Thread 33763110

>What is /htgwg/?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of them even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.

>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, give up, or insist there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!

>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question.

>Resources and Books
Wingman.live: https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach)
"Models": https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612
Wingmam: https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq
https://dokumen.pub/why-women-deserve-less-firstnbsped-1467978302-r-1917433.html
(new suggestions with working links are welcome)

REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.

Prev: >>33732034

>I'm not asking for much, I just have some preferences
>she can't:
>drink
>do drugs
>go out to night clubs
>have tattoos
>have piercings
>have dyed hair, unless it's of a naturally-occurring color (e.g. brunette to blonde)
>have had sex
>have had touched herself
>have had any other form of physical intimacy
>have a dating history
>have any male siblings, especially older ones
>have any male friends
>have any female friends, just to be safe
>have a cell phone
>have social media
>wear any sort of pants, ESPECIALLY shorts
>wear skirts that end above the ankles
>wear too much makeup, but not enough, it has to be juuuuust right
>travel
>go to college

fellas, why are we like this?

>>33763310
>why are we like this?
Its just you lil bro. There is no "we".

>>33763310
>>have dyed hair, unless it's of a naturally-occurring color (e.g. brunette to blonde)
it's impossible to dye your hair a lighter color

I can't find prostitutes in my small town, there is no information online, how do I find a prostitute with visual clues? Yes, it is legal here in my country

>>33763442
I'll assume you are in Europe.
Just take the trip to a nearby city wtf.
I've never fucked a street walker, that's kind crazy

>>33763110 (OP)
Did you guys actually sleep with Fat girls for easy pussy? Like that an actual thing right?

>>33763543
>Fat
no, had a bunch of opportunities and passed on them all
>borderline fat/chunky/plump/thicc & weird body shape
yeah

>>33763543
>sleep with fat girls
Yes one time
>easy pussy
Yes believe it or not, it’s kind of stupid easy

I don’t regret it but I don’t think I would do it again

>>33763310
Must suck to live this way

>Be me at Gym
>Doing 350 pound seated Machine Tricep dips
>Blonde fit cutie walks towards me
>I catch her in my peripheral
>Slightly look over and see that she is staring at me like she has something to say
>She walks away
>Awkward

Has this happened to anyone else? Did she just confuse me for someone else, or was she checking me out, but decided not to say something?

Hey guys
I’m a blonde girl who likes to workout
For some reason this guy stares me down like he has issues when I’m just walking by to get to another machine
I hope he doesn’t run home and fantasize about this encounter

>>33763543
I refused pussy served on the plate for me, the girl was in love with me, I think I would be scared to see what a naked fat girl looks like

>>33763543
I tried it once and she got pissed because I couldn't get hard

>>33763563
>no, had a bunch of opportunities and passed on them all
Chadlite

>>33763786
You really have a mental illness

just sad man.

>>33763852
Are you talking to yourself? NTA but you cry about the same shit in every thread

>>33763786
There were no other machines in the area, it was at the corner of the gym. She was 3 feet away from me. My face was not pointed to her, but I noticed someone walking towards me, when I glance over with my eyes she is staring at me, then she turns around and walks away. Imagine you're sitting at a table in a café by yourself, no one else near you, and you're staring at a computer for schoolwork, when someone walks right up to you because they recognize you. It was similar to that. Your little joke is not even relatable to what happened, faggot.

>>33763895
>Your little joke
damn, that really upset you.

>>33763110 (OP)
After some self assessment I believe I may be an uncomfortable person to be around.
I think the biggest piece of evidence is that the managers I worked for at my last job always felt the need to lie to me or avoid answering me at all. Weather it was for why I didn’t get a promotion or just a complaint I was being given about being too loud. She always averted her gaze when we were clocking in. The moment I thought about transferring instead of waiting on a promotion, she jumped on it and any pretense of friendliness disappeared because all of it was lie I was too stupid to see.
Other people got a clear answer. Other people got chewed out. With me, it was as if she was afraid of me.
>what does this have to do with /htgwg/
This seams to happen a lot when I cold and warm approaches.
>The girl will scream after I say hi.
>I’ll try to be friendly back with someone who started talking to me, and then they pull away.
>a friend who I get along with just fine and never tried to date will have a mutual suggest the idea, and she will look at me with disgust.
So I’m big, scary, and/or ugly. And it has nothing to do with a personality defect if I get these reactions without a sentence in.
What’s the right thing to do in this situation?
I want better companionship, but even pursuing it just makes me this creepy and scary guy.
Do I just become an isolated hermit and cease as much interaction as possible? Or will that make me an even worse person?
Do I continue trying to talk to women?
They seem the most scared of me. But I also don’t do it that much. It’s like cycles where I try for a few months and give up for a few month.

>>33763442
>Yes, it is legal here in my country
Lucky bastard. Fuck the US.

Focus on school, focus on work, and focus on family. For the love of God don't make my mistake which is spend 15 years of life wasted on trying to get a girlfriend. I could have finished college earlier had I not done all of that.

>>33764327
How old are you now?

>>33764719
30

>>33764726
I have a bit of time left. Thank you, anon.

>>33764742
You let people label you anon. You label yourself too often too. I am not a dateless khhtv, but why live your life to that fucking standard.

Oh ThAt HaRmLeSs DoRk oVeR tHeRe oH hE's GaY bEcAuSe He'S a ViRgIn??? What the fuck anon are you ever going to get over your retarded phase you had at 14?

I fucking hate hipsters too. Can't have a fucking god damn normal conversation without one acting arrogant and in a no bullshit mood. Just what the fuck! What in the absolute fuck!

>>33764774
I'm basically playing catchup because I spent 6 years of my life by being a neet. I just got my first job in retail about 3 weeks ago. realistically speaking, there aren't that many women who would be interested in a guy like me because there are better options. Maybe I misread your post and you're calling me out for calling virgin men losers?

>>33764905
HOLY FUCK YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND SARCASM! Neurotypicals everytime I am with them do not gramatically understand antcedants, sentence structure, figurtive language, jokes, and now sarcasm.

>>33764958
It's harder to read sarcasm in the form of texts on a screen unless it's structured to be very obvious. Also, I'm not a neurotypical. I think.

>NTs be like
>Oh look it is a well constructed directly supported belief by anon
>Notices autism
>Nope anon is autistic so let's completely derail his argument and go into fucked up surreal world and imply he deviously means the opposite
>Me with wtfface.jpg

>>33764983
Okay anyway glad you aren't who I think you are. Misread your tone and attitude. My bad I thought you were the atypical cynic I deal with here. But yes you do have time and it isn't the end of the world to be a NEET.

How do you differentiate between a girl being nice and flirting?

>>33765003
Well I'm not a neet anymore, so that's a good thing.

>>3375869

I'm the guy who posted >>33726382
I can't emphasize this enough:
You know how sometimes they say "be yourself" so you can get girls? A lot of being yourself is confidence. Confidence is facial expressions. That is completely obscured and warped by glasses. Whereas otherwise you'd have looked confident, you'll just look awkward and like a dork. This is especially magnified when we're talking basic selfies (of which decent ones are a requirement for social media) or photos. You're going to have a really bad time building social proof with glasses. Speaking of which, that is the reason Stacy rejected you. That is the reason Chad doesn't like you. That is the reason you were never invited to parties or had Chad friends. You look so awkward and no one wants to lower their SMV and have a nerd friend like you. Stacy may have wanted attention from you but noticed the dorkiness from another angle, then played games with you and ghosted you. Glasses lead to constant frustration and humiliation. Burn this into your head.

>>33765257
>>33758693

>>33763895
>>33763761
Sometimes, especially when I'm doing something disorienting, like working out, I wander around like a fucking idiot staring at things just to get myself back into reality while I catch my breath. It snaps me back into focus. Maybe she was doing the same, I really wouldn't read into such things a lot. And if you want to be that super friendly guy who talks to everyone, then you can do that, and next time go like hey what's up? With a wide smile and then if she says oh nothing sorry :) you can tell her oh it's okay you're allowed to approach me xddd
Could be cute and funny
But yeah as is right now, a female just walked near you. Seeing it as a signal is way too overblown

>>33764198
Sounds like you must have real goblin energy. It's probably combined with looks like you're thinking. But yeah I wouldn't discredit that this could be your personality. Women are literally built on FEELING the energy of a person. To get with women you must have good energy, and good energy starts in the mind. It starts with how you think and your attitude towards people and life. If you have unhealthy thoughts, you'll exude this energy. If my advice sounds vague it's because I don't know you so I'm giving you an advice that would apply to everyone - good thoughts and mindset and mentality means you have good energy means that people will like you.
Also since you're mentioning girls - you need to follow the theory of abundance rather than scarcity. Make yourself meet many women on the daily, if you see that there's a lot - you'll act needy less often. This worked for me personally.

>>33765091
To add on this,
What are some examples of how you would flirt with a girl?
Is it asking her about her interests? Is it calling her pretty? Is it complimenting her outfit?

Does being a bit of a creep work? Like staring at her ass (not too long and obviously not making any excessive expressions)

>>33765867
Only if you're attractive

>>33765878
It's over.

I have about 4 years max to get married and I've never even kissed a girl. Either I find some ~20yo at college that wants a lot of kids or I graduate, go to some third world country, and take a girl from there.
Either way I have basically no time with massive potential for failure or bad results.
I don't want things to be easy, but I wish they weren't this hard. Making solid progress every day but the uncertainty and worry are always there in the background.

>>33765867
if you manage to make that funny, it can work. acknowledge you're checking her out and play it cocky / lighthearted.
at the very least, smile and look her in the eye afterwards

t. 6'4

Think I've made a rookie mistake bros
>Match with really attractive woman
>Attractive women are a rarity for me
>Used one of her prompts that actually worked as a kind of icebreaker for a change
>Asked a couple of generic "how are you" "what have you been doing" questions and even they worked
>Then I massively dropped the ball by asking what she was doing this week instead of doing it more casual with the old what are your interests and/or hobbies

She hasn't replied. I always do this. Somehow if I think out a reply I overthink it, if I reply too quickly I say something stupid, but regardless which one I do I always think of something better when it's already too late.

>>33766065
At this point, Just date bigger women to gain conversational skill

>>33766089
I have been doing that. I took that /adv/ice initially and it did work, massively helped me in fact. The biggest problem for me is that I know really attractive women are talking to other people who aren't as retarded as I am and they can't be fucked on with that.

Hey guys i need some advice on sex
yesterday i was with my girl ive been dating for a couple of weeks and i couldnt get it up, sadly. I like her, she has a nice ass and nice tits so no problem in that regard, so i really dont know why i couldnt get it up. Im still calm since i managed to make her cum twice with my hands, but still...im depressed man
should i just take viagra? it was gonna be by first time btw, is this normal? does time need to pass?

>>33766097
Ok, Why do you think asking generic questions is a good idea

>>33766169
I don't. I just can't think of anything else to say because there's nothing to really work with until I know something about them and the only way I can find those things out is by asking generic questions and starting slow.
The very odd time there's been something on a bio I can use they unmatch as soon as I've mentioned it. Genuinely every single time without even replying to the message.

>>33766180
Don't listen to that guy. It's a good idea in your case. It worked for you, that means you look like a nice guy. Doesn't work for 99% of men because we don't look like one.

>>33766180
>>33766097
In my humble opinion, a girl that cant stand generic questions is a red flag. You dont know anything about her, there's nothing wrong with asking generic stuff until something more interesting comes up. Its not about the question itself, is how much you say about it. Theres a difference between
>how are you
>good and you
>good
and
>how are you
>im great, drinking some coffee now to survive this week, and you
>oh what kind of coffee do you like?
bla bla

A woman that gets annoyed at generic questions just either dont have anything to say or they still live in fantasy world like some chad is gonna sweep her out with the perfect questions, perfect game and take her out of her monotonous life.

>>33766215
I mean in fairness it will work sometimes and if it doesn't it's like there's no way around it because you need to do the dreaded double message.
Personally I think I look like a complete scumbag too, but from the compliments I get the ones I match with don't seem to think so. Or at least some of them don't. With others it's clear they think I am, but they like that because it's someone to "tame". It's very polar opposite shit, but it's been like that my whole life.

>>33766254
I would agree with that, especially with how it's worded. As long as there's something to work with I can easily get a conversation out of someone, but when it's that first green text it's as if I can feel my own energy draining and I can't be bothered. As long as there's something, anything, there I can ask a question about it's no problem.
>A woman that gets annoyed at generic questions just either dont have anything to say or they still live in fantasy world like some chad is gonna sweep her out with the perfect questions, perfect game and take her out of her monotonous life
I suppose something a bit related to that is when I ask someone something and they say "read my bio" and in fairness to them what I'm asking is on there, but when you ask them about their likes or something along those lines they don't list everything. They'll mention what they like most so the conversation can always stay with what they're most interested in.
It's a little similar to being in a thread and asking a question you can google. Yeah I can google it, but having someone answer it means it can be discussed with that person and other people will join in.

Thanks bros.

Went to a local Oktoberfest event this weekend, all three of the woman below 35 were hefty barrel chested freaks - like tomatoes on stilts, which is a considerable step up from the usual geriatric 45+ crowd I come across in this city.

I still don't have a good idea where women still able and healthy enough to get knocked up hang out.

>>33765893
>I have about 4 years max to get married
In what way do you have such a stupid deadline

>>33766065
You should be asking her out within the first 3 moves anyways. If she replies eventually, spin it into a proper invitation

>>33766518
If a guy has kids past bout 38 theyll be autists or schizos.
In 4 years Ill be early 30s which gives me time for 4 or 5 kids.

>>33766543
It's not the man so much as the woman.

is this legit?

>>33766959
Chad doesn't need to play mind games

How can I obtain a Japanese wife? I visited last month and yeah I'm thinking this is what is best. Sadly, I am very tied to living in the US instead of living over there, but I am willing to steal one waifu for the United States. (I am willing to risk getting cucked for a VISA, I mean, you run any risk with marriage nowadays anyways lmao)

Attraction (30yo, 6ft2in, white, and fit), language (I know the basics at least), and money ain't no issue, I just don't know the best way to go about it.

>>33763543
>Like that an actual thing right?
No, its not. What is an actual thing is they have a well earned reputation for being good at BJs. Its a pretty good time, more fun than alone at home with your own hand.

>>33766954
the man has an affect too i know from the experience of being born to a guy who was a virgin into his 40s

>>33763761
>staring at me like she has something to say
Unfortunately I have considerable experience with ask her friends what she was thinking and you hear:
"When is this idiot going to talk to me or ask me out? How many more times do I have to walk past him with my yoga pants pulled up into my crotch its uncomfortable."
"Well F him if he's giving me the silent treatment, I'm leaving, plenty of other guys will talk to me."

>>33767045
>30yo
kek
Get ready to be a step daddy

almost 27, never had gf/sex yadda yadda whatever, how do i get motivation to like bother with dating? I dont even have a sex drive anymore, I dont jerk off or watch porn and I'm not even obese. Am I supposed to go to the doc and ask for like Bupropion?

>>33767080
sounds like your not healthy. maybe go to the gym, lose weight, get your plenty or protein and micro nutrients, go on walks, get lots of sleep, etc

>>33765091
>being nice and flirting
Being nice is talking about anything.
Flirting is a topic directly related to or at least adjacent to dating or sex.
"How about that football game last night" or "whats your opinion on the tin ore import tariff changes for 2027?" is being nice.
"How about that Apple Harvest Festival Beer Garden next week I wish I had someone to go with me" or "My doctor put me on a new birth control pill and I sleep so well now" or "what are your weekend plans this saturday night I don't have any yet" or "I just bought these new yoga pants I am not sure if they are too tight or not, what do you think of them?" are flirting.

>>33765257
>Confidence is facial expressions.
LOL I'd say its mostly the stuff you say and especially how you say it and tone of voice LOL.
Superman sounds like superman speaking, not klark kent speaking. I don't think its the cape or the smile.

>>33767074
brownoid detected

>>33767045
>How can I obtain a Japanese wife?
come to brazil

>>33765867
My experience is they consider looking and touching about the same and if they like you they really like it, if they don't like you then you will be in trouble. Generally you'll only get in legal trouble for touching and looking is OK if you want to give up all hope of getting together if she doesn't already like you.
"Oh, I like it when YOU look"
There are exceptions like professional strippers on the job, I guess, but pretty much permission to touch and stare "look" are a package deal.

I got rejected, it's a bit different this time, I kinda feel weak and empty. Not sad, when will this end? Help me god to get through this and please help me find a wife.

>>33767080
>ask for like Bupropion
LOL no ask for a full hormone test suite.
Probably very low T, maybe low thyroid, hard to say.
Unironically you need either a male doctor for this or a /fit/bro /fit/broette doctor. Generic chick doctor #423516 will see a wide range of "normal male adult T range" and you have a great T level for a 90 year old man complete with a typical 90 year old man's raging sex drive (aka none) so you'll not get a script. You want a normal-to-high T level for a guy your age not for a 90 year old man who's technically an adult male. Dude doctors or /fit/ doctors will understand.
You may have to doctor shop a bit.

How do I break the ice with a gym thot?

>>33767246
Im no chad but you dont. You try to keep it as professional as possible and let her be the one that suggests something outside of the gym. "are you using this machine" etc.

>>33767246
Make eye contact and smile. See what she does.

>>33767246
Play the long game
Make eye contact and smile
Say hi the next couple sessions you walk past
See if she initiates the greetings
Then you can try making small talk and light flirting for a couple sessions ask for her name etc
Then you can suggest meeting outside the gym

Gym is different from apps and going out in that you should slow down a bit.

>>33767253
>>33767256
>>33767267
thanks, I'm on it now boys.

>>33766390
There are many at university

>>33767338
where to chill at a university? i went to the bars, and they were only old fucks, albeit i might have went too early day...

I can't believe I need a degree in the science of picking up women these days.

I'm going to start not giving a fuck, become stoic and shoot in all directions

Tired of this shit, I'm going to give up my empathy, maybe this way my chances will increase

>get match
>talk to girl about her cat
>making jokes, think things are going okay
>eventually cat discussion trails off
>ask how her day’s going and send a cat picture (she has similar pictures)
>ghosted
What the fuck did I do? Should I just fucking ask at this point “before you leave what did I do wrong?”

>>33767576
You talked about her cat instead of about her and then signaled for her to lead the conversation. She ain’t got time for that when she can just go to the next one in her dms.

>Text text text text text
>Go on one of our dates that ends terribly
>Three texts a day now if I'm lucky
>"I'm just tired lol"
She's getting bucked wild isn't she

>>33767608
Okay, so what do I do differently? Do I just ramble on about topics and let her respond?

>>33767660
Ask her for pictures of her kitty

>>33767660
These sites are for dating or hooking up. Don’t drag your feet getting to the point.

>>33767674
It’s only been a day, you think I still have a shot if I ask her to send pics of her cat?

>>33767514
Literally just look good and talk to them like you would a guy friend.
Dont talk about autistic shit like how you play world of warcraft though. Talking about the weather is better than that.

>>33767683
How long should I go back and forth before asking for a date? After one round of conversation/topic?

>>33767685
If you want to fuck her and she’s seems cold, burn it all down and ask her for lewd pics. If she doesn't respond move on to the next girl.
If she sends you pics tell her you wanna fuck her

>>33767695
You do you, but right off the bat i choose something to compliment her on then say that i’d love to take her out this weekend.

>>33767719
Ok. That may be my problem, I think I’m talking for too long on these apps

>>33767692
>implying autists can do small talk

>cold approach cute girl in B&N with intent of getting her number
>usually do this by just saying they're cute, which I think is not a great approach because it's so nonspecific, but I suck at sparking conversations with strangers, so I try to keep it simple so I don't get tongue-tied and also quick so I don't waste either of our time
> this time compliment her dress and ask where she got it (this wasn't a lie, it was a nice dress)
>she's very smiley and seems to be enjoying the conversation, talking about where she grew up, where she lives, how she likes it in the city etc.
>instead of asking for her number, I end up just saying "thanks have a great day" and leaving, because it was a pleasant interaction and didn't want to "ruin" it by trying to pick her up
I'm so fucking backwards bros.

>>33767904
Thanks for the laugh, anon. I needed that.

>>33767904
fucking retard kys

>>33764327
I'm studying hard to get a job that will make me rich. It's possible, but it will take at least two years.

But I also want to use my time to pick up women... I feel like I need to do both or I'll have that missing out feeling.

>>33767904
>got her smiling, giggling, telling you personal details
>eruhhh, have a g-g-good day! *runs off*
Some of you deserve to die alone, I swear to God.

Reminder that she expects you to hit on her.

Beautiful women don't fuck cowards.

>>33764327
Is it bad that I'm 22, going on 23, and still trying to figure out what to study for college? I don't even think I should go at this point, I need something that'll get me into a decent salary 1-2 years post graduation but it feels like a pipe dream. I hate working a job that pays pennies

>>33767904
ignore the retards shitting on you anon, sometimes it's totally fine to just have a conversation with a girl and end it there. it's great practice and does wonders for the sense of desperation which in fact ruins most pickups (rather than the act of trying to get their number).

>>33767054
I don’t think being born to an older father is why you’re a 4chan browsing weirdo.

I fucking hate these 'test' questions
>but anon....how much do you love me???
>How far are you willing to go to be with me??
etc.
How to deal with them. Im not a smoothtalker.

>>33768087
dont play her games

>>33768087
with indifference, do not put effort into passing them

>>33768092
Waht im a supposed to say then?

>>33768087
>Im not a smoothtalker.
You’ve got to do the opposite of a smooth talking and just flat out shut that shit down.

If she isnt texting me daily, I pretty much have no shot right?

>>33768101
ugh

>>33768181
Don’t know if this is your style, but you can do it like a southern father reprimanding his young daughter. “Uh uh, no ma’am. We don’t play those games.”

>>33768197
A bit too late for that. she insists I give real answers. In my mind im asking myself:why the fuck does she feel the need to introduce this tension for no reaso. Do I really need to prove myself every time?

>>33768087
>bout tree fiddy

>>33767054
Sounds more like being a loser is a genetic thing that your dad passed on

>>33768211
You dont get it. She only does this because you let her.

>>33768027
he just rejected a girl who was interested in him

>>33767054
So why am I a 4chan browsing weirdo?

>>33768430
Parents need to take care of their kids. That's my story, and my dad's.
That said there's a difference. My dad was woefully out of touch with his biology. He literally didn't care about girls.
I on the other hand have been desperately trying to get girls to like me since probably 2018 and I was 20 back then.
Me being a loser is because I was corrupted into a hopeless degenerate. Fixing that now though.
My dad literally just enjoyed his life. He didn't care about girls until the last moment.

If a guy has kids in his 40s the kids are more likely to end up being neurodivergent. Can't say what's wrong with me specifically, but its not nothing. My existence is far too cerebral compared to the average person.

>>33767124
What you're saying is that superman can be a scrawny kid and still be superman. There's a fine line between a muscular man and scrawny kid, can we agree on that? The same thing applies to faces. Just as a recessed face can't be superman, he needs a proper jawline to be perceived as such. The same applies to facial features. A distorted face can't be superman. What about a sad face? Or depressed face? Compare that with cheery. These also affect perceived confidence. And if we keep going, we land at glasses skewing the face and therefore causing a breakdown in how "confident" you look.

>>33769085
What's wrong with neurodivergence? Neurodivergence is just a different way of thinking. They can still be intelligent functioning members of society. People with down syndrome can be as well. If I had a kid he may be autistic, but I know he'll be a decent intelligent guy who is a bit quiet and serious, but stays focused.

>>33769375
And to reiterate, I must emphasize this. Eyes are the most powerful asset that determines whether someone views you as confident or not. Especially, a facial expression will be distinctly remembered if your eyes are clear of obstruction. With glasses on, your eyes are always skewed so the default expression is chosen for you. You lose a lot of nuance in there.

>>33769085
>If a guy has kids in his 40s the kids are more likely to end up being neurodivergent.

Judging from the way you described your dad, it sounds to me like he was autistic to begin with and you would have ended up autistic regardless. That being said, I doubt you are autistic/ND or whatever. As someone who used to work with actually autistic kids and young adults, it really annoys me when your regular shut-in tries to defend their loser attitude by claiming autism. No nigger, you aren't autistic, you're just a faggot who is now blaming his poor dad.

>>33760922
>>33761763
>texted her last night
>got half an essay of why she couldnt on my day and suggested next week instead
it's on

>>33763543
I havent had sex in 3 years and was thinking about doing this but id rather just be alone at this point. Lmao

Has anyone here ever asked 100 girls out in a day? Like go to a shopping outlet/mall/college campus and just shoot your shot all day until you have like 5 numbers? I'm strongly considering doing this. I've seen videos of pickup artists like Jack Denmo and Vitalyzdtv back in the day and they show really how fucking easy it should be. My plan I guess would be the approach of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mRM1VwUiYA

I know some of these videos can be scripted, but this is definitely authentic.

I have been a social pussy all my life and have only had one serious gf for 5 years that I will be breaking off soon because it is with a milf. I'm at the point where I need to make a change in my life. I have been horrified in starting conversations with random people in general because I always have the feeling in the back of my head that I will run out of things to say and the awkwardness will kill me, which has been basically my life. I just need to fucking get over myself. I'm 32, white, 6'1", am decent looking, have a great job and car

>>33769463
>Jack Denmo
crazy how that guy is in jail and google took down all his channels. plus he has another trial ongoing with a different girl who accused him of rape too.

>5 years
nigga. I don't think you realize how hard it's gonna be to get up to speed after 5 years of being in relationship mode. that complacency will take a while to break out of. worry about meeting one girl before you think about meeting 100.

>>33769463
didn't even check your link first, bruh that's fucking Vitaly, you know the one guy who's so notorious for staging videos that he's basically a living meme, you've gotta be fucking trolling
>this is definitely authentic
yeah lmfao gtfo

>>33769477
Guarantee you Jack didn't do anything wrong, he just got metoo'd and got fucked by his lawyer. Hard to believe that happened though, I know.

and I know it's been a long time since I played the field, I am just trying to get a game plan going in my head and for you guys to call me a retarded faggot. I've considered striking up conversations with girls in clothing outlets while i'm shopping but haven't been able to pull the trigger yet.

>>33769482
I know he stages most of his videos, but I feel like simply cutting to the chase and asking for a number immediately would work on some girls if you are decent looking enough and if you do it enough times. Just need confidence in my delivery and body language

I'm seeing this girl and she's serious about getting into a relationship, she told me she sees herself being in a relationship with my dumbass for some reason, but her instagram is literally her just travelling and going to parties and the concerts of super popular and generic "artists". Basically she's an ultra normie with no soul. But there is a huge positive. She has big tits and is Asian. Do I go for it or find someone else? This is the closest I've ever gotten to being in a relationship after 1.3 years of trying

>>33769531
Hey dude. Stop thinking so much. Its pretty fucking gay. Next time you see a woman youre attracted to go up to her and talk to her. Seriously. You sound like a lame

>>33766959
I'm not reading all of that

>>33767695
Within the first 3 exchanges. Like you should open with a playful remark, see what she says in return, see if you can spin her reply into an invitation or at least nudge her in the direction. Like the other dude said you both matched on a dating app, why beat around the bush with setting up a date?

>>33768021
Not that bad but if you don't have ambition to do anything then you'll stay in a rut forever. Find something you enjoy and cultivate that

>>33768211
>she insists I give real answers.
That is a real answer.

What are you supposed to do after you make a girl blush while talking to her?

>>33768211
>real answers
>to a shit-test question
not possible anon. tell her if she gonna do dumb shit test questions like that the answer is zero minutes and walk away.

>>33770116
tell her she's cute when she blushes

>>33770116
lick her face

Can you guys tell me openers youve used that led to anything? I get stuck in the start of the conversation. I know it varies but this will help. Context doesnt really matter any situation helps

>>33769461
lol, the state of dating. When a literal virgin expect a 8/10 kek

>>33771015
>a non-fat chick
>8/10

How messed up are your standards?

>>33763110 (OP)
I really need help with cold approaches.
I want to stop using datings apps and talk to cute girls at the bookstore but how do I get over my built-in impulse to avoid causing anyone discomfort for any reason whatsoever?
I know that this wouldn't be the case most likely but it still feels strange, the idea of making a stranger suffer for the small chance of personal benefit.
Does anybody know what I mean?
I know it sounds gay and stupid but I am just trying to be honest here and speak plainly.

why are so many women fucking gay now? its like every other chick only likes pussy, wtf

>>33765257
Here are statistics from a study that was done on this subject
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9045786/
For anyone who still claims that glasses don't make a difference. That's a pretty massive difference and we're talking going from being an 8 to sub 5.

>>33771575
Also, those with glasses are perceived as less intelligent. Because, you know, when you're less attractive you're deemed a literal retard. The biggest reported loss is in perceived confidence.

>>33771575
>>33771587
Keep in mind several studies have been done and they have similar findings. Science does not lie.

>>33771261
If you're like me, that impulse to avoid causing others discomfort is actually projection of your own avoidance of causing causing yourself discomfort. The way you get over that is by starting small talk

is this true?

>>33771856
Hole status: Seething

>Very much like a girl a lot
>Can't stop thinking about her and how nice it is being around her and how at ease I feel with her.
>I fear wanting a relationship and it not working out could ruin our relationship forever and I don't want to lose someone like her out of my life
How do I correctly solve this dilemma? Been an issue for me since my high school years and I never figured out how to handle this situation.

>>33772917
Well done, you’ve friend-zoned yourself. The way to combat this is to always, from the very beginning, approach ever female interaction with the goal of dating. You’re not going to be able to backdoor your way into it. Befriend the girls that like you but you don’t like.

>>33772941
You're saying I go forward and approach her, then? Since either way I may risk losing my relationship with her so I should go down after trying rather than going down empty handed and disappointed in myself for never trying at all.

>>33771856
Stop taking twitter seriously

as someone who has got no pussy
has getting pussy changed your life?
even in small or subtle ways
worth it over jerking off?

>>33773591
pussy didnt change my life I remained unchanged still a loser just with knowledge of pussy. I had to escortcell. If I had to go back I would wait to find someone I love or at least Im attracted to.

>>33773591
It will feel great for a month then it will just be normal. Its like what happened after I finally got a car after not being allowed to drive until I was 18. I was jealous of everyone who had cars and I wanted one so bad for years. Now its as normal as riding my bike was as a kid. Getting that monkey off your back will do wonders for your confidence though

>>33773591
As someone who has gotten no pussy, I always thought it was silly to obsess whenever or not you have lost your virginity or not.
It's not like having sex makes you better than anyone else or makes you a better person just like that. Your achievements define who you are, not whenever or not you've put your pp in pussy.
I like to compare the people who overvalue sex like that in the same way people overvalue shit like nofap. Like yeah, it's good to not be addicted to masturbation and such, but doing it won't make you a better person, you make yourself a better person.

>>33773591
Sex with a woman you love is such a massive radical shift in how your brain works. You can chalk it up to brain chemistry or psychology or whatever you want, but it colored and brightened every other part of my life for the better. If you work hard at your job, go to the gym, practice skills, etc. then getting pussy validates all of that ex post facto; you don't desire for anything else. Conversely if you do all of that and don't get pussy it feels terrible and jerking off simply reduces the magnitude of emotional anguish temporarily.

I can't speak to having promiscuous sex outside of a committed relationship, but it probably feels pretty meaningless after a while. Making love never gets old.

>>33773999
Women are not made to be loved, nor can they love. Regardless of how you feel, from her end relationships are entirely transactional. Even if she's thinking and acting emotionally, the end means is still logical. An example where women are very cunning is when it comes to who they're mating with, financially speaking. The sooner you understand this, the sooner your mind will be set free.

>>33774030
Now, can a woman feel attraction? Sure, but just as much as you desire pussy, women desire something abstract that isn't really particularly tied to one man.

>>33774030
>Even if she's thinking and acting emotionally, the end means is still logical
How is this any different for a man? I likewise demand certain things from women, and under certain circumstances can logically cut them off even if I emotionally love them. How is that any different?

I finally met a girl who wants a serious relationship with me BUT she has a recessed chin. That's her massive flaw. Should I still go for it or what?

>>33774213
dating is all about trying. try it. maybe you'll get sick of it, maybe youll grow to think it's cute or even her cutest part.

>>33774213
Idk, is the recessed chin that important/distracting to you? How recessed are we talking? Are her qualities as a woman chin based?
I'd say that unlesss you answer Yes to any of those questions, it wouldn't hurt to try. Obviously don't play with her feelings and if the chin is that much of a dealbreaker then let her know things may not work out. But if how you feel for her or around her is greater than how you feel about the chin, I'd say go for it.
Though I'm more of a personality type rather than looks so I can ignore those kind of things easier.

I am almost 6'1" but have the skinny fat body of Destiny, plus pectus excavatum. I can't lift weights much because of health issues. What do?

I actually can't tell what's my taste in women.
On one hand, I've always said personality and smarts are some of the most attractive features a woman could have and are the traits I'm the most interested on when meeting one.
On the other hand, some of the smartest women I've met with great personalities are also the prettiest and sexy-looking ones I've ever met. So I can't truly tell if I'm attracted to their personalities or looks.

>>33774174
A man can never be attracted to a woman based on something abstract. We're almost always attracted to them based on their looks, including how they feel, smell, etc... it's never about something non-physical. Hence men are on the losing end and are likely to be obsessed with women, whereas women never felt such attraction to begin with. This is why men are manipulated by women.

>>33774389
Specially, since if a woman leaves you, you can't easily replicate her looks. But the smart woman knows that men are everywhere and everything that we can bring to the table for them can be instantly replaced.

>>33774316
How's your diet? Can you at least do high reps of calisthenics? Walking and HIIT cardio will help, too

>>33774492
My diet is clean but I don't eat high protein since I can't lift weights anyway or do anything that stresses my elbows. Maybe I'll take up HIIT cardio when I feel better

>>33771683
Could you elaborate on that? I understabd that talking has nothing to do with information but how do I make this feel anything other than grating? You are making a lot of sense though. I guess other people might find talking without purpose fun or whatever.

>>33771683
Also is this really true? Because ime most people under 25 (specifically the ones I would like to get to know) just want to be left the fuck alone.

>>33763110 (OP)
I'm 30, I'm lonely. I think I deserve to be loved and share that love to someone else.

I'm a white guy but I only get dates with asian women? Why does this happen? I live in a major city on the east coast but my conversations on hinge always fizzle out with the white women. I want white kids. Does this happen to anyone else? I work in tech as a 27M.

You all I think I may just have a girlfriend...

>>33774713
I'd be sooo happy if I was in your shoes I love asian women soooo much

>>33774271
>>33774232
I think I'm gonna go for it because she's asian and has a nice body, I don't think I can pass this up

>>33774553
Prove it.

>>33773999
thanks anon
i mean, I don't know how this works
I figured "so you fuck a bunch of random women until you find the one" but I guess I could just go look for the One, although I worry about sexual inexperience being a problem
yet it sounds like 'Love conquers all' here.
it sounds like finding someone you love is a lot more valuable than shoving your dick inside any pussy that comes around

>>33774967
You're right, I have to prove it first. Time to put myself out there

>>33774713
Same. Go to an asian country and date the white women solo travellers. I went on a date with a american white rich sorority girl in Japan, I had a gorgeous french girlfriend in Japan. I have an icelandic girl coming over this weekend in Japan.

The issue is that due to the cirucmstances, it is mostly going to be temporary and will lead to an LDR, which are gay.

>>33773591
This >>33773624 exactly. Also even when it's lost that reified allure that you build up as a virgin, its still worth it over indulging yourself

How many times have you thought you were getting flirty vibes but were wrong?

>>33774367
Looks are very important though. As a society we shame people for being shallow, but physical attraction is almost always the basis for people becoming partners. Of course you need to look beyond appearances if you want things to be meaningful and last though

>>33775292
Lots of girls are flirts, maybe they are flirting but just don't want to escalate to anything right now for some reason. Consider that too.

>>33774543
>>33774547
Making small talk and being friendly is a normal social skill that needs to be developed and kept sharp. Its hard when youre out of practice and easy to make those excuses to not go out of your comfort zone. When you do it enough times however, the awkwardness eventually subsides and the positive interactions feed into a growing sense of confidence which makes interactions like this enjoyable almost.
From the other person's perspective, being talked to is normally not a huge deal unless they are obviously very occupied with something. People are social creatures and interacting in a pleasant manner wont be off putting For a well adjusted person. Think about times when a charismatic person has interacted with you for a bit — receiving friendly attention probably felt good, and the only awkward part was your own clumsiness navigating responses. Everyone else more or less feels the same way in these situations, all it takes is a little friendliness to get them to be receptive. Its not that they want to be left alone, they are also not at ease making small talk.

Look, i used to (and occasionally still) make the excuse that people dont want to be bothered when I'm feeling apprehensive to talk to them. I have to remind myself that im being a miserable loser though and that a healthy person shouldn't be afraid of offering idle chitchat.

>>33775359
firstly thank you so much for the insightful response!

>person has interacted with you for a bit >receiving friendly attention probably felt good

desu it usually hasn't because I end up just wanting them to shut the fuck up and get to the point (what do they want from me?). I know that this isn't the right way to be but I seriously struggle with the concept. Have you had any experience with this?

>and the only awkward part was your own clumsiness navigating responses

For me it's mostly paranoia + wanting to get back to my daydream or book.
Is it over for me?

>that a healthy person shouldn't be afraid of offering idle chitchat.

I know this to be true and it frightens me that I will have to fabricate a farce in order to succeed.

Again, thank you.

How do I get over that gut wrenching frustration after getting dumped by a 10/10 during the honeymoon phase?
I have a girl coming over this weekend but she just isn't her.

It's over bros
only way to get baddies is by being incredible at something
like one aspect of you has to be in the top 5%

that's why tal lguys have it easy they are already in the top 5% of society through genetics

but evn at 30 yerars old I have no aprt of my life that's in that realm
i'm starting to get my shit together but it might take a long time

I havent been to a club in a long tine but I remember dancing, girls starting to dance in front of me supersuperclose, almost brushing against me but then if I even tapped them on the shoulder they gave me nasty looks. Whats up with that.

>>33775529
it's a shit test, you have to insult them

>>33775530
And then what? Theyll have me removed by a bouncer?

>>33775535
>bro is defeated by his own imagination
anyway
the real lesson here is just do something to show you're higher status than them, or that they're actually below you
only way for them to get attracted to you in the club

>>33771261
So I'm getting really good at this again. Here's exactly how it mapped out for me and I mentioned this in a previous thread...

My gf and I broke up. I hung out with some guys who were skilled, but no where near as skilled as my buddy/wing and I were at our peak. Nevertheless it was enough to jump start me back up and remember fragments of my old self. I knew I needed to approach. I set a goal to just do what I call "hi-byes" which are simple opens you then immediately eject out of. I needed to do about 4 of them before I started to get frustrated that I wasn't sitting in set longer.

So my fifth I approached and then just started bantering. I probably lasted like 5 minutes, but it felt like a drug. I could feel my old self coming back. So the next day I did another and that lasted like 15 minutes and I probably could have gotten her number. I don't live in a great area and again, I was doing this all solo. I went to a bar solo and did very light banter. I wasn't happy with my results, but I'm also really damn hard on myself.

A few more solo outings to various places and eventually you just stop feeling awkward or giving much of a shit. It's like bombing on stage as a comedian. You just keep forcing yourself to go out there and eventually you can even just revel in the awkwardness and use it to get better. So after a few solo outings, I just lost my fear of rejection. I also found myself going "wait, why the fuck didn't I get that girl's number?"

I started meeting people and finding myself able to hold longer and longer conversations with people in general...People see you sort of easily working your way through a crowd and at least not getting awful reactions and go "who the fuck is that guy?" Guys want to hang out with you or more accurately, follow you. Girls start not wanting you to leave. Eventually you find yourself not going out solo anymore and remembering to get numbers and now you start going "I'm pretty sure I could fuck this girl..."

>Cute girl at work obviously wants me
>talk to her
>she drops spaghetti and bails
>keeps signalling
>repeat

How to break out of this?

>>33771261
I think you'll find that what everyone repeats is true:
the first few approaches are always the hardest
but it's' like jumping in the cold pool
you eventually get used to it
but it's a feeling that kind of resets if you don't train it enough

the most practical thing to do is just ask them a question
or practice in your head, when you see someone what would I like to know about them

just go out, walk around, and observe
be curious
once you can just out of genuine curiosity approaching strangers is easy.

this is also the frame you want to have when you approach a girl you are attracted to

liek what the fuck made her so attractive to me
who is she
if you are filled with this kinjd of curiosity then you will naturally HAVE to approach

so in my opinion work on your people observation skills unbtil you can't hold in your NEED to approach

>>33775577
ok re reading this it's a jumbled mess
but the gist is this
your frame right now is
>omg shes so cute i need to talk to her
>but what if i bother her

the right frame is this
>damn she's attractive
>who is she
>i genuinely need to find out

the only difference is that in the first you're trying to go in it with some type of goal
in the second example you literally NEED to approach because your mind needs to solve this problem of figuring out who she is

also, in the second example we go in it with 0 expectations, just being genuine
so we have to train ourselves to be genuinely interested in other people, to a point that we must act because our brain doesn't let us not act

>>33775553
>>33771261
To address your other issues...you aren't going to cause people discomfort on average if you are a fun and interesting person. You might have some self-esteem issues if your demeanor is essentially "I...s...sorry that I'm breathing the same air as you..." so you'd have to figure out why that is and fix it.

There's 4 big tendencies to lean on though.
1. People like to laugh.
2. People like to have fun.
3. People like to talk about themselves.
4. People don't like people who can't read social cues.
If she's not laughing, if she's not looking invested or interested in the interaction, or if she isn't giving her opinion or contributing ANY conversational threads to work with, you can at least pull off number 4 by politely ejecting. So ultimately you really aren't causing anyone harm. You're trying to have a good time and if they don't want to have a good time with you, it's all good..."see ya!" Just get out of your own head and don't overthink this sort of shit. Some stuff you should think a lot about. This stuff isn't it.

>>33767246
become the buffest guy at the gym
or the best looking
or at least in the top 10%

then you'll feel like you deserve all the girls that go to your gym

>>33774389
This just isn't true. Physical attraction is important for both sexes and so is abstract attraction.

>>33774972
It's rare and much easier said than done, but if a woman is truly into you then she's gonna want to fuck you 1000 times. A little awkwardness on the first time is insignificant, you can just try again until things go better. That's how it was with me anyway.

>>33774547
No it's not true, people generally want to be left the hell alone. If I had a bunch of fat chicks wanting to start conversations with me at the bookstore all the time about stuff I wasn't interested in I would get fatigued too; this is basically the average woman's experience as she sees 80% of men as unattractive. I actually revel in causing myself discomfort in order to stimulate personal growth and to this day I still absolutely despise being a bother to other people, both men and women. It has nothing to do with rejection, I feel the same way about starting conversations with strangers in another country to practice a second langauge. I know I will never see these people again and there is nothing to be "rejected" by, it's just practice, but I empathize as a human being and know I'm going to be a bother, so I don't do it. It's just logical.

>>33763110 (OP)
A lot of dudes out there are actually no good at this but they're going to give advice. So anyways one thing I'm good at is maintaining a long-term relationship with a woman. Anybody has any questions about that let me know. I've been married longer than most of you have been alive.

>>33775526
>like one aspect of you has to be in the top 5%
Ezpz man. Just decide and then do it with all of your energy and vitality (most people do not do this so you will win just by deciding) seriously, it ain't easy but it is simple!

>>33775553
What an incredibly moralising response! Thank you man!

>>33775583
>>33775604
>>33775553
I am saving these posts; thank you!

>>33775526
>>33775774
It literally doesn't matter, you can get a PhD in physics and be at "the top" and women will not care less. You just need to be attractive, and failing that, be entertaining. That's it. Women are not going to entertain your gymcel delusions of self improvement to get the baddie.

>>33775702
I would like to hear more about this since you se to understand it isn't about rejevtion but baseline empathy. How to overcome this? Is it correct to?

>>33775786
Well you have to go niche, right? I don't really consider fitness to be a hobby outside of the obvious outliers (bodybuilding etc.), fitness is maintenance. You wouldn't call skincare or fashion a hobby unless you are producing products. It's about producing something genuine to you and then going at it full force.

>>33775796
Yeah but niche shit isn't attractive unless you are already attractive for other reasons. I reiterate that you could go full force into a PhD in physics and produce novel research and women will not care at all. You're better off half-assing like 3 or 4 things that look good in pictures like traveling or making birdhouses.

>>33775814
>You're better off half-assing like 3 or 4 things that look good in pictures like traveling or making birdhouses.

Well sure if you want to attract someone vapid.
Listen, I am not an optimist trying to make you fellate grass and insuflate roses. I get it. Most people are fat, tattooed, generic and have no sense of curiosity and go for the lowest common denominator which makes for a demoralising experience on the sidelines thinking to yourself "I thought we agreed that we werebbetter than animals". It sounds cynical and misanthropic but that is how it makes me feel sometimes.
So how about we skip that back and forth and cut to the chase:
If you could be in the top 5% of something what would it be?
Hell, give me three things.
Forget about women in this ewuation just focus on that question for now.

>>33775830
Look you are certainly speaking the same language as me but I don't think we are going to see eye to eye on the results part of the equation. If we are talking realistically about goals, hobbies, pursuits, etc. then I would pick physics, playing an instrument, and learning a language. I already have a PhD (it wasn't a hypothetical), I've been playing brass instruments since I was a child, and I've been language learning for about a year now. It doesn't matter if I spend 2 hours a day trying to be better and the top 5%, it doesn't matter if I AM the top 5%, women do not care at all about these things. These are things that make for interesting conversation with MEN.

>>33775786
false all the phd professors bang all their students
you're just not top 5%

once you're top 5% you literally have authority
authority = free sex

>>33775920
Then change your advice. It's not about being the "top 5%" of something, it's about being in a position of authority over a woman. Which is obviously circumstantial and is not something anyone can just "work on." People with physics PhDs are literally 99th percentile in intelligence, attracting women has nothing to do with being the best or the smartest at something.

>>33775920
Extorting your grad students for sex on pain of failing them out doesn't really count as pulling.

>>33775942
On pain of failing them? On merit they were going to fail anyways.

>>33775937
nah they're not all 99 percentile
they're mostly in the 80-90
they need to get smarter

anyway, having a position of power over people makes you top level of something.

100%. all your worries would go away if you were just better at whatever you choose to be better at
stop coping

>>33775920
ok I need to clear something up here
Let's say youre the top 5% level iq mother fucker
If so, you need to make that your identity

so yes being the best at something does not automatically guarantee success, but it in fact is a prerequisite to getting women

First you become top level at something that is part of your identity, who you are
Then you become known for that. (meeting people, having a network)
Once your name is out there girls will literally fall into your lap because you're the best at that one thing

>>33775965
Physics PhDs have median IQs of ~140 which is 99.5th percentile, you have no idea what you are talking about lmao.

>>33775975
>Once your name is out there girls will literally fall into your lap because you're the best at that one thing
This is so delusional lmao. Literally everyone I know sees me as "the smart physics guy" and defers to me for advice and information about a wide range of topics. That has absolutely 0 bearing on how women view me from a romance perspective.

>>33775983
Honestly I can't comment on this because let's say hypothetically you are in the 99th percentile of intelligence. (your test scores would be insane)
You'd be seeked out by companies, you'd have access to very good salaried positions
You'd just advance through life in such a simple way

If you wanted to get a girl, the place you work for would easily supply you with opportunities
You'd be giving conferences
You'd be able to write papers, books, videos

But something tells me you're just not there?

I think the missing element other than being insane at something is making that one aspect you're good at your whole life

>>33775845
Well in that case that really sucks man and I would be angry as well. I went the literature route and although that has admitedly paid off with women they never actually care, they just like the surface level implications of it. Honestly, if they don't appreciate you being a genius at physics then that saddens me. I understand why (vapidity and social status being structured around optics instead of actual contribution) but I really don't like it and I apologise for my prior empty conviviality

>>33776017
Life is not that simple. In the first place, the pay with a PhD isn't as amazing as you are thinking, and you generally have to live in high cost of living areas. My friend who I keep up with can *barely* afford a house with his salary. To get those positions at all you have to move very far away as they are in limited locations across the country, and I value my family more than that, so I switched fields. I still make decent money, but I don't have the "status" of the job (which again, doesn't actually attract women. The guys in my program who did get jobs are no more successful with women than I am). Also the gender dynamics are abysmal, it's 4:1 or 5:1 so you don't even stand out within your own company if you even have female coworkers in your department at all. You are correct though in that I didn't go "all in." I did for a time, and while I was going all in and wasting my 20s away in a lab (where the few coworkers I had were all men, by the way) I had no success with women either. So I traded my 20s for very little, unfortunately. When I tell women on dates what I did in graduate school they feign interest before clearly wanting to move on to talk about anything else. And I generally seek out high quality women who are otherwise very polite and mild-mannered, they just obviously don't care about the things I care about, which is fair because I'm very male-brained and they are obviously not men.

>>33776045
It's okay, at least I got my point across. I wouldn't really want to be in your boat either to be honest, but I've come to terms with the fact that the things I find interesting simply aren't interesting to 99% of women unless the woman is autistic (it has happened before and we hit it off). It's basically just hard to connect with women in general and that doesn't seem like it's going to change regardless of what strategies I employ.

>>33776072
>unless the woman is autistic (it has happened before and we hit it off).
Man, I really feel you on this. It has happened to me twice and each and every day I wonder to myself if winning the lottery a third time is even possible, let alone probable.

>It's basically just hard to connect with women in general and that doesn't seem like it's going to change regardless of what strategies I employ.

Yeah, I mean even when I do have a girlfriend I get bored quite quickly and come to realise that she just views me as a novelty, an eccentric instead of an actual person. It is tiring.
The way I feel about it is:
I can't go on,
I'll go on.

>>33775983
"Smart physics guy"
Is not enough. So is the Chad who studied physics courses and knows enough to banter about it. Are you a professor?

>>33776849
No I'm not a professor, and none of them people I know who went "all in" became professors. An extremely small percentage of PhD graduates end up becoming professors and it's not a lucrative career path or one that comes with status outside of academic circles.

>>33763110 (OP)
How do I nab autistic baddie to play games with me? Needs to jack me off with her feet tho

Really feels like I'm missing that in that made up pyramid of needs. It's quintessential

>>33767338
ime no, they either have an SO or aren’t looking because studying. Used to come across a lot of alums while I was still using hinge and I can’t imagine it’s improved at all in the years since I left uni

Didn't want to make a thread for this but I haven't seen an escort in over a year and Im still fantasizing about seeing one even though I'm financially in ruins and should be focusing on getting out of debt that but yet I'm planning my next experience now. Trying to find a girl(friend) to satisfy my urges but its damn near impossible on the apps. I think I'm going to start cold approaching.

>>33763110 (OP)
>Every time I get a reply on Snapchat followed by a good back and forth it turns out to be a scammer
>Every time a real foid opens it she leaves it on read
>There are hundreds of other men messaging her at all times

Is this the state of "modern" dating? Snapchat used to be good up to 3 years ago for chatting up random hoes.

>>33776017
Literal teenager naivety on display here wow

I think me and a female friend micro flirt, might just be in my head, but I think I'm feelin somethin here

>>33775779
>>33775784
>>33775604
I'm glad it helped. Without getting too deep into it, just embrace the frustration, spar with and eventually learn to subdue the heinous shit your own mind will say to you, just keep pressing forward, and eventually learn to laugh at the absurdity of the whole thing. At some point you will feel it, what I call "presence." That's being able to make eye contact with people effortlessly when you walk in a room, that's body language made out of steel (no nervous phantom "where does my hand go?" type shit), that's a smile from a joke you're already formulating in your head about someone or something in the room, that's being outside your own head overall and in the moment.

A little more on the mystical side to consider is this...I don't know if the world is truly what you make of it and you're always getting signals from women or whatever and just not noticing it or if somehow people have a sort of animal-sense that picks up on this shit, but when you have "presence" everything just flows more easily. It's something you can cultivate though seemingly at least in part by just standing in the fire until it stops burning. Keep in mind, I also don't go out smeared in dog shit or looking like a serial killer, so all of this assumes you at least have some sort of style or identity you've already put together. Some fat autist wearing a diaper will probably not get the same mileage other people would get.

Brazil is an easy country to pick up women, right? So the problem is me

https://archive.4plebs.org/adv/thread/30495139/#30502365
Is this guy here? Just wanted to say thank you for putting me on to Red House Painters, they're one of my favourite bands now

I haven't forgotten you, doxxing kike. I will find out about you eventually

>>33778618
Just wait until you listen to Sun Kil Moon (his song Dogs is actually incredibly relevent to this thread)

>>33778570
I once met a BR girl and she told me where she lived they had parties where ur supposed to tonguekiss everyone as a greeting

>>33776072
>switched fields
so your whole life purpose and your actual llife do not align

this is your biggest mistake

>>33777923
thinking it's more complicated than that is the retard's trap
it's literally the meme
the more you complicate things the worse your results

the dumb assumptions are the ones you should pursue

>>33779695
so what I'm getting here is this
>be very good at something
>make that your identity and purpose
as the prerequisite to even get a woman to like you
then you would have to have women enter your life
which would be easy if you satisfy those requirements
why?
if you're good at something and make it your purpose, you will generate proof and status
with that comes social power positions
in social power posisitions you naturally meet people

so the way most people think about it is this:
>acquire a position of power
and that's it

but in reality the position of power comes from having at least one aspect of you in an elite level

What pick up artists who bang 300+ women in 5 years do is become elite level at picking up women
notice how that is also a skill
and then they share what they learn
and then people here parrot it.
but they fail to realize where the results actually come from

and it's just being good at something

>>33779699
It has nothing to to with simple or complex understandings, you're just flat out incorrect in your assumptions.

>>33763110 (OP)
what fitness classes should I take to meet women

How do you get over a oneitis?
There is this girl at my work I’m basically obsessed with because she’s so lovely and warm and I’m bending over backwards to try and run into her so I can get to know her better but now she’s gone for an entire month and I’ve just given up but it’s like I don’t even think about other women because I walk around and see girls and they all look stuck up bitches and bimbos and I don’t want anything to do with them
HELPPP

>>33780025
pilates is where the young girls be going now

Can someone just give me an entire list of places to meet women save me the research. I'm tired of researching dumb ass reddit answers like Salsa classes and running clubs. No one is doing that shit. I'm running out of women at work to hit on

>>33780571
the streets is the place with the most women
public places basically
shops, shopping centers, clothing stores
etc etc
if you're solely focused on volume that's the only place where you're guaranteed constant new women

if you're focusing on a specific niche, then pick anything you like
>sports (pick any sport that has teams)
>language classes
>cooking
>parks
>bars

But, the hottest women hang out where there's a lot of money being spent.
The less money you spend the lower rate of hot women as a general rule:
exclusive lounges, boats, high-end malls, etc etc.

So first step be willing to spend a lot of money.

>>33778956
Already have, and yeah I know kek

Try becoming a serial killer

>>33718118

this adds up with my experience
on a few of my first dates we laughed and i saw signs of approach to kiss but i didn't take it because i was afraid
and these dates ended with the "no chemistry" comment from the girls

just to test it, i kissed the girl in the right moment on 2 other dates and the girls came alive much more than me

asking for nudes or pictures seems the next step in a long chat, so thanks for the advice

[spoiler] also this all sounds very misognist or pickup artist which i feel on myself more and more
should it not bother me that i become like that?
[/spoiler]

>>33766136
this happened with me and my friends too brother, it feels really bad but don't worry about it
it's just stress or alcohol, some even say the first nights are the hardest to get it up
if you two are still dating then just don't fap and you will not be able to not get it up

Have you ever been with a woman who was so much more attractive than any of your exes that you realized how much time you wasted and get depressed?
Also in the same vein just having one thought that she might be too good for you and how it spreads and creates a feedback loop and thusly causes you to make mistakes you had never even dreamed of making with aforementioned exes. It could also be that I was just always that way but as soon as I found a girl with confidence and self respect she saw my behavior and left. She both rose my confidence to new heights and crushed me to the bottom.
All of the memories of her body were memories I thought I'd never have. Like absolute porn tier. I don't know if I should be happy or wish it never happened knowing I can't have her again and I may never get the equivalent again.

>>33781255
if you did it once then you can do it again and even better.

>>33781390
I haven't done it but could I still do it like anon did?

I'm gonna tell you the hardest thing you can do that is worth it with women. If you do this thing you will instantly be more of a chick magnet than what you are now.

Here is the secret:

BE FUCKING PATIENT

>>33782013
Okay to be patient, but doing what? Nothing?

Is giving a girl the ick by being jealous/insecure unrecoverable? Even if you've been with them for years?

>>33782906
It depends on the individual. Universally speaking, it's an uphill battle, though. You have to SHOW her that you're not jealous/insecure and the only way you can do that is with no contact. If that sounds difficult to you, that's exactly why sustaining no contact demonstrates it.

>>33782013
For once I agree with you
>>33782111
It means don't be eager to see her/contact her/etc. Have a life outside of her.

>>33782906
very, the first impression is the most important

How do I stop thinking about every pretty girl getting fucked by massive black cocks

>>33783850
stop watching porn, stop jerking off. have some self respect.
its easier if you know how harmful it really is, i recommend visiting yourbrainonporn.com or reading the book your brain on porn.

>>33783850
What have you tried so far?

>>33781255
Every girl I was with got progressively better looking. I didn't get all existential about it though.

OK, im 30 year old guy, mexican and white, look wyte tall, i like to go out,drink beer, chat up random people. Im not worried but I have been trying to talk to this ecuatoriana who I have been seeing around at these local Hispanic grocery stores for like 2 years, I forgot about her til she popped up at another store. I dont speak Spanish fluently at all, so times she smiles wide and maintains direct eye contact with me and comes around the check stand to talk to me and says bye in English. Other times she looks away and I get no play. I guess that's the answer, no play. I've made friends ,women friends guy friends from going to stores and talking. I just dont know if I bother this girl, its not my intention, I would like to make friends with her,but I cant make another person care. Im thinking of writing a card complimenting her with 100 bucks inside and giving it to her as a " regalo de cumpleanos" just to get it off my chest,then never going back to that little store again. I don't show up there too much,like once a month. Any latino anons with experience deciphering the Latina mind? I've picked up a few non English speaking Latinas, I guess its easier dealing with someone who can speak your language,understand cultural phrases. Not lost in translation. Guys tell me if im being cringe. Of course I am cringe but just tell me if I being a complete fool. I would just like to compliment her,she honestly is so gorgeous, if I had the chance to tell her and nothing more

I cold approached a girl with big tits today.
>rooning around the park near me
>spot a blonde with big tits running (sports bra cleavage, tits bouncing) solid 9/10.
>further down the park I cross paths with another big tittied 9/10, brunette
>"wtf is going on?"
>oddly enough, they were (deliberately) running in the opposite direction of me.
>I was only warming up, but I had to run past them again
>spot the brunette as I'm leaving, and approach her
>"Hi, sorry, what's your name? Oh Stacy? well, I just saw you and I thought your were very pretty and I was wondering if I could get your number"
>she smiled and said thank you, but was reluctant and said no, kindly
>no biggie, that's alright, see you! bye!

I was advised to try this direct approach, "just state your business" type of deal. Was it too direct?
I was also getting dark, so I didn't want it to get creepy or wtv, but there were plenty of people running around and it's a safe country in yurop so...

>>33784044
>forgot to mention
Even though I didn't get digits, I'm still glad I did it because I approached a girl who was my ideal.
I've approached mid before, and it feels horrible if they decline you, but with a truly attractive girl, you feel like you gave it an actual shot.
Aim for the moon.


>btw,picrel, the blonde girl I didn't approach was wearing this, and running around with tits that big. Girl I approached had same size tits, but was wearing some tight t-shirt.

>>33769419
if you say my dad is austistic and therefore i am autistic, how can you then claim im not autistic.

>>33783870
I’m trying but not jerking off to porn makes my hypersensitive to women in the real world which makes it worse
Hopefully if I just continue to nofap it will improve

>>33784071
Nice. Go for it, dont despair.

>>33784185
i know its hard bro but u gotta believe in urself if u wanna power through it. there are tricks like holding a breath for as long as you can if you start to get a boner or have dirty thoughts. whats your sexual experience like?

>>33784044
>>33784071
So yes you were too direct for the energy you were bringing, but your heart is in the right place and don't concede a single ounce of that. That sort of courage is what makes legends - once you actually get your game down.

>>33784044
maintain this kind of courage/enthusiasm without regards to failure and you will be a conqueror

>>33784071
>I'm still glad I did it because I approached a girl who was my ideal.
i have this feeling too. when the woman is exceptionally beautiful, i don't even look back at the rejection with any regret. it's more like: what else was i supposed to do? i took action. i did what a man does. i feel good

I have died 1,000 deaths and by God if it is required, I shall die 1,000 more. There is no agony I cannot endure, no betrayal that can destroy, nor ugliness that can corrupt nor rob me of my light, and so with God as my witness, I swear to him I shall become the man I was always meant to be.

If I am cast out of the heavens, as I fall into the fiery pits of hell with memories of paradise indelibly engraved upon my soul, I shall forever gaze upward at my rightful home, and by tooth and claw with every ounce of strength in my being, I shall painstakingly drag myself inch by inch to return to my rightful place, and know what I once tasted - I will find my way home.

I will return to where I belong, and the way the journey back changes me will by its very training ensure my worthiness.

And so I will pursue it with all that I am, relentlessly, ruthlessly, tirelessly, for nothing but death himself can stop me, and when he comes for me if my task is incomplete and I am thus yet unready, I shall wrestle him until he yields - I will bend even death to the fulfilment of my purpose, for I know precisely who I am and what I must do.

I am incorruptible, impenetrable - immortal - and so I shall stay aligned with truth and beauty, because without them I am nothing, and to become nothing is irrevocable, for it is to die that one last time - to know the final death.

>>33784044
>Was it too direct?
Yes. People don't give their personal phone numbers to strangers. Its not 1952 anymore. Even if she found you attractive the risk of you being psychotic and having her phone number is too great a risk. Cold approaching is end stage autism.

Where do I go to actually meet women? Particularly women who are single and actually want to date men.
If it matters, I'm in my early 30s and in the US, and I'm more interested in getting a gf than getting laid.

I think you guys fail too much because you try too hard.

>>33785015
I am in your shoes, I look good for my age and I still struggle to find women who are at least 6.5s to date.
Dating apps supply me with endless 5s and below, but finding a girl above average is quite hard

The hottest girls i've dated in my life were from talking to them in person in public.
so now I'm just going out and approaching
60 days of this shit and no luck.. though

>>33785110
perhaps true

>>33785357
How do you guys even find girls like that in places where they are not busy or actively chatting in a group of friends? It seems impossible, like it’s me on one side and girls on the other side and there’s multiple impenetrable barriers in-between.

A zoomer girl said I was "chill" and then fistbumped me as we parted. She has not yet texted me in a few days. Is it dead in the water?

I had a quick chat with a girl in the park, I said we should get dinner she said why not, I put out my whatsapp qr code for her to scan and she "scanned" it and we went our separate ways. Hahahaha smooth

>>33785512
(she didn't add me)

>>33785516
nigga who cares, that's why you always give girls your number, that way you don't call and harass them barking up the wrong tree. you saved time by doing that

>>33785015
>and I'm more interested in getting a gf than getting laid.
bro in America that is the same thing unless you're like super religious or something (which i hope you are)

>>33785454
there's plenty of girl who go out by themselves where I am
and usually if you're polite and have a calm attitude it's easy to have a conversation

the belief that you're a nuisance probably stems from the belief that you're not where you're supposed to be
and that's the hard part of dating, being comfortable in your own skin

Also, success with approach comes from repetition and scheduling time to do it.
But it's fucking tough

>>33785610
>the belief that you're a nuisance probably stems from the belief that you're not where you're supposed to be

Maybe. I always think whenever I strike up a conversation with anyone, guys or girls, they don't really want to be chatting and are just being too polite to tell me to fuck off. I can't really read people and I don't want to accidentally start harassing strangers just because I don't know whether they are interested in being friends/being more and are just shy or whether they really are wondering why this random a-hole is bothering them and won't piss off already.

Just came from a club.

I'm a relatively attractive but short male.

I was awkwardly hanging out there, tipsy, despite 8 drinks down (I used to drink alone day after day) but tipsy.

I was on medication for most of my teens that killed my sex and romantic relationship pursuit drive.

Anyway, I made eye contact with this pimped out girl. This one guy was grabbing two girls asses, to include hers.. she held eye contact with me then said "all you have to do is dance"

My takeaway is that women are well aware that we men are nothing more than animals that compete with each other for women.

In my case I'm a hopeless romantic so it makes it even harder, but still. Competing against.

The mini club closed soon after. I left. Smoked a cigarette. Got in my Uber.

>>33785900
>I can't really read people and I don't want to accidentally start harassing strangers just
this is a good thing when approaching actually
the fact that you're cautious about it puts you above most guys who approach girls (creepy)
those guys don't care how they're being perceived

I think the thing that helped me is to have a strategy
1) you breathe and approach calmly
2) you greet and explain what you are doing
> hey i was just going to the store over there, hey there, I am just waiting for a friend here, hey i am just xxx etc .
3) you explain why you talk to her
>your dress looked good on you, you seem like an interesting person, i found you really cute and wanted to say hi.
4) you make it look like it's a huge coincidence or you don't do this
> i don't usually do this type of thing, but i would have regretted not going up to say hi
5) is where it depends on the situation and you just talk about the space you two are in
> so what made you come here
6) is the key moment, once they start asking you questions, or being curious about you is when you know they are vibing with you

so those first 5 steps will happen pretty much everytime and girls will respond well
but the 6th step is where you look out to see if they actually want to talk to you and they will do that by being interested in you.
after that it's basically a 10 minute convo and you can choose to either

>say hey i'm going to this coffee shop over there, you should come with let's talk more
>actually i got to go, but i enjoyed talking with you, let's grab a drink / coffee / fodo sometime why don't you give me your contact info

this is the general script
just follow this and you can approach without worry

How the fuck do I genuinely meet white women my age (mid to late 20s)
I’m looking at all these meetup.com groups and it’s all old people or Indians

>>33785110
I dont try at all because I don't know how or where. That plus im ugly. 0 matches on daiting apps and in real life I always have people assuming im pissed, mad or saying something about my face/expression. Its only been men saying that though since Im not around women in my daily life.

I had women around me in 2017, then I fell ill, I'm slowly getting my health back now, I passed my medical exam and now I wanna meet a girl.

No idea where to go outside of college, I feel lonely and anxious.

>>33767576
>she's looking for a good dude to fuck
>I acted like her friend
>imagine my surprised when her pussy dried up and she bailed
A few sentences about the cat is fine, but then change the topic to her. Give her a compliment if that's possible of something you liked from her pics other than her ass/tits. Then gently steer towards an IRL date ASAP.
Talking online is a waste of time. People make their decision of whether to fuck/date/ditch in person 90% of the time.

>>33786176
Dating apps.

>>33786332
Don’t want to because it feels very superficial and judgmental and high pressure.
I just want to be in low pressure situations/groups where I can meet women and get to know them first before seeing if I fancy them

>>33785979
Thanks anon, I think I'll probably fuck up on step 6 since my usual instinct is to bail if the conversation isn't 100% "on" at all times and some of the girls I see that I'd like to approach are usually in social situations where it'd be super weird to try it (for example, a little while back I saw a really attractive girl at a con, that I once noticed on my commute and chickened out of approaching, where she was doing professional cosplay. I told myself that if I ever saw her again, I would talk to her out but doing it in a situation like that seemed like it'd just get me labeled a creep so I let it go even though it killed me inside).

>>33786343
Okay I dont agree with your feelings but whatever. I meet a lot of girls platonically through my friends that have girlfriends. Like when we're going out in a group their girlfriends always bring their friends too or when they throw birthday parties. I'll see familiar faces a couple times a year.

>>33784071
post more huge titty sluts mmmmmm
MOTIVATION

>>33786473
I got you. Last month I was with a flat chested girl with vaginismus. Never again. I'm vocel'ing untill I get a girl with decent tits. I keep this board for motivation/focus

>>33786548
Usually I think skinny petite chicks are "my type" but there is something both arousing and comforting about BIG FUCKING NATURAL TITS
do you have any more of that tattood girl with the titty veins on the top row holy FUCK
I would give ANYTHING to have a girl like that on her back smiling that cute smile as I JIZZ all over her chest

>>33786587
>@vicky_aisha
>I would give ANYTHING to have a girl like that on her back smiling that cute smile as I JIZZ all over her chest
I had that once, but she broke up with me. Really miss it.

>>33786822
Do titcows mind or like it when you go crazy over their tits? Especially with stuff like boob jobs or busting all over them
only girlfriend I had had B cups

>>33786963
I only had one gf with big tits, so it's hard for me to say exactly. She wasn't very confident about them, but towards the end of the relationship she said she was now more confident because of me. At the end of the day, you are glorifying her body, so I think it's a good thing and they like it.
The other tits cows I fucked were escorts, and it was obvious their customers sought them for their huge tits, and knew what they had to do.

>>33787021
interesting…. I’ve never used sex workers but it’s pretty tempting to drop a couple of hundred just to go crazy on a pair of massive milkers once
Appreciate your input

>>33785492
Yes, but in large part due to you not following up. Its too late now

>>33787058
I haven't used one in a while, but I've also been missing big tits. but these Brazilian hookers are asking for too much, 70€ is too expensive for only 30min.

>>33786343
Dating apps are as low pressure as you can get. The trick is to have high self esteem and low expectations for great things

>>33787185
>you not following up
What do you mean by "following up"? She has my number, I don't have hers

>>33787224
Should have gotten her number instead of giving her yours. You could have also had her call you on the spot when she got your number. Regardless, by not getting her number one way or another you put the ball in her court. Learn for next time.

>>33787286
>You could have also had her call you on the spot when she got your number.
She tried but her phone's service was off
>by not getting her number one way or another you put the ball in her court
That was smart of her. It prevents having some random dude you don't care to talk to texting you incessantly about stupid shit.

>>33787444
Yes, it's a classic move women use when they're not interested but they don't want to turn you down to your face. That and fake numbers.

>>33787448
Weird. She talked to me for an hour or so afterwards. We shared DeviantArt accounts but I haven't been able to log in :\

any advice for being military guys? i assume a long term relationship is off the table?

im only a year time in service, still in school for another year or so. will get out asap, three years from now.

>>33787444
>She tried but her phone's service was off
Rip

>>33787510
Ltrs are still on the table, just know that deployments and especially PCSs are going to be an obstacle for you to stay together. Just keep in mind that deployments are temporary and theyre no good reason to break things off if you both have the maturity and patience. And by the time you PCS you should have a good idea if its worth continuing the relationship after you move. If thats the case, then you can do a long distance relationship for a bit (which sucks) or have her independently move with you. And of course if uou know for certain you want to spend your life with her then obviously you can marry her. The only issue is that a likely majority of military marriages start due to wanting to stay together through a PCS without having a strong enough foundation. So just be as certain about things

T. Former Air force who did the LDR thing through a PCS only to have it fall apart leaving me to be incredibly grateful that I didn't marry her before hand

What do I do after I get the number? I usually cold approach girls that smile at me and stare at me and just straight up ask for their number. I’ve never had a girl say no or give me the wrong number. After a couple of days its just dies off and I stop texting or they stop out of boredom.

About to go ask this girl for her number now.

>>33787814
Are you getting numbers just for the sake of it?
>After a couple of days its just dies off and I stop texting or they stop out of boredom
Ask them out, meet in person, build a relationship, etc. Do you have a plan to do any of that?

>>33786343
>>33786176
I've been doing voluntary work, specially in a group where you have to join in only in October, and then there's a bunch of meetings, and weekend activities. I did a summer camp and fucked a 20yo student. I'm 30.

>>33787822
Cute girl with a nice ass was staring at me. So I looked over smiled and said hi. She smiled said hi back. I was busy so it was in passing.
I’m walking down the hallway and I notice her looking at me again but I just walk passed her because I’m still busy.

Then I walked passed her again this time we were both looking at each other. I smiled she smiled I then asked for her number. She asked if I have instagram instead. I told her I don’t have any social media which is true. She said alright then gave me her number.

Then I left awkwardly because I had to get back to work. Probably should’ve talked to her longer.

>>33787814
I'm going to do some armchair psychology that might help you. Obviously disregard it if it's totally off the mark. I suspect you're cheating yourself in order to avoid the discomfort of talking to these girls in real time. For you, "getting the number" is an ego boost which is more valuable to you than actually fucking these girls or getting to know them because it might result in failure and harm to your ego. You wait for what you think is a surefire thing, then you approach, get the number, bail, and then try to maintain "heat" that wasn't really ever stoked in the first place.

If the girl is into you enough right out of the gate to give you a number that she actually responds to, then she should very likely be into you enough to let you shoot the shit with her, build attraction, build rapport, etc. such that you could make out with her, maybe even fuck her, or at the very least get enough "heat" built that your texts result in actual day 2s. So your issue is that you're basically doing a stronger and more satisfying version of "open and eject," but you need to get comfortable actually interacting with women and THEN getting their number if needed.

You need to get out of your comfort zone which I suspect you're deliberately staying in and it's costing you meaningful interactions/closes.

>>33787814
set up a meeting face to face immediately. find some fun activity to go do. have beers after.
Connection is done in person. Girls are sick to be on the phone just like we are. It's also gay to text.

>>33788025
I don’t like texting myself. It’s why I don’t have social media. I don’t use emojis and I don’t use slang. I’m 23 but I text like I’m 40. Only an issue with younger women. Older women don’t say I’m weird in text so yeah.

>>33788022
I’m not a virgin. I know how to make out. I know how to tempo, rhythm, and pace to make a girl cum. my dick is bigger than average. That’s not the discomfort. The discomfort is what you said. Interacting with women that actually like me. A woman will only like you for so long. Keep doing the ignore and not talk. You’re boring and the interest is gone. Can’t be believing in crushes like you’re in school when you’re a grown man. Comes off as being wishy washey. You can just ask the girl out is my mentality.

>>33788101
>The discomfort is what you said. Interacting with women that actually like me.
The way you beat that is acclimation and reps. It might feel like a significant obstacle in your mind, but it will shrink rapidly once you put some energy into confronting it.
>A woman will only like you for so long. Keep doing the ignore and not talk. You’re boring and the interest is gone.
Absolutely. That's the whole buying temperature thing. So the thing is, opening and number closing eventually just become "inner game" tests. If you can develop a productive mindset towards them, they become purely mechanical. They're not really risky ultimately. You do them and they're totally in your power to do them. Where the real game is played is between the open and the number close, the make out, or the fuck. That is the messier and more chaotic part, but it should also eventually become the fun part.

That's the part where you can show your personality, your identity, your frame, etc. and it's really where the bulk of "game" comes into it. That's where you pump the "heat" and if you don't make out or fuck that day, you easily get a number and can massively up your probability of a day 2 where you can make out or fuck then. Your awareness of this puts you ahead of most. You just need to occasionally experiment with hanging in set a little longer. Just my opinion, again disregard it all if you like how things are.

Good bio for tinder for male

>>33769420
>texts me out of nowhere about her day and stuff
>go back and forth a few days
>go see her after she gets off a meeting
>she practically jumps at me and gives long kisses
think i accidentally fucked her too hard, guys

>match with girl
>she doesnt respond to my msg
This shit is so ass if you arent giga looksmaxing. These women are all shallow whores anyway. Got me fucked up thinking im gonna put in extra work for some cookie cutter coochie.

Where are good places to cold approach, I tried the mall today, but all of the women were either with their Moms, in groups, looked 15, not ideal situations to approach. I approached 1 woman but I choked, where else can I try?

>>33788544
Despite what I posted I don't want to try bar/clubs, I don't think I'll find girlfriend material there

Another birthday without a HJ, BJ, or sex. My wife made me dinner and a cake but it was also because we had guests over. I think the final nail in the coffin has been hit. I get her love language is food but I can skip entire meals I don't care about food at all. Shes on her period but can't give me a F***in bj or hj? I've spent over $300 going to strippers this week to get something (with no luck) I can't believe she made me waste all this money. Should I just get out and talk to the stacy at cafe nearby that likes me?

>>33786353
yea that makes sense if the vibe doesn't feel right bailing is usually the correct move
the way you know for sure if the vibe is right is if they show interest in you through
>asking you questions
>generally smiling
>holding good eye contact with you
>laughing at jokes

you'd probably need at least one or two of the above to continue the convo
but sometimes just going for the ask anyway builds the muscle

>>33763110 (OP)
who was in the wrong here?

I'm a tall 35, good looking but socially retarded y.o. guy.
today I took the bus home and there was this young girl (I guess she about 19-22) sitting beside my assigned seat. she's pretty, smiles when I talk to her and I realize a bit later that I've seen her before. cool.
I try to start a conversation with her with some random shit and she answers. she's eating something and I'm careful to wait for her to stop eating to start. I also tell her, explicitly, that she can tell me if I'm annoying her or something (I usually don't realize). but her answers are short and barely says or adds anything, and never asked me anything back, so after a while I assume she's disinterested both in me and in any conversation, and I decided to just stop talking to her, though I was unsure if she wanted to keep talking or not. I start looking at random shit from the windows, and later grabbed my phone and started reading the news, though from time to time I looked at her and her phone to see what she was doing. because of my doubts, I tried talking to her again later, but she seemed kind of offended or some shit... so I just put on my earphones and ignored her after that. when the bus got to her stop, she got up without even looking at me, and I noticed that she talked to another woman that had been sitting at the seat in front of ours... and that woman says something like "what a humilliating trip". she probably heard my attempts at starting a conversation...

what did I do wrong here? should I have "forced" her to talk? did I not get the clue in time about her being annoyed at me and my talk? was that comment about "humilliating trip" a message for or about me or something?

am I retarded? if you think I am, why do you think so?

>>33789266
>I'm a tall, good looking but socially retarded 35 y.o. guy.
fixed. I messed up lol

>>33788151
You’re right.
I don’t like being out my comfort zone. I think I realized that once I put energy into it i will fix it. Issue is I got into a relationship and I stopped that progress. And didn’t truly get over my problems and issues and it boiled into the relationship.

I used to be ugly. Extremely. I had a “glow up” and honestly worked on myself appearance wise. I’m 6’2. 175 lbs. now. Used to be fat. I also have a long hair and beard. I Go thrifting buy nice clothes. I Completely changed up my style.

I realized Some of the”red pill and black pill” is right.

You literally have to look a certain way for women to even consider you. Then you have to act a certain way to court them.
Anyway I did the bullshit and got outside my comfort zone and possibly fucked yo texting her. But I’m going to leave it alone and see her irl eventually then explain. Maybe that will Reset the energy.

>>33789390
Not explain and say sorry.

If I notice her eyeing or staring at me. I’ll just approach again. Not saying sorting saying I don’t have social media. Then reset the energy. If she comes off like I’m being weird I’ll just leave it alone.

>>33789266
Idk homie,its touch and go,imagine the reverse, a guy being mad and disgusted a woman he didn't like try to make convo. I guess you will never see her again so be it. What convo starters did u try?

>>33789524
>Idk homie,its touch and go
what do you mean?

>What convo starters did u try?
I just asked her a question about the way and at what time she got her ticket (I asked her this because I had trouble getting the tickets, and it's the only thing that came up when trying to think of a non-retarded contextual question). at first she replied just fine, but later she started replying with shorter and shorter phrases.

new thread
>>33789678

>>33789678

>>33789678

>>33786176
Brother go to hiking meetups from meetup.com
There's a healthy mix of all people. Also singles. But it also depends on the city

>>33788544
Book fairs seemed great. I saw a lot of early and mid 20's girls, just strolling around with their girl friend.
I was with my mom and sister, otherwise I would've approached.