Thread 5045279

>make eye contact with my dog
>starts wagging his tail

>>5045279 (OP)
>make eye contact with dog
>it stares into your soul

>>5045468
>pic related

>>5045468
>>5045782
Someone needs to draw eyebrows on these dogs.

>>5045279 (OP)
I miss that feeling. I should end my self I'm so lonely bros

>>5045793
Yeah, I wish I had a time machine to fuck with all the time between
Because time feels like an enemy
I lost so many close to me, yeah two thousand and sixteen i lost it so carelessly
I'll have to rewrite history because fuck my reality
It's got me drinking Hennessy I drown myself in alcohol
That's the only time I sleep i know it doesn't help at all
I need to build a time machine to take me back but I know it can't happen

>>5045866
That’s how you earn a pitbulls respect

>>5045279 (OP)
Normally this be grounds for immoliation. (yet pass granted on grounds unadulterated gall)

>>5045279 (OP)
>blink at my cat
>he blinks back

>make eye contact with my pet jellyfish
>starts wagging its tail
>mfw I realize jellyfish don't have tails
>or eyes

>>5046114
not all do tho, for example: my pet jellyfish

>>5046114
Bone never said, "Jelly fish do not have eyes." What Bone said was, "Jelly fish do not have I's"

>>5045279 (OP)
>make eye contact with a cat
>pspspsps
>tail shoots up and it trots over to you
I love animals so much bros

>>5046125
blessed post, Des Moines (IA)

>>5046115
you dont have a pet jellyfish

Doesn't eye contact assert dominance? With cats I know you have to slow blink and look away to assure them you are not threatening them.

>>5046176
Usually, but it also implies interest depending on your body language

>make eye contact with human
>it bears it’s teeth and pulls the corners of it’s lips upwards
Dog bros are they going to kill me?

>>5046205
No, but you should immediately assert yourself depending on the breed if it starts to bear it's teeth. It's horrible to say, but it's one of the few times where the reality is you will need to physicaly intervene. If it's a breed like a German Shepherd and it does that to you will need to pin it against something like a wall to make it very clear that you are not a pack mate it can intimidate because if it does think that you will be in a world of hurt in the long run. If the dog is snarling during play or not bearing teeth it's not issue, but when it does it out of play and you see the teeth that is when you should be concerned.

>>5046214
>but anon, they said huma-
Who said I was talking about dogs?

>see random dog and owner walking by
>lock eyes with dog
>most intense stare I can manage
>dog flip out
>it’s best friend and master starts yelling at it and yanking its leash
>dog is absolutely devastated by this betrayal
Take that you shitty fuckin dog

>>5046214
>how to get bit 101

>>5046298
>grab scruff
>slam into hard surface
Done.

>>5046205
haha i get it

>>5046305
>how to guarantee the next person to touch the dog gets bit too
the funniest part is you think your behavior makes you manly, but it's actually womanly

>>5046531
>you think your behavior makes you manly
No? I would prefer not to

>>5046545
>Dog hater is also trans
pottery

>>5046546
It's not a case of what is "manly", it is case of putting a stop to dangerous behavior immediately and swiftly. It's value free.

>>5046549
> it is case of putting a stop to dangerous behavior immediately and swiftly
But it's likely to escalate and increase the frequency of dangerous behavior
>its value free
>>5046214
>If it's a breed like a German Shepherd arbitrary threat index. is a snarling dog a snarling dog or not? sounds more like you have a complex.
>make it very clear that you are not a pack mate it can intimidate
ooooh theres your ego

you (think you have) have status
doggy dont question it
or ur gonna lash out

Which is the feminine behavior vs. the masculine behavior which is fair and stern guidance. When a beta bitch snarls at the alpha wolf, he doesn't chokehold and body slam the beta bitch because he got challenged. A wolf does not concern himself with the opinions of pussies.

>>5046558
>muh millenial psychoanalysis and feminine v masculine behavior and alpha le beta
I get it you're a homosexual.

If a dog bears its teeth it wont do so again when you physical shock it, dogs are not stupid. If it acts aggressive and it gets slammed for it they will think twice about doing it again. I was taught this from someone who had to do the exact same thing on their GSD as it had a neurotic episode which is why I brought up GSDs as an example, the GSD never beared its teeth since once it got pinned to a wall and did not have the hallmarks of anxious behavior afterwards. You do that or you put the dog down because a dog that bears teeth at you is a danger to yourself and others. Correct it or kill it, but don't let the ticking time bomb continue to tick before it explodes. It's that simple.

>>5046574
yeah every actual behaviorist says that dogs who get treated like this bite without warning because they dont see you as their master and alpha dog in the thug nigga way where the alpha is just the most violent retard

>>5046574
Alpha theory has been disproven. Aversives make dogs resentful, fearful, and violent. Caesar milan is an unintelligent manlet.

>>5046578
>>5046579
Ok, so if a dog bears its teeth at you what do you do to eliminate that behavior?

>>5045279 (OP)
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/hf3AKko7Zag

>>5046125
don't forget the prrrrp some of them make. S tier cat sound

>>5046293
Based

>>5046125
I can make my kot purr by just talking to her. She's so fucking adorable

>>5046666
6666666666666666666666627
>yes & no-cheek

>>5046676
I swear I'm not satan trust me

>>5046676
>fake n' gay head sway using his other hand to jolt it back and forth while cradling from underneath
I hate this webm

>>5046583
Counterconditioning and negative punishment

Get aggro like a bitch, perpetuate aggro bitchiness.
>MAN behavior: If you'll snarl at me, you're not part of the household, you're not being fed, you're physically separated from everyone else, have fun. Problem? You can rejoin the pack when you're ready to stop being a bitch. This will happen every single time you act up.

>low iq, low tbitch behavior: D-DID YOU JUST CHALLENGE MY DOMINANCE? *GRABS YOU BY THE THROAT* APOLOGIZE RIGHT NOW! *GETS BIT* COMPLY HANDS IN THE FUCKING AIR ON YOUR HEAD CROSS YOUR LEGS *SLAMS DOG INTO CONCRETE* DROP YOUR WEAPON *STARTS SHOOTING*
Basically your strategy and attitude is that of a soft bodied murdermutt cop

>>5046735
So what you are saying is I should put it in a crate, got it.

>>5046743
No, never use a crate as a punishment. Crates are often used for health related kenneling, emergency (ie: entire house and yard open for contractors), and transport. Come up with something else.

Some people tie shithead dogs to the porch (and cats get tossed in the bathroom).

>>5046743
>reasonable white men of good character: "in the doghouse" is synonymous with "in trouble and meeting the consequences"
>internet addled soimutt: soooo uhh should i use the pet carrier or just punch my dog

>>5045279 (OP)
One of the many ways a dog will make you smile.

>>5045793
Just get another dog (from a shelter, ofc).