I need a way to quickly, briefly, explain the moral and philosophical background ,of the behaviour I will start having; I'm EXTREMELY bitter\resentful\upset at the universe or reality, because I found out a neighbor's daughter flew to india because she's a model. so, she flew to india to do some retarded model s* photograph shoots. I can't quite cope or accept that WHY NOT ME, who flew to the magnificent india -country of celibate ascetics- for free, as she did.
So, I decided I will adopt in my real life, daily life the motto of : "i could literally die any day might as well live to the best possible level, be brave, daring and reckless—im on rock bottom, can't possible lose anything
How do I explain all this s* very quick, whence I'm questioned or put unto inspection for beheaviour irresponsibly with money, food, health, etc? among other possible disruptions of orderly life expected of societal humans.

>>33390225 (OP)
>How do I explain all this shit very quick when people wonder why I'm acting neurotic?

Easy: "I am insecure. I am focusing on soothing my insecurity with empty ideals, that is why I am irresponsible with money, food, and my health."

You posted this thread before. You could have gone to be a model or some talent in India but you didn't, because you didn't want to. It's that simple. If you wanted it, you would have. That other girl wanted it more than you and she did it. And now you have envy. You think you are envious of her modelling. You're most likely just envious of her efficacy, that she can start a dream and see it through.

So now you think you should adopt this attitude:
>I could literally die any day dayz may as well be brave, daring, and reckless

You assume that other girl has the same attitude maybe. Maybe she did maybe she didn't. That's not the thing she had. She had a goal, one she believed would materialize if she made efforts. She made efforts, the goal materialised.

Recklessness is what happens when you have no goals. Recklessness also gets you killed. So forget about being reckless. Be disciplined instead, have a goal, actually believe in that goal, and make sure the goal is something you chose, not something you only picked to imitate other people.

she didn't go to india. she GOT FLIED to india, did some photos there, and CAME BACK.
she's travelling the world for free.
I might as well become a disabilitybux scammer, some sort of criminal or deliberately crack my brain and became a happily-schizo criminally incompontent insane person..IDGAF , it's not fair that she gets to travel the planet because some jewish faggot model-company owner likes her face.

>>33390283
>it's not fair that she gets to travel the planet because some jewish faggot model-company owner likes her face.

And you lament that you couldn't do the same. You would sell-out to a Jewish faggot model-company in a heartbeat if the story was inverted and they had chosen you to fly around the world for free. You are simply angry and bitter that your life lacks opportunities. And that's fine to feel. In fact those are helpful emotions. But they are wasted and worthless if you lack resolve to temper them. You are supposed to create opportunities for yourself. Again, you do that by having a goal and then making deliberate steps towards that goal. And you can 't do that if all you do is wallow in self pity.

>>33390225 (OP)
You're entitled. Get over yourself.

>>33390429
I'm not entitled in the pschological sensel I am JUDICALLY entitled meaning I deserve more than most humans because I do semen retention.
I am "cosmically legally" Entitled to benefits, privileges, and perrogatives.

>>33390832
Yes semen retention - the ultimate shortcut for men who want to feel superior without doing anything valuable.

Enjoy your hand! Lmao