Thread for discussions about self harm and mutual support

bending over backwards edition!

Hey
>How are you doing today?
>Any plans for today?
>When was the last time you hurt yourself?
>Why did you hurt yourself?
>Is there anything bothering you right now?

Here's a bunch of helpful links

>a long list of self harm alternatives (thank you muddy):
https://imgur.io/a/7Q2zgw7

>a first aid post cuting:
https://www.lifesigns.org.uk/first-aid-for-self-injury-and-self-harm/

>a wound care guide:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CsvJs8qNCVkHWHKekMSmCn6qn0GBEcgnq9fIqlA6Uv0/mobilebasic

>a bpd workbook:
https://d-pdf.com/book/1781/read

> bpd Information Book (anon said it's exceptionally good)
https://annas-archive.org/md5/e678a1e6375e512f483a04e8291c9183

> bdbt (dialectical behavioral therapy)
workbook is intended for BPD but can work for anyone:
https://cursosdepsicologia.com.ar/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/THEDIA1.pdf

Please don't post any drastic images and if you have to, spoiler them

>>81532936 (OP)
Been clean for 6 years.

>>81532936 (OP)
Oh a barefoot Hooni cute

>>81532953
hello
good work anon :]
is life going well for you?

>>81532936 (OP)
hey cat.
>pic
he's really trying to stretch hehe.
how are you doing today cat?

>>81532953
that's a very impressive amount of time good job!

>>81533930
hey hey
> trying to stretch hehe.
even hooni is stretching now
>how are you doing today cat?
okay, today was nice and chill, I had ordered some pants a while ago but they weren't ready right and so i ordered another ones and they got here and they're tood :]
Other than getting that package I didn't leave the house
How are you doing?

clean for a year this month... or next, don't remember
have had thoughts of relapsing, mostly due to losing a lot of friend groups (online) and other personal issues
i'm holding out pretty well i would say, either that or it's because i don't have direct access to sharp objects.

>>81534241
>even hooni is stretching now
yea it's the hot new thing I guess hehe.
>so i ordered another ones and they got here
well that's good you at least got those pairs, and that there good. do you mainly shop for pants?
>didn't leave the house
fair enough then. I don't think I've left for a bit either.
>How are you doing?
I'm okay, just chilling I guess. nothing of note so far.

>>81534414
hey Anon. that is a extremely impressive amount of time good job.
>losing a lot of friend groups
oh that's rough, losing friends is probably one of the worst feelings ever.

>>81525724
>ill try to get this far again
no reason you won't get there. i believe in you.

>nono its alright dont worry
ok. ^^ but if you think you can't talk about something and feel like you need to, you know where to find me.

>its literally just across the sea theres no reason not to but i havent gotten around to it yet make sure to take lots of pics :D
it's not something that's constantly on your mind, but i'm sure it'll be worth your time if you ever get there. i'll try, but i'll mostly spend my time in a house in the hills, so i'm not sure if there'll be lots of opportunities.

>cant really convince myself of that but thank you
i know. i also can't deal with people being nice to me ^^

>>81525870
>I'm already on YouTube but anime is very smart will do that ^^
what did you watch?

>they usually just help me fall asleep
same. i'm glad my usual guy streams deep into the night so i always have something to put on. do you have someone you regularly fall asleep to?

>>81532936 (OP)
hey catbro! what's up?

>>81532953
good job, dude :D

>>81533930
hi gator! did you sleep well?

>>81534414
also good job! :> sorry you lost your connections, though. you're always welcome to hang out here or vent if you feel like it.

>i don't have direct access to sharp objects.
maybe that's for the best.

>>81534414
hello
good job staying clean ^^
>had thoughts of relapsing, mostly due to losing a lot of friend groups
that's sad, sorry to hear about that anon
but you still have other friends right?

Anyone else get so angry that they just start biting themselves? I've been biting the side of my wrist a lot, sometimes subconsciously.

>>81534490
>what did you watch?
I honestly don't remember lol, I slept pretty early last night.
>usual guy streams deep into the night
oh yea that perfect then, late night streamers are usually better anyways.
>you have someone you regularly fall asleep to?
not really, it changes every few days.
>hi gator! did you sleep well?
hey yuanon! slept pretty well, also woke up early. did you?

>>81534753
>they just start biting themselves?
sometimes.
>biting the side of my wrist a lot, sometimes subconsciously.
doing it subconsciously doesn't sound too good, better then cutting tho ^^

>not pepper spraying or tasering yourself
it's way more painful and doesn't leave any scars
cutting is for weak attention whoring bitches

I still bite my arms and hands really hard when I get angry. Idk how to make it stop. Even if I'm aware I'm doing it and want to stop, it's like my body is on autopilot and I'm not in control.

>>81534489
>the hot new thing
yea ^^
>do you mainly shop for pants?
not necessarily, I rarely buy clothes but lately sorta started running out of them and decided to buy new ones so I got some shirts and the luckily fit me well and then i decided to get pants and that was a bit tricky as you could see, the next thing I'll start looking for is hoodies but I'll leave that till autumn/winter I think
>don't think I've left for a bit either.
that's alright, how are you spending your day I watched some spooky stuff on yt and also decided to rewatch mad god
>just chilling I guess. nothing of note
are you going to play with your friend today?

>>81534490
Hellu yuanon c:
I'm well, unfortunately didn't pet any cats today but just stayed inside and chilled and I got the pants and this time they're good, even smell like a new clothes from a store
How are you?

>>81534753
I used to but not really anymore
what makes you so angry?

>>81534970
hello anon
>Idk how to make it stop
sounds difficult
Maybe you could gradually start biting into something else instead of you arm, I'm not sure what you could use but just don't use something hard so you don't destroy your teeth

>>81534508
>but you still have other friends right?
5 friends online and 2 friends irl
rest people i talk to are a single discord server but i don't consider anyone there my friend

>>81534924
>I honestly don't remember lol, I slept pretty early last night.
can't have been that good, then ^^

>late night streamers are usually better anyways.
and even better: he plays games i don't really care about, so it doesn't bother me when i miss some because i fell asleep.

>it changes every few days.
guess it doesn't really matter, as long as you can fall asleep to it.

>slept pretty well, also woke up early. did you?
not really. woke up way to often because of the heat, but also not terribly bad. luckily i didn't have to get up early.

>>81535210
>unfortunately didn't pet any cats today
is there a worse fate? :[

>just stayed inside and chilled
also a good use of a day ^^

>I got the pants and this time they're good
finally. took them long enough to send you a proper pair. hope they'll last you a long time.

>How are you?
i'm good. work was alright, my boss rewarded me with a gift card, which was nice and now i'm mentally prepare to strech in the heat of my room... the heat is the only thing i don't lime about today. ^^'

>>81532936 (OP)
I hate this stupid thread. What's even the purpose of it? Just stop making it. It sucks. It's a circlejerkoff.

>>81535270
that's a bunch of friends
it's good you have them, do you hang with the irl ones sometimes??

>>81535455
>there a worse fate? :[
idkk D:
>good use of a day ^^
I fully agree :3
>took them long enough
yeah but at least it worked out in the end
>hope they'll last you a long time.
me too, when I bought them it said they're 50% and then original price was pretty high so hopefully their quality is good
>with a gift card
nice :D
just money would be better though ^^'
I feel it's useless to buy money that you can't spend wherever you want
Maybe he got ir as a gift and didn't want it lol
>strech in the heat of my room...
oooa make sure to drink something cold afterwards!!
It was pretty hot today too

>>81535472
oh I'm sorry, did I accidentally kill your racebait thread?

>>81535764
>oh I'm sorry, did I accidentally kill your racebait thread?
What are you talking about loser?

>>81535764
>do you hang with the irl ones sometimes??
hung out yesterday with one of them, went to the mall and ate some fast food. i don't feel too comfortable with any of them except for one person and they're online, i've always felt like i couldn't express myself fully out of the fear of being judged and so on
i don't have many hobbies, i watch anime from time to time, but almost always leave shows unfinished, either out of not being in the mood to watch anything or just being demotivated of everything
i still indulge in self destructive behaviour like substances, illicit or not, so i guess i still have to work on that too

>>81535774
I guess it was a "fembot" thread then....

cmon anon I'm just yanking yer chain, why r you so angry?

>>81535810
>don't feel too comfortable with any of them
at least you still had a nice time in the mall by the sound of it
>>81535810
>couldn't express myself fully out of the fear of being judged
would you even want to express yourself like that?
>watch anime
do you have a favorite?
>leave shows unfinished
it happens, you don't have to finish them anyway as long as it entertained you for a while, that's enough
>still have to work on that too
sounds difficult

>>81532936 (OP)
>How are you doing today?
I had too much caffeine yesterday and couldn't sleep last night.
>Any plans for today?
I went into work early and requested to leave early and actually got it. So I slept all day.
Tomorrow I make double due to it being a recognized holiday, so now I'm ready to chill there.
>Is there anything bothering you right now?
I missed an accepted job application in my email in January, but it reopened today so I applied again. Now not getting the promotion I wanted doesn't matter as much.
I guess I'm going to be collecting more contact info of my work friends before I leave all together.
The one thing that bothers me about this is this one girl I wanted to talk to more. She's my age, lives in my town, just broke up with someone, and very friendly to everyone. So persuing her romantically seems like a good idea but I don't want to burden her since she often gets harassed.
>something that helpped me.
I listened to a philosophize this ep on Ernst Bloch. He describes this idea of humans having an excess of hope. When we're disappointed in reality being different from our desired outcome, this is because our hope wasn't calibrated to reality. Therefore, disappointment is the recalibration of how to hope.
Since I failed at getting the summer job I wanted, I should be taking this as a sign of how to approach my next career. At least that's the spot I'm at and I wanted to share that somewhere.
>>81532953
hi anon,
> 6 years.
that's great, I hope the urge never comes back!
>>81533930
hi gator,
>he's really trying to stretch hehe.
I need to start stretching like that. My legs haven't been able to do curls in two weeks.
>>81534970
hi anon,
>I still bite my arms and hands really hard when I get angry.
that's okay. I think you're just trying to find an outlit. But if you want control back, I think it taks small steps. I bite things I'm carrying alot. A whitle, a card. Maybe if it's a choice it will be less of an autopilot.

limit.

>>81535889
>do you have a favorite?
sayonara zetsubou sensei
still have to finish the other seasons, at least i managed to finish the first one

>>81535210
hi cat,
>even smell like a new clothes from a store
I love new stuff smell. I never get in the thrift stores I go to.
Personally cut grass has one of the best smells. My dog won't stop rolling in it.
>>81534490
hi yuanon
>i also can't deal with people being nice to me ^^
I think you're doing a good job just being here.

>>81535889
>cmon anon I'm just yanking yer chain, why r you so angry?
Yank it harder.

getting sleepy ~w~

>>81535906
hey cynic
>Now not getting the promotion I wanted doesn't matter as much.
I'm glad something helped you not worry about it
it's all in the past anyway

>>81535935
>least i managed to finish the first one
well it's okay to be slow about it
you loose nothing and gain more enjoyment out of what you like

>81535967
well guess who's not going to get replied to anymore

>>81532936 (OP)
Where does one begin with self-harm?

>>81535210
>rarely buy clothes
probably for the best yea. and definitely best to get new ones when your running out.
>next thing I'll start looking for is hoodies
hoodies are very nice and comfy. sadly the worst time for them tho.
>how are you spending your day
just looking at random clothes online lol.
>watched some spooky stuff on yt and also decided to rewatch mad god
spooky stuff on YouTube can definitely be great or pretty bad I feel. and rewatching good movies is smart, better than watching a new bad one.
>are you going to play with your friend today?
I don't think he was feeling to well so we didn't but I don't know exactly.

>>81535455
>can't have been that good, then ^^
lol i guess that's a fair point hehe.
>don't really care about, so it doesn't bother me when i miss some
that's perfect, and you won't get spoiled fo anything as well
>as long as you can fall asleep to it.
yea I usually can, sometimes i do just have to turn everything off tho.
>because of the heat, but also not terribly bad.
oh the heat is the worst. and sucks for sleeping.

>>81535906
>caffeine yesterday and couldn't sleep last night
big debuff of caffeine. I rarely have any but I always sleep worse when I do.
>make double due to it being a recognized holiday,
Ooo that's nice and perfect then!
>burden her since she often gets harassed.
oh that sucks she does, just make sure your friendly I'd say, she'd probably like you a lot more then the people harassing
>hi gator,
hi cynic.
>My legs haven't been able to do curls in two weeks.
oh jeez, curls do seem pretty hard anyways tho.

>>81536072
>Where does one begin with self-harm?
personally it started out of curiosity, i didn't understand the concept and why it felt 'good' until i started doing it myself.

>>81536153
Where abouts on my body should I try out to get a 'taste' and what should I use? I've never self harmed before

>>81536072
it's best not to start
why do you want to?

>>81536293
I need something different in my life

>>81536063
>getting sleepy ~w~
goodnight cat.
I ain't tired, but I'll probably take something to go to sleep so I can be 100% tomorrow.
>it's all in the past anyway
Yeah it's just hard to remind yourself of that a lot.
>>81536106
>I always sleep worse when I do.
I think I was literally one coffee over.
>she'd probably like you a lot more then the people harassing
Yeah, I think I just have to find time to talk with her. We're all staying for double pay tomorrow, so I guess that's what my next mission is.
Hope your day's been ok gator.
>>81536229
I wouldn't hurt yourself anon. It's not a good habit. If you're going to no matter what, just stay away from vains and major organs.

>>81535764
>idkk D:
well, if there is i don't wanna find out.

>it worked out in the end
all's well that ends well, but i have to congratulate you on your patience. i would just have given up at some point.

>so hopefully their quality is good
let's hope so. mine tend to last about 1-2 years, no matter the quality. :/

>just money would be better though ^^'
would be, but he can get a tax deduction for those cards, so it's a bit of a trade-off. it's for amazon though, so i should be able to find something eventually. maybe some books.

>Maybe he got ir as a gift and didn't want it lol
nah, we can print those with our register, so he went over and got me one. ^^

>make sure to drink something cold afterwards!! It was pretty hot today too
i did, but i'm not sure it was a smart idea... was some mate-tea i bought, so now i'm wide awake. (o.o) is it more bearable for you now?

>>81535906
hi cynic! :D

>I had too much caffeine yesterday and couldn't sleep last night.
nice. i had too much today. :>

>So I slept all day.
holy scrambled sleep schedule, batman! :0

>Tomorrow I make double due to it being a recognized holiday, so now I'm ready to chill there.
sounds good. don't forget to take it easy, ok?

>I guess I'm going to be collecting more contact info of my work friends before I leave all together.
good idea. are you happy you got that other job?

>The one thing that bothers me about this is this one girl I wanted to talk to more
there's always the one that got away :/

>At least that's the spot I'm at and I wanted to share that somewhere.
thanks for sharing. it's an interesting idea. i have to think about that.

>>81535955
>I think you're doing a good job just being here.
thank you. i'm doing my very best o7

>>81536063
>getting sleepy ~w~
bed time soon?

>>81536106
>you won't get spoiled fo anything as well
true. worst stream i watched to fall asleep to was northernlion. i always wanted to stay up and keep watching ^^'

>sometimes i do just have to turn everything off tho.
yeah sometimes i wake up to it again and very sleepily turn it off. and sometimes i wake up at my normal time and they're still going. that's a fucked up sleep schedule, even for a streamer.

>the heat is the worst. and sucks for sleeping.
it does. last couple of days i always woke up drenched in sweat :/

>>81536072
you could try hurting your finger because thats easily explainable but like that anon said it's been if you don't

>>81536488
>i had too much today. :>
oh no. I hope you don't end up losing brain capacity like I did this morning.
>holy scrambled sleep schedule, batman! :0
I'll just read myself to sleep and hope that works.
>don't forget to take it easy, ok?
it'll just be hot, it fine.
>are you happy you got that other job?
yeah, it's a firefighting department. So I at least get a pension and can transfer later.
>i'm doing my very best o7
That's all anyone can do.

I'll try to get some sleep now, see you guys later.

>>81536456
>think I was literally one coffee over.
that really sucks then, hopefully next time you won't need as much coffee.
>so I guess that's what my next mission is.
okay best of luck on your special mission. go get them! hehe
>Hope your day's been ok gator.
thanks it's hehe boring.

>>81536530
>always wanted to stay up and keep watching ^^'
he is very funny, also unique and a lot of the stuff is about watching hehe.
>wake up at my normal time and they're still going
omg, their schedule must really be awful then lol. I don't even know how you'd stream that long.
>always woke up drenched in sweat :/
oh that's probably the worst way to wake up, just icky.

>>81536707
>I hope you don't end up losing brain capacity like I did this morning.
i probably will, but tomorrow is a holiday here as well and i don't have to be anywhere. just have to do some laundry, which i think i'll be able to handle. ^^

>I'll just read myself to sleep and hope that works.
did it work?

>it'll just be hot, it fine.
worse enough :[

>it's a firefighting department. So I at least get a pension and can transfer later.
and you get paid to stay fit. always a bonus.

>That's all anyone can do.
word.

>I'll try to get some sleep now, see you guys later.
sleep tight

>>81536733
>he is very funny, also unique and a lot of the stuff is about watching hehe.
i really need to catch one of his streams again. do you know if he still streams with other streamers on the regular?

>their schedule must really be awful then lol. I don't even know how you'd stream that long.
those streams are reserved for the the games they really want to play, but even then it seems excessive. the wild thing is that's basically his free time. he streams on his main channel til 12:00 am and then switches to a second one that's not monetized to not tank the viewer average on his main one.

>that's probably the worst way to wake up, just icky.
at least my bed is big enough so i can just look for a dry spot and keep sleeping.

i'm going sleep now. good night!

just relapsed,
I hate myself so much its not even funny anymore. I just wanna die at this point fuck me

>>81536922
>you know if he still streams with other streamers on the regular?
from what I see no, or if anyone just his friends that aren't to popular.
>really want to play
okay that makes sense then, I'd only play a game I like that long too.
>not monetized to not tank the viewer average on his main one.
oh that's actually very smart then. must be annoying switching tho.
>so i can just look for a dry spot and keep sleeping.
oh hehe that's great you can then.

>>81537132
goodnight sleep well.

>>81537204
sorry to hear that. self hatred sucks, honestly the worst.

>>81537264
cant do anything about it if I cant really change it, i just want to fucking die, theres no solution for me, and what can tou do about it? I can't even talk about it with my mom cuz she'll get crazy, and my so called friends would just call me crazy and or a fag. I just cant stand it, and its not that im a lonely fag, its that im stuck with myself being just a fucking retard.

>>81537312
I get it, definitely harder when it's something you can't change. just wish it never happened at all.
maybe you could find someone you trust to talk about it, talking about that sort of stuff usually helps.

I ate way to much today.

goodnight bump

>>81532953
So was I, but I relapsed the other day (I don't know if the regulars remember me, but I'm the anon who asked about a link not working a couple weeks back). Now I can't stop thinking about doing it more; I feel like I've awakened something unsettling (not to come across as phony or pretentious; I'm always afraid I do; but I really do feel like this was just dormant, and anything associated with it made me uncomfortable, but now I'm not as uncomfortable about it, and on some level wanting to do it worse than before, and after six years of control I'm honestly frightened).

Does anyone else feel like they really want a romantic partner with this same issue? I'm not talking about this as a fetish, I mean just someone with whom you can identify, you can support, someone who can support you too, you can trust, etc? I'm tired of feeling alone; I only ever see someone with this issue every few years or so.

I know if I frequent these threads I won't be as alone, but I feel like I still would be. I'm no good at socializing, especially in groups, where everyone is having different conversations. I feel like I'm always a lurker, especially in real life.

I didn't mean to go on, everyone. I just wanted to say something about this for once. I've been thinking about being more of a regular in these threads; you all seem like a good bunch.

Good night, everyone; I have to get up at 4:30, as usual. Maybe I'll post tomorrow.

>>81532936 (OP)
Feeling a lil sad today might cut soon if the day gets any worse

>self harm
Why not lift weights? It's also painful and makes you feel good afterwards.

>>81532936 (OP)
I don't understand why you people cut yourselves instead of going to the gym.

Either way you feel physical pain if you push hard enough, and even working out can sometimes feel like you're being ripped and torn so-to-speak due to the microtears in the muscle.

That and working out is actually good for you so idk why you guys cut instead of getting similar, if not better satisfaction from actually doing good for your body instead of destroying it.

Just saying.

>>81539148
>>81539258
>just go to the gym, bro! what do you mean you're so miserable that it takes you an hour to even get out of bed? you're just making it up. it's in your head mental illness is not real

bumper meow nuya

>>81540955
thanks. was also going to do that.

how's it going, everyone?

mornin everyone

.>81540974
Hello
how was your sleep?
>going, everyone?
I woke up not long ago and I'm just watching stuff on my phone, I don't plan to to out today ao it's just going to be a chill day
wbu?

>>81541305
whoops, I meant to reply to >>81540974

>>81541305
hey! (^-^)

>how was your sleep?
not great, but ok. fell asleep quite late, as i thought i would, but woke up around the same time as always, so i was a bit sluggish at first. how about you? did you sleep well?

>I woke up not long ago and I'm just watching stuff on my phone, I don't plan to to out today ao it's just going to be a chill day wbu?
pretty much the same. on top of that i'll do some laundry, prepare my luggage and clean the place a bit, so i don't have to when i come back. that's pretty much it.

hey everyone. slept too long. and kinda worrying about my friend.

>>81538139
well relapse happens. and 86s good to remember you can definitely get there again. that is a extremely sucky thing about addiction and self harm, it's just hard to stop again when you relapse.

i do understand wanting that, I don't think you need someone who does self harm to support them and for them to support you tho.

that's fair and these threads do help me feel a bit less alone, but them themselves wouldn't make me feel not lonely.
and Goodnight sleep well

>>81538416
I'm sorry to hear that, wanna talk about why your sad? I hope your okay.

>>81539148
>>81539258
I never understood this form of thinking, obviously working out is very good and is great for your mental health but some people just don't want to, like myself I don't wanna gain muscle or anything.

>>81540974
it's going okay. had to quickly write this. how are you?

>>81541305
good morning cat hope you have a great day.

>>81541509
>kinda worrying about my friend.
why? what's up?

>it's going okay. had to quickly write this
good to know. are you in a hurry?

>how are you?
i'm good, but i think i'll be a bit busy today.

I was a cutter when I was a teenager.
now I'm 27 years old with these gay ass scars.
I highly reccomend that you stop cutting.

>>81541431
>not great, but ok.
it's good you gtany sleep after that mate tea hah
>did you sleep well?
yep, I even had a strange dream but I don't remember much about it
>prepare my luggage and clean
hope you don't forget anything important ^^
when are you going to leave? few days?

>>81541509
Hello
>kinda worrying about my friend.
why?
>cat hope you have a great day.
thank you
you too
do you have any plans? I don't heh
I'm just going play games and chill

>>81542068
If I see scars like this I make a mental note to stay as far away from that psycho as possible. This thread shouldn't exist and you people should all kill yourselves already if you insist on going on like this. Just thought you should all know.

>>81542119
I know you won't believe me, but I'm totally fine now. I was just crazy as a teenager.
This is why I hate these scars. I know people judge me negatively when they see them.

>>81542156
At least you didn't get one of those retarded semicolon tattoos, that's about the only thing worse I can think of. I've met those people, eugh. Dude I was insane in high school too, but I wasn't the whiny and attentionseeking type that needs scars for people to have to look at. I just got on all fours and rammed my head into the wall when I needed pain, few bangs and the rage is shaken out of my skull. Whereas what you guys are doing is just begging for pity. Weak. The attentionseeking aspect of this type of self harm is what differentiates you people as something to avoid at all costs.

>>81541795
>why? what's up?
it's probably nothing.
>are you in a hurry?
I was just right about to take a shower.
>i'm good, but i think i'll be a bit busy today.
oh well sorry to hear you'll be busy, nice your good tho.

>>81542089
hey cat.
>why?
it's probably nothing, I just worry.
>do you have any plans?
not really just be lazy.
>I'm just going play games and chill
that does sound pretty nice and fun. hope you have a good time.

>>81542206
yeah those semi-colon people are gay. y'know, those fags who make self harm part of their identity.
It's genuinley not for attention though, at least not in my case. I always kept my cutting hidden and never told anyone about it. It wasn't for attention, I simply liked it because I was insane. I used to love the pain and seeing the blood flow down my arm. And I love cutting down to the white layer of fat or whatever it is. Those were the best cuts.
When I think about it now it makes me feel sick.

>>81542068
Hey anon
it's good you're not doing it anymore though it sucks y still gotta suffer because of it
Do you think about getting a cover up tattoo?
and how's life going for you in general?

>>81542267
yeah, I have thought about getting tattoos to cover them up. It's gonna be expensive though and I don't really like sleeve tattoos - do you have any tattoo ideas that aren't sleeves?
I'm a NEET on disability. I live alone in an apartment that the government pays for. I've got it pretty good actually. I consider myself very lucky. Having my own apartment is great. I'm considering going back to school to learn a trade.
Thanks for asking btw

How are you? Are you a self harmer too? Former self harmer?

I feel like relapsing once again. I just did it yesterday. I don't know anymore.

>>81542228
>probably nothing, I just worry.
try not! o worry then :<
it's not worth wasting ur time like that
>really just be lazy.
that's okay, have a nice lazy day
though you should find something to do you're not bored
>hope you have a good time.
thanks
I decided to go to the garage

>>81542326
>do you have any tattoo ideas that aren't sleeves?
no, sorry
I can't really think of something that would cover it and not be a sleeve
also just so you know, your scares don't look bad, they blend in pretty well
>own apartment is great
it does sound really good desu
I still live with my parents
>considering going back to school to learn a trade.
what kind? you think you can handle school?
I am attending university but man I dislike it
>Thanks for asking btw
no problem
>How are you?
fairy well, it's summer vacation time so I catdo whatever I wanna throw by september we have to finish working on our graduation project which I have yet to start working on
>Are you a self harmer too? Former self harmer?
not sure if I'm a former self harmer, I do it very very rarely now but I don't really wanna stop completely because (I know it sounds kinda wierd) I like having the ability to hurt myself at will without being scared of pain or having that instinct telling you not to do it

>>81542893
I better if you don't do it anon
it's not like you lost or something by relapsing yesterday
How long was your streak?

>>81542089
>it's good you gtany sleep after that mate tea hah
true. i guess i'm still kinda used to having it in my body.

>I even had a strange dream but I don't remember much about it
same. i'm really bad at remembering dreams :/

>hope you don't forget anything important ^^ when are you going to leave? few days?
i hope not, but if i do i'll just have to buy it when i arrive. i'm leaving tomorrow. well, technically on saturday, since we'll depart around 12:00 - 2:00 am.

>>81542228
>it's probably nothing
hm. i guess so.

>I was just right about to take a shower.
i should as well, but i still need to clean up a bit. :[

>sorry to hear you'll be bus
all good. nothing to important. just some preparations before i leave. also don't want to return to a total mess in a few weeks. taking a break now tho

>>81542949
>try not! o worry then :<
I'll try not to yea.
>okay, have a nice lazy day
hehe thanks I'll try too.
>though you should find something to do you're not bored
yea I'll figure something out, may try working out in some way.
>decided to go to the garage
cool what did you do there?

>>81543262
>but i still need to clean up a bit. :[
aw well hopefully you can have a nice one after you clean.
>preparations before i leave.
very smart then, definitely best to prepare as much and soon as you can.
>return to a total mess in a few weeks
oh yea that would just be awful coming back and have to clean it something.

did it again, gave myself a black eye and bruises across my face, 2nd time in 4 weeks, just as the last time finished healing, luckily i can work from home, but I probably wasted another weekend, can't really go out in public like this

>>81543262
>guess i'm still kinda used to having it in my body.
luckily
>i'm really bad at remembering dreams :/
I'm not that bad as long as I think to remember the dream right after waking up
>i'm leaving tomorrow
:0
it's good then you decided on mostly resting today

>>81543317
>may try working out in some way.
what kind of work out?
I decided to do some sewing and added a pocket to my bikebag
>what did you do there?
just checked the bike for tomorrow's bikeride

>>81543523
>black eye and bruises
that sounds bad anon
why did you do it again?

>>81544138
>what kind of work out?
basically just a something I found on the internet for your lower body. but I have way to little energy today
>decided to do some sewing and added a pocket to my bikebag
Ooo that's cool. and a pocket does seem like it would be very useful to have.
>checked the bike for tomorrow's bikeride
smart, and hope that goes well for tomorrow and you see cool stuff.

>>81544645
>but I have way to little energy today
can't blame you I have very little energy as well I'm not sure why
>that's cool
yeah at least I had something to do while my phone was charging
>tomorrow and you see cool stuff.
I probably will :]
who knows maybe I'll even find another kitty to pet

>>81543317
>aw well hopefully you can have a nice one after you clean.
i'll do the cleaning tomorrow. everything took a bit longer than expected today. i'll still take one later before bed.

>definitely best to prepare as much and soon as you can.
yup. hope i don't forget stuff like my charging cable or earbuds tomorrow.

>that would just be awful coming back and have to clean it something.
yeah. usually i don't care much about future-yuanon, but i'll make an exception this time

>>81544138
>luckily
i suppose it takes some time until your brain adapts to not consuming it.

>as long as I think to remember the dream right after waking up
then the dream wasn't important enough to be remembered anyway.

>it's good then you decided on mostly resting today
yeah. i just did some chores and prepared everything. even finished my card-collection in time. now i just need to clean tomorrow and then i'm ready for my vacation. :>

helloooo every1 :p
sorry for not posting yesterday much TwT
how is everyone?

>>81545313
>dream wasn't important enough
yep
as long as I got through the night it's all that matters
>even finished my card-collection
wow perfect timing!
>just need to clean tomorrow
hope there's not much
>then i'm ready for my vacation. :>
are you going to fly there?
have you ever been on a plane?

>>81545364
oh hey hey :3
how's it goin?
>how is everyone?
today I don't do anything, just chilled

>>81545364
hi meowster!

>sorry for not posting yesterday much TwT
that's ok. the more important queation is: did you end up stretching yesterday? >.>

>how is everyone?
i'm alright, but i'm tired and it's way too hot again. are you ok?

>>81545449
>as long as I got through the night it's all that matters
story of my life ^^

>wow perfect timing!
i might have redirected some extra resources to get it done. can really clean with those cards littered around everywhere anyway, so it had to be done today. i'm just glad i'm finally through with this. took me long enough.

>hope there's not much
there's a lot of dust, but that's about it.

>are you going to fly there? have you ever been on a plane?
no. it's a family trip and we'll go there by car, but i have been on a plane before. when i was a child my family went on vacation to gran canaria, but that was a long time ago. over 20 years at this point, so i don't remember much about it. have you?

>>81545744
>story of my life ^^
at least that means you've been getting through the nighs :>
>took me long enough.
I'd say short enough
you're fast
>there's a lot of dust
yeah but also when you come back there's also gonna be dust
so is it worth it even?
>family trip and we'll go there by car, but i have been on a plane before
oooh, is it a big car? because if not you'll get the plane experience of being cramped anyway
I have never ever been on a plane, but I'm not scared of flying, I'd probably find it boring desu heh
maybe one day I'll fly someone but it's expensive

>>81544138
>that sounds bad anon
>why did you do it again?
just angry at myself

>>81545041
>very little energy as well I'm not sure why
yea it's very strange, hopefully we have more tomorrow I guess.
>something to do while my phone was charging
definitely better then just sitting around waiting.
>who knows maybe I'll even find another kitty to pet
Ooo yea hopefully you find a very cute kitty :3

>>81545313
>everything took a bit longer than expected today
oh that's a shame, at least you did it early so wasn't that big of a deal.
>don't forget stuff like my charging cable or earbuds tomorrow.
oh yea those would pretty suck to forget.
>future-yuanon, but i'll make an exception this time
smart then hehe. you want your future self to be just as happy.

>>81545364
hey meowster!! hope your all well today.
I'm just got done playing with a amazing friend.

>>81536922
hi yu
How was your laundry day?
>worse enough :[
I got to spend half the day in maintenance. It was hotter. But I got a bunch of copper I can scrap!
>>81545364
hi meowster
>sorry for not posting yesterday
it okay. I never post that much
>how is everyone?
okay. just trying grind out these next two months.
>>81546190
hi cat,
>I'd probably find it boring desu heh
maybe one day I'll fly someone but it's expensive
eh, Last long flight I had, I played portal 2 on a laptop. You can keep yourself busy.

>>81546190
>at least that means you've been getting through the nighs :>
i guess i have been and will be for a while. :>

>I'd say short enough you're fast
heh. maybe, but it felt like an eternity. now i need to think about what kind of decks i want to build and play. i have some in mind, but that's something for another day.

>but also when you come back there's also gonna be dust so is it worth it even?
hm. a very philosophical question for such a late hour, but it does make me feel better when i do it and it will be a nice finale to the vacation-preparations, so i'm inclined to say it is worth it.

>is it a big car?
reasonably big, but we made the trip with smaller cars, more people and more luggage before. shouldn't be much of an issue. depends on the traffic too, of course.

>if not you'll get the plane experience of being cramped anyway
don't worry. i'm used to it. long rides are quite uncomfy no matter how much space i have anyway.

>I have never ever been on a plane, but I'm not scared of flying, I'd probably find it boring desu heh
yeah, i mean: what's the point in worrying when your already on? you'll come back down one way or the other anyway. and for a lot of people it's no different than riding the bus or train.

>maybe one day I'll fly someone but it's expensive
depends on how nice of an experience you want, but i'd argue that it's worth it to fly with one of the nicer airlines. i've always said that we should bring back zeppelins for classy cruise-like traveling

>>81546236
hey, dude. wanna talk about why?

>>81546424
>at least you did it early so wasn't that big of a deal.
true. the combination of bad sleep and heat really got to me today, though. really tired and still have to make my bed. (~.~)

>those would pretty suck to forget.
it would big time. i should put them somewhere where i just can't miss them.

>you want your future self to be just as happy.
guy deserves a break as well. ;D

>>81546483
hi cynic (^-^)

>How was your laundry day?
it went well. as far as i can tell everthing's done and i'm well prepared to leave tomorrow. not sure how often i'll stop by here, though.

>I got to spend half the day in maintenance. It was hotter. But I got a bunch of copper I can scrap!
that's cool. what will you do with it? and how will you spend the rest of your day?

>>81541509
>i do understand wanting that, I don't think you need someone who does self harm to support them and for them to support you tho.
Right, but I'd want someone with whom I can identify, and can identify with me. I'm afraid I would otherwise be judged, or come across as off-putting.

I'm too afraid of being judged all the time; right now I'm afraid people thought I was fetishizing this, which is completely wrong, and I think this is a horrible thing to fetishize. I just don't know anyone in my small world who, as far as I know, has this problem.

>>81546605
>bad sleep and heat really got to me today,
oh truly the worst combo ever :/. nothing worse then that.
>tired and still have to make my bed. (~.~)
oh that does really suck then :/. I thankfully make mine in the morning.
>put them somewhere where i just can't miss them.
true that would be smart. could even write it down somewhere.
>guy deserves a break as well. ;D
very true yea hehe.

>>81546749
that's fair, someone that does self harm will never judge, but maybe you could hide them or something and when whoever gets to actually know you and like you, that you used to self harm won't be a deal breaker at that point.

most people who fetishize it don't do it themselves, and most people when they see scars or someone talking about it, don't usually think of it as sexual in any way.

i go sleep
goodnight friend

>>81546954
>nothing worse then that.
it's up there, that's for sure.

>I thankfully make mine in the morning.
i'm way to lazy for that, but also washed the sheets, so i had to put on new ones.

>could even write it down somewhere.
but then i also have to remember where i put the note...

>>81546976
good night! see you tomorrow!

i'll call it a day as well. as always: thanks for the nice thread and sorry for being slow today. good night!

>>81546976
sleep well.

>>81547428
>, but also washed the sheets, so i had to put on new ones.
good you watched them. and makes sense then.
>also have to remember where i put the note...
true that would suck to forget hehe.
goodnight yuanon.

goodnight bump. feeling quite lonely/alone. at least I have my cat. he truly is amazing