>>64214902
be me
elite pacific boat marines, 155th something-or-other
train for amphibious ops: waves, beaches, cool black berets, vodka with sea salt
get orders
“congrats gents, you’re now a land force”
show up with a mixed bag of BMPs, trucks, and one tank older than my CO
logistics guy: “steel is steel”
slap cope-cage sunroofs on everything because sky raisins scary
briefing.jpg
intel slide is just a Google Maps pin and the word “EZ”
first push
drones start dropping angry soda cans from heaven
driver says he can’t see over the trench
commander: “then go through the trench”
learn BMPs don’t do that
rotate back for “reconstitution”
new gear arrives
surprise, it’s exactly the old gear but with fresh white spray-paint Z’s
one squad gets a T-55 museum piece
“vintage = reliable”
second push
artillery symphony: movement by Shrapnel in D minor
squad leader uses Starlink he found to call home, accidentally uploads whole op plan to a Telegram cooking channel
steppe now 100% anti-marine environment
get renamed “elite assault detachment” because junior officer invents doctrine called Human Wave But With Trucks
truck immediately waves goodbye to its wheels
third push
a DJI with a GoPro becomes our very personal documentary filmmaker
morale event
commissar says we’re getting reinforcements
it’s a pallet of tires and a pamphlet about initiative
we invent Motorized Couch Forces in the dugout
fourth push
commander opens with “this one is different”
it is, in fact, exactly the same
brigade math: started as 155th, now somewhere around 94.3rdth
eventually get sent to “quiet sector”
quiet sector is quiet because everyone learned cause-and-effect
we learn to love shovels
become Engineers by Experience
trenches so deep the pacific marines finally see water again (groundwater counts)
end state
official report: “tactical repositioning after successful shaping”
unofficial report: “we shaped the landscape with our faces”
