>>81766030
hello fellow traveler, im someone diagnosed with PTSD too and would like to offer help to you like anons have helped me. I will list my advice in tips, feel free to reply with questions.
1. PTSD symptoms are an over-adaptation to a shitty environment. The disassociation, derealization, vigilance, and misery are all useful in environments of danger. The vigilance keeps you on your toes for danger and the disassociation and derealization help you deal with the pain that comes your way. You are not broken, you are merely using the wrong technique now that you are out of danger.
2. stop claiming to be "lazy/selfish/anxious/depressed" and completely blame yourself for your condition. Traumatic events that cause PTSD physically changes your brain chemistry (
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-exactly-does-ptsd-do-to-the-brain-2797210). This literally means the patterns of thinking you have are physically ingrained into you. This is not to say the situation is fatal, but it is to say that, on some level, you can't completely hate yourself for it.
3. Your best resource on PTSD research is the VA:
https://www.ptsd.va.gov/. Their tools and resources will let you know what options you have to treat your condition.
4. Despite the critique from most of r9k: Therapy is your friend. However, make sure you find someone with a focus on PTSD, Trauma, and/or has worked with members of the Military. "Talk Therapy" generally is ineffective and slow at treating PTSD, but isn't totally useless. A good therapist with experience can help you find treatments that work for you (I.e, EDMR, Exposure therapy, and in some, cases psychedelic-assisted therapy).
