I feel you. At some point I stopped getting excited about plans coming up, a new video game or movie being released, vacations, xmas, summer...
Now there's two categories for me, things that will make me worry and things that will not. I try to dodge as much responsibilites and problems as I can.

https://youtu.be/bjB8OPHtUAY?si=agR9eXzllgOYMQQR

sad, this world wasnt made for us

What are you supposed to do when you know working at your current company has killed any interest you had in programming and know leaving is your best bet yet in order to do so you need motivation, discipline and maybe a touch of passion that is long gone?

Dear A,

The very fact that you thought I was capable of doing something like that, more so, that you were genuinely convinced I did it, makes me sick and I feel deeply insulted.
You were the only friend I thought I could be open with, and you just proved I was wrong.
I hold no grudges against you and I wish you the best, but I won't be able to feel the same way around you ever again.

S