Release the hostages edition

my septum is crumbling

>>82097190
The interview for the CS is difficult though. I doubt a really autistic person could pass that. Its very specific.

It ova

I hope Israel nukes Gaza, bombs mecca, and gets rid of that ugly fucking mosque in their city. Fuck pisslam

>>82097373
koalas are class. just hanging out, getting high on plants.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtpMz5HmDpA
this is scary stuff. did a sloth come all the way from some lower point on the zipline? does it understand it's really high up? mad to think any animal could just be that chill.

Quick update on the red telephone situation?

>>82097376
Whoa that's wild. Anyway, release the Epstein files

>>82097376
I hope you will have sex some day

Job search not going well

>>82097376
If I ever become PM I will declare Islam a terrorist organisation and make membership and public worship punishable by law, akin to treason.

>>82097373
Has it dislocated it's right leg? It's facing the wrong way.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/keir-starmer-launches-major-plan-35680030
Nice one, a couple of climbing walls and music lessons should sort it all out

>>82097415
She finally answered and now Shippy is going to live with her in Jamaica

>>82097447
remember a friend applying for some job where the American business owner was bringing howdy yee-haw American business sensibilities over to us limeys.

application form couldn't ask blatant discrimination questions but it's obvious the guy had written them himself, to fish for information. stuff about whether it's okay if a co-worker smokes or wears make-up, would you report an office fling, is Christianity important to your working life.

>On this occasion we will not be progressing with your application as we have received interest from candidates that more closely match the requirements of the role.
Haha weird that. Considering my last job that I spent 5 years in was exactly the role you're asking for?

>>82097497
perhaps a candidate has spent 6 years in the same role.

>>82097373
Well the pandas at edinbrgh zoo got sent back to China few yrs ago nd I think theyd still never made a wean nd theyd been there for like 10 years together. I was more affected by it when they left than I expected fr some reason I jst felt more happy knowing they were in Scotland than not nd I was at the zoo once while they were there but I never saw them properly cant remember why they might have beeb asleep. I did see the polar bear at edinbrgh zoo which at the time I thought that cant be right for a polar bear to be here nd they actually did remove them in 2009 for that reason,,,dtill has red panda tho as does flamingo land,,not sure if there's any giant pandas anywhere in the uk now. It sad

did they ever explain this?

I mean am happy fr them if they're happier in china but it sad on a personal level nd it sad that they didn't feel like making another one

Told me Mam I'm not coming over today. Don't like going over when I'm wired like this x

>>82097504
I would think Scotland is an okay place for a polar bear desu

Are there any hostage left? What would be the point of them keeping them this long exactly? Clearly they're not using them as leverage. Just a fun little rape puppet maybe?

>>82097501
>perhaps a candidate has spent 6 years in the same role.
Maybe. But I have a total of 10 years. My last job was 5 years, one before that 4 and one before that 1.

>>82097524
They are leverage lad. Leverage, deterrants, bargaining chips.

Polar bears are pretty cool.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FhGOV7fs64

>>82097524
how common is hostage rape? do armed guards (male, any culture) not just have some sense of discipline?

>>82097521
Haha. Yrah i dont know. Something ahout it just looked a bit sad. Also it's funny cus I was looking for piccys of the exact 1 in edinburfh nd I found this blog https://www.edwud.com/mercedes-the-polar-bear-at-edinburgh-zoo/
That says rhis
> I noticed the sad expression on the Polar Bears face
So it wasnt jst me
And that it was on its own
That was part of it jst looked alone nd sad but am not sure if that's normal for them
Well it's gone now neways

>>82097547
has a dog's face.

Wokey says jump, HHL asks how high. Sad.

>>82097547
They are kewl nd cute but i would be pretty uncomfortable if i came across 1 in the wild DVDlad style

radiolad posting in the dead thread ONCE AGAIN. you think he'd understand communications better.
>>82097539
glad to hear it, tune in to some of them numbers stations and crack the code

when did /britfeel/ take hostages??

>>82097587
Shippy wants to rebuild the temple on the Al Aqsa mount, it's part of his grand strategy, so he's taken hostages

>>82097587
24 July, deadline for implementing online age checks. we'll release them once Ofcom agrees to our demands.

better to be comfy on these tramadols then in pain from ketamine.

>>82097572
They're both part of the order Carnivora
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnivora

Shippy doesn't look like it, but he's actually a descendant of the Prophet Muhammad.

>>82097607
i like how Wikipedia's examples on the right basically all make sense there, then there's a fucking walrus

Lads having fun drinking and getting high.
Me? Just home from work and melting into the sofa

QRD on aliens in October?

that's me on holiday until Tuesday next week lads. going Isle of Wight for the long weekend, aren't I? I am, aren't I? oh and the weather looks lush x

>>82097607
More specifically, they're both caniforms.

cIunge

Spackermaxxing, me

>>82097666
Wet, hairy clunge throbbing in pleasure as a large penis slides in and out of it.

Doves deodorants is rly different than it used to be its lik3 rly spicy nd strong nd quite masculine when it used tk be more soft nd basically like the soap like you'd imagine. I used to like it yearsnago but it's way way different now

in America, 'Dove' is what they call Galaxy chocolate.

imagine that. eating a bar of Dove.

>>82097694
Why not an average sized penis? Or maybe even one slightly shorter than average? I mean some lads are built that way, right? Decent lads. Lads who might be unusually long in some places, say the neck or something (just as an example) and slightly smaller in other ways. Nothing wrong with it.

I had to double check it's rly dove nd I wasnt confused. Its like pure cinnamon pr something pure pure strong Its quite nice in a way but as a one off not something you want to smell over the whole day. The old 1 was much nicer

>partner is 'fine with' my willy
nonce.

>>82097697
I just go with whatever FCUK stuff I get at christmas, that usually lasts a year or 2.
For proper smelly, I like joop, or happy clinique (for men). Kouros is a favourite as well, and back in t'day I loved a spray of calvin klein crave, but they don't make that anymore.

I'm gonna die a virgin x

Weird feeling x

me? below average in the penis, above average in the belly

>partner is 'fine with' my neck length

>>82095431
how does HelperLad cope with his average average intelligence?

haha nooo urs is perfect :3 the big ones hurt anywayy

>claims to be high IQ
>is a dole dosser who lives in a care home and not a renowned academic/scientist/doctor or something along those lines
Really makes you think...

>>82097857
>does it feel better when i use my whole hand, or just my fingers?

pretty emasculating, tbqh ;__;

why is it so hard to get a lean face, low enough bf% to have abs and have a jawline but its so easy to end up with a slightly bloated face

honestlyy its fine im not into sex rlly anyway, why are you obsessing over it its only dick size so what if his was bigger im with u now soo

Dunno about getting on it on a wednesday desu

100 grand for you, Maybe more. If ye pass the trials in store.

>>82097857
>>82097913
you're good at this, you should get on them pills that turn you into a woman.

>>82097935
can i just have 50 for doing nothing? fugg, wouldnt even turn my nose up at 20

>>82097943
20 or 50 Or more you may ask. Should ye complete this dreadful task.

If it's just sex you're after, head on down t'local clunge factory and purchase a rent-a-hole.

>>82097936
to be fair I do have the long hair but ive got a serious case of man face bone structure, it would be ridiculous looking, especially with how neck down I'm built for tilling the fields, legs look like a farkin gorrilas with the hair as well, be a nightmare shaving. If i was a proper sad case I could probably fool some outer r9k mong into sending me money but I cant be fucked and its a bit arl arse innit

If I won a million tomorrow id pay off the house. But after that fuck knows. Actually id probably get a bigger house with a garage. Asides from that I don't want for much desu. Quitting work is standard ofc

if the tests ye fail to pass,
0 quid for your sorry ass.

The so-called white wupremacist wapu

>>82097972
feel somebody neeeew at the gloryy hoole
fill someone with gooooo at the gloryy hooole
no one judges youuuuuuu at the gloryyy hooole

but apu is green

The United KKKingdom

My head is done in, is it not? Bloody ell. Gonna have a drink.

look stop asking me to do stuff im not comfortable with, yeah i did it for him a few times but ive literally changed since then like im not that into sex okay?? like if ur gonna be like this then we should just break up i feel like im being suffocated :(

>i know you'd never pressure me to have sex
that was a weird one. no idea where it came from. can't tell if it was snake shit, or just word-for-word true (which it was)

might re-install farming simulator, become a virtual farmer innit

Really enjoying women do funny things compilations. Hot women, but it is funny as well. This just had me snorting like a pig.

https://youtu.be/-LzmpdUejIQ?feature=shared&t=491

How are you guys posting here, isn't 4chan blocked in britain now?

>haha nooo urs is perfect :3 the longer necks are more likely to break anywayy

>>82098136
they made an exception for /britfeel/ because they knew there would be widespread civil disorder if it got banned

>>82098136
It is, we've all moved to murrica now, so we have a work around. Yeehaw n all that.

>moved in next door to frostyjackz

>>82098136
i'm not actually British, i just read Harry Potter and i'm playing pretend. currently eating mustard and crisps.

Oh God bless Shippy and the family of Shippy

>blessed is the fruit of the loom
Mandela effect

>>82098198
>the family of Shippy
They like to be called the fleet.

a gaggle of Helpers

>https://old.reddit.com/r/UKJobs/comments/1miiqdr/uk_job_market_is_the_worst_ive_ever_seen/
Brutal out there atm

>>82098257
That subreddit should be called "UK losers"

>>82098257
Don't be too worried lad, that's old reddit, current reddit might be different.

>>82098281
never change /britfeel/s

One decision from Shippy ruined my whole uni plan and possibly my future

ONLY GONE AND POSTIN INT HE OTHER TRHEAD, WONIIIII? FUCKIN SAUSAGE!

mad how that zyzz lad on /fit/ DID go and self improve and get buff and all that, and the end result was that he died.
that's the fate that awaits us all.

>>82097586
Thanks for noticing me senpai. I have been busy.

Is cold water enough to clean my Fleshlight? I did use liquid hand soap but apparently this degrades the rubber? I'm not going to pay a premium for a "fleshlight cleaning solution"

>>82098136
hhl says jump
ofcom say how high

The little sunderland guy with the long neck is easily baited and rattled

>>82098136
IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME
YOU GUYS STOP LAUGHING AT ME
IT WILL HAPPEN
JUST BECAUSE IT HASNT HAPPENED THE OTHER 200 TIMES IVE SAID IT

Just got back from Costco with mammy. She wanted some collagen milkshake mix bollocks and I got some of those cinnamon rolls. God they are lush. Went to the food court and had a hotdog and 2 slices of wizza it lush. Corrr there was a woman there who looked like belle delphine eating one of those double choc cookies. Couldn't take my eyes off her she was beautiful. Lots of chinks in there n all. Odd.

I think the gov genuinely don't understand that if an American company doesn't comply, they don't comply.
They have a lot of delusion about their own power on the world stage. Remember when they threatened to have Elon Musk expedited, and he was like "lol".

>parents don't get me a Dreamcast as a child (i.e. abuse)
>wonder why i never contact them

>>82098474
baka. wish I'd gotten a dreamcast when that was going on. Felt like it was around for all of five seconds, was way too expensive, and then it was gone.

>>82098459
Is it worth the membership, do they have normal stuff or is it like a cash and carry and you buy in bulk?
So a good thing the other day about costco, and how the membership is a big earner for them. Money for nothing really. Say they have 5 million people that pay 5 pound a year or whatever, that's 25 million, for nothing, it's just people giving money to be able to shop there.

My parents bought me the following when I was a kid
>PS1
>N64
>PS2
>Dreamcast
>GameCube
>Xbox
>Xbox 360
>PS3
>GameBoy Advance/SP
>PSP
Was I spoiled?

>>82098491
My mum is daft she just pays the membership fee anyway, I bet we go in there 2-3 times a year that's it. Lots of bulk items for sale like 30 bottles of water on a pallet for 5 quid or something and it's a little bit expensive on other items. The the food court is good.

>>82098520
Depends on the circumstances

>>82098520
yep. i had the same set up except my 23 IQ brother would keep breaking/misplacing the discs so console would become useless real quick

>>82098520
I had SNES, gameboy color, N64, Sega Saturn, PS1, GameCube, GBA, PS2

>>82097348
Snort more coke

might have an emo wednesday lads

>>82098209
Made me google it award
>>82098520
U were spoilt for having two parents at home

Just done a massive poo. The poo dropped out of my arsehole like a cannon ball. Wtf.

U know how incels will see a sob story about sum guy that lost his wife n kids n his legs got amputated nd his dog got ran over nd theyre like that Wait a minute this guy HAD A GF so Hes not as sad as ME in life actually
Thats how I am when ppl disclose that they had a 2 parent household
JSt being honest

for me it's not having pooed in several days, taking opiates over that period, and now worrying about the future

>>82098609
your mammy sounds lovely but you probably COULD have done with a father figure.

Talking about growing up wiv your dad in the context of youve got some kind of hard life is an instant sybau for me

>>82098620
What if someone was telling you they were raped by their father?

dad used to run me over in his car on purpose

>>82098619
lol you think lad?

>>82098619
I know that is true academically but its like a blind person thats alwaays been blind you know something is missing but you dont really have the experience to be that upset about it but it is still upsetting at the same time somehow. Rn am more upset about my knee though jst back from having a walk nd its doing the burning thing I dont know why its all kicked off with this again in the last few weeks. After years of being stable I sense its like a sick joke that Its just when i was trying to quit painkillers again

>>82098537
I just had a look, and it's a lot more than a 5er. I don't think I qualify for membership, and doubt I'd want to pay that much just for something I'd only use occasionally.

kill every hostage

Its gna be one of those 2x 4x dosage days.Why is life so filled wiv pain instead of nice things.x

Ts pmo
NIGGA!

Talking about growing up with your dad in the context of you've got some kind of hard cock is an instant sybau for me

would have liked a sister.
very masculine household.
(nothing to do with hard cocks.)

*sends the special spacca services to free the hostages* they'll be on the first reasonably priced flight over after a weeks bonding in frenerife

>very masculine household
YIKES!

>>82098739
if anything it was anti-gay. i cried when my cousin's rottweiler bit me when i was about 9, ended up being called a soft nancy boy poof for ages.

you end up just hiding shit, when people go on about 'good' masculine men, dads, brothers and that, i really just don't know what that means. didn't toughen me up or anything like that.

I know this probably isn't the place for this, but I'm at a loss anyway so here goes.

I'll be honest, I'm a loser. Nearly 29m, still live at home, never had a real job, no qualifications other than a btech, an empty cv, actually I don't even have a cv haha. I am not independent in the slightest.

Same story with social life/romantic life, non existent. Never been to a party or anything like that, genuinely don't think I've ever even hugged anyone. Know a few people from hobbies but don't relate to them in any way for obvious reasons.

For as long as I can remember, I've never had any goals or ambitions to do anything. I've never been interested in being anything. Did pretty well at school (mostly A's) but was woefully behind in the social skills department. It went downhill pretty fast after that, tried a bunch of stuff but couldn't cope with all the newness that came with it, ended up quitting everything I tried and dropped out of society ever since, I clearly wasn't capable of functioning properly anyway.

What advice would you give to someone in my situation, if it's not clear I mentally checked out years ago so any motivation is non existent. Be as brutal as you like, I won't be offended. Also before anyone asks, I don't claim anything so don't worry your tax money is safe.

For some reason ppl r surprised that new balance isnt cheap
Its like they think its so beneath them that it mjust be cheap
Not so.

>>82098795
>What advice would you give to someone in my situation
take LSD and go outside
or
take valium and go outside

>I don't claim anything
why not? either you're wealthy/living off a wealthy family, (and then i hate you more than if you claimed benefits)...or you're not claiming benefits when you should.
you have to declare when you're unemployed to the DWP. check your National Insurance record.

Did anon's therapy woman visit go well?

>>82098833
Hi that was me. Yes she was very kind. It was just a basic introduction to what the service offers and talking about tism and stuff. It is a specialist therapy sessions for people with autism.

For sum reason hugo boss in motion was rly appealing when it was a wee silver nd orange spherical bottle about 10 yrs ago but now that its in a normal boring 1 its just not the same Nd shows the power of presentation.It had a nice scent like Orange not that strong.I would like it as a gift albeit i wouldnt buy it now

Its strange to me when these companys have something rly cool nd they just scrap it nd replace with something completely shit n boring like how magic stars dont have the wee faces n sunglasses anymore

>do beavers have tails mandela effect

Finally completed Mario Party 1. Probably took me about 20 hours to finish. What a ball ache it was, looking back I did enjoy it. I would give this game a 7/10

>>82098853
That's good. I thought things would go ok for you. Most of the therapists are probably ok.

just caught HIV in Pokemon Chalk

*buys a mansion on klarna payment*
*chabnges name by deed poll*

Those cinnamon rolls say "the original 2 bite" bollocks I can do it in one bite.

Oh fucking hell fucking fire. That greasy Costco wizza has gone straight through me. Shitting through the eye of a needle here at b towers. Oh eck.

>>82098946
Never knew that Blad stood for Bulk Buying Lad

if it's a mansion you wish to see,
you must send us these payments three

i've a pizza in the fridge. wanted one of those supermarket Pizza Express ones but Sainsbo's substituted it for their OWN-BRAND pepperoni pizza reee.
also reimbursed me 50p for the swap but then PayPal only put it through as 36p. no idea what's going on there.

Been up since 6:30. Can't wait for beddingtons me turning into a right proper old man I am.

if i sleep soon, and get a good 12 hours in, it'll be the morning, would be 8am if i went to bed now.
then it'd only be 3-4 hours until the post arrives.

hope you all doing alright there
i am doing alright there x

>>82099069
i'm twitching and freaking out a bit occasionally like when you see those shell shock soldiers
but it's okay because it will end

Barely touched that wokey me.

>>82099017
Same, had a pregab earlier and feeling almost ready for bed.

tempted to visit HHL in sunderland and share a bag with him in the beehive

>ruths dad buying her a BYD dolphin surf

>>82099084
Good use of a hundred squids mong

>>82098986
not fucking rite lad, not comprable qaulity despite the refund

>>82099084
wokey might not be for you but it is for me

>>82099104
> share a bag with him in the beehive
you got a loicence for that m8?

>>82099104
whats the story here, did the bar post or or was it a HHL superfan?

>>82099127
people seem to not like these, don't know why. pretty basic but they're just nice.

used to get them on special in Waitrose of all places. we're talking 10 years ago now, but the bigger ones would just half price to 2.50 or summat. great times.

>>82099157
A 1/1,000,000 find. Some lad stumbled upon it by pure chance and lo and behold our welper was in the video kek.

>>82099157
it's from their Facebook. marmiteman4 himself was in their venue.

>>82099104
Move u dumb fucking slags The king wee is here scram *boots a football off ur head*

>>82099164
These r on sale a lot in tescos nd I fink sometimes in co op or used to be. Am not somebody that eats pizza a lot but i like that 1

the Rocket League champions are taking their skills into the real world

Bennies might not be attractive to the opposite sex but I am womfy regardless.

>>82099192
i guess the best pizzas you can get, really, are the pizza counters in Asda or Morrisons. they are just good, but fuck me do they pile on the toppings.
like the Pizza Express ones because they're fairly 'light' as far as pizzas go. those little babby Chicago Town ones are too bready, pizzas should be THIN

Am feeling quite angry nd grumpy today bc im in some pain. This is why old ppl r always in a bad mood

>bennies? just a side hustle. my main gig is drug dealing.

the ladies love a bad boy.

>>82099226
hope you feel better soon.
i feel jittery but not in a tetchy way. had my second tramadol and a DHC and now i reckon i'm only going to have one more. zolpidem later and it'll all calm down.

>>82099226
It's true. I had 2 months of backpain during the night, and I was the grumpiest fucker on the planet. Imagine if it was like that permanently.

A drug dealer would get way more pussy than some office wage cuck. Also, you can bribe girls to sleep with you for drugs

just like heart skipping a beat kinda, very aware of my skeleton so i'm holding my neck all rigid. weirdly my hands are not shaking but i suspect i just need to lean into the comf.

Like this tune https://youtu.be/-CjEyWe8lXg

>>82099257
>Also, you can bribe girls to sleep with you for drugs
Consider the kind of woman who will sleep with you for drugs, however:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4GyIbBUt1IU

>>82099254
Ave had that wired feeling frm opiates before. U may be dehydrated tho and take antihistamine of you have some

>>82099276
Poor wee dog.............not right

new HHL picture, he cute x

>>82099301
twink death got him

>>82099280
i'm getting plenty of water (and pop tbf) just a bit bouncy. oh well it'll all pass

>>82099301
>>82099321
wow yeah
i'm not one to talk but Sean lad are you OK

why is Sean doxxing himself

Sean is one of the better looking lads in the thread

>>82099369
he is, but in that picture he actually looks like he's in his 30s now.
he also looks like a human with actual emotions. are you sure it's him?

>>82099369
This but unironically, he cute

>>82099301
>HHL 1532.jpg
Coooorrrrr can you upload your Sean folder to mega de lid? Would love 1500 pics of him on my hard drive.

Stalkers stalkers everywhere.

>>82099321
no self respecting man wants to look like a twink, ever

driving test next week and absolutely shit at reverse bay parking. what other types of parking can they ask for?

if there was an evil version of Crossy she would be called Noughty

>>82099452
Off the bridge into the river, paralell on rail crossing, across the entrance to A&E, the list goes on.

imagine if HHL started transitioning at 13 or 14, corrrrr

So despondent about the old futureberg aren't I. Shower will wash away the strain from my eyes. Probably.

>>82099528
how does AI do this? i don't care if that fence isn't at the correct angle to the original fence, it is just somehow painting NEW information, on the image

>>82099274
Good version that was lad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7dk9DXFrwk
always thought this was fascinating
i don't get why pop musicians aren't the people who actually wrote the songs

>>82099164
i like the sloppy guiseppe but only really get them when there's money off feel they're a bit overpriced most of the time

>>82099217
based thin crust enjoyer. wizza is wizza but cant be doing with the chicago deep dish ones look like a bloody quiche they do

*ruins your pizza*

Sean in stockings

>we could've had help helper lass

no rite

decided to quarter the 'za. am once again dealing with the problem that it will not fit in the air fryer properly, no matter how i slice it.

oh god
>pepperoni has gone black/shrivelled
>base is still squidgy and undercooked
well. maybe this is how i like it.

https://youtu.be/BrVbjPhbnps

>>82100076
thumbnail looks like ai, shall not watch

>>82100076
based protestor. Veitch would never.

>>82100122
The thumbnail is ai but the vid is real

>>82099107
Nepotism gets you far in this country.

>everyone angry the man might NOT get locked up forever, just for saying a few words

he didn't even actually have a bomb. passengers handled it well. comes off more like he's a person having a mental episode than making some political statement (and if you consider this 'real' terrorism instead of fuckingnothing.jpg he's doing a terrible job)

just worried i'll have a bit of a mad one some day. say some stupid shit.
>oi mate i'll fucking shoot you i have a gun i swear
or something. despite not actually having a gun or wanting to shoot anyone.

(((They))) really do be crying out in pain as (((they))) strike you, do (((they))) not

You lads discovered any nice brit asmr lasses lately?

>>82099609
Cathy Dennis did try and become an at, but it didn't work out and she stuck with mostly just writing. This song by the way, is rumoured to have been written about that TV vet guy. They were a couple for a while

>>82099528
You're a weird pervert lad, and it seems to involve children a lot.

>>82100285
his post relies on the passage of time for HHL to transition into an adult human female. 'started at'.

>>82100076
There's comedy in how quickly they fold the second they face any resistance from Bazza.
>I'm so sorry sir, was just a prank

>>82100285
Just a bit of banter, lad x

Cba to drink anymore. Just vibing classic HHL style x

Only gone an shit meself, Ennnii, lads?
Oh my daaaaayyyyz!

>>82100376
Have you ever thought about transitioning?

All in all were jst another brick in the meow

>when a femoid complains about incels but u have to hide ur power level because u don't want to break rules 1 & 2

>>82097341 (OP)
Fuck Israel and fuck the hostages tbqh. They're starving? How sad.

>>82100538
they've freed all the women anyway

>>82100506
Christ Arlene Foster's really let herself go

What is known about this manlet in the beehive webm?

>>82100570
Not seen this but he looks like he's got a Manchester accent

>>82100506
She looks like the kind of woman who'd make me kiss her feet

>>82099107
He already bought her a Peugeot

>>82100570
It's Steve from the care home

>>82100558
No seriously though, now they're fucking crying starvation? Fuck off with that nonsense. The gaslighting is fucking astronomical, bollocks to Netanyahu and anyone who follows him.

>>82100591
new car, it a reward for being a top shaggerette x

Why r moids like this

VERY sating foodingtonshire this was

Ought to lie down now don't i

>>82100636
what do you mean me lad?

>>82100636
cause we wanna touch your sweet lil butt and you NEVER LET US. AAAAAA

Proper cosy night in watching the Osbourne's. Quality stuff this, Ozzy was just cunted the entire time eh

i regret having the third pizza quarter.
will feel daft tomorrow too. "want 1/4 of a pizza?" - me (future)

>>82099257
I know they do, had a drug dealer mate in uni who got ridiculous amounts of clunge from all types of girls from popular ones to goths purely because he had drugs, 5'9, not the most hygenic, room was a shit tip, outspoken but odd and fucked all sorts.

feels weird now that reality-TV-for-reality-TV's-sake was a whole thing in the noughties
Big Brother? great idea (to begin with)
The Osbournes? sure, they're a weird rock star family

but zoomers will NEVER understand
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Andre#Television_2

>>82100689
Oh i was jst thinking about something

>>82100777
Aye, 99% of 'reality' TV is bullshit. Really, BB and the Osbourne's pioneered this shit. Didn't the Osbourne's get robbed at some point after the 1st season? People used the footage to plan the break in or some shit.

>>82100801
i'm a moid, please do not be moidist ;_;

>>82100745
I always feel ike that after pizzas desu.I used to like dominos though

>>82100809
Its myself included.I am moids.What a state we are though

It was so exciting when dominos had the wee thing on their app that Was ilke a robot or something Nd you could just sit n stare at your phone waiting for the pizza to arrive.It was before everybody had a app yet

moidy and foidy sittin in a tree

>>82100843
Could you try being a foid for a bit? I am very lonely today.

>>82100858
ohh yeah i remember this.
even the mad web page with all the menus being kind "live" and web 2.0 but in a way a lot of sites weren't. then the lil robot guy would pop up, "your pizza is in the oven!" and that. HOW IS IT DOING THAT IN REAL-TIME??

I always feel opiate withdrawals in my legs n feet first jst like really cold nd sharp feeling Nd once i take some its the opposite where thats normally the part of my body that feels the best cus i love stretching my legs when it kicks in.In particular like I always went on the sofa nd jst stretch my legs looking at stuff on my phone n pass hours like that very contented. I dont know maybe its because thats where my actual medical pain is that I notice it more there but then again Restless legs syndrome is also a real thing for anybody coming off

I guess its like when ppl talk about your legs going like jelly Like my sober legs are very stern nd grim feeling Like am too aware that ave got legs. Nd then once the morphine hits its like How youd imagine somebody in a wheelchairs legs is like jst really soft nd doughy like buttery bread melting in a oven nd jst like Mmmm nd the floor feels like rubber like a soft play area nstead of this oppressive bleak concrete

>>82100892
was mad bouncing my legs as i read this haha. probably not even in withdrawal mode yet (not looking forward to that, to be perfectly honest) but it is a synchronicity i tell you

>am too aware that ave got legs.
lol that actually made me laugh out loud

me and crossy chilling in an opium den together

no idea what to do with my future, 24, could save for a deposit, no idea how mortgages work, maybe they're a scam, maybe I should fuck off out of the country, maybe save for an acre of land to put a flatpack cabin on it, fuck knows.

do wheelchair leg-havers still have to exercise their legs? or at least move them about?
paraplegia, say. maybe they can't use the muscles, but they're still inside the leg. same with bones.

>>82100957
get a gf and a sprog de lad

My crackhead mate has really done me over. I'm not going to get my stuff back, I'm not a cunt and won't say stuff's stolen and get him in shit. I know some think he deserves it, but it's not what frens do, even though what he did is something frens shouldn't do. I have said, I was a rotter in the past (ex smackhead) so I know what it's like, but it still hurts (especially the fishing stuff, but I can salvage my river fishing setup with a reel from my carp rod).
List of things that I now don't have: bite alarms for carp fishing and all the and their receiver, bosch drill, shitty small circular saw, OG playstation, pioneer wego decks, firestick (that may turn up somewhere, but I'm sure it was here), a fishing reel, potentially another 1 as I can't remember if I had 1 on my spod rod (80% sure I did). Thankfully he didn't know what muh cherryMX switches were, and I don't think there's any old family stuff (I've kept) that's missing. PC is here as well with the keyboard I'd left him to use, I think he knows I would have gone apeshit if that went. Really mad thing is I've known him for years, really good frens, and my bestfren married his sister.
IRL is FUBAR, I'd stick to the digital realm, lads, it's much more fun. If I was drinking tonight, I'd be proper miffed, but with a pregab, life's good, chill af.

Miss the alizee posts

>>82100959
I dont know bt they can go swimming n that. They usually have strong arms frm pushing around. Ave known somebody that didnt get a electric one by choice frm that.

The night before I started buprenorphine I had to stop everythging for 24 hours,,Well I think its more like 12 hours but they say longer to be safe,Cus if you take it with other opioids in your blood it can make you rly sick,So that was like a test of will but in a way it was Easy bc i was thinking This is just temporary nd then tomoz am on that NHS script nd we eating good Thats 1 thing all withdrawals are ultimately Mental not all but A LOT when i first ever had withdrawals frm heroin i was so naive that I didnt even connect why that was happening.So I imagined it was just a really bad cold.Nd because of that.It wasnt hard to get over it.It was horrendous but i jst sat on the sofa for however many days treating it like you would treat a cold.Like bad but you know it will end.For some reason,, Once you know what it is,Because you know what the cure would be nd how easy it would be,It becomes so much harder to just stop. Thats all mental. But once i sat down with that doctor Nd i was sweating nd my eyes was runny,,Even though i was in a way excited cus i did imagine at the time I was seriously turning my life around with this,,Which didnt turn out to be quite true but i really believed that in the moment. But as well Just having this doctor guy sitting with me Nd knowing full well whats going on I felt so pathetic nd ashamed to even be there But when it started kicking in it was really nice. But that feeling nvr really goes away Because even though the ppl that do jobs like that is all rly nice ppl usually They were nice to me nd the psychiatrist n pharmacist was nice nd There was 1 arsehole but that was rare,,But you know they at the end of the day View you as basically a criminal nd they dont fully trust you to be even human.....Its very sad addiction is such a waste of life

>>82100994
What happened? I've been away for a week, so don't know what's gone on.

>>82101010
Shippy is gone.

Its very true about learned helplessness As well. Once u clock that everyone sees you that way regardless then you dont see the point in proving them wrong.

>>82100982
god damn this just gets worse. you sound like a good pal and fuck the seethers. but yeah i've known addicts who just start nicking things and it sucks because that's all hobby stuff that clearly means something to you (as opposed to just pinching money or whatever)

hope you can get it sorted. in a flatshare i took a photo of my room and all the valuable stuff, sent a mate a text of it all saying "zero intention of selling/getting rid of any of this" just so i had that in writing.

even if it's not the police could you refer him somewhere, or get him to go to a meeting, or even just sit with him a few days and get him through withdrawals? maybe ring the local addictions service and see what they say?

>>82101010
a week? wtf for, think youre better than us yeah? forget all about us yeah, youre all the fucking same

cigarillos > cigarettes
>cheaper
>sold in packs of 10
>packaging isn't the colour of an indian's skin
>longer smoke
>higher quality tobacco
>allowed to have flavourings

>>82101032
clearly the sort of person who says they're quitting /britfeel/ forever and then DOESN'T come back two days later.

>>82101014
>not saying that ship has sailed

>>82100982
You know how it is lad you've been there yourself. Addicts will do whatever it takes to get their fix. Sorry tho, that's proper shit. Would maybe look at getting your locks changed.

Massive fan of the new Facebook AI which takes everything equally seriously. Haven't chuckled like this is in a while

Hope r helper takes piccy of red panda @flemingo land

>>82101010
Shippy got exposed as a paedophile and he fucked off

Really glad I never tried crack or smack. I've done some terminally retarded things in my life, but those were 2 I wouldn't touch because I knew, in any state of mind, that my life would be over and I'd likely die within 2 years if I touched those 2 drugs. Fucked myself up bad enough with the drink, coke and pills, barely made it through that alive.

>>82101081
Maybe the real belly buster challenge was the post

>>82101081
does it just generally assume 'challenge' = 'possibly dangerous' because of daft TikTok/whatever challenges?

Looks like docuberg wiki is in its final death throes right now

No nu changes since mid-june (!) and the "new pages" site's completely blank. Sad!

Tfw you seethe so much and then just kinda run out of energy and don't care anymore. Pretty good thing actually. Exhausted. Lush.

done coke and it was shit, tried ket and thought it was meh, weedle deedle dee is fun but only fat doinks with mates, eaten liberty caps quite a few times and thats a fucking nutty substance, ate a heroic dose and fully died in my mind and forgot I even existed as a human at all and just minced about in this mental 4d technicolor dimension for what felt like eons but time didn't exist there and there were interesting energy beings to interact with. Madness. Fell too deep into it and came across these geometric insects which sort of resembled predator who followed me back out.

>>82101163
scare of drugs now. I've recognised my mental state is so fragile, they would probably send me into full blown schizophrenia.

>>82101141
DocuWiki? oh man that's sad.
really don't get why the actual producers don't just dump these documentaries online for free, YouTube or somewhere. a lot of them aren't even on DVD/streaming, it's just "some programme that was on in 2006" (and i want to watch it, damn it)

they still posting releases on the forums, at least?

These old comments are pretty laff ngl;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2RtbP1d7Kg
>Just saw one in my bedroom, third video that I'm watching to understand the enemy i'm facing

Feckin glad i got rid of the damn thing right away

>>82101163
>ate a heroic dose and fully died in my mind and forgot I even existed as a human at all and just minced about in this mental 4d technicolor dimension for what felt like eons but time didn't exist there and there were interesting energy beings to interact with. Madness. Fell too deep into it and came across these geometric insects which sort of resembled predator who followed me back out.
I had a similar experience on DMT. Not fun, at all, thinking you've died.

Here are all the drugs I've done:

Weed (since 14)
Salvia
Coke for quite a long time in my 20s
E
MDMA
Speed
Acid
A random pill I bought off a drag queen
Ket
DMT
Mushies (libs and teachers)
Spice once by accident (was told it was a normal spliff)

>>82101180
I dont touch anything apart from a few beers in a social setting, which seldom happens. Just not really interested anymore, prefer being sober. Not touched shrooms since, when you have a proper trip its just a tonne of energy with the weird shit that goes on, during that trip when I was eating handful after handful I go to grab another and the stipes of the shrooms sticking up lunged at my hand and I almost screamed and a bit later I ended up in a time loop where my brain was repeating the same sequence and that was so fucked. Nah no fanks i'll have a flapjack and a cuppa instead.

unironically this close tobecoming a full blown gay.
Women did this to me ;__;

>>82101215
saw one of those in spain, the once. Scary, innit?

>>82101219
why are there weird beings when you trip balls, the one positive from it is that im a lot more comfortable with actually dying, in my mind it felt really real letting go and I was so far gone there was no remembrance of earth, being a person, memories or having any body at all, so freeing.

>>82101249
I think I'd have had a more profound experience had I not sank like, 7 pints before I smoked it. The last thing I remembered was an old pal saying "oh...that was a lot" then blackness, followed by the whole death of the self shit.

When the cats r away,, thee mice shall come out to play

I have maddo dreams, as is desu. Don't think I even need to trip.
Vaguely remember last night I was with some kind of war band marching through a wood, and looking for my trousers that I had discarded for some reason. Saw a big blue snail and a lizard.

>>82101271
ooh ek. Imagine having a cosplay cuddle buddy, and mutual wanking in between gams of Smash Bruds. That's th elife, there.

>>82101249
the 'entities' are spooky and i feel like i only scratched the surface. first time i was just in some abstract room in some 'outer' place that made me think of old 3D renders. think the surface of the infinite planet/whatever might have been machines, but i wasn't 'ready' yet (heard people talk about a 'cosmic waiting room' and i guess it's that)

so yeah did not BREAK THROUGH as they say, but also had that lasting feeling that there's something else, beyond life. kind of scary to my pleb human brain, but overall a good thing. and damn just being pure disconnected from my body, 'going' somewhere, how does that even work? insane

Just want to be alone desu

>>82101286
nah tripping is fucking madness, its like youve fallen into source code. 1 gram of shrooms is very fun though, its relaxing and youre still present but objects begin to almost dance and everything becomes brighter and then towards the end you sort of crash and start thinking about things but with extreme clarity.

one of those nights init

>>82101322
I reckon peak shrooms experience is going out in nature and really fucking seeing reality, yknow? We're all just atoms being expressed differently man.

>>82101373
done that one and its very calming, very meditative and peaceful. Got a jar of them still despite not touching them in a couple of years, they're a very versatile thing, you can do a little bit and have a really fun time, put yourself in different settings for a different feel or just go bonkers and die for a bit. Although the paranoia of public shrooms isn't fun, can easily go a bit sideways bumping into people

Quite sad that shppy has left bc he was nice to me in recent times
If it was in the pre-being nice to me era i would feel differently
Am a simple beast
Dnt know why I trust anybody when they jst leave in the end inevitably

>>82101470
he was a fat nonce cunt

>>82101024
Yeah that's it, all my hobby stuff basically. Mad as the reel I use on the river is fugged, the reel arm was bent, but he may have straightened it, but the bite alarms and receiver weren't working properly. I was thinking of getting new ones, but will see how muh fugged up body is, might have to stop or limit the carp fishing trips. Might also have to find a new fishing spot on the river me and my mate go on, as it's getting harder for me to get to our usual spot.
I mentioned drug centres and that, but it all depends on him wanting to do it. He's not here any more, not sure if I'll see him again, and if he's still on the crack, I won't be letting him in here.
>>82101063
I keep the key in the front door (sideways so nobody can use the lock from the outside).
Not worried about him coming back, but if there's any dealers that now of my house and he owes them money.

Having a meltdown bc my spoon solo was badly received on yohtube

My toxic trait is saying ill jave a early night nd staying up til 8 int he morning

My actual toxic trait is getting angry at yourubers nd having full arguments wiv them in ny head nd thinking I could do a better job kf being a youruber nd tbehre only popular bc they're hot

I need to modify this as the safety feature is knackered and needs to be messed about with before it can be fired.

>>82101684
fav youtubers?

>>82101684
i watch them RedLetterMedia lads discuss old films and everyone says it's parasocial, a friend simulator, whatever
but yes i AM in the room and also pointing things out and making jokes, they just ignore me which is fine, it's all the videos anyway

>>82101693
This is it with the trigger safety thing (circled) it stops thr trigger somehow when the red thing is pushed in.

>>82101775
Here it is with safety disengaged. Wonder if I could glue the metal bit so it stays up, then I can cock it and fire?

Did my crossbow pistol scare everyone off? DOn't panic, it's not for anything bad, got it because it's cool. I've always wanted a sword as well, desu.

i went to get pizza
oh hey cool
a crossbow pistol

Done MDMA many times and weed but that's it. MDMA always had a great night on it but it's damaged my brain I reckon. I struggle to recall words a lot now. Like short term memory loss or something. Although my long term is fine.

>>82101958
don't do any bad murders.

Me? I've done MDMA many times and weed but that's it. MDMA always had a great night on it but it's damaged my brain I reckon. I struggle to recall words a lot now. Like short term memory loss or something. Although my long term is fine.

Tanked up lids

Me? I've done MDMA many times and weed but that's it. MDMA always had a great night on it but it's damaged my brain I reckon. I struggle to recall words a lot now. Like short term memory loss or something. Although my long term is fine innit.

Whow.............bad trip

Doin MMA on MDMA

I don't think I'm going to be able to find enough decent films for my yearly October horror binge this year, I feel like I've seen most good to decent horror films at this stage.

>>82101702
Mostly christian ones u wouldnt be interested probably
Lately ave been watching videos of roller coasters fr some reason even though am scared of them like morbid curiousity

>>82102111
Have u seen the Witch 2015
Its my fav

>>82102123
Yeah, it's a great film, I really like all of Robert Egger's stuff

I also have this. Sold as a laser pointer, but this burns stuff if the batteries are charged fully. Can't hold the beam on my hand longer than 5 seconds, it really hurts. Also need to wear glasses when using it, as it's bright af.
>>82102016
Only good one's, I promise.

why do you have all this kit?

How do I know if the socially awkward girl I'm dating is bad at conversation or if she just really hates me?

Ponce is Shippyz bum boy

>>82102111
Suspiria. The original.

>>82102164
Just stuff I think is cool. Been round air guns since teenage years, and have 1, and an air pistol. Crossbow pistol was because it's cool, and can also be a good deterrent if needed.The laser pointer was a lucky buy. I'd bought a laser pen that said it went a mile.Then my mate bought one and claimned it went 2 miles, so I found a cheap one that said 5miles, and that's the burny one. I also have a gasmask here and filter, and did have an old (from90's) NBC kit. I got that during covid for some bants, as my mum "had" covid but also went shopping and bought me some things each weekend, so one of the times when she was ill, I opened my door dressed in full suit with gas mask on, and got the shopping from her. I did have a photo on an old phone, but that's unusable now.

I am a weird pervert, and to be honest it involves children. I am not a nonce though

>>82102308
you shag/wank to single mothers? you need to KNOW they have kids?

https://youtu.be/o7a3bzOQL5U

>>82102365
that is 2spooky

>>82102365
duende moment

>>82102430
There is this 1 where its suppoed to look like gnomes https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly-Hopkinsville_encounter

>up since 06:28
>cooked sausage and egg mcmuffers for dinner
>pregab at 15:30
>fun till now
Think it's aboot time I went to bed ay. Had my bedtime spliff, I'm off for a plug of maple syrup, going for a wank then going to sleep.

Luvly bit of rain outside
>>82102470
Night nightx

>>>/x/40813335 Certain events........
they have occured.........x

Everyfing set in motion all those yrs ago is coming to pass.The eleventh seal is broken.x

Looking for gay male flatmate in Banbury

Corr what an experience. Imma feel roughington tomorrow. Still alive at least and didn't send any messages to my smackhead mates. Still keeping to own lane in life x

No mental energy to improve. Even if I did improve, I'd only at best get lucky competing with immigrants to get some shitty deadend job. Women will date better. There are more people than jobs so I'd probably get nothing anyway.

>>82102746
Know where u stand now x

Hashbrownx

Imagine being Will and having lots of sex with Ruth.

Sometimes it really does feel like the system is against me.

>go in shop
>cashier is male
>hands me my 57p in change
>tell him put that in your tip box mate
>thank him for his service and take my food gracefully
>go in another shop
>cashier is foid
>make sure the foid gives me my 3p in change and a worthless receipt
>never say a word and snatch my food/change aggressively from the foid's hands

>>82103103
Not a drop of pussy for men like you. What do you have to offer?

>>82103110
>keep the change, citizen *doffs hat
love a nit of nobless oblige, me. well fancy

I've yet to have sex. I doubt I'll ever get sex so fuck being a wagie. There's no point working if you're not able to enjoy life. You'd only be paying taxes towards females anyway and the types of jobs you'd do (if you're even given that privilege in this fucked up overpopulated immigrant-invaded country that keeps waves low) will be the reason why females have such easy lifestyles. The only way to fight back is to not play the wagie game.

should i buy a doffable hat? Should i start wearing a straw boater?

Can't be assed w/anything right now me

Holy fuck lol

>>82103180
You should just go lay down and hold your hand up to the stars and grab at them. Girls love guys who have strong imaginative brains

Fuck Ofcom tyrants. I will never work.

>>82103120

>Not a drop of pussy for men like you.

Yeah, because that's how society has been designed.

fulla farts lately chaps.

just want to win the lottery so i can play slot machines all the time without being worried about how much im losing

>>82103241
I recently won a couple thousand from gambling. Its just a numbers game, if you lose a lot youll eventually win it all back. Try to flip a coin, youll see you almost never go more than 3 times without calling the side. Its free money becuz the casino hopes you stop playing after you lose. You just need to double down and keep going. Take out a loan, borrow from your family if you have to. Because you are about to win big, and then youll be spending your time on the beach with naked girls who love your jackpot on their tits and butt.

>>82103283
spending my time on the beach with naked girl does sound pretty good desu, especially if they have slot machines there

>>82102365
>aliens finally make contact and come to earth
>they land in glasgow

Feelin quite down lately
Not meowuch eye can do ahout it than keep moving

This thread has become even more shit and boring these past few weeks.

What a sad existence.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/1mjc33g/how_do_i_turn_my_life_around/

>>82103385
That's just me, except I'm several years older than that.

Me? It's definitely too late. I won't be able to have those experiences now. I'll just ride out the neet life for as long as possible ans then kill myself.

Back on the strawbs tonight

>>82103385
>Every reddit retard responding "dude, go for a le walk every day!"
Yeah, that's basic exercise. You should do that anyway. That's not going to turn your life around in the slightest.
I hate them so much it's unreal.

gonna jump in bed and watch some "stop a douchebag" videos i think

>>82102908
Love this image. Thank you for sharing it with us.

>>82103556
We all hash brown x

I wear earplugs to sleep.
I also use snus pouches.
Just woke up with an earplug in my mouth like a snus pouch...
ffs

>>82103777
Went to bed at 9 because I was really tired and woke up at 2am. Grim. Might try and go back to sleep soon.

>>82103786
I went early as well, 10 ish, so i've had 6 hours, 5 hours is my cutoff for staying awake, so that's it for me, i'm up now probably.
Was desperate for something sugary as well, had a battenburg slice.
Just go when you feel like it, i can sleep during the day for an hour or two, do you?

MaKE me a cuppa u fxing incel freak!!!!!!!!! "whats the magic word"........................................please.............................*sound of kettle boiling*

My sisters boyfriend woudl have known am an NEET loser with no job when we met
Am a embarrassment nd a burden.It sad.It not nice.She cant be proud of me.Its better if am dead.

>>82103814
Yes I have been doing for years now. I am naturally tired due to my illnesses and medication so I have to have cat naps throughout the day. Probably 2-3 hours sleep in the afternoon.

Thinkjnt about how ave ruined my mmys life for being born

>>82104117
very torn about feeling bad for what I do to my parents and feeling like "what did they expect though?".
Very obvious someone just needed to get me a job when I was like 16, and to aggressively push me to socialise when I was younger than that. The cracks were showing very early, and my family's response has generally been avoidance or support of malignant behaviour.

I have failed at my job as brother nd as son to be somebody they can be proud of.It tragedy.x

I cant drive a car
I dnt know how2 get a job
All i can do is meow

>>82104056
I went to lay down, thought i'd drop off but brain is too asctive and the seagulls have woken up :/

Every wee sister in the world wantsa big brother that ppl in skewl thinks hes a kewl guy nd tall,,Good at football,knows the score about life
Not like when we were in skewl it was like Oh thats ur brother The complete spastic mongoloid guy? Oh really? Oh wow ok
Its a shame for her
I nvr ask to be born but neither did she nd she didnt ask for me to be born either
I failed in my missions of life
MY life on this earth is like a special needs baby that needs a bottle
Thats not something that any1 would ask for if they had a choice
Nd no wonder she went aff the rails a bit when we were teenagers probly jst looking for somebody to look up to since thts obviously cant be me Nd i even had the cheek To tell her off about it nd I was saying Why r you drinking alcohol now Whats that all about sort urself out AS IF AM NOT A DRUNK MYSELF!!!!!!!! So what would you expect
Why did i hv to turn out like this.I wish i was soemething better so that ppl i love could be happy.x

Makes me feel guitly that ppl are ever nice to me in the 1st place

l sleep x

I relapse in nicotines bc am sad. Am gna cry. I emailed support lassie nd explaind my depressed feelings.

Crying x igo to bed now

Gna go sybau monk mode frm tomoz n stoicmaxx

I need jesus x pls let this be tbe month I quit my addictionsx

Jesus here, you can do it my friend!

Ok let's stop horsing around its bright outside now. Time4 my neetnap x

>>82103283
wollocks are tingling at this post

night night crossy lid x

Imagine being support lassie and waking up every morning to another unintelligible chapter and verse email from yet another manchild spacker. I'd be howling. What a great job that would be.

hair lassie told me Airbnb are giving free accommodation to IDF soldiers

SSM Live!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aasBju4hAcQ

>>82105300
Phwoarrr every day he live's a great day for me my leeeed

Just woke up, thinking about about britfeel dollies

>>82105300
>removed by uploader
I'll never understand why he does this

>doing parcel deliveries
>get my first 2 ratings
>5 stars
>4 stars
>4
Why man like what did I do wrong how I get that extra star
Supposed to have 4.8+ rating as well and now I've only got 4.5

>>82105430
Some people have the mindset that 5 stars is reserved for service that goes above and beyond. You can do absolutely everything right but if there isn't that special something you just can't earn 5 stars. Maybe think about upping your game a little, lad?

>>82105435
I'll try saying have a nice day

>>82105430
If you learnt to use linux you could've been a sysadmin rather than some minimum wage delivery driver

>>82105435
I'll try sucking their cocks

>>82105462
sysadmins haven't been a thing for decades lad. It's called devops now. You're also projecting because I'm just doing this to get out the house and work on my anxiety, I won't mention what I normally do because you'll only seethe.

Dividend lad here. My Harbour Energy shares that I mentioned last week jumped up 14% this morning and I've sold the lot. Think it's caused by dividend declaration/ex-dividend date being this week. They'll most likely tank again soon after. 30 quid profit on my 125 pound investment. Not too shabby for a bit of fun.

>>82105404
Where Shippy
Where Nubs
Where BritNormie
Where Cola
Need an update on HHLs wollocks
Where Chika
Where Lollers
Where Footlad
Where Eva
Where Ruthmong
Where Auditmong
Where Nightwalkmong

>>82105473
I'm just teasing you, lad. I respect you for working on your anxiety; I have anxiety myself, but it only occurs in very specific situations so it's difficult to work on it/overcome it. Don't want medication for it though, that stuff fries your brain. Good luck x

>>82105478
>Where Shippy
Exposed as a nonce (again) and left or permabanned
>Where Nubs
Never liked her
>Where BritNormie
On the nonce discord
>Where Cola
Irrelevant
>Need an update on HHLs wollocks
Done in
>Where Chika
At work probably being forced to do unethical tasks
>Where Lollers
Hanging around a children's playground
>Where Footlad
At work so he can pay his mother the 750 pounds a month to live in his childhood boxroom
>Where Eva
retireded nonce nest character
>Where Ruthmong
In his boxroom
>Where Auditmong
See above
>Where Nightwalkmong
See above

>>82105430
I hope your performance isn't judged on stars alone. Some people will give you a 1-star rate because they're pissed off they burned their pancakes that morning. Or they're not happy with the product and in their tard brain it means they give the delivery a low rating. It's fucked.

wonder whats shippy rating as a chauffeur in london

>>82105489
Thanks lad. It's also to work on not getting stressed when driving
>>82105544
Nah it goes off a few things, meeting the ETAs and that
>they're not happy with the product
Actually saw that on the group chat, someone got 1 star and the comment was about the contents of the package, not the drivers fault that the customer ordered the wrong thing

I have a sneaking suspicion that nightwalkmong is also tiledgardenjeanssoilbagmong

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXnqZo03PHY
banger desu

How do I cope with the fact that I've never been desired or seduced by a woman, lads? Not *REALLY*. I've had sex and it's been... fine. But it's clear that they weren't really craving me, you know? No woman has ever tried to be sexy for me. I get the sense that their thought process was more like
>Hmm, do I wanna shag tonight? Well sure yeah I guess. Him? Meh, he'll do...

>>82103428
Yeah I'm several years older too. Kinda sad really.

>>82103506
Going for a walk and some guy saying get to the library to read a book. They also presume you can just get therapy instantly too on the nhs.

Interesting article;
https://www.horseandhound.co.uk/features/horse-urine-2-533727

>>82105663
Think of the 25-50yo incels here. Life isn't so bad.

Workberg announced a restructing de lids. Might finally get a big bag of money to fuck off.

>>82105814
Corrrr restructuring even. Got so giddy I forgot how to type didn't I.

Stink booty girls
I'm gonna keep on farting with my stink booty girls
Stink booty girls

Am ill af in beddingtons me. Somehow fucked one of me fingernails as well so it's sore af. It not right. Defo keeping off the drink for a while after today. Life's better without it.

Do you think Will has kissed her several times this week? I bet she must love his aftershave.

>>82105814
You'll be given at most 10k and be entering the worst job market in history. Good luck mate.

British birds with brachydactyly type d.

>>82105855
>Life's better without it.
It isn't

>>82105891
I'll get 35k (20 after tax) and leave the finance industry to become my own boss. Cannae wait.

>>82105876
I'm sure he has done more than just kiss her.

>>82105891
Really is no point bothering for us long-term neets. Even if we all got lucky with some deadend job, it would still be a red flag to women at our age (being in an unskilled job as a man means you are boring, have no ambition and also no money to maintain her love). I really wouldn't want to work to support women through taxation and not get any.

>>82105910
20k is nice and all, but really it's not anywhere near clean break money. I also don't think you understand just how fucked the economy is right now. It's all hanging on by a thread. No dynamism, everything over-regulated, hiring is absurd, taxes high. We're fucked. I wish you the best of luck, but I don't think getting fired with a lump sum is the golden ticket it used to be.

>>82105917
Can't argue with this tbqhwyf.

>>82105916
I'm sure he's enjoyed her tuppence several times now but he will jump ship when some other girl shows interest.

>>82105926
I get what you're saying and you're right for people with zero savings, but I've got a very decent nest egg and really the only reason I'm waiting for redundancy and not just quitting outright is because I refuse to do these twats the favour of getting rid of me for free.

>>82105917
Wont get anywhere in life with an attitude like this

>>82105876
>when you marry do you have to kiss the girl?
that's what my 5 year old asked me this week, you're literally at that level of understanding of relationships.

>>82105855
>Am ill af in beddingtons me. Somehow fucked one of me fingernails as well so it's sore af. It not right. Defo keeping off the drink for a while after today. Life's better without it.
fascinating

Really like this asmr lass. Definitely a british rose...very sweet. Said she is 24 this month so odd to think she is the same age as scottish lass.

I still like her but watching a lass play vidya is boring. That's not asmr to me.

>>82106006
>Really like this asmr lass. Definitely a british rose...very sweet. Said she is 24 this month so odd to think she is the same age as scottish lass.
fascinating

>>82105981
It's sad to think I have less experience than Will. He's probably had like five girlfriends before her too. It's so easy being handsome. :(

>>82106006
She looks underage desu, probably why youre attracted to her.

>>82106025
>I still like her but watching a lass play vidya is boring. That's not asmr to me.
fascinating

>>82106006
she looks 13. didn't know shippy was into that ASMR rubbish

>>82105951
Won't really get anywhere in life being stuck in deadend warehouse jobs (that's if you can even get one of them shit jobs now with high amounts of unskilled immigrants).

Sure I'd have money saved from living with parents but that's just fucking sad still. That extra money would only buy me a few years when it comes to renting a place when the parents are six foot under. Then I'd be better off unemployed, on disability to get me a council/housing association home than work (single income). You need a fixed address to work so the council will be obligated to find me accommodation. Failing that I will go to prison or mental ward.

>>82106041
Well she has a muslim boyfriend. Do you think she has been groomed on online dating?

>>82106056
It's probably her hairline and makeup that makes her look like that. Every one thought R was younger but she was 18.

>We have detained the first illegal migrants under our new deal before returning them to France.

>No gimmicks, just results. If you break the law to enter this country, you will face being sent back.

>When I say I will stop at nothing to secure our borders, I mean it.
https://xcancel.com/Keir_Starmer/status/1953362218327662620

>>82106087
>>When I say I will stop at nothing to secure our borders, I mean it.
Until he u-turns for the 50th time. The man holds no credibility or authority.

I don't care if she isn't curvy. To me she seems like a nice lass. There are guys my age dating 23yo girls.

>>82106087
Didn't they cap this at 50 per week? We'll 'stop at nothing' except a made up limit nowhere near the required amount.

>tfw you will never go on a day out with a lass to the york railway museum

she said it was free entry too.

Leonardo DiCaprio is like 20 years older than me dating twenty year olds.

>>82106148
Pop a wig on and he might date you

It's normal to like 23 year old females that take care of themselves. Having curves is just a bonus.

ruthmong on a mad one this morning

>>82106159
Nah I wouldn't date him. I would want his life though.

>tfw no money to travel to free museums

even if I did it would be socially unacceptable to go on your own. you have to be with someone just like the cinema. it's awkward otherwise and people think you are up to something.

>>82097341 (OP)
How do I deal with the embarrassment of being on bennies and being 33 living with the mummy and daddy still? I pretty much hide from society. An electrician had to come in my today and I had to hide all my anime figurines out of embarrassment.

Nice little 11 hour nap.
Tiime for choons, oh yeah.
This one goes out to my fren that sold all muh stuff. Cheers bruv.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1r-bWx3WZfQ
>>82106148
My mate is 43 and engaged to a 28 year old. He started seeing her when she was 25.

>>82106178
Stop giving a shit.

>>82106187
>Stop giving a shit.
Its difficult because everyone expects you at this age to have a mortgage, a nice car, a wife, kids, a good career etc.

>>82106178
The worst thing is when mummy keeps saying she needs the windows replaced. That takes ages and there is no where for me to go as they will do all of them in every room. I hate the stress this causes me. If I stay home, I would have to engage with them at some point. They'd ask me what I do for a living. They'd never believe I am socially anxious and think I'm just lazy playing video games...a loser.

>>82106203
>They'd ask me what I do for a living
not like you have to tell them the truth

I won't be telling you much else about me new R. She is perfect. My life would be so much better with her.

Girls like her shouldn't be dating muslims. They're obviously masters at love bombing white girls that seem inexperienced.

>>82106203
>They'd never believe I am socially anxious and think I'm just lazy playing video games...a loser.
True that people straight up judge you regardless and it gets worse with age. Not got a job at 18? You'll find your place. Not got a job in your 30s? Wtf you retarded loser.

>>82106178
I just say there are more people than unskilled jobs but my mum doesn't believe it. She thinks there are actually jobs out there when the local Aldi has a hiring notice on the window. She has no idea hundreds of people will have applied for a role like that. She's so stuck in the 70s.

>>82106195
Not him but, we're told (as good consoomers) that we need a job (to buy things TAXTAXTAX), we need a house with a mortgage, a car (need insurance as well). Wife and kids (that's your choice, nobody else's), career (get a job, spend more money ECONOMYECONOMYECONMY).
That anon is correct. Fuck them and their society.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwFjw7uzrUo

>>82106195
Yeah but who gives a shit what they think?
You're your own person.

>>82106226
I wish I could be a narcissist and just blatantly say having a job gets me nowhere in life. Besides my carbon footprint is low... I'm not having sprogs so the state won't have much to pay compared to a single mum with sprogs.

The worst thing is when you don't care about your looks or hygiene but because someone is coming round to fix something for mummy you feel like you have to look good.

Ruth is not as cute as this older lass.

>>82103385
>Start small. (1) Stick to a simple healthy daily routine (sensible sleep/wake times). (2) Regular physical activity eg gym. (3) Go to the nearest 'park run' location and do the run one Saturday morning.

Done all this for a long time, also the other "touch grass" tier comments and I'm still a loner incel, its like these reddit neurotypicals can't fathom how it really is

Washing your hair for the first time this year and all dried blood comes out from the months of scalp picking and constantly getting ingrown hairs.

Not a big fan of Ruthmong me personally

>>82106253
It's really dire if 1) you aren't that handsome 2) you have lost all confidence from years of bullying 3) having poor social skills and unable to convince employers you are capable of working.

The worst part is society sees you as scum so you start becoming a nasty person as you age.

>>82106203
I also think you are a loser

>>82106266
His new asmr bints are rather cute.

Go on nightwalk, stay in forest somewhere when it gets to day, have lots of podcasts downloaded to listen to up the tree as you wait for tradie to do his work. Then come back home when it's dark again.

>>82106269
You were always a nasty person though, even as a child. You told one of your classmates that you wanted her dad to die

>>82106269
There is a "ceiling" to my "masking" ability. People at these places might say hello to me but anything beyond that they start treating me different to how they talk to others, like i'm a different species, I've tried saying different things etc but the outcome is always the same, at worse they look at me like i'm some massive weirdo at best they give some sympathetic response and walk off.

I don't think i'm ugly really, I worked on personal grooming too and put some effort into dressing better, it works on first impressions but falls apart swiftly after.

I tried the volunteering route to get a job and pretty much got bullied and humilated out of it so gave up, the only thing I could possibly do is stuff I can create on my own but motivation is hard to come by without a rigid foundation.

>>82105663
It probably is not true lad. Girls do not usually just shag for the sake of it

>>82106286
Yeah she was a bully calling me nasty names and getting ber male friends to flick my ears. Totally fine to do that back.

My plan you ask? Win the euromillions tommorow

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4monrpu06Hs

>>82106299
She was just teasing you a bit and you took it way too far, she probably fancied you, you mongoloid

>go volunteer as bennies allows it
>it's only girls there and they suspect I may only be working for free to be around them
>have to make excuse to manager and say my gran has been rushed back to hospital
>says "come back in a few days then"
>never go back
>jobcentre sanctions me
>reapply for bennies a few months later

can't be dealing with that shit anymore.

>>82106300
im winning set for life tonight

Why won't Ruthmong admit that he's a paedophile?

There was this girl in my year who used to give me "nipple twists" which hurt like fuck, everyone found it "funny", She'd grab my nipples and twist, also she threw a wet tampon at my back in year 7.

She turned into an horrifically grim single mother slag to nobodies surprise

>>82106325
They are over the age of consent or even in their twenties.

>>82106327
Did you have the obligatory loud girl who would flash her tits occasionally when the teacher turned around writing something on the white board?

There's nothing wrong with liking a young looking adult woman.

>fat dada

>>82106338
Don't think anyone flashed their tits but this was one of the "loud" girls, in fact they were all grim, there was two pregnancies in my classes alone in year 10 and 11

There is nothing wrong with being a grim 33 year old goblin who window fitters laugh at

I'd drop everything to be with this cute lass to be honest. If only it were that simple.

I wish I could be 22 again and go on one last date with my ex-gf Helen. I remember kissing her, making her laugh, making her cum over and over again. I wonder if I could ever be that carefree and happy again

>oi lorry anon, do you want to start 2 hours earlier than usual on thursday?
>no
>ok we'll start you 2 hours earlier on thursday, youre welcome
fuck off

>>82106375
>drop everything

You would drop it all?! All of the stuff going on in your life?!

>>82106375
Would you buy shoes to be with that cute lass?

>girl at work leans over from behind quite close as you are sitting down
>her hair touches you, you can smell her nice feminine scent
>asks me can you change your holiday as I need to go back to poland that day
>this was on the day gears of war 3 was coming out

Hate it when girls give you a little bit of attention just for their own gains. Told her no and suddenly she went from warm to cold.

>>82106385
>>82106392
Don't bully Ruthmong

>mum, put some extra turkey dinosaurs on tonight, ive got a GIRL coming over

>>82106385
There's not much going on in my life. I'd drop this place, I'd not play video games at this point.

>>82106392
Definitely. If I knew buying nice clothes, getting a haircut, shoes and keeping up hygiene is all it takes...then yes. Love is much more than that. I'd struggle to financially support her.

>tfw playing gears of war 3 on my holiday and the girl probably had to take unpaid leave

I still think about that moment. I really didn't care too much for the game to be honest as the formula of crouch and shoot was getting old to me.

>>82106376
idk lad, i had a chance to re-live a memory with an ex once and it just made me even more depressed

>>82106417
If you refuse to do that for yourself, you must really disrespect yourself

I liked the poll option on sharty

>>82106441
I'm just too depressed and mentally exhausted all the time.

make new edish for me please

>>82106434
Yeah? I am not really surprised. You can never really go backwards. What happened?

>>82106453
Why would any woman respect you?

>>82106178
I work in trade and guarantee that they would definitely consider you a total loser for the stuff you listed. Probably more so the anime figures desu. Good call to hide them

New thread my laddingbergs

>>82106492
>>82106492
>>82106492
>>82106492

>>82106493
I was making one, but got the old timeout warning, I still have 3 min to wait, kek.
Cheers lad.