Horse General

Black death upon you if you do not honour horses ITT

>>4989042
So much care and alertness. How can anyone call these poor creatures evil?

You forgot to link the old thread you goof.

>>4962173

>>4989062
Thanks, anon.

How would you feel if horses barked?

Hello horse anons ヽ(0‿0)ノ please vote Birb in the /an/lympics we are in the semifinals so need all the support we can get for both todays poll and the finals tomorrow.
Here is todays thread
>>4988733
there will be a new one for the final so please find it in the catalog tomorrow and vote birb :)

this happened in my state recently

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NqCTIxpBiY

>>4989193
Neigh

>>4989079

>>4989228
this could end so badly

snow hoers

>>4989252
I still can't belive that horse snouts are made from jelly

>>4989204
Hmm nyo

>>4989244
Humpty dumpty tactic

>>4989227
Nark.

horsey museum

horse bodypillow

>Of special note is the high dash, which modestly prevented the driver from viewing the rear of the horses
Horse general neightmare

>>4989438
What an insane feature. Why would they build that? Where is the horse museum I'd go there.

>>4989486
no sorry I'm not a grass

>>4989507
It's too late

>>4989519
ack

>>4989507
proof?

>>4989435
Looks like the horse was already deeply concerned about the stoves hundreds of years in the future

>>4989476
Kentucky horse park
only had a few pictures from my friend but looks very horsey
>>4989557

Neigh

Favorite horse breed? I like the Icelandic

>>4990024
didn't know they liked powertape that much

>>4989438
>>4989476
A lot of the time horse tails are braided or pinned up so they don't get caught in the rigging, so you get a nice view of a horse asshole when in the carriage.

>>4989476
to hide the shitting

i dont care for horses.

>>4990205
Prove it.

>>4989045

In Russia you bite horse!

Would a horse make a good Manchurian candidate?

>>4990267
Such gluttony

>>4990478

>>4990464
No because they are too honest.
>>4990481
Fatty

Just found this gem on /biz/ of all places

>>4990631
They do look really good in hats

I think my horse broke.

My friends are commenting on more horse being detected in their day to day and blame me for corrupting their reality. Has anyone noticed any more horse in particular?

>>4990893
I've only noticed an uptick in doubt regarding the actual existence of equines. Basically the world is going mad.

>>4990902
Sometimes it seems like the only solution is to go live amongst them

>>4990903
>that's it, I'm callin the cops

>>4990819
thousands of years of evolution and they're still working out all the glitches

>>4991108
Horses are still in neighta release? Pretty sure this one is...

>>4989434
This image makes me hungry.

>>4991139
Well then eat it. What are you waiting for???

Deep Impact wants to return to the stables
https://youtu.be/PwRDg3plVtI
Deep Impact wants to return to the stables

>>4989038 (OP)
What is this horse thinking when he does that?

>>4991318
>horse
>thinking

>>4991318
The layman might think angry because of the ear posture but a horse knower understands that the horse is investigating and wanting something nice to eat.

What do you think of Donkeys?

>>4991390
cuties

>>4991390
Good guys unless the wilderness forges them. You cannot break their destiny.

>>4991578
he's just like me fr fr

Apparently horses can't get drunk, because they are designed to digest the alcohol enzymes natural fermentation produces. I bet beer is a lot like soda for them. Basing on human BAC charts, you would need to feed a 1000 pound horse 20 beers to hit .08% BAC, and that's not accounting for their faster digestion of alcohol.
Not that I'm planning to get horses drunk. A thought experiment.
>her husband's horse likes Samual Adams Lager, and spit out coors light
BASED
https://practicalhorsemanmag.com/health/feed-beer-horse-16487/

>>4991390
honestly better than horses, severely underrated

>>4991666
You can get them drunk it just is harder. Pound for pound even a little pony could drink the average man under the table and gobble them up. French horses get wine.

>>4991688
>tfw you won't be a wagu french horse
why live...

>>4991704
It's not that great. The wine they give us isn't top shelf.

>>4991311
Ah, I see. Deep Impact wants to return to the stables.

Aren't any of you at all worried that horses will sometime read all the strange things you have said about them?

>>4992059
I browse the horse gen with my horses. We all laugh at the horse puns.

>>4992188
OHH
BIG YAWN!!!!!!!!!!

Cute fluffy horses!

The fallen shall rise again

>>4992059
That's why I take great pains to ensure all of my horses are kept illiterate. Despite this, there's another horse owner who owns a field next to mine and his horses can not only read but write as well. I fear his horses may be secretly teaching mine to read and will have to buy another field to keep them separate.

>>4992316
ARE THEY OKAY?

>>4992441
the photographer of that horse got inhaled after that pic was taken

I have been managing to canter for 2 whole rounds around the arena!
My transition to canter has improved, but transition back to rising trot is horrible....

Also, what are some stereotypes about horse girls?
I seem to be the only dude training riding horses in the place where I train, lots of girls there, I've been getting some looks by them.

Mare butt

>>4992635
> t. Bare mutt

>>4992645
>I have no grass and I must scream

>>4992256
Snow ponies.
>>4992314
tranny deer

>>4992635

>>4992314

>>4992799
BOO!
Wait he didn't react

>>4992667

>>4992799
he seems pissed off

>>4992968
*flashback of man kicking a bear in forest*

>>4992968
I like when they look back at you like
>what are YOU doing here?
and their body is so long it's like they can't even be bothered coming to meet you with their face.

Anyone know what kind of horse this is?

>>4993133
>welost

>>4993132
>what are YOU doing here?
https://youtu.be/RD3icaZLp6Q

>>4993133
applejack if she real

>>4993148
>>4993141
Maybe appaloosa???

The real reason for the war

Is it feasible to buy some land, build a shelter on it and let a couple donkeys live there on their own with you checking on them once a week?

>>4993186
You should really go everyday. Things happen and you need to be there to fix them.

What if your water system clogs and your donkeys are without water for 3-5 days?

It isn't a great idea to just drop a weeks worth of food off for them either.

>>4993189
So realistically having a donkey or horse is only feasible if the land is adjacent or at least very close to your house?

>>4993191
Or if you're willing to drive there at least once a day. Depends how bad you want your donkeys.

You could also have other animals like sheep, goats, or chickens that will let you make some money off the land and lay for everything. Donkeys can be really good guard dogs.

>>4993141
>welost

attention: horse spotted

>>4993439

This thread smells funny

>>4993672
That's a great video.

>>4993672

>>4994077
>Reddit meme

>>4994091
Laugh!

>>4994091
complaining about reddit is extremely reddit

>>4989038 (OP)
Honor?

>>4994194
Most breeds include the ewe

>>4994215
sheep fren

>>4994237
So long as they don't get too friendly

>>4994003
This article has been making its rounds on the political side of the internet.

>>4993186
You could keep them on full/part livery and then you'd only have to go every now and again and wouldn't have to do all of the dirty work involved with keeping livestock.

horse webm roulette

>>4994003
>It's real
https://www.thecut.com/2014/11/what-its-like-to-date-a-horse.html

>>4989476
Hello. I'm a tourist who usually just stopped by for the bun thread. I haven't ridden a horse in over 20 years.
Anyway, this webm reminds me of something I once heard. Apparently, back in the 1800s, horse poop was a gigantic problem in urban areas and both mens' and womens' shoes had really high heels to help with... cretian problems. They even had people go out and scoop it up at night, but even that wasn't really effective. The only thing that solved it was the increased popularity of cars.

horses are so cute

>>4995201
>canada

>>4995219
You wouldn't say that if you could see what they're thinking.

>>4995227
Would you expect anything less from the country that gave us this?

>>4993143
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hDN3RQbaqE

>>4989038 (OP)
Horse of disapproval and resentment.

Horse enjoyers are the most oppressed race on the planet

>>4996209
What are the charges? Smooching a mare? A succulent breton mare?

>>4996209
>>4996303
Above wasn't believable enough. I'm gonna need a citation.

Which one would you choose: Dying by being kicked by a horse, ran over by horse, or the Mr Hands experience?

>>4995215
>only post that has anything to do with physically interacting with horses has no reply
lol
as you can probably glean, most of the posters here do not interact with horses on a regular basis, let alone own them.

>>4996366
there’s nothing in the post that invites a reply

>>4996366
Maybe we just don't want to talk about poop.

>>4996353
All three are shit but the precise kick would end you instantly while all others are incredibly painful and can take a long time

>>4996353
I wouldn't wanna die because a horse is angry with me or look like I don't practise horse safety. I don't really have any qualms about death by gut rearrangement.

>>4996387
death by impalement sounds extremely painful

>>4995215
When I once took a carriage ride as an attraction, there was a cloth going from underneath the driver seat, between horse legs(edges high up, middle hanging lower) and up to about middle to horse belly.
Horse would just lift tail, drop the shit and it would simply drop onto the cloth, just to be scooped by a driver via shovel and deposited into shit compartment attatched to the carriage. Simple and efficient. You would still have to expirience the smell of horseshit from the stained cloth, but streets stay clean.

>>4996366
There were cretian problems with replying. It looks like it was written by a bot.

>>4989204
no

BANI

>>4996376
but it is polite to thank

>>4996414
All anal sex is which is why homosexuals use drugs so much. For women at least it rubs against their vagina area internally.

>>4993439
strong impressionist vibes

>>4996504
Noooo janny save meee!

>>4996577
AIIEEEE IT'S BEEN OVER A DECADE SAVE ME FROM THE CARTOON PONY

last week I sat on a horse for the first time. Holy shit, why don't we tell boys how cool horses are? It took me an acid trip and five years of hemming and hawing to even consider going for it.

>>4996616
What is hemming and hawing?

>>4996596
Lmao, and the harmless pony got deleted faster than any /an/ console war shitposting

>>4996616
based
>>4996745
Crazy how much they care.

>>4996759
Is insane how over a decade later a cartoon horse picture gets taken down faster than CP. I think the holocaust caused less butthurt over that timescale.

>>4996743
https://letmegooglethat.com/?q=hemming+and+hawing

>>4996616
Most of my friends are horsemen. I'm the biggest horse enthusiast though. Depends where you grow up, I suppose.

>>4996798
Gamers are truly oppressed.

horse webm roulette

>>4996762
and cuckolds ruin entire boards for a decade and mods do nothing about it, guess it’s inevitable with a jeet nigger mutt abomination in charge

more horsey webms for ((you))

getting kicked in the gut/lower back from a 800 kg horse isnt pleasant. would not recommend

>>4996962
not a horse webm fuck

Saw this fella near my house.

>>4997016
Make sure to lock your windows

I live in a rural town with a strange amount of miniature ponies.

>>4997029
post pic

>>4996953
Wow that horse is draining him of minerals and he does nothing about it

Why are the horses doing this to the poor snail?

>>4997160
he's on a escort missions

>>4997059
Here's an escapee from the community page yesterday. There are two really fat Shetlands on the whey out of town too. And a field of dozens in the next town over.

>>4997265
Terrifying.

>>4997265
How many people did it disintegrate before the beast was caught?

When worlds collide.

>>4989038 (OP)

HORSIES ARE CREATIONS MOST BEAUTIFUL CREATION.

>>4996798
>Depends where you grow up, I suppose.
I can see that. if I was born 20 miles north or with parents at least one figure richer I'd mostly just blame myself for missing out

>>4997817
Someone waxed horse

>>4990205
irish cobs/gypsy vanners, cuz they are hairy chonks

>>4998048
aaaa misclick, meant for >>4990045

>>4990045
I rode a tiny Icelandic horse over a glacier in Iceland. If it wasn't for the trolls I'd live there.

I love horse videos but sifting through Shitkok and its horde of retarded normalfags is masochism especially when that retarded algorithm won't get you want to see cute horses and not idiots

>>4990460
I recognize that mare!!!

>>4992441
horses literally cannot die unless they lie down, they are fine.

Once I was late for class because a group of 5 horses decided to start horsing around my apartment.

My dad told me ''just imagine they are dogs and shoosh at them lmao'' but I am not sure. I just waited for them to move.

>>4998431
Never shoosh a horse.

how hungry?

>>4998371
That's the cutest shit ever.
>>4998440
That's a dog

>>4995275
I've heard rumors this is so stupid its funny. One day I'll read it.

ALRIGHT FAGGOT LETS GO

Why are they so fragile? I just learned they can just randomly fucking die if they get a tummy ache.

>>4998675
Too pure for this earth. It's just the whey they're made.

>>4998761
hehe peepee

>>4998774
pure off this earth too

>>4998675
From a purely biological perspective horses are wacky af. It's lowkey a miracle they have survived for millions of years.

>>4998431
>I just waited for them to move.
good decision, you could've gotten raped

>>4999389
Fr fr no cap

>>4999389
mares are very fecund

that's so horse horse tiger tiger

>>4999480
don't talk trash about my wife

was digging through the Flash Tub archives when suddenly

>>4999239
I'd play this... oh wait someone probably already modded ponies into CE

I like local market fairs

>>5000168

>>5000168
>>5000169
mare fair

>>5000168
>>5000169
Do you get to smoosh their faces or are there guards?

>>5000180
You get to pet aaaall of them. I think they are all for sale there actually.

>>5000181
Damn, get that dead one with the dorsal stripe and keep the horse in your house.

>>5000132
why do retards and boomers always fat finger “,” and “.” multiple times? Many times I’ve seen a retard type like “andthis is bad becaus….. its bad”

>>5000188
I'll get some some time in the future. I got 3.5 ha of field, that should work for a little herd of horses.

hehe little horse

>>5000209
That's an alert horse. Observing. I have something similar and want a ton of miniature animals and one regular horse. Do not have the time with business though.

>>5000239
He was very nuzzly once something across the fair wasn't vying for his attention.
Getting that spot around their withers and have them nuzzle back with their lips is magical. Some horses there, who were probably bored to tears just standing there and being petted like they were made of glass, just melted completely, once my hand got to the shoulder in just the right way. If your fingers aren't grimed up in a mix of horse oils and dirt afterwards, then you aren't doing scritches right.

>>5000239

SHP asked to repost his work here a month ago. I don't think I saw it here, so I'm going to do it now.

Does anyone have chicks that need to be watched over?

>>5000291
>trying to trick the humans into giving you birds
we know it's you, heartthrob

>>5000294
OH FUCK HE'S ON TO US!

Cute mare

>>5000256
I get accused of ruining horses by massaging them in that manner. That and the inner back legs where they can't reach. Has them reaching out with their head and pulling stupid faces.

>>5000278
He does good horse

>>5000421
That seems a bit intimate, going for back legs. Horse nibble and nuzzle each other along the neck and withers in their herds, so its a language they understand perfectly.

>>5000394
Leena my beloved. Proof that drafties can be cuddly and loving horses.

So is that horse booru just permanently kill? I wanted to go there for non gooning purposes.

>>5000430
They treat it like a massage. They can't reach there so they appreciate it.

>>5000692
They moved it to the horse only web. It can no longer be accessed without hooves.

Another new day to horse around, do not waste it.

>>4993178
I don't get it

>>4993178
The Russia/Ukraine war. Zoom in on magnet.

>>5000394
UNF nice view!

>>5000774
I asked a horse for access and they said neigh

dis be april

>>5001358
I thought some maniac stuffed the poor horse nostril with grass.

>>5000692

I was watching that cancelled Survivor show they filmed in 2008 where they dropped eight men, eight women and eight horses on that island on the Hebrides of Scotland and they all had zero animal husbandry experience and completely failed to meet the needs of the horses and the whole thing got cancelled but they never told them and it went on for months.

>>4989038 (OP)
Is the offering acceptable?

>>5001533
Neigh.

>>5000458
>Proof that drafties can be cuddly and loving horses.
Draft horses are simply the best.
They could instantly pulverize you with their strong legs but actively choose not to. They're even patient with drunktards who think they can lift horses

>>5001509
link

>>5000394
Why are mares like this?

>>5001715
>anon
>rape

I am warmly awaiting Goldshi's turn to shine in S4. He seems like the type of horse to enjoy anime.

>>5001952
you're not in the uma musume thread anon

>>5001958
Horse thread, horse posts. No difference to me.

>>5001958
>no hooves

>>4990481
this is how i eat pussy

>>5001958
No hooves and snout
Disgusting

What are some catchphrases horses would have? Other than the classics.

>>5002192
touch my snoofa get the hoofa

This thread is now about Christian horses

>>5002192
That photo is pure art. It makes me think so much.
It's absurd that it isn't exhibited in some important world renown art exhibition.

>>5002201
it is an underground classic

>>4995257
It would be cool to have a breed smaller than ponies, but also properly horse proportioned. Basically Hyena sized.

>>5002370
Falabellas.

>>5002370
They live an extremely long time though so you have until your 20's to get one.

>>5002375
Imagine having a couple of these and then have all your buildings, pens, and overall infrastructure sized accordingly so it looks like a normal horse farm where you are the one who's some ayylmao size freak giant

>>5002378
I like miniature animals. I'm working on a pair of tiny ewes but it'll be next year.

>>5002381
I like them only if they have normal proportions and don't have health issues because of those design choices but sadly most of the time there's a health penalty so in the end I'm not a big fan of the whole thing

>>5002383
The ones forged by nature are good. Quessant sheep were made tiny by the harsh conditions of the island so they're perfect.

Jews are evil
(They blew up a horse stable, warning gore)
>>>/pol/507623772

>>5002390
and that’s why all jews burn in hell

>>5002390
I already knew that without needing to see gore of my comfort animal.

>>5002390
I didn't think I could hate kikes even more. RIP horsies

>>5002390
Ok I'm angry

>>5002390
I will literally never forgive the jews for this

>>4989038 (OP)

>>5002680
Weird horse

>>5002680

>>5002680
wannabe broodmare

>>5002680
Fuck off with this forced meme

>>5002390
>over 50 horses dead for no good reason

>>5002372
>>5002375
Perhaps asking was a mistake, because without them being a gentle giant, they lose a lot of their charm.

>have nightmare
>horse appears at the end
Lol

Why don't we see horses using pillows more often?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVzzOU6GX5A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnZ84V5km9M

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPT-nUWe7Cs

>>5002871
night mare

>>5002871
>tfw been having the unicorn dream again
I thought I pissed the bed from the amount of sweat it makes.

>>5002892
In the west we keep these things private

>>5000458
She and Annie are lovely mares

>>5002892
>Horse sees a comfy pillow
>Lays down
>Falls apart like soft bread
many such cases

>>5003162
Thays a dog

>>5003026
ari my beloved

Knowing that horses are giant shit machines makes me like them less

>>5003026
What's the scary unicorn dream?

>>5003326

>>4989397
>>4992188
nice tongue

>>5003362
It's the one where I'm in a burning forest and I find an extremely angry unicorn tangled up in fence wire to a tree and she keeps biting me while the fire gets closer and closer and I'm trying to free her it's really stressful. The neigh-bour called the police the last time because he thought I was being murdered.

>>5003513
That's pretty crazy lol. I only get nightmares when I'm too hot.

Would you pay five credits for a place where you get to go talk to horses and mash their noses all day?

>>4992645
Super off topic but I have always been fascinated by the palate structure in mammals. Dogs and cats have those ridges too but humans don't, atleast not to the same degree. It's like the mouth of other mammals was designed to stretch much further on and it always falls short so the palate seems to crumple on itself. I

>>5003776
They can extend it like an accordion when they want to be longer. Humans gave up this ability to brain hardest.

>>5003776
>but humans don't
I do though.
only like 4 though and barely there but absolutely noticeable with the tongue

>>5003771
Yes but rowdy hooligans would ruin it.

Why got "neigh" so established when I have never ever heard a horse actually say "neigh". It sounds NOTHING like that word.

>>5004267
Never heard a dog say bark either

>>5003985
Silly

>>5004275
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83m261lAlrs woof

>>5004267
It's like "bon jour"
It'd be a dangerous thiing to be able to elarn ath hors a tlangueage atuiha it hatuihetjhuaejtuih jaieut hjiu ejriga3849t8 34th93a4i tna4oing argaergi er ga4h aehj gtaelkhane d harry aoethatnoidoesn' mine dhe's geoat a day aheuhituhnoitime jbo ahonke taonk liea nke arganyihat savnrfr9aieatdk atie asultans aaeinaitehnoath stksuktanh sofrise horseu nauhiteauti haeuithath l ouiaerb

>>5004281
dying

I wish the milkmare milk deliver my milk in the morning

>>5004267
It sounds like that, but just a bunch of neighs stringed together.
>neighehehehehee
>>5004306
Are you ok?

>>5004306
Looks like the horse spores got another one boys

>>5004395
the onomatopoeia for "neigh" in Japanese is like that "hihiin"

>>5004500
sounds like a combo of neigh and whinney

FRESH
>>5005195
>>5005195
>>5005195

>>5000294
I'm with you guys