i feel like i'll never be satisfied with how i spend my life
so i've spent most of it frozen doing nothing creating zero memories
its scary, depressing, and i'm not sure it will ever end

i cant make meaningful connections, the only one i had in years was an ewhore relationship and it destroyed me losing someone i thought i finally connected with. im sentimental so until i find something new im likely going to never stop thinking back and being sad over the times i felt happy.

and im 24 so the reality of not being "young" too is the final nail in the coffin
im doing my best to break out of this cycle, but then i think about the past 6 years, college, an empty blur of being alone, graduating, working for two years, pretty much all of it an isolated blur.

if anyone has advice on taking control of your life, eliminating FOMO, being able to act on your impulses, connect with people you want to connect to, please share.

>>82273515
>cant help who you fall in love with. itll be ok
i hope so, i guess im trying to put myself more in social situations now to make that happen, because i doubt i'll ever meet anyone again with how i currently am socially (no friends)
i kind of had gotten used to being alone, it sucked but i got by. now when im alone i sometimes get physical pain in my stomach thinking about how theres no one i care about to reach out to me, send me a silly message, share something with their day about me, or to spend some time with

anyways thanks for replying to my rant posts i hope you find yourself better soon

Some 'go 'za is waiting for me at the armed holdup training for my job tonight

I'm 19 and I feel like I will die alone. I could only have online relationships because banking on the people around you to really *get* you is honestly rather dumb unless you're like them. These relationships were all failures, and in one of them I even got cheated on. Only one of them was of any considerable length, and of course it was the one where I was cheated on.
Time is also clearly running out. Every day that passes, the chances of me finding any love decreases as it goes on.

The types of girls that I would have good chemistry with, are insanely hard to get with in the first place. You can have everything going right and it won't happen anyway, because they're too autistic to even want to date anybody. This makes the amount of chances that I have far more limited than they seem. Now let's not even get into the crazy amounts of competition out there. Or how it's very difficult to even *want* to take that chance, when everyone knows just how tired good women may be of having people be attracted to them.

And you know what? This wouldn't matter to me so much if I hadn't met her. When you're shown how love is, you do not forget. That sticks with you. Whatever comes after losing it is just cope, ignoring the elephant in the room, as you're assaulted on the daily by imagery and bullshit everywhere about how hopeless the situation is, everybody wanting to convince you one way or another that yes, it's fucking hopeless, so just give up forever because you'll only be hurt again. And what. I'm supposed to pretend like that doesn't affect me?