Thread 83078595

Docking edition

Escort still hasn't replied to my message I sent at 6pm yesterday lol

>>83078623
Time to move on, lad. Don't become a stalker like Ruthmong.

>>83077686
Found it, is there a prize?

>>83078630
I know. It's just painful being ghosted.

If she just fucking replied "no" I'd accept it and move on.

Repostin' cause I think you lads missed it.

Anyway I got a hairtransplant about a year ago, what do you think? Honestly I receive compliments daily about my hair and I think its shaved years off my actual age - often people think I'm early 20s

The daily adventures of escortlad XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

>>83078648
Uhm wrong board, lad. Posting your face here is actually a bannable offense.

Also, in my last message to her that I sent on WhatsApp, I even said that if she doesn't want to meet again she can just tell me. If she tells me, then I can actually move on.

It's got a double tick icon so it's definitely been received. I assume she has the "read" blue tick setting off.

Why are they so evasive? Ghosting is really just utterly infuriating. Should be illegal.

>>83078648
You look like a younger ryan gosling

>posting absolute rubbish at all hours and when pressed on something, feigning complete ignorance of the thing being criticised (it's not actually possible to be this stupid and ignorant)
These larps all have the same pattern. Really cringe.

>>83078696
ty, I never got that one before, personally I think im more Harry Styles but I'll take the compliment

>>83078707
These are grown men that think they're clever and funny.

>>83078716
Based hivemind. I was just thinking this. It's obviously a regular poster who thinks he's absolutely hilarious (he's not he's just embarrassing).

>>83078696
I disagree more like Brad Pitt if he lost some weight imo

i have a stretchy foreskin so i could do that quite well, i think

The quack job took my foreskin so now I can't do that >>83078595 (OP) with a mate

>>83078726
Nah he's more Orlando bloom, circa 2003 or so

Had a talk with the gf last night. Had to address what we both knew but haven't really talked about, that she pretty much isn't getting wet at all. She talked about all the reasons why she thought it was happening, but in the course of the chat she mentioned that if she's alone and reading hentai she gets super wet super quick.

It's fucking over for me lads.

>>83078709
Orlando Coom

>>83078709
Not sure if this a 20 year old or 50 year old man, would believe both

>>83078726
Ty!
>>83078731
Thanks!
>>83078735
I dont get the reference? lol...

>>83078749
This is what I looked like before I had the work done.

>>83078757
whoops forgot the image. This is how I looked before (from the side)

>>83078757
Are you Wolfgang lad?

>>83078761
Sorry I dont really get what you mean?

When will britfeel towers be getting a waking watch?

I don't want to see any posts on here from 11:00 to 11:02
GOT IT?

can i post now?

hello am I allowed to post???

Decided to message a few other escorts to see if I can try another one.

Probably the only way I'll move on. What do you reckon lads, good decision?

>>83078888
What are your criteria for escorts, lad? Do you have a particular look you're going for, or a particular sex act they accommodate?

>>83078648
>>>soc bro

co-worker is constantly coughing

>>83078910
insist they wear a face mask, you dont want their germs

>>83078895
It's looks and personality for me. Keep in mind I am still technically a virgin if you don't count oral.

I like a more natural look and those who seem like they have some intelligence.

>>83078910
>co-worker
what is one of those lad?

>>83078910
insist you facefuck the, you don't want to be backed up

>>83078926
its grim af, we are cooped up in a tiny boxroom aswell, i really hate being a wagie

Had my morning wank. Now time for vidya.

>>83079032
I thought you're a wagie, Chika?

>>83079040
I am WFH today and it's lush.

>>83078757
>>83078763
hey can you stop using question marks unless asking questions kthx

>>83079032
Nice one lad, planning my wfh wank for after our meeting at 11:30 so I don't have to think about anything aftre and can enjoy the wank as long as I want.
What were you cranking it to today lad?

He actually wakes up at 10:30am, rushes to his filthy desktop, and immediately posts personality drivel to try and wind up other posters. Lol. Every day, this is his life.

>>83079078
>He actually wakes up at 10:30am, rushes to his filthy desktop, and immediately posts personality drivel to try and wind up other posters. Lol. Every day, this is his life.
And who would this be lad?

Rattled IoI

Just a little vent post but it pisses me off that my brother doesn't look after his house. The garden is an eyesore and his exterior walls are covered in damp. Blinds look grotty and his windows haven't been cleaned for years. It's even worse on the inside. It's an embarrassment and I feel sorry for his neighbours.

Genuinely cannot believe that companies exist in the current year where they automatically sign you up for a subscription if you purchase something one time from them. Literally nothing will guarantee that I never ever ever buy from them again more than that disgusting, shitty practice.

>>83078910
Pull off all their skin

shit meself /=

>>83079177
Yeah I see this too every now and then. Single men who own a house/flat and just do not have the time, inclination, spare money etc. to properly maintain it. Historically this would've just been the remit of their wives, but today young people don't get married and form families and girls either think that waging is great (retarded) or they don't want to be wagies but the economy is so bad two jobs are needed to properly maintain a household (shit).

Life's not good for a lot of people. Of course he should just clean his fucking house, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't understand the attitude of finishing a days waging to come home to an empty house and... holy fuck the chores just are not worth it right now I want to sit down and relax with some vidya and wank. Chores end up piling up and you just sort of shrug it off since now the effort needed to attend to them is even greater than when they first started appearing. Quite sad cycle really.

The original escort still hasn't gotten back to me but another one I messaged has. Could well be in business lads.

>>83079200
That's why he should just sell up and just get himself a flat. At least it would be easier for him to maintain. Unfortunately he doesn't like change so he'll probably stick it out until the house falls apart.

>>83079111 This sad mong are both him >>83078630 >>83078643

>>83078630
I'm not. I just like her. Very nice lass really.

What's worse? To post drivel 16 hours a day or to read drivel 16 hours a day?

Soon gonna sleep till 11pm

Alri' lid.
Fancy a hot Swiss chocolate with extra cream and marshmellows? Only nine quid corr wot a bargain.
Perhaps a bratwurst in a bun lovely jubbly nice ten quid; sauces 40p each proper deal for the lids you're almost robbing me!
Got a nice steamin' Yorkshirerutto - lovely skirt steak cooked crispy with horseradish with riced parsnips and cabbage with a demi glace it only fourteen quid de lid you'd be mad not to get one.
Get the commemorative mug, only eighteen quid!

>>83079317
Those are 2 hours before you claimed this poster woke up.

Gotten up me phwoar X

Hella gay edishington btw innit

Fat depressed unemployed alcoholic mong sat on YouTube for an hour and 20 mins talking about mental elf and he's wondering why he's so depressed. Decades of drinking has shrunk his brain and lowered his IQ.

>>83078732
Offer to go down on her while she reads hentai then.

Nothing wrong with a marital aid

>>83079453
>Decades of drinking has shrunk his brain and lowered his IQ.
ignorance is bliss
cheers

Economy is shit. I'll never work.

Economy is good. But I'll never work.

SSM having a homemade trekkie brekkie

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=byb70O_vjIk

>>83079453
After the oscar winning performance he got bored of the "woe is me" routine and went off to make a healthy lunch (an entire packet of bacon) BUT its healthy because no rapeseed oil (??)

>>83079453
Decades of imposed "treatment" that equates to oppression via icepick for going bananas on acid, getting drunk, scoring with hot lady desired, wake up sheep, shrunk IQ from the retarded too? Join our zoo. Neural damage IQ shrinkage via scalpel over halo skill mate! Superior suckers scrim scalpel! Fucking faggots man, The lunacy of you people

SSM is obsessed with rapeseed oil.

>SSM UPDATE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LryDjoILXSw

>>83079526
He's cutting out the rapseed oil. It's all olive and butter for him, he loves it when he cuts right down this is lovely and he cuts it right down, wow!
Bit of lightly olive oil fried bread, a couple of perfect eggs, lovely bit of bacon and that is a lush meal.

>>83079543
Look at how it's processed for human consumption de lad.

>>83079526
This guy should be shown in schools as an example of why not to drink alcohol

Edish is a bit gay like x

Its NOT the decades of alcohol abuse, its the fuckin rapeseed oil REEEE

>>83079526
I haven't finished the video but I've never seen someone "fry" potatoes like this.
If you fry them you usually slice them up like crisps. Curiously finishing the video just to see what comes out.

Also organic milk tastes like absolute shit.

-wait the fucking captcha took so long he smashed them up with a fork. Honestly mate just make fucking smash whys he gotta fry em.

>>83079563
>Its NOT the decades of alcohol abuse, its the fuckin rapeseed oil REEEE

kek

>>83079526
>making something lush cause im broke, broke as a joke
he JUST sold his e-bike for 500quid what the fuck

>>83079526
skipped ahead cause I was getting bored, what the fuck is this shit

>>83079630
>500 quid

Id have asked for a 100 off considering it REEKS of fish and or shit

UK wide shutdown next week.
Get ready.
https://www.express.co.uk/news/weather/2132227/uk-snow-maps-forecast-england-counties

>on that WFH grind
>listlessly scrolling through youtube
>so bored I'm actually excited when a work e-mail comes in
I can't do this til my retirement, surely

>>83079630
How much did he pay for it?

>>83079655
aww sheeeeiitt that colour lines up to around 125cm of snow depth we are FUCKED

>>83079655
Lad id bet you any about of money none of this is going to happen

These shit rags just parrot this bollox every year

>>83079664
1400 I believe

>>83079548
cautionary tale for HHL

>>83079679
>1400
He needs a carer with power of attorney. He's mentally enfeeble.

>>83079687
He's burnt right through whatever inheritance his dad left him, somehow he's also spent 500 quid in four days

>>83079664
Bought it for 1700 all in with the accessories and sold it for 500. 1200 pound loss LOL

>>83079672
>You must fear the snoooooo

>>83079694
>>83079702
ngl he's looking more like a future Govt Chancellor material every day. What a tit of a man.

>>83079636
>1500 calorie meal it lush and healthy. No rapeseed oil for me my liiiiiid.

Got a single pork pie here lads, a bit full up and I don't know what to do with it. Can't be arsed going downstairs to put it back in the fridge. Will it go all crusty and hard if I leave it out for a while?

>>83079705
You vill eat de snow!

>>83079630
>>83079664
1600. sold for 550

>>83079694
Think it was about 10k. He bought that bike for 1700, new sofa, new TV, MacBook Pro for 1500, Apple Watch for 800, ps5 for 700, 100 pound in games, another few hundred on beer and taken Helen out, new desktop PC and whatever in between probably a few grand on bets in his deleted videos.
Here's a deleted video where he's having a massive melty over loosing a few hundred on a bet. https://youtu.be/8aXYkYEBQbQ?si=iiTxOgIQlW117U9Q

>>83079548
I don't know why he does this

>>83079707
That's only his first breakfast, he went and had another one with 7 slices of bacon, no rap seed oil though.

Just got back from that voluntary work now having wuppa. Got our new high-vis jackets today as the winter weather starts coming in. Provided free for all outdoor volunteers. It lush x

>>83079714
Wrap it in paper so it doesn't evaporate.

>>83079739
NO WAY Sean has the same coat as SSM. WTF

>>83079736
What will fill the deep dark hole in that mans heart???

>>83079736
>800
>for a watch
thats mental that

>melty over loosing a few hundred on a bet
Someone needs to introduce him to shitcoin gambling, at least in the case of shitcoins you rarely lose your entire investment

>Processed meats have been linked to chronic health conditions including high blood pressure, migraines, asthma, heart failure, kidney disease and even certain cancers.

>'The occasional bit of processed meat isn't likely to pose a major risk as part of an overall balanced diet, but it's wise to limit it to a weekend treat rather than eat it every day,' Rob Hobson, a registered nutritionist and author of Unprocess Your Life, told the Daily Mail.


SSMbros?

>>83079760
I think he's at the Mr Burns stage where all his illnesses are trying to take over, but finding that other ilnesses and health issues are blocking their paths to overwhelming him.

>>83079747

SSM paid for his though. I got mine for free.

>>83079772
SSM hasn't paid for anything in his life you fucking idiot

>>83079774

>SSM hasn't paid for anything in his life

Based x

Tim's home is 1700+ a week

>>83079739
Extra small size for you I assume? Lmao

>dossers getting giddy over their free high vis

They are literally the cheapest shite you can buy you fucking mongs, if you'd worked a day in your life you'd know this

>>83079740
A pork pie from Aldi evaporating I would like to see that lad. The only way it would evaporate would if it was in my stomach.

>>83079794
Care homes charge extortionate prices because they know they can get away with it. Cant pay? The council will be forced to. The companies know this.

wouldnt mind evaporating ruths pie

>>83079810
arnt there multiple companies competing for customers?

>>83079798

L size actually.

>>83079739
Lmao you actually are working for your bennies now. Christ.

>>83079822
Don't know to be honest. My mum works in care and she says they try to keep them in there for as long as possible because they make that much money from the council, It's a business at the end of the day care comes second.
Little Tim is making 82k a year for the home and that's just one person, they load the place up with as many spacks as possible to maximise profit. Quite sad really.

Can't beat a nice wuppa on a day like this. Quite looking forward to this winter me. Heating on for free this winter as well thanks to them energy credit vouchers. Could be worse lol x

>>83079864
it is worse lad

You are being forced to work outdoors over the winter for no wages

Me? I won't ever be drinking again, that's for sure

>>83079874
>You are being forced to work

I don't have to go if I don't want to. It's completely voluntary.

Wfh wank complete. My job is so fake I'm now going to stand up from my desk, get my coat and shoes on, walk into town, pick up a nice snack maybe grab a coffee from the cafe, leisurely walk home and resume work again without telling anyone and nothing will have happened. Nobody will even know.

Booked another escort for Saturday lads.

Unless a miracle happens, I'm gonna assume the original escort I saw two weeks ago is a lost cause.

>>83079927
You are the lost cause.

>>83079932
Why's that then? You all said try another escort

>>83079938
Because of how much you attached you got to this first escort, sending her messages over and over even though she wasn't responding.

>>83079847
he was on about it yesterday, I don't think it effects his benny claim though. I wouldn't be doing it though lad, happy taking my benny money for free :) a little something in this sad world

>>83079927
not sure you need an escort in your life lad, that money could be better spent. but up to you

>>83079899
Of course it is lol. The DWP got you over a barrel

>>83079899
If you are capable of working then you should get a paid job and stop claiming benefits.

>>83079899
>It's completely voluntary.
its not lad, if you refuse you will loose your bennies

>>83079998
why should I though lad?
I am a single male, no partners, no friends, no prospects in life anymore. What is working other than slavery for a pittance in todays economy? if I can claim bennies and not work why wouldn't I?

>>83078595 (OP)
Warehouse lad here. Lasted two weeks before I quit. Managed to get a job in an office. Thank fuck for that. That was the HARDEST job I've ever had lids. 8 hours of walking and not allowed to sit down (besides 30min break). Picking and packing at a fast rate of 50 per hour. Managers kicked off if you spoke to someone. Some of the products were 25kg tables with three seperate 25kg boxes that I have to put away. And the worst part? It was 10pm until 6am. So by the time I got home I was so tired I slept until like 5pm and then it was already dark when I woke up.

Worst fucking job I've ever had. Do not envy lads who are stuck there with no choice. Back to the womfy office on Monday for me.

Volunteering when your on benefits is retarded your basically telling the dwp you can work

>>83080035
What's your name so I can report you to the DWP.

>>83080040
Indeed. This is where Sean has fucked up

>>83080039
Lol the absolute stare modern men get no pussy and the privilege of breaking there backs in a warehouse. Neet for life x

>>83080053
Joshua Black, runcorn.

SSM volunteered at that charity shop and even filmed himself doing it for YouTube and they didn't cut his bennies. DWP don't give a fuck.

>>83080067
Funniest post of the thread, calling it already

Seriously just dont work. I'm so confused why so many dudes dont realise you can just stop working. What are they going to do?

>>83080090
Yeah I often wonder this. If you refuse to engage with the work finding process what can they actually do? They have statutory obligations to help deprived people, so they can't just stop your bennies or kick you out on the street (as long as you're not trashing the place).

>>83080090
>>83080095

how fucking stupid are some of you lads? lmao

>>83080095
It might have changed now, but when they thought that I wasn't looking for a job they cut all of my benefits. This was over 15 years ago though. They were perfectly happy to make me homeless.
Society doesn't give a shit about men in my experience. If you are a woman in danger of becoming homeless they will find somewhere for you to live, if you are a man, you'll get nothing.

Watching pokemon nuzlocke vids on bed thrn gonna sleep till 11pm. It womfy x

>>83080039

No wonder so many men kill themselves nowadays stuck in soul destroying jobs like this. And for what? To pay rent to some greedy landlord who takes half your wages? Fuck that noise.

>>83080090
But you are limited to living with your parents, a grotty social housing flat or a care home like HHL. Some lads want a better life.

>>83080106
>Brave
Cringe.

>>83080039
you should have kept at it lad

Office work is for women and failed men , sitting on your arse all day doing fuck all leads to your bones resembling jelly (aka a weak faggot)

Thats why you had a mental breakdown because you had to be on your feet for 8 hours lifting boxes, which in reality is fuck all compared to mechanics/builders or any other job that requires actual graft

>>83080107
Yeah lad, the dream is to live on benefits in care home, playing in the spacker league and picking litter for free

>>83080101
Alright lad calm down, I've never been on bennies and I don't know how the system works. If I'm wrong that's fine, just tell me how it works then.

>>83080103
Fair enough, though I have heard stories from people who work in local councils where random men will turn up at their office and say they're homeless and the law requires that the council finds them accommodation (hotel until permanent).

>>83080112
My council flat is decent and in a nice area. Most people working in London cant even afford their own flat lmao while their landlord can kick them out at any time

lunch, a day old greggs sosij roll I left on the side by mistake, a mince pie and a cup of tea.

>>83080139
Absolutely brutal facts here. This lad has nailed it.

>>83080128
You can maintain bones by doing a structured and safe weight lifting routine you dumb fuck instead of some slave job where you are subject to overworking and breaking your back any day

>>83080128
>which in reality is fuck all compared to mechanics/builders or any other job that requires actual graft
They suffer from it later in life when they can hardly walk at 50. But office wagies have fine bodies if they hit the gym after work.

SSM back on the beer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry_J1VkCi8E

>>83080140
What you're describing is actually how it works. Theres no actual reason to work in this country, if you end up homeless they're obligated to house you and give you benefits.

>>83080140
>I have heard stories from people who work in local councils where random men will turn up at their office and say they're homeless and the law requires that the council finds them accommodation (hotel until permanent).
I actually worked at the council in the department that handled homelessness. If an application for a man came in, it went in a pile that never got processed.

If an application for a woman came in, if they were below the age of 18, they would be priority and found a home ASAP (often these cases were people still living at home with parents but who declare that they can't any more, or in some cases, lived with their boyfriend and broke up, and they technically still have a home but have been told to leave, so the council makes sure they have somewhere to live).

>>83080112
the main argument is that if you have some warehouse job you're still going to live in a shithole (you'll be lucky if you can even afford to live alone) and maybe you'll have a bit of extra spending money but any extra good feels about self determination or whatever are absolutely flattened by having to work in a fucking warehouse for 40 hours a week

>>83080112
>social housing flat
prefer this lad rather than being taxcattle one pay day away from homelessness

>>83080168
If that was true there wouldn't be so many homeless men on the streets. They're not obligated, and they'll spend billions on housing Africans who turn up in a boat whilst ignoring rough sleepers.

>>83080166
Sitting in his flat with his coat on swigging beer at 2 in the afternoon. Grim.

>>83080187
Sounds based to me de lid

>>83080184
Those are drug addicts who are basically voluntary homeless.

>>83080184
The hostels/shelters have rules and the junkies hate that

They'd rather sit in a piss soaked alley all night and drink

>>83080205
was just about to type the same

>rich get richer
>poor get poorer
>middle-class diminishing
>country gradually gets worse for everyone

At least the rich can fuck off to another country whenever they want and escape this mess.

>>83080106
Btw I'm 26 if it matters x

What's the best way to feel better if you drank too much alcohol

>>83080229
drink more

>>83080112
Social housing is 10x better and more secure than private housing where your at the mercy of some landlord who can evict you at anytime or hike your rent without notice. I've rented social and private housing and the worst by far was private. Fucking prick even tried keeping my deposit when I moved out.

I would love to spunk inside a woman

Another wuppa down the hatch. Oh aye.

>>83080266
Same and I even bought another sim to contact a escort but in the last minute I decided not to desu would rather die virgin than pay for my first time so yeah thats that x

>>83080270
You are drinking too much tea

>>83080139

Nah I'm pretty comfortable with this lifestyle.

Shove your warehouse jobs up ya Tory arse x

>>83080282
how much is too much? I some times get the tea sick if I drink too many in a morning but it soon wears off

>>83079945
>sending her messages over and over even though she wasn't responding.
I sent her three. All of which were spread out over 8 days.

Obviously I won't do that again.

>>83080282

I'll probably switch it up to Lucozade in a bit x

Delivery riders are genuinely the backbone of the UK economy right now

>>83080317
gotta feed the slop to the masses

They love paying 2x the amount for cold food delivered by a jeet

Country is doing great

>>83080184
Not taking one side or the other for that particular discussion lad, but the actually homeless people you see living on the streets are there by choice. There are a million different ways, charities, NGOs, government programs, churches etc. that can get you off the street, it's just that the alcoholic petty criminal drug addict types find it easier to live their lifestyle on the street.

>>83080317
>>83080323
What can I say ubereats it womfy x

I tried buying a takeaway in person but for some reason it doesnt hit the same when it's not delivered

>the amount of lads in this thread that don't realise they can just not get a job from someone else and actually start doing from themselves and we are one of the countries that actually has a decent gov website when it comes to starting your own business up plenty of info and shit

Process Serving fellas. Just chase chavs and bill Nasheed Solicitors 90quid for every visit. Private investigation if you are a real wierdo( bills high as fuck to the right clients) Fuck me buy an Ozone machine from amazon and HIT your local area with flyers you'll have tons of business ozone machining car interiors (takes less than an hour btw) and the device costs 50squid from bezos I put a family member on to this and he's doing an extra 300 a weekend in cash around his wagie job
COME ON BOYS
DO SOMETHING
WIT YER FOOKN LIVES

>>83080336
Why would people want ozone in their car? It's toxic

If someone said they'd been cockslapped would your assumption be that they were slapped in the cock, or that someone had slapped them with a cock - most likely in the face? I keep going back and forth, it definitely sounds like the cock is doing the slapping, but for someone to do that to you is so much harder than just wrapping at your cock with their hand.

>>83080384
Cockslapped means slapped with a penis, typically in the face.

>>83080384
I like to spin it over my head like a lasso then whip it at some cunts face

>>83080336
how's about....no?

I've decided it's time for me to ask father Christmas for some nice ambient noise cancelling headphones, can't wait to just sit around in total silence every time I go out in public. I'm looking at the sennheiser momentum 4 I think, it was them or Sony xm4 and I personally like sennheiser a bit more. Problem is I don't have any relative that'll spend that much cash on me, and people are annoying when I say I want cash for a particular thing. I'm just going to have to put my foot down, then I can sit there at the Christmas dinner table with them on listening to porn and nobody will be any the wiser.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Y227D1u0o8

Choon time lids

MSX FM will forever been the best GTA radio station

>>83080336
>Process Serving fellas. Just chase chavs and bill Nasheed Solicitors 90quid for every visit.

Qrd?

Corrr love when you listen to a song again after not hearing it in ages and it's like hearing it for the first time int it. Or rather that point on the fourth listen or something.

Me? Enjoy pretending to be an anime girl in MMOs online when im a hairy man irl x

>>83080513
Do you ever buy women's knickers and wear them about the house?

>>83080513
Tbh there is a use in this anyway in online games. Play as a female character and play support and things like that, people simp, people help you, less seethe towards you etc.

Had to turn heating off. It too warm now.

I wish my dick was big enough to allow for a man to shoot sticky ropes inside of my urethra. Fuck... I'm going to jerk off to cock vore and urethra play.

>>83080521
>Do you ever buy women's knickers and wear them about the house?
I did when I was young in my femboy days but not anymore

>>83080538
True that lad people are nicer to girl characters