Thread 82287745

>For five years of my life since covid from 22 to 27 I've been 300lbs, single, miserable and suicidal
>I go back home for Christmas and the disgust from my father at what I've become is palpable and he makes it known, so I go home and work my ass off to change so I can make him proud of me
>"Anon, how could you ever expect anyone to want you in your current state?"
>I start eating once a day, 1200 calories at 300lbs 6'0
>it works, I run every day on a treadmill I bought online because its winter
>My upstairs neighbor complains and tries to file a complaint but I move the treadmill away from the wall which stops it from shaking his apartment and the landlord sides with me.
>The treadmill has bluetooth speakers that my neighbor connects to and he plays porn on the speakers while I run. Ripping out the speakers voids the warranty so I just deal with it.
>Treadmill breaks around march because im such a fat fuck
>Start running outside and jumping rope
>Get promoted at work
>Lose 130 pounds, make it to my goal weight of 175lbs by August 1st.
>hop on a dating app
>Meet a cute girl
>Shes perfect
>Funny
>laughs at all my jokes
>always has something to talk about
>Shes trying to become a doctor, a psychologist
>doesnt mind that I have Autism.
>She crochets. She talks about her books. >She bakes. She likes anime.
>I take her to sushi, and on our first date she comes into my apartment while I put the leftovers away because she "wants to see how I live." She calls my apartment cute. I worked hard to clean it the weekend before just in case she wanted to come in, and she did.
>She goes on a walk with me on a nature trail, hugs me, and goes home.
>A week later we see a movie at the theater.
>She takes me out to dinner and we get ice cream. She paid for it all.
>Some homeless guy starts making fun of the way I talk while we walk, we laugh about it.
>Its the first time someones made fun of me and I didn't care.
>I ask if she wants to hear me play guitar sometime

>>82287745 (OP)
>"I'd like that anon, how about tonight?"
>She comes over
>I play david bowie songs for her
>She loved it
>She kisses me
>I have sex for the first time in 5 years
>The sex was amazing, she had to ask me if she was too loud.
>She says she has to go since shes got work in the morning, she calls an uber and holds onto my arm outside the apartment while we wait for it
>She kisses me goodbye and goes home
>She invites me to the gym that Friday
>She puts me through a leg day
>after thats over she invites me to her house for dinner
>she bakes me banana bread and picks me vegetables from her garden

>We shower together to clean up after the gym, nothing sexual happens in the shower
>We watch Ghibli movies in bed together until 1am, I spoon up to her and try to sleep, nothing sexual happens.
>At 2am she leaves the bed which wakes me up. She says her ankle hurts and shes getting tylenol
>She never comes back to bed
>I leave the bedroom and find her on the couch, ask her whats up
>She says she'll be back when shes tired
"ok..."
>I go back to bed
>I cant stop worrying, I have a panic attack in bed alone, but I dont say anything or make noise I just lay there quietly.
>I think about asking her again but I decide to cope myself into thinking she'll come back to bed soon.
>She doesnt. My eyes start watering so I go to sleep.
>I wake up and shes still on the couch.
>I ask her why she didnt come back, she says she "must have passed out"
>I ask her if she wants to get breakfast with me
>she says no
>I get my stuff
>She starts talking to me again about what my plans are for the day. It seems normal. It made me feel at ease.
>I get to the door
>She kisses me goodbye, twice.

>>82287745 (OP)
>>The treadmill has bluetooth speakers that my neighbor connects to and he plays porn on the speakers while I run. Ripping out the speakers voids the warranty so I just deal with it.
fucking lol

>>82287745 (OP)
>30 minutes later im eating my breakfast and I get a text from her saying I was "sexually pushy" last night. I had gotten an erection in my sleep. she says that I didn't abuse her or do anything wrong, but I "reminded her of an abusive ex"
>Says she doesnt want to see me anymore
>I apologize and ask her if we can still see eachother, that I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it.,
>She blocks me on everything
>I throw the banana bread and cucumbers she packed me into the lake my city is on.
>I try to sleep at home but I cant
>I cant sleep at all
>Im spiraling and I dont know what I did, I feel like a monster
>I go back to her apartment like an insane person and ring her buzzer, practically begging her to talk things out with me
>She texts me that I didnt mean anything to her and that I can't handle rejection.
>She threatens to call the police on me if I dont leave. She tells me to see a therapist.
>I see the apartment doors you normally need a key FOB for are propped open with a wet floor sign. I think about walking up to her apartment and knocking on the door. I come to my senses and decide against going inside and I call an uber home. I lose her number.
>I call my psychotherapist
>I say I want to kill myself.
>She calls the police.
>They take me to the hospital, into a psych ward. I speak to a social worker, but a cop was listening behind the door.
>cop accuses me of lying
>starts asking me why I seem nervous
>starts interrogating me about this woman
>I panic and give him her information
>he said he wouldnt contact her, but im such a fucking moron for believing that. He absolutely did.
>he made me feel guilty
>he said I was hiding the full story, im not, I fucking swear on my fathers life im not

>>82287777
>I cant stop thinking that everyone in my city knows im insane.
>I want to kill myself but I cant tell anyone or I'll be thrown in a padded cell again.
>they referred me to psychologists to get medicated.
>I'm scared that the girl will work at the place that I was referred to
>I call my Dad
>he calms me down. Says hes proud of the work I've done this year.
>I still feel like I fucked up my one chance at getting out of this shitpit lonely life.

I love you Dad.

@grok summarize this shit. brb copy pasting this intogrok to summarize this light novel

>>82287745 (OP)
MY LEGS STILL HURT FROM THE LEG DAY

ahh, thank you gemini. grok refuse to do it because it had self harm

Of course. Here is a summary of the main points:

-Self-Improvement: Motivated by his father's disapproval, a man transforms his life by losing 130 pounds and advancing his career.

-Brief Happiness: He meets a woman who seems perfect, and they start a fast-moving, wonderful relationship, giving him his first real hope in years.

-Sudden Rejection: The relationship abruptly ends after she is triggered by something he did unconsciously in his sleep, which reminded her of a past trauma.

-Mental Collapse: His desperate reaction to the breakup leads to a mental health crisis, a brief stay in a psych ward, and profound feelings of shame and isolation. The story ends with him feeling suicidal, with his only comfort being that his father is finally proud of him.

>>82287816
thanks guy preciate it didnt think to ai

>>82287745 (OP)
>>82287760
>>82287777 <--Great quads of luck!
>>82287793

Well look on the bright side, at least you're not a fat fuck anymore. That bitch who dumped you sounds like a mental case, but SPOILER ALERT: All women are mental cases.

It's taken me a lifetime to figure this out OP, but all women are generally awful human beings. I know, I know, everybody says that all the time on this board. But usually on this board you're hearing it from khhv zoomers who hate women because no woman has ever touched them. The REAL blackpill is that even if you're Chad, women are completely irrational beings who are self-centered in a way that men simply can't comprehend. They do the most mean-spirited, selfish things and ALWAYS justify it to themselves by somehow finding a way to blame it on whatever man they're with. If you're not constantly showering them with praise and attention then you're "cold and unfeeling". If you ARE showering them with praise and affection then you're "smothering" them. The truth is no man should ever expect that finding a woman will bring them happiness. The ancients knew this, that's why any civilization that got past the stone age strictly curtailed the "rights" of women. Left to their own devices women will destroy everything around them, from their own families all the way up to Western Civilization.

So forget this bitch and take pride in your own achievements. You lost 130 lbs, not many people are capable of that. You actually got a match on a dating app that led to sex, again not many people manage that. If you got one girl off that you can get another. Just don't take it so hard the next time you realize the girl you hooked up with is a crazy bitch, because as I said earlier, they're ALL crazy bitches.

>>82288117
thats very helpful thank you, I just feel like I stooped to that level myself and I dislike that I did that. I'm 27 and should have handled it better

>>82288146
>I'm 27 and should have handled it better
Don't beat yourself up about it OP, we all make mistakes right? And you did the right thing. You DIDN'T go up to her apartment and you DID get rid of her number. You were right to call your psychotherapist when you were having your crisis. Sounds like some cop was being a dickhead to you, but cops are dickheads, what else is new?

So basically you handled this about as well as it could go, considering the circumstances. Now it's time to put it behind you and move on. A year from now you can laugh about it with your buddies.

>>82288302
reading that has really grounded me and I dont know how to tell you how much I appreciate it. Thank you.