>>40964103
I want to cut myself while jacking off.

>>40939089
You're abusive because you're a mean cunt. You could oh idk, just not fucking reply to me you stupid tranny cunt? fucking worthless bitch needs to kill herself already.

I’m pregnant

autistic passoid tranny, 10 years on hrt. tried stealth, just ended up isolated and rotting in my own head. this year i tried making friends with other troons, every single friendship ends in drama. either i misunderstand something because im retarded, or i say how i feel about something shitty they did and it blows up. there's often a weird undercurrent where they wanted to fuck me, i friendzone them, and they get resentful.

i get treated like a piece of shit assimilationist freak in every queer space i touch. the only place i feel remotely okay or normal is with my cis bf, and i just lost all my other friends over one of these friendgroup-imploding tranny fights and i feel like im going insane.

i've tried to do everything right and I just end up feeling more alienated, misunderstood, and pushed out. is it me? am i just retarded?? is it the community? why is this the outcome every time? is there even a way forward or do i just rope

Every cis man I see with more feminine proportions than me is the ultimate ropefuel. I wish reincarnation was real because it would realistically be my only hope of ever passing or being content with my own body.

>>40618233
thanks nona, i thought i had a puppygirl for a bit but she's gone quiet on me for months now. it's been hitting me again how a puppygirl i met a year ago was almost perfect and she's gone and not coming back. What I'd do for someone who could give me what she did.

>>40606056
it's true, i'm still not over the girl who broke my heart last year

A stupid vent about my dumb tranny life
> 24, boymoder
> non dysphoric childhood
>neurodivergent to the point of requiring a teaching aid in elementary school
> written up every year of elementary school
> buzzed head all of childhood
> learns about puberty, suddenly dysphoric
> desperate not to become a man
> middle school anorexia, late puberty
> when puberty arrives, it mangles my face
> referred to as "the jew" all through high school because of massive nose
> practically zero interest in sex until 17
> 16, certain I'm trans, about to troon out
> Suddenly gets a girlfriend, decides to rep
> Date for 5 years, 3 long distance
> I break up with her because we mutually suck and everyone is horribly miserable
> cope with breakup by becoming massive stoner, dysphoria hits like a mack truck
> two family members die the same year
> crippling paranoia increases, convinced I am abhorrent person due to breakup
> feels like I can never date again
> scared of everyone, especially cis women my age
> self isolate, lose all my college friends
> finally get on HRT and manage to graduate, but damage is done
> inept socially, chronic laziness
> gets job, but can't get full time due to federal cuts
> starts cutting
> off to grad school, but can barely stand being awake

I'm still stuck in the past and I want to move on. How the hell does one find the willpower to do better? Stupid post?

I fucked another tranny a few days ago and I wasn't all that attracted to her as I thought I should have been, so I just kind of went through the motions and now as a result I'm grossed out from the thought of having sex. I just wanna find love at this point but I also don't really know how to do that without hooking up with enough people until I find someone who I'm really into. While it's worked a few times, I haven't really fallen for anyone that way in a way that worked out for me. Even the times I hookup with someone and I do fall for them it just doesn't work out for me and it's usually a fairly one-sided attraction.
I dunno man, I'm at a weird point in my life after that night. I think I get why growing up my parents told me not to have sex with someone unless I felt a real strong attachment to them, and while I'm not that cucked maybe there was a grain of truth to that.

i do not like how it feels

>>60506181
>it’s real