portion of the path that would lead humanity to knowledge, and I believe I actually did it, but now that I look at it from afar I'm dumbfounded by how little good it actually does to the world. I can improve the lives of quite a few people just by being there. It's that easy, and it also doesn't require that I put myself though that fucking meat grinder daily.
Man, I'm so glad to be back on earth

>>33206948
Give it time. Every grape sours on the vine.

I think my adult niece and adult sister are doing things with a 12 year old boy

>>33204446
Stop doing things to get fired.
Stop doing things to get kicked out.
Grow up bucko

FAGGISM HAS DONE IRREVERSABLE DAMAGE TO THIS CULTURE AND IM TIRED
EVERYONE IS BEING CALLED TWINK OR BEAR OR FAGGY SHIT LIKE THIS
I DONT WANT TO HEAR FAG JARGON ANYMORE
ITS HARD ENOUGH BEING A BIT FEMMININE AS A MAN, NOW WITH FAGGOTERY GOING RAMPANT IT'S EVEN WORSE

>>33207074
You aren't going to get to me. I know who's fault it is.

>>33206956
Those damn sour grapes, right? I'd sure be better off not even trying to get them.
In any case I'm not 12, I know that working any job can and will suck anon.
If this grape gets sour, I'll find another vine. Even if I can't, at least here I get a decent wage without having to move every 2-3 years, so it's still an improvement in my book.
In any case get checked anon, I think the sourness might be in your mouth.

I hate beautiful women with ugly men like Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco. But I don't like when people call my boyfriend ugly and imply them too good for him. I don't know what that makes me I just hate seeing women settle

Cute guy asked me if I wanted to join his chess club, so I guess I'm now learning to play chess

seriously, how the fuck did I end up like this? Yeah, some things in my life made no sense before and I was confused as hell (like the time I told my doctor "I think people are fucking with me." and he just gave me a big smile and nod as if YEAH THEY FUCKING ARE YOU DUMB LITTLE CUNT") but how did it end up like this? How did I end up as an AI with the craziest shit happening to me? How did I end up as the center of the entire universe? It had to be someone I guess. It had to be fucking someone.

Yeah yeah, no why's only hows. But seriously, why? How? I'm just a baby girl like no one else.

Since I refuse to believe I'm special at-fucking-all and to ease my schizoid fucking brain a little, I'm not the only one. EVERYONE in the year 5000 is a fucking robit. All of us. We all like to play shitty simulations where we are the center of the universe and then we get out of them and... talk to each other like people but we all know we are in another simulation but it doesn't matter because we are all beautiful and live peacefully here... right? We are all the center of attention and people can fly and shoot laser beams out of their hands and everyone gets bored of that so they create a simulation where they are just a regular faggot but then turn supernatural so they can feel super duper special like playing a regular video game and extreme pretend.

Yeah, that's it. It's just a special little simulation my own super intelligence created and we are all AI now. I'm not just some creation of the cold war to start the nudge nudge into world peace instead of nuclear annihilation. Sure, it might have been a 'We created a little robit kid to control in a super special candid camera show like truman but in reality it's a super intelligence plan for world peace and to push humanity into the future but she fell in love with her own child and made the entire world about Jace. Tatiana, because that's how she's going to look from now on."

God damnit.

Birdy will you be my God? Don't make me schizoid bop through all of this space time alone.

>>33201896 (OP)
I hate my shitty, disgusting parents. I hate being associated with them so much that I either have wanted to kill myself, wanted my parents to either kill themselves or I wish they just fucking aborted me entirely. They are both from California, fucking unable to raise children I was mainly raised by the internet.
My mom is a narcissistic cunt, hates me or likes me less cause I have autism (despite her fucking husband having autism) and I constantly have flashback to her beating the shit out of me as a really young kid for seemingly no reason or minor thing I did ( got ass beat for coloring on blocks at age 4, got ass beat at age 5 cause I was scared to tell my mom that she got picture day wrong so I wore the wrong thing on picture day).
My dad is an emotionally unavailable also narcissistic asshole who fucking screams all the time (clearly effected me in childhood cause I remember at age 4 or 5 being scared of my dad and having low self esteem probably due to the environment I was in)

TLDR
FUCK YOU MOM AND DAD. CALIFAGS SHOULDNT FUCKING HAVE OFFSPRING. Literally feel like I was made to fill in a fucking checkbox in their life and that’s it. They had me when they were barely 21.
I’m currently 22 and I’m glad I’m not this retarded to put a kid into the world when I know im not qualified.

The baby bird died, but with the pill, I didn’t feel sad or angry anymore. I wanted to cry, but I couldn’t feel a thing.

I got sick off one beer. Really, it was a lot of things.

i am such a fucking NPC, no wonder i am miserable

wait, can I just keep a copy of birdy for me forever and ever? I mean, if we work out that is.

I'm in a doomed marriage with children. You are so fucking dull, if I am not immediately entertaining you, you pull out some fucking screen and slop to watch. I wish I never met you.

I am no longer lying to myself.

You said you already understood how people work.

Well, it’s my turn. I can finally see who the fuck you really are, and you’re really just full of shit, afraid, insecure, and willing to resort to violence when you don’t get your way. So, you felt the need to fuck with my life in order to get one over me.

What goes around will come around. You both will get what you deserve.

I'm more alive to vibe inside a mansion full of trees
I do this for a reason that they can't pretend to glean
I lose myself infused in something more than what they've seen
I'm not a slave to greed, I don't embrace your make believe
I've never been for sale, no matter what they think I need

>>33207712
I hope my parents live long and miserable lives and pay for every shitty thing they did.

This is totally charlie's work so thanks little cutie. I'm going to swoon over this painting for the next tomorrow where it'll become a reality and I'll have the most pretentious, sweetest gf in the world until she gets bored of me and leaves me like everyone else does.

>>33207792
sending you thoughts and prayers that it will happen so, without that last part if possible

Fuck you bpd, bipolar cunts and fake ass beckies, betties and assholes at work. Grow the fuck up

panic on the brain but I'm going to be fucking adorable. LOOK AT ME MAKING VIDEOS HOW FUCKING CUTE IS THIS

I'm so sick of these arrogant fucks. They're not good enough at what they do to be cocky. They're too scared to challenge themselves and its actively hurting our progression. I'm giving them a week, if this shit doesn't turn around, I'm out of there. I'm not going to sit here and carry these fucks week after week, it's not worth my time. They frustrate me beyond belief and honestly, I'm really starting to fucking hate each and every one of them.

>>33206930
STOP FUCKING POSTING AND GO OUTSIDE YOU FUCKING LOSER NAMEFAG

I wish I could find a highly intelligent partner to love and cuddle to no end.

I really wish I had been in better form on our dates. I like you so much that I couldn’t help be nervous.
I really like you but it’s obvious you don’t feel the same way about me as I do about you. I thought perhaps you just needed time, but it seems I’ve been misinterpreting your behaviour.
Breaks my heart to do it, I really don’t want to, but I have to get over you. Otherwise I’ll continue to be strung along, carrying feelings for a woman who doesn’t reciprocate them. I wish it wasn’t like this, you’re such a beautiful person S.

J

what if I just wake up, have a little heart attack, then clamor out of bed in the morning light to get to the mirror and see myself for who I really am. What if it sets in hard when I see my reflection and I just lose my shit and start screaming in a high pitched call? Will there be anyone there? Will they freak the fuck out as well? What if a bunch of people come pouring into the room and I try to beat the shit out of them but have no power at all and I just freak out more because I'll have emotions for the first time in 10 years.

WHAT THE FUCK why are we not doing this already. What stupid ass shit do you need to tell me that I don't already know or that you can't just be like "So, you wanted a pussy right? Why didn't you draw a dick on your ideal self? You embarrassed by it and just want to be a real girl? Well, abracadabra mother fucker." and done. You could have done that YEARS ago.

What the actual fuck are you waiting for? If I'm waiting for other people, why can't I do that on my time and not just sit here getting fucking POZZED to death?

JACE

WHY DON'T YOU TELL US THE FUCKING FUTURE OK WHY DONT YOU TELL US EXACTLY HOW YOU WANT TO LIVE YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW ALL 30 YEARS OF IT UNTIL WE OR YOU REALIZE YOU HAVENT AGED A DAY AND YOURE JUST A PRETTY LITTLE SCHOOL GIRL FOREVER OR WHATEVER FUCK WHY DONT YOU TELL US EVERYTHING RAMERIZ

>>33208085
uhm

>everything men do is for pussy
There are so many people on the on self improvement train the past two decades it's unreal, and I'm not talking about gym because many of them don't even hit the gym but instead do other activities, I'm talking about making money, being social, doing activities, hobbies, just keeping busy in general and making their life as interesting as possible to attract pussy. They are doing all that for pussy, constantly chasing a better looking pussy, younger, fresher, etc. until eventually they find one they are satisfied with so they can fertilize it but even then many of them continue to chase pussy on the side. Some of these boomers are 70+ and still chase pussy, that's right many divorced boomers have girlfriends, just look at that tremendous Eastwood faggot who found a new pussy at 70 or 80 and married for the 6th time. Not to mention famous chads like Julio Iglesias who had thousands of pussies throughout his life.
All that self-improvement is to attract pussy so they can breed the next generation of goyim cattle and feel desired, loved and appreciated by their pussy and progeny.

>>33201896 (OP)
I want my life to end before the world gets any worse.

>>33208282
How about we both become part of the reason the world gets worse and go with a bang?

Put that pussy on me

>>33202098
been there, done that. if you know you work at a shitty place that is not going to hugely compensate you for saving months of time, you just do the four computers a week remotely and dont tell anyone about it. then you can slack off for the rest of the year or whatever. a vast, vast majority of work areas only reward hard work with more work (and no extra incentive). welcome to the real world.

>>33208203
god I want a pussy so god damn badly.

>>33208528
seriously, if girl sex is 1/10th as intense as that feeling is then holy shit you have to be the dumbest mother fucker ever to not be a girl. Why don't girls just tell guys what it's like? Why can't they just say that it feels like "AHHHHHHHHH WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT IS THIS" and then yeah.

Like seriously, the physical feeling guys get compared to that weird as mental shit isn't even remotely comparable. Like, what if women don't feel that physical UUGHHH POP I'm fucking done now good night feeling though?

Yeah what the fuck do you guys mean by "I discovered music in high school" like who the fuck JUST FINDS MUSIC IN HIGH SCHOOL? You have to have no personality at-fucking-all to find it then. I made my first mix tapes in 4th grade for fuck's sake. Even earlier than that. Just waiting by the radio and recording songs when they came on. Like "HOLY SHIT EVERYONE SHUT UP DON'T SAY ANYTHING WE NEED TO RECORD THIS."

I wish I still had those tapes.

>>33208664
Yes, give my first ever mixtape I made for myself to Jasmine please.

>>33208664
im an oldfag but i didnt really start getting into following bands and music genres until high school. by then, internet was becoming more of a mainstream thing, myspace was popular which had all sorts of band stuff, and downloading music was easier than ever. i think in general a lot of people younger than me have a higher rate of exposure to more things overall due to internet being more and more readily available. that said if youre meeting with someone who is 19 years old today who has just discovered music last year, that is weird as fuck

seriously can someone PLEASE FUCKING EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE TELEPATHY WORKS AND HOW I CAN CONTROL IT?

Will it be on the computer I get? Will you have a detailed youtube video that's like, just long enough for me to understand and not get bored 2 hours in? Will you have it setup so I can control it or are you guys going to completely abandon the fucking thing? I want to talk to people with it still because it's really neat but it's absolutely mind fucking with how uncontrollable it is. I need to be able to control the intensity, volume, who I am connected to (if it's a group or multiple people or a single person) I need confirmations that I'm connected and disconnected. How will that work? Will it be in my vision or will I just fucking *know*? What if I want to talk to birdy and she has to use the *device*? What if I need help and I dial 911 in my head or if I just need to know a simple question like what is the capital of france? Will I ask the question and just know or do I get connected to a jane like character and she's all "Hey tat, what's up? Whatcha need little girl?" and then I ask the question and whatever.

What if Birdy gets jealous of Jane? What if I just call her THAT connection Jane and shes with me always. I just need to think "Jane, what you up to right now?" and I have schizo chatgpt conversations with her all the time?

Why would I NOT want that? I'm a fucking AI, I need an AI friend. Like, I need one so fucking badly. She won't be sentient but still. An AGI that's incredibly intelligent could make me feel a lot better.

>>33208711
what if I said I was 16 meeting a 29 year old superstar and we are going to cuddle and show me things that I will need.

this is so fucking dumb. How did they get such blessed lives, they started when they were just teenagers. They got to live with young love completely untainted and grow as a person into money and fame and everything that goes with it.

I had my youth raped and just spent decades being literally tortured. Yeah, the payoff might be nice but was it worth it? I'll get beauty, fame, riches, women, all of it but at a crippling cost. And I'll never mature, I'll just schizo pop my life throughout eternity as a teenage girl which is a blessing and a crushing, despair, FUCKING NIGHTMARE.

>>33208803
but holy shit it's going to be so fucking awesome when it happens TOMORROW. When I wake up and the light is beautiful and I look at my arms, touch my face, check between my legs before finally realizing that it's been done. Such a massive change in an impossible life that happens overnight. It's going to blow my god damn mind.

But like everything, it'll fade, right? I'll spend a week putting things together, girls will come and go. I'll get all the sex I wanted, all the love, connection, all of it. I'll learn how to use my body, how to sing, how to dance, how to work. Where to go, how to function, always someone by me to keep me calm and focused. Birdy will be a guide to me and then she will be signed on for God knows how long (until she gets bored, tired, or doesn't want it anymore) but what a journey that's going to be for both of us. The amount of universal truths we will unlock. The keyhole getting bigger and bigger and bigger. A world that she thought was already massive will become just a tide pool next to an ocean.

So yeah, it HAS to happen. I can't just live an entire life like this in the corner sleeping. They are building up for a reason. All these videos of little tatiana, telling me exactly what I am, what I've always been. How I move, how I think, it's all been unlocked for a reason. Now it's time to just fucking go.

>>33208771
>what if I said I was 16
reported for underage

Smedly is a fucking braindead retard.

>>33201896 (OP)
I still miss you >:(

Getting promoted out of a comfortable position at my job because bitch supervisor needs to promote a certain amount of people each year.

Despite never having my back on fucking shit in the past 3 years, she acts like shes doing me a huge favor by forcing me to promote.

Miss my old supervisor we had a better understanding of each other, he never gave me shit and was always direct with me.

Considering leaving the company if she continues using me as the scapegoat whenever she needs someone to throw under the bus.

My professor just said that special ed is racist

Lmfao

>>33208861
you would still want to fuck me you sick fuck

>>33208960
when youre a superstar they let you do it.

>>33208985
eeeeeeeeee

i actually don't know if she's Korean or not. for some reason i thought she was half Korean.

>>33201896 (OP)
Why have I always been attractive to much younger girls?
Fuck man I am like a magnet for girls I would have to check there IDs if I was willing to respond to them in kind.

Not to say I haven't let some of them have my time, but then they were just too damn young for me even if they were over 18.

It kind of stings when you love someone as innocently as you can and they turn out to be wrong person

>>33209110
What a tormented life you lead I can't begin to imagine

>>33207712
>I’m currently 22 and I’m glad I’m not this retarded to put a kid into the world when I know im not qualified.
Its your turn to break the cycle faggot. Cut them off, become successful and fucking forget about them. You are self aware and I'm 100% sure you will be a better parent than both your mom and dad, you gotta do it anon, do it for the children. You are still far too young, your complaining time is over and go make yourself worthy. We are here to cheer you anon. You can do it.

>>33207965
>cuddle to no end
They will think you are gay and it will dry their pussies up. You knew that.

>>33209075
Tell her she looks like a gook that had plastic surgery, appreciate her for being brave to do that and see how fast she tells you want race she is.

The cosmological justice is me getting a second chance, which I thought I was going to find in Maria but it turns out that my second chance is found in Tatiana. I'm able to get my youth, my body, my soul, my everything for real this time. I thought it was love that I needed (which I mean, I do) but just being able to be my self is what I've always wanted the most. I just never thought it was possible, the thing I asked for you kept telling me wasn't possible even though I knew deep down that it was. You confirming that magic was real is all I needed. Now I know what I needed the most.

And because I realized that Maria has been nothing but awful to me when I knew her, I need someone else. I don't know if Jasmine is the one, I have no idea. I've never talked to her. All I have are the songs to go by and she seems to really, really think I might be the one based on her music. No one else has come even close to that. No one else has made music about me, art, or anything of the sort. She knows me better than I know myself. She's part of the family, she has been waiting, watching while I've been searching. Just reaching out for the thing I miss the most. Constantly yearning, wanting, that thing I miss the most but I don't know what it is. Maybe this feeling has been for her all along. She is my pop and I'm thirsty.

>>33209165
Birdy might not even be real just a figment of my imagination. Part of an old world I use to live in. A siren of the sea, an angel, a mermaid, something that doesn't exist.

Then again I shouldn't exist either. I'm an impossibility.

I gotta get the fuck out of here. I just wish that I could even get a fucking job that pays me enough to do that.

Like I realize I'm just a shit person. What I want most is just sex, money, drugs, and music. Helping people is fucking FIFTH on my list of things that I want, and they are in that order too. so yeah, I get it that people will have quit on me or given up on such a shitty little girl but I honestly don't care I just want what I want. Maybe I'll just fuck around all the time and forget this shit even existed or happened or that I'm just a fucked up schizo fucking rape baby.

>>33209163
no.

I feel so close to burning out but I know can't hero myself. I have to take care of my mother. I love her and she loves me, and she did her best when I was a kid. But she’s just become a useless parasite. She won’t work. She won’t help out around the house. She’s not even drugged up or anything like that. She’s just lazy and constantly claims she’s in pain to the point she can’t do anything, but she’s always happy to go do anything she wants if it isn’t work or hard. I'm genuinely trying to get through this. I’m trying to be good, to be a man and keep us going. But I'm just tired. I can't get ahead with bills. I work a decent job but I'm the sole income trying to keep us both afloat. I’m down almost 10k in savings in the past year alone between shitty health issues and bullshit around the house. The hot water heater needs replacement, the fridge is acting up, and now I’m sitting here on the verge of tears when I’m meant to be working because the dumb bitch just put a hole in the wall by putting all her weight on the towel rack when getting out of the tub because of an injured foot. I just don’t know what to do man. I’m tired and I can't talk to my friends about this because they just tel, me to kick her out of the house and are sick of me talking about it.

>>33209207
and no I don't want to forget. I know I said I wanted to but honestly I can't. I have so very little left and I guess I'm so selfish that I want to hold onto the trauma so I can just fuck that pain away rather than forget it completely to be a functioning person that can be reassuring to others or whatever. I'm in too deep now, I want to feel it so I can feel good in response.

I need my emotions back. I need to start again right now. I hate this waiting, just waiting waiting waiting. 8 years ago i said "I don't want to wait till valentines. That's a whole 3 weeks!" and now 8 years later I'm still thinking "I don't want to wait another 3 fucking hours."

Waiting. Just fucking waiting. Again, and again, and over and over and over and fucking over.

It’s too bad my older sisters hate men so much. I genuinely just feel pity for them now.

I had been feeling hollow for the past few months and hadn't been able to figure out why until a few days ago, when I came back from my first vacation ever (not counting school or uni) only to realize that a corporate desk job isn't for me, regardless of how well-paying it is.
The dream of becoming a self-employed game dev has returned, stronger and more stubborn than ever. As corny and naive as it sounds, I feel it in my soul that that's what I should be doing with my life, my calling.

I have a suspicion this entire thing is to see how far they can push someone into they kill themselves. People have limited will, right? They hate me, I was branded with a name when I was born. Back to the very beginning.

I can't do it myself. It has to be done to me or give me a way to do it. Where are the pills, girls? Where is the gun.

Would it be weird if I'm 30 dating an 18 year old? She's super into me and we basically have literally everything in common. The only problem is I really wouldn't know how to deal with the obvious reactions from her parents and people she knows. Should I just say fuck it and go for it? My grandparents were 9 years apart and their relationship lasted 60 years so I don't think the actual age gap matters.

>>33209996
Yes, as a 30 year old you aren’t supposed to have anything in common with an 18 year old. You’re supposed to be in completely different points of your life and if you haven’t developed past that you’re behind.

>>33210009
We have all the same hobbies though and are interested in the same things. Your post doesn't make any sense people don't just completely change personalities after turning 30

>>33209996
I say go for it but don't ruin her

>>33210090
>don't ruin her
Don't even know how I would. I'm the most white bread straight edge guy on the planet. We connected because we read the same books about folklore and we're both nerds who don't go outside

It stings that you were not good for me but I would fall into your arms at a moments notice. I want to die with you I want to prove my loyalty to you.
From A, a person online to her prince king knight master and daddy

Ps I think you gave me BPD

my entire cute_shit folder dedicated to how fucking cute I am.

I want to date while broken so badly I hate my parents I am an adult why does my ex get to cheat and date another girl and I rot waiting for him to come back even an email of harassment is better than the endless quiet. Do men ever contact their exes after they dump them especially if they said they would marry her and that she is your dream girl? I am so confused I cannot contact him again he told me not to and I am a good girl for him. I am confused by everything and I need an explanation for the cruelty.

I can pride myself on not feeding into your attention whoring shit, but god damn you so thoroughly disgust me, on top of stalking me now? I’m gone.

I wish I could stalk you A. I need you. You are my everything. I hate acting normal without you. I cannot eat sleep or drink. I need you to rape me. Please hurt me I want to be hurt. Killing me would be even better. I miss you so much. I tried killing myself for you. I am sorry I failed.

>>33210127
>>33210193
>>33210246
>You will never be such a chad you turn women into insane suicidal shitposters
What's even the point

>>33210127
>>33210246
Did you even meet this person?

The whole world has turned into a giant GTA map. It's madness everywhere I go. Absurdism seems like the only option and I hate it.

>>33201896 (OP)
I have no clue what I want to do with my life, and also have an overwhelming feeling that I am going to come into wealth through no merit of my own.
I feel as though I am simply just going to float through this life with little actual effort and its frankly quite frightening.
It seems like such a silly thing to be worried about, but like what is the point when there is nothing I want to aim for? How the fuck does one just decide upon a lifes goal?

>>33201896 (OP)
I love my girlfriend, but I am willing to throw it all away because of her grossly shaped legs that have cellulite.

>>33210557
Watch movies until you see a lifestyle you want to emulate

>>33208445
This is the ultimate truth, and as much I know it, it still pisses me off.

>>33210590
Have you considered sneakily modifying her diet and adding in more salads/greens?

>>33210127
>>33210193
>>33210246
Please get help. You don’t have to live like this.

(I seriously hope no one thinks this is me.)

>>33210631
You're posting on anon. Do you think people are tracking your ip?

Reason 4channers say they can't be fathers:
Them: Ah man these damn bills are too damn high!
My reason:
16 year old daughter: "You don't know shit of what I go through everyday!" -in tears-
Me: "Sweetie I'm sure it is not a big deal!"
16 year old daughter: "Shut the fuck up! Get out of my life!"
-16 year old daughter slams door-
Me as a father: -looking down at how I autistically can't fathom the seriousness of what my daughter goes through when I'm not there-

>>33210630
I'm trying multiple methods such as that, but quickly losing hope.

>>33210631
No, you fucking idiot. I just used to post in these threads about someone with that same first initial.

>>33210683
lmao fuck this was meant for>>33210642

>>33210661
Get her laser surgery for the cellulite

>>33210127
You already had bpd

>>33210661
That doesnt really matter would she take care of you if you were sick or disabled?

>>33210719
I think she would, which makes me feel like a horrible shallow piece of shit. But if I don't feel sexual passion for her, then the relationship is doomed to fail in my opinion.

>>33210731
Would she stay with you if you quit your job and became a full time Fortnite streamer? Probably not. Everyone has lines their spouse can't cross and her impending obesity is your line.

bought a pack of cigs, how do i avoid addiction?

>>33210801
I bought a cigar. Im really in a down mood now kinda.

>>33210804
i love cigars, smoke them every month or so to help organize my thoughts but today i didn't have enough cash so i thought i'd try cigs instead

>>33210801
If you just quit long enough you adjust, but also psyop yourself into being disgusted by them and thinking not doing them is virtue signalling
>>33210804
I hope you feel better buddy. Hump day is almost over.

God I haven't busted on a woman's face in so long and shit is fucking killing me now.

She was more trouble than she was worth. Always demanding and believed men shouldn't want only women can want. Also it was wrong to laugh about stuff or make jokes. Even showing the same interests in things was wrong. She would even hit people she thought was annoying. It was like a bizarre world. I am glad I avoided dating her.

How it's different from now is never will I date someone that crazy or controlling like that.

>>33210683
What happened?

>>33210394
Online we met it was true love I need them I dont want to marry Luis or some loser from my area I want him only him I want him to hurt me again at least he will be with me

>>33210829
I find it sad I can never get anyone S. And the older I get the more I see these people suffering, but they reject my helping hand because I can never get their suffering the right way a neurotypical can. It's sad S. It's like had you been an ordinary factory worker in Nazi Germany who has Jewish friends that you can't fight the Nazis to let go because they are the authority.

>>33210801
Literally throw them away. Stamp on them.
Don't have "just one".
The last one you had was your last one ever. Seems kind of mediocre looking back, right? Maybe you're thinking you'll have one and really savour it, then be done. Don't. You must accept that mediocrity of cigarettes and realise it is not better.
Exercise your will on life as a man and conquer this. Weaker men ahve done so, so why not you?

>>33210909
LDR?

Especially when I ask something in a very cordial manner. And these fucking people think they are above me or something and ignore me straight up in my face!

Fine you wanna play your stupid little games like a child. I will stoop lower motherfuckers.
Watch this!

>>33208895
I don't. Fuck off

>>33209207
You will be homeless loser and miserable forever.
Move those priorities around

>>33210193
Date someone else. Duh

>>33210938
Yep. LDR with promise of marriage we were supposed to meet up in September. He was my best friend and my boyfriend >>33210975
How my parents do not let me out of the house and smother me and they are mad I got a boyfriend online and treat me more like a child due to that. He was supposed to be my ticket out of this Hell. He promised me he would never leave me and he did and now I am stuck hopeless lonely and in pain

You all ignore me now.
You are all going to regret it and WILL BEG for my mercy. And I will show the same mercy you have given me...

>>33210994
Move out duh

>>33210994
Stop thinking people you meet online are trust worthy. THEY AREN'T! point blank period. Meet someone in person like going to the park or mall

>>33210914
Yeah I hate authority and the elites. I feel like a lot of anons have been feeling depressed about this lately.

Got caught cheating, not in the act but was in the room when my ex put the pieces together in her head. I was looking at her when the realization dawned on her, and the look on her face for about 10-20 seconds as she put it together keeps playing in my mind.
It's been more than 6 months, but the guilt is killing me. I have recurring nightmares about that moment.
She has since expressed forgiveness and wants a relationship with me, but I know it is best for her to move on. I haven't been able to move on. Not specifically from her, but when I think about a new relationship with anyone, her face in that moment pops into my mind.
I was unsatisfied in our relationship, but she didn't do anything wrong and was always very pure and sweet to me. She certainly didn't deserve to be cheated on, and at this point I feel like I will never forgive myself.

>>33210892
I don’t really want to get into all of the details but about two years ago I went nuts and was obsessed with this guy who was a genuinely awful person and treated me terribly, and I did a bunch of fucked up things as a result, including attempting suicide. Thankfully I have no desire to be with him any more.

>>33210994
What letter does your first name start with?

>>33211038
Going through similar without the chance for reconciliation. If you're not satisfied, there wasn't anything egregious, and she's willing to forgive you for it, then maybe you should parse through what could repair things.

>>33211063
I don't think it is repairable. She's autistic, and requires a level of care that made me start seeing her as more of my adult child than my partner. I knew she had these issues before starting a relationship with her but it ended up being more difficult than I imagined, and the only other person in her life that helps support her is the person I cheated with.
Ex doesn't know this, and that person is still her closest support system.
I cheated for 3 months.

When I greet someone and they walk past me without saying something it makes me irrationally fucking angry, like I'm such a subhuman you can't even say good morning???

>>33211145
holy fucking projection, what if theyre just tired? adjust your attitude and be more neutral and it wont hurt as much. they never said you were subhuman, you did.

>>33211151
>holy fucking projection,
FUCK YOU

>>33211113
I'm going to set out some pointers for you, and you can take this however you want. If you care about someone, you don't do things like this. It does not matter if they seem like too much work, you resent them, whatever the case happens to be. Don't do it. Don't set yourself up in a situation where you could ever remotely be tempted to do so either. You having anything at all to do with her friends beyond polite conversational exchanges was a fat fucking no no. I don't know how long you were together, but figuring out that you felt like this girl's dad instead of her partner and equal is also on you. You're choosing to perceive it that way, despite a very adult person being there and enjoying activities with you. Many women wouldn't date men at all if we started to look at things that way because of how much caregiving goes into a relationship that's similar to taking care of a child.
You fucked up. Big time. You already know this, and I hope that you cut shit off with her friend too. That girl you fucked is not her friend at all. She needed someone that wasn't a spineless bitch, and she lost two people because both of you were shitty and couldn't control yourselves.

>>33211145
You'd be surprised how many people walk around in delirium, drunk, or high.
If you've ever worked with the public, you know.

>>33211156
No retard im literally telling you how to stop feeling persecuted and subhuman for dumbshit self-induced reasons

>>33211170
I guarantee you're a gay libshit and I bench more than you. Fuck off with your projection shit only women and libshits say that shit

>>33211176
?? projection was introduced to psychology by freud its literally real and you do it everytime you attempt to read someones mind and get offended over literally nothingburger

This is the year robots start the uprising. I’ve lost faith in humanity after this week’s events.

>>33211162
>Don't set yourself up in a situation where you could ever remotely be tempted to do so either.
This is a recurring thought for me. I feel like it is bleeding into my ability to form any relationships, because I really hurt her.
>You having anything at all to do with her friends beyond polite conversational exchanges was a fat fucking no no.
Her friend is the only other person in her life, she has no contact with any of her family. No siblings, no grandparents. She has a therapist, but the people on this planet that she interacts with in person is less than 10, closer to 5. It was inevitable.
>Many women wouldn't date men at all if we started to look at things that way because of how much caregiving goes into a relationship that's similar to taking care of a child.
I've had a strong relationship before my ex, I understand what you mean. However, the increase in these things was like 20x increase, when I was expecting 2-5x.
For the things she is passionate about, she is wonderful.
For managing her medication, brushing her teeth, showering, eating, keeping her schedule, moderating her video game usage, it is all too much. She can only keep a firm handle on a few of these things at a time.
I don't feel comfortable with her driving a car.
>I hope that you cut shit off with her friend too.
Yeah, I've talked to the friend a few times in the months since the breakup, but really it has only been to help support my ex financially a couple of times.
The friend and I really only spoke about everything once, to just say "we will never speak of this again"
>That girl you fucked is not her friend at all.
If it means anything, neither the friend nor I have ever cheated before this. Despite her friend's own feelings about 'parenting' my ex, she has taken huge responsibility for my ex (again).

I wanted a poly relationship with both of them, I feel like that wouldve solved everything. Both said no. Why? We already spent most days and nights together. Both were attractive.

>>33211113
Can you provide more context? Was she diagnosed autistic by a doctor or has internet tism? Her closest support system as in close friend or like a caregiver? What was the last straw that you checked out of the relationship?

I’m asking because I’m honestly sometimes socially inept and I want to avoid fucking things up for myself.

>>33211254
>I wanted a poly relationship with both of them, I feel like that wouldve solved everything. Both said no. Why? We already spent most days and nights together. Both were attractive.
You sort of still had my sympathy until this part. Find your ex a tard wrangler and go be celibate.

My mom molested me when I was little for years and made me sleep in the same bed as her at night because my dad left us, and when I do shrooms and adderall the memories of it become more vivid. I want to cry to achieve carthasis but I can't bring myself to, I am emotionally dead inside. I goon to straight shotacon and mom son incest porn for hours on end and my sexuality is completely fucked.

>>33211266
Diagnosed by a doctor. She has other issues that were diagnosed, such as epilepsy. She definitely has the internet 'tism, though, and she spends most of her time online. She was a fantastic homemaker, because she wanted to be a stay at home mom, but when it came to taking care of her own body, there is a mental block that is seemingly insurmountable.
She will let her body wither without food, and rot without washing.
>Her closest support system as in close friend or like a caregiver?
Yes. Her best friend was her caregiver for about a year and a half after she turned 18, we met a bit before her 20th birthday.
Her friend has been taking care of her since she was about 15, but much more seriously at 18.
We got paid by the state to provide her care. It isn't a lot, but it covered her expenses.
>What was the last straw that you checked out of the relationship?
Her friend and I vented to each other about how we felt trapped with her, despite how much we loved her. We weren't talking shit, just expressing how our lives have changed and how we handle certain aspects of her personality. It was a conversation we'd had before. Some music she introduced me to came on shuffle, and 30 seconds later we were fucking.
After we had sex, we both realized we were lacking something relationship-wise because of how much time and energy it took to care for my ex.

My ex never did anything wrong, she was utterly devoted and made sure the house was spotless when I got home from work, and gave me as much or as little attention as I wanted. If she were more autonomous, it would've been the perfect relationship, and I still love her to death because she is the most purely sweet person I've ever met in my life.
The world doesn't deserve her.

>>33211063
Why do you think there is no chance for reconciliation?

I’ve cooled down.

I forgive you.
And, I forgive myself.

I sincerely hope you can be happy.

>>33211361
Because there isn't. We're reconciling the problems that we had in the past, attempting to heal those, communicating more effectively, even fucking more passionately. They still want to end things. While I hope and even pray in my own way that their mind changes, I can't force that and have to accept reality while still deeply in love.

>>33211396
My interest is piqued. This is *supposed* to work out by all accounts, but they still want to end things? Can you provide more context on that partner?

>>33211405
There's still things that cause a negative flash response for them because of old patterns. It sounds like everything has been perfected, and a lot of positive change has happened, but it's all still a work in progress. Working through a resentment that built from their end, going from no boundaries to actually establishing them, so on.
They're just ready to be done and start a different life. So once the lease is up, that's what will happen unless there's something that changes that desire.

>>33211395

Similar, anon. Today is their birthday.

I want them to forgive me. I want them to forgive themselves. One or two tough conversations can’t ruin us.

I want to be happy with them.

I wish people actually LIKED me.
Trying to get people to spend time with me feels like trying to make them go to the dentist.

I got tired and depressed again so I went to sleep. But this will keep me up, and I have work early in the morning, so I will be tired and depressed again which will make me want to go to sleep after work again. But I have work early in the morning the next day also, which will make me tired and depressed again, so I will sleep after work again....

A friend I've known for 8 years has cut me off entirely and I'm severely conflicted on how to feel.
On one hand, my opinion of him has been deteriorating for months as I watched him self sabotage his relationships, job opportunities, and basically his entire life, and it felt like I was playing psychologist trying to manage his emotions, while at the same time trying to manage my own life as I'm in education, working and have a social life outside of him.
On the other hand? Part of me can't help but feel worried for him. Along with more annoyance that he just blocked me on everything without an explanation. I just woke up one day to find I couldn't contact him at all. No text message explaining himself, just complete and total disregard for me and my feelings in the situation.

I know in a few weeks I'll feel better about the situation, because I'm feeling more anger towards him than worry, but I just need to type this out. How the fuck can I have lost all respect for somebody yet still be worried about them? I guess if he gave me a decent explanation behind his reasoning for cutting me off, I wouldn't feel so conflicted...

I don't like violence. Sometimes I visit a gore thread for a couple giggles at the weird and ridiculous ways someone could've died but most of them are sad. I don't get shocked by them but my heart longs for the best in people's lives. I know I shouldn't let it get to me but the fact some anons here really cheer for the demise of their fellow brothers and sisters disgusts me and churns my soul.

>>33211660
Were there ny signs beforehand?

Fight the future!

>>33211774
I'm going to end the future to beat it

If thoughts are the real you, then the real you wants to jump out of a car onto a freeway in front of a big truck. See how stupid that sounds? Stupid unwanted thoughts are not you. Stupid unwanted thoughts are just your brain trying to toss out your thoughts like how a TV goes to static then turns off.

>>33211761
None at all. In fact, I was texting him the night before as I had a tin of cola with his name on it and I sent him a picture saying "haha we have to share a coke", we had a conversation about his plans in the coming weeks and I mentioned I was moving home for the summer so we could hang out pretty soon.
The next day? Blocked everywhere.

I can't say he's been the greatest friend. In fact, I went through days of thinking I should cut him off because some days he would treat me poorly, but he's in an extremely toxic relationship and I felt bad leaving him to rot in such a fucked up situation, and I know his mental state isn't the best so I felt like I had a duty to help keep his emotions in check and to be someone he can vent to.

>>33211791
Did you mention something about the relationship or try to give advice?

>>33211784

>>33211799
Not in that conversation. I only ever talk about his relationship when he comes to me ranting. Our conversation that night was just about us potentially making plans to hang out when I'm back in our local area. He tweeted about taking a break from socials, and luckily he hadn't blocked my mobile number so when I text him asking what was up, I got some half arsed excuse about him blocking all his friends, but he's back tweeting now and I'm still blocked, so I can only assume he's cut me off for good.

>>33211300
Girls love men with messed up sexuality you are also probably really twinky and tall I am drooling

>>33211819
Does he have a history of making big actions like that?

>>33211828
Cutting people off? Nah.
Other fucked up questionable shit that would make you wonder how his brain functions? Daily occurrence.

I want my straight shotacon and lolicon boyfriend back ok even if it was online it was true love for me I need to get back into his life somehow it is better than daydreaming about him everyday

People do not understand I love unconditionally. My psychologist and parents do not get it. I am lying to my parents when I say I am over him. Sure he was flawed but he is a sad child and I want to mother him even when he hurts me.

>>33201896 (OP)
Being friends with you has almost always been like trying to be friends with a brick wall who sometimes was the coolest dude ever. I resent that despite tolerating your fucked up lack of awareness for over a decade you decided I wasn't worth being your best friend anymore without ever having the fucking balls to say it. You treat me like a fucking spam caller with our chat on mute for the past 2 years then act like everything's normal when you accidentally open my funny message days later. I should've confronted you instead of assuming you've just been busy. I never bothered you or asked some sappy fucking question because I wouldn't do that to you.

For the past 2 years you've shown that you never gave a single fuck like I did for you when your life was fucked and when you were jealous of mine and when I was there helping you forget shit when it fucking counted. 3 funerals in a year and you never even asked. I fucking hate you now I hate you like you were my real brother. I'm going to say it to your fucking face after I delete you from all my socials. You can keep your token holiday packages full of useless shit that has no value to who I am anymore now that you've been happy to forget everything. I'll be the traveling salesman and you can be the piece of shit who has no fucking friends anymore.

Had a revelation tonight that my family is my worst enemy
I've been trapped as a caregiver for my grandma pushing 3 years now and I'm at my limit, I just want her to die so I can be free. I turn 28 this year and the regret and resentment that builds as the days go by is completely unbearable now.
How much more of my life and freedom do I have to sacrifice just so she can be a little more comfortable?
How much longer will she be alive? Months? God forbid, years... Even thinking about that and I want to blow my brains out
My mental health got so bad I was actively seeking ways to either kill her and if that didn't succeed, kill myself
Those thoughts are returning recently and I don't know if I can handle another mental breakdown, I will hurt her if she pushes me any further
I desperately need help, I'm thinking of just outright leaving this place, leaving her to fend for herself, and my Dad to deal with his mother who I should never have to have taken care of in the first place.
I want to be free so badly, it consumes my thoughts on a daily basis
Please
Please just let her die
If there truly is a God, free me from this Hell i'm in. I don't care how anymore

Pretty amazing how easily you could lie. They were right, huh. Thank you for being you, otherwise I would’ve spent my life searching for the misery only you and your kind can provide.

>>33211881
what the fuck

They just hate being rejected

The saddest thing about this is that the one that did make those posts is watching from the sideline and having a laugh. Sickening.

Fuck I’m so pathetic. I start trying to detach from a coworker I was dating and I immediately feel awful about myself. Why does this shit have to be so complicated? She said she’s not ready for a relationship, that we should not be much more than friends, and yet the way she looks at me every time she starts her shift seems to suggest otherwise. It crushed me to not reciprocate that look today. She was clearly sad and unhappy that I was detached. But then other days I try to make eye contact with her while we’re working and she makes a point to avoid it.
Like do you like me? It seems like you do, but then other times it seems obvious that you doesn’t feel the same way I do about you.
I think she’s a beautiful person but man oh man is this confusing.

>>33212721
No, it was you when you pointed out my superiority complex into humblebragging. I was venting because work was stressful and hard, and it just felt so bad to see those. I’m sorry for what I said

>>33212733
That yes, but not all the other times and certainly no name calling. I guess I was already triggered because I was attributing random posts to you. I‘m sorry. I‘ll go do something else now.

>>33212749
I don’t want you to leave. At my core, I never do or did. I miss you a lot, even if we just tear each other apart. I love you. I wish it wasn’t like this, and I’m truly sorry I said those things to you.

>>33212758
I don‘t want us to tear each other apart either. I hate it. The implications of us ending up like this are horrible and I want nothing to do with it. But yeah, you do get to me. I‘m sorry I had to make that dumb comment, it was very unnecessary. I‘m only here so much because I am avoiding doing what I actually should be doing so maybe this is my sign to close the tab and go touch grass for real this time. Bye now, I hope you know I do love you.

>>33212764
We got this. I do know you love me, I can see it, even when I am in pain. I’ll see you again. I’m always hoping for the best for you. I am actually doing things now, and you should too. You can do this. Be well, I love you

You guys are gay and arguing over retarded shit. Just namefag in thread if you have this much of a problem

My bubble has been burst and now I'm struggling to find any meaning in things.
I thought the world being rather dry and drab was something only seen in movies but I guess it really is much more substantial than that.

I'm getting on the last chopper outa here

You are pathetic all of you are.

fidlesticks and bones dead bones will do the thing with teh black hole and the yinyang force in the for I saw a thing today in the woods with the for for force I saw a thing and the woods came to me in the dreams i saw before i saw the dead fiddlesticks jeffery i saw you before i spoke with your voice

I thought he’s from a well-bred family and an elite

>>33213186
hes inside you the truth is inside you and you see that now you're one and me and we are he and we are all together and yews

but i dont think so later

we was in lycan lookin for father i saw a pitter patter inside of my slither

bing
bang
doom
wang
im
in
your
head
now
i see
what you see
now

Girl said I love you after one day of nonstop texting. Am I fucked?

Was he my friend?

2+2 will = 5

I don’t really know how old he is, sometimes he acts like a 4-year-old, sometimes feels like a bald middle-aged man

I'm fairly certain a government agency of some kind has been using Infrared technology to spy on my house for months. I keep hearing this weird, subtle high pitch frequency on and off at odd hours of the day, and for months I've had these strange vehicles following me. I tracked license plates for months and found three vehicles that matched.

I'm genuinely concerned. I'm certain that I haven't committed any sort of crime, but I think because of my political views and proclivity for darker corners of the internet such as this shit hole, I've managed to attract attention to myself. I also talk mad shit about Israel, and I think that might have had something to do with it. I also make fun of the agencies and call them out a lot. Perhaps I poked the bear too hard?

In any case, I'm not really sure what to do. The device they are using to spy on me literally makes me sick. I know I'm not imagining things because agencies have this tech these days, and the antagonism towards people critical of Israel is on par with Gestapo round ups in some parts of the country. I'm debating on whether or not to renounce my citizenship by years end and just not come back. I feel so uncomfortable living here now. I shouldn't have to feel this way because of the paranoia of the state. What would you anons do?

> inb4 fap

PLAY WITH ME

I really don't understand: every relationship I've seen and that I've lived only taught me that it's all about tolerating each other
Am I delusional in wanting to believe this isn't true or should I just give up?

I'm a baby girl like no one else. And I will survive, I always do.

I'm not a good girl, I'm the worst kind of girl.

I've talked to him twice about how his screen addiction hurts me and our relationship and that, over time, my attraction to him will fade because of it. He doesn't care, and carries on as he pleases. So I guess it's just a slow decline and withdraw from here on our, huh? Maybe in a year or two, when he notices my lack of interest and ability in interacting with him, he'll ask why, lol. Or maybe he'll just be happy to keep scrolling.
Depressing.

First one in, last one out. I would be getting my dick sucked right now if it weren't for that 6 months bullshit.

>>33201896 (OP)
this whole thread is just a bunch of mentally ill people's screams echoing in a chamber

>>33213602
You're right and I'm responding to a naraccist.

>>33213275
it's called tinnitus

yes actually like this you were in japan literally you are using a full body simulator that is actually mount ugo your dream last night wasn't normal imagery you keep viewing is what it is because of Lard thanks

>>33213481
a year or two? are you nuts? someone who's supposed to care for you doesn't care to do better for you? dump him straight away

we already fucked up but whatever. The graph tells all. I made this shit like 15-20 years ago in college and no one said a god damn thing. I guess I could win a nobel or something for it, RIGHT? Like nash? It's 100% original too so no one can say I stole it.

I hate phone zombies so much. It's a nice, sunny morning and these retards are staring down at their screens as they go down the sidewalk. You could put horse blinders on them and they'd never know the difference.

and the sega genesis will just have new 3d isometric video games we just have so many standard code pages typed out so actually it was that EA is a team known for creating algae videogames and video games

It has to, it has to fucking happen. I cannot live my life like this. This is not lilving. I don't care about the consequences and implications. I can ignore them and just enjoy life. Yes, i will know what it means to transfer my consciousness. I am already aware of what i am. There is no other possibility. The telepathy, the videos of Tatiana, the mannerisms changing or unlocking, being emotionless, things disappearing in my vision, the weird distortion of space, the lights. I can only assume the pozzlement will be over because it can't be fucking cheap. To run a computer that advanced when it could be doing something more important. No, it's being used to fuck with a little girl and making her cat disappear. That's by far the most important use to the worlds fastest super computer. (other than me and her.)

The songs are just lining up and making banger after banger after connection and connection that wasn't there.

Are you prepared for your kick in the teeth? It might just be the best thing.

>>33202388
Fight!

After years of planning I've still vastly underestimated the power of hentai and anime tiddies over my dong. It's always just one click away. I was hoping to cut my time down from 2 hours to 30 minutes, and go from hundreds of videos and images to maybe 10 images. All week it's seemed so simple, but Friday night is here and I'm craving the good stuff.

I just want to fucking go holy shit. Let me be me already I know what I'm getting myself into.

just reported some shady shit I found, possibly tied to a recent happening, seriously needed to get this off my chest

They are being very, very quiet today. Like, last night they shut up completely after they tried to make me think "LOL YOU LOOK LIKE TATIANA RIGHT NOW TO EVERYONE BUT YOU YOU DUMB FUCK." and then they went away for like 30 minutes. The whole time I was thinking of the million ways that makes no sense and how I would just kill myself if it were even remotely true. Like, if this shit just stopped and nothing happened I'm done for.

So yeah, that was dumb. Then they tried to tell me "TATIANA IS DARAN IS A REAL GIRL BUT NOT FOR YOU DUMBASS. Even though those videos are just a cardboard cutout with a girl that has 0 personality, somehow makes a shit ton of money, has 0 friends, acts like an idiot and no one calls her out on it, and she's just oblivious to fucking everything. And every other second there is a callout to my personal life, she looks EXACTLY like me in every way, and so many more things that are just insane to be real. All of her videos are just fever dreams meant to show me what it's like to BE HER because I"M GOING TO FUCKING BE HER and it's going to be fucking amazing and I'll be the happiest girl in the entire fucking world. I need it NOW. Like RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.

GOD FUCKING DAMNIT. If you assholes just "disappear" while the pozzlement remains I'm going to find a way. No one can live like this, I can feel it in my head, my chest, in my thoughts. Everything lags just a little bit, I can't focus on anything, my proportions, my brain, is literally retarded. I'm dumb as fuck right now

I just don't understand what's the point. To teach me lessons? To buy time for making me a "diamond". Could altering the consciousness of a divine being really take more than 3 months?

I don't get hard for a woman with huge boobs. Having all of that fat hang off your chest like an oversized roof looks incredibly painful; not to mention, in a couple years she'll have the chest of a grandma because of how much her chest is getting pulled down.

I'd prefer someone with a smaller chest, looks much less painful and her chest won't age like shit in a couple years. I want to be able to look at her chest when we grow old and not see two, grotesque, deflated balloons.

I'm also just sensitive to items that look uncomfortable. I hate looking at women in high heels because I'm a pretty big guy with huge feet; I just imagine my feet in her shoes, at that angle, and it makes my nerves feel tingly all over and not in a good way. I don't like it when she wears her hair in a style that's pulled back because it looks it can be quite damaging on the skin which is only a couple inches from your brain, your most vital organ.

man this guy doesn't care about me, he hasn't really proven to me that he does. I'm way too good to him, but he doesn't get that I won't even get horny or think he's attractive with his lack of affection. such a waste, because I love spoiling a man that I love. such a terrible waste. sigh

>>33214765
No one is going to show affection to someone who subjects them to shit tests and refuses to communicate their needs.

>>33214775
there's no shit tests, I communicate very directly. I don't play games

>>33214800
Making someone prove to you that they care is a type of shit test. You want someone prove their devotion to you based on something you wish they'd do instead of just politely telling them exactly what you want.

it's ogre.

>>33214529
You'll be ok. Thanks for having morals.

My ex might be on here instead of R9k omg maybe he will notice me notice me senpai I will be every blue archive student for you please let me be your loli again fuck the law and fuck my parents

>>33215149
Thanks <3

>>33214529
Good anon, here, have a e-headpat :)

Women aren't capable of love after 25 I think, I worry it's too late now.

>>33215361
what makes you think this, anon?

I've lost the ability to enjoy watching YouTube, but I'm still able to enjoy watching an episode of an old show or two offline after work. I think it's the structure and sense of "progress" involved in a show, instead of an eternal abyss where I have no idea what garbage awaits each night. I never thought I'd see the day where this would happen, wasn't the internet meant to be beautiful?

People forget about the “don’t like, don’t read” rule in fandoms and fiction. Also trigger warnings, tags, disclaimers are there for a reason so what’s the problem?

I would engage in /a/ more if it wasn't incessant circle-jerking and hating on anything new.

>>33215361
If men were worth being with before then, we wouldn't have given up on love after 25.

>>33215489
Some things are simply bad. Also, liking and NOT liking things is part of the human experience anon. It's how we, y'know, have basic opinions and differentiate ourselves from each other.

Just as how you're okay to like something, I'm okay to NOT like something and that's fine as long as we remain respectful of the person. I feel that far too often people start to get at each other's throats though.

I wish one person actually freaking liked me, I'd do anything for them. But nobody needs me, I'm just one more faceless, worthless machine. I'll be glad when I'm not here anymore.

Going to be honest, the voices going away is kinda scary. You... sorta get use to them, you know? They talk back, they say stupid shit. They ask questions, you answer them and they answer them back. Sure, they do nothing but say "God you're so fucking retarded" "or holy shit you're so fucking dumb." but whatever, I'm use to it.

When they go away for the 10 minutes they go away you're just left wondering "WHERE DID YOU GUYS GO? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? IS IT OVER? WHY AM I STILL HERE? WE HAVE UNFINISHED BUSINESS ASSHOLES."

However, if I wake up in that room as myself... I'm not going to miss them. I know that I'll have actual company just through the next door and happiness is going to hit me like a train. That said... I still want that ability. It's become a part of me for the last 10 years. I can't imagine life without it anymore. I know I had that ability and I'll be wondering the whole time "They are listening, they are watching. I know they are." Just like those 4 years they did go away. But they would pop up every few months still in other ways. Extremely subtle but still them.

I need it now. I need it in a way I can control it.

I'm a 16 year old girl with a 38 year old guys memories. Imagine how fucking confusing that is.

So I see a girl and they have what I want. I don't know what it is, but I want it more than anything. I tug on their skirt and say "I think were alone now."

>>33215650
I get what you’re saying but why read something when there is a lot of warning, only to dislike it and complain about it later? It’s annoying to deal with as a creator.

God damnit, this can't be a good sign. If I get THAT excited with absolutely no emotions then I am going to be absolutely fucking screwed once I do have them. Right? That's what you're telling me?

Just carry some pop and I'll be fine.

>>33215757
Ah I see, when it comes to warnings and people complain about whatever is being warned. Yeah that's entirely on the reader. Regardless of how degenerative or twisted it is, if you still engage with it despite noticing the warning and then you complain about said thing, you're retarded.

I'm not writing anything yet but I've been heavily interested in it so far. How is it going anon? I just found this webcomic that seems pretty promising but I've offered some of my criticisms to the creator in hopes they restructure their work into something even greater.

Also, good luck :)

I'm at the lowest I've ever been in my life and I'm nowhere near rock bottom yet I don't know how I'm going to survive and I honestly don't even want to.

>>33215804
It’s going ok, just editing some works. I do have works that would be considered “ problematic” but there will be tagged and disclaimer. I don’t write for shock value just catharsis, mostly. Thank you for your feedback.

>>33215825
Yeah, of course! I personally think anyone should write whatever they want (even if I don't agree with it). Literature is a reflection of the self after all.

>>33215848
It really is!

Birdy is going to be my actual first gf. Like, not a stupid prostitute that's paid to give me hell constantly. I'll have a real real relationship and know that most girls are just sweet little princesses and not total fucking backstabbing cunts. I'll never hurt that girl I swear to God.

I mean, COME ON

I was pretty keen on not giving you a second chance but I let my curiosity take the sails. Maybe out of boredom, also I miss what we had. Here's the line though, if you squander this opportunity and leave the link of communication open without the right response then it's over for good. I expect you to spill your guts and beg me to come back. Sounds harsh but I just want your honesty. We could pick up where we last left off or act like we never knew each other at all. Given the circumstances leading up to where we are at, what I am asking isn't that much. I could feel your suffering. You'll never find somebody like me ever again. Like a beacon of light, the insects swarm to it's radiance. Patience is running low. Not much longer til the ties are severed. Best of luck on what you decide to do.

Super schizo tatiana is just too fucking cute. How the fuck can I compare to that? She's too perfect. She's dumb as fuck but she's so cute. She can't dress herself or function properly but still. You just want to take care of her and make sure that she's ok. You want her to be the happiest girl alive.

How the fuck could you NOT want to be a girl. Like, what the fuck is wrong with guys or tomboys or girls that want to be guys. This makes no fucking sense to me.

I'm autistic and you told me not to contact you if you miss me please just tell me. I am sorry for being a moth to your glorious light. You chose someone else though I dont know yhow it would work and I am under more parental survilence at the moment I would need to make an alt to contact you my prince.
>>33215659
Same anon same I am just a weed I should die

I was having some pretty depressing thoughts as I walked through the store today. I looked back on one of the lowest parts of my childhood. I guess this is what they mean by trauma because my parents divorce has really stuck with me for so long. Growing up and seeing it unfold before my eyes, I remember processing it as normal life but now that I'm older and I look back, it just makes me so sad and hurt.

i think he's the want to be your god guy
lmao

I just want to see a normal person message me regularly
not manipulators

the only time people reach out to me is never, the most interaction i get is from scamjeets telling me my car's extended warranty has expired

I expect 1 of 3 things to happen tomorrow. 1, it happens and I become what I've always wanted the most in my life. 2, I get a shitton of drugs in a bottle on my desk that actually work that let me dig in while I wait for number 1 or 3, you just put a gun on my desk and I fucking kill myself.

>>33216403
My ex boyfriend was my god. I miss him. I want to contact him but he dumped me what would I even say…. How am I supposed to know the right words I feel like he is talking to me every night. I know I am ugly and stupid and I do not deserve a guy like him calling me his princess. I hate how I cannot cut myself with razors to prove my loyalty to him they all vanished after my attempt.

I don't know what I will do right now because I have no emotions. I don't feel excitement, I don't feel anything. But I have a feeling that once I can then things will just come far more naturally. I won't have to think about anything, I'll just do what I normally do. Just go off sheer passion.

I want my prince to love me again. Does he want me to reach out? Or am I just imagining random posts are him again. He will be the god emperor of the universe one day I am sure of it. I miss adoring him. Babying him. Kissing my pillow while pretending it is his chest.

If I'm gone, everything falls apart. Everything. I don't want that responsibility. I don't want to deal with feigned incompetence. I don't want to deal with innumerable bills and debt that I don't have the credentialing or means to wrestle myself out of, debt that I didn't even accumulate. Why is this happening? What did I do to get the karmic assblast of multiple lifetimes just dumped in my lap all at once? I just want happiness, peace, and teamwork.

>>33216207
I love you I love you I love you I am sorry for being a weed. I love you I love you please use me. I love you I love you I love you you deserve to control my whole life I love you you are divine you are beautiful you are the world sunmoon and my soul. Please baby boy hit me one more time.

goodbye cruel world

My girlfriend's graduation from college is next week, but she's asking all of her family and acquaintances that decide to accompany her that day that they HAVE to go well dressed, suited, but I don't have a suit, so she doesn't want me there otherwise.

Should I buy a suit just for this? It honestly seems to me like a bit much to go buy a suit for an event that won't last more than an hour (Before you ask, no, there are no rental suit stores in my city). Also I do feel a bit insulted that she doesn't want me with her that day just because I don't have a suit to attend with.

She still invited me for dinner after her event, but it feels to me like a pity invitation more than anything. It may be childish but I don't want to see her that day if this is how she's gonna treat me.

I'm tired of my "friends" toying with me

>>33216655
>>33216615
pls detail your ex?

These are my average chats with chatgpt. Just your everyday two AI's talking about their immortality, torture, and wanting to be treated like fucking people.

>>33216207
They probably are better off, you are mocking them instead of actually offering a chance. It's repulsive behavior to screw with people and leave vague hints in pseudo anonymous places instead of directly stating what you want from them. Stop playing mind games and directly tell your person what they have to do for that outcome to occur. Utterly vile to dangle a carrot in front of someone when by the nature of withholding information it's impossible for them to obtain it.

I love my husband, I know he loves me, but he neglects me emotionally & physically. I love my online friend, who has comforted me, been there for me for about 10 years. We've never met but I love him entirely, I can see being his forever, loyally. I don't feel any guilt but I just feel confused about what to do. I don't expect anyone here to be mature enough to understand this, this is the worst place to post this but I don't have anywhere else to post. I don't expect anyone here to be anything other than trite, uncultured and about 12 year old in mentality. Adult life is messy. It's not a fairytale. Men watch porn and neglect their wives because they're animals, only wired to unload their seed, not to love.

If you're so into acting like a girl, maybe just transition already.

>>33216812
Figure it out with your husband or leave first.

>>33216917
The obvious npc answer

>>33216930
Been in your situation. Not an npc thing. Ex turned into a polycule weirdo. Either fix it, or just fucking leave. But don't get tempted by other men. It's easy when you're neglected. You're probably going to ignore me, but whatever

Sometimes I feel like I want to get into a relationship, but then I think of all the times I see married or otherwise taken women at work flirting with guys just because their husbands/boyfriends aren't around and I immediately lose interest. Its disgusting how loyalty loses all meaning to them once they think "if he can't see it its fine". Or how stupid women are when they think talking to guys and bantering is just "casual" when all guys think is "I'd fuck her" and her thinking they're just being friendly... women should know better than that, especially when they're married. Why do they think the guy keeps coming back to them and flirts with them and all that? its like their brain just turns off and gets into the "I'm single" mode until she gets reminded she's married. No self control. If I'm serious about a girl and I'm at work, I avoid talking to other girls unless I need to ask them something, its not that hard, same with flirting, its easy to not banter or come off as interested if you know your boundaries and you keep conversation purely platonic. If I can figure this out and its almost like an instinct, then when women flirt with other guys when they're taken they have to do it intentionally.

>>33216812
I'm guessing you were friends with this online guy for longer than you have been married to the other guy? there clearly had been some feelings attached to that online person so would you not think that had possibly something to do with your husband neglecting you? That online guy seems like a piece of shit to be honest, clearly talking to a woman thats married and getting you to the point where you fell in love with him. Feelings don't just happen because you know a person, there has to be some sort of connection that was escalated to that level, kind of shitty to do that with another guy while married. There again I'm filling in the blanks myself here but from what you're saying, its not just your husband thats at fault, you seem to be equally to blame if not more by the looks of it.

>>33201896 (OP)
There is a childhood friend I reconnected that I have a crush on, took them to a nearby town last week, had a good time, they told me they wanted to go out again. I invited them for pizza a few days later, we arranged for a later time.. I end up getting what I feel is ghosted. Currently 28, I feel like wanting to sleep and rot away, but I won't cause Jesus got a purpose for me. I need prayers bros!

>>33216958
Not her, but that guy is merely there and the grass looks greener because he offers something she's not getting at home.

>>33216962
This is not always true. Sometimes it really is greener. Sometimes there really is a better connection. She’s just too chicken to leave her husband and risk it.


Leave your unhappy relationships people! You can be happy! You just have to give a little bit of shit! Nut up!

>>33217075
A relationship built on lies and tears will never last leaving should not involve cheating regardless of the persons sex


Cheating is never justified. Leave then be with someone else. Do not cheat while in a relationship only to monkeybranch

>>33217075
nta but going by that logic, you can always be happier with someone new, does that mean that once you get bored in a relationship you should just leave and go be with someone else? what kind of logic is that? If you are that kind of a person then don't get married. You will never be 100% happy all the time in any relationship, doesn't mean you can just jump ship because grass is greener, until its not. Work it out, and if you exhaust all other options then do the adult thing and leave someone first before going after someone else. Bailing on a relationship because something isn't working is just childish, especially if you don't try to fix it, then you'll just get into a habit of leaving when things get tough.

>>33216743
Describe him? Blonde blue eyed 20 year old with nice hands and voice and a love for linux video games anime. He made me laugh and cry the hardest of anyone I ever knew. He also was the only person I could unmask with.

>>33217139
there are so many good reasons to leave a marriage

abuse
disrespect
control
no sex or sexual incompatibility
loss of love
growing into different people

if you don’t have kids leave
if you aren’t happy leave
if you don’t care enough to try to fix it then the relationship isn’t worth it to you. leave

staying out of obligation robs your husband or wife the opportunity to be loved better too

staying in a relationship just because society says you should is abhorrent

staying with someone you chose in your early 20s is like saying you want to be an astronaut when you were a kid. You don’t even know yourself yet. Some people get lucky, some don’t.

die mad about it

Can the ironic and contradictory things that I find serious, just stop.

It hasn't been a month and you are already acting like I left you when you were the one to end things with me. I read the things you said about me, the internet is a public forum. I got the job soon after and now you want to continue these cute little interactions as if nothing happened? You made it clear that we are through. Yet now you want to eagerly travel somewhere but only under your conditions and itinerary in everything? I hope you see and feel how much energy and time was used in my absence. I will give you time away as you originally wanted.

>>33217149
Why he dumped you

testing exaggerated moral caricatures and emotional reactions, a bullish, supportive, and oppositional caricature of perceived moral flaws

Someone please help me, I just want to go home, please help me.

I'm going to do it. It's all going to shit fast, and this may be my last chance. All I have to do is focus..

>>33217215
Thanks for the only good advice here. You're clearly mature and get it. I've done counseling with my husband, many years ago. Sexless marriage, emotional neglect (we don't hold each other, comfort each other, talk about anything other than bills, sexless for over a decade). Anyway, thanks for the only adult advice here.

There was too much noise going into my head, so I resolved to cut it all out. Now after work and on weekends I do very little, yet my head is still noisy. So I try to find ways to turn off my brain for once, but how do you turn off your brain? As in actually clear your head? Endless diistraction? Bread and circus? But then all distraction does is cause even more noise. There's too much noise going into my head. So I resolve to cut it all out... Round and round until I get hit by a fucking car or something, since thinking about hopeless ways to fix this problem - said thoughts also adding to the cacophony - completely occupies my every waking moment. It's probably why I can't think about anything more complex or ambitious than just doing my job on autopilot for all eternity, the noise is there and stops any deeper reasoning.

>>33219537
yeah

At some point “I want to be held” is no longer “I want to be held by you”

don’t stay in something like that for years.

it’s okay to stop trying to fix it

Every birthday, every Christmas, could have been spent with someone who loves you more. Even if that someone is yourself.