>>24568141
In the last scene, they give him a nickname, and it's kind of a big deal, so I was just re-hitting that beat because there was a perspective change between then and now, so people might get muddled.
> inner city boy(white)
>What is this supposed to mean?
One of the themes is just how ignorant people are about the poor white class and how they're just totally forgotten about in a lot of ways.
>The dialogue doesn't sound realistic
Yeah, that's kind of what I'm going for; it's supposed to be a bit too good to be true. Eh, even if people don't speak like that, they could if they were comfortable enough, and I think anyone who's ever read Shelley has wanted someone to quote him to and from. Then again, if it's so unrealistic that it's taking you out of the moment, maybe I ought to change it.
>To me, this doesn't sound like the actual story, more like the setting. I think you can dig deeper and find more than that.
Okay, well, it's just one narrative beat; the whole story is too expansive to prattle off about for a whole post and bore everyone to death.
Thanks for the words anon
