Thread 33576064

I am a straight woman but the way male sexuality works grosses me out. It doesn’t seem like a way to express genuine human connection, they treat it like some sort of hunt, conquest, a establishment of power dynamics. That is so disgusting and devoid of depth to me, idk if i should just stay single or try my luck.

Op pic making me hungy. Looks like prosciutto or summin.

>> 33576068
Id devour that

>>33576064 (OP)
Touch grass and stop reading stories on Tumblr or whatever. Most men would kill for emotional connection and haven't thought the words "power dynamics" in their life.

>>33576064 (OP)
All you have to do is compliment a man these days and blamo. You've formed an unbreakable emotional milestone in his life. A core memory he'll hold onto and recall every time he's tempted to end his life from that day forward.

>>33576064 (OP)
Can you go into a little more depth about what you mean by "depth?"

Forgive me, but men are constantly hearing how we fail to establish "emotional connection" with women who refuse to explicitly say what they want while clandestinely seeking men with bigger wallets and bigger dicks, then murdering their babies. Your sexuality isn't any more noble or interesting.

>>33576064 (OP)
Wait until marriage to have sex. Automatically filters out all sex pests

>>33576064 (OP)
there are men that don't approach it like that but you aren't interested in them. men that value intimacy over aggression just get called undateable creeps or fags

>>33576064 (OP)
Ooga booga. Me big gorilla man. Me smash pussy. Kong who smash most pussy is king. Me want to be King Kong. Gimme unga bunga baby.

>>33576092
That genuinely is not true. What you are describing are men who act like they're in love after the first date. That is weird.

>> 33576075
I don’t get my thoughts from fictional stories, and men don’t think about it directly no. I got this conclusion by thinking about how men are generally the most sexually violent gender( testosterone makes men competitive, and society associates sex with power, therefore there’s a lot of sexual misconduct coming from them), the language we built around sex (fuck, hit, smash), the way porno titles usually contain some sort of violence (slapping, hitting, etc) and the titles usually contain some variant of the words “owned, dominated” and the woman is always depicted as enjoying it; how there’s this generally negative perception of a non-virgin woman because she seen as something that has already been consumed;dominated, just stuff like that.

>>33576064 (OP)
I mean, you can get boned by 25 frat boys or you can try to find a genuine connection with a decent man
Go with the path you prefer

>> 33576085
What i mean by depth is it being nourishing and a expression of raw human love for both sides. Maybe there are women who see sex like that, but that is much more of a niche, i suppose there’s a lot more women who don’t act like that. Im sure there are men who aren’t straight up sexually violent too, but the way our culture is subtly built around it, how women need to alter their behaviors (the hours of the day wich they go out, the preparation they need before doing so, how many people she will go with, just to keep safe) due to male sexual violence, it just seems more intense to me.

>> 33576180
That is just not true, just go one or two generations back, a lot of people had grandmas who became wives and mothers too soon with a man much older than them (clear power imbalance) and made a lot of children because if she didn’t she could be in danger (financially and physically mostly). And in our generation you can see things like the domestic violence rates and femicides really high and those are usually done by their husbands and boyfriends.

>>33576163
It's important to note that you didn't reach this conclusion by interacting or communicating with men. This is literally your headcanon.
I get it though. Being a woman sucks because you're under a constant barrage of harassment and sleezebags trying to get your ass. Try talking with the people who try to not talk with you for a chance. The most vocal guys aren't who you want to focus on.

>>33576201
Anonette, I know how our peasant ancestors lived.
It doesn't have a lot of bearing on the lives of you or me.
We don't live their lives, we live new ones in 2025.
I don't think it's going to do you any good to ruminate on how men abused women for 10,000 years. You can't fix that, change it, or compensate for it, and it will just make you pointlessly mad at people who didn't commit those crimes. Me and you, we weren't even born.

Better focus on your life and how you want to live in the new world, instead of how women lived in the past.

>>33576186
>nourishing and a expression of raw human love for both sides
This is a word salad devoid of meaning. It isn't a mature belief.

What is it that you want? What do you think love even is?

>> 33576213
That is true, but isn’t it too risky? I mean how many of the women who dated/married those abusive men also thought he was the one at first? People can change drastically once you’ve become vulnerable

>> 33576253
I know it’s the past, but it still affects society to this day and it still has (a lot of) aspects of the past, there’s a lot of men that still think marital rape isn’t a thing

>>33576295
This isn't Afghanistan. I live in a country where half of the men wanted two women to be President.
If you want, you can focus on the handful of retrogrades who think society can be dragged back to the middle ages. Is that why you're here? To talk to those people? I guess we're not retrograde enough to satisfy your curiosity, kek. I mean, I'm sure you've seen Reddit, which is a website dominated by male feminists who support women without even blinking, even when those women are saying something ridiculous. I guess you're here to find the dark side of men.

So sure, I might as well indulge that. I guess I have a "dark side", like most men. I do see pretty girls on the street and stare at their bodies, enjoy the look of their skirts bouncing, their nipples poking through their shirts when they're not wearing a bra. But I'm not sure that is really "bad boy" stuff. It's just biological programming that gets boring once you're old enough to have been around the block a time or two.

You're pretty interested in femicide, and a lot of women are. That's why true crime shows are the most popular things on Netflix. But the truth is, crime is going down every year. All those famous serial killers that cut up girls, like Ted Bundy... when was that? The 1970s? Those people keep getting further in the past, and life keeps going on. You might as well join the progress and enjoy a modern life and take pleasure in getting what you want, instead of worrying about the suffering other women had to endure in the past. They aren't you. What do you want, anyway? Personally?

>> 33576268
Ok im sorry i was too abstract, what i want is: love to be an active decision or a activity (i actually like to look at it as a form of art) of both partners to help and cherish eachother for years to come and sex to be a reflection of that: two people making eachother feel pleasure because they love eachother. I think the perception of love we have today is pretty wacky, it’s almost seen as an exchange where you have to find the most cost-benefit partner in a “dating-market”, and in this dynamic, men are mostly seen as the consumer and women as the commodity, no matter how much social values change.

>>33576318
>active decision or a activity
Describe this activity to me. What are these people doing?

We're three layers deep now and you still haven't answered the question.
>What
>Do
>You
>Want?

>> 33576333
Describing exactly what love looks like is a complicated thing. I know what it shouldn’t be like, but I’ll try to answer your question: people who make love an active decision make eachother part of their daily lives (be it physically or in a thought when they’re away from eachother), help eachother grow together and individually, and they both focus on being the best partner they can be, it’s still abstract but how can i know exactly what everyone wants?

And what i want is: To overcome my fear of men and experience love with them too, basically . I value human connection a lot but romantic ones have always been a trouble to me, im a adult but i have never touched a guy because i was too scared, all the men in my life have been terrible since my birth and after i got sexually assaulted as a teenager that repulse only got worse. I think thats it, i dont want to fear them anymore, it’s not good to me to have so much fear and hatred inside me even if it protects me in some way

>> 33576317
Yeah you’re right, developed countries must be better, i don’t live in that reality though, in my country about 4 women are killed due to their gender everyday. I actually didn’t post due to the retrograde people, i just like the anonymity of this site, I’ve been lurking and i know there are fairly normal people here too. I like your reply though, it’s very honest

>>33576371
I understand. On the bright side, even non-western countries are getting a little better thanks to globalizing changes. For example, I was just in my family's home country to visit them for a while, and I noticed that attitudes towards women are getting better. They're dramatically better than they were 15 years ago, things have changed a lot.

And I'm sorry about what's happened to you and the life you've lived with men. The suggestion I would have is to see if you can find some men you think are decent people in your friend groups, family, etc, and get closer to them and focus on how they act and how they approach life. See if you can find good examples. The one I always try to remember is the relationship my aunt and uncle have; it's basically perfect. They love each other like in a romance movie. It's always good to have one or two examples of good stories you can think about when you get too hopeless about whether things can be alright. And hey, maybe if you meet the right kind of man, get even closer to him and give it a shot. It helps when you can be friends for a while, first.

>>33576360
It sounds like you need therapy, honestly. You want a connection with men but you have this abstract idea of them that they're half-monsters. If it's because of bad experiences then that's more understandable than if you've just been reading blogs about how much men suck.
If trauma is holding you back from what you want then it's a textbook case for getting therapy.

Wait till you find out most men are secretly attracted to trannies, kids, elderly, animals, etc they would fuck anything if nobody ever found out

>>33576395
No anon, your paraphilias are not normal.

>>33576395
It's even worse than that. Some men are even attracted to you!

>>33576064 (OP)
I am going to kill myself

OP look up Sister Hong. A hella creepy chinese crossdresser managed to get more than 1600 stranger men to have sex with him till chinese authorities locked him up. Most of those men were married. This story will blackpill you about the nature of scrotoids. Then go to /gif/ and /b/ and see for yourself the kind of stuff men are attracted to and how evil and disturbed scrotes really are

>> 33576383
Thank you so much, all of this means a lot to me. I can try to do those things you said, i just need to be able to view men normally, even if i don’t get to date one, i just want to be normal. It would be wonderful if I got to meet a guy i can build something meaningful with though

>> 33576386
Thank you, I’ve tried therapy before but it was too expensive and she didn’t help a lot. But just knowing there’s a fixing to what i have is great

>>33576360
>part of their daily lives
What does their daily life look like? What is the activity? What actions do you think they perform? This is genuinely maddening and it's bizarre how you can't see it.

We're four responses in now and no actual answer. I am 100% certain you have no clue what you are talking about. You complain that men aren't giving you what you want, but you are totally incapable of saying what it is that you want. Is it any surprise then that they aren't giving it to you?

>>33576433
Obviously men try to gaslight us about this >>33576412
>>33576410
They say that is just a minority of men and that you can detect them but it’s not. Most men are wicked and secret sexual deviants. The truth is fucking bleak.

>> 33576433
I’ve seen it all, believe me, but how helpful can it be to look at this type of content 24/7? I’ve been a misandrist before, just being around a man would provoke a huge sense of dread in me, that constant heavy and revolting feeling we get isn’t worthy it in the end and we end up hurting ourselves. If you don’t want to associate with men that’s okay but don’t spend your time actively hating them, it just makes you ill.

>>33576463
Well yes, true. But you can’t close your eyes to reality either, like most women do. Gisele Pelicot wasn’t an idiot, it’s men who are fucking psychopaths

>> 33576477

yes, that’s why we need to be careful, i don’t deny that men can be horrible, I’ve experienced how cruel they can be. But we can’t just think that it’s in their nature to be vile, it makes our problems unsolvable and can fall into the “men are just like this so why should we try to do anything” trap. We must look at what creates these patterns of violence and degeneracy systematically and find ways to stop it or atleast protect ourselves from it instead of hating every man like there’s this element of pure evil in them, it’s just not efficient.

>>33576497
IT IS in their nature. This doesn’t mean we can’t do anything about it. We must ensure only the tiny minority of good men reproduce. Good men != rich or whatever. Good men = nice fathers, loving husbands, animal lovers, compassionate, no paraphilias, not promiscuous despite being attractive enough they could be if they wanted etc

>>33576456
based

>>33576064 (OP)
>idk if i should just stay single
Yes, you should, then everyone will be happy.

>>33576163
>tl;dr i made it the fuck up
Fuck you bitch. Why does every woman fail to make genuine emotional connections. They treat it like some sort of test or challenge to make their partner suffer to validate their own worth. That is so shallow and revolting to me.

I can make up bullshit based on internet vibes too.

Have tried not going for fuckboys?

>>33576163
Stop watching porn

>>33576064 (OP)
I advise you to never breath a word along these lines around any guy you actually like. To put it in perspective for you its the female equivalent of an incel ranting about how he's not getting the sex he's owed because of all those darned feminists and their rights. Its viscerally disgusting.

>>33576064 (OP)
the hunt is the best. I live for this shit.

there's NO feeling like pulling a new woman's panties down while she gives you 'the look'. even the orgasm afterwards doesn't feel as exciting.

>disgusting
I don't know, women are usually OK with this. this is the very same male trait that lets women find a partner just by existing and choosing among the men who approach. seems convenient.
>devoid of depth
the game can have as much depth as you want. a meaningful connection and love can and will happen with this dynamic. even the worst fuckboy can eventually become a father and stick around for longer than usual.

>>33576068
Jamón

Have you considered not being a stupid bitch?

>>33576064 (OP)
Porn has brainwashed a lot of men into thinking sex is some cheap dopamine thrill, or needs domination, and women just warm up instantly like a man does. No foreplay or slow build.

I don't have an answer for you, but older men or more "refined" men might appreciate intimacy that is actually what _you_ like. It feels better to give than receive, some of us eventually learn.

My wife likes "making love", and after enough years I figured it out. It's better for both of us.

>>33577445
This song is for you OP https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbk29JZdl5A

>>33576064 (OP)
>it's a hunt, a conquest
it's not free like it is for you, so yes it must necessarily be approached this way, blame yourself for it because most men would gladly give all of that up if sex was easier to get.
>power dynamics
few men think like that, the power dynamics thing is solely a female hangup

>>33577327
JoJo

>>33576124
:I

>>33576410
It's true though. Don't make me bring up that story about the ugly ass Chinese crossdresser who fucked over a thousand men.

>>33576201

>had grandmas who became wives and mothers too soon with a man much older than them

I don't know how it was in US, but in most of the world men weren't eager to get into loveless marriage either. You can read plenty of stories from East Asian male politicians born in early 20s century, when their parents married them to a girl while they were both 15-17. And every single one of them hated it. Main reason such fenomenons as Japanese "Geisha" or Greek "Getera" existed in old societies is inability to find person you love - parents desided foe you. A man went to Geisha not for sexual reasons but to spent a time with an interesting and educated women, who flirted and read poetry with you. But that prerogative was for nobility, commoners (98%) endured it like everyone else.

And you seem to make males purely driven by pleasures of flesh. Most men want love. Sex is optional and when I want intercourse I can just jerk it off and satisfy myself better. But you can't satisfy the need for love that easily. Yes, men on average more promiscuous than women but not that much. I think the ratio was like 20%/33% last time I checked statistics. Depends on definition, of course.

t. Russian

>>33577445
it's always been like that, dumbass
do you really think men before internet porn didn't think and act the same way? it's just human nature to assume what you don't know but eventually they find out
no need to blame porn or anything else

>>33577497
>Chinese cross dresser who fucked 1000 guys
>in China
So about 0.00013% of the men in China.

Are you intentionally this stupid or is it an accident?

>>33576086
Listen to this guy
>>33576064 (OP)
You're probably only making note of the perverse men you see since they have an emotional impact on you more. There are a few guys around who see sex as sacred and want to wait until marriage, though they are probably rarer than their female counterparts. Regardless men have this same issue where they get grossed out by the most hypersexual women and project that onto all women even though it's just a portion and that's why incels r a thing.

>>33577323
are you a woman lmao
>he will change for me!
can't turn a whore into a housewife goes for men too

>>33576064 (OP)
>they treat it like some sort of hunt, conquest, a establishment of power dynamics.
And women treat it as a competitive social hierarchy game.

>>33577445
i've been nothing but belittled by women for expressing that i'm into romantic sex
>ohhh that's so cute *audible pussy drying noises*

>>33577674
>where they get grossed out by the most hypersexual women and project that onto all women
please tell me where those other women are hiding because i have yet to find one

>>33577711
Yeah sounds like you have bad luck with women sorry to hear anon. I consider myself lucky, but ik a lot of guys can relate. The trouble is that the good ones don't put themselves out there like the horrid ones often do so they're harder to find. You really have to be the active one I'm afraid.

>>33576064 (OP)
There are men who want that, but eventually people learn to mask what they want to avoid being taken advantage of.

>>33576064 (OP)
Yes this is how men think, they want to fuck you. Actually you are on 4chan so more likely they WOULD want to fuck you if you weren't fat, autistic and disgusting.

>>33576085
emotional connection is woman noises for "I want to fuck him".