>>22806520
honestly i relate to you quite a bit, except i haven't gone to college and am currently a NEET
i cope by playing games and giving advice, but i hate myself alot and feel like a lazy coward
i'm afraid of ending up doing landscaping or warehouse work or joining the military
i think what helps is to imagine what sort of place in the world you would be happy with, what sort of people you want to be around, etc
figure out how to get by and make money separately
work on both at the same time, as two separate tasks, and hopefully they'll eventually converge
it's not like you're committed to either "work" or "play", though it might be that way for a while