>>942140323

HOW VIDEO GAMES TURNED YOU INTO A HOMOSEXUAL:

when all the other boys were learning how to interact with girls on the playground, you were sitting on your sedentary effeminate ass staring at a video game

when all the others were experiencing life's rites of passage, You were collecting cheat codes and watching the worst animation on planet Earth

when all of the other boys were learning how to ask girls out on dates, you were playing super Mario Brothers

when all of the other boys were experiencing their first kiss, you were playing magic The gathering and fantasizing about being a four-year-old female pixie in an enchanted forest

when all of the other boys were taking their girlfriends to the prom, You were begging your mother to buy you a new Xbox

And now that the other boys are grown men, married with children, there you sit all by yourself in your mother's spare bedroom, after staying awake all night long, refusing to look for a job, unable to afford a pair of socks without asking Mommy for the money

bragging about being a life failure

WORK ON YOUR SPELLING

>>942021724

you'll never find a more profound ass than me...

not in here, and not in the real world...
or so I've been told

>>941675815
I've always said by the time you're asking questions, you already know the answer

>>941619504

Why is it taking you so long, MR INTIMIDATING GAMING CHAIR HACKER EINSTEIN?..........

WHAT THE FUCK IS TAKING YOU SO GODDAMN LONG???!!!!!

HURRY THE FUCK UP, MR INTIMIDATING GENIUS HACKER

IT'S REALLY SIMPLE, YOU SAWED OFF LITTLE BITCH: MY IP ADDRESS

HURRY THE FUCK UP, FAGGOT

.......... I'M WAITING, DOUCHEBUCKET™

sorry I was outside with my wife using speech to text and it made a couple typos

I said it was OLD AS SHIT*

Just like me.. I'm also old as fuck

But the screwdriver was only like 7 in long including the handle, right? A little flathead screwdriver, old as fuck COMPLETELY BROWN AND CORRODED like it had been dug out of the ground or something lol

It was just a piece of shit I found on a job site, laying next to the building I was painting a mural on..

I found an old rusty piece of shit little screwdriver, a little flat head, which was perfect for popping open the cans of exterior paint I was using for the mural

And I just so happened to still have that little fucking screwdriver in my pocket... when I found myself in a very dangerous situation dealing with somebody who was completely fucking delusional.

And like I said it was a really crazy fight, and I sustained a serious injury, I had to get stitches

But motherfucker I swear to God I'm not lying

I swear on my mother's ashes

I PUT THAT FUCKING SCREWDRIVER DIRECTLY THROUGH HIS FUCKING FACE

DIRECTLY INTO HIS SINUS CAVITIES

I'll never forget his face because his eyes looked down and crossed trying to look at the screwdriver going into his face

100% true

NOBODY WON........
WE BOTH LOST BIG TIME..........

But I put a screwdriver directly through that motherfucker's goddamn fucking face

>>941600452
ANSWER:
you don't have a job, bum

obviously.... duhhh

which, technically speaking, makes you lower than any nigger I've ever seen.. at least those niggers had an excuse, but you don't have a fucking excuse...

You're just a lazy piece of shit...
You're just a burden on society...

YOU CAN'T SUPPORT YOURSELF
YOU CAN'T AFFORD INTERNET SERVICE
YOU LIVE WITH YOUR MOTHER

And the answer to your question is:
SOMETIMES

sometimes you'll actually remember to take out the trash and do the dishes and clean up a little bit around the house to help your mother out

But very often, you conveniently continue forgetting about it, and making excuses

promising her you'll remember next time as she rolls the trash can down to the curb

YOU WORTHLESS FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT:

I WILL MONEYWIRE TRANSFER $2,500 IMMEDIATELY IF ONE OF YOU CAN TELL ME MY IP ADDRESS

................ The offer still stands

let's see how talented you alleged hackers are

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

>>941382639

I know it wasn't...

It was effluent

TRUST ME, BRO:

since it's sex she's using as a commodity, SEXUALLY ABUSE HER

be rude..
Don't say anything about her cheating
Just start fucking her the way you would treat a cheap fucking throwaway whore

and make it very obvious that you're disrespecting her with your penis

But keep your mouth shut

end And then on one of their upcoming rendezvous:
APPEAR OUT OF NOWHERE

and ask her if she knows where you left your headphones, then shake his hand and tell him "It was an honor to finally meet you after all this time"

AND WALK OUT LIKE A SELF-CONFIDENT MAN ™