Thread 717729535

Pauline and K Rool fans had their fun, now it's HER turn to be relevant again for current day Nintendo.

make candy kong into an oppai loli and have her ride on marios back the whole game.

Candy is not muscular.

>>717729535 (OP)
Current day Nintendo is literally for women. You are a tone dead retard and probably bought a Switch 2 due to retardation

>>717729535 (OP)
DK is next on the chopping block for friendzoning.

>>717729679
Homosexuals like OP can't get off otherwise

>>717729535 (OP)
Nintendo is too woke for that.

>>717729679
She's an ape, she could lift the average top percentage human male over her head and snap him like toblerone

>>717729881
Bananza already turned him into an ugly basedboy abomination who is just friends with a girl

>>717729912
Anon, I'm sorry. You're gay for taking cock up your ass.

>>717730002
I'm not the one who needs women to have big muscles and draws off model characters with fanfic muscles

>>717729912
what a shocker that she is missing in troonanza lol

>>717729535 (OP)
Candy Kong and Tiny Kong will never return to the franchise they have breasts and those are illegal. The only female characters Nintendo allows to have canon tits are Adult Pauline and Samus. And about Samus? They keep shrinking her tits with each newer Metroid game.

Candy Kong would be flat as sin. I hate modernity the first thing they do to female characters is turn them into mannish trash with small to no tits.

>>717730072
Bananza pretends to be a DKC and Rare loveletter but they omit the fact that Rare games always had charming locker room level sex appeal

>>717729728
>Current day Nintendo is literally for women.

Correct. Modern Nintendo is Disney right down to the theme park.

>>717729535 (OP)
What gameplay role does she serve?

>>717729912
They seriously need to fix that muzzle that looks like Homer Simpson. Also Candy could use a tail.

>>717730251
>They seriously need to fix that muzzle that looks like Homer Simpson.
No they don't need to make animals fuckable for you. The bazookas are played as a gag

>>717730243
For the old games she was the save point. But she got replaced by Wrinkly Kong saving the game during Donkey Kong Country 2 and 3. For DK64 Candy gave each main character their musical attack. After that she was deleted from the games.

>>717729535 (OP)
Didn't they erase candy in DKB for the treehouse localization?

>>717729728
Amazing how Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest are mostly enjoyed by males. But think that Kingdom Hearts is mostly enjoyed by women.

I
WANT
CANDY

>>717730143
>Rare games always had charming locker room level sex appeal
It's always funny to me when people act like rare started on the n64. sure they had shit like battletoads, but they also had stuff like Cobra Triangle, Snake Rattle N Rool, and Solar Jetman which were not very raunchy at all. Although I guess the ass cheeks on their first official game as rare were certainly... something

>>717730143
Lets be blunt Rare's Donkey Kong games quickly eliminated Candy Kong. And lets be blunt Rare often deleted female characters that were sexy in follow up sequels. Rare usually only did one sexy female for one time game appearances. So its a miracle Candy Kong showed up in DK64. As for your example Rare didn't waste time they outright killed off Berri and they did it in the most extreme way they killed her off and then used Breaking The Fourth Wall to explain why she's eternally dead and never returning. What clinched Berri's death is Conker failed and when remade he failed yet again. No future for hot chicks.

>>717730460
I want her to exist in media but to look sexy. And I worry that once Miyamoto dies Nintendo Corporate will go full Family FAGGOT Friendly and start truly destroying the female characters.

I worry whenever Sakamoto dies because if he dies Nintendo will allow Samus to be handled by some Shitty Ugly Jewish Lesbian from America who should have been burned to death in an oven.

>>717730736
Sakamoto and Miyamoto are prime examples of developers that kill their own IP's out of sheer ignorance of what they and the fans want because they lucked out and created 1 or two lighting in a bottles without even meaning to. The second Sakamoto got Metroid back he shat out Other M and the only thing that revived it was him actually listening to the fans and making what was essentially "We're sooorrry: Dread". Miyamoto....people actually believe he made a game past yoshi's island.

>once Miyamoto dies Nintendo Corporate will go full Family FAGGOT Friendly and start truly destroying the female characters.
They do not destroy female characters. They forget about them or turn the men into female characters.

>>717730437
Well it's Jap data. FF is exclusively enjoyed by women and faggots in the West.

>>717730635
I don't even know what your point is. Their big games have sexy bitches, period

>>717729535 (OP)
Why are these monkey feet more attractive than human feet which I find repulsive?

TV is my fav

>>717731246
sakamoto was always just a leech on a preexisting franchise anyway

Poppy makes me feel funny.

>>717731981
coconut cream pies...

>>717731797
You might have a hand fetish, anon.

>>717732093
Him, Miyamoto and even Yamauchi were merely riding off Gunpei's coattails. I can see why people believe he was yakuza'd after he left.

>>717731715
So you are just a mentally ill furry and don't even know what your point is. I see

>>717732557
A game so big it killed the series.

>and don't even know what your point is
Is this the new bot catchphrase?

>>717731981
Candy Kong in the show was so black-coded I'm surprised nobody gets angry about it.

>>717733515
I'm angry all black women don't look like her, and that they owe me sex and hand (foot) jobs.

What's the word for this? They did it to Bo Peep and Amy Rose too.

This is Poochie but for secondary female characters.

>>717733515
>black-coded
I may not have been smart enough to have been born the day before yesterday but at least I was born yesterday and not just now.

>>717733679
pants maxxing.

>>717733679
Toy Story 4 quite literally only exists to shoehorn feminism into Toy Story. 3 had a perfect ending

>>717733515
blacks are fully embracing the ape comparisons now and jews also don't get mad about it in their place. it's weird

>>717733515
light skin, light hair, voiced by a white woman not putting on ebonics. She easily passes for just a vapid dumb blonde.

what are ya buyin

>>717729535 (OP)
OH BANANA!

>>717729965
Why are chimps so much stronger than people despite being smaller?

>>717731981
bottom right bitch got dat aunt viv ass hair

>>717735469
I mean you can't deny science forever.

>>717735967
Sure her fur is lighter, but they got rid of her blonde hair and the style is typical of black women. She's like a light skinned black woman.

>>717737048
it's a teased up pomp. 'flashy' white women in the 80s and into the 90s would have it. Granted it was a little outdated by the time the show aired, but it was made by Canadian boomers so it's expected they'd lag behind culturally.

>>717736062
The key reason for their strength advantage lies in their nervous system. They possess a much higher proportion of fast twitch muscle fibers and have fewer motor neurons, meaning each neuron controls a larger number of muscle fibers. This results in a more "all or nothing" muscle activation where they often use more muscle than necessary for a task, leading to greater raw power. Man in contrast have a surplus of motor neurons allowing for fine motor control and the ability to engage only a few muscle fibers at a time, which is essential for delicate tasks like threading a needle but limits their maximum force output.

>>717736000
made for BWC

>>717738987
>BWC
Myth

>>717736000
>Wamu still hasn't drawn Poppy
What the fuck is happening

>>717739697
you need to speak his name 3 times in the mirror

>>717739697
just generate it instead of waiting around like a cuck

>>717732476
QRD?

>>717739626
*Mythic, legendary even

>>717730460
*chomp*

i wish monkeys were real

>>717729679
Why.
Not.

>>717729679
She might as well be.
OP's picture is still easily at least the 2nd hottest she has been.

>>717729728
Are you a retarded nigger. Only Kirby is for women according to that pic

>>717729992
Kys retarded pedophile.

>>717730160
You lost and got raped rica.

Poppy mogs.

Is this considered furry?

>>717742684
this monkey is black and flat. she's awful.

>>717730072
She's mentioned by name in dialogue, which is more fhan other side characters got.
>>717730143
Ignoring Poppy Kong?

>>717732476
gunpei wasn't really involved with metroid, iirc it was hiroji kiyotake's baby & sakamoto was just part of a team brought on to the project in the last couple months to polish and crunch. super was the first time he had any creative control. his entire career was just riding off of other people's characters, other m was pure undistilled cosmic justice.

>>717742791
I don't care if she's flat, she's delicious.

>>717729535 (OP)
Donkey kong 2: Bazongas

>>717742710
Yes. Embrace your true feelings, anon.

>>717733679
At the very least with Bo, she still loves Woody and they are together again at the end He survived the “no bitches?” mandate that the video game mascots like Mario, Sonic and Crash have all suffered

>>717729912
that's just a hairy woman, atleast the muscle one in OP reads as an animal

>>717742710
I always considered getting off on the animal part to be the distinguishing feature of whether or not you're a furry, wanting to fuck anything with hot tits and an fat ass just makes you a man. Like are you seriously gonna pass up on 80% sexy woman because of the 20% that's a cartoon gorilla? Whatever dude, more for me.

Based Rare

>>717743141
you just knew she wanted the DONG

>>717729535 (OP)
she fucks human men, DK is the furcuck. you can tell.

>>717736062
Humans sacrificed raw strength for dexterity. A lot of our arm muscles are specialized around providing a lot of degrees of freedom in our motions. The muscles for other Apes don't. They are very strong in one specific type of motion... however anything beyond that motion will be very weak or they may not even able to perform it at all. Pure fingers being able to do all these fancy movements means a lot of our hand muscle fibers are reserved for moving the fingers in different directions rather than giving them strength.

I.e. Apes are strong at pushing something, but once they need to pull something in they will fail.

Humans managed to turn this "weakness" into a strength... by inventing weapons which directly scale our dexterity into strength again and in an exponential manner, too.

Someone/-thing who had only strength and zero dexterity couldn't even wield a club, basically.

>>717736062
Chimps are only ~25% stronger than people. They also weight like 90 lbs. Notice how everyone who gets mauled by chimps is a woman lol
Joe Rogan is a retard

>>717748030
Joe Rogan is a retard, but I still would not like to have to fight a chimp unarmed.

>>717729679
She should be.

>>717729912
You're abysmal if you think women should be either anorexic or obese

Poppy sure took a beating.

>>717746784
fucks fat crocodiles*

>>717749430
is this supposed to turn me on?

>>717749561
Maybe.

>>717744741
>pubes on top of fur

>>717749732
Cute butt!

>>717749732
Lipstick ought to be purple

>wake up
>look in the mirror
>see this
what do DMD: no OF

>>717746980
>I.e. Apes are strong at pushing something, but once they need to pull something in they will fail.
Do you think Gorillas will lose if they play the rope game with humans?

>>717729728
Bro where do they get these stats from anyways?? Not just this one but in general. I'm always hearing about stats to various things but not once have I ever been asked to answer any stupid surveys for their stats!! It's freaking weird

>>717729535 (OP)
>>717730143
This character archetype is extinct and never ever coming back.

>>717753395
A shame

>>717729623
>porn addict

>>717729535 (OP)
Is this the place to post hot monkey puss?

>>717730437
KH is a fujo series, always has been

>>717729535 (OP)
she beats shartline by a long shot

>>717729535 (OP)
If you fuck her, would you get HIV?

>>717753395
The faggots and retards in the industry will never squash it out forever.

>>717755815
They will use all their influence and power to eliminate it by any means necessary

>>717730251
They made Dixies muzzle smaller in her redesign, chances are good they'd do the same for Candy.

>>717749732
Sad she’ll be just another FOTM and porn artists will just give her big tits and inflated proportions the few times they draw her.

>>717739865
He saved Nintendo from bankruptcy before they made games and arguably after when he made gameboy the more popular selling product by simply designing it with old technology and to be more energy efficient. It was this and his philosophy of saving money by utilizing the potential of old technology as opposed to new which Nintendo adopted and still stands by to this day. Miyamoto is known for being "the mentor" to some creators, but one must ask who taught the nepo baby such things in the first place? Some people even believe he actually (re)programmed DK singlehandedly when in reality he working with colored pencils and graph paper in the backroom.

Do I blame racists for why monkey-girls aren't more common?
Monkey-people are super neat and deserve to be a common inclusion in games. But they're one of the rarer beastfolk type people for some reason.

Strong, agile, and they've got feet-hands. What's not to love?

>>717741615
She's just not.

>>717755464
Yes

>>717736062
Chimps really aren't THAT strong. Humans can fuck them up, especially with the weight advantage.
Their track record is from the average modern human being sarcopenic meek fatblob, the overwhelming vicious nature of a chimp, and the notable attacks of chimps on humans being primarily the elderly. Every single chimp attack could be effortlessly replicated with an adult human male age 20-30

>>717757636
They're periphery to furries because apes are the closest animals to humans.

>>717748604
It would definitely suck, but as long as you can chimp out harder than they do, and you're not too out of shape, your odds are 80/20 unless they get an unlucky bite or grab on a major artery.

>>717729881
They have been in an actual relationship since the first DKC game. This is written canon.

>>717731681
What I meant to say is Rare had a habit of making one sexy babe for their one shot game and seldom would that sexy character show up in the sequel.

But as mentioned this is an old habit after the Microsoft buyout Rare became proudly homosexual and stopped doing sexual bombshell ladies. Whatever straight employees they used to have in influential positions got replaced by so y boys and shitty women. Tale as old as time for western industries.

>>717744532
Sonic is a bit different compared to Mario and Crash. Sonic outright does not care about pussy due to his immaturity. Sonic has rejected pussy in the OVA and doesn't feel an attraction to Elise that's romantic. Sonic doesn't put any value in romance and sex.

Mario on the other hand obviously has feelings for Peach and got rejected. And Crash? He used to care about Tawna but his brain is so scrambled that his attachment to Tawna or any girl is "crazy" it can go either way.

>>717729728
ff and dq make sense i suppose

>>717735994
Candy and Tiny should have been the shop keepers during Returns and Tropical Freeze. But sadly Retro is full of shitty gays.

I honestly resent how Non Sexy Females the DK franchise has become. Really grown to hate Shitty Female Employees and puritans.

>>717738230
Very cool.

Every monke thread should have monke facts.

>>717746784
Always wanted to see porn of Candy with the human dude from Ape Escape.

>>717749430
DK is not a simp for a vagina. I want DK to beat up Princess Bubblegum and Marceline those shitty dykes from Adventure Time.

>>717756738
That's because there is no focus on storytelling. The reason some female characters blow up in popularity is their storyline. Look at Freya from Final Fantasy 9 her story is tragedy and people feel for the old gal. That leaves an impression. This leads to art.

Poppy doesn't really have this going for her.

>>717729535 (OP)
goddamn those feet are unnerving

Are we all in agreement that aged up Tiny is sexy as hell but that it was retarded from the get go to age her up to begin with?

Do NOT fuck monkeys you retards, that's how fucked up diseases start.

>>717753395
You know what I miss? Long feminine hair in female characters. It's why I always hated Joanna Dark from Perfect Dark with that shitty short dyke hair. Never liked Jill from Resident Evil because of the short dyke hair. I can't stand dyke shit hair. Don't get me started with female characters having long hair and then they dyke it like Bayonetta. I hate short hair.

>>717761996
But anthro women! The only anthro woman I would never accept is Loona from Helluva Boss. Hate that bitch since her job is to happily KILL humans. Don't give me the usual "If you're good Loona won't kill you" she will let her shitty coworkers kill you instead. That anthro wmoan is shit and that show is shit.

>>717762043
>Long feminine hair in female characters.
Expedition 33

>>717755464
kek, look at that dork
would drop money in her money jar

>>717756928
>Nintendo from bankruptcy
Never happened
>he made gameboy the more popular selling product
Game Watch was already popular and he wanted the gameboy to be with no interchangable cartrideges
>nepo baby
kys
> Some people even believe he actually (re)programmed DK singlehandedly
nobody in the world ever did and everybody know Miyamoto is not a coder
You are so full of shit

DK moved on from Candy.

>>717764181
My Japanese is shit. But I am pretty confident that it's not just saying girl, but little girl. As in child.
So the joke wouldn't be that DK is out dating some other girl or anything, but that he is raising a child without Candy.

>>717729535 (OP)
>>717731981
>>717746270
It's probably never gonna happen, but if Candy's always getting redesigns inspired by iconic bimbos like Pamela Anderson in her DK64 version, then if she's ever coming back, she'll probably look like a monkeyfied Sabrina Carpenter or Sydney Sweeney

>>717761878
dem footjobs, doe

>>717761878
The feet-hands are the best part though. Unironically.

>>717764680
She would unironically be more likely to be modelled after belle delphine or amouranth.
It's just how it is.

banan

>>717739697
He doesn’t care about us or porn anymore
He must’ve acquired pussy and ascended
Based lad
I’ll commission some Poppy with my specific fetishes instead (anal)

>>717764181
>>717764651
I'm guessing the joke is that Dixie thinks he had a daughter with someone else.

Diddy and Dixie are my favorite Nintendo characters.

>>717758405
>Kong Bananza's fur pattern points directly down into DK's ass crack

>>717765774
>He doesn’t care about us or porn anymore

>>717764651
Makes sense, DK and Candy were already young adults, Diddy and Dixie were teens and relatively close to DK's age. Still, that joke is something I wouldn't even expect from 90s DK lol I guess they're really trying to aim for a different vibe from Mario.

>>717766394
Your turn will come soon Anon.

>>717768064
False hope

I wish Kongs were real bros

>>717763553
>Never happened
Nintendo was almost literally nuked, you don't know shit.

>everybody know Miyamoto is not a coder
Everybody who isn't a Nintendo fan anyway.

>>717761890
She sure is sexy.

I've grown fond of Poppy Kong.

>>717769607
She should be Tiny's sister or cousin. Her own character. She shouldn't be Tiny herself.

>>717769870
>oh, we have different dads. Mine's human!

*forgets his racism*

>>717769830
She's so god damn sexy.

>>717769607
Sauce plz?

>>717770418
Dongitos

>>717762043
for me, it's bare legs
I don't even dislike jeans or hose, I just can't stand how bare legs are no longer allowed
>>717764651
you're being dumb on this one

>>717770272
agreed

>>717770718
Is it actually wrong?

>>717765674
I had to litetally yell at my niece to get her to stop eating a bannana by licking it like that. I didn't even tell her why it's inappropriate, so of course she complains to her mother, who flips out at me and somehow I'M the degenerate.

Can muscle faggots stop infecting everything?

>>717771694
onna no ko is used in the same way that "girl" is used in english. in other words, it often refers to adults as well.
>Did you see Bob with that other girl?
>Yeah. That piece of shit stole a promotion from me so I'm gonna tell his wife.

>>717771867
Moar.

>>717771867
Her tail ruins it for me

>>717762043
Autists who will call a game 0/10 slop due to hair clipping are partly to blame for this.

>>717729535 (OP)
good design just need to be way taller and more busty

>>717733679
They call it something

>>717730598
>Snake rattle N Rool
>N Rool

>>717757636
Where's this from?

>>717772316
Thing is though. Pauline is exactly what onna no ko would strictly describe. So why would you assume it wasn't referring to her as a child?

>>717774109
if her age was meant to be relevant, a different term would have been used
it's bizarre that a text with an obvious meaning has people making up bullshit to try to reinterpret it

seriously though why doesn't Pauline wear shoes