Thread 33922241

wife of 4 years and 2 kids (4 and 1 year old boys) because i had an argument with hermum involved came and said she wants a break. i took it to mean divorce, so we are getting divorced i guess.

we were living in the same house for the last week, i've just left, she gave me hope she said she needs a break too tired. she also said shes been wanting to leave me for 1 year, then she said 2 years, then she said 4 years shes been planning it.

im in a different country now. every time i close my eyes either her or my older son appears. i cant sleep for more than a minute without jolting awake. i know the only way i can survive is to not think about her, not text her, not beg not plead but its so hard. what do i do. i feel like my teeth are going to fall out

i regret being an asshole during our marriage. i always had my mind on getting that big break then our real lives could begin. i always told the kids i was busy had no time to play with them. i spent the last week with my son doing all the things he asked me to do but i had no time, build a big fire in the garden with leaves and sticks, reading him lots of stories, taking him out every day to ride his bike (he doesnt need stabilisers now).i always thought i would have so much time in the future to do it all but i had so little time. and now its over.

anyone been through divorce at 40+? reddit is depressing. is it over?

im still at the hoping she changes her mind stage, she could well already have another guy lined up i dont know. should i just give up hope. start to hate her and start healing

>>33922241 (OP)
Just how women work. They aren't orietned towards what you gave them, they live in the present and for the future. You gave her stability, what now. You gave her a home, what now. You gave her kids, what now.
The moment you get drained of your posessions you're worthless.

My advice: connect with your kids as much as possible, if your wife has betrayed you and you hate her, know that you don't live for her. You ought to be blameless in the situation, don't try to please her anymore - since it brought you to this. Be a good person, don't suck up to anyone anymore and show your kids that as a man, you can pull yourself even out of these most gut-wretching situations.
What happened happened, cut your losses and start over, focus on what you can be, not what you were/are. Godspeed.

>>33922326
yeah, thought as much. just need to concentrate on work. now i have all the time in the world to. i also miss sex with my wife badly. the week before she broke up with me suddenly her sex drive was really high. i dread to think what that meant