Organic cream edition

STUFF THE POLICE

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL it seasideMARK LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

Helperlad's hit song after winning X-factor, "It's Nappy Time!"

>Road goes to shit right at the county boundary

Wonder what Ruth is gonna be getting up to tonight. A few pints maybe?

OFCOM CAN TAKE MY /BRITFEEL/ FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS

The regular Friday night alone posting on 4chan like the winner you are is it, king?

all my friends have abandoned me, just for having an opinion.

And on the other side

>>81874597
What's that opinion de lad? LARP incoming

>>81874571
>>81874600
many such cases desu desu

>>81874585
Yes lid

How can I guilt someone without being obvious about it?

Got one of them travel bag wallet doohickeys that you put over your neck me lids.

>>81874629
mong lmao
you don't need one unless you're in south africa or something

>>81874640
Why not? Handy for me wallet, passport and phone if I don't have zipped pockets.

Might get an Adidas bum bag lads. Really gotten into Adidas recently, and trackies in general. Are north face worth it or a meme?

>>81874654
suppose that's alright then thought you were being overly cautious of thieves

>>81874571
>Road goes to shit right at the county boundary
>>81874600
>And on the other side
I bet you're popular at parties.

>>81874597
You must conform to social norms to have friends delid so work on hiding your power level better and don't speak your mind on sensitive topics like a socially retarded autist.

>>81874665
Nah, just more to have safe place to store stuff because a lot of my pants and shorts don't have zips.

>>81874690
>a lot of my pants and shorts don't have zips.
Bit freaky

Is going to the pub the cure to incel/robotdom?

>>81874701
Kek, you knew what I meant. Corrr, imagine getting your wollocks caught on that zip.

>>81874585
Correct! I was out for 3 hours earlier that's enough of the real world for one day tbqh. Entire weekend of doing nothing and its lush

>>81874712
laffing my fucking arse off at this screenie

>>81874712
Most of the owl fellas who sit in the pub daily are robots themselves.

>>81874712
Well yeah.
Some fat drunk slag while ride any pole on offer.

>>81874712
If you're ugly you'll just become one of those sad cunts that sits in the pub every night or is on the fruit machines.

>>81874712
Poleys dad discovered that a haircut was the cure to gender dysphoria

My mates gone on that estrogen

What animal you lids reincarnating as?

>>81874762
Hes dad was based af shame he moved back to pakistan

>>81874810
Shaw's jird

To the lad asking me if Ive seen the whale. Sadly not. I hear it was a very good film though.

oh my god lads its so fucking warm idk whats up with me, its only 20 degrees, when it was 35 I was fine, tihnk the humidities fucked.

ive had to strip off after tesco down to me bollocks, lots come off, beads of sweat on my forehead, grim.

God FUCKING damnit the maccies near me hasn't had milkshake in a WEEK!! what the fuck is the point without the milkshake?!

>>81874810
seal me lad, love seals, fkn well cute and comfy, i should probably pick an apex predator tho so I dont get mauled, maybe a killer whale

>>81874898
If that was me I would turn the place upside down. Go in with a claw hammer and ask for a milkshake and I bet they would make you one on the spot.
I remember seeing a video where some lad went into a McDonalds and asked for a McFlurry and the mong behind the counter said "no the machine is broke" and the lad just walked through and made one and it wasnt broke the fat slut lied because she couldnt be bothered to make one.

>>81874701
Sorry mate I only wear these.

why do maccies all over do the milkshake thing? why cant they be arsed to do it? they dont even do it the machine literally makes the milkshake, I dont frequent the place so I dont know but I dont get it

>>81874923
>Go in with a claw hammer
Fucking kek'd at the image of that

>>81874774
Sit down and talk to your friend and convince him not to troon out before he takes those life altering drugs because of a fetish and a crippling porn addiction.

>>81874861
you stinky.. yuck

>>81874661
One time in highschool some lad had one before they was fashionable and some other lad in the changing room said "puff pouch" he was fucking fuming because I think he was a closeted fag but tried to act tough. He was like WHO SAID THAT. Funny, always reminds me of it whenever you see men wearing them. Handbags for men is what they are.

>>81874923
There is another one but it's not as close, if I'm gonna get fucked in Uber deliver fees I don't want my food to be cold by the time it gets here

>>81874932
Requesting that apu lad to make an AI image of bigB fuming in McDonalds with a claw hammer shouting at McDonald's staff over a milkshake please.

Nice chippy that was. Cheesy gravy chips and a 5oz beef burger. Oh aye. Shits coming in strong later I reckon.

>>81874976
Lamb chops and chips tonight at B towers. It lush.

>>81874958
I agree as it happens, you'd have gotten the fuck kicked out of you for having one when I was in high school

Nice little 11k hike if that's alright with you de lads

>>81874981
Oh lush. Love lamb but only if it's cooked right. Dad made it for me once and he fucked it up because it was rank.

>>81875015
that weight will be melting right off

Does Ebin drink alcohol?

Does Ebin eat meat?

>>81875051
I've heard he's partial to the odd daiquiri

What sort of parents name their child "Ebin", fucking says it all doesn't it

can boys be witches?

Might shag Eva

>>81875105
Might stop her being such a whingey twat

>>81875099
>Tittilandus
Corr

Might let Ebin shag me

>>81875135
Fake trip, although obvious from context

You think the lasses will like it when I show them my music collection?

>>81875135
He's asexual silly

>>81875158
cant get laid =/= asexual

>30 minutes cardio daily
>calorie deficit
yeah day five of the cut is fooking happening you silly slags

now for Star Trek x

>>81875200
Loves his Star Trek he does

>>81875210
have I mentioned im watching it

im 4 times watching it x

Might go to town on my Fleshlight

>>81875015
why did didn't just buy a garmin gps watch instead of carrying that monstrosity around with you

>>81875256
We all Geowizard in life x

want a girls fanny in my face ASAP x

what is the rapiest thing you've ever done?

me? kissed a girl while drunk. she WASN'T asking for it.

You just can't beat a double cheeseburger and large fries can you really lads
>>81875298
Literally never going to happen

Might go down on my Fleshlight

>The Apu found the Fleshlight Vault.

just going to post this again!

I need a FANNEH in me face pronto buddy

>you know what will get a girl to sit on my face?
>posting about it repeatedly in /britfeel/!
>could never fail, this

Stacey if you reading this drop your panties and put that vagina on me nose area maybe let out a little fart too wont go amiss x

>he thinks people posting their fantasies is their way of achieving it
It's a feels general, not serious

>>81875135
Isn't Ebin a massive faggot?

>>81875378
Got mine hidden very secret place you'll never find it mate

THERE IS NO GIRLFRIEND ABOARD THE ENTERPRISE

dammit!

what would a /britfeel/ thread trip to the holodeck look like?

our Tiananmen square x

want a bussy in my face ASAP x

>>81875439
it would be a mix of deviant sexual fantasies and then proper grim ones like a girl saying I love you and cuddling you watching your favourite show

I once paid an escort 180 quid to watch evil dead 2 with me and cuddle me on the sofa


grim innit

>>81875448
snorting and howling

>>81875457
you at least fucked her, right?

If I was to die tomorrow, I would be okay with it. I've lived life to the fullest. I might not be rich or have 20 girlfiends in my life or have impressed people with my personality. But I am content now.

>>81875439
https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/1k0hzpz/computer_generate/

Literally this.

>>81875496
You're a valued member of this board x

>>81875479
No she just kissed my head and let me the little spoon and kind of treated me like her good boy. she made me get changed into my Batman pajamas I brought round and then cuddled into her as we watched ED 2 it was all ive ever wanted. I cried driving home afterwards and wanted to crash the car but obviously kept on living like.

we all want to feel loved for who we are in life x

>>81875457
I assume you did more than just fucking cuddle mate cmon

>>81875509
nah just cuddled and kissed a little and watched the film it was lovely and I look fondly back on it. she was an escort i mainly saw for a few years from 18 to 20.

>>81875508
God I hope this is a shitpost.

>>81875496
I've had some cracking times on World of Warcraft and other vidya. I lived long enough to watch the entirety of Lost and The Leftovers.

That's about as well as I could expect

>>81875496
we are but drops of water in the running river de lid. glad you are alive now and I hope you stay content and peaceful <3

>>81874661
North face is decent, i have a 10 year old windbreaker and only now are the signs of wear and tear really starting to show

>>81875496
Same. Often think about suicide it never leaves me. But I have to carry on for the sake of my mother. Sometimes I wish I could leave and throw it all away but the guilt is whats keeping my alive. I cannot wait to be free.

>>81875554
If my parents weren't about I'm not sure I'd be about.
All the relatives I give a shit about hurting are gone except them.

>>81875508
>she made me get changed into my Batman pajamas

>>81875508
Lot of people go for the GF experience. This is the mom/son experience.

>>81875579
yes yes this is true de lid just want a mum to love me the right way

>>81875599
I like to think you are larping footmong but you come across like a right damaged freak

>>81875509
fucking hell, though i was weird for wanting to see an escort to pretend to be my step mom like in the porn you see, this guy dressing in fucking batman pants

im HHL pilled now
fuck to lot!

obsessed with violence and death, me.

I bet even helper Doesn't have Batman pyjamas

>>81875639
fuck the lot of them indeed lad

>>81875657
its every cunt for himself in this life. womfort is something you make by yourself for yourself, end of

Says a lot when literally at my work got invited to a social tomorrow night but they "forgot" to send me the email. Honestly fuck it all.

>>81875644
>obsessed with violence and death, me.
in fiction...r right?

yes i am obsessed
obsessed with death

>>81875639
>im HHL pilled now
So you've become mentally retarded and useless?

>>81875686
>told my work I didn't want to go to a social
>2 people separately demanded I go
Hurts the other way around too m8

>>81875686
they tried the same with me a few years back, said they sent m e to the wrong pub m=by "mistake". then why was i the only one? and they had my phone number! cunts cunts cunts

>>81875691
no, in real life.

it haunts me, i really wish it wasn't happening, i guess it's like OCD? ;__;

>>81875712
sean knows the score hes not wasting his life running in circles for any "employers"
cunts

>>81875734
i run circles and get thrice the dosh of bennies, cant complain

>>81875750
doing stuff you dont like for things you dont need.
might be for you but its not for me

Lads Im getting a bit paranoid about spending my bennies again, you can spend it on what you want right? I mean every other cunt is right? Do jobcentre mongs jump down your throat when they find out you've been spending hundreds of pounds on video games?

>>81875772
None of their fucking business. As long as you don't have undeclared income, or go over your savings limits, they don't care

but it's not even as good, they don't even have porno here and they can and they're allowed to post the porno >.<

>>81875768
>for things you dont need
I need food, drink, and tech mate

>>81875772
hhl buys cocaine with his

>>81875734
>>81875750
>in circles
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q989I1sIwC4

i went to a barbeque it was very fun i played poker with my friend and blackjack but she is better than me
she also asked me about my iron cross
i had a lot to drink and i was sleepy on the sofa

>>81875772
>again
what you mean again?

>>81875791
sean has that and dosnt work

>>81875800
you write like a child

>ooooowwhhhh dwp mummy please dont audit my bank accounts owwwehhhh

lmao scared little fags x

>>81875800
>she is better than me
true, but how's her blackjack game?

>>81875812
Hmmmm could it be a deliberate affectation of pretending to be coy and quirky to sucker in some of you naive lot to give them attention? Nah, couldn't be.

>>81875824
slightly concerned they'll think those crypto trades are some kind of capital or investment.

>>81875842
you give women far too much credit

>>81875842
are you miffed because Zelda is going to be played by a girl?

>>81875832
i anm good at blackjack but i lost to her
i ate a hotdog and a lamb kofta and crisps and 1 berry cider and one apple cider and lemon soda

>>81875858
have you regressed again?

>>81875858
alright there eva?

>>81875856
>Zelda is going to be played by a girl?
i dont think zelda is who you think she is

>>81875853
Naive hands typed this post.
>>81875856
I don't care about video game films, the concept is inherently bad. I do think the Hunter Schaffer meme was funny though.

>>81875803
Not sure lad I have been paranoid about it a few times in the past. I suffer from extreme paranoia, its probably unmedicated ADHD constantly swirling the thoughts around in my brain. I feel guilty about making purchases sometimes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vW6K-95ozOk
i am super slumped in my chair

>>81875800
that's great!! well done, good job!! sociable eva!!
>>81875858
you ate lots too!!

>>81875893
maybe i am naive but honestly i cant be botherd to care about women

Fucking shite how you cant take screenshots on Netflix even on desktop you cant. So I have to take a photo of the screen like some silent generation boomer to shitpost about Star Trek. Not right!

>>81875887
i meant EXACTLY what i said.

The government spent nearly a third less on hotels to house asylum seekers between April 2024 and March 2025, according to newly published figures.

The Home Offices annual accounts, external show
2.1bn was spent on hotel accommodation - an average of about 5.77m per day, down from 3bn or 8.3m per day, the previous year.

>>81875925
why not pipe the framebuffer to a file? they can't stop you piping the framebuffer to a file. that would be like controlling your eyes.

>>81875925
use a screen recorder init

>>81875905
s a d b o y s
see me in the club with it tatted on my chest x

>>81875925
put snipping tool on the 1-3 second timer
that is how i screenshot on snapchat

>>81875930
Hunter Schafer is in the top 0.00000001 of trannies. Wouldn't mind having a go.

>>81875932
>The government spent nearly a third less on hotels to house asylum seekers between April 2024 and March 2025, according to newly published figures.
>The Home Offices annual accounts, external show
>2.1bn was spent on hotel accommodation - an average of about 5.77m per day, down from 3bn or 8.3m per day, the previous year.
fascinating

im so fucking bored lads its not right

>>81875930
absolute unit la

>>81875925
just pirate it, the webdl will be exactly the same as what you stream from netflix

humans were not meant to be in boxrooms on computers reading forums all day
its not right

star trek deserves bluray remix though desu

>soda
didn't even clock this. too deep into my Smallville marathon to know what's American any more.

only really care about Lex scenes. she-Xander and the gang can fuck right off at this point.

>>81875980
u mena REMUX lad?

>>81875993
oh, yes, not a big deal, i don't get pissy over spelling mistakes and neither should you

>>81875930
in a proper world this would have been in the varangian guard

my trip to the holodeck would be the scene of helpers boxroom as he comes back drunk and smashes up his coffee table
id give him a good talking to about his behaviours

>>81875961
spamkiddo get a life outside this thrad

can we just get loads of posts going rn

FUCK this bloke. posho farmer twat thinks he's the salt of the earth. don't care how much your heckin wholesome farm is struggling mate, you're the WORST moral compass

Shower then beddenburgh... Home.

>>81876050
Is he on that Star Trek programme mate?

>>81875980
Make it so!

He's watching one of them Star Trek programmes on the telly I reckon

10000 Geordies in Glasgow tomorrow
hope Crissy goes for a pint with them

>>81876067
Me too, big day tomorrow for me

>>81876088
Double make it so!

not seen crossy since the eva situation

why doesn't Link the Elf wear his green hat any more? did J. M. Barrie's estate complain?

>>81876099
Oh yeah? Why's that my lid.

>>81876081
nah lad Smallville, just throwing a tantrum about my programmes.

None of the friends I have made in my 39 years of life I was able to keep and I don't know why

>>81876118
You might have TMAU

>>81876104
bit worried.

HelperLad, ask crosslad on PSN when he'll be back. he did this for you.

>>81876116
Is that one of them programmes on telly?
Have they got it on there in 4k?

made me mind up seeing the dominatrix next weekend just an hour tho quick bit of punishment and strap on fucking get put in me place lmao x

>>81876210
im on that nofap trying to get over my femdom problems

Based grandma lads

>>81876216
good luck de leeeeeeed x

>>81876223
day 9 for me tomoz mate
my bollocks was radiating earlier though

Went full-scale Welper mode and went down t' chippy for some warlic and chippy wippies. Garn watch a new wepisode of Rick and Morty nows. Life's better when you're not doing your wollocks in.

>>81876245
oi, >>81876128
do some good in your life

>>81876216
Superpowers start soon lad

>>81876245
stomach cancer coming on strong and fatty liver disease or throat cancer or you know alcohol induced dementia uhmmmm yeah you are one grim individual lmao

Fast food and alcohol every night, then garn onto incel forums to post about hitler, wake up and complain about feeling rough and repeat the same routines x

Had a walk to the slots after gym, got some decent wins. Ended up ~140 quid up.

Bought 10 quids worth of Euromillions with it in the shop, a girl who looked at least a decade younger than me ID'D me for it.

>>81876300
yeah but dont forget he also is 39 and never shagged lmao

Real loser hours now. You do NOT want to be one of the posters in /britfeel/ at this hour on a Friday.

>>81876321
Howling at this I am

>>81876300
rinse and repeat until the inevitable cocaine and alcohol induced heart attack that puts an end to his pathetic, worthless existence
it lush x

I phoned 111 earlier and they recommended I go to urgent care but I'll just wait until my GP opens on Monday morning. Seethie weethers will love this but I reckon my binge drinking has finally caught up with me. Keeping sober from now on.

>>81876309
>10 quid on euromillions
Corrr. You know how they say you pay for the fantasy of what you would do with the money. I don't even get that thrill anymore. I don't think having millions would actually fix me at all, and I think the same can be said for most. There's no chemical solution to a spiritual problem.

>>81876340
I'm here and I'm not a loser. Kinda. Depends.

>>81876349
Do the Hitler routine again lad x

>>81876349
>phoned 111 earlier
Why, lid

>>81876372
He smashed up his glass coffee table in a violent rage last night after Steve dumped him

>>81876309
>Had a walk

eva is a good girl for socialising with friends irl!!

>>81876349
You'll be drinking tomorrow night whether you want to or not you mong

>>81876393
creepy bastard

>>81876349
Sean I mean this with upmost sincerity

I pray it is serious and the rest of your sad pitiful pathetic life is spent in pain and alone.

Cheers x

>>81876372

I don't wanna say because the twolls will make fun of me but it's pretty serious. It involves bleeding.

He's gone and sliced his hands up when he smashed that glass coffee table the silly bastard

>>81876410
Probably just piles de lad but good to check in with the GP. If it's in your piss then that'll be a kidney stone. Not fatal by any means but you don't want one

Tried for an hour to wank tonight but didn't come to completion, haven't wanked for 3 days too.

>>81876358
I pay because i'm confident I'll win, it fate.

>>81876388
did 30 min incline walk on the treadmill before that too.

>>81876410
Pishing blood?

>>81876393
Weird little gimp I can feel the sex pest through the screen

Steve's throbbing cock piercing Sean's sphincter

>>81876434
>did 30 min incline walk on the treadmill before that too.

I did a 29:32 incline walk too as it happens
>>81873640

hope you're pleased with yourself, manifesting-stomach-cancer anon.

Title: Sean and the Smoke Screen

Sean was forty angry and alone. He lived in his mothers council flat with the curtains always drawn and the TV stuck on angry men shouting about lost greatness. Online he called himself BritProud88 and spent his days posting venom between microwave meals and half hearted trips to the jobcentre.

He had never worked. Never wanted to. Why should I slave for peanuts he would mutter when immigrants are handed homes and benefits just for turning up. It never mattered that none of it was true. In Seans world facts were optional and outrage was everything.

He had never had a girlfriend either. That too was someone elses fault. Western women are brainwashed he would say. They go for thugs and foreigners. It never crossed his mind that it might be the stained hoodie the hollow eyes or the bitter smell of disappointment that pushed people away.

Then came the cough. At first he ignored it. Probably just the damp. But then there was blood. A reluctant trip to the GP led to tests and then scans and then the news. Advanced lung cancer.

He sat on the edge of his bed stunned as the nurse spoke softly about options. All Sean could say was Must be the fumes from that new Halal chicken place down the road.

As the tumour grew so did his hatred. NHS is too busy treating foreigners he said to his mother. No wonder I waited two hours for chemo.

He never noticed the irony. His oncologist was from Pakistan the nurse from Romania the cleaner from Nigeria. They cared for him gently without flinching at his words.

His mother cried alone in the kitchen most days. Sean did not see. He was too busy blaming the world for a life he never built and a body that was falling apart.

Near the end a hospice volunteer came to sit with him. Young quiet Algerian roots. Sean looked at him pale and gasping.

You do not have to be here Sean said.

I know said the volunteer. But someone should be.

And for the first time in years Sean had nothing to say.

>>81876434
Reddit captions do it for me. It's not so much the visual content, but the psyhcological aspect

>>81876463
The absolute, and I mean absolute state of this post

>>81876463
When people call you a normie, and you claim otherwise, posts like this is why you're right

HHL will now have a right cheese mealty thanks to footmongs story lol

Howling at that oh my fking days

The drivel compass lifting up slowly and ending up pointing firmly to glasgow, like a semi that has gradually transformed in a rock hard erection

Eva, let me shag you, lass

is it forgotten tomb or forgotten tome

>Must be the fumes from that new Halal chicken place down the road.

>NHS is too busy treating foreigners he said to his mother.
Can't stop laffing

>>81876463
>As the tumour grew so did his hatred
you got this line from a truman show video I posted recently

>0:23
https://youtu.be/T_MVf6_1pYg?feature=shared&t=23

just treated myself to a massive pint of Pepsi because i feel sad

>>81876463
I accept a bit of creative licence here but it's been ruined with too much politics

>>81876545
Love a Pepsi Cherry, me.

Kino postington I hafta say
Lmfao

>>81875721
lowkey same, might have been the fact that as a youngun I had unrestricted internet access and spent a decent wedge of time looking at bestgore, bit grim really. Dont look at that stuff anymore but the interest is still there.

HHL gone quiet

shame cause he posted all that racist mentally unwell shite the other night his true colours are that of a angry pathetic virgin chancer. long overdue a good fucking kicking

You're welcome to those 4 (you)s btw, all mine

>>81876583
He's been posting the Hitler shite for years now
Got no sympathy for him

>>81876358
> I don't think having millions would actually fix me at all,
Same. I'd move abroad to somewhere that doesn't speak very good English, buy an apartment or something in a big city and just rot until death. Maybe pay people to suck my willy as well. Won't make me happy though, but it'll make me slightly less miserable.

You lads realise Helper is trolling about the bleeding, right?

>>81876583
no one here cares about racism you weirdo

HHL is a good person, not even saying I like him because thats subjective but he's never harmed anyone, always ready to do a good deed

Year into sobriety and I almost relapsed again. The cravings never stop unfortunately

Might contact Sunderland homes to check on him, seems appropriate I think they need to get involved

>>81876599
Yeah. Would definitely help. But you can be the richest man in town, and so what. Can't buy away the fact that you were born into a dying civilisation. Can't pay to have spiritual enlightenment. Corrr.

>stripped of his free handouts
>kicked out the failure of a supported living accommodation
>on the streets homeless and smoking street crack

it welpers world x

but where is are delicate flower wee princess

The royal family drove him to suicide, it's not his fault x

everyone out on the piss tonight

dont forget he pulls the strings lad
he got cushty life he use britfeel as entertainment
he Wikipedia king
he never worked and never will
you pay for his kebabs and cushty life

>>81874585
Our last Friday together, innit?

>>81876599
>I'd move abroad

Meh no where abroad is any better, this country isn't too bad if your rich. There is some nice rural towns left.

>>81876663
try thailand

Just applied for Argos credit lads. New TVs on tap it lush. Credit card maxxing like our seasideMARK. Wow. What an experience. Got to wait 10 days though! I want it right now right now right fooking NOW!

love britfeel me
love thread culture
love inside jokes
fuckig howling

>>81876673
future cash injections on Argos for free
get in there

>>81876671
>try thailand

Shithole full of corrupt police, drugged up deanos and old creepy sex-tourists. Probably some awful weather and unsanitary things there too.

>potential gig fren did end up replying
>we have agreed to both look out for gigs

will I finally make a friend? stay tuned (probably not)

go to our notification settings to unsubscribe from this blog

>>81876663
ASK NOW QUESTION TELL NO LIIIIEEEEEES
ASK NOW QUESTION TELL NO LIEEEES

>>81876690
alright giglad

>>81876688
The women are brown, ugly and have the most annoying accents in the world too.

Elephants are nice though

>>81876688
I bet the cost of living there is dirt cheap.

speaking of thai bints, gonna watch that louis theroux doc on thai brides

>>81875508
If I had the money, I'd probably do the same.

Wonder what happened to that graduate job guy. Or was this just another larp character.

>>81876673
Corrrrrrr! What telly did you go for me lid?

Giving meself health anxiety reading all these scary posts and videos about the symptoms. Nothing I can do about it right now anyway and I'm not garn to urgent care as it will be full of pissheads and smackheads kicking off on a weekend. I'll just try and put it out of my mind for now.

>full of pissheads and smackheads kicking off on a weekend
you'll fit right in then pal

>>81876703
elo lid, hows your week been?

>>81876722
what's wrong with you King Bee?

>>81876708
It's irrelevant if your a lottery winning millionaire, unless you won under 5 million then it's a good shout

>>81876719
Not sure. Might get a 55 inch QLED or the 48 inch OLED. Not too keen on the OLED burn in bollocks so I might go with the QLED LG one. Its only 50 pounds a month

>>81876722
Coooor fuck off and be six feet de lid x
>>81876463

>>81876717
Do you think you could make me cum? Given I can't make myself cum.

Thai food is beyond revolting. If I even went there for a day I'd need some westernised supermarket to survive

>>81876747
I got the 48 inch B4 about a month back and I couldn't be happier with it mate. Best telly I've ever owned. Burn in is overblown now, LG have done a lot to mitigate it since the early days.

>>81876614
sorry to hear that lad. you're living the sober life, but it's the other things/underlying causes that are left.
i used to have DREAMS about relapsing, thanks brain.

>>81876722
You a young lad in life, it probably nothing x

sleep well shitfeel it weekend x

>>81876722
will your bennies cover the bills?
the NHS is meant to be there for people who need it.

>>81876796
>young man
39 years old hahahahah omds senpai

>>81876722
long painful for you my lid should have eaten some veggies hahahahah

>>81876797
Corrrr... who is the owner of them inflated sandbags?

>>81876764
I don't think there is a way to answer this question in the affirmative or negative without demeaning myself.

>>81876810
Weird little gimmick you've been pushing for years

>>81874531 (OP)
>get home from work
>'ad a wank
>start chatting up a Vietnamese uni brass
>order a doner kebab, EXTRA red cabbage and garlic sauce

getttuppp lads

>Double Chin completely gone now

>>81876854
Salad on a fuckin kebab? You avin a fuckin laugh mate? Chuck that shite on the floor right now.

>>81876722
why you larping about being sick de lid you desperate for attention

Vegetables are for women and poofs. Simple as.

Nappy posting will commence at 11pm sharp.

>>81876844
Hard one isn't it, unlike my cock which is fully flaccid

Ponce has exhausted his drivel ration for the 18th of july

>>81876913
Why 11 are you going for a poo?

>>81876931
Just a nice rounded off time gives time for people to prepare their best posts

>>81876917
Lmfao. Iktf my lid. They do pills for that thoughever.

I really have come to admire Kung Fu films in a big way. Can't believe I ignored them for years. Hong Kong films in general are brilliant.

>>81876973
Love some of the early Jet Li ones myself

I'm drinking tinnies tonight

>>81876986
Have barely touched Jet Li films other than Once Upon a Time in China. What are your favourites?

>>81877006
Fearless is pretty neat.

>>81876945
I can get hard if I go at it, but I couldn't cum or really find anything sexually stimulating. I could look at a pretty and know I should become horny but the horniness just doesn't come.

Ebin's life will really take off after his 32nd birthday. By the time he's 33 he'll no longer be posting on 4chan

>>81877004
Cider for me lad can't have a summer Friday night without one or 6

>>81877017
I'll have to buy a few more when I'm back from America or buy some in America, think they have some Jet Li sets over there. I heard The One is good too.

>>81876973
I think channel 5 used to play a bunch of those chinese historical martial arts movies, and I really liked them but sadly I don't remember any of the names

>>81877027
And by 34 he'll be married with a sprog on the way

I'm stuck in this body but not forever

>>81877054
Used to be some kino on the terrestrial channels late at night then at some point it degenerated into live casino games.

>>81877063
>with a sprog on the way

This is some serious fucking kino.
https://youtu.be/v9mYsKvkLpI?si=qsZznEAsII6IHW0q

>>81874576
She's gonna be drinking a lot and getting stamps for her ale trail card.

>>81877104
She seems like a fun lass tbqh, Ruthmong needs to get a grip and leave her alone. She's probably fearing for her life.

>>81876973
based fellow wong kong enjoyer

More of a Donkey Kong man myself.

>>81877174
absolutely loving the new game me

>>81877115
She's a good lass. She's done a lot of things for the local community. York is definitely better than your area.

Ebin will have sex with Chika by the end of the year

>>81877190
Fuck off Ruthmong you bloody creep.
>>81877188
It looks fun, going to have to secure a Switch 2 down the line. Any Funky Kong appearances yet me lid?

>>81877200
No Funky just yet but I'm still not too far in so he might show up. Taking my time with this one as there's so much to do and explore each level.

>>81877207
Enjoy it looks like a DK Mario Odyssey style game. Maybe you'll be blessed with a Cranky Kong appearance too, corrrr.

>>81877228
Careful, you know Steve has a phobia of blood. That's why his favourite show is Doc Martin.

What's York like lads?

>>81877240
What if I told you I posted this on the wrong board and I was role replaying as HHL somewhere else. That's why I deleted the post

>>81877253
Kek, for what purpose? Just to see how they react?

>>81877250
Went a few times as a kid, can't remember much, a viking boat in a shopping centre

Need Crossy's opinion on Aya Matsuura but he's been AWOL.

>>81877257
Haha yes. I was on /pol/ and was shitposting in a Brit thread.

>>81877253
don't worry lad. HHL himself is actually a character from another website, i just type YOUR responses there, and copy HIS responses here.

blokes actually playing online dollies at 11 pm on a Friday night now thats funny

Little Sean filling up his little nappy big poos on tap it lovely

>>81877188
does it have that fine piece of monkey ass wixie wong in it?

Can't believe Diddy Kong turned out to be a Diddler Kong. He was caught live on King K. Rool's nonce hunting channel.

Feel a bit unwell and tired so garn have an early night. Hopefully I'll feel better after a few days off the wooze.

>>81877323
see you in't morning pal

Running to Tesco express to get my Huggies in for the night. Might get a few webab wrap on the way back I hope Steve isn't in the mood for a bum I'm a little tired out from last nights session.

>>81877200
It's clear you live in a shit area with no culture or history.

>>81877323
You really need to quit the booze mate. Hope you were trolling about bleeding earlier. We can't have our chairman keeling over on us. Time for the Infinite Wuppagrind Era.

>>81877264
Maybe you should've gone to the railway museum.

>>81877333
>IBumad

Milk with a bit of salt and sugar. Last few drops. Tastes familiar. Hmmm. Hmmm indeed.

Noticed someone on the bus earlier who just seemed like he was straight out of 2003 or something. Hard to explain but he just felt of a different era. Was weird. Like when you watch those video of a convenience store in America in 1985 or something. Just a totally different type of person that no longer exists. But he was just there on the bus.

>>81877347
It was with my parents window shopping, they didn't care about shit like that

In that beddingtons now with that fan on.

>>81877339

Defo not trolling lid. I'm honestly thinking about just going teetotal for a while. The wooze is now costing me my health and that's where I draw the line.

>>81877361
Bit of a personal question but do you enjoy swallowing your boyfriend's cum or spit it out?

>>81877317
not rite what he do to baby kong

>>81877400
Don't need to stop completely if you don't want to, but make sure to have a multiple day break in between, that's what's important. Going teetotal might actually do you more bad than good at this stage.

>>81877400
It's time for a return to this. You know what I mean

>>81877407
Baby Kong grew up to be Cranky Kong and now we know why.

>>81877401
Nobody spits it out. It's always been a stupid question.

>>81877428
had a bird spit it at me once

>>81877421
more like wanky kong cos he wanks to the memories of him being widdled

>>81877400
>The wooze is now costing me my health and that's where I draw the line.
oh yeah you've always given a shit about that you daft cunt go down garage for a bottle of whiskey you melt

>>81877435
Corrrr. If you like that kind of thing that is.

>>81877441
He called Lanky Kong 'cause he got a 10 inch Cranky Dong.

>>81877435
Actually have a fantasy of cumming in a lassies mouth and then kissing her and cum swapping.

She's not looking good lately. Must be the heat affecting her.

>>81877415

The return of the womfy era and end of the collapse era coming on strong x

>>81877472
Kek, she looks even more like Mark now. That toucan dosser nose is a curse.
>>81877480
Womfy always better than melty.

Never been to York.
Never been to Falkirk.
Never been to Preston.

>>81877491
ive been to preston, was alri i spose

HelperLad this actually sounds rather serious and not like your usual japes
DON'T make it a habit

6 years ago Helper was on that Wumpagrind and it was lush.

New annoying thing just dropped. Well it didn't but it's became common enough to notice.
>People who describe anything enjoyable or good as "dopamine" or "endorphins"
Why not just reduce down further and start talking about atoms or quarks or some nonsense. annoying people

>>81877502
The least appealing place to me. Blackpool is only good for the theme park.

>>81877544
cor, seeing posts like this makes me happy. pure rush of serotonin (the happiness chemical) if you will.

>>81877490
She works harder than he ever will. She would think that's a sad lifestyle for a man. Anyway she's possibly got the skin cancer so I am praying for her.

>>81877544
Because that's what it all comes down to
Imagine being a grown ass man entertained by a kids video game for example, no you're hooked on the happy chemicals it produces in your undeveloped little child brain you sad bastards

corr lovely storm coming on. womfy. would love to run outside in it but mum would get worried.

>>81877616
Okay boomer. Opinion discarded.

>>81877616
I'd quit vidya for a girlfriend and fulfilling life. Unfortunately it's not binary. There is nothing for me to do other than play vidya and use the internet all day.

>>81877400
>I'm honestly thinking about just going teetotal for a while

>>81877491
I've been to all of those places

>>81877544
I was going to mention earlier how I was becoming addicted to the endorphins of hiking, but that's a genuine thing with endurance exercise

>>81877673
Ever been to Oldham?

In that Dandelion and Burdock again. Bloody Hell it's lush.

Why do females get treated like special creatures? She gets paid the same as a male police officer. Surely gender shouldn't matter when it comes to equality of the people he "attacked". The silly pig started crying...a grown woman decided to work in the police and found out her pussy pass doesn't exempt her from being attacked.

Women like her should work in the warehouse. Not in the police. Useless.

>>81877693
Next time I'm out I need to get a bottle of it. Not had some in about 10-15 years.

Nasty pig kicked his head in when he was down. The police should never be respected. You should do everything in your power to legally waste their time. Scum.

Going to go downstairs and treat myself to a nice wibbled egg. It lush.

>>81877720
The pigs are the only white people there lmao, even the cunts passing the door are wearing robes. Unbelievable

>>81877683
Yeah, there's actually a video of me in Oldham that's been posted here quite a few times

>>81877720
awww diddums did the poor wikkle paki get kicked after trying to take guns in an airport. such a shame

>>81877720
He deserved it to be honest me lid.

>>81877707
The mistake is on the British establishment for putting female officers into scenarios where they might get into violent altercations. It's clearly a farce.
If you're going to have women on the Police, they should really be limited to non-physical functions.

>>81877737
Is that the one with you and Poley? What ever convinced you to meet up with that cretin?

>>81877720
I'd respect them if they were genuinely rough with people who deserved it more often, instead of bullying grannies, or just fucking doing nothing when their assistance is required.

>>81877753
so many 'domestics' SHOULD be handled by women IMO, not the police. some kind of trained support workers when it's obviously not at crime/violence point.

>>81877759
Just wanted to try brown bussy for a change, wasn't very nice to be honest

>>81877759
That's the one. We all /britfeel/ers in life. If you're posting here I doubt you're much better

>>81877777
Failed to secure digits again

I'm a loser. There's not much more to it than that

>>81877779
True but Poley is a special kind of degenerate in my eyes.

>>81877793
that poor anon now has all these eyes on him/her/him. even though he's a privileged 'better to have loved than lost' guy.

>>81877798
You should be learning to code like Poundlass in San Francisco. She's been there for over 12 days. She fails her GCSEs so anything is possible de lid. Get yourself out there.

>>81877819
Perhaps but still. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. This is hardly the place for a hierarchy of morality

Why do women with autism get more support than us lads and get to go abroad on courses? I doubt she is paying for it by working part time at Poundland. It not right.

>>81877827
I admire her ability to keep a smile on her face in the face of adversity

>>81877844
if you want to be a slampig for a californian then you'll get free trips to san francisco to "learn to code"

They want us men working shit jobs like in the warehouse. Women, even the thick ones get easy jobs and opportunities. It's no wonder many young, sex starved men are throwing the towel in and not paying any taxes. Make women and immigrants work for us. It's not like you could support yourself independently anyway on minimum wage. Why bother?

on cue lad

I'm basically not fat anymore

Take me away from the cowards in this craphole country to America.

>>81877883
Squash level check?

>>81877881
i'm in some ambiguous middle ground where I don't really know if I'm fat.

>>81877869
https://desuarchive.org/r9k/search/filename/NGTOW/

change the fucking record you unwell cunt

>>81877855
It is good to always be optimistic like her despite really being intellectually challenged.

>>81877868
She's never had a sexual relationship. She's only 24. This must be labour government wasting money on autistic women again.

who else will be watching the hurling on sunday?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQm4joWw158

>>81877827
PIP payments funding a holiday to San Francisco. It lush.

>>81877844
Kek. Anon is taking the piss. She has multiple holidays a year all paid for by PIP.

>>81877913
I really should notify the DWP in Wales with this evidence. I don't think you're supposed to claim benefits in education.

>>81877893
Are you from Sainsbury's? You're from Sainsbury's aren't you?

Clockmaxxing has brought me peace in life

>>81877737
Ah its shippy Im talking to. Seen it a few times I instantly recognised the location.

>>81877935
PIP is not a means tested benefit so anyone can claim it. You know that Rosie jones cunt whos on every panel show going, probably earning 6 figures a year for her TV and comedy tours? Shes claiming PIP as well. No matter what your earnings you can claim it as long as you qualify.

Just decided I dont like wibbled eggs anymore. I dont like the texture of the white part of the egg in my mouth.

>>81877974
>wibbled eggs
hmmmm

gf keeps sending me love heart emojis. just fuck off.

Looking forward to TLA's audit tomorrow. Looks like it's gonna be a proper tyrant.

Sticking that Silence of the Lambs 4K disc on.

got that Love and Mercy on
RIP Brian Wilson. saw him live in 2017, a truly magical and yet harrowing gig. he was slumped over the piano, the body of a bear but still the fingers of an angel. he couldn't reach the high notes so would have to hand over to a specialist singer they brought on tour, I think he was the son of one of the original members (not Mike Love). anyway, it looked like he might die on stage that night and yet he played his beautiful music like it was his only purpose on this Earth. and maybe it was.

Daughter suffered toxic shock from mcdonalds hot chocolate. Might have to contact the local news sites and hopefully get some compensation.

>>81878030
damn. hope she's ok mate

>>81878030
>toxic shock from mcdonalds hot chocolate
best not to use drinks cups as a menstrual cup desu

fuck me I love the beach boys so much

>>81878030
You have a daughter? Piss off normie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RO_LX-m74uw
corr and I have to say phwooar

>>81878027
Great film that is. Sad though. But hopeful in the end. RIP.
>>81878119
What their best album? Pet Sounds?

>tfw you will never be a prisoner throwing cum.at jodie foster

>>81878160
it's hard to look past Pet Sounds as their best. I think it's certainly Brian Wilson's best creation. Sunflower, which this (>>81878124) is from, might be the whole group's best album though. I think MIke Love had a big hand in this first iteration of what shoegaze would become and Carl Wilson did a lot of the production. But Brian Wilson was instrumental to it all, as ever.

if you think about it, everyone who has wronged you could go on to hurt other people, so in a way, it would be wrong NOT to kill them.

quiet in here tonight x

>>81878352
takin a minute, drinking a milky shake

>>81878362
nice one lad. just had a wee cry to love and mercy myself

quidproquo clarice
yes or no

any good riots today? Bit bored now

Behold thy mother x

Heavenly mammy pls help me become better for my earth mammy x

>>81876094
Aye their celtic game is today.Will it really be that many?Thats mad

crossy hath returned?!

Ave always had a soft spot 4 newcastle, Why?....Bc we went there on a day out wiv my skewl once Nd.........its as simple as that really,I would say it felt quite similar to glasgow.I dont know if all these northern places are jst the same.I spoke to a english that asked directions nd he said something like this."Glasgow reminds me of Birmingham" or something like that I said ave never been there "All these places are the same" neway,with my teacher n the class we went in st james park which was kewl. Am quite easily impressed like...................Nothing exciting needs to happen but its just if i have a personal connection established even for a day then am now counting that as one of my places that i like. So ave always liked newcastle.

Nd as well i had a online pal online that was a Lassie from newcastle whos a furry.We havent spoke in years i guess she got sick of me but we were quite good pals back then as much as you can be on internet.Nd as well nufc strip looks kewl i think

>>81878600
Am here altho am gna sleep soon how r you?x

>>81878663
think a lot of lads from Edinburgh come down for the games
met a few at the st. james park
can't get tickets now though

Got sugar free vimto squash today nd it just doesnt hit the same.Flavour wise but........... Its still good though but aye u notice. The normal one on the side was like sugar 12% nd on this one it was like 1%. U cant really argue with that.

Am watching that obituary on ntflix. Somebody on here recommended

>>81878231
Ppl dont wrong each other they just wrong me bc they dont view me as properly human so they dnt care.But amongst themselfs they get along fine nd theyre more likely to team up so theuy can double betray me even more than have a falling out themself. Its the entire human race vs me.Am not saying this is true but thats honestly my gut feeling when i read what u said here.Ppl have betrayed me in the past so i dnt trust anybody now.

Am tryingto have a more positive outlook though jst last few days been feeling low n anxious so i cant help it sometmes

Altho,,i was so expecting the worst from going to my eye test yday nd like as if ill get treated really bad somehow but desu the optician lassie was so nice it was crazy. I felt quite good by the time id left.

Two two two x

>>81878698
woo i'm not bad marra

>>81878663
yeah it's nice

glad the eye test went all right

everything is spooky. so here's the deal:
HHL, be fine.
x, be fine.
me? i'll be fine.

>>81877267
I like her

>>81878770
That was me. Any thoughts on Aya Matsuura?

>>81876927
Just got off work my leeed.
>>81876913
Nappyposting begins now.
>>81875925
If you pay for streaming services you are probably a cuckold, and the jews have done a number on you. As you were.

>>81878946
>>81878972
Sorry I'm a fucking idiot. Started trying to listen to some J-Pop since you mentioned it. You're right about streaming not having a lot of stuff. Been listening to some Aya Matsuura and liking it though.

>>81878987
I like yuko nakazawa as well that was in hello project/morning musume like aya was https://youtu.be/WH-GBygizDs

Corrr! Silence of the Lambs holds up really well. Jodie Foster is one of the greatest IMO. Just a great career from the beginning. Might watch Red Dragon again, haven't seen that in years. Think I've seen Hannibal the most.
I wish the show wasn't cancelled so it could have got to the Clarice parts. Mads as Hannibal was pure kino.

>>81878987
What else do u like ? My fav ever is probs utada Hikaru. Love Perfume too https://youtu.be/H4znsXCH_2Y

>>81876309
Strange how you never seem to lose isn't it lad? Statistically improbable I'd say

>>81878890
Yea x

>>81877974
I luv scrambled eggs n i want them now bc of this post but its too late at night my strawbs r in the fridge still waiting for me so it's k

>>81879038
Thanks I added some of those to my list as well. Hells bells that Morning Musume has had a lot of members over the years.

>>81879067
Liked this show to begin with but felt the recent season was a bit exploitative and lots of weird far right grifter parents using their kids on it.
>>81879059
I am new to the genre so taking all recommendations.

>>81879080
No crossy a wibbled egg is what I like to call scotch eggs. I also do enjoy scrambled eggs n all has to have plenty of salt and butter in.
Good to see you back my man I hope you have been ok.

>>81879165
I had absolutely no bloody clue what you meant earlier when you posted wibbled eggs but gonna start using that term now me thinks. I like a good poached egg myself but shit at making the buggers.

>>81879184
Haha. I'm glad to see somebody else likes using the term "wibbled egg" been saying it to myself for years now.

>>81879107
Kyary pamyu https://youtu.be/jcIOg_m-bp4 Hanabie https://youtu.be/PLfZ54FUG5w Utada https://youtu.be/0Uhh62MUEic Salyu https://youtu.be/dI6mNmHrggc do as infinity https://youtu.be/6I1iVD0BBqg sum I like. Nd everything by Perfume

Nd I like globe https://youtu.be/Y7F9vjr_O0Q and Capsule

>>81879203
>>81879224
Thank you found some of these on Apple Music. Japanese idols are a strange phenomenon especially the teen idols. I remember seeing a documentary about the teenage swimsuit photoshoots very seedy stuff.

>>81879245
Yea ctual idol groups like morning musume the music isnt always the focus so its not alwasy that great but Perfume is an idol group but their music is great too.Nd another idol singer i like Akina Nakamori shes from the 80s so it doesnt sound as modern but i like her voice

Feel like getting my dehumidifier running again. x My old faithful. The sound is so relaxing. Am burning up a bit. But mind u. Ave not put the fan on at all this whole summer so far.

>>81879279
It's been especially humid and muggy here the past 24 hours. Been thinking if getting a dehumidifier myself. Used to have an air purifier and the noise was soothing.

Mind when Poppy started on youtube nd when she was doing music first nd it was really mysterious nd kewl x Am i a girl x nd she went to Manchester nd was sposed to go to glasgow which got cancelled x from covid x nd then the big dramas with titanic sinclair x not nice x messy x havent rly followed her since then x

>>81879306
Oh its bliss a air purifier is good too for humming noise i used to run my dehumidifier 24/7 something about the noise this 1 makes digs right under my nerves nd calms me down ave tried other dehumidifiers but this 1 is special

Ave got some important businessesto do on my laptop but I do it tomoz x

Tbh the breeze coming in ma window is quite nice though

Have my wee strawbos n get into my beds i fink my wee organic strawbos

Free free free

Fink thers a fair chance my mam will want to go out for T tomoz if its a sunny day shes kind of the opposite of me where its warm n she wants to go outside even more than before whereas am looking for where i can stay in the shade hidden away from the elements feels like its been a very long summer so far

Breaks my heart sumtimes when i think about life x

>thunderstorms all tomorrow afternoon
womfy

Meowhaps a final cuppa

Todays choccy craving was mint aero,,ave got some but ave been good.Normally am Cadburys all the way over NEstle. Its not even close. However you cant deny aeros r goated nd kit kats r goated x will jst have my eat natural peanut choccy protein bar

Mint aeros how I love u n want you inside me xx

https://youtu.be/mlFmnPkS64o

wissed yourself lately crossy?

Aldi does a strawberry & cream version of their Baileys knock off now,,nd a mint choccy one too.Id luv to sample em but am aff it.

Mint choccy rocky roads nd mint choccy ice cream cones nd mint choccy cadburys crisp choccy bar nd mint choccy baileys

And peppermint slices................................................................................

>>81879615
No its under control.That was 1 off.

Ngl am aff the drink still however if somebody offered me a mint choccy baileys thats getting necked on sight wewwwwwwww imagine this on a warm day

Sry that piccy is a martini wiv normal baileys.This is the special mint one.I dont encourage/condone drinking alcohol though.x ITs the demon drink.

Lately my spirits is low but the Lord is my shepherd n i wont be lost forever x

MINT CHOCCY TERRYS CHOCCY ORANGE!

Tomoz my plan have a comfy day n watch netflix on my lappy in bed but if mam want to go out for din dins i do that 1st

>>81876434
I did one last night in order 2 fall asleep But thats the first one ave done in a while the total amount ave done this month will be single digits. Its not very comfy trying to do it when its too warm as well

Taken my wee fluoxetines for today already i fink

Its honestly borderline a miracle how ave hardly drank since Lent. Ok i slipped up few times but compared to how I was before its nothing. Jst need aff the other stuff now.
>444AR

>>81879694
have you ever had a grasshopper cocktail crossy? I think you'd love it

Frm God's perspective He can see everything past present n future He sees all events n thoughts n everything that will ever happen all at the same time. I wonder if my aunty watches me frm heaven then how much does she get to know about me like what am thinking about during the day n stuff cus it would be embarrassing. I think she would be quite upset if she saw my life. Its not right.

PRetty kewl piccy. Its playstations in ministry of sound nightclub in London. Pic from 1995
>>81879909
No never had it looks rly nice. Ave not had many cocktails really. I like white russian.x

Awful tummy cramps de lads. My punishment for daring to eat a choccy icecream as a milklet ibs chad.

Made wee new one bc this will be the 500th post so i fink it a bump limit.If thats ok wiv u
>>81880036
>>81880036
>>81880036
>>81880036
>>81880036