Thread 41413914

Hope edition
>QOTT: what's keeping you alive right now? Any bright spots? Anything you're looking forward to?
Last thread: >>41354864

I'm looking forward to a future where it's ok to be a feminine man without taking estrogen.

I'm tired.

>>41413914 (OP)
finally the thread is back
I WANT TO DIE

>>41413914 (OP)
Thanks for makin the thread anon! I was too lazy.

>it’s okay to be a feminine man
I’m not even feminine though I just have long hair

>>41413914 (OP)
qott im taking ssri which feel like is helping but too early to tell for sure. am in therapy. the only thing keeping me going is hope that things will be better. im trying to feel mentally well enough to start going out and making friends and hopefully slowly get better

like this is just not a good situation. transition really isn't very good. trans people don't really pass and i'd never be cis. being a man isn't easy either. i don't like it. i can force being masculine but it feels bad. being a man doesn't feel right. theres no really good choice, but I prefer to fight the demons in my head

nothing. i have absolutely no hope for the future.

>>41413914 (OP)
I have no hope for the future. Everything interesting is getting further away in time, everyone I care about or admire is only getting older, and the planet's getting shittier due to forces out of the average person's control. I only exist for pleasure in the short term.

I'm only alive because I don't believe in an afterlife; if I did, suicide would at least make some logical sense as your pain in this life would give way to catharsis in the next, but as it stands, there's nothing to gain from killing yourself if everything just goes blank.

Hi to these obvious lurkers on /mu/.

>>41414023
>I’m not even feminine
then don't transition
ever
problem solved

>>41413914 (OP)
>QOTT

I don't know, I think I'll get a job, just because life as a NEET has become too boring, otherwise I wouldn't be able to handle it. I'm depressed and the only thing that gave me happiness was agp. Now that I'm a 6'0 old man, all I can do is wait for death.

>>41413914 (OP)
QOTT: Too afraid to die and too unmotivated to live. Distracting myself with escapism and hoping to finally find a cope that makes life worth living.

i am so alone and unhappy

>>41413914 (OP)
QOTT: I personally never planned living past 18 as a kid and since then I've just kind of persisted onwards with all the consequences. I tell myself I stay alive because I don't want to make my family sad despite them not being the best people, though I often feel more numb and detached than in constant mental pain these days. A strategy I've adopted over the years has been to find something dumb to look forward to in the future, like a show or movie, and tell myself to hold out until then so I can experience that at least. Just a constant string of looking for hollow things to hold out for.


Today I lobbed all my hair off, I'd wanted long hair since I was a kid but was never allowed to have it. Once I was an adult and could do what I wanted, I still held out to avoid social pressure and comments from family about it. A couple years ago I finally said screw it and decided to try growing it out in spite of the remarks only to be met with the norwood reaper. After over a year of treatment and still losing hair... yeah long hair just looks shit on me and makes me think more about what I can't have than any enjoyment from having it. Life seems... insistent on making me only want things I can never have.

Anyone think if they had a bigger dick and/or weren't raised by their mom + internet they'd maybe be a cis guy

>>41417356
I used to latch onto the dick thing to cope but I was 7" and girthy kek

>>41417356
mine is pretty large, which I dislike because it's gross and I have no desire to put it to use so the size just makes it harder to ignore.
I was actually raised well too with a great dad too, which just makes me feel guilty for not turning into the son he deserved.

I wonder if I'd be trans if my single mother didn't beat me for being male, unlike my three sisters

>>41417703
Is it weird that I don't mind mine? It's kinda average slightly below average. Maybe I'm not really trans

I think I'm just an autistic man but why do I still want to try transitioning, I can't relate to men nor women so why even transition if I know it's just the autism that's making it difficult to relate to people, what if I'm painting all my mental health issues with the gender dysphoria brush.

Idk. I think I should just let the time pass until I miss my chance at passing and just continue being a miserable, numb man who copes with porn.

it' so humiliating being a submissive male. i feel like other males can immediately sense that you're not a man like they are

>>41419683
but you love it

>>41419683
We can and it's revolting

>finding out that you're a tranny
>at 24
This is karma for posting 41% memes in my chud teenage years. Repping is my only choice now. This is my punishment.

>>41413923
whats so bad about taking estrogen?

>>41420424
you aren't trans, it's just a fetish

"Troon out, and you will regret it; don’t troon out, you will also regret it; troon out or don’t troon out, you will regret it either way. Laugh at the world’s gigahons, you will regret it; feel bad for them, you will regret that too; laugh at the world’s gigahons or feel bad for them, you will regret both. Believe a pinkpiller, you will regret it; believe her not, you will also regret it… Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will regret that too; hang yourself or don’t hang yourself, you’ll regret it either way; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both. This, gentlemen, is the essence of all trannylosophy."
-Søren Reppergaard

>>41413950
There is no girl
Never was

>>41420905
it enables the matriarchy by denying men sexual agency and autonomy

>>41421342
And other copes we tell ourselves.

>>41421429
Nope
It’s no longer a cope
I used to think it existed
I was wrong

>>41413914 (OP)
take your HRT, retards

>>41421566
It gives me reverse dysphoria

its ok to cum
its ok to get hard
its ok to feel horny
you don't need to chemically suppress who you are

Unless you're gincel, in which case you need to be severely medicated and fuck off.

>>41413914 (OP)
stop fapping start living, retards

>>41421566
I think I will order some soon but I'll just be a hrt repper again which is ultimately pointless

>>41414837
>Hi to these obvious lurkers on /mu/.
Hello.

Should I try and date a cis woman to see if that will fix me and if I am ok in normal relationship?

>>41422728
No.

>>41422745
Gonna do it

>>41421342
anima-chan is very real

>>41421401
>agency and autonomy
such as the bodily autonomy to take estrogen?

thing is im not even a tranny. i just have mental issue that makes me wish i was a woman. but i am not comfortable transitioning. I tried it, and was not comfortable transitioning and not comfortable thinking of myself as a woman and would not have passed, and at the end I wanted to be a man again. And also I am only interested in a cishet relationship and almost only interested in women and Im pretty cute as a guy even though im short. i just have mental issue

>>41422728
Sounds like self imposed torture.

>>41423355
That's repping for you. Finding the most tolerable tortures.

>>41421566
Fell for the manmoder meme and tried that. All it did was give me conetits on my obviously male frame, not even better skin because I'm covered in acne scars.

>>41423423
>conetits
Unrelated but how tf has nobody figured out how to grow decent tits yet? 90% of trannies have conetits or A cups at most. Is this actually just a "did HRT too late" thing or are just most hormonal replacement methods just horribly ineffective? Considering breast size drastically changes on cis women all the time depending on their hormonal levels, I feel like this should be easy to fix, unlike bones or height.

>>41423573
If you believe Will Powers it's because trannies overdose themselves on too much estrogen early on and stunt growth at the beginning stages. But we don't really know, just luck of the draw at the end of the day.

>>41423355
It may be torture but it also may be very nice and make me forget all about trans thoughts

>>41422728
i've repeatedly found being in relationships less tolerable overall than being lonely

>>41424348
I've always wanted to be friends with women the same way women are friends with each other, but I can't because I'm a man. I am friends with lots of women but its not the same. but at least I may be able to have a close romantic relationship and that could makeup for the fact that I couldn't have friendships earlier.

just went outside and actually paid some attention to my surroundings for the first time in a long ass time, immediately regretted it.
passing by actual cis women on the street made me realize there's no amount of hormones, surgeries, clothing, makeup or anything else that can make a man become a woman or vice versa, at least during this century. we're stuck with what we're given at birth, and that's the end of that, all else is pure cope. i felt like a wolf walking around sheep, imagining i was one of them. no matter how much i could try to hide my true nature, we're quite literally built different. even if the sheep pretended to care and accept me, they'd be doing it out of fear i cause trouble to them, and they'd be relieved the second i'm gone.
obviously this doesn't mean i'm gonna start chudding out and hate every single tranny in existence, but it kind of opens your eyes to how much of the concept of transness itself is built on a false premise.
transgender = across gender
quite literally impossible. men can't become women. you can be a man who takes the social role of a woman, but you'll still forever be male. maybe there's an exception to be made with intersex trannies, but idk.
you can't claim "trans women are real women", when they're only socially so. they're half-women at best, is what i'm trying to say.
idk maybe i'm just bitter
i wonder how long the movement will last, actually. is the right-wing anti-troon push worldwide just a phase or are we in for the long haul?

>>41425182
what is the social role of a woman?

>>41425224
basically doing most of what society deems "female", essentially playing the "part" of the woman, as other people that participate in the same society as you understand a woman to be, and what one acts like. so dressing in women's clothing, caring about your appearance, making friends with other women, dating men, wanting to be referred to as a woman, etc.
obviously not every woman will adhere to this, but 99% of them do for a good part, it's basically how we groom them into acting from birth. men are expected to not cry and be tough, so we train sensitive boys so they act more "male". girls are expected to be sensitive and demure, so we tell them any anger they have is to be hidden and bottled up, in hopes they fit in with the rest of the other girls.
it's a mask by which others understand our place in the great machine, an id number that becomes part of our identity.

>>41413914 (OP)
Why the fucking hell every rep gen picture
need to be so fucking stupid retarded and unnoticeable?

>>41413914 (OP)
>what's keeping you alive right now?

Agent Smith Moment
Pure luck because I live in a very dangerous place
Feel's like universe don't know what to do with me but don't want me to die

Apparently I'm pretty hot

I WISH I WAS A WOMAN

I STILL WANT TO BE A HOT ANIME GIRL

>>41428211
I MISSED YOU
also same

4 years on and off taking hrt and i look in the miror and i look completely like an ugly man with no femininity at all, i removed most of my facial hair but i dont have the clean blemish free skin of a woman so it makes no difference. you can still see the pigmentation where the hair is supposed to be.

im really just horrified at how i threw my life away chasing something that if i was really honest was never going to be possible for me, i cant even act feminine, in public i default to acting like an awkward, effete man.

i dont know what to do now, not look at myself ever again? try and man up? i dont see how im going to not kill myself now. it feels like this is it and i locked it in for good and now its just a matter of time.

>>41425182
and yeah i live in a place where there are many attractive women, you go outside and you see them and they have perfect facial features and compared to them i look like a diseased zombie. im so jaded, some people can be trans and some people just have to accept they are monsters.

I just wish I looked like a woman. I don't have some deeper inner woman inside me. I have the mind of a man. I don't even get any sexual gratification from the thought of it. I just want to look like a woman and i'd be a lot happier if I did.

Reppergaard classic

Does repgen believe in female social privilege?

>>41429263
Who's asking? -_-

>>41429263
Yeah, but I'm not sure it isn't a grass is greener situation because the misogynistic stuff I hear is far-fetched sometimes even if I agree with it
I know women have priority in hiring, though because every job lists a preference.

I would totally have friends if I was a woman... There are no lonely women...
>didn't speak to anyone the years I was trans, even online, and realistically was an average looking twinkhon like most trannies in selfies
Oh

When I think about again as a man I'm not too scared, I see older men, they have cool raspy voices, interesting face wrinkles etc. thinking of norman reedus, mads, Elliott smith, Patrick gill, few men from my work.

But they all seem to have their shit together, or some identity. I don't. I'm not into anything, I'm not passionate about anything.

And even though I don't think I'd be scared to age as a man I still think about transitioning, thinking it might cure my depression, my numbness, give me some clarity. But I'm probably just dumb.

Plus I feel happy when I look feminine, but when I look like a man, when I notice my wrinkles on my forehead I just feel as numb as usual. Maybe I'm scared of aging.

Idk, I also stupidly told my roommates years ago to use she/her and I always feel like shit when I don't live up to the expectation of what a woman is. When I don't shave, or shower. Or make myself look fem. But would that go away if I just never asked people online or irl to use she/her when I'm basically a "hon", no hrt, nothing. I don't ask people from my work or people in public to use she/her. I dress and present as a dude.

Idk, might try hrt again but higher dose.

Maybe I'm just a dumbass

>>41429263
Not being drafted number 1 privilege

>>41428507
There's makeup tricks to cover up the blue shade where the facial hair was.

And women are not all blemish free, a lot of it is again a lot of skincare + makeup

>>41429191
Mood

i am so proud of you my children

>>41429263
No I think both men and women get different problems and benefits it's difficult or not possible to say which is better its more about how well each individual person fits into their societal expected role. Historically men were privileged.

I think being on hrt for 2 years altered my sexuality. It's been over a year off but I'm not really attracted to anyone very much unless I form a deep emotional bond with them

>>41429263
not really. some things are better for women and some things are better for men

being a man is great
Seeing your beard growing is cool
Having a chest is cool

I don't care if anyone likes me. I'm satisfied with myself and that's all that matters.

>>41431878
I really hope you aren't lying to yourself. You deserve to be happy

>>41432111
I’m not lying, but I’m not overestimating my feelings either. I know it’s just a temporary state. Just be honest with yourself. When I’m dysphoric, I’m being honest with myself, and when I’m not, I guess I should be too.

i love not days like today where i'm totally unable to stop crying. real functional man right here

how many of you are repping because you have a family member whos trans?

what do you guys do all day, anyways?

>>41434754
today was my day off. i layed in bed all day. i wasn't interested in doing anything. so all i did was scroll for 12 hours.

>>41434754
wfh so mostly staring at the ceiling then get high at play counterstrike

>>41413914 (OP)
Keanu would beat all your asses

>>41434754
Rot

>>41434754
disassociate out of my body

I want a hsts virgin repper bf so bad... I would make him feel like a real woman, but prefer him as boyslut.

getting angry drunk >>>
>>41436162
isn't the whole thing abt hsts that we wouldn't have hit this point

>>41436196
I'm sorry repper-kun :/

I still STILL want to be a hot anime girl. Nothing else will do. No other copes can work. There is no substitute. anime girl

>>41436312
why, i'm finally drunk again, this is an improvement

i wish i wasn t ugly, that sucks more than being trasn desu

>>41436417
Don't drink too much girl :/
>>41436450
you are not ugly.. wtf first time being here as gaymasc is really depressing, you guys need a hug

>>41436557
>guys need a hug
Yeah that's the problem.

anyone listening to anything fun? i've got https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TF-a1e1NBbs on rn
>>41436557
i only have an early morning job interview tomorrow it's fine
also if you're here as a gaymasc aren't we the exact type you're trying to avoid. bad mental illness / hot tradeoff

>>41432881
yeah relatable. quite often i can get ready in the morning and even feel some optimism for the day ahead, but as soon as i step out the front door i feel the tears start

i wish i wasn't sexually submissive. i honestly believe my whole gender complex is a result of my fucked up unmasculine sexuality

>>41436708
i know we're doing bits here but being subby is like the only part of this i can enjoy idk why this has been such a thing

I wish I hadn't spent all my money on booze, so I could've had more money saved up right now to buy more booze.

>>41436777
i guess i'm exaggerating some but not by much. it really is something that bothers me a lot

>>41436989
yea idk i guess i've just accepted that my sexuality is fucked anyway so i'm not that bothered by it, but i can see why it might ig

my repressed dysphoria makes me want to be fucked hard by older men

been a v long while
do i cut on my wrist now that i'll have all winter? want to so bad

>>41437201
holy shit i didn't know cuts on your arm bled so much more
probs good but man didn't know i was babymoding w my thights

>>41434754
go to the thrift market and feel manic from all the good offers but not buy anything
>>41436708
i thought so too long long time ago but i realized i wanted the whole package always
>>41436837
i have some money right now but can't decide if i should buy a new phone, hobby stuff or divide it between hobby and pretty clothes and shoes
>>41437190
same but i'm old too now so whats older man for me now

is there anywhere i can post/sell sh pics?

Something that helped me recently was contextualizing my desire to live as the other sex to be just as unfulfillable as joining the NBA, getting elected as head of state or becoming a billionaire. It's just a silly little fantasy that is not worth thinking about much. Truth is that even if you could pass (which like 90% of us can't), "IWNBAW" will still forever be true, and that's fine, the same way it's fine that we're not all billionaires. You don't need a perfect life to be happy.

Caught a glimpse of my massive male skull and neanderthal face in the mirror, holy repfuel.

i want to be hot anime girl and have big anime tits

>>41437493
>same but i'm old too now

How old? Always nice to see a long life repper surviving.

>>41439432
35
just remembered theres a bbc pstar whos like 60+

>>41421429
There is no cute girl inside me. Other people have cute girls inside them. All I've got is some lanky brickhon ogre with weird delusions.

>>41438835
I'm trying to do that but it's hard. I know on some level it's the same as trying to get to the olympics or date a 10/10, and my genetics just won't ever let me. But I really really don't want to be like this. I don't know how to just push everything down. I wish I could just never see or think about my body ever again.

>>41437190
I wish I was an older women seducing younger incels tbhon

>>41438835
i wouldn't even entertain a thought like that your head must be up in the sky

Anyone else wish they lived some time like a hundred years ago? If I was in the Victorian era I could have lived my entire life thinking 'I wish I was a girl' like three times, and dismissing it as a silly fantasy. But now I see trannies and people talking about trannies everywhere and I can't just ignore any of it because it keeps coming up. I wish they'd never given trannies acceptance just so I could forget about it.

>>41439755
yeah even stupid tv and pop songs have the potential to ruin us and before that degenerate theater shows
you can only rep if you live in a place like this >>41438835
uncle ted is always right

>>41439755
15th century and dying in warfare for me

>>41439921
Ehh. I don't want to die of smallpox in some bloody battlefield somewhere. I'd love to see the Industrial Revolution in full swing, though.

Unsure where else to vent, these days. Which is real ironic, it is not lost on me.
I just want to avoid hurting others, you know? I see people I care about posting the most vile political garbage, hell I am unable to escape it from complete strangers. Was it always like this? I feel like I remember it being different.
I talk to family in person and I can just see the pain and confusion I am causing.
I subscribe to the "science is still too far out" angst. But, in answer to the QOTT>>41413914 (OP) I guess it's the fact that I have met some butch cis women, I have met older feminine men, I have seen myself in others both physically and mentally in both straight and queer peoples of every nationality. While I acknowledge my internalized self-directed transphobia, I still hold out hope for the femininity in me, and in others. I got little to nothing else.

>>41440162
>I just want to avoid hurting others, you know?

Okay you fucking triggered me. You must be masculine brainwashed retard. And your dysphoria isn't real
(You) 6 ft or +6ft don't think you ever experience bullying like the majority of this thread

I don't trooning out only because of survival instincts because my fucking parents just need some good straight reason to knock me outside so I'm just die homeless.

AND I REALLY WANT TO HURT ALL OTHERS AROUND ME
I want nobody to escape
Like yeah river's of blood

Because all of this people are fucking ugly stupid and they only think with their wallet stomach or dick

Idk I think I'm completely opposite

>>41440279
I should be more angry, you are right.
But right now I think I am just sad. I see little point, in being angry, little I could change. But I do suppose it would be more than being plain upset.

>only found out i can buy estrogen on any pharmacy without a prescription at 19
this country is ass and this is one of the few good things about it, and i can't even enjoy it because it's already too late. if i knew about it sooner, i could've bought it secretly at 14 or something. i am so fucking stupid i probably deserve this fate

>>41440380
>Others

They literally doesn't care much. Or they already 'hurt' because you can't fit in their boxes. How you should behave look feel etc.

>>41440709
Could be worse

>>41439755
You would've been worked to death in a factory.

>>41439755
Morphine, cocaine, and opium were all otc back then so hell the fuck yeah.

injecting every ten days is too much of a hassle and I hate the scars it gives me

do you guys also obsess over measurements even though you'll never troon or is it just me

Why are we so so similar?

>>41442338
Yeah I obsess over them all the time. The desperate hope that I could maybe possibly pass if you squint never leaves.

I cant even get out of bed

>>41439719
Depends on if your body image issues come from ROGD or smth else. ROGD is pretty curable by pracitcing CBT and avoiding trannies at all cost.

>>41439755
Trannies being ubiquitous shouldn't really change your outlook on that desu. Being a woman is still an impossible fantasy, despite their existence. You might feel they're luckier than you for kinda resembling real women, but they're really not. They're like you but just stuck even harder between the two genders

Taking hrt made me a cis man

>>41423573
mine are pretty well developed
i think most tranners are just too thin when starting and when they finally get some female fat distribution their breasts have done most of their development, while someone with moobs at the start will likely get better results. why? idk local aromatization in the growing breast maybe...

supporting evidence: there are a lot of ultra late fat transitioners with decent boobs.

just realized something about maleness i lowkey despise it's the dudebro culture it's invading everywhere even a virgin incel field like tech is full of techbros bet there are tranny bros these days too

>>41419683
have you tried being a bisexual queer snob like stewie griffin

post measurements and see if it's actually over or not, i'll try to answer it based on whether it feels like they're bad or not (i have no idea what i'm doing). here's mine btw if you wanna be kind and analyze me...
>Height: 6'0"
>Shoulder breadth: 17.5 inches
>Underbust circumference: 31.5 inches
>Waist circumference: 28.5 inches
>Hip circumference: 36 inches
>Hip breadth: 12.7 inches
>waist-to-hip ratio: 0.79
>shoulder-to-hip ratio: 1.37

>>41444200
i don't know any of mine, i know its over because i am not pure of heart

>>41444200
or you could attentionwhore elsewhere

>>41444200
>Height: 5'10"
>Shoulders: 17.5"
>Underbust: 31"
>Waist: 28"
>Hip circumference: 39"
>Hip breadth: 15"
>Not bothering with ratios
I'm a little overweight though, I've just got a real obvious waist.

Anyone else has this weird transvestitic pseudodysphoria where you don't really get much dysphoria in your day to day life but you envy women a lot and wish you could dress like them and look like them but when you try women's clothes you get really depressed because of your wide chest, receded hairline and massive brow bone?

>>41444240
honestly, you're better off not knowing.

>>41444333
ill do it just this once

>>41444336
yeah your waist to hip ratio is insanely good (0.71). your shoulders are kind of fucked when compared to your height, but you mog me in every other part lmao
verdict: could *maybe* pass if you exclusively train your lower body for muscle growth and dressed properly for your body type, assuming your face isn't neanderthal tier. idk tho

>>41444407
yeah but i only get slightly depressed and still enjoy it a little
i think the envy takes on a new level when you see ugly women getting to dress fem and you feel like eh i could look better than that as if looks were the only reason she was getting to dress fem and not vagina privilege

>>41444451
>honestly, you're better off not knowing.
plus even when they're bad, what am i going to do, change my bones?

>>41444451
Yeah my shoulders make me want to cry everyday.

>>41445165
what a dumb roastie

>>41444407
Thankfully never crossdressed, but I do envy women a lot.

>>41436332
hold out for total immersion VR
we're all gonna make it bros

>>41446852
Anon I'd rather heavenpost on /x/ instead.

i just read that "The Masker" short story that was mentioned in a recent thread about repping and it's pretty shocking how well it describes the genx and millenial fetishy side of trans repression.
all the mentions of the main character reading forcefem erotica and hoping she'd find a way to stop being like this, all the boomer sissy shit that i saw growing up that made me rep even harder...

Why not just be a feminine hrtless man with long hair and feminine interests and hobbies? You can even socialize with females if you want!

>>41447148
blow your shit smoove off

how long after getting blackout drunk is it safe to drink again?

>>41444200
>Height: 5'4"
>Shoulder breadth: 15.5" (bideltoid, not sure if that's what you both are using but i don't have biacromial on hand and don't feel like figuring it out)
>Underbust circumference: 28"
>Waist circumference: 25.5"
>Hip circumference: 30"
>Hip breadth: 11.5"
>waist-to-hip ratio: .85
>shoulder-to-hip ratio: 1.34
I don't have a measuring tape on me, so I used a loose shoestring, wrapped it around myself, and measured it with a ruler. Might be slightly off. I'm small but unmistakably male, especially in terms of shoulders, I feel.

>>41447866
if you're legit asking this question then you know what the answer is
it is not safe for you to drink for a very long time friend but i believe you can make it

watching doom content online feels weird
it's like everyone else is complaining about their jobs or their material circumstances and i'm like idgaf why can't i be an anime girl
all this normie shit about corporate greed and everyone should just be happy with what they have and the fact that i'm not happy with my own body makes me empathize more with the billionaires kek

i feel like shit, i hate being ugly

completely alone and unhappy and empty i hate myself and my life so much

>>41450050
sounds like irl
but if you had money being in your own world tranny would be possible like contrapoints

>>41450198
i'd still need procedures that don't even now to actually pass
and i'd still be a troon dependent on estrogen not becoming illegal

What does it feel like to be desired?

>>41450112
sex with larry

>>41449303
measuring tape is notoriously inaccurate because everyone uses cheap china shit so this is probably a better

>>41450690
it's inaccurate to a 10th of a mm not inches and cms

>>41449303
your height is obviously pretty good, but yeah the other measurements make you kinda stocky. i actually just invented a new ratio to use here, the stature-to-shoulder ratio.
the american female, on average, is 5'4" and has a 14 inch bideltoid, giving them a ratio of 4.62 (in this case, higher is better).
yours is 4.18, which is actually better than mine (4.11).
here's each ratio and what it means
>4.50 or greater means you're fine, you're probably a gigaluckshit
>4.30 to 4.49 is around the mildly clocky area, your shoulders are wide, but still in the female range of possibility.
>4.20 to 4.29 is the clearly clocky area. you'll need great hips to balance out your shoulders, and if you don't have that, you'll look very weird.
>4.10 to 4.19 is the "i can understand if you think it's over" tier. very unbalanced, and if you're tall, you're getting clocked almost instantly, unless you have insane hips. best bet here is to just live with your shoulders very rolled back for the rest of your life and pray nobody notices.
>4.09 and lower is likely permahon tier, no amount of effort will make your shoulders look small. almost no potential to fully body pass.

verdict: yeah it's probably over. only way i can see you body passing is through fatmaxxing, unironically. if your bmi is high enough nobody will notice your skeleton is built like a dwarf.

>>41451291
Thank you for reinforcing my need to rep. If nothing else, at least our shoulders will always be wide enough to hold up the weight of the world pressing down on us, Atlas style.

>>41451516
It's crazy how female their head seems, then you scroll down and realize how massive it looks atop their undeniably male body.

>>41451558
you're such a bitterhon

>>41451558
The head doesn't look female...

I need to be destroyed for my maleness, maleness is the original sin i deserve to be crucified. Im becoming obsessed with true crime again im gonna crash out i hate men why did god make them exist ,, men are murderers torturers rapists, all men are highwaymen I HATE YOU GOD

>kemono party has Tabuley's new animation
yipee!

I just want to be loved.

should I lose weight before starting hrt? I'm in no rush
>>41453978
same but I am unlovable

>>41454287
The copy would never be you. It's a copy.

why yes i both want to be a 6'4 futa goddess and a 5'4 normal fucking cis woman at the same time how could you tell

>>41454342
god that's me

>>41454342
I want to be the 5'4" normal cis woman with a 6'4" futa goddess harem. The tall women will feed me grapes and eat me out.

>>41454347
>>41454358
switching between imagining having zero ambitions and being a shut in or a house wife and literally owning a palace and being catered to by servants

>>41413914 (OP)
i just really want to be hugged and be called a good girl :c

found a text convo i had with a trans person at 14 messaging how i wished i were a girl but writing it off because i would never be pretty

Mom asked me if I still wanted to be a girl or if I was gay today

>>41447128
i started reading that story last night because of this comment. i had to stop because it was making me sad and then i started crying.
t. manmoder

2 people honked at me while i was driving and now i want to cry

I want be hot anime girl. no other will do

>>41449920
erm too late chatGPT said a week and I trusted the experts
just a couple beers though I'm still scared of liquor

>>41453978
everyone loving me as a man ruined my life desu

>>41420905
>what's so bad about a chemical dependency?

>>41421566
Misery loves company, eh?

go away, gincel

>>41421566
Glad to see you nonny.

>QOTT: My idea when I wasn't thinking I was trans was that I was going to finish a bunch of art but I think about how much more pure and clean not having to think ever again will be and that ultimately I wouldn't have to care about not having released a few songs lmao. There's also porn but it gets numb after a while.

RepJournal2(?)
I use twitter probably too much and I developed a crush on someone I follow but is of course in a whole other state. I didn't get that emotional about it at first but I felt something different, she's the type of woman I'd been imagining for the past few months so eventually I went from ecstasy she existed to sadness at how impossible it was. What is weird is that any other time I think about myself I can't cry, I've stood in front of mirrors trying to but it doesn't work. However, when I have a transbian crush it's the only time I can feel real pathetic emotion or come close to crying. I don't get it, is it some dissociation bullshit?

>>41455634
all existence is dependency
But if you fear to be seen as normal guess that's okay
You shouldn't come here

Don't be addicted to this site

>>41454930
>>41447128
I'm sorry, hope you feel better.
I've trooned years ago and reading the story made me a bit uneasy, but overall it was a good experience because I rarely interact with trans stuff outside of this board, and this board is mostly zoomers and younger, they don't know what it was like before

I'm thinking about posting myself on femrepgen and asking them if I pass? I know I'm a failed male, but I'm just wondering to what extent. Not gonna do it. But I think that would be interesting.

>>41420905
i'm scared :(

>>41455634
that isn't what people mean when they say "chemical dependency". This isn't fucking fent, dude.

>>41457024
i'm older zoomer so a lot of it was recognizable by me but i wouldn't say that it was my experience with transitioning. i feel like i'm in a weird in between the area i grew up in was not the most progressive so while people my age did transition as kids there were none in my schools. however once i hot college it was clear that there were plenty of trans people who had been living as their preferred gender for some time and it was just another part of their life. i was too solidified in my "trans people are different from me i just get off to forcefem captions it would be fucked up to suggest that they are fetishists" which kept me repping all through college. but because im not a millennial i had a lot more quality access to info with respect to hrt and transitioning so i was able to come to terms with my gd and start hrt.

i repress because (your answer goes here)

>>41457758
poor loser

>>41457758
Because I'm a pussy. And I'd never pass no matter how hard I tried.

>>41451291
>4.05
It's over, just another in my long list of reasons.

I shall be reborn as a hot anime girl. GOD HAS PROMISED ME THIS

>>41458392
Which god exactly promised you this? What is this god's name?

>>41458392
ask god if manmoders can also get in on this deal

>>41454835
disgusting passive aggressive cunt

>>41458472
>>41458493
I can only have faith that the voice that spoke to me in my sleep was God
I felt compelled to believe in the voice
I have to trust in the promise

>>41458392
same

>>41457758
I was cursed by genetics from birth and have zero chance to successfully transition + my parents don't deserve to be dishonored with a gigahon son

>>41458392
>>41458576
>>41458701
dont believe the lies of the demiurge, he's evil or something

>>41458738
Whatever this is, it doesnt seem like it'll turn me to an anime girl. Hard pass

>>41458738
I just want one more try...

>>41458576
lucky you nobody speak with me when I sleep they just try to kill me and then I wake up

a hot anime girl I shall becoome
MANIFESTTTT

>>41457758
I'd never pass or see myself as a women no matter what, and am too much of a coward to try. I'll just blend into the background until I inevitably rope.

>>41459067
yep, coward, shoulders to wide, would need browbone reduction...

>>41439728
tehehe being classy pretty milf sedducing cute shy twinks. maybe as a teacher... it happens irl quite a bit.

I want to be an anime girl

>>41460770
Me too anon, me too...

>>41460791
It's not fair. I hate it. It's the only thing I want and I can't have it.

Just trust the plan anon. That's all you can do at the end of the day.

i'm thinking about socially detransitioning and repping on hrt

Making a /repgen/ server in the afterlife. Futa and female only.

Watanare is peak

drunk at 5AM catching up on this season's latest gender bender isekino
truly no better way to pass the time while waiting for my own turn to become an anime girl

>>41460848
YWNBAR

>>41461042
What drink and what anime

I cant stop wanting to be an anime girl

>>41461097
same

>>41461071
Sapporo + a little pinot grigio
Yasei no Last Boss ga Arawareta!

>>41461103
I might watch it when it's finished. I can't watch ongoing anime anymore. I'm drinking Umeshu and soda and watching cute lesbians

Maybe I need to start anime repping again. Worked really well as escapism to distract me from the real world, not sure why I ever stopped desu.
>>41461097
same

>>41461125
It really helps me to compartmentalize my life. When I'm at work I can be a functioning adult, but then when I get home I can imagine I'm an anime girl. It keeps the small sane part of me from being contaminated.

>>41461117
understandable desu, but I like having a couple different things to look forward to at different points during the week
yuri isn't usually my thing but that sounds fun, enjoy anon
is it good umeshu or the shitty kikkoman kind?

>>41461164
It's this one. idk where it ranks on the Umeshu tier list but it's the only one they have at my local bottle shop.

>>41461175
I've never tried that one but it looks pretty good desu

I need to get into CYOAs again so I can have more fuel for my constant maladaptive daydreaming

>>41461014
me on the left

the cooming will continue until reppers become anime girls

>>41461283
What's going to happen when we're too old to coom

>>41461342
we prepare for final ascent into anime girlhood

>>41461262
heh fatty mc fat fat

Already had a very prominent brow ridge at 14 award. It all happened so fast too, within less than a year of hitting puberty. Who else here was rapidly mutilated by male puberty before you could even comprehend what was happening?

my feminine behavioral traits went by way of the scrodinger's cat

they promised me so much....

I dont have dysphoria but i'm objectively mad ugly and its killing me. I also be ame a hermit neet at age 15 so i failed to get properly socialized into a man. Got into college recently and everyone peers included treats me like a kid even though i'm a year older than most.

I guess all if any tranny thoughts i have come from the fact that i failed to become a man, and i feel bad about the way my body(and especially the face) look, so i've become attracted to an ideology that also coincidentally embraces both. I dont think any chemicals would help me. My skull is just horrid and nothing short of plastic surgery would make sense.
The biggest issue i have is how much of life this retarded issue has made me waste. I genuinely dont feel like i lived more than 10 full days since i was a kid. I just dissociate and fast forward for years at a time. I'm 22 already and i've done nothing. Will probably fail out of college too at this rate.

I just dont know what to do. I wish i could get a lobotomy pill that'd make me feel numb to it but thats judt more dissociation.

Any advice?sorry.
I'm having a real hard time even though the issue isnt even real.

>>41461920
seems like a rope situation, i hate being ugly too tho

>>41462054
I dont wanna rope.
I plan to save up some money, get a prescription and hrtrep once i move out but i doubt that'll do anything, and it's years away as well.

gender dysphoria is a real thing and transitioning is a manmade proposed solution
I hate the premise of "repressing", it implicates you as someone not living as your true self as if somehow the more "real you" exists outside your body in a Platonic perfect form. This cannot make sense if you believe at all in materialism. You are your body and transitioning is rejection

>>41461920
i was already two years older than everybody throughout school and college because parents fucked up and put me two years late in school as a child i didn't even get any neet rest

>>41461920
before I really recognised my dysphoria I thought I was just unbeatably ugly. I would think I'm so ugly everyone is staring at me, they want to kill me, etc
It's just a way of coping before you realise imo

>>41462091
that won t make you feel any better either
'hrtrep' lmao

>>41462174
sex with larry

>>41462174
I dont think itll have any profound changes physically or mentally but i feel so bad i might as well try.
>>41462161
Nah ive actually been made fun of for looking like a retard before.
Some people are just ugly.

why is it so hard for hrt drones to understand that i wish i was born a woman i don't wish i was me with modifications layered over to mask it

>>41462196
yet you're posting in repgen about having tranny thoughts? both can be true

>>41462220
Most trannies wish the same but trooning is a cope that works (for them). It's better just to ignore them, they're not wrong it just isn't applicable to us

>>41462196
Even if you set your expectations low, expect to be disappointed anyway.

>>41462254
I have none.>>41462236
My initial post explains why i would find comraderie with trannies.
Not everyone with gender and self-image issues is a troon. Some people are just developmentally screwed in terms of psychology.

beating reppers until they take hrt then biting their breasts

I will continue to be unhappy until I wake up as an anime girl

>realized last night Ive been consciously repping for a decade

heh

Don't know how much longer I can rep

>>41462769
Same
I think I'll try to turn my life around and save up for FFS

>>41462807
My goal is to win the lottery, claim it as my current name, buy a house, go on pills and get surgery, change the name and then no one can bug me for money.

its foolproof.

>>41462991
>lose one lottery (genetic)
>this next one though...
lotteries always bug me because I know it's a waste but the non-zero chance of one entry...

>>41463127
like i said...foolproof

if I only had a hrt repper gf to struggle with I could live through it

>>41463278
wya

>>41413914 (OP)
Today I had a lucid dream and so I just decided to suck cock inside the dream. Am I gay?

>>41458738
I wish they continued this, this comic is like 10 years old by now.

>>41458545
Really? Well I said in response that I don't want to be a girl anymore (I do but I know I can't and I'd be hideous as a tranny) and I'm not gay (but I do have meta attraction)

the cure to gender dysphoria is opiates. this feels goos as fuck

>>41462419
can you say I should transition despite the fact it came from porn addiction and that I deserve love despite being an evil degenerate faggot

>>41465044
sick. make sure to come back in a year and let us know how it's all going

>>41464101
>can do anything you want
>first thought is to suck cock
nigga you are gayer than gay

>>41465336
I am disgusted thinking at it now, but when I woke up I was very aroused and busted one while it was fresh in my mind.

Whatever, doesn't matter, even if I were I'm never coming out

>>41464101
How did the penis look tho.
Quick check to see if youre gay or just pornrotten

>>41465375
I don't even consume porn other than half-naked anime girl images I download from /v/ and do nothing with cause I fap to my agp fantasies eyes closed instead.

It looked... triangular? Like that Dreepy Gen8 Pokemon

>>41464101
Last dream I had, I was in a class that turned out to be some kind of wife class and the teacher kicked me out halfway through the course while giving me a sad look, but he also handed me $200. Then my neighbor turned out to be a graduate and I had to be jealous of her and her husband while helping her put up Christmas lights. Dreams are wacky.

>>41461920
>I'm having a real hard time even though the issue isnt even real.
fake dysphoria being a real condition is not talked about enough

>>41465473
I want all fake dysphoria reppers to come forward so we can gather all of our experiences and psychoanalyze ourselves in order to find a cure for our mental illness.
With the power of friendship, we will cure our fake dysphoria!

>>41465494
>I want all fake dysphoria reppers to come forward so we can gather all of our experiences and psychoanalyze ourselves
I don't know if this is fake dysphoria or not, but it sure feels like it. For some weird reason, when I get up early I genuinely hate how tall I am and how broad my shoulders are, but as the day goes on, I become more and more numb to it. I never feel that suicidal hatred of my own body trannies claim to have (most of my suicidal thoughts come from a lack of purpose), because it's better to have an ugly but functional vessel rather than one that doesn't work at all. I don't have any major health or mobility issues, and I'm grateful for that.
Would I still change things if I actually could? Yes.
Do I daydream all day of who I could've been if I had a body I actually liked? Also yes, but this one works fine, I guess.

the last sex dream i had was about being a wife attending a swingers party with my husband. after some sort of selection process, i was paired off with a random guy and we went to a bedroom. i was sucking his dick when i coomed and woke up

I'd only go out with you if you're on estrogen, I don't want people to think I'm gay.

The only alcohol i ever drink is 40% whiskey because it helps me project faux masculinity

I've never had a sex dream. I only ever remember nightmares

>wake up
>not an anime girl
day ruined

trying to convince myself not to spend my next paycheck on hrt before it comes in challenge

Walking around my coastal city seeing hons with their buds looming down the street. Good repfuel

>>41465267
this is perfectly sustainable so long as i dont go too hard

Why the hell did i have to get a norwood 2. Repping would be easy if I could just have my hair

>detrans
>develop norwood 2-3 repping
>resume pathetic hrt repping
tale as old as time

why wont God just turn me into an anime girl?

>>41466165
me at 4pm today

>>41466939
YWNBAR

>>41467216
you woke up as a short-haired anime girl?

>>41467310
sadly no, I woke up as not an anime girl

>>41467236
I wish

>>41467431
you are literally not repping stfu
there is another gen for you

honestly the only reason im not transitioning is because I think life will be better by staying as a male. nobody sees trans women as real women even if i could pass. so basically there's not really any choice.

No hope but inertia

New thread:
>>41467682
>>41467682
>>41467682